When The Bough Breaks
by EmilyGrace18
Summary: A terrible accident leaves three brothers reeling with grief and loss. But then, against all odds, what was lost is returned to them. Or is it? The Hamato clan soon learns that there is more than one way to lose a brother.
1. Chapter 1

_Hello All! Welcome to my second story. I am super excited about this one, which I think will be quite a bit longer than my first fic "Bad Day." I hope everyone enjoys! Make sure to let me know what you think…_

_Thanks to NeoMars for beta reading this chapter for me. I tinkered a bit after she was done, so any remaining errors are mine!_

_Disclaimer: Don't own them. Never have, never will._

**Chapter 1**

"Guys, turn on the TV."

Leo looked up from his book as April came bursting into the lair, her hands full of grocery bags and her cheeks flushed. She rushed over to the kitchen table where she hurriedly deposited her load, then quickly returned to the living room, glancing all around in search of the remote.

"It's beside Master Splinter's chair," Leo told her calmly, memorizing the page number he was on and closing his book. "What's up, April?"

"It's almost time for the news," April answered breathlessly. "Something's happened that I think you guys should see." She grabbed the remote, then paused, glancing around the quiet lair, apparently realizing for the first time that Leo was the only other person in the room. "Uh…where are the others?"

Leo shrugged. "Raph and Don are out inspecting the security system in the south tunnels, and Mikey's in a private session with Sensei."

"Oh," April answered, lifting the remote and punching the power button. "I guess you'll just have to fill them in, then." She quickly began flipping through the channels as she walked over to the couch and sat down next to Leo. "They've been reporting on it all morning, but they obviously have no clue how significant it is and…oh wait, here it is. Just watch for yourself."

Leo frowned slightly at April's obvious agitation, but obediently turned his attention to the TV.

A commercial for laundry soap was just ending, and the emblem for Channel 3 News flashed across the screen. A second later two well-dressed reporters appeared sitting behind a wide mahogany desk. The words "Breaking News" were boldly displayed on the screen behind them.

"_Good morning_," one of the reporters greeted crisply, smiling serenely into the camera, "_and welcome to Channel 3 News at ten. Our news begins this hour with continued coverage of the explosion that rocked downtown New York early this morning. Our reporter Gregg Davis is at the scene now with more information… Good morning, Gregg._"

The screen flashed to a field reporter standing before a police barricade. Lights of emergency vehicles flashed all around him, and behind him the damaged and scorched husk of a three story brick building could clearly be seen.

"_Good morning, Jane_," Gregg replied briskly, launching directly into his report. "_At approximately 5:15 this morning, police and fire rescue personnel were called to the 16__th__ block of Washington Street after receiving reports of an explosion. Upon their arrival to the scene, they found this building.._." he twisted so he could point behind him at the ruins… "_heavily damaged and on fire. The blaze was quickly brought under control, and police are currently investigating the cause of the explosion, which took out a portion of the south wall on the third floor. Luckily, the building was abandoned, and no injuries have been reported_."

Gregg paused in his report, allowing the camera to pan in to show an up close picture of the damaged building. "_In a statement released earlier this morning, Police Chief Regan said the police are currently exploring several leads and have not ruled out the possibility of foul play. This statement came after eyewitnesses apparently reported seeing several suspicious individuals leaving the building immediately before the blast. The witnesses claim the individuals appeared to be wearing incredibly life-like animal costumes, and were acting in an aggressive and threatening manner. In his statement, Chief Regan warned the public that the costumes could possibly be the signature of a newly developing gang, and urged residents in the area to keep an eye out and report any suspicious activity to police immediately. In the meantime, a reward of $500 has been offered for any information leading to an arrest_."

Leo exchanged a quick glance with April, but the reporter's next words brought his attention back to the TV.

"_The abandoned building, which we have learned is owned by Saki Industries, has reportedly been scheduled for demolition for over a year. Despite that, several witnesses claim they have seen an African American man in a wheelchair coming and going from this location regularly. Police are searching for the man for questioning, but have not yet been able to identify him. Anyone with any information is asked to call the Crime Stoppers Hotline on the number listed on the bottom of your screen_."

"Stockman," Leo growled, suddenly understanding why April had been so adamant they see this. It had been over six months since they had last seen or heard anything from Stockman, but Leo had always suspected the scientist was still out there somewhere, planning and scheming from the shadows. Now he knew for certain, just as he knew that Stockman was still firmly in Shredder's pocket. The cops were looking for him, but they wouldn't find him. Leo would bet his twin katanas that Saki already had him hidden away somewhere in another one of his abandoned and scheduled for demolition buildings elsewhere in town.

Gregg was continuing his report, moving on to describe the minor damages suffered by neighboring buildings and the reactions of nearby residents. As the camera panned out to cover a view of the entire street, Leo caught a glimpse of a familiar figure lounging against a parked police cruiser. Karai looked strangely formal in a blue pant suite with her hair pulled back in a loose bun, but he still would have recognized her anywhere. Her eyes were fixed on the charred ruins of the building in front of her while a young officer stood chatting animatedly at her side, staring at her with unconcealed admiration. Leo let out a soft snort. The idiot had _no_ idea who he was dealing with…

"So what do you suppose they're up to?" April asked, pulling his attention from the screen. "Shredder and Stockman, I mean," she clarified unnecessarily. "Something tells me they weren't playing with puppies and kittens in that building."

Leo slowly shook his head. "No," he agreed softly. "I have no idea, but whatever they _were _doing, it looks like it went south on them. And if Shredder thought it was important enough to send Karai to monitor the situation, then it must be pretty serious."

April looked startled. "Karai was there?"

"Yeah," Leo sighed. "Probably acting as the pretty face for Saki Industries while at the same time making sure the police don't find anything they're not supposed to."

"So what are we going to do?" April asked, muting the TV as it went to commercial.

Leo rose from the couch and walked over to the table. He began to put away groceries while mulling over what he had learned from the news report. "There's really only one thing we _can _do," he finally answered her. "We'll keep monitoring the news throughout the day, and then, once it's dark, the guys and I will head up to check out that building and see if we can find anything. It's a long shot, but maybe we'll get lucky. Stockman's obviously long gone, and the police will have taken anything they think is evidence, but maybe they'll have missed something that will give us a clue. It's worth checking out just to make sure."

April let out a deep sigh, causing Leo to pause sorting through the groceries to look at her questioningly.

"Just…be careful," she requested softly, leaving the couch and joining Leo at the table. "I know you guys do this type of thing all the time, but for some reason I just have a bad feeling about this."

Leo regarded her solemnly, not immediately answering. Unlike Raphael, he was not one to mock intuition, especially in someone as attentive and aware as April. Her warning sent faint tendrils of unease through his own mind, but it wasn't enough to make him change his mind about his plan. "We'll be careful April, I promise," he assured her, giving her a small smile to let her know that he was taking her seriously, and his words weren't just empty promises.

She returned his smile with a small one of her own. "I guess I'm turning into an old worry wart when it comes to you guys, but I can't seem to help it," she sighed. "You all seem to attract trouble like rotten meat attracts flies."

Leo wrinkled his beak in disgust. "Nice analogy," he grunted. "And I'm not sure what you're talking about. Things have been pretty quiet lately…so much so that Raph's beginning to go a bit stir-crazy. He hasn't had anyone to punch in at least a week, and I think it's starting to get to him."

"Well, you know what they say about the calm before the storm." April muttered, grabbing a bag of chips and putting it away in one of the cupboards.

Leo smiled at her, warmed by her concern. April carried a unique position within their family, half the time acting as the protective and overly concerned mother they had never known, and the other half like an older sister. Even though she had only been part of their lives for the last few years, Leo couldn't imagine life without her.

On impulse he reached out and hooked one arm around her shoulders, pulling her in for a brief hug. "Relax, April," he murmured. "We're just going to poke around a bit and see what we can find. We'll be fine. I'll look after the others, I promise. "

April returned his hug with a brief but fierce one of her own, murmuring into his shoulder, "I know…you always do." A moment later she pulled back, giving him a wavering smile before returning to the task of putting away groceries. Leo joined her, and together they worked on in silence.

Neither could know the horror and tragedy that awaited them before the night was over…

* * *

"_The area's clear on the north side. Donnie, what do you see from your position_?"

Donnie peered over the edge of the building he was currently crouched on, the roof of the burned out hulk that was their target only a few yards in front of him. He keyed up the radio, keeping a watchful eye on his surroundings as he replied. "Everything's quiet over here as well, Leo. There's a single cop car down on the street, but no one has come in or out. I can see the hole on the side of the building. It will make a good entry point if you and Raph want to make your way over here."

"_We're on our way_," was Leo's simple reply before the radio went silent.

Donnie glanced over his shoulder and let out a soft whistle to gain Mikey's attention. His younger brother was standing on the far side of the roof, his back turned to Donnie as he scanned the surrounding rooftops, keeping an eye out for any trouble that might come at them from behind. At Donnie's signal, he abandoned his vigil and hurried over, his steps quick and sure, yet strangely absent of his normal exuberance and wild energy. Mikey was a goofball ninety percent of the time, but when the occasion called for it, Donnie knew his little brother could be as serious and focused as Leo. And tonight, there was something about their mission that had them all just a little on edge.

Well, everyone except for maybe Raphael. Donnie suspected that his red-banded brother was actually _hoping_ something might happen. But that was just Raph, and _he_ was at least ninety percent crazy, so Donnie wasn't too surprised.

"What's up," Mikey asked as soon as he reached him.

"Raph and Leo are on their way," Donnie told him. "We're going to go in through there," he pointed toward the hole on the third floor.

Mikey nodded, reaching down to his belt for his grappling hook. "You think the floor over there will be strong enough to hold our weight?" he asked, peering over at the other building concernedly.

Donnie blinked at his brother, surprised Mikey would even think about something like that. Usually that was his job. Mikey was more of the "leap first, make sure I have a good landing second" kind of a guy.

"It shouldn't be a problem," he replied. "I was watching the news this afternoon and they kept showing cops and firefighters moving throughout the building. Obviously it's still structurally sound. I think there was more smoke damage than anything else."

"Alright, then," Mikey grunted. "Let's get this show on the road."

"As soon as the others get here we can go," Donnie replied.

"We're here," a voice said from directly behind them, and Donnie could only thank years of training for preventing him from jumping a foot in surprise. He hated it when Leo managed to sneak up on him, which was probably why his brother did it in the first place.

Sure enough, when he turned around, Leo had something very close to a smug look on his face, though he was obviously trying to hide it. Behind him, Raph was making no such attempt, grinning at them openly and twirling his sais around his fingers.

"Gees, guys…if we were the foot, you'd be missing your heads right now," he observed cockily.

"I knew you were there," Mikey replied dismissively, already twirling his grappling hook and eying the hole across the gap. "You kicked the edge of the eaves as you were coming over the side."

Raph snorted, crossing his arms over his chest. "Did not," he argued.

"Actually, Raph, you did," Leo stated. "I heard you as well."

"Can we just get going," Donnie interjected quickly, hoping to forestall the argument he knew was coming. At the same time he made a quick mental note to pay more attention next time they had stealth training…he couldn't afford to get sloppy.

"Alright," Leo's voice took on the no-nonsense tone that indicated he was in full-out leader mode. "As soon as we get inside we split up. Mikey and Raph take the bottom floor, and Donnie and I will take the third. We'll meet together on the second. Look for anything out of the ordinary, or anything that might give us some clue as to what Stockman was up to."

"We got it," Raph grumbled, pulling his own grappling hook from his belt.

Less than two minutes later and they were all standing inside the burned out building, the smell of wet ash filling their noses and tickling the backs of their throats. It was dark inside, with only the light drifting in from the lamp posts outside offering any kind of illumination. Still, they were used to the dim passageways of the underground sewers, and their eyes quickly adjusted enough that they could see.

Raph and Mikey split away from them, heading toward the narrow stairwell in the far corner of the room. Leo flashed a hand signal to Donnie indicating he should go left while Leo took the right. Donnie nodded his understanding, then set off.

It didn't take him long to realize that they wouldn't be finding much on this floor. The news had claimed the building was abandoned, and though they knew better, the third floor was certainly doing a good job of putting off that impression. It was mostly empty, with nothing but peeling wallpaper and a few random pieces of broken furniture. The fire seemed to have been the worst toward the south side of the building, and Donnie supposed some of the evidence they were looking for could have been burned up. Perhaps that had been the purpose of the fire all along; to get rid of evidence. Donnie somehow doubted it, though. There were definitely quieter, more subtle ways of getting rid of evidence, and as much as Stockman enjoyed the limelight, this wasn't exactly the kind of attention he would have been seeking.

Five minutes later he met up with Leo again and they silently made their way down to the second floor. Mikey and Raph were still nowhere to be seen, and Donnie hoped their absence indicated they were having better luck on the first floor then they'd had on the third.

A preliminary sweep of the second floor showed much the same as what they had encountered above, and Donnie was beginning to wonder if this all was going to turn out to be a big waste of time. After all, surely any evidence that Stockman had left would have been found and removed by the police already. The chances of them finding anything of interest were incredibly slim. Then again, if Stockman _had _been using this building as a secret hideout or lab, then he certainly wasn't going to just leave his stuff lying around for anyone to find…

A sudden idea struck him, and he began looking around the building with new eyes. It didn't take him long to find what he was looking for, and he let out another low whistle. Almost instantly Leo was at his side, his body tense and one hand twisted behind his back to grab the hilt of one of his swords.

"What is it?" he asked softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Does something about this room look off to you?" Donnie replied, staring at the far wall intently.

Leo let out a low grunt, pausing a moment to look around before replying. "No, not really." His hand dropped from his weapon and he gave Donnie a searching look. "Why? What are you thinking?"

"The dimensions are all wrong," Donnie answered immediately. It doesn't take up the whole width of the building, and yet there are no hallways or doorways that would indicate rooms beyond. But there has to be _something_ in that space. It's much too big to be just a crawl space or a dead area."

"So… secret room?" Leo asked, eying the far wall critically.

Donnie shrugged. "Only one way to find out…"

They moved forward together, each starting at a different end of the wall, running their hands up and down the smooth surface in search of anything that might indicate a hidden doorway. They were only a few seconds into their search when Raphael and Mikey joined them.

"Any particular reason you're feeling up that poor wall?" Raph commented dryly as he walked into the room.

"Donnie thinks there may be a hidden room behind it," Leo answered simply, never pausing in his slow search.

"We found nothing on the first floor," Mikey reported. "Well, unless you count a lot of empty boxes and dead mice."

"Same story up above," Donnie reported, then grunted as his searching fingers brushed across a sudden rough spot on the wall. He prodded at the area with his fingers, squinting in the dim light in an effort to see what it was he had found. A moment later he felt the wall shift beneath his hands, and he pressed harder, feeling a flash of triumph as a whole section gave way beneath his touch, swinging inwards and to one side to reveal a gap about the shape and size of a doorway. "Found it," he called.

Donnie started forward, only to be brought to a sudden halt by Leo's hand on his shoulder. He glanced toward his brother in surprise, but Leo merely put a single finger to his lips to indicate silence, then reached back and soundlessly unsheathed one of his swords. Donnie hesitated, then nodded, reaching over his own shoulder and pulling his bo free from its holder. He highly doubted that anyone would still be hiding out in the secret room, but still, it was better to be safe than sorry. Leo's tendency toward over-caution had saved their shells on more than one occasion, so Donnie wasn't about to argue.

He slowly crept forward, his staff clutched before him, the darkness growing as the meager light from behind him faded away. He paused, causing Leo to bump lightly into the back of his shell. It would be stupid to blindly stumble ahead into the unknown. The total lack of light was enough to tell him the room in front of him had no windows, which meant it would be safe to use his flashlight.

"Donnie?" Leo's voice was questioning.

"Hold on," Donnie whispered back, quickly pulling his backpack from his shoulder and fishing around in it until he found his flashlight. Taking a deep breath, he flipped it on, its narrow beam cutting through the inky darkness in front of him. He knew if anyone _was _in the room the flashlight would act like a beacon, leading them straight to him, but there was no point in continuing on blindly.

He made a quick scan of the room with his flashlight, then repeated the sweep, only this time slower. The room in front of them was definitely a lab of some sort, complete with a metal exam table and other research paraphernalia. Truthfully, it looked a lot like Donnie's own lab at home, but for one glaring exception that was impossible to miss. Behind him he heard Leo let out a small sigh, and he knew his brother had seen it too.

"Definitely not puppies and kittens," Leo murmured softly.

Donnie had no idea what his brother was talking about, but he didn't bother to ask, all his attention focused on the five giant cages that lined the walls of the lab. The cages ran from floor to ceiling, each roughly seven feet wide by eight feet deep. All of them were empty, the doors standing open, some of them looking bent and twisted, hanging loosely from their hinges.

"Uhh, we going to be moving forward anytime soon, Donnie, or should I just go ahead and take a nap?" Raph's disgruntled voice sounded from the passageway behind him.

Donnie did another quick scan of the room, this time looking for any surveillance cameras or other kinds of security. Fining none, he stepped the rest of the way into the room, allowing his brothers to enter behind him. Now that he knew the room was empty, he replaced his staff back in its holder on his shell.

Raph let out a low whistle as he entered the room and caught sight of the cages. "I wonder what Stockman was keeping in those," he exclaimed quietly.

"Nothing good," Leo replied with certainty, re-sheathing his own weapon. "Okay, let's take a look around. Mikey, stand guard at the door…I don't want to get caught unaware if someone comes."

"Ah man," Mikey grumbled at his assignment. "Why don't I ever get to have any fun?"

"Because it's a lab," Raph replied briskly, "and you and labs don't mix very well. Why do you think Donnie's banned you from his?"

Mikey's muttered response was lost to Donnie as he moved away across the room, having spotted a set of gray filing cabinets. As soon as he reached them he placed his flashlight on the floor, the beam facing up toward the ceiling so as to provide at least a little light for his brothers. He pulled open the top drawer, disappointed to find it empty. The rest were likewise empty, except for the last. When he opened that one, he found several thick manila files stuffed inside.

"Jackpot," he muttered. He reached in and began pulling the files out, stuffing them into his backpack. He was tempted to open one up and just start reading here and now, but he refrained. Once he was safely back at the lair he would have all the time he needed to thoroughly peruse the files at his leisure.

Once he had gotten all the files safely stashed away in his bag, he turned and grabbed the light, sweeping it around the room in search of his brothers. Raph was over by one of the cages, examining the thick metal bars and peering into its dark interior. Leo was across the room, down on one knee as he reached for something back behind a large cabinet. Donnie could see that the front of the cabinet had been smashed open, and whatever contents it had once held were now gone. For some reason, that made him feel uneasy.

Leo suddenly straightened, pulling his arm back out from behind the cabinet. Donnie could see that his brother held a thick metal cylinder in his hand, a dim red light blinking dully from its top.

Curious, Donnie headed toward his brother, but Mikey's sudden whisper stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Guys… someone's coming."

For a split second they all stood frozen, and then as one they made a beeline for the doorway. Donnie saw Leo slip the cylinder into his belt, then motion toward him to turn off the flash light. Donnie quickly complied, and the room was plunged into darkness.

"Hurry." Mikey's voice drifted softly through the darkness. Donnie used the sound to guide him back to the door, arriving at the same time as Leo and Raph. They squeezed back through the opening, Leo bringing up the rear. Donnie heard a slight scraping sound and knew his brother was pulling the false wall closed behind them.

Now that they were back out in the main room, they were able to see better, the lights from the street lamps outside filtering in through the windows. Donnie immediately made out the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs, and the dim glow of a flashlight beam danced across the walls.

Donnie felt Leo's hand close around his arm, and he glanced toward his brother. Leo quickly pointed up, then away, signifying it was time to go. Donnie nodded his understanding, feeling disappointed. He would have liked to have gotten a better look at the lab. He supposed they could always try to come back later if they needed to, but he highly doubted Shredder would risk leaving any evidence sitting around unattended for too long. He would likely send his Foot to come and clean the place out sooner rather than later. Donnie could only hope that the files he had managed to grab would give them enough information to figure out what Stockman had been up to.

Moving silently as shadows, they made their way back up to the third floor, easily skirting the slightly spooked looking cop who was patrolling the damaged building. They left as silently as they had come, swinging across to the adjoining building, and then freeing their grappling hooks with practiced flicks of their wrists.

Now that they were out of the building, Donnie turned to ask Leo about the cylinder he had found, but before he could say anything he saw his brother suddenly stiffen, his gaze locked on the heavy shadows on the far end of the roof.

"Heads up, guys," Leo said quietly. "We've got company."

Donnie turned smoothly, his staff in his hands before he was even consciously aware of it, his body sinking into a fighting stance. Beside him his brothers mirrored his movements, the low hiss of Leo's kantanas leaving their sheaths the only sound in the suddenly still night.

For a heartbeat nothing happened, then suddenly the shadows on the far side of the roof shifted and several Foot soldiers stepped into view. A moment later even more appeared on the left, and then the right side of the roof, forming a loose half circle around them.

Donnie let out a low sigh, tightening his grip on his staff. It looked like Shredder's clean-up crew had arrived, just as he had suspected they would.

Sometime he hated being right all the time.

* * *

It was about time!

Raphael had been craving a good fight for a while now, and it looked like he was finally going to get his wish. An eager smile curled up the corners of his mouth as he set his sais spinning around his fingers, his gaze sweeping over the ring of Foot soldiers surrounding them. "Howdy fellas," he called out boldly. "Glad you could make it to the party."

"You should not be here." Karai stepped from the shadows on the far side of the roof. Her stance was relaxed, her sword still sheathed at her side, but she still radiated an air of danger.

"Karai," Leo greeted coolly, his swords held at the ready.

"What is it with you turtles and always sticking your noses where they don't belong," Karai growled, irritated. "Didn't that rat father of yours teach you how to mind your own business?"

"This city _is_ our business," Leo replied firmly. "When one of Shredder's lackeys blows up a building, you'd better believe we're going to get involved."

Karai let out a harsh snort that wasn't at all ladylike. "You _do_ like to play the hero, don't you, Leonardo."

"Enough talk," Raph broke in, shaking his head in annoyance. Whenever Karai and Leo faced off, it was suddenly as though the rest of them no longer existed. They would stand and throw words at each other all night long if he didn't intervene. It was a crazy dance he had witnessed one too many times, and wasn't really in the mood for tonight. He knew his older brother had some complicated, screwed-up feelings toward Karai, but that didn't change the fact that she was their enemy. Given the chance she wouldn't hesitate to kill them, because that was what the Shredder had commanded her to do. Maybe she would regret it later, maybe not, Raph didn't really care. His job was to make sure she never got the chance.

"Fine," Karai hissed, her sword leaving its sheath in one fluid motion. "Have it your way…Foot, attack!"

Now this was more like it! Raph felt his adrenaline sing within his veins as he prepared to meet the oncoming rush. Maybe it was the warrior blood that Splinter said ran through all of their veins, or maybe he was just crazy like Donnie claimed, but he never felt more alive than when he was facing death. It was like a kind of high for him, and he reveled in the sudden rush of blood through his veins and the coiled tension in his muscles. Training in the dojo was fine, but it couldn't compare to the real deal…a chance to put into practice all he had learned and to test his skills.

To his right, Mikey let out a high pitched war cry, leaping forward at the ninjas closing in from that side, his nunchucks a mad whirl about his head and shoulders. On his left, Donnie was twirling his bo in front of him, the staff letting out a low hum as it picked up speed, soon spinning so fast as to be nearly invisible. And of course, Leo was heading straight for Karai, his face a mask of determination. This left Raph to deal with the Foot coming at them from the front, something he was more than ready to do.

He met the first two ninjas with a high sweeping kick that sent them both stumbling backwards in an attempt to avoid the blow. Before they could recover and regain their balance, he descended on them with a flurry of slashes and punches. The hilt of his sai smashed into the side of the first ninja's head, sending him crashing to the ground, while a lightening quick series of punches soon sent the second one down on top of his companion. They were immediately replaced by three more, and Raph met them with a grin, taunting them forward with a flick of his sai and a curl of his fingers.

Anyone who watched Raph in battle would probably believe that he was a mindless fighter, throwing himself at his enemies without care or regard. And yet while there _was_ a sort of recklessness to his fighting style, there was also an intense focus, not just on the opponents in front of him, but also on the battle in general. Even in the thick of a fight he always had a basic idea where each of his brothers were and how they were fairing. All it would take was the smallest grunt or gasp of pain, and he would be by their side in an instant, ready to defend.

Mikey was the easiest of his brothers to keep track of, mostly because he was the loudest. If he wasn't letting out random war cries, then he was taunting his enemies with insults and critiques on their fighting style. Donnie, on the other hand, fought quietly, and so Raph had learned to recognize the telltale thump of his brother's staff against his opponents' bodies as a way of locating him. Leo was usually pretty easy to find as well by the ring of his blades, but if that failed, Raph could always look for where their enemies were the most numerous or strongest, and his big brother would inevitably be there.

Tonight, Raphael wasn't feeling overly concerned. They were certainly outnumbered, but the odds against them weren't any worse than they had faced many times before and still come out on top. The soldiers of the Foot were fairly decent fighters by general standards, but they were nowhere near the level of the turtles in terms of skill and technique. The sheer number of them made up for some of the gap, but not enough. Raph downed one after the other with barely a pause in between, the wild grin never leaving his face.

Somewhere behind him the persistent ring of steel on steel told him Leo's dual with Karai was still going strong. Karai was different from the Foot. She had been raised in the art of ninjitsu the same as them, and was much more skilled than the soldiers she led. Still, he wasn't overly concerned, confident that his brother could best her.

"Coming at you, Raph," Mikey's voice suddenly called out, and Raph immediately spun, ducking low as a body sailed through the space he had just been to crash into a group of ninjas who had been trying to sneak up on him from the side.

"Thanks, Mike," Raph called over his shoulder, even as he dropped down on one hand and swept his body around in an arc, taking the legs out from under two more ninjas rushing for him. He regained his feet an instant later and looked around for his next opponent. Only a few Foot soldiers still remained standing, and they had all retreated to the edges of the roof, seemingly suddenly reluctant to attack.

Raph shook his head. '_Cowards,_' he thought disgustedly.

Ignoring them for the moment, he turned and observed the fierce battle still raging between Leo and Karai. The two were engaged in a quick and graceful dance, swords moving so fast they were almost a blur as they slashed, parried, and weaved their way across the rooftop. It was an impressive show, and Raph found himself mesmerized in spite of himself. He had only fought Karai once, and she had very nearly taken his arm off. He still bore the scar. She was a formidable adversary, quick and light on her feet, and a lot stronger than she appeared. Yet Leo was every bit as quick, despite his bigger size, and met her strike for strike. Neither one of them were giving an inch, and Raph could see the concentration etched on both their faces.

"Too bad we don't have any popcorn," Mikey commented, coming up to stand at Raph's shoulder and observing the fight alongside him. "Do you care to make a bet whether the rest of these guys are going to stay and play, or run home to momma?"

"Uhh, I wouldn't speak too soon, Mikey," Donnie observed, coming up to stand on Raph's other side. "I'm guessing they're just holding back until their reinforcements arrive."

Raph tore his gaze from the battle to arch an eye ridge at his purple-banded brother. "What reinforcements?" he asked with a frown.

"Those reinforcements," Donnie replied succinctly, pointing his staff north. Raph looked where his brother was indicating, his heart speeding up in his chest as he saw a small army of Foot sweeping across the rooftops in their direction. They were still a distance away, but closing in fast, and Raph could see several of Shredder's Elites leading the charge.

"Uhh, Leo?" Mikey called out hesitantly. "I don't want to ruin your concentration or anything, bro, but we've got some Funny Hats heading this way, and they brought back-up. Lots of back-up."

Leo grunted his acknowledgement, never pausing in his deadly dance with Karai. "I don't suppose you guys would leave now if I told you to?" he growled, sweeping one sword up to block a strike aimed at his throat.

"No."

Raph grinned at the triple echo of the word. Really, it was a stupid question on his brother's part.

"Thought so," Leo grunted resignedly. He suddenly pivoted to one side, sweeping Karai's sword out wide before striking out with a side kick, his foot landing in the center of Karai's chest, sending her careening back across the roof, her sword flying from her hand. Instead of moving in to finish her, Leo turned and bounded across the roof to where Raph and the others stood. "Time to go, guys," he called out, sounding slightly winded.

Raph hesitated, hating the thought of running from any fight. But the arrival of the Elites definitely changed things, shifting the odds in favor of their enemies. It just wasn't worth the risk, as much as it galled him to retreat.

He turned and followed his brothers to the edge of the roof, leaping down and catching himself on the nearby fire-escape. Above him he could hear Karai screaming at the remaining Foot soldiers to go after them. She really shouldn't have bothered…they stood absolutely no chance of catching them.

Landing lightly in the alleyway, he took off after his brothers, thinking that all in all, the night hadn't turned out half bad.

* * *

On a rooftop less than a quarter of a mile away, five shadows crouched low against a stone balustrade, glowing red eyes fixed on the street below. They had witnessed the battle on the rooftop, and now they watched as the four turtles easily evaded their pursuers and dropped down into a manhole, disappearing into the sewers below.

"They are like us, Alpha," came a growled comment, the voice harsh and rough as it broke through the stillness of the night.

"Indeed." Came the quiet response. "We must find out more about who they are and where they came from. Follow them, Viz. Take Two-Toes with you. Learn what you can, but stay back and make sure you are not seen."

"Yes, Alpha."

Two of the shadows immediately straightened from their crouch, their massive forms blending into the darkness of the night as they jumped from the edge of the roof and began making their way down toward the alleyway below, moving with lethal power and grace. Once they reached the ground, a gray furred muzzle lifted high into the air, sniffing the breeze experimentally until it found the scent it was looking for. Then it took off toward the mouth of the alley, its companion hot on its heels, the soft click of claws against the hard ground the only sound breaking the silence of the night.

TBC

_Well, what do you think? Let me know if I should keep going..._


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N—First off, I want to give a huge THANK YOU to everyone who has responded to this story through reviews, follows, and favorites. You all are such an encouragement to me, and it was so nice to see a lot of familiar faces! Sorry for the wait, but hopefully this nice long chapter makes up for it._

_Also, a special thanks to **Americanpyscho** (who has several amazing stories you should go and check out) for helping me push through some writer's anxiety. You are the best!_

_Warning: Angst ahead…you have been warned. This chapter also includes some swearing. I usually try to avoid that, but Raphael wasn't cooperating. Nothing too bad, though._

* * *

"Woohoo! Are we good, or are we good!"

Mikey was still riding his post battle high, and after several minutes of silently trekking through the dark sewers, he couldn't hold back his exuberance any longer. He might not crave violence like Raphael, but that didn't mean he didn't enjoy a good smack-down once in a while to get the blood flowing and the adrenaline pumping. There was something darkly satisfying in seeing the fear and grudging respect in his opponents eyes as they did their very best to bring him down, only to fail time and time again. Sensei and Leo would probably tell him he was getting cocky, but Mikey didn't much care. It felt good to win, and that was all there was to it.

His exclamation earned him looks from both Raph and Leo, but one was smiling while the other was frowning.

"Does the word "stealth" mean anything to you, Mikey?" Leo admonished in a tone of forced patience.

"Ah, lighten up, Fearless," Raph growled, jumping to his defense. "We're deep in the sewers now…no one's going to hear him. Let him celebrate a bit."

"Oh yes, let's celebrate the fight we just ran from," Donnie grunted sardonically, earning him twin glares from Mikey and Raph.

"Dude, that is _not_ the fight I'm celebrating." Mikey huffed. "It's the fight _before _the fight we ran from that I'm celebrating."

"I see," Donnie replied neutrally. "The triumph before the failure. But doesn't the failure trump the triumph?"

"It wasn't failure!" Raph and Leo stated together, one adamantly and the other calmly. They turned to regard each other, frowning slightly, as though surprised to find themselves in a position of agreement for once.

"We accomplished what we came for," Leo continued firmly, "and that's all that matters."

Raph let out a deep sigh. "Yeah," he muttered reluctantly. "Still, I say we could have taken them..." His fingers reaching down to brush against the hilts of his sai, as though he were imagining the battle in his mind. "Maybe we _were_ too quick to run away…"

"Don't be stupid, Raph," Leo growled in exasperation. "There were at least four elites coming, and with Karai there as well, there's no way we could have won that fight. It just wasn't worth it."

Raph muttered something under his breath, but Mikey could tell from the set of his shoulders that his red-banded brother wasn't really arguing, merely putting on a token show of resistance. It he had truly believed the fight could be won, he would have resisted Leo's call to retreat from the start. It had happened before on more than one occasion, and rarely ended well.

They had all slowed their walk as they were talking, but now Leo picked up the pace again, moving quickly ahead of them. Still mumbling to himself, Raph followed after, leaving Mikey and Don to bring up the rear.

They walked on in silence for a few minutes before Mikey glanced back and noticed the troubled frown on Donnie's face. He fell back to walk beside his brother, bumping him lightly on the shoulder to get his attention. "Whacha thinking, Donnie?"

Donnie turned to look at him, his eyes distant and thoughtful. "Hmm? Oh, I was just thinking about those cages back in the lab," he muttered absently, rubbing at the side of his head in the way he did when lost in deep though.

"What about them?" Mikey pressed.

Donnie's brow furrowed in worry. "Well, frankly, how big they were. The bars on the cages were at least three inches thick."

Mikey shrugged. "Yeah, so?"

Don let out a patient sigh. "Mikey, the cage that holds the 250 pound gorilla at the zoo has bars only half that thick."

Mikey snorted, wondering not for the first time how Donnie fit all the seemingly endless facts he had acquired into that brain of his. For instance, the dimensions of the bars on the gorilla's cage at the zoo. Mikey hadn't even known the zoo _had _a gorilla. "Okay…" he stated slowly, wondering where his brother was going with this conversation.

Donnie let out another, not so patient, sigh. "The bars on the cages in the lab were all bent and twisted," he explained pointedly, "which means whatever they held had to be either _very_ big or _very_ strong…or, worse case scenario, both."

"Big and strong, eh," Mikey repeated with a frown, feeling a slight chill crawl up his spine at his brother's words. "Just how strong are we talking here, Donnie?"

Donnie seemed to consider for a moment before giving a slight shrug. "How about 'snap us like a toothpick' strong?"

Mikey shuddered. "That sounds unpleasant."

"Yeah," Donnie agreed softly. "I'm just hoping that the files I got from the lab tell us what exactly we're dealing with…and better yet, how to bring it down if we have to."

"Preferably without getting snapped in half like a toothpick," Mikey grinned.

Donnie returned his smile, shaking his head ruefully. "Yeah, Mikey, preferably without getting snapped in half like a toothpick."

"Hey, maybe whatever was in the cages is friendly," Mikey suggested. "Just because it's big and strong doesn't mean it has to be mean. I mean, look at Leatherhead."

Donnie snorted. "Yeah right, when are we _ever_ that lucky, Mikey? And just so you know, I wouldn't exactly categorize Leatherhead as "nice." Especially not to his face…he might take exception to it."

Mikey smiled, "Yeah, you're probably right," he agreed, thinking of their large crocodilian friend. He missed Leatherhead. They didn't have a whole lot of friends, which made them cherish the ones they _did _find all that much more…even a cranky, mutated crocodile.

"We'd better hurry up and catch up to Raph and Leo," Donnie stated, and Mikey noticed for the first time that they had fallen quite a ways behind their brothers. Leo would be stopping soon to wait for them, and he probably wouldn't be too happy with the delay. His oldest brother was a pretty cool guy to hang out with most of the time, but when he was in full-out leader mode, he tended to become a little too serious. Mikey knew it had to do with "the burden of responsibility" as Master Splinter called it.

Mikey picked up his pace, Donnie right beside him, and a few minutes later the tunnel they were in suddenly opened up in front of them, spilling out into a large chamber with a giant bowl shaped depression dug into the center. It was a spill-off collection chamber, one of many scattered throughout the tunnels. A narrow walkway surrounded the wide basin, and various tunnels split off from the room at intermittent distances. Leo and Raph were standing toward the center of the room, bent over a round metal cylinder Leo held in one hand. Mikey could hear a faint beeping sound echoing around the room.

"What did you do?" Raph was demanding, arms folded across his chests. "Did you bump it or something?"

"I didn't do anything." Leo answered with a shake of his head. "It just started beeping."

Curious, Mikey was about to jump down from the walkway and make his way over to them when he heard Donnie let out a sharp gasp from beside him. He glanced back at his brother, pausing when he saw the look of horrified realization on Donnie's face.

"Leo!" Donnie cried out, his voice desperate. "Get away from it. Now!"

Mikey spun back around, watching as Leo reacted instantly to Donnie's panicked cry. With one hand, he reached out and shoved Raphael hard, knocking him back and away even as he raised his other hand and threw the cylinder with all his might. Mikey watched in fascination as the metal tube arched up and away, still emitting its high pitched beeping.

The cylinder was at the height of its arch when it exploded in a blinding flash of light.

Mikey didn't even have a chance to cry out before the shock wave of the blast threw him backward against the wall, the force of impact knocking all the air from his lungs. A horrible roaring sound filled his ears, and a thousand sparkling lights danced across his vision. Disoriented and confused, he stumbled forward onto one knee, his mind vaguely registering the crash of stone and brick all around him.

He opened his mouth to call out to his brothers, but never got the chance as something large and heavy slammed into the back of his head, driving him the rest of the way to the ground. He felt a brief flash of agonizing pain, and then…nothing.

* * *

Donnie woke up to Raph screaming in his face.

It wasn't exactly a pleasant way to wake up under any circumstances, and with the throbbing ache encompassing his entire body, he wanted nothing more than to ignore his brother and sink back into the comforting dark of oblivion. Unfortunately, Raph had other ideas.

"Donnie! Donnie, can you hear me? Wake up, dammit!"

He tried to tell his brother to go away, but apparently his throat and mouth weren't communicating very well at the moment and all he managed was a strangled moan. Raphael's response was to start to shake him. He wasn't being rough, but Donnie should definitely tell his brother that you don't shake someone who has just been in an explosion.

Wait…

Explosion?

His eyes flew open as memory returned to him, and he automatically tried to sit up, only to find that Raphael was holding his shoulders and keeping him pressed to the ground. His brother's face drifted in and out of focus above him, streaked with dirt and blood.

"Raph?" he gasped, then had to break off as he began to cough, the thick dust in the air aggravating the sensitive tissue at the back of his throat.

"Easy…take it easy, Donnie," Raph urged, his voice tight with worry. "How bad are you hurt?"

With effort Donnie brought his coughing under control, breathing shallowly to avoid another fit. "I was about…to ask you…the same thing." He gasped. Now that he could see his brother's face a little better, he could tell that Raph was having difficulty focusing on him, blinking constantly and rubbing at his eyes. A small cut high on his temple was responsible for the blood Donnie could see running down the side of his brother's face.

"I'm fine," Raph dismissed gruffly. "Just a little bruised and sore, but nothing worse than what I get after one of Sensei's special training sessions."

"What's wrong with your eyes?" Donnie pressed as Raph yet again rubbed the knuckles of one hand into his right eyes socket.

His brother grunted. "Not sure," he muttered. "I was looking straight at that canister when it exploded, and now I'm having trouble seeing a damn thing. I was only able to find_ you_ because you were groaning."

He'd been groaning?

Donnie frowned, quickly running a mental diagnostic on his body. He ached…a lot, but considering he had been slammed back against the wall of the tunnel by the explosion, that was hardly surprising. His left leg seemed to be throbbing the worst, but altogether he didn't think he was seriously injured.

"Help me sit up, please," he requested.

Raph hesitated for a moment, then gave in with a small sigh, his grip shifting from restraining to supporting as he pulled Donnie into a sitting position. Donnie couldn't hold back a soft hiss as his left leg flared with pain, and he blinked down at the limb worriedly. His knee looked badly swollen, the skin tight and hot and throbbing mercilessly. The injury was concerning, but not at all his biggest worry at the moment.

"Where are Mikey and Leo?" he asked worriedly, his heart sinking as he took in his surroundings. All around him was an unrecognizable landscape of broken rubble and scattered debris. The room looked…well, it looked as though a bomb had gone off in it. A good portion of the ceiling over the basin had collapsed, leaving a gaping hole above and mountains of ruble and shorn rock below. The occasional sound of falling debris and shifting rock still echoed through the room, and Donnie could make out the distinct splash of water coming from the far side of the basin. Judging from the dust still settling in the air around him, he guessed that he had only been unconscious for a few minutes at most.

Raph shook his head. "I don't know. I've been calling for them, but they haven't been answering."

Donnie felt his stomach sink at his brother's words, and he turned to look in the direction he had last seen Mikey. His eyes quickly skimmed over the piles of rubble until he spotted a green arm jutting out from a small pile of broken rock.

"There," he gasped, reaching out to grab Raph's arm, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest. "I see Mikey. He's about five yards to my left, and he's not moving."

Raph looked in the direction Donnie indicated, peering intently and blinking his eyes. "I think I see him," he finally grunted. He pushed himself to his feet, then reached down and grabbed Donnie's arm.

Donnie had just a second to try and prepare himself for what was coming before his brother was bodily hauling him to his feet. His leg screamed in protest, and he had to clench his teeth to keep from crying out. He wavered on his feet for a moment until Raph slung his arm over one of his shoulders and moved in to support him with an arm around his waist. Donnie clenched his jaw and fought against the dizziness and pain.

He felt Raph shift against him, bending down to grab something. When he straightened, Donnie saw that his brother had grabbed his backpack from the ground. Raph slung the strap of the bag over one shoulder, then began to move forward, half carrying Donnie along-side him.

"What the hell happened, Donnie?" Raph huffed as they made their way as quickly as possible through the rubble toward Mikey. "How'd you know that thing was about to explode?"

Donnie shook his head slightly. "I didn't," he replied roughly, leaning heavily against his brother and relieved to find that Raph seemed well enough to handle his weight. "Not until it was too late, anyway. It must have been a fail-safe device Stockman put on the canister…probably set to go off if it was taken a certain distance from the lab. Or maybe it was code activated…I don't know." He clenched his jaw, inwardly cursing himself for not taking a closer look at the cylinder as soon as he had the chance. "I didn't realize what it was until I heard the beeping," he admitted, "and even then, it was just a guess."

"Lucky guess," Raph grunted.

Donnie nodded, though at the moment he wasn't feeling like they had gotten off particularly lucky. Maybe if he had caught Leo just a few seconds sooner… Then again, there was the fact that the canister had exploded in the large room instead of in the narrow tunnels, where the blast would have likely killed them all instantly, so he supposed maybe they had gotten off lucky after all.

They finally reached Mikey's side, finding their brother lying face down amid a small pile of rubble, his eyes closed. He didn't move at all as Raph gently lowered Donnie to the ground beside him. Donnie reached out and felt along the side of Mikey's neck for a pulse, releasing a deep sigh of relief as he felt the strong thrum of life beneath his fingers. "He's alive," he reported softly, hearing Raph breath out his own relieved sigh from beside him.

"Mikey?" Donnie called softly, gently patting his brother's cheek in an effort to wake him. "Mikey! Come on bro, open your eyes."

There was no reply…not so much as a twitch or a groan. Donnie frowned in worry, his practiced gaze sweeping up and down his brother's form in search of injury. It looked like Mikey's shell had protected him from the majority of the falling debris, but he had a nasty bump and gash on the back of his skull which was steadily oozing a stream of blood down the back of his neck.

"How bad is he?" Raph asked, removing the pack from his shoulder and setting it down next to Donnie. He reached out and removed a couple of rocks from the back of Mikey's shell, casting them aside.

"I'm not sure yet," Donnie replied. "He has a nasty looking bump on the back of his head, but I'm going to have to do a more thorough check before I know the full extent of his injuries."

Raphael nodded grimly. "You think you can take care of Mikey on your own if I go and look for Leo?"

Donnie glanced over at him in surprise. "Are you sure you can see well enough?" he asked in concern.

Raph gave a tight nod. "Things are still a bit dim and fuzzy, but it's getting better. I'll deal."

Donnie hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "Okay then, go. I've got Mikey," he replied, feeling undeniably relieved. He had been trying hard not to think about the large slabs of concrete and rock filling the center of the basin where he had last seen Leo standing. His chest ached with worry for his oldest brother, and he knew the sooner they found him, the better.

Raph reached over and squeezed his shoulder briefly before rising and making his way cautiously toward the center of the room. Donnie watched him for a moment before turning his attention back to Mikey.

His throbbing leg made it difficult to maneuver, but he pushed his discomfort aside as he worked to inspect his brother's limp form. His examination wasn't as thorough as he would have liked, but after a few minutes he felt fairly confident that aside from some minor scrapes and bruises, Mikey didn't have any other serious injuries. He still showed no signs of returning to consciousness, though, which had Donnie concerned.

Pulling his backpack to him, he opened it and rooted around until he found his flashlight, praying it hadn't been damaged when he'd been slammed back against the ground. Thankfully it flickered to life when he pressed the button, and he leaned forward, peeling back one of Mikey's eyelids and shining the light into his brother's eye. The pupil was a little slow in contracting, but not terribly so. The other eye was a different matter, though. As soon as Donnie pulled back the lid, he could tell the pupil was blown, and when he shined the light into the eye, it barely showed any reaction at all.

Frowning in concern, Donnie used the light from the flashlight to inspect the wound on the back of his brother's head. It looked badly swollen and was still bleeding sluggishly, but it wasn't the external injury that Donnie was the most concerned about. He reached out and checked Mikey's pulse again, his frown deepening. It was a little too slow for his liking, and his brother's skin was cool and clammy beneath his fingers. He feared Mikey might be slipping into the beginning stages of shock. His brother obviously needed care that Donnie couldn't give him in their current situation. He needed to get him back to the lab, and soon.

With nothing else he could do for his brother at the moment, Donnie set about bandaging the gash on Mikey's head, using the supplies from the small first aid kit he kept in his backpack. It wasn't much, but it would slow the bleeding and help keep the wound clean.

He was in the process of securing the bandage with some medical tape when a booming crash sounded from somewhere on the far side of the room. He jerked in surprise at the noise, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. It sounded like a large chunk of rock had fallen from the damaged ceiling, and he prayed neither of his brothers had been anywhere near it when it came down. The whole room had been rendered structurally unsound by the blast, and Donnie feared it could collapse down around them at any moment. It was not a very comforting thought. The sooner they got out of here, the better

As if in direct answer to his thoughts, Raph suddenly appeared from behind a large slab of concrete, making his way quickly and purposefully back over to Donnie. As he drew closer, Donnie could make out the grim expression on his brother's face, and his gut began to churn with apprehension.

"I found him," Raph stated without preamble as soon as he drew near. "He's breathing, but unconscious, and he's trapped beneath a large slab of rock. I can't get him free, Donnie. I'm going to need your help."

Donnie nodded, his relief at hearing that Leo had been found tempered by the slightly panicked look Raph was trying desperately, but failing miserably, to hide.

"How bad…?" he started, but Raph cut him off with a harsh shake of his head.

"I don't know," he replied shortly. "Most of his body is hidden under the rock. We have to hurry, Donnie. This place isn't exactly stable, and to top it all off, I think the basin is beginning to fill with water."

Donnie's heart froze at that statement, his eyes widening in alarm. He could still hear the splash of water falling somewhere across the room, but suddenly the sound took on a much more ominous note. If the debris had managed to block off the drainage canal in the center of the basin, then the water would continue to rise until it found some other exit. The only other place the water could go was out the side tunnels, but by the time it reached that point, the basin…and anything in it…would be under several feet of water.

Raph glanced over at Mikey, his expression twisting into a worried scowl. "He hasn't woken up yet, eh?" he grunted. "Is he okay?"

Donnie closed his eyes, letting out a deep sigh, wishing he had a better report for his brother. "No, not really," he replied tiredly, opening his eyes and looking up at Raph. "He has a severe concussion…possibly even a cracked skull. His vital signs are dropping and I think he's going into shock."

He could tell from the expression on Raph's face that his brother hadn't been expecting such grim news. "Damn," Raph whispered hoarsely, staring down at his little brother worriedly. "Is it safe to leave him alone?"

"I'm not sure that we have much choice," Donnie replied resignedly. "He should be okay for a few minutes." It wasn't like there was much more Donnie could do for him here anyway. "Let's just hurry, okay? The sooner we get Leo and get out of here, the happier I'll be."

Raph grunted his agreement, reaching for Donnie's arm. "You and me both, brother. You and me both…"

* * *

Raph knew that Donnie was in a lot of pain, but his brother was doing an admirable job of pushing past it, hobbling along beside Raph, his face set in a mask of determination. Even so, Raph was still forced to carry much of his brother's weight, which concerned him. With three injured brothers, two of them unconscious, he was beginning to realize that the task of getting out of here was going to be a lot more difficult than he first thought. He was physically the strongest of his brothers, but even he couldn't carry all three of them at once. A little back-up would be nice, but a quick check of his phone earlier had told him there would be no call for help this time. They were too deep in the bowels of the earth, and their phones didn't get reception here. If they had been a little closer to the lair, where Donnie had set up a bunch of amplifiers, they would have been okay, but they were still too far away.

Knowing he was on his own, Raph couldn't help the growing sense of panic fluttering inside his chest. He and his brothers had been in tight situations before, but none quite like this. With the others all hurt, it fell to him to make sure they all got out okay. Their lives were literally in his hands, and he could only hope he wouldn't fail them. He suddenly had a deeper understanding of the burden of responsibility that Leo carried with him each and every day, and he promised himself that he would try to be a bit more understanding of their Leader from here on out.

The heavy crash of more falling debris to his right had him flinching unconsciously, tightening his hold on his little brother as he picked up his pace. "Sorry, Donnie," he grunted as his brother let out a low moan. "We have to hurry."

"I'm okay," Donnie gasped through clenched teeth. "Just keep going."

They pressed onward, the floor growing steadily wetter beneath their feet. By the time they reached the spot where he had found Leo, there was about an inch of water covering the floor. Raph wasn't very good with calculations, but he knew enough to know that they didn't have a whole lot of time before the basin completely filled with water.

Raph knew it as soon as Donnie spotted Leo because he suddenly stiffened against him, letting out a sharp gasp. Raph understood his brother's reaction, his own fear rising up to grip him just as it had when he had first found their brother. Leo was lying half buried beneath a giant slab of concrete angling down from the ruined ceiling, the sheer size of it making it a wonder that he hadn't been crushed instantly. The only thing that had saved him was a small jumble of debris beside him that was keeping the full weight of the slab from coming down on him. Even so, he was pinned firmly to the floor.

" Leo…" Donnie breathed, pulling away from Raph and collapsing down next to their brother, his own injuries temporarily forgotten.

To both their surprise, Leo's eyes fluttered open at the sound of Donnie's voice, blinking up at them blearily. Raph quickly knelt, reaching out and grabbing his brother's shoulder, relieved to see him awake. When he had found Leo earlier, he had been deeply unconscious, not responding to Raph at all, even when he had tried to pull him free from under the slab.

Leo's expression twisted with relief at the sight of them. "Thank god," he gasped as he looked between them. "I thought…" he trailed off, coughing weakly. Raph winced at the sound, noticing how rough and labored Leo's breathing was. He had noticed it before, but now it sounded even worse.

"Just relax, Leo," Donnie ordered, slipping into full doctor mode as he placed his fingers on the artery in Leo's neck, taking his pulse. "Can you tell me where you hurt?"

Leo's eyes closed and he sucked in several painful sounding breaths before opening them again and answering. "My chest," he whispered. "It hurts…to breathe."

Donnie bit his lip, nodding. "Anywhere else?" he asked. "How about your legs?"

Leo grimaced, his head shaking slightly. "I can't really… feel my legs," he replied, the fear in his voice unmistakable.

Raph met Donnie's eyes over Leo's prone form, a shiver of dread racing down his spine at his brother's words.

"It's okay," Donnie said hurriedly. "The weight from the rock could just be cutting off your circulation. Hold tight, Leo…we'll get you out and then I can examine you more thoroughly."

"Mikey…?" Leo gasped out, his worried eyes shifting back and forth between them. "Where…?

"He's not far," Raphael quickly reassured him. "He got hit on his head by some falling rock, but he should be fine." He cast a quick glance over at Donnie as he spoke, silently urging his brother to remain silent. For the time being it was better that Leo not know the full truth about Mikey's condition. It would only worry him, and right now there wasn't anything he could do about it.

Leo looked relieved at the news, relaxing slightly and letting his eyes slip closed.

"Stay with us, Leo," Donnie encouraged, reaching out and tapping his cheek gently. Leo obediently opened his eyes, his breath sawing in and out in painful pants that set Raph's teeth on edge.

"I'm still here," he breathed, seemingly unable to talk in anything above a strained whisper. "Wouldn't mind…getting this thing…off my chest, though."

Donnie looked up at the slab of rock, then over at Raph, his expression worried. Raph understood his brother's concern. The slab was at least fifteen feet long and three feet thick, meaning it was going to be freakin' heavy. To make matters worse, the way it was angled up to the ceiling was going to make moving it that much more difficult…and dangerous. If they jostled it too much, they might just end up bringing what was left of the ceiling down on top of them.

Still, they had no choice but to try. They were racing against the clock now, and it was anyone's guess what would get them first, the flooding basin or the collapsing ceiling. Raph hoped to be long gone before either of those scenarios played out.

"Donnie, get ready to pull him free when I lift," Raph ordered, rising and moving over to the rock slab, reaching down to grab the bottom edge. He waited until Donnie had maneuvered himself into place, then tensed his muscles, preparing to lift. "On three. One…two…three."

He bunched his muscles and hauled upward with all his strength, a strained grunt climbing from his throat as the edge of the rock bit deeply into the flesh of his hands. He had known the slab would be hard to move, but he was shocked when it refused to budge so much as an inch, no matter how hard he strained. After several long seconds he released the slab and took a small step back, panting from exertion, his muscles aching. He glared at the offending rock, took a deep breath, and attacked it once again, a cry of pure adrenaline fueled rage pulled from between his clenched teeth as he threw everything he had into lifting the slab off his brother. The result was exactly the same as before. No matter how much he strained and pulled, the rock refused to budge. He might as well have been trying to move a mountain.

"Raph…?" Donnie called out worriedly as he collapsed back a second time, gasping and cursing beneath his breath.

Raph glanced over at his two brothers, trying his hardest to hide his rising sense of panic. "I'm going to need your help, Donnie," he stated breathlessly, trying to keep his voice calm and steady. "This S.O.B is heavy."

Donnie was looking at him with wide eyes, but he slowly nodded, reaching down and grasping Leo's shoulder to get his attention. "I'm going to help Raph lift the slab," he explained quietly. "Do you think you can push yourself free when we do?"

Leo jerked his chin in a brief nod, sending the thin pool of water around his head rippling in small waves. "I'll try," he whispered, swallowing hard, his features ashen.

"You can do it, Leo," Raph encouraged, moving over to help haul Donnie to his feet for the third time. He helped his brother hobble over to the spot where he had been lifting, aware of Leo's eyes watching their every move. Raph carefully released his brother, allowing Donnie to balance on his good leg, one hand resting on the edge of the slab to help balance him.

"Let me know when you're ready, Don," he muttered, not wanting to rush his brother, who was in obvious pain, but feeling as though they were quickly running out of time.

Donnie shuffled around until he was facing the rock, bending down cautiously and gripping the edge just as Raph had previously done. "Let's do this," he growled, his voice rough from pain and effort. "Hurry, before I fall over."

Raph quickly resumed his previous position and made a quick count-off before hauling upward once more. He heard Donnie grunt in effort from beside him, the muscles in his brother's arms bulging as he strained upward. Raph's own muscles were so taught he felt as though they were about to burst from his skin. He threw everything he had and then more into pushing upward, uncaring of strained or torn muscles.

This time the rock slab shifted upward ever so slowly beneath their combined onslaught, and Raph felt a brief flash of triumph. It was short lived, however, as a grating crack suddenly sounded from directly above them, followed almost immediately by the rumble and clatter of falling stone.

Raph responded without thinking, releasing the slab and throwing himself at Donnie, tackling his brother over on top of Leo and then throwing himself over both of them as a shower of stones rained down on them from above. For a terrifying moment he thought that the entire ceiling…or what was left of it…was about to come down on them. He clenched his jaw and kept his head tucked low, wincing occasionally at the bruising impact of a fallen rock against the back of his shell. He had never been so grateful to be a turtle.

The rain of rocks seemed to last an eternity, the noise deafening as they crashed and shattered on the floor all around them. Eventually it ended, the sudden silence overwhelming after all the noise. Raph released the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding, straightening from his protective crouch over his brothers, relieved and a bit surprised that they had survived.

"You guys okay," he growled roughly, trying not to cough on the thick dust that filled the air. He reached out and helped Donnie up into a sitting position, noting his brother's pale features and tightly clenched jaw. The fall couldn't have done any favors to Donnie's injured leg. At least his brother had managed to twist his body sideways during the fall so as to land in a sort of protective curl around Leo's head verses slamming into him shell first. Raph winced when he realized the damage he might have inadvertently caused if it wasn't for Donnie's quick thinking. His reaction had been pure instinct, and he hadn't been thinking about how Donnie would land when he had pushed his brother over.

"I'm okay," Donnie breathed out, sounding slightly breathless, his hand clutching his upper thigh above his knee. "Leo?"

"I'm fine." Leo whispered, and if the situation hadn't been so serious, Raph might have laughed out loud at the absurdness of that statement. As it was, he didn't feel much like laughing…more like screaming in frustration. They had been so close!

The tiniest shift of the slab had nearly brought the remainder of the ceiling down on them. He couldn't help but wonder what would happen if they actually managed to lift it high enough to get Leo free? He was pretty sure he knew the answer, and the knowledge left him with a growing sense of helpless despair.

He glanced over at Donnie, who was staring up at the slab with an expression that Raph was fairly certain was mirrored on his own face. "Any ideas, Don," he asked breathlessly, having no clue as to what he should do next, but refusing to give up.

Donnie turned to look at him, his mouth opening, then just as quickly closing. For the first time that Raphael could remember, his genius brother looked to be at a complete loss. The idea that Donnie didn't know what to do any more than he did caused his heart to clench painfully inside his chest, his fear rising up once more.

"Guys…?"

Raph couldn't help but flinch at Leo's soft voice, the question in his brother's tone evident. He couldn't bring himself to look down at Leo, choosing instead to stare at the rock slab, trying desperately to shake away his fear and force his mind to come up with a plan…any plan.

It was Donnie who eventually answered Leo's unspoken question. "The rock you're trapped under runs all the way up to the ceiling," he explained quietly. "When we tried to move it, it caused more of the ceiling to collapse…" he trailed off, his voice tight.

"I see," Leo murmured softly. "So you can't move the slab…without bringing down…the ceiling," he summarized between strained gasps of air.

"We'll find a way," Raph growled roughly, still not looking at either of his brothers. There was no way he was going to give up now. There had to be something they could do…there _had_ to be. If only he could think!

Neither of his brothers spoke, and a long silence stretched between them, the only sound the distant splash of water. Normally Raph found the sound of water relaxing, but right now it held all the comfort of an executioner's boots climbing a wooden gallows. This executioner wasn't coming for him, though…it was coming for his brother, and Raph would do whatever he could to stand in its way.

He had no idea how many wasted minutes slipped by in silence, but when he felt a gentle brush of fingers against his wrist, he looked down in startled surprise. It was Leo's hand that he had felt, and he found his brother looking up at him, his expression carefully neutral, almost as though he was fighting hard to keep any form of emotion from his face.

"Raph…" Leo started, then paused, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath…or at least as deep a breath as he could with the slab pressing down on his chest.

Raph watched him worriedly, leaning closer so his brother wouldn't have to strain in order to be heard. "Yeah, Leo?"

Leo's eyes slipped open once again, and for a brief moment Raph caught a myriad of emotions swimming in their blue depths…fear, pain, sadness, determination. Then they were gone, and Leo's face became as expressionless as before. "Go," he ordered softly, his voice barely audible over the splash of water. "There's nothing more you can do. It's not safe here. Get Donnie and Mikey…and get out. "

His brother's words shouldn't have surprised him. This was Leo, after all, and Raphael really should have been expecting something like this. Even so, they hit him like a physical blow, robbing his breath and stilling his heart. He stared down at Leo in rising disbelief, all the despair and hopelessness of a moment earlier forgotten, replaced almost instantly by anger. He could feel his body trembling slightly with the force of it. Here he was fighting to find a way to save his brother, and Leo was ready to give up. Just like that. To lie down and die. And of course, like a good little soldier, he expected Raph to go right along with his plan. Well, screw that!

"Shut up," he growled roughly, yanking his hand none too gently away from his brother's touch.

Leo's gaze turned pleading. "Raph…" he started again, but Raphael didn't give him a chance to finish.

"I said shut up!" he shouted, his anger flowering into full out wrath. He was aware of Donnie sitting beside him, pale faced and wide eyed, but at the moment his entire focus was on Leo. He felt his hands clench into fists at his side as he glared down at his brother. How dare Leo ask such a thing of him! How dare he! Did his brother honestly think that was even an option? Did he honestly believe that Raph could just walk away and leave him? Leave him to drown or to be crushed? The very thought was enough to make his blood boil, and if Leo hadn't been so seriously hurt, Raph was pretty sure he would have punched him in that moment.

"You can't save me, Raph…"

With a roar Raphael was on his feet, turning his back on his brother as he lunged for the rock slab. He bent over and grabbed the edge, heaving upward with all the rage and frustration he could feel flowing through his veins like fire, suddenly uncaring of the possible consequences. Just as before, the rock refused to budge, and something inside of Raph snapped. He drew out his sais and began to attack the slab with abandon, an animalistic growl pulled from his throat, shards of broken rock flying away from the tips of his blades. Distantly he heard his brothers crying out at him to stop, but he ignored them, desperately needing an outlet for his helpless rage.

'_Damn Leo_,' he thought furiously. _'Damn him and his stupid need to play the martyr!' _

He was unsure how long he stood there, beating away uselessly at the rock, his rage burning through him like a wildfire, when suddenly he felt a hand grip his shoulder. He jerked away from the touch, whirling around, his sais still clenched tightly in his fists. Donnie stood swaying before him, his expression haggard and worn, his breath coming in harsh gasps. "Raph, you have to stop," he whispered brokenly, his eyes shining brightly with unshed tears. "Please…"

Donnie's legs suddenly buckled, and Raph instinctively reached out to catch his brother as he fell, pulling Donnie against his chest. The weight of his brother seemed to drive the anger right from him, the blind rage disappearing just as quickly as it had come, leaving him feeling empty and hollow.

"Oh god, Donnie," he whispered, clutching his brother to him tightly, the realization of what he had almost done finally hitting home.

His gaze moving over to land on Leo, and he found his older brother staring at him with wide eyes, one hand stretched out in his direction, as though he had been trying vainly to reach for him. Leo's face was lined with pain, though whether it was physical or merely in response to Raph's violent reaction, he didn't know.

Raph slowly sank back down to the ground, taking Donnie with him. He replaced his sais in his belt, then reached out and grabbed Leo's outstretched hand in his own, gripping it tightly. So many emotions warred within him that he was having difficulty telling one from the other. All he knew was that he had never felt so helpless and inadequate in his entire life.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, their labored panting the only other noise aside from the continual splash of water. Raphael could feel the wetness around his legs, chilling and inescapable, rising slowly but steadily.

It was Donnie who finally broke the silence, pushing himself away from Raph's supporting arm. "We need to check on Mikey," he muttered quietly, his eyes downcast. "He's been alone for too long…"

Raph let out a deep sigh, nodding his head slowly. "I'll do it," he stated numbly, releasing his hold on both of his brothers and pushing himself to his feet. "Stay here with Leo. I'll be back in a minute."

He was unable to look at either of them as he slowly walked away. He felt like he was in some kind of trance, his body moving of its own violation, but his mind refusing to work properly. Checking on Mikey gave him something to do, a momentary purpose to combat the feelings of uselessness clawing at his chest, but he knew the escape was only temporary. Leo's words kept echoing around and around inside his head, and try as he might, he couldn't silence them.

He found Mikey lying exactly as they had left him, his stillness strange and unnatural. Mikey was _never _still…not even when he was sleeping. His brother's constant movement and boundless energy had always been a source of annoyance to Raph, but right at the moment he would have welcomed it gladly. It physically hurt to see him lying so still and lifeless.

"Hey there, bro," Raph greeted quietly, kneeling next to his brother and reaching out one hand to touch the side of Mikey's face. He was immediately aware of how cool and clammy his brother skin felt to his touch He was no medical expert, but he had learned enough from watching Donnie to know immediately that Mikey wasn't doing too well. His skin had a pale, unnatural pallor to it, and when Raph took his pulse he found it to be far too thready and weak.

"Ah, Mikey," he whispered softly, staring down at his brother helplessly.

The realization that his little brother was dying hit him like a punch to the gut. Donnie had said it was bad, but a part of Raph hadn't wanted to believe it. This was Mikey they were talking about after all. Their youngest brother had so much life and energy in him, it seemed impossible that he could slip away from them so quietly. And yet that was exactly what was happening. Without proper medical care…care he could only receive back at the lair, Mikey would continue to fade away until there was no hope of bringing him back. Raph had no idea how much time his little brother had left, but he knew it wasn't long. Already they could be too late…

He bowed his head, feeling as though a great weight was settling on his shoulders, pressing down on him and making it difficult to breathe. He wanted to gather Mikey up in his arms, but was afraid to accidently hurt his brother further. The realization that he was on the cusp of losing two brothers was enough to make him want to scream in anguish. How much more could he take? He felt on the verge of shattering into a million pieces. He was failing his brothers, and that knowledge cut him deeper than any blade, tearing into his soul and leaving it raw and exposed. He didn't know what to do and found himself desperately wishing that this was all some horrible nightmare…that he would wake up to find his family whole and safe back at the lair.

But the truth wasn't that easy to escape.

"Hold on, Mikey," Raph whispered brokenly, running his hand gently across his brother's brow. "Just please…hold on."

There was no response, just as he had known there wouldn't be. Feeling heavier than he had ever felt in his life, Raph rose and made his slow way back toward where Donnie and Leo waited. The water in the basin had risen even more, splashing about his ankles, and sending a chill that had nothing to do with the cold throughout his entire body. With every step the ache in his chest grew until he wanted to rip it out and cast it aside, just so he could escape the pain.

He slowed his pace as he neared his brothers, suddenly reluctant to approach, not knowing what he would tell them. Leo was talking softly to Donnie, who had his head bowed, his shoulders shaking silently as he wept. The image was almost too much for Raph, who had the sudden urge to turn and flee…to somehow escape the horror that was before him…to run and never stop. His steps slowed to a halt, and he stood there frozen, barely able to breathe.

Leo must have sensed his presence, because he turned his head to look over at him. His brother's gaze locked with his, and Raphael felt something twist deep in his gut. He forced his feet to stumble forward the last few yards, sinking down to his knees in the cool water. Donnie never looked up at his arrival, his head bowed and his shoulders hunched.

"Mikey?" Leo asked softly, his worried eyes traveling over Raph's face, undoubtedly picking up on his distress.

A part of Raph wanted to lie to his brother as he had before…to tell him that Mikey was fine. He couldn't bring himself to do it, though. Leo deserved to know the truth, and Raph knew he couldn't hide it from him any longer

"He…he's not good," he replied slowly, his voice sounding hoarse and foreign even to his own ears. "I think his body's gone into shock." He paused, swallowing hard and forcing his eyes to meet Leo's. "He needs help…soon."

Leo looked at him steadily for a moment, then closed his eyes, breathing out Mikey's name softly.

"I don't know what to do, Leo." The words came out of Raph's mouth before he could stop them, full of all the hopelessness and despair that were currently tearing him slowly apart from the inside out. "I don't know what to do," he repeated, his head bowing and his eyes closing.

He felt his brother's hand close around his, squeezing tightly. "Raphael," Leo said softly, the rare use of his full name causing him to open his eyes and look down at his brother. Leo's gaze caught and held his own, understanding and compassion mixing with a fiery light of determination burning deep in their depths. "Save Mikey," his brother whispered gently, but with a firm undertone that made it clear he was giving an order, not a request. "Save Donnie. They're your responsibility now, and you have to get them out of here."

"I can't just leave you, Leo," Raph replied, cold fingers of terror gripping his heart at even the thought. "I can't!"

"You can't save me, Raph," Leo repeated his earlier words, his voice so soft that Raph had to strain to hear him.

Raph ducked his head, staring at a spot on Leo's shoulder, unable to bring himself to reply. He knew his brother was right, and that knowledge brought pain like he had never known. His throat felt hot and tight, and he could feel the betraying sting of tears on his face. Mikey and Leo. Their faces filled his mind's eye, not as they were now, broken and dying, but alive and vibrant. One he could not save, and the other he could only save by abandoning the first. It was an impossible choice, and one he did not think he had the strength to make.

Leo's grip on his hand tightened, and his brother whispered his name, forcing Raph to lift his gaze to look at him once more. "Please Raph," Leo breathed softly. "The longer you stay, the worse Mikey will get. You have to go…now."

A broken sob sounded from the direction where Donnie was sitting, but Raph couldn't tear his gaze away from Leo to look at his other brother. He thought the pain in his chest had been bad before, but now he wasn't sure if his heart was even beating. He wasn't sure he wanted it to.

"Please…" Leo repeated, his steady gaze never wavering from Raph.

Raph had no idea how he found the strength to do it, but he finally gave his brother a slow nod, accepting the final command from his leader and best friend. As he did, he felt something die inside of him, and he knew he would never be the same again. A cold chill settled slowly over him, blanketing all thought and feeling in a tight cocoon of numbness.

Leo closed his eyes, letting out a deep sigh of relief. "Thank you," he whispered softly, his hand gripping Raph's tighter than ever before releasing him. "Can you…get one of my swords for me?" he asked quietly.

Raph let out a shaky breath, then nodded, reaching over his brother's shoulder to grasp the hilt of one of Leo's swords. It wasn't easy to pull the weapon free, the blade trapped beneath the ground and Leo's shell, but eventually Raph managed to pry it lose. He held the sword out to his brother, who took it with a quiet thanks, his eyes closing as he clutched the blade to his chest. It almost seemed as though he was drawing comfort from the cold steel, his hand gripping the familiar hilt in a white-knuckled fist. After a few moments he opened his eyes, looking up at Raph for a long second before offering the sword back.

"Can you take this to Master Splinter for me?" he asked softly. "Tell him…tell him I said thank you…for everything." For the first time Leo's composure slipped, and Raph got a glimpse of the fear and sadness his brother was struggling so hard to hide. A single tear slipped from the corner of Leo's eye, and Raph watched it track a path down his brother's temple until it disappeared into the pool of water pillowing his brother's head.

"I will," Raph promised, taking the sword slowly. He wondered vaguely why he wasn't crying himself. Why he wasn't screaming and shaking with the force of his grief and loss. He had never before felt such agony and sorrow as he did now, but for some reason the emotions couldn't seem to break free from the numbness that had taken over his entire body. It was as though he was an outside observer of some tragic drama, feeling the emotions, but somehow separated from it all.

"Donnie," Leo called softly, and instantly their purple-banded brother was there, reaching out to grasp Leo's other hand, his face a mask of grief. "Take care of Mikey," Leo ordered him softly. "Tell him…tell him I said to never change, okay?"

Donnie nodded, obviously too overcome to answer, his head bowing to rest on Leo's shoulder, his whole frame shaking with the force of his sobs.

Leo leaned his cheek against the top of Donnie's head, his own grief surfacing once more in the tears cascading down his face. "I love you Donnie," he whispered brokenly, his words only causing Donnie to weep harder.

Leo's gaze shifted over to Raph once more, and as he murmured the same words he had just said to Donnie, Raph felt the numbness that had encased him waver. He knew in that moment that if he didn't get away now, he wouldn't have the strength to leave.

Quickly leaning forward, he rested his forehead briefly against Leo's. "I love you too, bro," he choked, the words barely making it out past the tightness in his throat. "And I'm sorry…I'm so sorry."

Then Raph was drawing back, rising shakily to his feet and moving over to Donnie. He reached down to help pull his brother up, and for a moment Donnie resisted him, clinging to Leo's shoulder like someone drowning. Then Leo whispered something that Raph couldn't hear, and Donnie released him, allowing himself to be pulled upright.

Time seemed to freeze as Raph stood there, looking down at his brother who was now half-way submerged in the rising water. There was so much he wanted to say, and yet no time to say it in. Leo's life was now measured in a matter of minutes, and Raph was leaving him to die helpless and alone. That realization hurt worse than anything Raph had ever experienced, a pain buried so deeply in his heart that he knew he would never be rid of it. He felt himself falter, uncertain if he could bring himself to go through with it.

"Go," Leo ordered softly, his tears still staining his face, but a look of calm acceptance settling over his features. "Take care of them, Raph, and don't look back. Never look back."

Raph nodded once, and then tore his gaze from Leo, pressing Donnie to his side and moving determinedly away. Just as Leo had asked, he didn't look back as he crossed the room, knowing if he did, the numbness would be gone and he would shatter into a million pieces. He couldn't let that happen. He had two brothers he needed to save and a promise he had to keep.

His grip tightened on the hilt of the sword he still carried, and from it he pulled the strength to keep walking, even as each step tore a hole into the very center of his being.

For Leo…he would do this for Leo.

TBC

_Yikes. That was intense. Please don't hate me. This chapter was an extreme challenge for me, so thoughts and comments would be SO appreciated!_


	3. Chapter 3

_You all are awesome! That is all I have to say. Totally AWESOME!_

_**sav**__—You are too sweet. What an incredibly nice thing to say! I am so glad you are enjoying the story._

_**LazyPanther**__—So sorry for ruining your day…and your makeup. The next couple of chapters are a little heavy on the angst side as well, but I promise more action and adventure soon. I also promise that there will be a rainbow at the end of the storm. I will say no more. _

_**TwinKatanaBlades**__—I was listening to the Pearl Harbor soundtrack while I was writing that last chapter, and I will have to admit, it made me cry as well. Glad you're enjoying the story._

_Thanks to __**NeoMars**__ for beta reading this chapter for me. You're the best!_

_*__**Warning**__: graphic description of drowning. If this is something that might upset you, I suggest you skip the last part of the first section._

* * *

His brothers were gone.

Leonardo stared at the place where they had disappeared from view, feeling an overwhelming sense of loneliness settle over him. The thought that he would never see any of his family again sent a sharp pang of loss through his chest. He would never see Mikey's mischievous smile as he planned a new prank, Donnie's look of concentration as he worked in his lab, or Raph's cocky grin as he prepared to take on an enemy. This realization left him feeling as though a part of him had already died. There had been so much he had wanted to tell them, so much he had wanted to say. But there had been no time, and their goodbye had been all too brief and hurried.

It was probably for the best.

Leo had been holding on to his composure by a thin thread, and if they had stayed any longer, he doubted he would have been able to continue to put on a brave face. He had tried so hard to hide his grief and fear, not wanting to make things any more difficult for them than it already was. He already suspected that if it wasn't for Mikey's deteriorating condition, he never would have been able to convince them to leave him.

But they wouldn't have been able to save him either. Staying would have accomplished nothing but putting their own lives at risk. They would have been forced to stand by helplessly and watch him die, the very thought of which made him feel physically ill. As terrified as he was of being left alone, it was far more preferable than the alternative.

"I'm sorry guys," he whispered into the emptiness, the weight pressing down on his chest a physical manifestation of the weight he carried in his soul. He couldn't help but feel as though he had somehow failed his brothers.

If only he hadn't picked up that canister. He should have at least done the smart thing and given it to Donnie to check out as soon as they had the opportunity. His genius brother would have almost certainly realized that it was a bomb and deactivated it immediately. When it had started beeping, he should have known that something was off. He should have gotten rid of it immediately. If he had, this whole situation could have been avoided. Mikey wouldn't be in serious condition and he wouldn't be about to abandon his family by dying on them. He wasn't sure which was worse; the knowledge that he was soon going to die, alone and helpless in this wet tomb, or the thought that he was leaving his family to go on without him.

'_Raph will take care of them,' _he told himself firmly, believing deep in his heart that it was true. His brother might be hot-headed and quick tempered, but when it came to his family he was like a watch dog let off his leash. No harm would befall Mikey and Donnie while Raph was around.

Still, he couldn't get the look on his brother's face out of his mind. It haunted him. He had never seen Raph looking so lost and defeated. It was like a piece of his brother had been irreparably broken, and Raph had been trying desperately to hold the remaining pieces together. Leo had almost preferred the enraged Raphael over the shattered and hopeless brother who had left his side.

And then there was Donnie. His purple clad brother hadn't even been able to look at him, too overcome with grief. He had clung to Leo's shoulder desperately, unable to let go, and Leo had felt his heart shatter at the overwhelming anguish pouring from his brother. Knowing he was the cause of their pain and grief had pierced him deeply.

And what of Master Splinter and Mikey? How would they handle the news of his death? He thought he knew the answer, and it brought him no comfort. He would do anything to spare them that kind of pain.

A choked sob slipped past his lips, and he began to struggle weakly, knowing it was in vain, but unable to help himself, the desire to fight, to live, burning brightly within him. But the rock slab pinning him was simply too heavy, and all his struggling achieved was robbing him of the precious breath he was already fighting so hard to obtain. His body sagged back into the watery pool surrounding him, his breath coming in harsh pants, tears staining the corners of his eyes. His body hurt, but he was hardly aware of the physical discomfort in the face of his emotional turmoil.

He didn't _want_ to die. He wanted to go home with his brothers. He wanted to make sure that Mikey was truly okay. He wanted to see Splinter again, and feel the warm comfort his father always offered when one of them was sick or hurt. He wanted to make sure that Donnie stayed off his bad leg and Raph wasn't hiding some injury. He wanted to see April and Casey again. He wanted to wake up in his warm bed back at the lair and discover all this had been some horrible nightmare.

The water was almost up to his chin, and he knew he didn't have much time left. He almost wished the end would come quickly, because lying here helplessly waiting for it was the worst kind of torture. His body was shaking with the force of his dread and terror.

'_Fear is only another enemy you must learn to master through discipline and training.'_

Master Splinter's voice echoed to him from some distant corner of his memory, and Leo pulled in a deep breath, willing his shaking limbs to stillness. He might not have learned to completely master his fear, but here, at the end, he would not let it rule him. His brothers may be gone, but he still had his memories of them, and that is what would keep him company in his final moments. That is what he would use to help him fight away the panic. He could think of no better weapon.

Closing his eyes, he exhaled slowly, his body slipping into a state not unlike that used for meditation. Slowly and methodically he began to pull memories of happier times spent with his family to the forefront of his thoughts. It was difficult, his fear constantly attempting to rise back up and take control, but he determinedly fought it down.

He remembered teaching Mikey how to skateboard in the stone corridors outside the lair, a skill that his talented little brother quickly mastered until he outshone them all, even his teacher.

He remembered taking Donnie up to the junkyard at the edge of town for the very first time and watching in fond amusement as his brother excitedly perused the discarded piles of trash in search of hidden treasures.

He remembered exploring the depths of the sewers with Raph, pretending they were knights on a quest to rescue a beautiful princess being held in the bowels of the earth by a fearful dragon.

He remembered sitting in Master Splinter's room, relaxing back against the thick carpets and listening with wonder as his father told him stories about his homeland, daydreaming of one day being able to go there.

He remembered sitting around the kitchen table, his family surrounding him as they shared food and laughter. There were so many memories, and he allowed them to parade through his mind's eye one by one, like film from an old slide projector. A calm peace settled over him, his panic fading and his breathing slowing.

It didn't last long. The loud crash of falling rock from somewhere close by jerked him from his reverie, and he couldn't hold back a startled gasp. A moment later the water surged upward, flowing over his face in a small wave. He responded instinctually, lifting his head up and holding it above the rising water, trying desperately to ignore the agonizing pain the new position ignited in his chest. It was getting even harder to draw in a full breath.

He couldn't be sure, but he thought the sound of falling water had grown louder, as though that last crash of rock had knocked something loose and now even more water was flowing into the room. The water certainly seemed to be rising faster. He could feel it climbing steadily up his neck toward his chin.

'_This is it,'_ he thought numbly, his calm wavering like a wisp of cloud in a heavy wind. He strained to lift his head as high as possible, even as he yearned for it all to be over with. His breaths were coming in painful pants now, every lungful agonizing and yet also somehow precious. He couldn't seem to turn off his fight to survive, even when he had no more energy to fight…even when the battle was mere seconds from being over.

The water slipped over his mouth, forcing him to breathe through his nose. His heart was pounding wildly in his chest, and he already felt as though he wasn't getting enough air. He heard another splash of falling rock from somewhere near him, and this time when the water flowed up and over his face, he had nowhere to go.

In the blink of an eye his calm vanished, replaced instantly by terror. He began to thrash and struggle desperately against the rock pinning him, straining his body as much as he could in an effort to bring his head above the water. But it was no use. The water was rising too quickly now. His struggles only served to rob him of the last bit of air in his already oxygen starved body. He could feel his lungs burning and throbbing, sending desperate signals to his brain demanding air. He fought against the urge to breathe, black dots beginning to swim at the edges of his vision.

But in the end, he had no choice. His body over-rode his mind's command, and he felt his mouth open, his lungs expanding in anticipation of pulling in desperately needed air. But there was no air…only water. It flowed down his throat like chilled blades, stabbing into his lungs and causing his body to convulse. The pain was like none he had ever known, throbbing, burning and stabbing all at once.

His body shuddered under the onslaught, and if he could have screamed in that moment he would have. But even that small release was denied him. His body convulsed and writhed, his hands clawing at his chest as though he could somehow relieve the terrible pressure building there. The agony went on and on, and he screamed soundlessly in his mind, desperate for it all to be over…for the pain to end.

Then, just as suddenly as it had all begun, he felt his body go lax, a numbness sweeping over him and bringing with it blessed relief from the pain. Darkness began to cloud his vision, but this time he welcomed it, knowing the end was finally at hand.

The last thing he saw before the dark took him was Death standing over him, reaching slowly down with curled claws to claim him as its own.

* * *

"Are you sure you're not ready to head home to bed, babe?"

April shifted on the couch, burrowing deeper into Casey's hold, stifling another yawn as she fought to break free of the drowsy pull of sleep.

"Just a few more minutes," she mumbled, glancing at the old clock over the TV. It really was getting late, and she had an important conference call early in the morning, but just as she had all evening, she felt a strange reluctance to leave.

"You know the guys could be a while yet," Casey told her, shifting his position slightly so he could drape an arm down across her back, rubbing soothing circles. "Why don't you just call them in the morning to find out what happened."

April just shrugged, not bothering to look up. She couldn't answer Casey because she wasn't entirely sure herself. She had been in the lair all day, watching the news with the turtles and listening as they planned the evening's mission. When they had left several hours earlier, she hadn't been able to shake the gnawing sense of worry that had been eating at her all day. On the spur of the moment she had decided to remain in the lair until the boys returned, rather than return to her own apartment. She had called Casey, who had been working late covering for a co-worker, and told him where she would be. Then she had begun the agonizing task of waiting, something that she had never been particularly good at.

She knew she was taking the whole "mother hen" routine to a whole new level, but she couldn't seem to help it. She was worried, though she couldn't pin-point the reason why, and she _hated_ being worried. It wasn't like the turtles were helpless children who needed protection. They were ninjas, trained and incredibly skilled, and they did this sort of thing all the time. It had never bothered her before, so why should it now? She didn't understand her feelings of unease, and knew she would deserve every bit of the teasing she would get from the guys when they returned home to find she had waited up for them.

At least she didn't have to wait alone. Splinter had kept her company for the first hour before retiring to his room for his evening meditation. Casey had arrived soon after, bringing with him several cartons of take-out Chinese and a movie. April had been grateful for the distraction, curling up close to her man and losing herself in the action and drama on the screen in front of her.

But now that the movie was over, she was feeling the weariness of a long day, and the worry continued to eat away at her insides, making her stomach churn. She knew she would never be able to sleep even if she _did _go home.

"What do you suppose Stockman and Shredder were up to in that building?" she murmured into Casey's shirt, her thoughts returning to the burning question that had been plaguing her all day.

Casey sighed. "I don't know, babe. Hopefully the guys are finding that out right now. All we can do is wait and see."

April nodded into his chest, then pushed herself away from him and into a sitting position. "I'm going to go and grab a drink," she stated, stretching muscles sore from being in the same position for too long. "Want anything?"

"Not unless Master Splinter has started carrying beer in his fridge," Casey snorted. "I'm telling you, I could use a stiff drink right about now. Work has been a bi..." Casey cut off with a grunt as April elbowed him in the side.

"There's no beer," she stated succinctly, "but I can always make you some of Master Splinter's _Fuman _tea. It's a special blend he created for when the guys start complaining too much. I've seen it work miracles in changing attitudes. It might do you some good."

Casey glanced over at her warily, obviously unsure whether she was teasing him or not. "Uh, no thanks," he muttered. "Does Master Splinter have a tea for everything?"

April let out a short laugh. "Pretty much," she replied, pushing herself up from the couch and heading toward the kitchen.

She was just passing Splinter's room when the door suddenly opened and the old rat stepped out. April opened her mouth to greet him, then paused when she noticed that his head was bowed, one hand lifted to clutch at the side of his skull as though he were in pain. He was panting slightly, and the hand gripping his walking staff was shaking.

"Master Splinter?" April asked in alarm, moving quickly towards him.

Splinter's head came up, and for a moment he looked startled to see her there. She felt her worry increase. In all the time she had known him, she had never seen him taken by surprise by anything.

"Are you okay," she asked, moving nearer but hesitating to actually reach out and touch him.

Splinter shook his head. "I am fine, Miss O'Neil," he murmured softly, dropping his hand from his head and letting out a deep sigh. "I was merely meditating when I sensed…" He trailed off, his eyes quickly scanning the room before coming to rest on the door leading into the lair. An unfamiliar expression flashed across his face, and if April didn't know any better, she would have said that the old rat actually looked afraid.

"Master Splinter?" she repeated questioningly, biting her lip and fighting back her growing sense of dread. "What was it you sensed?"

His gaze slowly moved over to meet hers, and April felt her stomach flip at the look deep in his eyes. "April, if you would be so kind as to call Leonardo for me," he said softly, not bothering to answer her question. "They have been gone for a while now, and I think it is time to check in."

If there had been any doubt in April's mind before that something was wrong, it was gone now. They never called the turtles when they were out on patrol. Never. It was an unspoken rule that they all followed explicitly. A lot of the time the turtles were in situations that required stealth and silence, and a ringing phone could be a distraction that could easily prove dangerous. She knew Donnie had programmed the phones so they could be silenced if necessary, but she also knew the turtles rarely used that feature. They didn't really need to…the only people who might call them while they were out were April and Casey, and they both knew only to do so in cases of emergency.

"Oh, o-okay?" April stammered, reaching for the phone in her pocket, her heart picking up pace. Master Splinter's expression now reflected his normal composure, but April couldn't deny the fact that only moments before he had looked shaken…badly shaken. This in turn only caused April's worry to sky-rocket. Something had happened with Splinter…something he wasn't telling her…something to do with the boys. She was certain of it. Why else would he have her call them in the middle of their mission?

Obediently she punched in the quick dial number that would connect her with Leo's shell cell, lifting it to her ear with a hand that shook slightly. She listened to it ring several times before a long tone let her know it had gone to messaging.

"He's not answering," she stated worriedly, lowering the phone. "Do you want me to try one of the other guys?"

Before Splinter could answer, they were interrupted by the sound of the door to lair swinging open with its normal grating whine. April turned quickly, feeling a flash of relief that instantly faded at the sight that greeted her.

Raphael stood in the doorway, shoulders stooped, eyes glazed, and chest heaving. In his arms he carried an obviously unconscious Mikey, while Donnie leaned heavily into his side, one arm slung over his older brother's shoulders, his head bowed and his breath coming in harsh pants. All three turtles were covered in a layer of dust that didn't hide the scrapes and bruises marring their green skin. Raph took a single staggering step into the lair before collapsing down onto one knee, Donnie falling next to him with a pained groan.

"My sons," Splinter gasped, lurching forward, his movement serving to break April free of her stunned surprise. Together they raced toward the trio at the door, Casey lurching up from the couch and following a step behind.

"Casey, grab Mikey," April called, even as she moved to Donnie's side, kneeling beside him and reaching out worriedly to lay a hand on his shoulder. He didn't look up at her touch, and she could feel him trembling slightly beneath her hand. It was obvious he was beyond exhausted and in more than a little pain.

"Raphael, what has happened?" Splinter demanded, reaching out to lay one furry paw against Mikey's plastron as Casey moved forward to relieve Raph of his burden. For a moment Raphael refused to let go, staring at Casey dazedly, as though not really seeing him.

"It's okay, I've got him, buddy," Casey murmured soothingly.

Raphael blinked at him, then slowly released his grip, surrendering his brother into the vigilante's arms.

"I'll take him back into the med lab," Casey stated, turning with Mikey and heading toward the lab.

"Raphael," Splinter repeated, his tone taking on a desperate note that April had never heard from him before. "What has happened to you and your brothers? Where is Leonardo?"

April felt Donnie flinch at the sound of his brother's name, and Raph's gaze snapped to his father, his dazed expression fading slightly to be replaced with a look of pain.

"I…" he started, then had to stop, swallowing hard, his shoulders stooping as though under a great weight. "I'm sorry, Father," he finally whispered, his voice torn and anguished.

April stiffened, her heart pounding so quickly within her chest that she feared it might explode. Suddenly she didn't want to hear any more…didn't want to hear whatever else Raph had to say. Like a frightened child she wanted to reach up and cover her ears, as though by denying their existence, she could rob his words of their fearful power. But she couldn't move, couldn't even breathe as she stared at Raphael, waiting for him to speak.

"I couldn't save him," Raph voice came out so soft and broken that April almost didn't hear him, his gaze dropping from his father's face to the floor, his shoulders hunched in a position of utter defeat. "I wasn't strong enough. He…he's gone."

April made a small noise in the back of her throat, the only sound that could escape through her suddenly too tight throat. She shook her head, wanting to deny his words, to deny what she knew he was telling them. But then Raph reached over his shoulder and drew one of Leo's katana's from his back, offering the single blade to his father without looking up, and she felt her heart freeze within her chest. There was no way Leo would have willingly parted with one of his beloved swords, not unless…

'_Oh God, no! Please no…'_

Splinter took the sword from Raph's hands, gazing down at the single blade with a look of frozen grief on his furry face. "Leonardo," he whispered softly, drawing a paw down the length of the blade. "My son."

April felt hot tears sliding down her cheeks, her breath coming in small little gasps as she struggled to come to grips with the awful news. She might not have known the turtles for all that long, but they had already become like family to her. The thought that Leo was gone, just like that, when she had been with him only a few short hours ago was almost too much to process. It just didn't seem possible. She couldn't believe it. She didn't _want _to believe.

But looking at Raphael and Donatello, she couldn't deny the truth. The pain of their grief was palpable, hovering in the air around them like an invisible cloud, the weight of it pressing down on her like a heavy blanket.

"H…how?" she stammered, needing to hear the story, to understand exactly what had happened, even knowing that the knowledge wouldn't ease the pain.

Raph let out a deep sigh, slowly lifting his head, his expression one of hopelessness and despair. He opened his mouth, but before he could speak, Casey came bursting from the back room.

"Guys, I'm _really _not liking the sound of Mikey's breathing. I think you need to get back here, Donn…" he trailed off suddenly, taking in the silent scene in front of him. April watched as his eyes flickered one by one to each of their faces before coming to rest on the sword still clutched in Splinter's hands. His face paled, and he slowly shook his head. "No…" he whispered, his expression taking on the shocked denial that April knew must still be mirrored on her own face.

April was about to rise and go to him, needing the comfort of his arms, but before she could, she felt Donnie's hand close around her wrist. She looked over at him in surprise, flinching as she caught her first glimpse of his face. He was pale and drawn, dark circles ringing eyes that were puffy and red from weeping, a look of such deep pain etched on his face that it tore at her heart.

"Help me to the lab," he requested softly, his voice rough and gravelly, as though he had been chewing on glass that had ripped into his vocal chords.

"Donnie," she whispered, wishing desperately that she could come up with something to say to comfort him. Her first thought was "it's going to be okay," but that was so absurdly ridiculous she couldn't force it out past her lips. Never in her life had she met a family as close as this one, and now that one of their own was gone forever, she knew it would rip a gaping hole into the very fabric of their existence. It wasn't okay. It would never be okay.

"Please…" Donnie gasped, already attempting to push himself to his feet, grimacing in obvious pain. "Mikey needs me. I'm not going to lose him too…"

The desperate plea in his voice spurred her into movement, and she reached out and grabbed his arm, helping to steady him as he stood. Raph stood as well, looking only slightly steadier on his feet than Donnie. He reached for his brother's arm, but Casey was suddenly there, slipping in between them and pulling Donnie's arm over his own shoulder instead. "I got him, Raph," he murmured, his voice quiet and subdued.

Raph stepped back, allowing Casey to take his place, his gaze dropping down to where Splinter still kneeled, Leo's sword cradled against his chest. "Master…" Raph started, then choked to a stop, obviously no knowing what else to say.

"Go to your brother," Splinter ordered softly, his head bowed. "I will be there shortly."

April looked over at Casey, their shared grief an unspoken whisper between them. Then they started forward, Donnie limping between them and Raph following slowly behind.

* * *

Splinter was unsure how long he remained kneeling on the steps leading into the lair, his son's sword cradled in his hands, lost in his grief. His greatest fear had now been realized, the worry that had kept him up countless nights while his sons patrolled the city streets far above. Somehow he had always known this moment would come, just as he had always known that it would be Leonardo.

He had felt his son die.

There could be no other explanation for the abrupt sense of tearing pain and loss that had suddenly overcome him during his meditation, ripping him from his mind and driving him to the floor. He hadn't wanted to accept it then, and he still didn't want to accept it. But the evidence was lying in his arms, glittering up at him, cold and uncaring.

Leonardo, his beloved son, was dead.

He did not know where or how, but that information mattered little to him at the moment. All that mattered was that his eldest son was gone, ripped from this life at far too young an age. And Splinter had only himself to blame.

He had known from the start that by raising his sons in the way that he did…training them to fight, installing in them a sense of honor, and pressing them into taking responsibility for a city that would never know or understand them…that he was pushing them into a life of incredible danger. They had been so young, and he'd had his doubts, but they'd risen to each and every challenge he had set before them with enthusiasm and dedication. His training had given them a sense of purpose that they would not have otherwise had, and even knowing the risks, he had not been able to deny them that.

Leonardo of all his brothers had seemed to embrace the life of a ninja the most, throwing himself fully into training and studying, always striving to better himself. From a young age Splinter had watched his child in blue step into the role of leader long before he was ever officially named, always pushing and encouraging himself and his brothers to work harder and achieve more.

Splinter's heart had burned with pride for his oldest son, even as his soul secretly worried. He had seen many warriors in the past just like Leonardo, intensely skilled and burning with a powerful sense of justice. These warriors tended to achieve great things, but they also tended to die young. It was a secret fear that Splinter had carried with him for many years now.

Now that fear had come to pass, and it caused Splinter to question everything. Had he made a mistake in training his sons as ninjas? Would Leonardo still be alive right now had he not? Had he unknowingly sentenced his son to death?

He could feel his tears slowly soaking through his thick fur, and he unconsciously gripped Leonardo's sword more tightly. He knew it was foolish to judge the present based on decisions made in the distant past. There were simply too many variables…too many unknowns. He would not dishonor the memory of his son by questioning past choices. It would only lead to more grief and accomplish nothing.

Very slowly Splinter pushed himself to his feet, feeling older than he had ever felt before. He walked slowly to his room, Leo's precious sword held tightly against him. He entered his room and moved to the far table, gently laying the sword down on its smooth surface. His reflection glinted up at him from the bright metal, and he couldn't help but notice how worn and old he looked, his grief bowing his shoulders and clouding his eyes.

"Ah, my son," he whispered, drawing a single finger gently across the flat of the blade, his mind suddenly flooded with images of his eldest. He could still clearly remember the day he had first given Leonardo the blades. It was a moment of great pride for both of them. Leonardo had just mastered a complicated series of katas with the wooden practice swords, performing them flawlessly with speed and grace. Splinter had known then that he was ready to move up in his training. Leonardo's young eyes had shone with pride and excitement as Splinter had presented him with the twin katanas. _"I will treasure them always, father," _he had whispered as he reverently took the blades. And he had.

Splinter could feel his grief rising like a tidal wave around him, threatening to overwhelm him, but he ruthlessly shoved it back. The time to fully grieve would come later, but right now his other sons needed him. They were lost and in pain. Unlike him, they had never before experienced the devastating loss of a loved one. They would need his presence and comfort to help them through the days ahead.

In one evening their family had been torn apart, and he knew he would be needed to help pick up the pieces. The Hamato clan would never be the same, but as long as they relied on one another to help each other through, they would survive.

With a deep sigh, Splinter turned and began to walk from the room. When he reached the door he paused, turning back to stare at the table and the precious burden it now bore. "Be at peace, my son," he whispered, bowing respectfully in the direction of the sword. "You will be sorely missed." Then he straightened and silently left the room.

TBC

_A bit shorter than the last one, but the next chapter is already looking to be a long one. More about Mikey, I promise._

_You're reviews feed my muse and lend strength and speed to my fingers. *hint hint* _


	4. Chapter 4

_Okay, so this chapter turned into a monster…the longest I have written yet. Nearly twenty pages and over 10,000 words. Yeesh! Hope you enjoy, and thank you as always for your wonderful comments and support! This story would not be possible without you… _

_Thanks as always to NeoMars for beta reading this chapter for me! Any remaining errors are mine._

* * *

They almost lost Mikey.

Once back at the lair, Donnie had worked furiously to stabilize his brother, but despite his best efforts, Mikey's condition had continued to deteriorate. Donnie had begun to fear the worst…that his brother was bleeding in his brain. Desperate and out of options, he had drilled a small hole into Mikey's skull in the hopes that he could drain the blood and relieve some of the pressure.

The whole procedure terrified him more than he would ever admit. His brothers might teasingly call him Doctor Don, but he was well aware of the fact that he was actually no doctor, and he certainly wasn't a brain surgeon. One wrong move and he could either kill his brother outright or else leave him with lasting brain damage. He never would have even dreamed of preforming such a delicate procedure if he hadn't known with absolute certainty that Mikey was dying, and that the craniotomy might be the only way to save him.

Despite his apprehension, the procedure seemed to work, because a short time later Mikey's vitals stabilized, his breathing, pulse, and blood pressure moving back into acceptable ranges. It was a tremendous relief, but Donnie knew his brother wasn't out of danger yet. He had still shown no signs of waking up, which was more than a little concerning. He was in a coma, and Donnie had no idea how long it would last…days, weeks, months? He didn't have the equipment necessary to monitor his brother's brain waves and so had no idea how much damage had been done. He knew it was very possible he had saved Mikey's life, only to have him waste away in a vegetative state. It was a terrifying possibility that he didn't bother sharing with the others, choosing to shoulder the burden of that knowledge on his own.

His family had enough to deal with at the moment.

He remained with Mikey through the rest of the night and all through the next day, refusing to leave his brother's side for even a moment. Caring for Mikey gave him something to focus on, a distraction he desperately needed. His mind slipped into autopilot, any part of his brain not focused on taking care of his little brother turned off.

He rarely kept vigil alone. Raphael had left as soon as Mikey had stabilized and Donnie hadn't seen him since, but Master Splinter was almost always nearby. He spent most of his time sitting at Mikey's side, holding his hand and speaking softly to him. Every now and then he would look up at Donnie, his expression weary and sad. As soon as their eyes met, Donnie would immediately turn away, focusing his attention on the brace he had secured around his knee, or hobbling away to another part of the lab in pretense of searching for some tool.

He knew he couldn't avoid his father forever, but he wasn't ready to face the questions yet, to talk about what had happened…wasn't ready to face the awful truth that the Hamato clan was now one member short. Mikey was all that mattered right now, nothing else. For the first time in his life he felt desperate _not _tothink. So he merely blocked it all away…all the pain and grief and fear…refusing to acknowledge it even as it ate him away from the inside out.

Thankfully Master Splinter seemed to understand his need for distance, never pushing him to talk. But whenever he left the lab, he would pause next to Donnie and lightly grip his shoulder, squeezing gently. Every time he did this, Donnie felt the wall he had put up quaver beneath the onslaught of emotion threatening to break through. A part of him wanted to grab hold of Splinter's robe and bury his face in the soft fur of his father's neck, just as he had when he was a child and had woken from a bad nightmare. But there was no waking from the nightmare he was currently caught in, and even his father's touch couldn't bring him the comfort he so desperately wished for.

April and Casey were around a lot as well. They were mostly silent and subdued, for which Donnie was grateful. The few times they did try to start a conversation with him, he answered in monosyllables and grunts, and they soon got the hint that he wasn't in the mood to talk. Twice April brought him in a tray of food, and while he didn't feel particularly hungry, he picked at it anyway just to appease her. But when she tried to convince him to leave the lab and go and get some rest, he flat out refused. She must have seen something in his expression, because for once she didn't argue.

The day passed into evening, and still Mikey didn't wake up. Donnie was limited in what he could do to help his little brother. He kept an IV drip going to keep Mikey hydrated, administered drugs to help reduce the swelling, and kept a sharp eye on his brother's vitals. Other than that, all he could do was sit and watch, silently praying that he would not lose another brother. If that happened, he honestly didn't think he would survive it.

It was nearing midnight of their second night home when the stress and lack of sleep finally caught up to him. He had just risen from his chair to move over and check on Mikey's IV when a wave of dizziness washed over him, accompanied by a sharp stab of pain from his injured knee. Not expecting the twin assault, he let out a sharp gasp, stumbling forward a step as his vision tunneled in on him.

The next thing he knew he was laying on the cold stone floor, blinking up blearily into his father's concerned face, his head cradled in Splinter's lap. He had no memory of falling, which meant he must have blacked out. Lucky for him it seemed Master Splinter had been able to catch him and at least help break his fall. His leg was throbbing with pain, but otherwise he didn't feel as though he had injured himself further.

"Donnie?"

He jerked slightly at the sound of his name, realizing a bit belatedly that April was kneeling next to him, his hand in hers as she took his pulse. She looked pale and shaken. He began to try and push himself upright, but immediately she reached out and placed a restraining hand on his chest even as Splinter tightened his grip on his shoulders, holding him gently but firmly down.

"Lay still, my son," Splinter ordered softly. "Allow Miss O'Neil to finish examining you."

Donnie frowned. "I'm fine," he mumbled, his voice coming out rough and hoarse from hours of disuse. He pushed against their hold, but to no avail. They were either a lot stronger than he would have given them credit for, or else he was a lot weaker. He suspected it was the latter. He felt as though he had just finished one of Master Splinter's infamous endurance trainings, his muscles as useless as jelly.

"Fine?" April asked, her voice tight with a mix of emotions. "You're not _fine_, Donnie. _Fine _people don't pass out for no reason. You're obviously exhausted and in pain, and yet you refuse to admit it. And what about your leg? Did you even exam it to see what was wrong before you slapped that brace on it, or is that _fine_ also?"

Donnie glared up at her, definitely _not_ in the mood for her mothering at the moment. He knew perfectly well how to take care of himself, thank you very much. He didn't need her lecturing him. He opened his mouth to tell her just that when he suddenly realized she was crying, tears spilling from her eyes and flowing silently down her cheeks. She dashed them away impatiently, but more instantly replaced them.

"Please, Donnie," she pleaded, her voice dropping to a near whisper. "Just let us help you."

Just as quickly as it had come Donnie felt his anger drain away, replaced by a feeling of guilt. He knew April was grieving as well, and his behavior throughout the day had hardly made things easier on her. The last thing she needed was to worry about him on top of everything else, and yet that was exactly what was happening.

He reached out and gently grasped her wrist, squeezing it lightly. "It's okay, April," he murmured softly. "I'm…" he hesitated. He had been about to tell her he was fine again, but decided there was no point in pursuing that particular lie. "I'm going to be okay," he finished instead, not really believing it himself, but needing her to.

She stared down at him for a long moment before squeezing his hand gently in return. "I know you will be, Donnie." She smiled sadly. "But it doesn't hurt to ask for help every once in a while, you know? How do you expect to be able to take care of Mikey if you don't take care of yourself first?"

Donnie flinched slightly at her words, hearing the truth in them, but not yet ready to accept them. As the medical expert in the family he was the one ultimately responsible when one of his family was injured or ill. This wasn't the first time he had held a long vigil beside a fallen brother. There were times in the past when Leo had forcefully carried him from the lab when he had pushed himself beyond exhaustion.

_Leo…_

Donnie felt a sharp pain flare in the center of his chest, and he desperately pushed all thoughts of his oldest brother back behind the wall he had constructed. Not now…he couldn't think about Leo right now. He had to hold it together. If he allowed his emotions free reign he knew he would fall apart, and he couldn't allow that. Mikey needed him.

"Can I get up now," he asked roughly, his tone coming out a little more sharply than he had intended, reflecting his inner struggle.

April stared down at him for a long moment before finally letting out a deep sigh. "Okay," she consented, "but I'm taking a look at your leg." Her face took on the no nonsense expression Donnie had learned to recognize long ago.

Donnie nodded resignedly, allowing April and his father to assist him to his feet. As they helped him up, he couldn't keep from glancing over at the bed, hoping against hope that he would find Mikey gazing back at him. But his little brother was lying just as still and motionless as before, his eyes firmly closed, his chest rising and falling steadily with each breath. Donnie felt his shoulders sag with disappointment.

April helped him sink down into his chair, then immediately set to examining his leg, lifting it up to rest on a nearby stool as she worked. Donnie closed his eyes and settled back in the chair, feeling the weight of his weariness pressing down on him like a heavy blanket. He barely even registered it as April removed the brace and began to gently prod at his knee. Splinter moved back to Mikey's side, and for the next several minutes, silence reigned.

Finally April seemed satisfied, replacing the brace and straightening with a small sigh. "I don't think anything's broken," she reported succinctly, "but it's still pretty swollen." She moved over to Donnie's small medical cabinet, rooting around inside it for a few moments before returning with a chemical ice-pack and four ibuprofen. "Here, take these," she ordered, thrusting the pills at him before breaking the ice pack and placing it over his still elevated knee.

"Thanks April," Donnie muttered before tossing the pills into the back of his throat and dry swallowing them.

April made a face. "Yuck," she grimaced. "I thought Raph was the only one who did that."

Donnie shrugged, running a tired hand down across his face. "Speaking of Raph, where _is_ he?" he asked, finding it strange that his brother hadn't been by once all day to check on Mikey. Usually Raphael was as bad as Leo when it came to hovering over an injured sibling.

April's face fell, and she dropped her gaze down to her lap. "He went into his room late last night and hasn't come out since," she reported softly. "He wouldn't even let Master Splinter or Casey in to see him."

Donnie shifted in his chair, realizing the conversation was straying into territory he wasn't yet ready to explore. "He's probably just resting," he mumbled quickly, glancing away, his hands unconsciously curling into fists in his lap.

"Yeah," April answered wearily, her head still bowed, her fingers picking absentmindedly at a spot on her shirt.

Donnie found his gaze returning to her, taking in the weary slump of her shoulders and the dark circles beneath her eyes. "You look tired, April," he observed softly.

She looked up at him, her expression startled. "Well if that isn't the pot calling the kettle black, I don't know what is," she huffed, straightening slightly and placing both hands on her hips, running a critical eye over his form. "I'm not the one passing out from sheer exhaustion here."

Donnie shrugged. "Yeah, but I don't have to go to work in the morning," he countered pointedly.

April gave a small shake of her head. "I'm taking the week off," she replied quietly. "I thought that…well maybe…I thought that maybe I would be needed here…" she trailed off, biting at her bottom lip, her eyes clouding with tears once more.

Donnie clenched his jaw, quickly looking away. Normally he wouldn't have hesitated to try and comfort her, but he couldn't do that now. Not without acknowledging the reason behind her distress, the very thing he had been purposely avoiding all day.

"Donnie…" April whispered, pulling his gaze back to her even as he felt the sudden urge to stand up and run away. He could tell from her expression that she wanted to talk to him about what had happened…about Leo, and the very thought sent icy fingers of terror crawling up his spine.

'_Not now, April, please not now,'_ he silently begged, dropping his eyes down to his lap, his stomach twisting into a painful knot. _'I can't do this. I can't!' _He flinched as she reached out and gently grasped his wrist, his whole body tensing in preparation for what he knew was coming next.

But she didn't immediately say anything, and the minutes ticked silently past. When she finally did speak, her voice held an understanding that he had not been expecting. "Don, I was serious when I said you need to take care of yourself," she murmured softly. "You're exhausted. You collapsed because you've pushed yourself too far. If you don't rest, your body won't be able to heal, and you'll only make yourself sick."

Donnie swallowed hard, shaking his head in denial of her words. "I'm not leaving Mikey alone," he stated forcefully.

"He won't be alone," April replied quickly. "Master Splinter or I will be with him the whole time, and we can come and get you if there is the slightest change. You have to trust us, Donnie."

Donnie continued to shake his head, not sure how to explain to her that his reluctance to leave Mikey wasn't about trust…it was about fear. Fear that if he left, his little brother would slip silently away while he wasn't there. Fear of being alone in his room with nothing but his thoughts for company. Right now his thoughts were dangerous. Right now he was pretty sure his thoughts could destroy him.

"Miss O'Neil is right, my son," Splinter spoke up from his position beside the bed, turning in his chair to level Donnie with a firm but compassionate stare. "You must rest if you are to maintain the strength needed to help Michelangelo through this. Your dedication is admirable, but you will be doing no one any good if your own health is compromised."

Donnie clenched his jaw, wanting to argue, but knowing it wouldn't do any good. Splinter had a look that clearly stated he had made up his mind on the subject and would not be swayed. It didn't help that Donnie knew they were right. He was so exhausted his vision was beginning to blur and his limbs felt weighted down. And as much as he hated the idea of leaving Mikey, it was unrealistic to believe he could stay by his brother's side indefinitely. Mikey's recovery was sure to take time, and if Donnie wanted to be able to provide his brother with the care he would undoubtedly need during that recovery, he had to rest. His earlier collapse was proof enough that he had driven his body past its endurance point.

Still, knowing the truth didn't make it any easier to accept.

Taking a deep breath, he let his gaze travel to the bed, taking in his brother's too still form. "You'll need to start a new IV drip in a few hours," he told them quietly, giving in to the inevitable. "And make sure you keep an eye on his vitals. If there is any drastic change, you need to come and get me right away."

April gave him a tired smile. "We'll take care of him Donnie, I promise."

Donnie nodded, reaching out to grab the ice pack from his knee before slowly lowering his leg to the floor and pushing himself to his feet. He hobbled over to the bedside, doing a quick check over the IV and equipment monitoring his brother's vitals . Once he was certain everything was functioning properly, he gave Mikey's arm a quick squeeze, staring down into his little brother's still face. "Don't you dare go anywhere while I'm gone, Mikey," he whispered softly, his chest feeling uncomfortably tight.

With an effort of will he turned from the bed and began to limp toward the lab door, waving Splinter back down when his father made to rise as if to help him. He mumbled a quick goodnight to them both, then hurried as quickly as he could from the room before he lost his resolve and changed his mind.

He was so exhausted the stairs leading up to his room seemed daunting, and he would have just crashed on the couch if it wasn't already occupied by a sprawled out, snoring Casey. With a resigned sigh, Donnie began to limp up the stairs, using the railing to haul himself upward one step at a time. His knee was throbbing by the time he reached the top landing, but he ignored the pain as he started down the hallway.

A tray of untouched food sitting abandoned outside Raphael's room caught his attention and he paused, staring at the closed door. It was completely quiet on the other side, and he suddenly found himself tempted to check in on Raph, just to make sure he was okay. But he hesitated, unsure if his brother was asleep and not wanting to wake him if he was. Even if Raph was awake, he somehow doubted his brother would let him in. And if he did, what would Donnie say to him? How could he comfort his brother when he had yet to face his own grief?

With a heavy sigh he turned from his brother door, only to find himself staring at the doorway directly across the hall. His breath caught in his throat, and his heart began to beat very rapidly. A voice deep within his mind screamed at him to walk away, to get out of there as fast as he could, but he stood rooted to the spot, temporarily unable to move.

Then, almost against his will, he felt his feet carrying him forward, his hand reaching for the handle. It was as though he was some sort of puppet, his body working without the command of his mind. He turned the knob and swung the door open, stepping inside before his brain finally kicked into gear and brought him up short, standing frozen just over the threshold.

Leo's room looked exactly as it had any of the other thousands of times Donnie had been in it. The bed against the wall was neatly made, not a wrinkle to be found in the blue coverlet, a spare blanket folded tidily at the foot. The single dresser beside the bed held a few neatly stacked books and a couple of half-used candles. A woven mat sat in the center of the floor, its bright colors somewhat at odds with the simplicity of the rest of the room. A broadsword hung on a hook over the bed, its sheath tarnished and worn, showing its age.

The furnishings in the tiny room were so sparse, and yet they had obviously held a deep meaning for his brother. The books on the dresser had been a gift from Donnie, extremely rare texts on ancient Japanese warfare techniques. The mat on the floor was from Michelangelo, the bright colors and swirling pattern more characteristic of the youngest' taste than those of the oldest. The sword on the wall had been from Raphael, an old antique he had acquired from one of April's contacts. Even the blanket on the bed had been a gift from Master Splinter when they had first moved into the new lair. Here, in his most private place, Leo had chosen to surround himself with reminders of his family. It was so simple, and yet somehow spoke volumes as to the character of who Leo was.

Or rather, who Leo _had _been.

Donnie felt his legs start to give out on him, and managed to lurch forward, collapsing on the edge of the bed, uncaring of the flair of pain from his injured leg. The realization that Leo would never again walk into this room, would never again sleep on this bed, hit him like a physical blow, causing him to double over, clutching at his chest. The carefully constructed wall he had placed around his emotions began to crumble, and he no longer had the strength to fight it.

He collapsed down across the bed, grief that he could no longer deny or ignore sweeping over him, powerful in its intensity. He curled up on his side, clutching Leo's pillow to him as deep sobs tore up from the back of his throat.

In his mind he called out to his brother…screamed his name over and over again. He begged Leo to come back, pleaded with fate for this all to be some horrible nightmare. His brother couldn't be gone…he couldn't. It just wasn't something he was ready to accept.

And yet he knew it was true. Knew it deep within his heart. His brother was dead, and there was absolutely nothing he could do to change that fact.

His tears quickly soaked into the soft blanket beneath him, his body shaking with the force of his grief. His hands clutched his brother's pillow to him desperately, as though as long as he held on he could somehow keep a piece of Leo with him forever.

It was all just too much. His exhausted body couldn't handle the waves of emotions crashing through him. Heartbroken and utterly spent, he found his eyes sliding closed, tears still falling unheeded down his face even as his mind slipped silently into the dark release of sleep.

* * *

He shouldn't be here.

Raphael stood staring at the partially collapsed entrance to the tunnel, his heart hammering inside his chest, his throat dry with fear. The echo of splashing water came from somewhere in the room beyond, filling him with a sense of overwhelming dread. A steady stream of water flowed out from the entrance to the tunnel, swirling lazily around his ankles before drifting away into the darkness behind him. A part of him wanted to turn away and follow the water wherever it might lead, not really caring where he ended up, as long as it was away from _here_.

Leo had told him not to look back, and he knew he should have listened to his brother. He knew what he would find if he continued forward, and it terrified him beyond measure. Yet here he was anyway. He couldn't really explain his need to do this. It was something he didn't quite understand, but he had felt compelled to return to this hated place one last time. Maybe he had to see with his own eyes before he could accept that his brother was really gone. Or maybe this was the closure he needed to finally allow himself to grieve and then move on. All he knew was that something had drawn him here, and he was helpless to resist it.

His family didn't know where he was. He had slipped out when no one was around. He wasn't sure whether they would have tried to stop him, or insisted on coming with him. Neither option was acceptable to him. He had to do this, and he had to do it alone.

Now if only he could gather the courage to move forward.

Minutes slipped by unnoticed and unheeded as he stood frozen, rooted to the floor, fighting for the strength to push past his fear. He knew there was only one way he could ever accept what had happened and find a way to move on, and it lay in the room beyond.

Taking a deep steadying breath, he slowly began to wade forward, the water around his feet picking up strength, almost as though it was trying to push him away, to warn him from proceeding down the path he had chosen. He was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling rapidly with his growing panic, but he pushed past it, ducking down through the damaged tunnel entrance and straightening on the other side. The room beyond was terrifying in its familiarity, and yet also strangely foreign now that it was covered in its watery blanket. He took a moment to glance around, orienting himself, before pushing forward before the paralyzing fear could take hold of him once more.

The water grew steadily deeper, and soon he was forced to swim, mindful of the piles of rock and broken debris hidden just beneath the surface. He knew exactly where he was headed, but the closer he came to his destination, the slower he moved, his limbs feeling heavy and uncoordinated beneath the weight of his dread.

Could he really do this? Doubt plagued his mind, further slowing his progress. Wouldn't it be better if he allowed his last memory of his brother to be when Leo was still alive, smiling up at him with determination and love as he urged him to go?

But he couldn't stop now. The same compelling force that had driven him from the lair was pushing him onward.

He spotted the slab of rock in front of him, angling up out of the water like the broken tooth from some giant sea monster. It chilled him to his core, and he felt his stomach churn with apprehension. He was close now. Very close.

A few more strong strokes and he reached the slab. His breathing was coming so hard and fast now that he thought he might pass out, his whole body trembling uncontrollably. He tried to tell himself it was from the chill of the water, but he knew better. Clenching his jaw, he closed his eyes and fought to calm himself, with little success. He knew what was lying just a few feet beneath him, and the knowledge made him feel as though he was about to be violently ill.

'_Just get it over with and get out of here,'_ a voice screamed inside his head.

Moaning with the force of his dread, he gripped the edge of the slab rock, took a deep breath, and looked down. The water was murky and dim, but not so much so that he couldn't see at least few feet down, and that was all he needed.

His brother's face floated serenely directly beneath him, his blue bandana tales floating out to one side, waving lazily in the soft current. His eyes were closed, his face peaceful. If it weren't for the unnatural pallor of his skin, it would have looked like he was merely sleeping. Raph stared down at his brother's body in a mixture of horror and fascination. His body had gone completely numb. He could no longer feel himself breathing, no longer feel the pounding of his heart in his chest. His whole focus was on his brother, and he stared down intently, almost as though he were waiting for something to happen.

Then, suddenly, Leo's eyes snapped open, his mouth gaping wide in a soundless scream, his face contorting in agony. He lifted a hand up toward Raphael, the flesh of his fingers already peeling away, his eyes begging his brother to help him…to save him. His fingers brushed against the bottom of Raph's foot and…

Raph jerked upright in his hammock, a scream of horror lodged deep in his throat. He thrashed and twisted, struggling to be free of the blanket tucked around his legs, the cloth suddenly feeling too much like grasping hands. His struggles caused his hammock to overturn, and he was dumped unceremoniously to the ground, landing hard with a loud thump.

He didn't stay down for long. Pushing himself upright, he bolted for the door, unlocking it and yanking it open in one desperate move. He raced down the hall to the bathroom, throwing himself inside and falling to his knees in front of the toilet just as the heaves began. He gripped the edge of the seat tightly as his stomach clenched and spasmed, ridding itself of everything he had ever eaten. Unfortunately for him, that hadn't been much in the last few days, meaning that most of what he was bringing up was bile, burning and tearing at the soft tissue of his throat.

After what seemed like an eternity he collapsed back against the bathroom wall, feeling dizzy and weak. He was shaking like a leaf in a strong wind, panting and sweating heavily.

"It was just a dream," he whispered hoarsely, repeating the mantra over and over again within his mind, fighting desperately to gain control of his body. "Just a dream…"

Finally, after several long minutes, he pushed himself to his feet, stumbling over to the sink and turning on the cold water. He washed his face and rinsed his mouth, avoiding looking at his reflection in the mirror, afraid of what he would see looking back at him. He wasn't shaking quite as badly anymore, but his hands were still trembling and he couldn't seem to bring them to stop. The dull numbness that had encased him all day was beginning to return, and he wasn't sure whether to welcome its presence or not. One thing he did know, he wouldn't be returning to bed anytime soon.

Stepping from the bathroom he paused, leaning against the door-jam as he tried to regain his composure. It was still late—or early, depending on how you looked at it—and a heavy quiet lay over the lair. He was sure the rest of his family were either sleeping, or in the lab, which suited him just fine. He would rather be alone at the moment anyway.

He turned to head downstairs, but pulled up short when he noticed the door to Leo's bedroom was standing open. He knew for a fact it had been closed earlier. His heart picked up speed, though he couldn't explain why. He stepped over to the door, peering inside.

When he saw the green figure lying sprawled out across the bed, his heart soared with impossible hope. Had he been dreaming this whole thing? Was Leo still alive and well and Raph had just been suffering the effects of an incredibly realistic nightmare?

Then his mind finally registered what he was seeing, and as quickly as it had come his hope disappeared. It was Donnie lying on the bed, not Leo. The disappointment he felt in that moment was more intense than anything he had ever felt in his seventeen years of life.

Swallowing hard, he stepped closer to the bed, staring down at his sleeping brother. Even in sleep Donnie's face was lined with pain and grief, the tear tracks on his face and the slight hitch to his breathing proof that he had cried himself to sleep. There were dark patches beneath his eyes, and the way he was clumsily sprawled across the bed spoke of his utter exhaustion.

Raphael felt a wave of guilt wash over him.

While his brother had driven himself to exhaustion taking care of Mikey, Raph had been busy hiding in his room, unable to face the sight of his baby brother lying so still and sick…unable to face the possibility that he might lose _two_ brothers instead of just one. He had ignored Casey and his father when they had come to his room throughout the day, tuning out their soft please through the wood of his door, lost to his own grief and despair. He hadn't wept, hadn't screamed, hadn't even gotten angry…he had merely sat, silent and empty until sleep claimed him.

'_Take care of them, Raph…'_

Leo's final command echoed through his mind, and Raph couldn't help but wince in shame. His brother had been gone for less than two day, and already Raph was failing him. He had run away and hid when his family needed him the most. The thought of being strong for them when he felt so shattered and weak himself was just too overwhelming. How could he help them through their own grief when he hadn't figured out how to grieve himself? He was still too numb.

He didn't know the answer, but he knew he needed to try. He owed Leo that much.

He reached down and grabbed the blanket folded at the end of the bed, rubbing the soft cloth between his fingers for a moment before spreading it out over his sleeping brother. Donnie let out a soft sigh as he gently tucked the blanket around him, but did not wake. Raph stared down at him for a moment longer before quickly turning and leaving the room, unable to stay there any longer, haunted by his older brother's absence.

'_I don't know if I can do this without you, Leo,'_ he thought wearily, slowly descending the stairs and heading toward the lab. _'You were always the strong one, not me.'_

He passed the couch where Casey and April lay sleeping, their bodies tangled tightly together in an obvious effort to give and provide comfort. He was careful not to wake them, keeping his movements silent as he walked over to the open lab door.

The lights in the lab were turned down low, casting the interior in heavy shadow. Raph blinked his eyes a few times to adjust them to the gloom, then slowly walked toward the bed in the far corner. Master Splinter was sitting in a nearby chair, his head bowed, one hand resting on top of Mikey's arm. From what Raph could tell, his little brother hadn't moved at all since he had last seen him the previous night, the stark white of the bandages wrapped around his head in sharp contrast to his emerald green skin. Raph remembered again the sick horror he had felt watching Donnie drill a hole into the side of his little brother's head. It was an image that would haunt him for some time to come.

As he neared the bed, Master Splinter raised his head, his dark eyes widening slightly upon seeing who was approaching. Then he smiled gently, his ears twitching forward in a sign of welcome. "My son," he greeted warmly. "I am glad you have come."

Raph ducked his head, unable to meet his father's gaze, ashamed anew at his behavior throughout the day. "How is he?" he asked quietly, reaching out and gripping his brother's limp hand in his own. Mikey's skin was dry and cool beneath his touch.

Splinter hesitated for a moment before releasing a soft sigh. When he answered his voice held a deep weariness. "There has been no change," he admitted solemnly. "He has remained stable, but has shown no sign of waking."

Raph nodded numbly, staring down at his little brother's face, his throat tight with a mixture of emotions.

"Do not despair, my son," Splinter murmured gently. "Your brother is strong. He will fight his way back to us."

At any other time, Raph might have found comfort from those words, but not now. Leo had been strong as well, but that hadn't stopped his older brother from dying. Why should he expect anything different with Michelangelo? He should just start preparing himself for the worst now, that way when it came, he would be better prepared to deal with it.

He let out a soft snort. As if it was even possible to prepare to lose a brother.

He felt the weight of his father's gaze from across the bed, and he forced himself to look up and meet Splinter's eyes. "I'll stay with him now if you want to go and get some rest," he offered quietly, noting how weary his father looked.

Splinter didn't reply immediately, his shrewd gaze making Raph feel as though his father was looking right through him, straight into his innermost being. It was a disconcerting feeling, and he found himself quickly looking away, wanting to somehow hide the darkness he felt inside from his father's knowing eyes.

"Were you able to get some sleep, my son?" Splinter finally asked gently, his gaze losing some of its sharpness in the face of Raph's obvious discomfort. "You look tired. Perhaps you should return to bed. I do not mind staying with Michelangelo for a while longer."

Raph shook his head. "I'm fine," he assured his father hurriedly, barely suppressing a shudder as the memory of his nightmare flashed through his mind. He wouldn't be ready to sleep again for quite some time. "I just woke up. It's your turn to get some sleep, Sensei."

Splinter hesitated for a moment longer before finally nodding. He slowly pushed himself up from his chair, reaching for his walking staff. He placed one hand on Mikey's forehead, leaning low over the bed to whisper something in his youngest son's ear. Then he straightened and moved around the bed, pausing next to Raphael, one long fingered hand coming to rest on his shoulder.

"You are not alone, my son," he stated quietly, his tone suddenly heavy with the weight of his own grief. "Remember this, Raphael. It is in each other that we will find the strength to continue on. If you have need of me, I will always be there."

Raph felt a lump form in the back of his throat and all he could manage was a small nod, his gaze firmly fixed on the floor. Splinter squeezed his shoulder tightly, then slowly walked from the room. Just as he reached the door, he turned and called out, "Talk to him, my son. He needs to know his family is near." Then he was gone.

Moving slowly, Raph circled the bed and slipped into the chair his father had just vacated. He hesitated a moment, then reached out and lifted Mikey's hand, intertwining his fingers with his brothers.

"Alright, Mikey," he spoke softly, "it's time for you to wake up now and tease me for holding your hand. I promise, I won't even hit you. I'm offering you a freebie this one time, but you hafta wake up to take advantage of it."

He stared at his brother's face intently, hoping for some sort of reaction, but Mikey remained frustratingly still, his eyes firmly shut.

"Come on, Bro," Raph urged, gripping his brother's hand tighter. "Our family is in kinda a rough spot right now, and we need you. You hear me, Mikey? We _need_ you." His voice broke, and he paused, clearing his throat self-consciously.

He felt like he was barely holding it together. He hated seeing Mikey like this. It just seemed so wrong. He would gladly trade places with his brother a hundred times over if it meant Mikey would be okay. Just as he would have gladly traded places with Leo beneath that slab. He was beginning to realize that the pain of dying had to be nothing compared to the pain of being left behind.

He closed his eyes, blocking out the image of his brother's still face, his shoulders drooping beneath the weight of his despair. "Please," he whispered brokenly, "please... I can't lose you too."

Silence descended over the lab. He knew he should keep talking to his brother as Splinter had suggested, but he just didn't know what else to say. It all seemed like such a waste of breath anyway. Wherever Mikey was, he obviously couldn't hear him, and it was foolish to believe otherwise.

He sat for several long minutes, eyes closed and head bowed, his mind slipping into the numb emptiness that had enfolded him all day. He was so lost in the darkness of his own mind that he almost didn't feel the slight twitch of his brother's hand in his own. Then it came again, stronger than before, and his head jerked up, his eyes flying open.

"Mikey," he gasped, feeling his heart lurch as he looked down at his younger brother. Mikey's brow was furrowed, a slight frown marring his features. His head was rocking lightly from side to side across his pillow, his fingers spastically gripping and then releasing their hold on Raph's hand. It looked like he was fighting to wake up, and Raph felt a flare of hope ignite deep inside his chest.

"That's it, Mikey," he called softly in encouragement, leaning forward over his brother and squeezing his hand tightly. "Come on and open those eyes. You can do it, buddy."

Mikey continued to fidget restlessly for a few minutes longer before suddenly going still once more, his hand growing lax in Raph's grip, his features settling back into the still mask Raph had grown to hate. A wave of cold disappointment washed over Raph, and before he could stop himself he was leaning over his brother and grasping his shoulders, shaking him lightly.

"Come on, Mikey. Don't do this. You were so close! You need to wake up, buddy. Wake up!"

Mikey let out a low groan, and Raph instantly released him, jerking back, suddenly afraid that he had somehow hurt his brother. He debated calling for his father, or even running upstairs to get Donnie, but he found he couldn't bring himself to leave Mikey's side just yet. He stared at his brother's face intently, watching as his features once more scrunched up into a slight grimace. Mikey groaned a second time; his eyelids fluttered softly before slowly sliding partially open, revealing a sliver of light blue.

Raph let out the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding, leaning close over his brother's form. "Mikey?" he asked softly, keeping his voice tuned low. "Can you hear me, buddy?"

Mikey's eyes rolled in his direction, opening slightly wider as they took him in. A few long seconds passed, and then Mikey swallowed hard and spoke.

"Raph?"

The single word came out the barest hint of a whisper, rough and harsh around the edges, but to Raphael, it was the most beautiful sound in the world.

"Hey there," he greeted softly, relief so strong it left him shaking sweeping through him. "Welcome back, little brother. How ya feelin?"

Mikey blinked up at him slowly, his eyes glazed and hooded with exhaustion, his expression one of pain and confusion. With what appeared to be a monumental effort, he licked his lips and rasped out, "head…hurts."

Raph winced in sympathy. "Yeah, I bet. You managed to give yourself quite a knock to the noggin there, bro. You've been out of it for a while now."

Mikey's brow furrowed, his hand clenching tightly around Raph's fingers. "What happened?" he whispered, the words coming out so soft and weak that Raphael had to strain to hear them.

He hesitated, debating how much he should tell his brother. "There was an explosion," he finally replied. "You got hit in the head with some falling debris."

Mikey blinked up at him blankly, obviously having no memory of the event that had very nearly cost him his life. "You hurt?" he finally whispered, the words coming out slightly slurred, but still intelligible.

Raph slowly shook his head. "No buddy, I wasn't hurt," he answered quietly.

Mikey gave the barest hint of a nod, then forced out another word. "Others?"

Raphael knew immediately what his brother was asking, and the question left him frozen, his heart suddenly racing within his chest. How should he answer? How did he tell his brother, who was already weak, confused, and in pain, that one of his brothers was dead? The news would crush Mikey, and in his already weakened state, Raph had no idea what the effects on his health would be. Certainly not anything good.

When he didn't answer immediately, Mikey's brow furrowed in a small frown. "Raph…?" he whispered, the question evident in his tone.

"Everybody's fine, Mikey." The words were out of his mouth before he even thought about it, the lie tasting bitter on his tongue. Still, he knew instantly that it was the right choice. Mikey was in no condition to hear about Leo right now. When he was stronger and better able to handle the news, Raph would tell him, but right now he needed to remain calm and rest so his body could heal. Raphael dreaded the moment when he would be forced to tell his brother the truth, but for now he couldn't allow himself to think about that.

He leaned forward and squeezed Mikey's upper arm. "You just need to focus on yourself right now, okay buddy. That's all that matters. Focus on getting better, okay?"

Mikey was still frowning slightly, but he was obviously too exhausted to press the issue. "Kay," he finally mumbled softly, his eyes slipping closed once more. A few moments later his breathing evened out into the steady cadence of sleep.

Raph stared down at him, resisting the urge to shake him awake again. He had been the recipient of enough concussions to know that right now his brother needed rest more than anything else. Mikey's injury had been severe enough he would probably be sleeping an awful lot over the next several days. Raph didn't care. He had woken up and talked to Raph, which meant that he was likely going to be okay. The relief brought by that knowledge was overwhelming.

He dropped his head down to the edge of the bed, feeling something release deep within him, like a coil that had been wound too tight suddenly springing free. He realized tears were flowing down his face, but he didn't try to stop them. He let the emotions roll over him; the pain, the fear, the grief, the guilt…all of it sweeping through him like a tidal wave, driving the numbness away before it.

Sitting beside his sleeping brother, he finally let it all go, crying silently into the cold sheets of the bed. Alone in the silence he wept for the brother that had been returned to them…and he wept for the brother that never would.

* * *

The abandoned warehouse lay near the outskirts of town, not far from the docks and bordering the edge of an old industrial park that had long since seen its heyday. The warehouse was in poor condition, a testament to the cruel passage of time and neglect, its windows broken and its walls sagging. The bottom floors were covered with spray painted graffiti, and small mountains of beer bottles and other discarded trash marked it as an occasional hangout location for local gangs and street thugs.

Alpha stood alone on the east end of the warehouse roof, surveying the broken down junk heap that had recently become his new home. Having lived on the streets of New York for over a year, he was no stranger to squalor and filth, but the warehouse was a new low even for him.

'_It beats living in a cage,'_ he told himself firmly, remembering the iron prison that had been his home for the past six months. Six months of endless torture and experimentation, writhing in agony on the floor of his cage as his body was slowly warped and mutated into the monster he had now become.

The light from the full moon behind him reflected back at him from a small puddle of water at his feet, and he stared down at the murky shadow of his reflection. The image that stared back at him was something straight from a classic Hollywood horror movie. He stood upright on two legs, but that's where any human resemblance ended. Over six feet tall, his body was covered in sandy colored fur that hid the thick, corded muscles beneath. His legs ended in padded paws with sharp claws, and his head was that of a canine, complete with pointed ears, elongated muzzle, and sharp teeth. Even his long fingered hands were crowned with pointed claws. The end result was something wild and dangerous…not human, but not completely animal either.

A freak. It was the only way he could describe himself now.

"They took my body, but they did not take my mind," he whispered down at his reflection, repeating the mantra that kept him going when despair and depression threatened to overwhelm him. A low growl escaped his throat, the sound wild and feral. "I will make them pay for what they have done to me."

The smallest of sounds from somewhere behind him had him instantly on alert, his ears lying flat against his head, his muzzled lifted to sniff at the air. A moment later he relaxed, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Do you have something to report, Two Toes?" he called out, not bothering to turn from his silent vigil.

He heard the soft scrape of claws across the loose gravel of the roof behind him, and a moment later Two Toes stepped up to his side, lounging back on his haunches, his black fur glowing softly in the light of the moon. He regarded Alpha with dark eyes, his expression revealing nothing of his thoughts. Finally he spoke. "The area is secure. The twins are on patrol as you requested, but everything has been quiet."

Alpha gave a short nod. "And what of Viz?"

Two Toes' response was a nonchalant shrug. "He's still downstairs with our…guest," his lips curled with disdain at the last word.

Alpha turned away, choosing not to respond. Toe Toes had made his opinion of the whole situation well known, and while Alpha secretly agreed with him on some points, he had chosen to remain silent, trusting the judgment of his old friend. Viz was an intelligent and talented soldier, and over the many years Alpha had known him, he had learned to trust him. Unlike Two Toes, who had agreed to follow him out of necessity, but whose loyalty Alpha would never fully count on.

"So what is your plan now, Alpha?" Two Toes broke into his thoughts, his tone harsh and impatient. "I didn't escape that cage only to rot in some abandoned warehouse. We should be long gone from the city by now."

Alpha turned to look at him, letting out a low growl of warning. "And where do you suggest we go, Two Toes?" he asked mockingly. "Out into the wilderness were we might find our wild brethren and howl with them at the moon?" he shook his head, his eyes dancing with a fiery light. "I have no intention of leaving the city. This is my home, and I will be damned if I allow them to take that from me as well!"

"Some home." Two Toes sneered, glancing around him disdainfully. "If we stay here, we will be hunted for the rest of our lives."

Alpha smiled coldly, the corners of his lips drawing up to reveal a row of razor sharp teeth. "Not if we become the hunters first," he replied dangerously.

Two Toes cocked his head to one side, a glint of interest reflecting in his dark eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked curiously.

Alpha shook his head. "We will speak of it later," he stated dismissively, moving past Two Toes and heading for the trap door leading down into the warehouse. "Go and check on the twins," he called back over his shoulder. "Until we are completely sure this place is abandoned, we cannot take any chances of being discovered here."

He didn't wait for an answer as he lifted the hatch and lowered himself down, bypassing the narrow ladder and merely dropping the fifteen feet to the walkway below. He landed easily on the pads of his feet, and then took off toward the far end of the warehouse, heading for the row of old offices that lined the far wall.

The beginnings of a plan were forming in his mind, but he was not yet ready to put it into play. Viz's actions had thrown a bit of a monkey wrench into things, and he would need to make sure that whole situation was under control before he could proceed with anything else. He hadn't survived as long as he had by being sloppy. He had always been known as someone who was meticulously detail oriented, and in their current situation, it was a trait he would have to rely on all the more. There was no room for mistakes now.

By mutual consent the others had made him their leader, a position he had not asked for but neither did he deny. He was the oldest and most experienced of them all, and it was his cunning and planning that had allowed them to escape in the first place. Now he felt a responsibility toward them and was determined not to fail.

He reached the door to the first office, pulling it open and stepping inside without knocking. The interior of the room was dimly lit with a single candle perched on an overturned box, but Alpha did not need the light in order to make out his surroundings. His eyes immediately went to the center of the room where a pile of old boxes and ratty blankets had been laid out in a rough semblance of a bed. A figure lay in the center of the pile, still and motionless, his green skin reflecting the soft glow from the candle, the bandana tied around his head looking almost black in the dim light.

Alpha regarded him curiously. Just a few days ago he had believed that he and the others were alone in the world, completely unique in their mutation. Then he had seen the four turtles battling on the rooftops, and everything had changed. He had been filled with a great curiosity. Who were these turtles? Where had they come from? Where there any more of their kind out there?

When he had sent Viz and Two Toes to follow them, he had merely been in search of clues that might lead him to the answers to these questions. He certainly hadn't expected them to return several hours later with one of the turtles thrown over their shoulder, unconscious and barely clinging to life. It complicated things.

"How is he?" he asked quietly into the silence.

The shadows in the far corner of the room shifted, and a moment later the massive gray shape of his old friend stepped forward into the light. Viz looked down at the figure on the makeshift bed, his expression unreadable. "The same," he replied simply.

"Will he survive?" Alpha asked calmly.

Viz gave a small shrug of his massive shoulders. "I do not know," he replied honestly. "It is too early to tell. I have done all that I can for him, which isn't much."

Alpha snorted. "Once again you sell yourself short, my friend. He wouldn't even be breathing now if it weren't for you." He paused, cocking his head slightly to one side and regarding his friend through narrowed eyes. "Though I must say, I am curious as to why you would go to such efforts to revive him when Two Toes tells me he was already gone when you reached him?"

Viz looked over at him, his dark eyes boring into Alpha with a rare intensity. "It wasn't too late for him," he replied simply. "I knew he could prove useful to us. It was an opportunity that I could not let pass. Do you question my decision?"

Alpha hesitated for the briefest moment before shaking his head. "Of course not." He replied calmly. "You should know me well enough to know that I never throw away a potential asset." He moved forward to stand beside the makeshift bed, looking down at its unconscious occupant. "We are in a new and hostile world now, Viz. You are correct…this mutant may prove valuable to us. At the very least he may be able to provide us with important information. You did well in bringing him to me. But we must move forward with caution until we know more about him. It is possible he and his companions are working for Stockman. It would explain their presence near the lab. If the others come looking for him…"

"They won't," Viz cut in, his tone filled with certainty. "They abandoned him to his fate when the tunnel collapsed. I am sure they believe him long dead by now." There was a faint tone of disgust in his voice

It didn't really surprise Alpha. His friend had always carried the soldiers' idealistic notion of no man left behind. It was a noble enough idea, but Alpha had always found real life to be a little less black and white. Sometimes you had to do what you had to do in order to survive.

"Very good," he answered, "Continue to do what you can for him, Viz, but for the time being, I want you to keep him sedated. You can use some of the supplies we took from the lab."

Viz frowned, arching one eye ridge in question. "That hardly seems necessary," he murmured quietly. "He is already unconscious."

"Yes, but he could wake at any time," Alpha countered firmly. "We cannot risk him coming to and causing trouble."

Viz slowly shook his head. "I doubt he would cause much trouble even if he does wake," he argued calmly. "He has several broken ribs, damaged lungs, and badly bruised legs. It is unlikely he can even manage to sit up on his own, let alone get out of bed."

"It doesn't matter," Alpha returned shortly, allowing his impatience to slip into his tone. "We are in a precarious situation, and until I know more I cannot afford any potential distractions."

Viz let out a small sigh, reluctantly nodding his head in agreement. "Very well," he stated softly. "Perhaps keeping him sedated is not such a bad idea after all. It will allow his body time to heal without any undue stress."

Alpha gave a sharp nod of approval, glancing down at the still figure one last time before turning and heading for the door. "Do not grow too attached to him Viz," he called back over his shoulder. "If he survives, he may prove to be an asset, but he may just as well turn out to be an enemy. We will deal with him accordingly either way."

With those final words he left the room, closing the door firmly behind him.

TBC

_Well, there you are. Hopefully many of you will be feeling much better about this story now. :) I almost ended the chapter with Raph, but decided to give you this last section. Your welcome. Hope you guys liked it, and as always, I appreciate your thoughts on it..._


	5. Chapter 5

_Hey all! Sorry about the long wait for this chapter. Life hasn't been all that kind to me lately. But, you didn't come to hear about that, you came to read the story, so without further ado…_

_Thanks once more to NeoMars for looking this chapter over for me…_

* * *

Something was wrong.

Michelangelo lay on his side in the med lab bed, fighting to ignore the persistent ache in his head and clear his thoughts enough that he could figure out what it was that was nagging at him. It wasn't easy. He'd had headaches before, but they were nothing compared to the throbbing pulse currently echoing inside his skull. Even with the painkillers Donnie was giving him the headache never completely went away, just faded to the background a little. The constant pain made it hard to concentrate…to think.

He had no idea how long he had been in the med lab, but he knew it had to have been several days now. He had spent most of that time asleep, unable to stay awake for more than a few minutes at a time. He was still a little fuzzy about what had happened to him. Something about an explosion in the tunnels. Every time he woke up and asked about it, his family would explain it to him again in the overly patient way of someone who had answered the same question over and over again. He felt like he was finally beginning to retain bits and pieces of their story, but he still couldn't shake the feeling that he was missing something...something important.

It was frustrating to say the least. Even more frustrating was the fact that no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't remember a single thing about the night he had been injured. In fact, his last clear memory was of playing video games with Raph after a particularly intense morning training. When he had told his brother that, Raph had given him a funny look, explaining that that particular memory was from nearly two weeks ago. It was disconcerting, having lost so much time. Donnie said the memories might never return, but that he should consider himself lucky he had lost only a couple of weeks instead of months or even years.

Mikey let out a small sigh, reaching up to lightly finger the edge of the bandage wrapped around his head. He supposed he really had been lucky. His family hadn't told him how close he had come to dying, but he didn't need them to. He could pretty much guess from the way they acted around him. He could see it written all over their faces, read it in the way they hovered around him, someone always by his side every time he woke.

Most telling of all was Raphael. Mikey had woken up not once, but twice to find Raph gripping his hand firmly in his own. He normally would have teased his older brother about it, but he found the gesture far too comforting, and somehow he sensed that Raph was pulling as much comfort from it as he was. His brother seemed tense and nervous, his smiles never really reaching his eyes and his conversation a bit forced and stilted. Mikey had thought Raph would relax a little once his brother realized he was recovering just fine, but if anything Raph only seemed to grow more tense every time Mikey saw him.

It was strange. But then again, his whole family was acting a bit strange. He hadn't really noticed it until now. Not too surprising, considering he had been pretty much out of it for the last couple of days. But now he was slowly starting to recover, able to stay awake for longer periods of time and able to force his aching mind into at least some semblance of functionality. The more he became aware, the stronger he got the sense that something just wasn't quite right.

Take Donnie for example. His brother was currently sitting at his computer desk across the lab, his back turned to the bed, his posture stiff and unmoving. Mikey had been observing him quietly for the last several minutes, ever since he had woken up. Donnie sitting in front of a computer wasn't anything unusual, but Donnie sitting in front of a computer that wasn't even turned on, staring blankly at its dark screen for long minutes at a time…that was a different story.

Mikey knew that it could just be that his brother was tired. After all, he knew Donnie's propensity for exhausting himself whenever it came to caring for a sick or injured family member. But something told him Donnie's behavior was due to more than just exhaustion. It was almost like he was looking at a ghost of his brother, or some sort of projection, as if Donnie wasn't really there at all. It was a disturbing feeling, and he didn't like it one bit.

Donnie and Raph weren't the only ones who had been acting strangely. The last time Mikey had woken up he had found April sitting beside his bed, tears streaking silently down her face, her gaze locked on something unseen in the distance. She hadn't even realized he was awake until he had touched her hand. She had become extremely flustered then, giving him a large fake smile and babbling on about having just watched a sad movie with Casey. She had been unable to meet his eyes though, and Mikey suspected she had been lying to him.

Even Master Splinter had seemed more worn and withdrawn than usual.

'_What about Leo?'_

Mikey frowned, shifting slightly in the bed as he fought to remember when the last time was he had actually seen his oldest brother. He couldn't be certain—his memory was still a bit hazy—but he didn't think he had seen Leo at all since he had first woken up, He knew it was possible that his brother had been by sometime while he was sleeping, but he still found it strange that he hadn't seen him at all while awake. Leo was somewhat of a mother hen, and when one of them was injured he tended to hover.

A feeling of unease began to creep over him as he tried to come up with likely explanation for his oldest brother's absence. He found himself straightening slightly in bed as a sudden thought struck him. What if he hadn't been the only one to be injured in the explosion? What if Leo had been caught up in it as well?

He felt his stomach churn with apprehension at the thought. He suddenly had the mental image of Leo lying in his bed upstairs, pale and weak from unknown injuries. The more he thought about it, the more it made sense. It would certainly explain his brother's absence. And of course the rest of his family would have kept it from Mikey, not wanting to worry him when he was fighting so hard to recover himself. It was why they were all acting so strange. They weren't just worried about him; they were worried about Leo too.

Mikey swallowed hard, his hands unconsciously twisting in the blanket around his waist. He was right, he just knew it. What he didn't know was just how badly hurt Leo really was. He guessed it had to be pretty bad for the rest of his family to be acting the way they were. He felt the beginning stirrings of panic, his wild imagination supplying him with unwanted images of Leo lying with an arm or a leg missing. The very thought was enough to make him feel physically ill. He needed to know what was wrong with his brother, and he needed to know now!

He turned to call out to Donnie, but before he could speak the lab door swung open and Raphael entered carrying a tray. Donnie jerked from his silent trance, half rising from his chair before Raph waved him back down.

"April made us some sandwiches," Raph stated quietly. "She said I needed to make sure you ate at least one." He glanced over at the bed, blinking in obvious surprise when he found Mikey awake and staring back at him. "Hey there, knucklehead," he called out with the same air of false cheer that had surrounded him the last few days. "You hungry?"

Donnie's gaze flew to Mikey when Raph spoke, nearly dropping the tray he was in the process of taking from his brother. His expression showed a mixture of surprise and chagrin. "Hey Mikey," he called. "Uhh, how long have you been awake?"

Mikey shook his head slightly, choosing to ignore both their questions and instead asking one of his own. "Raph, where's Leo?"

Raph had been making his way over to the bed, but at Mikey's question he froze, his eyes widening, looking for all the world like a deer caught in headlights. Behind him, Donnie dropped the tray of food to the surface of the desk with a loud clang, his body tensing, his expression mirroring that of Raph's.

Their reactions only confirmed to Mikey that something was definitely wrong, and he felt the bottom drop out of his stomach.

Raph licked his lips nervously, glancing quickly over his shoulder at Donnie who was still standing frozen in place. With obvious reluctance he returned his gaze to the bed. "Mikey…" he began, then paused, swallowing hard. "Look bro, right now you just need to focus…"

"Where is he, Raph?" Mikey interrupted, wincing as his own loud voice sent a shard of pain through his aching skull. He hadn't meant to raise his voice, but his panic was slowly beginning to get the best of him. Leo had to be in pretty bad shape if his brothers were trying this hard to hide it from him.

Silence descended over the lab, both his brothers staring at him mutely. Mikey stared back as forcefully as he could, trying to ignore the fear twisting in his gut. It dawned on him suddenly that Raphael looked afraid, which of course caused his own fear to skyrocket. Raphael _never_ looked afraid…he had learned to hide that particular emotion at an early age, and he was disturbingly good at it. But not today.

For his part, Donnie looked as though he would rather be anywhere else, his hands twitching nervously at his sides, his gaze flashing back and forth between Raph and Mikey. There was something in his eyes…that lost emptiness that Mikey had read in his posture earlier…that was somehow even more disturbing than Raph's fear.

"He got caught in the explosion too, didn't he?" Mikey asked, unable to stand the silence, his voice tuned lower this time. "How bad is he hurt, Raph?"

Raph let out a long and shaky breath, his head bowing as he dropped his gaze to the floor. "Mikey," he began, everything about his posture screaming of reluctance and fear. "Bro…I—I don't really know how to tell you this…" He lifted his head, his eyes meeting Mikey's, their amber depths swirling with sadness and pain. "You…You're right, Leo _was_ caught in the same explosion as you..."

Mikey felt his heart pounding heavily within his chest. As certain as he had been that he was right, a large part of him had been hoping he was wrong. He felt his fists bunch in the blanket around his waist, his eyes glued to Raphael's. "How bad?" he grated out, not at all certain he was ready to hear the answer.

Raphael's entire frame seemed to shrink beneath the weight of Mikey's question, his gaze once more turning down to the floor. "Mikey," he whispered, his voice low and broken. "Leo…Leo didn't…he didn't make it, bro."

Mikey stared at his brother's bowed head, for a moment unable to comprehend what it was that Raphael was saying. "Didn't make it?" he repeated dumbly, blinking over at his brother, his brain struggling to make sense of the words.

"He's gone, Mikey." Don's voice was soft, his face twisted with grief. "We…there wasn't anything we could do and he…he's gone..." He trailed off, his gaze also dropping to the floor, his shoulders slumping as though beneath a heavy weight.

Mikey found his gaze drifting back and forth between the two defeated figures of his older brothers, for the moment forgetting how to even breathe. He felt frozen, his mind unable…or unwilling…to accept what it was they were trying to tell him. "No," he hissed in denial, shaking his head, oblivious of the shards of pain echoing from his skull.

Raph looked up at him, the expression on his face one Mikey had never seen before and hoped to never see again, lost and broken. "The explosion caused part of the ceiling to collapse," he explained quietly, his voice sinking down to Mikey as though from a great distance. "A portion of it fell on him. There was nothing we could do." His voice had taken on a pleading quality, begging Mikey to understand.

"No," Mikey repeated, still shaking his head even as he pushed himself weakly into a sitting position, ignoring the pain and dizziness the movement ignited. His chest felt so tight he was finding it difficult to breath, his own hammering heartbeat loud in his ears. He didn't believe his brothers. He _couldn't_ believe his brothers. There was no way Leo was gone. It just wasn't possible. He didn't know why they would be saying this to him, but they were wrong. They _had _to be wrong.

Donnie and Raph were looking at him sadly, their faces holding mirroring expressions of grief and pity.

"I'm sorry, Mi…" Donnie began to say, taking a single step forward, but Mikey didn't let him finish.

"NO!" he shouted yet again, the single word repeating itself over and over again inside his brain, like a broken record that refused to be turned off. "No, no, no…" He began struggling to get up, determined to go and find Leo himself…to prove to his brothers that they were wrong and this was just some horrible mistake. He felt the pull of the IV Donnie had secured to the inside of his left elbow and viciously yanked the needle out, uncaring of the splash of red it left behind. He tossed the blanket aside, swinging his legs down to the floor and pushing himself to his feet.

"Mikey!" Raph warned, starting forward, "I don't think you…"

Whatever else his brother was going to say was lost to Mikey as a wave of intense dizziness swept over him. The room swirled and swayed around him, the angry pulse in his head keeping time with the pounding of his heart, his vision graying out around the edges. Stubbornly he tried to keep going, but was only able to take a single step before his legs gave out on him, sending him crashing towards the floor.

He never hit. Raph caught him almost as soon as his legs buckled, his brother's strong arms snaking around him and easing his downward fall. Raph gently lowered him the rest of the way to the ground, kneeling beside him. A moment later Donnie was there as well, kneeling down on Mikey's other side, his face filled with concern, one hand reaching out to grip Mikey's shoulder.

"Let me go!" Mikey shouted, ignoring the fact that Raph's arms around him were the only thing keeping him from falling flat on his face. He struggled against his brother's hold, his movements weak and uncoordinated. "Don't touch me!" His vision was beginning to blur, and at first he thought it was because of the severe pain in his head. Then he felt the moisture on his cheeks and realized he was crying.

"Come on buddy," Raph's voice was rough and pleading, his grip never loosening. "Don't do this, Mikey. Please don't do this."

Mikey ignored him, continuing to struggle weakly against his hold. His mind kept replaying his brothers' words to him over and over again. _'He's gone.' 'Ceiling collapsed…' 'Nothing we could do.'_

He let out a cry, the sound filled with pain and denial. It was the sound of an injured animal, and he felt both Donnie and Raph flinch beside him. He didn't care. If Leo really was gone, he didn't care about anything. He suddenly sagged limply in Raph's arms, his body unable to keep up its struggles, his breaths coming in ragged gasps. "No," he repeated one last time, as if by continuing to deny it he could somehow keep the horrible truth at bay, at least for a while longer. He didn't think he could face it right now. He didn't think he was strong enough. Already he felt himself unraveling, like a tattered blanket slowly being undone.

Raph and Don were both talking to him, murmuring soft words that he was sure were meant to be comforting, but his mind couldn't comprehend what it was they were saying. He stared straight in front of him, his mind's eye conjuring up mental images of his eldest brother.

Leo practicing a kata in the dojo, his movements smooth and graceful, his face set in an expression of concentration.

Leo sitting at the dining room table, a small smile playing around the edges of his mouth as he watched his brothers arm wrestle for the last slice of pizza.

Leo leading them across the city rooftops at night, his blue bandana tails whipping out behind him, his movements swift and purposeful.

A soft hand resting gently against his cheek brought him back to the present and he blinked his watery eyes, surprised to find his father kneeling in front of him. It was Splinter's hand on his cheek, his father's face a mere foot in front of Mikey's own.

"Michelangelo," he whispered softly, the thumb of his hand stroking gently against Mikey's wet cheek.

"Sensei," Mikey croaked, his voice coming out weak and cracked. "Tell them it's not true. Tell them Leo's not dead. Tell them…" His voice broke, and he found he couldn't continue, his throat far too tight.

Splinter gazed at him sadly, his thumb never ceasing its gentle caress. Finally he spoke. "My son. My dear Michelangelo," he whispered softly. "I would do anything to spare you this pain. I would do anything to bring your brother back. Gladly I would have given my life for his just so you four could be whole once more. But alas, fate does not always allow us to choose our own destiny."

Mikey bowed his head, the weight of his father's words pressing down on him like a heavy blanket. His mind still didn't want to accept that Le was gone, but he knew without a shadow of a doubt that his father would never lie to him. Certainly not on anything this important. Nor would his brothers for that matter.

He felt something tear deep inside him, the wound deep and painful, and he couldn't hold back a broken sob. He felt Raph's arms tighten around him even as Donnie's hand firmly gripped his shoulder, both brothers offering whatever broken support they could in their own grief.

"Did he…" Mikey began, then cut off, unsure how to voice his question but desperately needing to hear the answer.

It was Raphael who finally answered, somehow understanding Mikey's unspoken question.

"No Mikey," he whispered, his voice shaky and rough. "When the ceiling fell on him, he…he was killed instantly. He didn't suffer, buddy."

Mikey felt Donnie's grip on his shoulder tighten slightly at Raph's words, his brother making a soft sound in the back of his throat. If he had looked up at that moment he would have seen an unspoken communication passing between his two older brothers, but he was too weighted down with his own grief to even lift his head.

He nodded mutely, allowing his head to fall sideways until it was resting against Donnie's plastron. Any relief he felt at his brother's words was buried beneath his grief, and he felt the tears flowing hard and heavy from his eyes.

Together the four remaining members of the Hamato clan knelt on the floor of the med lab, clinging tightly to one another, trying desperately to hold on to the last shards of their broken family.

* * *

"I am not happy Stockman. Not happy at all!" Oroku Saki was not shouting, but the menace in his voice was unmistakable.

Baxter Stockman studied the floor, his hands gripping the armrests of his wheelchair, his scowl carefully hidden from his master. His master. He had to forcefully hold back a growl at the thought of that word. He was perhaps the greatest genius of his time, and yet he was reduced to bowing and groveling at the feet of this arrogant bastard. Oh how he hated it!

"Nearly a year of research and experimentation, and what do we have to show for it?" Saki continued, his voice tight with rage. "Nothing!"

Baxter dared lift his head at that, glancing up at the raised dais at the end of the room. "We know the mutation formula works," he argued.

Saki glared down at him, and it was all Baxter could do not to drop his head again. "The formula?" the other man sneered. "Do you mean the formula that was stolen from beneath your very nose? That formula? Unless you are telling me you can recreate your work without it…?"

Baxter did drop his gaze this time, shaking his head slightly in response. The formula had taken over ten months to perfect and was extremely complex. There was no way he could recreate it without his notes…notes which had disappeared from his lab after the creatures' escape, along with the extra canister of mutagen he had prepared. He could only hope the fail-safe he had rigged on the canister had activated, keeping the precious substance from falling into the wrong hands. Which, in this case, were any hands other than his.

As much as he hated to admit it, he knew his employer was right. They were back to the drawing board, so to speak, and of course, he was the one to take the blame for it all. It was so unfair.

"Perhaps we can still locate the creatures," he offered into the sudden silence, this time keeping his head bowed, though it grated on his pride. There was no room for pride when confronting Saki. He had learned long ago that pride could very easily get him killed. "If we can find them, we could proceed with the plan. It might not be a total loss."

Saki didn't reply right away, and Baxter found himself holding his breath nervously. Finally the other man spoke. "I have Karai and the Foot out scouring the city for them as we speak. Personally it is my belief that they are long gone by now. If we are unable to locate them soon, I will have no other choice but to call off the search. I have better things for my men to do than traipsing around the city in search of your lost puppies." The last word was spat out with contempt, and Baxter felt his jaw clench, inwardly seething.

Oroku Saki certainly hadn't called them _puppies_ when he had visited the lab a little over a week ago. He had been impressed and well pleased with Stockman's creations, his eyes shining with a greedy light as he had observed them. He had given Stockman the go ahead to proceed with the next step of the plan…wiping the creatures of their memories and thus creating a blank slate that Saki could use to train and mold them as he pleased…into mighty warriors for his Foot Clan. Stockman had taken extra care in creating the drug that would erase their memories, combining it discreetly with the sedatives he was already using to keep the creatures under control.

Unfortunately, before he had been able to move forward with his plan, his prisoners had somehow managed to escape. He had no clue how they had managed it. The drugs he had been given them should have kept them too weak and lethargic to even attempt escape, and yet somehow they had. The only thing Stockman could think of was that the creatures had developed an immunity to the sedatives, all the while tricking him into believing they were still working. Undoubtedly the idea of the one they called Alpha. Stockman had always found the ex-army captain to be a little too clever for his own good.

In the end it didn't really matter how they had managed it. All that mattered was that they had. If he had it to do all over again, Stockman would definitely make sure he had some fail safes in place to guard against any escape attempts. As it was though, he doubted Saki would give him the time and financial backing to repeat the project, despite the promise it had shown.

"You are dismissed, Stockman," Oroku Saki growled from his seat up on the dais, pulling him from his dark thoughts. "You may go. If my ninjas manage to find the animals, I will summon you, but in the meantime you are to stay low. I will undoubtedly have another project for you in the near future, so be ready."

Stockman bowed his head in acknowledgement. "As you say, sir," he replied, keeping his voice steady and even, hiding the boiling rage simmering in his veins. He longed for the day when he would have the power to rise from Saki's shadow and show the world who he really was. That moment would eventually come, but for now he had to bide his time and play the part of the obedient servant.

It was all a means to an end, nothing more.

* * *

The man was scared. Terrified really. It was apparent in his shaking limbs, the way he kept nervously licking his lips, and the gaze he couldn't' seem to tear away from Alpha's face. He was trying his best to act tough, squaring his shoulders in the age old attempt to make himself somehow look bigger, but even so he was nowhere near the size of Alpha, and all the posturing in the world wouldn't change that fact.

Alpha regarded him coolly, not acting threatening, but neither making an effort to allay any of the man's fear. Right now fear was power. For the first time he felt as though his mutation was something more than a curse. He never would have been able to accomplish what he was about to attempt as a mere man.

"L-look," the man stammered. "I..I don't know what you want with me, but I ain't got any money."

Alpha cocked his head to one side, opening his mouth in a small grin that revealed a line of razor sharp teeth. The man's reaction was immediate, flinching backwards, his eyes widening. "Do I look like someone who would be in need of money?" Alpha murmured quietly, arching an eyebrow at his nervous guest. "I had you brought here for a different purpose, Trenton Valero."

The man gaped at him at the use of his name, his tongue darting out once more to lick at his lips, his eyes flashing about the small room as though searching for a way to escape. "How do you know who I am?" he demanded hotly. "Why did you kidnap me? I'm warning you…I have powerful friends who will be looking for me…."

Alpha let out a low chuckle. "Powerful friends, huh?" he mused. "You wouldn't be talking about your fellow gang members, would you? The Red Hand I believe you call yourselves?"

Trenton stared at him with wide eyes, his hands twitching nervously around his waist, undoubtedly missing the switchblade that Two Toes had relieved him of before delivering him to Alpha. "That's right," he finally stated, puffing out his chest slightly in a mock show of bravado. "I see you've heard of us. Believe me when I say, you don't want to mess with us, dude, so I suggest you let me go right now, and I'll forget this ever happened."

Alpha let out a snort, barely stopping himself from rolling his eyes at the boy's stupidity. "I'm terrified, I'm sure," he murmured, his tone practically dripping with sarcasm. "The truth is, Trenton, you don't have a gang. Not really. You have a bunch of punk kids and amateur street thugs who like to _pretend_ to be a gang. The truth is, if you disappear they probably won't even think twice about it. They'll just go out and find another wannabe has-been to lead them."

Trenton's face flushed a deep red, his hands clenching into fists at his side, but he was too fearful of Alpha to attempt to make a move on him. "Oh yeah, whatta you know?" He spat angrily.

Alpha didn't answer immediately, taking a few moments to observe the young man. He definitely had potential. Even obviously terrified he was doing his best to stand up to Alpha when many a man in his position would have been cowering in the corner soiling themselves. He had a bit of a smart mouth, but then again, that was only to be expected. All together he wasn't quite as pathetic as Alpha had originally been expecting.

"What do I know?" he repeated Trenton's question, his voice low and deadly. "I know that you will never be taken seriously. I know that if I let you go now you'll return to your so called gang and continue to be a nothing, a nobody, a joke." He straightened from his crouch, towering over the man, his eyes narrowing as he stared down at him. "But I'm prepared to offer you something more, if you have the brains to listen."

Trenton shifted nervously, his face still flushed with anger, but most of his bravado fading in the shadow of Alpha's monstrous form. "What the hell are you talking about," he demanded, his voice gruff.

Tilting his head to one side, Alpha didn't bother answering. Instead, he posed his own question. "What is it you want, Trenton? What is your greatest desire? Is it power? Respect? Prestige? Is it to have a name that is known throughout all of New York…a name that is revered and feared? A name to rival even that of the infamous Purple Dragons?" Alpha paused, his eyes narrowed as he stared down at the young man. "I can offer you all of that, Trenton. Power and respect and more. Much more. The choice is yours. Are you interested in hearing me out, or would you rather go back to your so called gang and "forget this ever happened?"

Trenton stared at him silently for a few long moments, his expression an interesting mixture of anger and fear…and also a faint glimmer of curiosity. He glanced to the door, shifting one foot in that direction, his gaze on Alpha the whole time, as though waiting for him to leap forward to stop him.

Alpha merely sat back on his haunches, watching the young man idly, as though the boy's decision made absolutely no difference in the world to him. If Trenton decided to leave, Alpha wouldn't try and stop him. He didn't need to. He had Two Toes and the twins standing guard outside, and they had their orders. Without the proper signal from him…Trenton would never make it back to the flimsy excuse of a bar they had taken him from. It was unfortunate, but they couldn't afford any loose ends right now, and perhaps his successor would be a little more open to Alpha's plans.

Trenton took another small step toward the door, but then paused, staring at Alpha for several long moments, his expression revealing his inner battle between fear and interest. Finally he gave a small shrug of his shoulders, his narrowed eyes fixed on Alpha's face. "Okay," he muttered softly, "I'm listening."

* * *

Viz watched from the shadows as their human guest was escorted from the warehouse by one of the twins. When he had come in an hour earlier, he had looked terrified, now he merely looked contemplative.

"All is going according to plan."

Viz turned to regard Alpha as his old friend moved up beside him. He felt the faint stirrings of unease within his chest, but was careful not to let it show. During his time as a soldier he had followed Alpha through some pretty crazy things, but he couldn't help but think his leader's latest plan was on a whole new level of insane.

"He has agreed to follow you?" he asked softly.

Alpha gave a small shake of his head. "Not yet, but he will. And others will follow."

Viz nodded slowly. "I do not quite understand what it is that you hope to accomplish with this," he admitted softly, glancing back in the direction the young man had disappeared.

Alpha let out a small grunt, turning and walking down the corridor, Viz easily keeping pace beside him. "There is strength and anonymity in numbers, my old friend," Alpha stated simply. "Both of which we need if we are to remain here in the city. By uniting the scatter gangs, we can build ourselves our own little army. We provide them with strong leadership and protection, and they in turn provide us with an outlet in which to accomplish our goals. It is as simple as that. I will see those who have wronged us pay for what they have done."

"You mean Stockman?" Viz asked, sparing his friend a sidelong glance.

Alpha let out a snort. "Stockman was merely the latest, but certainly not the first. You of all people should know, old friend. This whole city abandoned and betrayed us long before Stockman turned us into monsters. Before, they ignored us, now they will learn to fear us. And with fear comes power. Make no mistake, Victor, it is the gangs that run this part of the city, not the rich bureaucrats on Wall Street or the pompous suites sitting in the government buildings. Once we control the gangs, there will be no limit to what we can achieve."

Viz frowned slightly, noting the wild light in his friend's eyes. He recognized the look from their days serving together in the army. Alpha was set in his chosen path, and nothing Viz could say would deter him. Viz wasn't after power or revenge. For him, survival was enough. Still, he would follow Alpha no matter where the other might lead. He owed his friend far too much to allow for anything else.

"How is our guest?" Alpha asked suddenly, surprisingly turning the subject, as though aware that the whole thing was making Viz uneasy.

Viz shrugged. "He is starting to fight the sedative," he replied easily. "I believe he is beginning to develop a resistance to the drug, just as we did. It has been just over a week and already he has come close to waking up several times. It is a good sign, I think. He is young and strong. I expect, given time, he will make a full recovery."

Alpha made a low rumbling sound deep in his chest. "For the time being I want you to keep him under. Up the dosage of the sedative if you have to. I am not yet ready to deal with him. Give me another week, two at the most, and I will have my plan well under way. Then we can see what this mutant turtle has to offer us."

Viz sighed, nodding his head in reluctant agreement. He had been expecting the command, and though he wasn't thrilled about it, he would obey. He wasn't sure what it was about the injured turtle that so intrigued him, but ever since he had witnessed him fighting on the rooftops, his curiosity had been piqued. He was anxious to talk to the mutant. But Alpha was right. For now the plan must come first. The time to learn more about their guest would come later.

* * *

Darkness and Pain.

They were his two companions, as close to him as his own skin, keeping him company through the endless passage of time. He hated their persistent touch, and yet they were all he knew. He couldn't remember anything beyond them. He had no idea how long he had been here, floating in this black abyss, but time had long since lost meaning for him.

Occasionally he would sense light, hovering somewhere just out of reach. The light brought with it the soft sound of voices, along with the distant sensation of touch. The pain was greater near the light, and yet he would always struggle toward it anyway, desperate to escape his dark prison. Desperate for something new…something different.

Yet no matter how hard he tried, the light eluded him. Whenever he felt he was drawing near, the darkness would rear up and envelop him once more, dragging him back into its black embrace.

He was losing himself. The longer he spent in the darkness, the more of his very essence he could sense fading away, like smoke on a breeze, molding itself with the dark until it was indistinguishable. He began to despair that he would ever find his way out. There was nothing he could to. He was powerless to stop it. The darkness was an enemy he could not defeat.

Pain and darkness.

Darkness and pain.

It was a never ending loop, a repeating pattern that went on and on, just like the questions echoing around inside his head.

'_Where am I?'_

'_How did I get here?'_

And the most pressing question of them all.

'_Who am I…?'_

TBC

_Well, I hope you liked it. It was a bit of a set-up chapter so not a lot of action, but it picks up pace soon, I promise. At least Mikey is awake now and knows about his brother. Please let me know your thoughts. They are what drive me forward when the world gets rough! And as always, thanks to everyone who has already reviewed, favorited, and followed. I can't tell you enough how awesome you all are to me!_


	6. Chapter 6

_A huge thank you again to everyone who followed, favorited, and especially reviewed. I can't say it enough…Thanks Guys! Hope you enjoy the chapter…_

* * *

"Raphael, I wish to speak with you my son."

Raph reached out and steadied his swaying punching bag, glancing over his shoulder to look at his father standing in the doorway. He felt his stomach do a slow flip.

"Hai, Sensei," he replied softly.

Splinter disappeared from the doorway, and Raph stood silently for several long minutes, his heavy breathing the only sound in the otherwise silent dojo. Finally he shook himself into motion, reaching for the white cloth he had sitting nearby and using it to wipe his skin free of the sweet accumulated from hours of heavy workout. He had been looking forward to a nice long shower, but now it would have to wait.

Tossing the cloth aside, he left the dojo and stepped into the main lair, his senses immediately assaulted by the heavy silence of the place. Quiet had become the new norm around here over the last several months. The TV sat dark and silent, its normal audience hiding away somewhere upstairs in his room, pretending to read the same comic book for the hundredth time in a row. The door to the lab was firmly closed, the occupant inside either working on a project or sitting silently at his desk, staring numbly off into space. There were times when Raph felt like he was the only one living here now. It was hard to imagine that there had once been a time when he had wished desperately for a little peace and quiet. Now, he would give anything just to have things back the way they were before.

With a small sigh, he moved across the lair and over to Master Splinter's room. The sliding door had been left partially ajar in expectation of his arrival, and he slipped soundlessly inside without bothering to knock. Master Splinter stood on the far side of the room with his back turned to Raph, his hands nimbly pouring tea into two small saucers sitting on the dresser in front of him.

Raphael moved over to the low table sitting in the middle of the room, kneeling down on the thick carpet arranged for just that purpose. Almost against his will he found his eyes straying to the sword displayed prominently on the table against the far wall, the naked blade draped with a slip of bright blue cloth.

'_Is this all that is left of you, Leo?' _he thought sadly, watching as the lights from the candles danced and played across the steel of the blade. A single sword and a spare mask; it seemed somehow an inadequate memorial to the brother and leader who had meant so much to them and whose absence now left a gaping hole in their lives. And yet it was all they had left of him.

That and the memories.

It was the memories that haunted Raph the most. Lately he found his thoughts going back to when he and Leo had been younger, recklessly exploring the sewers together without a care in the world. They had been the closest of friends, and Raph regretted that he had allowed circumstances to come between them in later years. It was like he could suddenly remember every harsh word and cruel insult he had leveled at his older brother over the last few years, and the words haunted him mercilessly. There had been times when he had found himself wishing his brother would just go away. Now, he would give anything to have him back, even if only long enough to tell him just how much he had meant to Raph.

He shook himself free of his dark thoughts as Splinter moved over to the table, effectively blocking his view of the sword. His father carefully placed two cups of tea on the low table before sinking down to kneel across from Raph. Their eyes met and held for a few moments before Raph looked down, gazing into the murky contents of his tea cup.

"How have you been sleeping, my son?" Splinter asked suddenly, his tone soft and compassionate.

Raph glanced up in surprise at the quiet question, his shoulders lifting in a slight shrug. "As well as anyone," he answered simply. He felt no need to tell Splinter about the reoccurring nightmare that occasionally interrupted his sleep…the same one that had visited him right after Leo's death and still sent him racing for the bathroom even now, over three months later. He knew the dream was only his subconscious trying to deal with the guilt of leaving his brother behind. They would fade eventually, or they wouldn't…either way Raph felt they were a small penance for what he had done.

Splinter stared at him silently for a few moments, his dark eyes searching. Just as he often did when talking with his father, Raph felt as though the other's gaze was boring straight into his soul, uncovering his deepest secrets and unveiling all his hidden fears.

"And what of your brothers?" Splinter finally asked, breaking the silence before it could become too uncomfortable.

Raph didn't answer right away, staring down at his tea cup. He couldn't help but wonder how many times Leo had knelt in this very position, answering questions about his brothers' well-being to their Master. Probably more times than he could imagine. The funny thing was, he suspected Splinter already knew the answers. He just wanted to make sure that Raph knew them as well.

"Mikey's still having nightmares, but they're not quite as bad," he finally answered, looking up and meeting his father's steady gaze. "I think he is finally getting some real sleep. Physically he's looking better anyway. Donnie's been doing okay—at least whenever I can get him out of his lab and up into his bed. Honestly, right now I think any trouble they may have sleeping is coming from too much time spent inactive than anything else."

"Ahh," Splinter nodded his head, his dark eyes shining in the soft glow of the candles. "A very astute observation, Raphael. I too have noticed this, which is one of the reasons I have called you in here today." His father let out a deep sigh, reaching out and taking a sip from his tea cup before continuing. "It is my belief that it is time to resume our daily schedule of practice and meditation. What do you think, my son?

Raph was somewhat surprised that his father was seeking his opinion. He frowned slightly, thinking over Splinter's suggestion and weighing the possible consequences. Mikey was still healing and as such would need to take things easy, but he was well enough that light exercise wouldn't hurt him. As for Donnie…it would be good for his brother to get out of the lab.

Honestly, Raph felt it would do them all good to find their routine once more and gain back some semblance of normality. The first few sessions would be hard, driving home the absence of the eldest, but Raph knew it was a necessary step in learning how to heal and move on. Without it, he feared they would all merely fade away in their grief.

"Hai, Sensei," he answered firmly. "I think that would be a good idea."

Splinter nodded, lifting his cup and taking another small sip. "Very good. We will inform your brothers this evening at dinner."

"What of patrols?" Raph asked quietly. It might have been his imagination, but he thought Splinter flinched slightly at his question. But a moment later he was as calm and collected as ever, carefully replacing his tea cup on the table before him.

"Let us see how practice goes first, then we can discuss the possibility of resuming nightly patrols," he replied easily.

Raph held back a small sigh. He hadn't been to the surface in three months and was beginning to feel the restless tension that usually accompanied long periods of being forced to remain under ground. Normally he would have snapped by now, sneaking out on his own or else taking out his frustration on his family. But times were different now…_he_ was different. Leo's death had been like a douse of cold water to the flames of his soul. He could still feel the embers there, smoldering slowly, waiting for the right moment to fan back into flame, but for the first time in his life he actually felt like _he_ controlled the fire in his blood instead of it controlling him. It was a disconcerting feeling, almost as though he had lost a part of who he was. He tried to tell himself that it was a part he could well do without, but it didn't stop it from hurting.

As if reading the direction of his thoughts, Splinter spoke from across the table. "Much has changed in our lives now, my son. The Hamato clan has been knocked off balance. And yet it is my belief that together we can find new balance, and that we will be all the stronger for it in the end." Splinter paused, his dark eyes boring into Raph with a bright intensity. "Over the last few weeks I have watched you step into the role of leader, my son, and I must say it has warmed my heart."

Raph cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably and dropping his gaze back down to the table and his untouched cup of tea. "We haven't really done anything for me to lead them," he argued weakly.

Splinter let out a small huff. "Come now, Raphael. Surely you know that being a leader is much more than guiding your brothers outside the lair. It is in the small, day to day stuff as well. The way you make sure Donatello is getting enough rest, and that Michelangelo is eating. The way you are there for your brothers whenever the grief becomes too great and they need a shoulder to lean on. The way you continue to train your body every day even when it is not required of you. All of these things are signs of being a leader. You have held yourself together when all those around you are falling apart. It shows great strength, and I am proud of you, my son.

Raph swallowed hard, his chest tight. His father's words warmed him, but he couldn't help but feel unworthy of the praise. "I promised Leo," he replied simply, as though that explained everything. In a way, it did.

"Yes," Splinter's voice was soft and filled with compassion. "Your brother knew you would be the one to take his place. He had faith in you, as do I."

Raphael looked up at his father, finally letting some of the despair he had been feeling sink into his expression. "I won't ever be as good as he was," he whispered quietly, feeling the truth of those words deep in his heart. Leo had been born to lead, whereas Raph had been thrust into the role. Sure, a part of him had always wanted the position—the same part that had felt jealous when Leo had been the one named leader. He had never wanted it this way, though. It was a heavier weight than he had ever imagined.

"You will be _different_ than he was," Splinter contradicted softly, "but that does not mean you will not be good."

"I'll do my best, Sensei," he vowed solemnly, making the promise as much to himself as to his father.

Splinter's gaze softened. "That is all I ask, my son. When the time comes to lead your brothers to the surface once more, I know you will be ready. I know you will protect them."

Raph felt his eyes narrow, his hands unconsciously moving to grip the hilts of his sais. "With my life, Sensei," he replied evenly. "With my life…"

* * *

Donnie used the edge of the balustrade for balance as he gracefully swung his legs up and over the side, landing silently on the rooftop beyond. Almost as soon as his feet touched the ground he tipped his head back, breathing in deeply. A cool breeze played across the rooftop, caressing his face and sending his bandana tales curling and dancing out behind him. The breeze was filled with the typical smells of the city, but there was a wet, crisp scent beneath it all that promised of coming rain.

A soft thump from beside him had him turning in time to see Mikey land on the rooftop next to him. His brother immediately mirrored Donnie, tilting his head back and taking in a deep breath of air. Donnie understood the gesture. Four months was a long time to be stuck underground. It felt good to be breathing fresh air again.

A moment later Raph joined them on the rooftop. He didn't pause to breathe in the air as Donnie and Mikey had, but then again he had already been up to the surface a handful of times over the last few weeks to meet with Casey, so this wasn't so new to him.

"Stay alert," Raph ordered in a very Leo-like manner, and Donnie had to force down a sigh, biting his tongue to keep from reminding Raph that they were on April's roof, not in the middle of Purple Dragon territory. He wondered if overprotectiveness was a required characteristic in the job description for leader. He had grown used to it in Leo, but was still trying to adjust to seeing it so prevalent in Raph. His older brother had changed quite a bit in the last several months, but then again, Donnie supposed they all had. Raph was merely trying to do his best in the role that had been thrust upon him, and Donnie wasn't about to make it any harder on him. Leo had left some pretty big shoes to fill, and he didn't envy his brother the position at all.

A wave of sadness washed over him, just as it always did when his mind led him to thoughts of his oldest brother. The pain of the loss was still sharp enough to physically hurt, but at least Donnie was past the point of running from thoughts of Leo. Now he merely accepted them when they came, realizing they were inevitable. He had done some reading up on grief and loss, and he knew a day would eventually come when the memories would bring more than just pain. A day when he could think about the good times he'd had with Leo and actually smile instead of feel like weeping. He wasn't there yet, but he clung to the hope it would eventually come.

A clatter from across the roof suddenly drew him from his thoughts, and he reacted instinctively, reaching behind him to grab his Bo staff and dropping down into a defensive crouch. From the corner of his eye he saw Mikey doing the same, his entire body tense and ready.

"Relax guys," Raph grunted, moving forward calmly to stand a few paces in front of them. "It's just Casey. I'd recognize the noise he makes from a mile away."

Donnie slowly straightened, keeping his staff held before him at the ready. A moment later the shadows across the roof slowly materialized into the tall shape of their human friend. Casey had his mask pulled down low over his forehead, his telltale bag of hockey sticks and baseball bats swung casually over one shoulder.

"Heya, guys," he called out in greeting, moving close enough to exchange a light fist bump with Raph. "Glad you could make it. Cleaning up the streets at night hasn't been the same without ya." He gave Donnie and Mikey a wide, welcoming grin.

"Hey Casey," Mikey replied, tucking his nunchucks away inside his belt. "Did you happen to find that shirt while you were out cleaning up the streets? If so, I suggest you throw it back in whatever dumpster you pulled it from. Pink really isn't your color, dude."

Donnie turned to stare at his brother in surprise while Casey sputtered his objection…something about the shirt being maroon, not pink. Donnie didn't really pay attention. He was pretty sure that this was the first time he had heard Mikey even attempt making a joke in over four months. Their once vibrant and full of life brother had become much more quiet and subdued, his infectious joy and playful attitude smothered beneath his grief. Donnie missed the old Mikey fiercely, and now, seeing even this small hint of humor from their little brother was a lot like glimpsing a ray of sunlight after months of rain. Almost without realizing it he felt a genuine smile…the first in quite a while…stretch the edges of his lips.

"I have to agree with Mikey on this one, Jones," Raph joined in, and Donnie could tell from the spark in his brother's eye that Raph had missed the fun-loving side of their little brother as much as he had. "It definitely looks pink to me."

"April gave me this shirt," Casey huffed in indignation.

Mikey let out a doubtful snort. "Are you sure you didn't just borrow it from her closet?"

Donnie felt his grin grow even wider, and he was having a hard time holding back his laughter. In Casey's defense the shirt really was more of a maroon color than pink, but Donnie didn't bother speaking up in his defense. He was enjoying the light banter far too much. He felt the throbbing ache that had set up residence around his heart loosen slightly, and it kind of surprised him. He'd begun to think he would never smile again, let alone laugh.

"Whatever," Casey growled, crossing his arms defensively across his chest, but Donnie could see the twinkle in the man's eyes that he was trying hard to hide behind a scowl. "Do you guys want to stand here and insult me all night, or should we actually try to accomplish something?"

"Yeah, alright," Raph grunted, though the ghost of a smile still lingered across his features. "Why don't you tell Donnie and Mikey what you told me last night?"

Casey dropped his arms, moving over to lean casually against the edge of the balustrade. "There's a new gang in town," he stated without preamble. "They've taken up territory in the upper Bronx area. They call themselves the Wolf Men, and no one really knows where they came from. It's almost like they sprung up overnight."

Donnie frowned, his mood instantly turning serious. In a city like New York, gang activity was unavoidable. Scatter gangs could be found on just about every block, but every now and then something larger and more organized would form, taking over whole sections of the city. The Purple Dragons were the largest of such gangs, ruling their territory through fear and intimidation. Donnie knew immediately that this new gang had to fall into the same category as the Dragons, otherwise Casey wouldn't have bothered mentioning them.

"What are the police and media saying about them?" He asked curiously.

Casey gave a single shrug. "Not much more than what I just told you. At first I think everyone thought they were just a bunch of punk kids dressing up in Halloween costumes and tagging buildings. By the time they realized it was something bigger, the gang had already settled in. Thanks to last year's cutbacks, the police are already understaffed and outnumbered. They've increased patrols in the area after dark, but I can't say it seems to be doing a whole lot of good. Already two businesses have been burned to the ground and several citizens have ended up in the hospital. The people up there are scared, which I'm sure is precisely what the gang wants."

Mikey let out a heavy sigh, looping his thumbs in his belt. "Great. Just what this city needs…another gang," he muttered sourly. "Any idea who's behind it? Big gangs like this don't just spring up on their own…usually they have a mastermind running things from the shadows."

Casey shook his head. "If there's a mastermind, no one knows who he is. Last week the police managed to apprehend two of the gang members they suspected were pretty high up in the ranks. They questioned them for hours, but the punks refused to squeal. Then when the cops went to transfer them to Bayview Correctional Facility, the van they were in was attacked on route." Casey shuddered, his expression darkening. "I saw the pictures, guys. The van they were in was completely shredded. It literally looked as though it had been tore into pieces by something with really sharp claws. Both prisoners escaped and the officers escorting them were injured. They'll survive, but one of them won't be looking in the mirror anytime soon. The officers all reported the same thing…that giant, wolf-like creatures attacked them. It was dark though, and I don't think their story is getting much credit."

Donnie frowned, feeling something niggling at the back of his mind, but before he could chase the stray thought down, Casey continued.

"It gets worse. Their territory has been steadily growing larger, expanding south at an alarming rate. By my estimation, if things continue the way they have been, they'll reach 16th street sometime within the next couple of months."

Donnie felt his eyes widen at that news. "Sixteenth Street is the edge of the Dragon's territory," he muttered, sharing a meaningful look with Mikey.

"Exactly." Raph spoke up for the first time, his hands gripping the hilts of his sais where they rested in his belt. "If that happens, we're looking at the potential for a territorial gang war."

Mikey let out a snort. "Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe they'll both just kill each other off and save us and the police the trouble…"

Casey was shaking his head vehemently. "Gang wars are _never_ a good thing, Mikey. They're violent and bloody, and the worst part is it's the innocent citizens that usually get caught up in the cross-fire. I know you've never witnessed one yourself, but believe me when I say, the people of the city will be the biggest losers if something like this goes down."

"Okay, so what exactly are we supposed to do to stop it?" Donnie asked grimly. This was their first night out on patrol in over four months, and _this_ was what got dropped on their plates? It somehow didn't seem fair. Donnie certainly didn't feel prepared for it. When it had just been the four of them against the Dragons they had already been laughably outnumbered. Now the odds were even more against them.

No one immediately stepped forward to answer his question, and the silence grew uncomfortable. Mikey was shifting his feet restlessly, staring at the ground. Casey had his bottom lip between his teeth, his expression frustrated. Raph was staring out across the city, his eyes narrowed in thought.

It was his older brother who finally broke the silence. "No one's been able to stop these guys. They keep growing and growing because no one is standing in their way." He turned to glance at Donnie and Mikey, his eyes glinting with a determined light. "I say we change that. The Purple Dragons already know who we are. I say we find these so-called _Wolf Men_ and introduce ourselves. You guys with me?"

Donnie exchanged a quick glance with Mikey, not missing the gleam that suddenly appeared in his little brother's eyes, or the way his hands moved down to clutch the handles of his weapons. Mikey was eager for battle, and obviously Raph was as well. Donnie had always been the most reluctant fighter of his brothers…not because he was afraid, but more because violence never really sat well with him. He enjoyed creating things, not destroying them. Still, he wasn't blind to the need to act when it came. Raph was right…no one else was able to do anything about this new gang, which meant it fell to them.

'_What would you say if you were here, Leo?'_ he wondered idly, but just as quickly knew the answer. He knew exactly what Leo would say. This city was their responsibility. They were its guardians. They might not be able to do much, but they certainly couldn't just stand by while it was threatened.

Donnie felt his own hand tighten on his staff, his gaze moving over to meet Raph's. "Well, what are we waiting for…?"

* * *

They didn't make it all the way up to the Bronx that night.

A robbery in progress on Thirteenth Street interrupted their plans. A group of over a dozen Purple Dragons had broken into the back of an electronics store and were busy emptying it out into the back of their van. It was sheer luck that Mikey had been looking down as they leaped over the alleyway, otherwise they might have missed it. The Dragon's weren't their intended target for the night, but once they saw what was going on, there was no way they could just pass on by.

Mikey gripped the familiar handles of his nunchucks, feeling the pre-battle adrenaline race through his blood. It had been too long since they had been in a fight and he was excited, though also a bit nervous. It wasn't that the Purple Dragons scared him…there weren't _that_ many of them. It was more the fact that this was their first fight as a new team…a team without Leo. It made everything feel somehow…off.

If his brothers or Casey shared his feelings, they didn't show it, their faces a neutral mask of readiness. Raph waved them forward with a single flash of his hands, and without a word they dropped soundlessly down into the dark shadows at the end of the alley. The Dragon's continued their looting, completely unaware of the disaster about to befall them.

Raph made the first move, stepping out from the shadows, his sais spinning lazily in his hands. "How many times do we have to tell you filth, it's not nice taking things that don't belong to you." His voice rang out strong and loud, easily carrying to the group of thieves at the other end of the alley.

The result was almost comical. The group of thugs all froze simultaneously, their gazes snapping toward Raph, their eyes widening in alarm. Stolen equipment was quickly lowered to the ground, and weapons were drawn…anything from knives to crowbars to baseball bats. There were undoubtedly a few guns present as well, but the Dragons usually refrained from using those if at all possible, not wanting to draw unwanted attention to themselves.

"Piss off," a rough voice growled in response as one of the larger thugs stepped forward, brandishing a wicked looking switchblade in each hand. He was obviously the leader of this particular group, and his dark eyes were filled with hate as they stared down the alley at Raph. "I see the rumors about you freaks weren't true."

Raph gave a nonchalant shrug. "I don't really listen to rumors," he replied evenly, "so I couldn't tell you."

"You're supposed to be dead," the large man spat, "either that or long gone from the city."

Raph let out a grunt. "Nope, not dead," he answered easily, "and as for leaving the city…sorry pal, there's far too much trash to be taken out here." He lifted one hand in a signal and Mikey stepped forward from the shadows to stand beside him, Donnie and Casey mirroring his movement on Raph's other side.

The group of Dragons shifted their feet restlessly, eying them with barely veiled trepidation. Only the large man with the blades showed no sign of fear, his dark eyes sweeping across them calculatingly before coming back to rest on Raph. "Aren't you one short?" he asked dismissively. "Where's the blue freak?"

Mikey felt his breath catch, his grip on his nunchucks tightening at the thugs flippant question. Beside him Raph's sais suddenly stopped their spinning as his brother's entire body tensed.

"Enough talk," Raph growled, his tone tight with anger. "Let's do this." With no further warning he launched himself forward, and without hesitation Mikey followed in his wake. From the corner of his eye he saw more Dragon's pouring out into the alley from inside the store.

Leaving Switchblade for Raph, Mikey veered to the left, expertly blocking a wooden bat being swung for his head while simultaneously sweeping the thugs legs out from under him. A practiced snap of his wrist sent the end of his chucks against the fallen man's head, and the goon was out like a light. Mikey leapt over him easily, his weapon wrapping around a knife being jabbed toward his midsection even as he twisted and sent a side kick into the face of a third opponent. A rough jerk of his hand and he disarmed the knife wielder, causing the man to stumble forward only to be sent tumbling backwards with a well-aimed kick to his stomach.

The battle grew more heated as the minutes flew by. There had been more goons hiding inside the store than any of them had realized. Still, Mikey wasn't too concerned by the heavy odds against them. If it had been the Foot they might have been in a little more trouble, but the men of the Purple Dragons were, for the most part, untrained hooligans. Still, what they lacked in skills they made up for in strength and determination. They were men who had lived hard lives, and they certainly knew how to take a beating and just keep coming.

With a whirling spin of his nunchucks, Mikey cleared an open space around him, then took the moment of freedom to locate Casey and his brothers. Casey and Donnie were fighting back to back on the far side of the alley and seemed to have everything well under control. Raph was directly in the center of the alley, surrounded by enemies on all sides, but not seeming the least bit concerned. Perhaps it was all the long months spent cooped up down in the lair with nobody to hit, but Raph seemed even more of whirlwind of destruction than he normally was. The blades of his sais were painted red with blood, and there was a wild gleam in his eyes that set his enemies back on their heels. It was quite the sight to behold.

Even as he watched, Raph's gaze snapped in his direction. Mikey saw his brother's eyes widen, and in the next instant Raph was throwing a shuriken straight at his head. Mikey instinctively ducked, pivoting smoothly in time to see the throwing star embed itself in the hand of a Purple Dragon who had used his moment of inattention to sneak up behind him. The man had been about to bash his head in with a crowbar until Raph's shuriken found it mark, causing him to drop the weapon and howl in agony. Mikey put the goon out of his misery with a quick punch that sent him crashing back into the alley wall.

"Thanks, Raph," Mikey called, turning back to give his brother a quick smile.

Raph growled at him.

Actually growled.

"Pay attention to what you're doing, dumbass," he snapped in reply, using a spin kick to dispatch two thugs who had strayed a little too close.

Mikey blinked, then found himself suddenly grinning at his brother's response. It had been a long time since Raph growled at him. In a strange and messed up way, it actually felt…good. It almost felt like old times, like he was seeing his real brother again for the first time in months. It gave him hope. Hope that despite everything they would be alright.

Leo was gone, and Mikey missed him terribly. He would _always_ miss him. But lately he had been unable to shake the thought that if his oldest brother could speak to him, he would undoubtedly be urging Mikey to find a way to move on past his grief and start living again. It was hard…the hardest thing he had ever had to do, but he had made a silent promise to his brother's memory that he would at least begin to try.

Tonight, he felt for the first time like he might actually succeed.

Feeling lighter than he had in quite some time, he turned back to the battle, letting a small smile twist across his feature and a taunt rise to his lips. "Hey, Neanderthal, over here…."

TBC

_Well, I wasn't originally going to leave it there, but since I'm going away for several days I decided to let you guys have a new chapter before I left. Aren't I nice? _

_Thanks again, everyone. Don't forget to leave me some feedback. Come on…push the button below. You know you want to! I'm not above holding Leo hostage until you do…_


	7. Chapter 7

_Hello everyone! I am so, so sorry for the long wait between updates. I had honestly thought the end of the school year would bring more time to write, but the exact opposite has happened. This chapter has been brought to you through the work of late nights and stolen lunch breaks. As such, it's not my best, but I didn't want to keep you waiting any longer. I will do my best to update more regularly in the future, but I can't promise I will be able to each week. _

_Thanks again to NeoMars for her beta work. Check out her new story 'Fruit of the Vine.'_

_Warning: This chapter contains a bit of language and some gore. Not too bad, but a little. _

* * *

Blade crouched low, eyes narrowed as he warily watched his opponent stalking steadily closer. There was something dark in Two Toes eyes, something that promised certain pain if he let himself get cornered and within easy reach of those sharp claws. Luckily he had no intention of letting that happen. He kept in constant motion, circling slowly, forcing his opponent to turn along with him. Anytime Two Toes got too close, he danced back out of the way, still keeping up his constant circling.

After several minutes of this cat and mouse game, Two Toes paused, straightening up to his full and impressive height, growling harshly with anger. "Enough of this nonsense," he hissed, "stop running like a scared rabbit and…"

He never finished. It was the opening Blade had been waiting for. In the split second Two Toes let down his guard to taunt him, he darted forward, dropping low onto one hand and sweeping his legs out in a powerful arc that took his opponent's legs out from under him. Quick as lightening he was back on his feet, but instead of darting away, he moved in, taking advantage of the other's lost balance. Just as Two Toes was beginning to push himself back upright, Blade delivered a powerful side-kick that landed square in the center of his chest, sending him flying backwards into a stack of wooden crates.

If he had been fighting a normal opponent, that would have been the end of it. Unfortunately his adversary was anything but normal. With a howl of unbridled rage, Two Toes was back on his feet and charging forward.

Blade barely managed to dodge the wild swing aimed for his head, taking the blow on his shoulder instead. His arm instantly went numb, and he let out a grunt as he was sent tumbling to the ground. Only instinct saved him from a savage kick to his head that would have probably put his lights out for a good long time. He rolled away from the blow, reaching out and grasping Two Toes' ankle and using all the force he could muster to throw the other off balance.

His maneuver worked. Two Toes teetered on one foot for a single moment before crashing backwards. Blade quickly jumped to his feet, then threw himself forward onto Two Toes' back just as the wolf was attempting to rise. Using his legs to lock his opponent's arms to his sides, he wrapped one arm around the wolf's throat, clasping his wrist in his other hand to lock his arms in place. The muscles in his arms bulged as he squeezed, hanging on for dear life as Two Toes bucked and writhed beneath him, desperately trying to dislodge him.

"Enough!"

The order rang through the air of the warehouse, filled with such authority that Blade instantly responded, releasing his opponent and dropping down to the floor. Two Toes whirled to face him, his face a mask of pure fury, and for a moment Blade felt certain the other was planning on attacking him, despite Alpha's order.

Two Toes took a step forward, and Blade tensed in preparation, ready to defend his life for real this time. But a moment later Viz was suddenly there between them, seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

"Well done," he stated evenly, laying a long clawed hand on Blade's shoulder, completely ignoring the seething Two Toes standing directly behind him. "You get better each time."

Blade gave a small shrug, smiling slightly at the other's praise. The hardest part had been learning to fight without thinking, to just let his body respond without conscious directive. It was no easy task, but he did feel as though he was getting better at it. Of course, it became a bit easier when he felt the threat was real. He cut his eyes toward Two Toes, gingerly rotating his bruised shoulder.

Two Toes stared at him with narrowed eyes before flashing a feral grin that showed every tooth in his wide mouth. "I look forward to our rematch," he growled lowly, the look on his face sending shivers down Blade's spine. Then the black wolf turned and strode away, quickly blending with the dark shadows of the warehouse.

"Well done." Alpha called from several paces away, drawing Blade's gaze. The tawny wolf was studying him with dark, calculating eyes, and as he often did when in the pack leader's presence, Blade couldn't help but feel somewhat like a bug under a microscope. "Viz is right, your skills are improving. It is not just anyone who can hold their own against Two Toes. Impressive."

Blade bowed his head respectfully toward the pack leader, humbly acknowledging the praise while simultaneously wondering why the same words from the pack leader didn't bring him half as much warmth as when Viz had said them.

"Go and get some rest," Alpha ordered, beginning to turn away. "You will accompany Viz again tonight on the raid. Be ready."

"Yes sir," Blade replied, glancing over at Viz who was observing him mildly. The gray wolf gave him a lopsided grin. "So, another night out on the town. Whatever shall I wear?"

Blade let out a short laugh, shaking his head in amusement. "Come on, I'll help you pick something out," he answered lightly, returning his friend's grin. He followed Viz through the dusty corridors of the warehouse to the small office they shared as a room. Viz strode right in, but Blade paused, catching his dim reflection in the bank of windows that made up the top portion of the door.

He stared at his image for a long moment, searching the green features for any spark of recognition. He found none. He might as well have been staring at a stranger, the eyes looking back at him from beneath the dirty blue mask blank and empty.

"_Who am I?"_

The answer lay tantalizingly out of his reach, hidden behind the black fog that had taken up residence inside his mind. He had tried over and over again to pierce that fog, desperate for the answers that evaded him, but all to no avail. He could remember nothing. Not a single memory. Not even a name. He was a stranger inside his own mind. All he knew was what Viz had told him; that he had been injured when a tunnel collapsed in the sewers deep beneath the city. Viz had saved him, and though his injuries were all but healed, without his memory he couldn't help but feel broken and un-whole.

He tried to tell himself it didn't matter. Whatever his old life had once held, it was now gone, and he was beyond hoping it would ever return. It had been months since he had woken in this very room, disoriented and in pain, his mind struggling desperately to come up with answers that simply would not come. He had been frightened of Viz at first, but the gray wolf had soon gained his trust with his calm presence and gentle care. He had barely left Blade's side at all while he was recovering, caring for and tending to his injuries without complaint. He had given Blade his new name and a new life, and wasting time regretting the loss of his old one would do him no good. He had decided it was time to move on…to move forward.

Viz had told him his own story of being captured and mutated by the scientist Stockman. Without any memories of his own, Blade could only assume that he shared a similar story. Perhaps Stockman had been responsible for his own mutation. He didn't know, and neither did Viz. But after hearing some of the horror stories from his friend, he felt almost glad that he couldn't remember.

With a small sigh he tore his gaze from his reflection, moving around the door and stepping into the small room. Viz was in the far corner, rooting around in the small trunk where he kept the medical supplies. Blade ran his hand absently over the inside of his right elbow, his fingers trailing along the needle tracks that left his skin slightly bumpy and tender.

He moved over to the small pallet that made up his bed, sinking down on it cross-legged, still absently rubbing at his arm. His gaze fell on the single sword that lay tucked up against the edge of the bed, its hilt wrapped in the same blue cloth that made up his mask. He resisted the urge to reach out and touch it, to feel the hilt pressed into his palm. Whenever he held the sword, it felt as though the black fog in his mind gave way just a bit.

The sword was his, of that he had no doubt. It fit his hand too perfectly, like an extension of his arm rather than the weapon it was. Using it came as naturally as breathing…he didn't even have to think about it. The first time Alpha had asked him to practice with it he had surprised them all with his skill and mastery of the weapon. It was the only remnant he carried with him from his old life aside from his mask. He never felt as complete as when he was carrying it, though the sense that there was something else missing never left him.

"Are you ready for tonight?"

Viz's questions pulled him from his thoughts, and he glanced across the room toward his friend. The gray wolf was still kneeling over the old trunk, but now he had a small syringe in one hand, gently tapping the side to rid it of any bubbles.

Blade shrugged. "Ready as always," he replied easily, his expression hiding the lingering doubt and apprehension he always felt when thinking about their raids.

He wasn't particularly fond of the stealing, and he most certainly didn't like the violence that the rest of Alpha's gang members seemed to crave. And yet he was careful to do his part. He owed Alpha and the others that much. They had saved him from near certain death, cared for him when he was weak and injured, and continued to provide for and protect him. On his own he certainly never would have made it this long. The least he could do to repay them was carry his own weight. And, if he was completely honest with himself, he knew that he craved their acceptance and approval. It provided him with a sense of belonging and purpose that he felt lost without.

With Viz it was easy. He seemed to honestly like Blade, accepting him without question and taking him in under his wing, like an older brother caring for a younger sibling. It felt nice.

It was different with the others. Alpha seemed friendly enough on the surface, but he remained always a bit cool and withdrawn. Blade couldn't shake the feeling that the pack leader was still trying to decide whether or not the unasked for addition to their pack was worth the trouble or not. It was one of the reasons Blade was so determined to prove himself useful to the lead wolf. He didn't want Alpha to think he had made a mistake by saving him.

Two Toes was already of that opinion, and he made no effort to hide his feelings. He didn't like Blade, plain and simple. Of course, Blade wasn't sure that Two Toes liked _anybody_, so he tried not to take it too personally. As for the twins, they treated Blade like an interesting distraction, never openly hostile like Two Toes, but not overly friendly either.

Good and bad, they were his family now…all he had, and Blade felt a sense of loyalty towards them. He was determined to prove himself to them, and hopefully, eventually, they would all come to accept him as readily as Viz had. It was all he could hope for. He was a freak in a world full of humans, and only with other freaks could he ever hope to make his home. He didn't want to be alone.

Viz rose and moved across the room, holding the syringe out before him. Without thought Blade lifted his arm, twisting it so the inside of his elbow was facing up. He barely felt the sting of the needle as it entered his skin, he was so used to by now. He let out a soft sigh as the warm sensation spread out from his arm to encompass his entire body. He settled back against the blankets, letting his eyes drift closed.

* * *

"Mmmm. There's nothing in this world as good as April's homemade burritos." Michelangelo leaned back in his chair with a satisfied sigh, rubbing his hand contentedly over his belly. "Well, except maybe pizza." He added with a thoughtful twist to his head.

April shook her head, giving the youngest turtle a mock stern look. "Why Mikey, flattery will get you nothing." She grinned as she added, "except maybe some fresh-from-the-oven chocolate chip cookies."

Mikey sat upright with an eager smile.

"Seriously, Mikey?" Donnie moaned from across the table. "You already ate three burritos. How can you even _think_ about dessert?"

Mikey looked at Donnie, smiling impishly. "There's always room for at least one cookie, bro."

"Yeah, well you'd better be able to keep up on patrol tonight," Raph growled from beside his brother. "Cause we aint waiting for you to waddle along."

Mikey let out a long sigh, turning to face April. "Can you believe they've lived with me for seventeen years, and still they doubt me?" He shook his head in disbelief. "Bring on the cookies, mademoiselle. We'll show them…"

April laughed, rising from her chair and moving toward the kitchen, sharing a quick smile with Casey as she moved past. She was so glad she had done this tonight. It had been a long time since she'd had the turtles over for a meal, something that had once been a regular occurrence. She had wanted to invite them before, but the timing just hadn't seemed quite right until now.

She had missed this. The friendly banter and light laughter of the evening had been perfect. Sure, there was still an air of sadness and loss hanging over them all, moments where Leo's absence struck a painful cord. For instance when the turtles had first arrived and all eyes had immediately gone to the chair where he had always used to sit. Or when April had placed a container of chopped black olives on the table, forgetting that Leo was the only one of them who ever ate them.

But fortunately those moments were few and far between, and overall she would have to rate the evening a success.

It seemed her friends had finally turned a corner in their grief, and for that she was extremely grateful. It had been hard watching them so lost and hurting. She knew the pain was still there, but they were learning how to accept and live with it. It was good to see them smiling and laughing again.

She grabbed a plate from the cabinet, then moved over to the stove and the pile of cookies she had left on the cooling rack. She was in the process of loading up the plate when Casey came in with a load of dirty dishes. Depositing them in the sink, he moved up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. April let out a soft sigh, sinking back into the warmth of his embrace.

"This was a good idea tonight, babe," he murmured in her ear, the arms around her waist squeezing gently. "I think the boys really needed it."

"I think I needed it as well," April admitted, leaning her head back to rest on Casey's strong shoulder. "You know we could rent a movie and just hang out and relax tonight. It's been a while since we've done something like that." She didn't want to admit it, but she didn't want the evening to end.

Casey let out a soft sigh, his warm breath tickling the hair on the back of her neck. "That sounds really nice, babe, but I don't think Raph will go for it. He's a turtle on a mission, and I don't think he'll stop until he's accomplished what he's set out for."

"Which means you guys are heading up to the Bronx again tonight?" She sighed, resignedly placing the last of the cookies onto the plate. Casey and the boys had been scouting out the territory of the new gang, the Wolf Men, and so far they hadn't run into any of the gang yet. But April knew it was only a matter of time before that changed.

"Yeah," Casey answered lightly. "So far we've managed to look in all the wrong places at all the wrong times, but I have a good feeling about tonight."

April felt herself tense despite herself. "Just be careful," she whispered, gripping the edge of the cookie plate with a white knuckled grip. "Please."

She tried her hardest not to worry too much when the boys were out on patrol. After all, they did this type of stuff all the time. But ever since Leo, her fear and worry had only grown. She didn't think she could stand the pain of any more loss. And now that Casey had re-arranged his working schedule so he could patrol with them each night, she had one more person to worry about. She was surprised her hair hadn't turned completely white with all the stress she carried around with her now.

Casey could sense her tension, and he leaned closer, nuzzling her neck. "Don't worry, babe," he assured her gently. "It's just a bunch of punk kids that need to be taught some manners, that's all. We'll be careful, I promise."

April nodded, taking a deep breath and firmly pushing her fear down. Casey gave her one last encouraging squeeze before releasing her, and together they carried the plate of cookies back out into the dining room.

They found the atmosphere in the room very different from when they had left. The lighthearted banter had ended, and now the three turtles sat silent and reflective. Raph was playing with one of his Sais, Donnie was staring blankly off into space, and Mikey was whirling the water in his glass around and around, a small frown digging furrows between his eyes.

April held back a small sigh. She should have known the light mood was too good to last. After all, she had seen this time and time again over the last several months. Things would be going along smoothly, and then something would happen to bring back the weight of grief and loss. It would hang in the air around them, palpable in its intensity. Most of the time it wasn't even anything noticeable that brought it on, merely a stray thought or a careless word. April was still trying to get used to this new quieter and more contemplative side of her friends. Back when Leo had still been with them, it had _never_ been quiet. It was hard to believe she actually missed all the noise. The silence carried with it too much pain, and she found she no longer cared for it as much.

"I brought the cookies," she announced into the silence.

Mikey looked up and smiled at her, but it was lacking its normal brilliance. "Thanks April," he murmured softly.

April smiled at him sadly, resting her arm gently against his shoulder. "I made them just for you, Mikey," she shared quietly, earning a more genuine smile that she promptly returned. "So eat as many as you like."

* * *

The supply warehouse was located at the end of a dimly lit street, protected by a high fence with mounted security cameras. A lone watchdog patrolled the grounds outside while two armed security guards kept watch within.

It was too easy.

The fence was easily scaled and the security cameras skillfully avoided. As for the watchdog; all it had taken was a single whiff of the mutants' strange scent and he had retreated to the farthest section of the yard, cowering beside a small wood shed. This left the two guards inside.

Viz crouched low atop the roof of the warehouse, peering down through a skylight at the scene taking place below him. He watched as Blade melted into the shadows, becoming all but invisible as he silently made his way toward the security desk and the unsuspecting guard currently monitoring the security feeds. The guard never even knew the turtle was there until Blade's sword was pressed against his neck. Viz watched as Blade leaned over and whispered something in the man's ear. With a shaky hand, the guard reached out and flipped a switch, causing the video monitors to go dark. A moment later he slumped forward against the desk, clearly unconscious, though Viz had not seen Blade strike him.

It wasn't the first time Viz had watched this scene play out, yet he continued to be impressed by the skill and stealth displayed by his young companion. Even Alpha had come to admit that the turtle was extremely useful when it came to their supply raids. He was able to get them into their target locations much quicker and quieter, which in turn afforded them more time to get what they needed and get out before the authorities showed up.

As silently as he had come, Blade melted back into the shadows, disappearing deeper into the warehouse in search of the second security guard. Viz sat back to wait, knowing it wouldn't take the young mutant very long.

Sure enough, less than ten minutes later Viz caught Blade's scent on the air a few moments before the turtle materialized on the roof next to him.

"We're clear," Blade stated without preamble as Viz rose to meet him.

"Any trouble?" Viz asked steadily, moving toward the edge of the roof.

Blade gave a small snort, falling into step beside him. "No," he answered simply. "We'll be done here and long gone before they wake up."

"Good." Viz stopped at the edge of the roof, lifting the small flashlight he had been carrying. Aiming the flashlight down the deserted street he flashed it on and off several times. A moment later the lights of a large van on the far end of the street flashed on in reply before slowly rolling forward toward the warehouse gates.

"Who's escorting the humans?" Blade asked curiously, crouching down on the edge of the roof and observing the approaching van.

"Tarin," Viz answered easily, also watching the van closely. With the sharp eyes afforded him by his mutation he could just make out the dark brown wolf clinging to the vehicle's sideboard. Tarin was slightly larger than his twin, Talon, which was the only way Viz could tell the two apart.

The van pulled up to the gates and rolled to a stop. Viz watched as Tarin jumped down from the vehicle and strode boldly up to the gates. A heavy chain and padlock secured the entry, but with a powerful jerk of his arm Tarin easily removed that particular barrier. The gates were pushed open and the van moved forward toward the warehouse.

A small sigh from behind him had Viz turning to regard Blade. The other mutant was staring down at the dimly lit street, his expression one of uncertainty.

"Is there a problem?" Viz asked softly.

Blade glanced at him, then just as quickly turned away, shrugging one shoulder. "No," he answered quietly.

Viz grunted, not accepting the other's answer for a single moment. The truth was he knew perfectly well what was bothering the young turtle.

"We do what we must to survive," he stated simply, repeating the same words he had been told time and again by Alpha when he had voiced his own doubts. He knew Alpha was right, but he also knew that it didn't help much with the feelings of guilt.

"I know," Blade answered simply, his tone subdued.

"We did not ask for this life," Viz went on, observing his companion closely, "but it is what we have, and we must make the most of it. The sooner you accept that, the better off you will be." He allowed a hint of warning to enter his tone. While Blade's reluctance and doubt didn't particularly bother him, he knew that it wouldn't go over so well with the others, especially Alpha. The kid needed to be careful.

Blade lifted his head and met Viz look with a steady gaze. "I understand," he stated evenly, his expression earnest. "Don't worry. I will do my part."

Viz nodded. "Good," he stated, turning back to observe the van down below. It had pulled up to one of the many loading bays along the side of the warehouse and several men were piling out, preparing to begin the loading. The men were laughing and calling back and forth to each other as though they were at a party rather than in the middle of a potentially dangerous raid. Viz scowled, his mood turning suddenly sour.

"Let's get out of here," he grunted, turning from the edge of the roof and heading toward the fire escape that would lead back down to the ground. "Tarin and the rest of the boys can handle this."

Blade looked surprised, turning to follow Viz across the rooftop. "You want to head back already?" he asked, the reluctance in his tone unmistakable.

Viz shook his head. "Not back," he replied succinctly. "The night is young and there's a whole lot of city out there. I say we go explore a bit."

Blade visibly perked up at this suggestion, his expression eager. "Really?" he asked hopefully, falling into pace beside Viz.

Viz shrugged. "Why not," he replied. "We'll keep to the rooftops and out of sight. You haven't been out of that warehouse except on these missions. It's high time you had a night of fun."

Blade grinned widely. "No argument here," he agreed cheerfully.

A few minutes later found them back up on the rooftops, but this time moving away from the warehouse. So intent were they on the path ahead of them, they completely failed to notice the four shadowy figures making their way down the street below them, heading straight for the warehouse they had just left behind.

* * *

"I told you that van looked shady," Mikey whispered triumphantly, peering over the lid of the dumpster toward the nearby warehouse and the robbery currently in progress. "But you guys didn't want to believe me, did you? Noooo. You thought I was crazy…"

"We're here, aint we," Raph growled in response, casting Mikey an annoyed glare. He wasn't about to admit that he _had_ doubted his little brother and had only agreed to follow the vehicle out of a lack of any other ideas. Mikey would be rubbing this in for the next several days as it was.

"Do you think these goons are part of the Wolf Men?" Donnie interjected quietly, his tone carefully neutral.

"We're in their territory," Casey answered from the other end of the dumpster they were currently using for cover. "It's gotta be them."

"Only one way to find out," Raph grunted, grabbing the handles of his Sais and drawing them from his belt. "Let's go ask them." Without waiting to see if his brothers and Casey were following, he strode from behind the dumpster and headed toward the warehouse.

In typical fashion the gang had left a lookout at the gate. The poor kid never saw Raph coming and he certainly never knew what hit him. Once through the gate Raph strode purposefully toward the van, his Sais gripped tightly in each hand. Stealth had been more of Leo's type of thing. He much preferred the straight forward approach—it got him to the action that much quicker.

A second sentry was posted at the front of the vehicle, a thick looking goon who was smoking a cigarette as he leaned against the front grill of the van. He looked up at Raph's approach, his cigarette dangling from between his puffy lips.

"Decided to come down and help, eh?" he grunted, puffing out a cloud of noxious smoke. "The sooner we get out of here, the better. Though I must say, disarming the security system certainly bought us some extra time." He grinned conspiratorially at Raph, taking a long draw on his cigarette.

'_What the hell?'_

Raph was so startled by the man's reaction to him that he stumbled to a halt several paces away, staring in open disbelief. He had expected the punk to react to him in surprise, maybe even shock and fear. He certainly hadn't expected the man to greet him like one of his long lost companions.

"What?" he mumbled stupidly, frowning at the man in confusion.

The thug's gaze flickered past Raph, and he suddenly straightened, his own frown drawing creases in his forehead. "There's more of you?" he gasped, the cigarette dropping from between his lips as he spoke. "I thought there was only one…"

Raph spared a quick glance over his shoulders at his approaching brothers, unsurprised to see the confusion on their faces. They had to be wondering why Raph was merely standing here chatting with the gangster he should have long since knocked into oblivion. Raph turned back to face the man, his grip on his Sais tightening.

"Yeah, there's more of me, asshole," he growled in response. "And we've come to teach you and your pals that it's not nice to take things that don't belong to you."

Raph felt smugly satisfied as his words finally garnered the reaction he had been expecting from the start. The man managed to look surprised, confused, and angry all at once, his hands bunching into fists at his side. "What the hell…?" he began to demand, but Raph was through with the small talk. He stepped forward and slammed the hilt of his Sais straight into the punks face, downing the man with a single blow.

"Okay, that was strange," Donnie observed from directly behind Raph.

Before they could further discuss the now unconscious man's unusual behavior, a shout of alarm sounded from a few feet away. Another gang member had spotted them and the unconscious sentry, and soon cries of warning were echoing through the night.

"Showtime," Casey hollered, reaching back over his shoulder and expertly pulling free one of his baseball bats. "Let's show these boys the discipline they shoulda got from their mammas!"

Raph rolled his eyes, but he couldn't hold back the small smile of anticipation that crossed his features as the cries of alarm brought the rest of the gang members hurrying outside to face off against them. "Ahh man, this is going to be too easy," Raph complained as he made a quick count and realized their opponents numbered under a dozen.

The punks apparently took exception to his remark, because a moment later they charged forward as one, brandishing a variety of weapons, their faces masks of anger. Raph's prediction proved only too accurate, however. Much like the Purple Dragons, the kids in this gang were tough fighters, but not particularly skilled. They didn't stand a chance against three trained ninjas and an experienced vigilante.

Raph hadn't even broken out in a sweat by the time the last gang member fell to a blow from one of Mikey's Nunchucks. The ground was littered with the fallen bodies of their foes, some lying completely still while others moaned and writhed in unmistakable pain. The whole fight had lasted less than three minutes. Far too easy for Raph's liking, especially since they had spent the last week just trying to find these punks. He couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed.

"So what now?" Casey asked, swinging his bat up to rest against his shoulder. "Tag em' and bag em' for the cops?"

Raph opened his mouth to reply, but never got the chance. A massive brown shape moving incredibly fast suddenly materialized from the far side of the van. Raph got a brief glimpse of fur and snarling teeth, and then the creature was on them. One minute Casey was standing at ease a few feet from Raph, and the next he was sent flying away into the darkness, tumbling head over heels, his bat spinning away in the opposite direction.

"Casey!" Raph shouted, momentarily frozen in surprise at the speed of the attack. His eyes widened in shock as he took in the appearance of their newest opponent, now standing where Casey had been mere seconds before.

The creature looked like a strange cross between a wolf and a man, with canine features complete with tufted ears, elongated snout, and sharp teeth. It stood upright on two legs, towering at least three feet above Raph. Its arm's hung loosely by its side, ending in what could only be described as a hideous cross between hands and paws, each finger tipped with dangerously sharp claws. Its entire body was covered in a dark brown fur, and it muzzle was pulled back in a warning growl.

All this Raph took in in the space of a few heartbeats as he instinctually raised his Sais into a defensive position in front of him. "Mikey, check on Casey," he called hoarsely, pushing aside the pulsing fear for his friend so that he could focus on the adversary before him. "Donnie, you're with me."

With a rictus snarl, the creature launched itself toward Raph, claws extended. Only years of training saved Raph from being gutted on the spot as he narrowly dodged away, twisting to one side even as he lashed out with his own weapon. The creature was fast, ducking the sweep of his Sai and striking out with a backhanded blow that would have sent Raph reeling if it had landed. Luckily Raph was able to dodge the blow, but in so doing he suddenly found himself trapped between the van and the massive form of the angry wolf, with nowhere to go.

He might have been in serious trouble then, if not for his brother. Donnie suddenly appeared behind the creature, his Bo staff letting off a slight whistle as it sliced through the air in an arc toward the back of the wolf's head. At seemingly the last possible moment, the creature threw itself to one side, causing the staff to sweep through empty air where its head had just been. Donnie was thrown slightly off balance by the miss, and the creature used the opportunity to sweep out with one of its legs, knocking the purple turtle backwards onto his shell.

With a wordless howl, Raph threw himself forward, driven by the desperate need to protect his fallen brother. He launched into a series of attacks that drove the wolf steadily back and away from Donnie, giving his brother time to find his feet. Raph was certainly sweeting now, throwing everything he had into his attacks, his Sais nothing but a blur as he struck and slashed desperately at his enemy.

He felt a brief flash of satisfaction as he felt one of his Sais strike home, grazing across the flesh on the creature's shoulder. But if the blow phased the wolf at all, he didn't show it. If anything, the cut seemed to only make it more angry. With a howl of pure rage, the wolf launched its own attack, using its greater size and strength to drive Raphael backwards. Raph managed to hold his own for a few moments before a powerful sweep of his opponents hand sent him tumbling backwards. He felt a tearing pain across his upper arm, and then he was landing on his back, blinking dazedly up at the dark night sky.

Once again Donnie came to his rescue, sweeping in and distracting the creature before it could move in and try to finish him. With movements almost too quick to follow, Donnie drove the wolf back, his features locked into an expression of extreme concentration.

Shaking his head to help clear it, Raph struggled to his feet, breathing hard as he glanced down at his arm. He grimaced at the three bloody furrows that traced a path from the top of his shoulder down to just above his elbow, the cuts throbbing mercilessly. His arm was already bathed in a thick coating of blood that slid down his arm, threatening to compromise his grip on his weapon.

Gritting his teeth against the pain, Raph looked up in time to see Donnie being backhanded with enough force to send him flying backwards into the side of the van, the force of the impact rocking the vehicle and leaving a deep dent in its side. Donnie fell roughly to the ground, barely managing to catch himself on hands and knees, his Bo staff clattering away across the pavement.

Raph watched in horror as the creature bounded forward toward his fallen brother, one hand raised to bring down what would surely be a killing strike. Raph desperately launched himself forward, already knowing he would never be able to reach his brother in time to stop that deadly blow. A wordless scream tore from his throat, and in that moment it seemed almost like time slowed down, forcing everything to move in slow motion.

He saw the giant wolf approach his brother with death in its eyes, its sharp claws glinting in the dim light, its mouth pulled back in a hideous snarl. He saw the creature begin to swing its arm downward, the claws aimed for Donnie's bent head.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, Mikey's Nunchuks whirled into view, smacking into the back of the wolf's legs and sending him tumbling forward, his attack on Donnie temporarily forgotten as he brought his arms up in an attempt to break his fall. Though obviously dazed, Donnie had enough sense to roll to one side as the creature toppled forward, barely managing to avoid being crushed beneath the wolf's weight.

Then Raph was there. He didn't have time to think or plan, instead he acted on pure adrenaline. He knew he had just come very close to losing another brother, and the absolute terror of that drove him forward with speed and strength he didn't know he had. He landed on top of the wolf's back with enough force to drive the creature the rest of the way down to the pavement. Then, before his opponent could recover, he drove the blade of his Sai deep into the back of the creature's neck, burying the blade to the hilt and slicing through the spinal cord with ease. He felt the splash of warm blood against his hands as the creature gave a single twitch beneath him before going still, its life blood flowing out into a steadily growing pool beneath it.

The kill had been swift and clean, if not particularly honorable. Raph couldn't bring himself to care. His mind's eye was too full of the image of the creature bearing down on his helpless brother. He had done what was needed to protect his family.

Breathing hard, Raph glanced over at Donnie, who was staring back at him with an expression of shock. Before Raph could ask his brother if he was okay, Mikey was suddenly there, dropping to his knees beside Donnie and wearing a look of absolute terror on his young face. "Donnie, you okay bro?" he asked breathlessly, his eyes anxiously scanning his brother for any signs of obvious injury.

Donnie tore his gaze away from Raph to focus on his little brother, wincing slightly as he rolled his shoulders and arched his neck. "Yeah," he answered softly. "I just got the breath knocked out of me for a moment. I'm okay, Mikey."

Raph let out a small sigh of relief, feeling his shoulders release some of their tension. "Nice throw, Mike," he praised tiredly, the aches and pains from the brief but fierce battle suddenly making themselves known all at once.

Mikey glanced over to him, smiling slightly despite his obvious worry. "And you guys always said I was lousy at target practice." His smile faded as he caught sight of Raph's blood soaked arm, his earlier look of alarm returning full force. "Dude, are you okay?" he gasped, starting to rise from his position beside Donnie.

Raph waved him back down with a dismissive flick of his arm. "I'm fine," he assured his brother. "It's just a few cuts. What about Casey? Is he okay?" He looked around for his friend, breathing out yet another relieved breath when he spotted the man sitting several yards away, his head drooping down between his raised knees.

"He's a little banged up, but he'll be okay," Mikey stated simply.

Raph nodded wearily, then found himself tensing as his ears picked up the sharp wail of sirens. The sound was still distant, but it seemed to be drawing nearer. He didn't know if the sirens were for them or not, but he wasn't planning on sticking around to find out.

"Time to go," he told his brothers evenly, drawing his Sai from the back of the wolf's neck. The blade made a sick wet noise as it slid free, and Raph felt his stomach recoil in response. This wasn't the first time he had killed in the heat of battle, but that didn't make it any easier. The tangy smell of blood filled his nostrils, and he suddenly wanted to get as far away from this place as possible.

Letting Mikey assist Donnie to his feet, Raph quickly made his way over to Casey. Using his uninjured arm he reached down and grabbed his friend's arm, unceremoniously hauling the man to his feet. Casey let out a groan, and Raph quickly moved in close to take some of his friend's weight on himself. "Sorry Jones," he grunted, "but we have to get out of here quick before the cops arrive. Think you can walk?"

"Yeah," Casey muttered, using Raph to help balance himself as they slowly made their way toward the warehouse gate. "You guys all okay?"

Raph glanced over to where Mikey was assisting Donnie, then down at his own blood soaked arm. Now that the fight was over, the pain was returning full force, encasing the entire limb in fire. He realized he was trailing blood from his fingertips and quickly jammed his hand into his belt, hoping it would absorb the liquid so he wouldn't leave a trail that could possibly be followed. "We'll live," he answered Casey shortly, barely suppressing a shudder at the memory of the giant wolf towering over his brother. This night had definitely not turned out the way he had hoped, but at least they were all still alive.

One thing was for sure; they had definitely found the Wolf Men.

TBC

_Thanks again. Please let me know what you thought…good and bad. Cheers!_


	8. Chapter 8

_Thank you again for all your lovely comments and support. A special shout-out to all the guest reviewers; I can't reply to you individually, but know that I love hearing from you and appreciate your comments!_

_Thanks again to NeoMars for her help reviewing this chapter._

_Hope you enjoy..._

* * *

Raphael was afraid of needles.

It was a strange characteristic of his rough and tough brother that had perplexed Donnie for years. How Raph could shake off injuries that would floor most people, and yet flinch every time he even _looked_ at a needle, Donnie didn't know. He had long since categorized this peculiar trait in the "unexplainable phenomenon" category inside his brain.

"We don't have to do this now." Raph stated, his voice carefully nonchalant as he eyed the needle in Donnie's hand from the corner of his eye. "We could just wrap it up and deal with it later…?" he added hopefully.

Donnie paused in the process of threading the needle, casting his older brother a bland look. "So you want me to wait until you pass out from blood loss and _then_ sew you up, is that it?"

Raph cocked his head to one side and actually seemed to be considering it.

"Oh for goodness sake!" Donnie snapped, stepping up to his brother and giving his chest a firm push, forcing Raph down onto the exam table.

Unfortunately, the shove caused his bruised and aching muscles to scream in protest, and he couldn't hold back a small hiss of pain. Of course it was too much to hope that his brothers wouldn't notice. The way they were watching his every move, it would have been _impossible_ not to notice.

"You okay, bro?" Mikey asked worriedly from his seat atop a nearby table. Raph just frowned at him, but his eyes began to do a busy search of Donnie's form, looking for any hidden injury they may have missed.

Donnie let out a tired sigh. "Yes." He replied calmly. "For the hundredth time, I'm fine Mikey. Just a little sore is all."

By "a little" he really meant a lot, but no need to tell his brothers that. He felt like he'd been hit by a van…or more accurately, hit a van. But Mikey had already checked his shell for stress fractures and found none. He just needed to give his muscles a few days of rest and he'd be good as new.

His brothers didn't seem ready to accept that explanation though, and it probably had a lot to do with how close he had come to dying. He had been too dazed after his flight into the van to know how close the mutant wolf had come to ending him, but if the looks of terror on his brothers' faces right after were any indication, it had been far too close. Mikey hadn't let him out of his sight since, and even Raph was acting more protective than normal. It was extremely annoying, especially since out of the two of them, Raph's injuries were by far the more serious.

Yet despite his exasperation, Donnie found he couldn't really blame them for their hyper vigilance. He knew all too well that he would be acting the same if their positions had been reversed. The sense of invulnerability they had all naively walked around with for years had been brutally destroyed by Leo's death. They had all been dealt a terrible lesson in their own mortality. Death had visited them, bringing pain and grief almost too unbearable to stand, and it was something that none of them wanted to ever go through again.

'_And yet death is unavoidable,'_ Donnie thought tiredly, beginning the painful process of cleaning the three deep cuts down his brother's arm. _'We fear it, and yet we cannot escape it. Perhaps it is our inability to accept it that makes the fear that much stronger.'_

His mind was pulled from these dark thoughts by Mikey's shell cell ringing. Mikey pulled the phone from his belt, glanced at the display screen, then quickly put it up to his ear. "Hey April," he greeted softly before pausing to listen to whatever was being said. A small frown appeared on his face and he let out a low grunt. "Oh really?" he replied before listening some more. "Yeah, yeah, that'd probably be best"…"Sure April"…"Just keep us informed." He shut the phone with a small snap.

"What's going on?" Raph asked, his voice tight with pain as he continued to endure Donnie's ministrations.

"April's taking Casey to the hospital," Mikey replied succinctly. "She's afraid he might have broken something beneath all his pretty bruises. She sounded pretty freaked out."

Donnie suppressed a sigh at the news. April had been through so much lately, and he knew she was driving herself crazy with worry about them. Tonight's incident certainly wouldn't go far in alleviating her fear. He felt badly for her, and a bit guilty too. Casey wouldn't have gotten hurt if he wasn't out running patrol with them.

Raph's concern ran in a slightly different direction.

"Poor Casey," he muttered, clenching his jaw and forcibly holding his right wrist with his left hand so as to keep it perfectly still while Donnie worked. "He's told me about human ER's before, and they don't sound like much fun. Don't know why April didn't just bring him down here and let Donnie patch him up."

"Oh yeah, because as opposed to Casey, you're having _so_ much fun," Donnie replied sarcastically, tossing the bloody rag he had been using to clean Raph's wounds into the nearby trash can and discretely reaching for the needle and thread. "April took him to the hospital because there are _real_ doctors there with _real _supplies that can really take care of him. If anything, _you_ should be jealous of _him, _Raph."

Raph let out an incredulous snort. "No way," he huffed. "I'd take you over a _real_ hospital any day of the week, Donnie."

Donnie felt a flush of warmth go through him at his brother's words. There was a stark honesty to Raph's tone that let him know his brother wasn't just trying to patronize him…he really meant what he said. He appreciated Raph's unwavering confidence, but as he began the tedious and yet all too familiar process of stitching, he couldn't help but question his brother's sanity. At least in a real hospital Raph would have been given something for the pain by now. All Donnie had to work with were some lousy over-the-counter pills and his brother's high tolerance for pain. Every time Raph flinched he felt himself cringing in sympathy.

"So, are we going to talk about that wolf creature, or what?" Mikey stated after a few moments of silence, rocking his legs back and forth beneath the table. "Where do you think he came from? How did he get mutated? Do you think there's any more like him out there?"

"I don't know, I don't know, and I certainly hope not," Donnie replied succinctly, finishing the first gash and moving on to the second. He gave a slight shudder as he remembered the speed and strength of the mutant wolf. They had all been caught completely off guard by its presence and very nearly paid the price for it. He had no wish to repeat tonight's confrontation.

"But you must have at least some idea, Donnie?" Mikey persisted. "You always do."

Donnie held back an irritated sigh. "Sorry, Mikey, but I haven't really given it much thought. I've been a little preoccupied trying to make sure Raph doesn't bleed to death." He jabbed the needle with a little more force than necessary through his brother's flesh, and Raph let out a small grunt. Donnie immediately gentled his hands, casting his brother an apologetic look.

"Well, whatever it was and wherever it came from, it sure was strong," Raph muttered, very purposefully not watching as Donnie stitched up his wound. "And pretty darn fast, too."

"Yeah," Mikey agreed. "It was like King Kong, only the wolf version."

Donnie rolled his eyes at his brother's overactive imagination, but then something inside his mind suddenly kicked into place. The mental image of a giant ape made him remember an earlier conversation he'd had with Mikey, one that his brother now had no memory off. He paused his work mid stitch, his eyes staring blanking ahead of him as a sudden possibility dawned on him.

"Uh, Donnie?" Raph called, glancing worriedly down at his arm. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Donnie blinked up at him, then slowly shook his head. "Nothing," he replied shortly. "Nothing's wrong, I was just thinking…" He returned to his stitching, but his movements were on automatic now as his thoughts raced. It seemed so very obvious, and yet there was no point in jumping to conclusions until he checked the evidence.

Raph and Mikey continued to discuss the evenings' events, but Donnie only half listened, too caught up in his own thoughts. As soon as he had tied off the last stitch and bandaged his brother's arm, he hurried over to the sink and washed the blood from his hands, then began frantically glancing around the lab. "Where did I put it…" he muttered to himself, vaguely aware of Mikey and Raph watching him curiously from across the room.

"Ah ha!" His eyes landed on the desk pushed up against the far wall, and he hurried over to it, yanking open the bottom drawer.

The site of the dusty and worn backpack lying forgotten at the bottom of the drawer hit him like a punch to the gut, momentarily freezing his limbs and stealing his breath. A flood of memories washed over him, ones that he'd just as soon forget. Memories of _that_ night…the worst night of his life. He could feel his hands trembling, and it was only through sheer willpower that he was able to reach down and grab the dirty canvas, pulling the bag free from the drawer. He knew it was just his imagination, but he thought he caught a whiff of something old and decaying, like a recently opened tomb. It was the smell of death, and he couldn't help but shudder.

Tightening his grip on the bag and trying to steady his breathing, he turned back to his brothers. He watched as Raph's gaze flickered down to the backpack, his eyes widening and his back stiffening. A flash of pain crossed his features before his expression turned quickly neutral, all emotion hidden behind a carefully blank façade.

Mikey had no such reaction. His gaze remained calmly curious as he watched Donnie approach with the backpack, and for the first time Donnie found himself envying his brother's loss of memory.

"What's up, Donnie?" Raph asked softly, his voice low and tight as he fought to keep his emotions in check.

Donnie carefully set the backpack on the table, pretending not to notice when Raph actually flinched slightly back away from it. "I'm thinking that we might just find answers to some of Mikey's questions in this bag," he replied evenly.

"Huh?" Mikey grunted, casting a confused look back and forth between Raph, Donnie, and the bag. It was obvious that he was picking up on their tension, but he remained blissfully unaware of its cause. Donnie was about to change that.

"Mikey," he stated, turning to face his brother straight on. "This backpack is from the night of the explosion." His words were blunt and to the point, and he watched as dawning comprehension caused his brother's face to turn a paler shade of green. They had told Mikey the basics about their mission that night, just enough to explain the cause of the explosion that had torn their life apart. They hadn't gone into a lot of details, and Mikey hadn't asked for more, content with just the basics. Again, that was all about to change.

"I took some notes from a file we found in Stockman's lab," Donnie continued, surprised at how calm and even his voice sounded. He certainly didn't _feel_ very calm. "I never looked at those notes. In fact, I kinda forgot all about them. But when you were just talking about how strong that mutated wolf was, it reminded me of a conversation we had down in the tunnels. I was worried about the cages we found in Stockman's lab, and we got to talking about how strong and big whatever he was keeping inside had to be to be able to break through the bars…"

"So you're thinking that wolf creature might have been what Stockman was keeping in the cages?" Raph asked slowly, picking up on the direction of Donnie's thoughts.

Donnie shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. The time frame fits, and we know that Stockman was obsessed with mutagen and figuring out how we became mutated. It wouldn't surprise me at all if he was messing around with this kind of thing. It's worth looking into, anyway, and at the moment it's the only lead I've got."

"You said there were five cages in Stockman's lab, right?" Mikey asked, a grim look crossing his features. "If you're right about this, you know what that probably means, right?"

Donnie sighed, reaching up to rub at his forehead where he could feel a headache slowly growing. "Yeah, Mikey. The thought had crossed my mind."

"Great. Just checking." Mikey eyed the backpack with trepidation. "So I guess that means research time. Just how many of these notes are we talking about, Donnie?"

Donnie grabbed the bag, pulled back the zipper, and reached inside, grabbing a thick handful of files. He withdrew them, allowing them to fall to the desk with a dusty thwap. "A lot," he answered grimly.

Mike and Raph exchanged a quick look, then with twin sighs of resignation they each reached out to grab a file.

* * *

He felt free.

He hadn't realized before how trapped and confined he felt at the warehouse, but running the rooftops with Viz, with nothing but the air and the stars around him, he felt almost like a bird released from a cage. As he leapt across alleyways and over balustrades, he felt a sense of comfortable familiarity that instantly put him at ease, despite the ever present risk of discovery. He couldn't remember ever feeling this light and carefree, and he wanted the night to last forever.

Viz didn't seem to share his joyous reaction, at least not to the extent that Blade did, but he kept pace easily and allowed his companion to have his fun. It wasn't until the eastern sky was showing the faintest tinge of pink that Viz suggested they head back.

Trying to push aside his disappointment, Blade swept his gaze one more time over the sprawling lights of the city, a strange sense of nostalgia sweeping over him. Had he been on these rooftops before? Had the city lights and the bright stars at one point in time been a familiar sight to him? It felt somehow as if they were calling to him, urging him on toward…what? He did not know. But he couldn't deny the sense of longing that rose up within him, overwhelming in its intensity. It was a strange sensation, to feel such a fierce longing without even truly knowing what it was that he was longing for.

With a small sigh, he turned and began following Viz back the way they had come. He tried to hold on to the happy feelings generated from the spontaneous evening of freedom, but the nearer they came to the warehouse, the harder that became. He couldn't help but feel somewhat like a prisoner returning to his cell. He told himself he was being ridiculous, but the feeling remained nonetheless.

As per Alpha's orders, two human sentries stood guard at the warehouse door. They made no move to stop Viz and Blade from entering, but Blade couldn't help but notice how both men tensed when they neared, the expression on their faces turning wary and suspicious. He couldn't be certain, but he thought one of the guards was fingering a gun hidden in the pocket of his jacket.

Once in the warehouse, they came across another small group of human's lounging in the main room, smoking and drinking and talking amongst themselves. This wasn't at all unusual on a night after a major raid, but there was something subdued about the group that didn't feel at all normal. All talk came to an abrupt halt as they entered, and any lingering doubt that Blade had that something was up disappeared at the looks on the men's faces. It was the same wary suspicion he had spotted on the guards outside

He glanced over at Viz, finding his friend wearing a small frown, his ears pressed back against the side of his head. It was obvious that Viz was picking up on the strange tension from their human companions as well. Not all of the Wolf Gang members were allowed at the warehouse, but those who were had long since grown accustomed to the mutants living there. Blade could think of no explanation for their strange behavior now, and could only assume that something had happened while they had been gone.

"Why don't you head to our room," Viz stated suddenly, casting Blade a quick sidelong look. "I will go and find Alpha. Do not leave the room until I return."

Blade frowned at the command but quickly nodded his agreement, glancing back at the group of humans. They were still watching them, their expressions guarded and suspicious, and Blade unconsciously found his hand straying toward the hilt of his sword.

Viz broke off from him at the far end of the room, heading toward Alpha's office. Blade walked in the opposite direction toward their room, grateful he didn't have far to go. There was something in the air of the warehouse that had him on edge, a sense of menace and danger that he had never felt before.

Once inside the room, Blade spent the next several minutes pacing the floor, constantly glancing toward the door and fingering the hilt of his sword. He tried to think about what might have happened in their absence to cause the tension he had sensed, but there were simply too many possibilities. He would just have to wait until Viz returned and hope that his friend had some answers.

The minutes stretched on, time crawling forward with agonizing slowness. After a half hour of pacing, Blade forced himself to settle on his bed. He removed his sword from its hilt and used an old cloth to begin the process of cleaning and polishing the blade. It didn't really need it, but it was a good excuse to keep the weapon handy, and having something to do helped the passage of time seem not quite so agonizing.

Even so, it seemed like an eternity later when the door finally swung open and Viz stepped into the room. The gray wolf glanced toward the bed, his expression more serious than Blade had ever seen it. He quickly set aside his weapon and rose, his heart pounding a wild tempo inside his chest. He opened his mouth to ask his friend what he had learned, but Viz spoke before he even got the chance.

"Tarin is dead," the wolf announced without preamble, his voice even and level but something dark and dangerous glinting in his black eyes.

Blade stared at his friend in shock, feeling his blood run cold at the unexpected announcement. Of all the possibilities he had been half expecting, this hadn't been one of them. "How?" he finally managed to gasp, struggling to come to grips with the grim news. Tarin hadn't exactly been what he would call a close friend, but the news that he was dead was still more than a little upsetting. He had been one of the pack…one of the family.

Viz let out a heavy sigh, moving further into the room and sinking down onto his haunches near his own pallet, his dark eyes appraising Blade with quiet intensity. "The raiding party was attacked shortly after we left," he replied grimly. "All of the humans managed to escape with minor injuries, but Tarin was killed."

Still reeling with the news, Blade sank back down onto his bed, staring back at Viz with a helpless expression. "Was it the cops?" he asked numbly, feeling his stomach twist uncomfortably at the very prospect. If the cops had been the one to kill Tarin, it meant their existence was now known to the authorities, something that could only mean trouble. Alpha had made it clear over and over again that secrecy was the key to their survival here.

Viz was shaking his head. "It wasn't the cops," he answered simply, his eyes moving away from Blade for the first time, flickering across the room to stare at some spot on the wall behind him. Blade waited for a moment, expecting Viz to continue, but his friend remained silent, staring at the same spot across the room.

"Viz?" Blade finally prompted, the question in his voice evident.

Viz finally looked back at him, a strange look in his eyes, as though he was struggling to come to some sort of decision. Then his expression firmed, and he gave a small nod, almost as if to himself. "I was not planning to tell you this," he stated quietly, staring at Blade with the same sharp intensity as before, "but I suppose you will find out sooner or later, and you have a right to know."

"Know what?" Blade asked, unable to hide his confusion.

Viz let out another long sigh, but his gaze was steady as he looked over at Blade. "There is something about the night we found you that I have not yet shared with you," he replied simply. "It is something that might…upset you. Until tonight I didn't think it was important, but I was wrong."

Blade felt the air catch in his lungs as he stared over at his friend, feeling a wave of both eagerness and apprehension suddenly sweep over him. Inside his mind he could almost feel the black fog roll and undulate in anticipation of what was coming next. He had no idea why Viz was bringing this up now, or what it had to do with Tarin, but he was suddenly desperate to hear what the other had to say. "What is it?" he whispered, his entire body leaning forward slightly on his mat.

"You are not the only mutant turtle out there," Viz stated directly, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at Blade evenly. "There are at least three others exactly like you, only they wear different colors. On the night we rescued you, we saw all four of you fighting together against some ninjas on a rooftop near the lab where Stockman held us. We were curious about you, and so Alpha sent Two Toes and I to follow you down into the sewers to see if we could learn more about you."

Blade wasn't sure how many more surprises he could take in one evening. Viz's words left him reeling once more, and he was suddenly glad he was already sitting down. His body was numb with shock as he struggled to come to terms with what he had just been told.

There were more mutants just like him? Other turtles? They had fought together? Why? Who were they? He struggled to find the answers, hoping the unexpected news would shake forth some sort of memory from the fog inside his mind, but there was nothing.

Well, perhaps not nothing.

When Viz had mentioned the other turtles he had felt a flash of intense emotion, there and gone again before he could fully comprehend it. The sensation had been so strong that he was having trouble identifying exactly what it was that he had felt. Even now he couldn't make sense of it, try as he might. Perhaps it was simply a reaction to learning that there was others out there who might know him…who might be able to tell him who he was.

"Why?" he choked out, unable to keep the hurt from his voice as he stared over at Viz. "Why didn't you tell me this, Viz? Why would you keep this a secret?! Maybe they're my friends. Maybe they've been looking for me. Maybe they could tell me who I am! You had no right to keep this from me!"

Viz seemed unfazed by Blade's outburst. He merely stared at him for a long moment before finally answering. "I do not believe they are your friends," he stated quietly, then lifted one paw-hand to forestall the question already rising to Blade's lips. "It is true you fought beside them, but later in the sewers, after the explosion that caused the tunnel to collapse…they left you." He paused, obviously struggling to find the right words to explain what had happened. "Two Toes and I watched from a distance. We had been ordered by Alpha to remain unseen. You were trapped and injured, completely helpless, and they merely walked away. They left you to die, Blade, alone and afraid. Now I ask you, what kind of friends would do such a thing?"

Blade dropped his gaze to his lap and didn't answer, for the moment unable to reply. The hope and excitement that had bloomed in his chest at the news there were others like him fizzled slightly in the face of Viz's words.

'_They left you to die…' _

He had no memory of that night. All he knew was what Viz had told him…that he had been trapped beneath some debris while the tunnel had flooded around him. If Viz and Two Toes hadn't arrived when they had to pull him free, he wouldn't have survived. As it was, he had come very close to dying. The idea that someone had been there with him, but then left him, was almost too horrible to comprehend.

"Maybe they were going for help," he whispered softly, trying desperately to come up with some kind of explanation.

Viz grunted. "When they left, the tunnel was already filling with water. They had to have known you would not have survived long enough for them to return."

Blade let out a deep sigh, struggling to make sense of the myriad of emotions flooding through him. It was strange…a few minutes ago he hadn't even known these other turtles existed, so how was it that he could feel such a deep sense of betrayal. He knew he didn't have the whole story, but any way you looked at it there was no escaping the fact that they had left him alone to die. He trusted Viz enough to know his friend wouldn't lie to him about that. Viz was right; what kind of friends would do that?

"Why do you tell me this now?" he whispered, barely able to get the words out through the tightness in his chest.

Viz let out a deep sigh . "Quite honestly I believed we had seen the last of them. I saw no point in hurting you with the information. But now I realize I was wrong."

"Why's that?" he asked, his voice coming out hoarse and strained.

Viz shook his head slowly, a dark frown settling over his features. "It was these three other turtles, along with a human companion, who attacked the gang and killed Tarin," he replied quietly.

Blade let out a small grunt, too overwhelmed with all he had learned to even feel the shock of this latest piece of information. His brain seemed unable to fully comprehend the full import of all that Viz was telling him. He knew he would need to find a quiet place to sit and mull it all over before he could even hope to make sense of all the emotions coursing through him at the moment. Until then, he wasn't entirely sure what he was supposed to do with the information he had been given.

Viz seemed to understand some of what he was feeling. "I know it is a lot to take in," he murmured, reaching out across the space that separated them and placing one hand on Blade's shoulder. "Just give it time."

"What did Alpha have to say?" Blade asked numbly.

Viz let out a harsh snort, dropping his arm back into his lap and sitting back. "He wasn't too happy about you and I taking off. I got a tongue lashing that will have my hair lying flat for a week." He shook his head ruefully, his massive shoulders rising in a slight shrug. "Honestly though, it wasn't _him_ that I was most concerned about. Two Toes and Talon were as upset as I've ever seen them. They were both ready to come down here and tear you to pieces where you stood."

Blade felt a flash of alarm at Viz's words, and he sat up straighter on the bed. "But I didn't _do_ anything," he protested, frowning at the complete injustice of it all.

"I know," Viz replied, "but they're not exactly thinking straight at the moment. In their mind, you're still one of _them_. I had to physically stand in the doorway to keep Two Toes from coming after you the moment he realized we were back. Luckily, Alpha sided with me and was able to talk him down. They aren't happy about it, but they will follow his lead."

"Great," Blade muttered sarcastically, letting out a long sigh. He had worked so hard to prove himself to the pack, to earn a place among them, and now, due to something he'd had nothing to do with, he was looked upon as the enemy. It was completely unfair. He was beginning to wonder if he would _ever_ find acceptance here.

Viz gave him a sympathetic smile. "Don't worry," he murmured. "They'll eventually calm down and see reason. And until then, I got your back."

Blade returned his friend's smile with a small one of his own, the most he could muster. It was hard to believe that only a few hours ago he had felt so happy and free, completely opposite of the doubt and confusion that plagued him now. He really just needed some time alone to sit and think and try to figure everything out.

Unfortunately that was not to be.

Viz rose from his crouch, offering Blade one of his hands. When Blade merely looked at him in confusion, he stated simply, "We have to go. Alpha wants to see you."

Blade felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, but he knew he had no choice but to obey. Reaching out and grabbing Viz's hand, he allowed his friend to haul him to his feet. As they headed toward the door, Viz reached out and threw one furry arm across the back of Blade's shoulders, leaning in close to whisper, "remember, I got your back."

* * *

The room Alpha had taken as his office was dark and cold, which seemed to suit its occupant just fine. Blade had only been inside it a handful of times, and in each instance he had felt like a defendant being brought before a judge. Alpha's massive frame completely filled the back half of the room, his sheer size more intimidating that Blade would have cared to admit. Even Viz, who was easily as big as the tawny wolf, seemed somehow smaller once inside the pack leader's chosen domain.

"I take it Viz has filled you in on the evening's events," Alpha asked coolly, appraising Blade with his dark and calculating gaze.

Blade nodded, casting a quick glance over to where Viz was lounging against the wall. His friend gave him an encouraging nod, and Blade turned his attention back to Alpha. "I'm sorry about what happened to Tarin," he responded honestly, hooking his fingers in his belt and forcing his body to remain still under the pack leader's scrutiny.

"And Viz told you who was responsible for his death?" Alpha asked, cocking his head to one side in a questioning manner.

Blade swallowed hard and nodded. "Yes," he answered simply, feeling again a wave of undecipherable emotions threatening to overwhelm him. He wished he had been given some time to think before being forced to face Alpha.

"Did this news trigger any of your memories?"

This time Blade shook his head, dropping his gaze, ashamed once more that he wasn't able to offer Alpha the answers he sought.

Alpha let out a disappointed sigh. "No matter," he stated smoothly. "We will just have to find our answers some other way. In the end, it doesn't really matter who these turtles are or where they came from. By their actions they have declared themselves our enemies, and we shall deal with them appropriately."

Blade could feel Alpha's gaze boring into him, watching him closely for any sort of reaction. He kept his body perfectly still and his expression neutral, not betraying any of the inner turmoil currently churning deep within him.

"This of course means you are faced with a choice," Alpha stated evenly. "We know at one time you fought beside these turtles. Perhaps it is your wish to return to them to try and learn of your past?"

Blade didn't answer, keeping his head bowed and his face hidden from the pack leader's prying eyes.

"If that is the case," Alpha continued after a few moments of uncomfortable silence, "then you have my permission to go. Perhaps they will have the answers you seek. But know this…once you leave, you will not be welcomed back. If these other turtles deny you, then you will be an outcast, homeless and alone, without the protection and safety of others."

Alpha paused, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air between them. Blade could feel the sweet collecting on the back of his neck despite the coolness of the office. His heart was pounding wildly inside his chest, and he was finding it difficult to keep his breathing calm and even.

"Your other choice," Alpha went on, his piercing gaze never lifting from Blade for a single moment, "is to remain with us. If you do so, you will be expected to prove your allegiance. I will accept nothing but your utmost obedience and loyalty. Any hint of anything else will be dealt with immediately and harshly. You will have a place here among us, but you will have to earn it. I trust you understand your choices?"

Blade lifted his gaze and quickly nodded, his thoughts racing. He could feel the weight of both Alpha and Viz's eyes on him, and he was finding it difficult not to squirm in discomfort. He knew Alpha was expecting his answer right away, just as he knew there was really only one answer he could give.

It was a test, plain and simple.

Alpha might be pretending to offer him a choice, but in reality Blade knew there was little chance the pack leader would simply allow him to walk away and join up with the very ones he had just declared enemies. And even if he would, was that the path Blade could even seriously consider. The other turtles had abandoned him to die, whereas Viz, a complete stranger, had rescued him. Was it not to Viz and the others that he truly owed his loyalty? Walking away now would be a poor way to repay the debt he owed them. Even if the turtles could answer all his questions, were the answers worth the price? Was he willing to risk everything he had for the possibility of learning who he had once been? Wasn't it simply better to accept that his old life was gone and move forward with the new life given him?

Never before had he felt so torn and confused.

"So?" Alpha pressed, settling back on his haunches, apparently completely at ease. "What will it be? It is time to choose."

Swallowing down his doubt, Blade clenched his jaw and lifted his head, letting his eyes meet Alpha's boldly. Then, with no hint of indecision or hesitancy he answered firmly. "I choose you."

TBC

_Hope you enjoyed. I look forward to hearing your thoughts... _


	9. Chapter 9

It was nice to have answers.

Donnie only wished the news they had discovered wasn't quite so grim.

He let out a deep sigh, dropping the thick file he had been reading onto the table in front of him and reaching up to massage his temples. He had a headache in the works, and it promised to be a doozy.

He had been through Stockman's files at least half a dozen times over the last few days, trying to ferret out every detail and small nugget of information he could. Even with familiarity, the information never stopped disturbing him. The term "mad scientist" didn't even begin to describe the depravity and cruelness depicted by Stockman in his research. He had crossed every boundary and broken every rule in his scientific exploration; kidnap, human experimentation, mind control, torture… It made Donnie sick to even think about it. Stockman wasn't a scientist, he was a psychopath…a brilliant and incredibly talented psychopath, but a psychopath none the less.

"At least he kept good notes," Donnie muttered disgustedly.

As disturbing as the information was, at least they now knew exactly what they were dealing with. Not that the knowledge brought much comfort.

Stockman had chosen his victims well…two homeless ex-soldiers, a recently released convict, and twin brothers newly arrived to the country. They were individuals without any close family or friends…people that nobody would give much thought to when they up and disappeared. More than that, they each had some sort of background in training and fighting, which fit in perfect with Stockman's plan to turn them into Shredder's personal soldiers.

Donnie wasn't sure which was more frightening; the fact that Stockman had almost succeeded in his plan, or the fact that he had failed. In either case, it was the turtles that were left to clean up the mess. Mutant wolves roaming the city, building a gang army, and creating general havoc wasn't something they could just ignore.

There was always the chance that the mutant they had run into was acting on his own, but Donnie highly doubted it. Wolves possessed a strong pack mentality, a trait that would have been passed along in the mutation process. Where one was found, the others were likely nearby, and now that one of their own had been killed, they would be all the more wary and cautious.

Which led to the question of what they were supposed to do once they _did_ find the other wolves? It wasn't like they could just turn them over to the police like they did with the usual riff-raff they ran into on the streets. The last thing they wanted was to alert the humans to the presence of mutants living among them. So what exactly where they supposed to do with them? They had already killed one, but they hadn't really had a choice. Donnie was hoping a more peaceable solution could be found with the other four.

He had tried to discuss all this with Raph, but his older brother didn't seem as concerned about the whole thing as he was, shrugging it off with a dismissive "we'll just have to see what happens." The whole situation made Donnie more than a bit nervous. He hated the thought of going after the other four mutant wolves without having some sort of plan in place.

At least he had some time to think about it. Master Splinter had forbidden them from going after the Wolf Gang again until Raph and Donnie had fully healed. It was somewhat unusual for their Sensei to be so overprotective, but Donnie thought he understood where his father's accelerated sense of caution was stemming from. Even months later, Leo's death continued to affect all of them in not only obvious, but often subtle ways.

"We've landed in quite the pot of hot water this time, Leo," Donnie muttered aloud into the silent lab. He wished his oldest brother was here now. They had always been able to figure out even the toughest situations when they had put their heads together. A small wistful smile turned up one corner of his mouth as he thought of all the insane plans the two of them had managed to hatch up over the years. He missed those "geek sessions" as Raph called them more than he'd ever thought possible.

'_God I miss you, Leo'_ he thought sadly, rubbing at the quick sting in his eyes. It was always the hardest to deal with his grief when he was alone and tired, and seeing as it was the early hours of the morning and the rest of his family had all long since retired to bed, he was especially vulnerable. He had lost count of the number of times he had wept himself dry in the silence of his lab late at night.

But not tonight.

With an effort of will, Donnie forced his mind away from thoughts of Leo and rose. Stretching sore muscles he moved slowly toward the door of the lab. He would grab a cup of coffee, put in another hour of work, and then retire to bed. One way or another, he was determined to have some sort of plan in place when they next went out.

He wasn't going to let anything take them by surprise.

* * *

He couldn't stop thinking about them.

Blade lay back against the tattered blankets on his bed, staring sightlessly at the stained ceiling above, trying desperately to turn off his mind and empty his thoughts. Confined to his room until further notice, he'd done nothing but think for the last twenty-four hours, and it had gotten him absolutely nowhere. There were simply too many questions with no answers, and his thoughts had begun to take on a circular pattern that did nothing but frustrate and annoy him.

He had asked Viz to tell him more about the night he had been rescued, and his friend had complied. Unfortunately, there just wasn't that much more to learn from the story. Viz had no idea what had caused the explosion that had trapped him, having arrived too late to witness that part. He_ had_ seen two of the other turtles check on Blade before apparently deciding he could not be saved and leaving. The sense of betrayal Blade felt at that news was just as strong the second time hearing it as it had been the first.

He wished he just knew why.

But he would never get the opportunity to ask. Alpha had made it clear that Blade was to have no interaction with any of the other turtles, nor was he to make any attempt to seek them out. He had made his decision, and there was no turning back now.

With nothing but his troubled thoughts to keep him company, Blade had eventually sought refuge in sleep. Yet even with the drug Viz gave him, he'd had trouble finding rest. When sleep had eventually come, it had brought with it vivid and disturbing dreams…dreams of _them._ As soon as he had woken the dreams had slipped from his mind like wisps of cloud, impossible to hold on to and yet somehow leaving him with a heavy sense of loss and despair.

As time dragged on, Blade felt something dark awakening inside him. His confusion and doubt began to morph into something else entirely; anger. It wasn't fair that he was being treated like a prisoner. It wasn't fair that all his work at being accepted into the pack had been ruined in one fell swoop. These turtles had caused nothing but trouble, and he wished he had never heard of them. As if casting his life aside like so much cheap rubbish hadn't been enough, they'd had to show up and kill Tarin, further complicating things. Why couldn't they have just stayed away? He had just begun to accept and adapt to his new life. Why did they have to go and ruin everything?

The anger inside continued to grow, and Blade did nothing to stop it, finding that it was much easier to deal with than his feelings of betrayal and loss. He didn't _want _to long for these mysterious strangers. He didn't _want_ to dream about them and wake up feeling as though he had lost something irreplaceable. He wanted to forget all about them and just move on with his life. It would make everything so much easier.

'_But what if you're wrong?'_ A small voice whispered in the back of his mind. It was a voice he didn't want to listen to…a voice that he did his best to banish.

It wasn't until late the next evening that Blade was finally allowed to leave the confines of his room to wander the rest of the warehouse. He relished the freedom, seeking whatever ways he could to distract himself from his thoughts. He sparred with Viz, played cards with a couple of their human companions, and visited the rooftop in order to take in some much needed fresh air. It wasn't much, but after being cooped up in the room for so long, it felt wonderful to be able to move about freely once more.

He saw no sign of either Two Toes or Talon, which he guessed was no accident. Viz and  
Alpha were likely purposefully keeping them separated until things had a chance to cool down. He had dared to hope that his declaration of loyalty to Alpha might have earned him some clemency from the two, but apparently he was wrong. Viz kept telling him that they would eventually come around, but Blade wasn't holding his breath.

As grateful as he was for his newfound freedom, he quickly learned that it extended only so far. Alpha had forbidden him from leaving the warehouse until further notice, which meant each evening he was left behind as the others went out. It was extremely frustrating, and he couldn't help but wonder how long this imprisonment would last.

He spent the evenings pacing the warehouse roof, his thoughts a confusing jumble of worry, anger, and fear. He wouldn't breathe easy until Viz returned and reported an eventless night.

After over a week of this same routine, the general consensus among most of the gang members seemed to be that the encounter with the turtles had been a one-time occurrence, and some of the tension seemed to leave the air.

Despite this, Blade remained confined to the warehouse, and with each passing day his anger grew. He used it to help strengthen his resolve when doubts threatened to creep past his defenses. It became his shield, and he wrapped himself firmly within its greedy hold, hardening his mind and heart.

He knew the time would come when Alpha would eventually relent, and when that happened he was determined to prove himself to the gang once and for all. He didn't know what it would take, but whatever it was, he would do it.

* * *

Mikey had never noticed before how loud silence could be.

Usually he avoided anything to do with calm and quiet. It just wasn't really compatible with his nature. But lately he found himself seeking out the silent solitude found in his oldest brother's empty room.

He shifted his position on the bed, his shell scraping softly against the wall at his back, his gaze idly scanning the pristine room around him. Everything was exactly as it had been left months before, making it easy for Mikey to pretend that his brother wasn't gone at all, merely absent for a while. It was a comforting illusion that shattered as soon as he stepped from the room, but he relished in it while he could.

None of them had had the heart to move anything from in here yet. It was still too soon…the pain still too raw. It would happen eventually though, and Mikey knew once it did the comfort he found in this place would be gone for good. It would no longer be "Leo's room" but rather an empty and painful reminder of what they had lost.

He feared that day. This was where he came when he needed to feel close to his brother, like a piece of Leo's spirit still lingered on here. He came here when he needed to think, or when he couldn't sleep at night. He came here whenever he felt lonely or afraid. He came here when the grief and guilt grew so heavy he felt as though he would collapse beneath the weight of it.

He had learned that with the grieving process, there were good days and there were bad days.

Today wasn't a good day. Today he missed his big brother. Badly.

He found his eyes straying to the brightly colored rug that stood out glaringly in the middle of the gray cement floor. He had given Leo that rug as a gift several years ago. It wasn't exactly in his older brother's usual simple style, but Leo had smiled at Mikey and thanked him, bringing the rug straight up to his room and placing it in the middle of the floor, on display for all to see. He hadn't even acted embarrassed when Raph commented that it looked like a fairy had thrown up all over his floor. He'd seemed to genuinely like it, not because of what it looked like, but because of where it had come from.

Mikey hadn't understood all that at the time, but he did now.

"I'm sorry, Leo," he whispered softly into the silence, his hand absentmindedly stroking the soft blue blanket beneath him. "It should have been me, not you."

It felt strange, putting to voice the guilt that had been plaguing him ever since he had first learned of his brother's death. Time should have helped, but instead it seemed it was getting harder and harder to ignore that small voice in the back of his mind that kept telling him that it should have been _him_ that died in that explosion, not Leo,

Leo was smart, brave, strong, talented, compassionate, and one hell of a leader. Who was Mikey in comparison to that? He was the annoying jokester who couldn't concentrate and who always seemed to manage to mess things up. If the world made sense, if there was any semblance of justice to life, then _Leo _would be the one alive right now, not him.

Absentmindedly Mikey reached up and rubbed at the spot on his plastron directly above his heart, as though by massaging it he could somehow get rid of the ever present ache that had settled there.

He hadn't told his brothers about how he felt. Raph would just get angry, and Donnie would probably give him some lecture about "survivor's guilt." Mikey was well aware of where these feelings were coming from, but that knowledge didn't keep him from thinking them every single day. It didn't stop him from believing it was true.

There were times when he wondered if his brother's didn't think it as well, if only a little. They would never say it out loud of course, but there were moments when Mikey imagined he could see it in their eyes. Like this morning, when he hadn't been able to concentrate in morning practice and Raph had given him a disappointed glare as they left the dojo. Or this afternoon when Donnie had come to him to brainstorm an idea he'd had, only to discover that Mikey had nothing to offer him. In each instance he felt like he was failing them in some deep way that only drove home Leo's absence all the more.

With a small sigh, Mikey pushed his dark thoughts away. They did him no good and only served to depress him further. There was nothing he could do to change what had happened…he only had to figure out how to live with it. Shoving down the aching pain in his chest, he pushed himself up from the bed and made his way over to the door. He would have loved to remain here for a while longer, but it was almost dinner time and he had promised to make Chinese for everyone.

He made his way silently downstairs, marveling at how quiet and deserted the lair seemed. There was no sign of his brothers, and the door leading into Master Splinter's room was closed. Splinter had always been a very private rat, but lately he had been spending more and more time in solitude. His presence had been an unmeasurable comfort during those first few hard months, when the darkness of their grief and despair had threatened to drown them all. Now it seemed he was finally taking some much needed time to deal with his own feelings of pain and loss.

Mikey briefly debated turning on the TV just for some background noise, but decided against it. The last thing he needed was to get distracted and ruin dinner, something he was notorious for. He had screwed up enough for one day.

A few minutes later the kitchen was filled with the tantalizing aroma of stir-fried chicken and teriyaki sauce. Mikey was so engrossed in his cooking that he failed to notice the arrival of his brothers until he turned around to grab the box of rice and found both of them sitting at the table watching him.

"Smells good, Mikey," Donnie grunted, rubbing at the side of his head in a way that indicated he had another headache. He'd been getting them a lot lately. Too much research and not enough sleep. Mikey wasn't sure why his brother did that to himself. It wasn't like he was going to be able to pull anything more from those files than he had the first dozen times he'd read through them. Leo had always been good about pulling Donnie from his research when he became too obsessed, but while Mikey had tried, he had met with little success.

Walking over to the cabinet he pulled out a bottle of Excedrin, then returned to the table with the pills and a glass of water, setting them in front of his brother. Donnie cast him a gratefully look, which Mikey managed to return with a small smile. His brother must have seen something in his eyes, because his expression turned concerned. Mikey quickly turned away and moved back to the stove before Donnie could ask him the inevitable question of whether he was alright. No, he was not alright, but just because he was in a funk today didn't mean he had to drag his brothers down with him.

"I've got some good news," Raph spoke into the sudden silence. "Master Splinter's cleared us for patrol tonight."

Mikey nearly dropped the box of rice into the pot of hot water, managing to snatch it away at the last possible second. He cast his brother a sideways glance, unsure what to make of the sudden bundle of nerves that formed in the pit of his stomach. He had known this night was coming, but something about today had him feeling squirmy and off. He'd wanted to spend the evening curled up on Leo's bed reading one of his favorite comic books until he fell asleep. He was ready to put the day behind him, not search the city all night for four mutated monsters that probably wanted nothing more than to rip their heads off.

Donnie let out a small grunt at the news. "I thought he wanted us to wait until Casey was healed up enough to join us?"

Raph gave a casual shrug. "I managed to talk him out of that. Casey's going to be hung up for a couple more weeks at least, and there's no way we can wait that long. Every night this Wolf Gang is growing stronger. It's high time we find the snake's head and chop it off."

"Don't you mean the _wolf's_ head?" Donnie commented dryly, popping the lid from the bottle of painkillers and pouring a couple into his palm. "You do realize we'll be outnumbered, right? If we run into all four of those mutants, they'll tear us to shreds."

"We'll just have to be careful," Raph replied easily, his tone dismissive. "We've faced difficult odds before and come out fine."

"Oh, so naturally we have nothing to worry about," Donnie replied sarcastically, his voice taking on a sharp edge. "No need to do anything crazy like…oh say, actually come up with a plan. That would just be silly."

Mikey winced. When Donnie got angry he tended to become sarcastic and a bit condescending, something which never failed to set Raph off like fire to dry kindling. It didn't help that ever since he'd had his stitches removed a couple of days prior, Raph had been acting restless and impatient, eager to get back out there. Donnie's resistance to that wouldn't go over very well.

Sure enough, Raph was glaring at Donnie from across the table, his hand curling into a fist. "So I suppose you would prefer we sit down here on our asses reading through those damn files for the next hundred years and hope the problem resolves itself, eh Donnie?"

"Of course not," Donnie snapped. "But it wouldn't hurt to be a little better prepared…"

"Reading those notes over and over again isn't going to prepare us for jack squat!" Raph interrupted, the heat in his voice obvious. "We're as prepared as we're going to get, and it's time we end this!"

Mikey bit his lip, watching as his two brothers squared off across the kitchen table, both glaring daggers at one another. They'd been snipping at each other all day, and he'd known it was only a matter of time before it ignited into a full out argument. He had always considered it his job to sense the coming storm and find a way to divert it, either through distraction or humor, but he just wasn't feeling it today. No easy quip or quick joke rose into his mind, instead he merely stood and watched, hoping he wouldn't get pulled into the argument and be forced to pick a side.

"And what are we going to do if we _do _find them?" Donnie asked, his voice tight with frustration. "You want to just wing it Raph?"

"We do what we have to do," Raph replied simply, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms across his chest, looking completely unconcerned.

"So in other words, you want us to just kill them all like you did the first, is that it?" Donnie snapped. "They're not just wild animals Raph, they're part human as well…or don't you care about that?"

Raph tensed, his entire body going rigid, and Mikey prepared for the inevitable explosion. An angry Raph often equaled a violent Raph. He prepared to step between his brothers if things got physical, but with what looked like an extreme effort of will Raph managed to reign in his temper.

"Of course it matters to me," he replied tightly, staring at Donnie across the table, his expression hard. "I killed him because he was threatening your life, Donnie. If we let these creatures continue to run free, how many more lives are going to be threatened? They've proven by their actions that they don't care about hurting people, and that means they need to be stopped. Who's going to do it if not us? They've made their choice and I've made mine. It might not be pretty, but it's the way things are."

Donnie met Raph's stare for several silent moments, and Mikey found himself holding his breath as he waited to see what would happen. He was relieved when Donnie finally dropped his gaze, his shoulders bowing as he let out a deep sigh. "I know," he stated simply, the words quiet with defeat.

Raph grunted, some of the tension leaving his shoulders. "Look Donnie, I need you with me on this," he stated quietly, the heat leaving his tone in the face of Donnie's concession. "I can't do it on my own. I know I'm not that great at all the strategy and planning crap. I'm not…" his voice broke and he cleared his throat before continuing "…I'm not Leo. I never will be. But I'm doing the best I can, and I promise I got your back. I won't lead us blindly into something too dangerous to handle, and I won't let anything happen to either you or Mikey. You have my word on that."

Raph's words hung in the kitchen air, heavy with promise, and Mikey felt some of the apprehension curled in his gut loosen. He watched as Donnie looked up from the table, meeting Raph's gaze with a steady one of his own. "I know," he repeated for a second time, "and I'm with you." The barest hint of a smile twitched at one corner of his lips. "I guess planning and strategy can only take you so far. Honestly, how often do plans work the way they are supposed to anyway?"

Raph let out a short snort. "With us? I'd say…never."

Just like that the tension in the air dissolved and Mikey found himself releasing the breath he had been holding in a giant whoosh. The sound was quite loud in the small kitchen, earning him a look from both his brothers.

"Mikey, the chicken's burning," Donnie stated evenly.

Mikey let out a yelp, his senses belatedly alerting him to the smell of overcooked food. He whirled around and snatched the pan from the stove, quickly placing it to one side so he could examine the extent of the damage. Luckily it appeared salvageable, and he immediately set his mind back to the task at hand, half-heartedly listening in to the quiet conversation going on behind him.

Today hadn't been a good day, but perhaps that would change. Afterall, there was no telling what the evening would bring.

* * *

Over a week after the death of Tarin, Blade found himself brooding on the warehouse roof, prepared to spend yet another night alone while the rest of the gang went out. Normally he'd be spending this time sparring with Viz or some of the other gang members, but today he wasn't in the mood for company.

He'd had another dream about the turtles, and the result was a funk he just couldn't seem to shake. He'd gotten pretty good at blocking thoughts of them from his waking mind, but much to his annoyance the same couldn't be said for his subconscious. The dreams were maddening in their regularity, and they only served to darken his already foul mood.

Why couldn't he just forget about them like everyone else seemed to have?!

He remained on the rooftop for several hours, ignoring the approaching darkness and the ominous clouds it brought with it. It seemed a somehow fitting match for the darkness of his thoughts. It wasn't until the wind picked up and the first splatters of rain landed in wet plops against the rooftop that he finally headed back inside.

He slipped down through the trap-door in the roof, blinking his eyes at the sudden darkness. The lanterns that served as the warehouse lighting at night had not yet been lit, and with the storm dimming most of the light coming in through the windows, the entire place was cast in deep shadows. He was familiar enough with the warehouse layout that he didn't need much light to find his path, and he started confidently down the hall toward his room.

His senses alerted him to danger a mere second too late. The attack, when it came, was so fast he barely had time to register it in his mind before he was being slammed back against the warehouse wall with enough force to rattle his teeth. The air was knocked from his lungs, and he had to fight to keep his feet. He sensed movement in the shadows in front of him, and without thought he responded, using the wall to balance himself as he kicked out sharply with one leg.

He heard a harsh grunt as his foot made contact, but before he could do much more than take a single step forward, two massive arms wrapped securely around his chest, hauling him back against something solid and furry.

"Hold him!" a voice growled roughly from the darkness.

A flare of panic ran through Blade as he recognized the voice. He squirmed and twisted, desperately attempting to wrestle himself free, but his attacker merely tightened his grip, pinning his arms firmly to his chest and holding him locked in a tight embrace.

Blade opened his mouth to let out a call for help, but before he had a chance an unseen fist slammed into the side of his head, sending bright lights dancing across his vision. Before he could recover, he felt a large paw-hand close around his throat, closing off his airway.

"Squirmy little rat, aint you," Two Toes' voice hissed into his ear, and Blade felt his already wildly pounding heart pick up tempo.

He tried desperately to think of something to do to free himself, but his mind was already growing hazy from the lack of oxygen, his thoughts scattered and desperate. The hand around his throat was iron tight, with no give, and he was unable to draw in a single breath to feed his starving lungs. Lights sparkled across his vision and a roaring sound filled his ears.

"I told you Talon, he aint that tough." Two Toes' sneering voice drifted to him from a thousand miles away, mocking and condescending.

Blade knew he was about to die. He struggled and thrashed as much as he could within the iron grip that held him, but it was no use. He tried to kick Two Toes, but his strength was already weakening, and his blows held no power. Held in Talon's strong hold with Two Toes choking the life from him, he truly believed that he had reached the end. He felt his consciousness fading, and in that moment the fog in his mind rolled back for just a second…

_He was struggling to hold his head as high as possible, fighting to ignore the pain it ignited in his chest. Water lapped against the side of his head, its touch gentle and yet also terrifying. He was sucking in great gulps of air, reveling in the feel of oxygen sliding down his throat and into his lungs, knowing these breaths would be his last. He had never before been so terrified…so alone._

_The water flowed over his face, covering his mouth and nose in one fluid wave, and he thought for sure his heart would burst with the force of the panic rushing through him. He didn't want to die…not yet…not like this._

'_Help me!'_

The fist around his throat loosened, and Blade responded automatically, hauling in a huge lungful of air. It burned in his throat, slicing down his airways like tiny knives, but he sucked it in greedily nonetheless, panting in his desperation to feed his starving lungs. His head was swimming, his near brush with death, both present and past, leaving him feeling dazed and confused.

It took him a few moments before he realized he was still being held firmly, Two Toes' dim face swimming across his vision, the black wolf melding nearly perfectly with the dark shadows all around. Two Toes was regarding him coldly, his lips pulled back in a slight snarl.

"Consider this a warning, boy," he snarled, the hand that had been wrapped around Blade's throat closing around his right forearm instead, sharp claws digging into soft flesh. "You may have the others fooled, but not us. We're watching you, and the first hint…the first tiniest sign that you are going to betray us, and we _will_ kill you! You may be Viz's little pet now, but not even he will be able to protect you from us, do you hear me?"

Blade couldn't have answered even if he wanted to, his lungs still too busy greedily sucking in what air they could. He felt Two Toes' claws tighten around his arm followed by the warm flow of blood. Then the black wolf released him and took a step back, his dark glowing eyes the only part of him that Blade could make out in the darkness.

"Let him go," Two Toes ordered, and Blade felt the arms locked around his chest finally release their hold on him.

Without the support, he dropped to his knees, still too dizzy and weak to maintain any sort of balance. A part of him wanted to fight back, but he forced himself to remain still, focusing on drawing in one painful breath after another. As much as it galled him, in his current state he knew he wouldn't stand a chance against the two larger and stronger mutants.

"Remember, boy…we're watching you." Just as quickly as they had come, Two Toes and Talen disappeared into the darkness, leaving Blade kneeling alone in the silent hallway.

Once they were certain they were truly gone, Blade used the wall behind him to help drag himself back to his feet, his entire boy aching from the violent attack. His head was throbbing, his throat burned fiercely, and the cuts high on his arm were sending steady slivers of blood running down his arm. His body was trembling and he felt as week as a newborn kitten. Despite all that, he knew he had gotten off lucky. Two Toes and Talon could have very easily killed him.

He made his way slowly back to his room, his thoughts full of everything that had just happened. Viz was waiting for him when he entered, the gray wolf stretched out of his pallet with a small book held in one massive paw. He glanced up as Blade entered, pushing himself upright on the small bed. His eyes widened when he caught sight of Blade's bruised and battered form.

"What happened?" he demanded, jumping up from the bed and hurrying forward. His gaze swept over Blade's body, taking in the bruising around his throat and the claw marks high on his arm. He swore, his expression morphing into dark anger. "Alpha _told_ him to leave you alone," he growled harshly. "When I get my hands on him…"

He began to move toward the door, but Blade stepped neatly into his path, holding up a single hand to forestall his friend. "Don't." He ground out, the single word burning up through his damaged throat.

Viz paused, glaring at him. "Get out of my way," he demanded, giving Blade a warning look. "Two Toes needs to learn his place, and I plan to teach it to him."

Blade shook his head, refusing to move from his spot blocking the doorway. "Won't help," he muttered, reaching up to massage his sore neck. "Just make things worse. I'm fine. Let it go."

Viz grunted, crossing his arms across his chest and giving Blade a very thorough once over. "You don't look _fine_ to me," he retorted. "What did he do? Ambush you when your back was turned?"

Blade shrugged. "Something like that," he muttered. "Please, Viz, just let it go. He gave me his warning and it's over…unless you go and stir things up again." He held his breath, hoping his friend would listen. He would never find acceptance within the pack if his very presence continued to stir up trouble at every turn. And, if he was being completely honest, a portion of him was still smarting from being called Viz's pet. He didn't need the gray wolf to fight his battles for him. He would figure this out on his own.

Viz regarded him silently for several long moments before finally relaxing, his arms dropping down to his sides. "Fine," he conceded. "I'll let it go for now if that is what you want."

Blade let out a small sigh of relief. "Thank you," he replied, moving away from the door and sinking down on the edge of his bed. He turned his head to examine the gashes on his upper arm, noting that they had already stopped bleeding. They still stung, but he didn't think he would need any stitches. His throat ached and burned with every breath, but he knew that would fade as the swelling went down.

He felt his friend's gaze on him and looked up to find Viz staring at him from across the room.

"What?" he asked, fighting to keep the bitterness from his tone.

Viz slowly shook his head, letting out a deep sigh. "Nothing," he muttered, turning toward the medical chest at the far end of the room.

"I don't want any drugs," Blade growled, unconsciously covering the inside of his elbow with one hand. "I'm not ready to sleep yet."

Viz only grunted, but when he straightened from the trunk he wasn't holding the customary syringe, but rather a roll of white gauze. "Better wrap that up," he muttered, walking over to the bed and kneeling down in front of Blade, reaching for his injured arm.

Blade almost resisted, but with an effort he swallowed his pride and allowed his friend to help him. It wasn't like this was the first time Viz had tended to his injuries. Just because his pride was still smarting from his encounter with Two Toes and Talon didn't mean he should push away his one and only friend in this place.

Neither of them spoke as Viz worked to bandage the arm. When he had finished, the gray wolf sat back on his haunches to inspect his handiwork. "That should hold," he stated evenly. "How are you feeling?"

Blade gave a halfhearted shrug. "I'm fine," he answered tightly, not meeting the others gaze. Truthfully he was feeling more humiliated than hurt. He had allowed Two Toes and Talon to get the drop on him, and the two had taken him down with embarrassing ease. He wished he had found a way to fight back harder. It might have earned him a few extra bruises, but at least he wouldn't be feeling like a complete weakling.

"Do you feel up to joining me on a raid tonight?"

Blade was jerked from his bitter thoughts by Viz's question. His gaze shot up to meet his friend's, barely daring to hope that he had heard correctly.

"Alpha said you could accompany me." Viz confirmed lightly, the smallest of smiles twitching at the corners of his lips. "Things have been quiet and we're in need of a larger supply run. He's got a special target for us, and your skills will be needed. It will just be us and a couple of humans. That is, if you think you're feeling up to it?"

"I am," Blade stated hurriedly, an overwhelming sense of relief washing through him. It seemed that his imprisonment was finally coming to an end and he would once again be given the chance to prove himself. No way was he going to allow a sore throat and a couple of scrapes stop him.

"Thought you might say that," Viz drawled, dropping back to crouch down at the edge of his own bed. "We'll leave in a couple of hours. Think you can stay out of trouble until then?"

For the first time in days Blade felt a wide grin split his face. "Hell yeah," he answered, the pain and humiliation of the last hour all but forgotten.

Tonight he would finally be free. Tonight he would have a chance to prove his worth to the Wolf Gang once and for all. Tonight, he would forget about the turtles once and for all and finally begin to move forward with his new life.

TBC

_So sorry everyone for the long wait. It has been a crazy busy month. This chapter did not go through the heavy review process of previous chapters, but I couldn't make you wait any longer. I hope you enjoyed anyway._

_Anyway, if anyone is still out there reading this, please drop me a review and let me know your thoughts. I will do my best to have the next chapter up in a week! It is one I am super excited about!_

_Thank you for everything. Without you all this story would not exist!_


	10. Chapter 10

_Thank you, thank you, thank you to all who reviewed! There were a lot of new names. I was starting to think this story was losing interest, but your kind reviews really encouraged me. I tried my hardest to get this up within the week for you all, but, well, that didn't happen. So, I made it extra-long to make up for it. Enjoy!_

* * *

There was something in the air tonight.

A sense of anticipation swept through Blade, causing his body to tense and his heart to accelerate. It was more than just the joy of finally being free from the warehouse, or the excitement of knowing he was about to do something dangerous. This feeling was different. He couldn't quite place it, but it was something akin to expectation. It was almost as though he could sense that something was about to happen…something big…and he couldn't make up his mind whether he should be nervous or excited.

The warehouse Viz had taken him to was farther than any of the others they had previously hit, past 16th street and into a district that was both fancier and busier. Even this late at night a few lights could be seen shining from neighboring windows and an occasional car still drove past on the nearby street. As for the warehouse itself, the fence was a little taller, the locks a little thicker, and the security system a lot more high tech. All these things combined meant they would have to be twice as careful in order to avoid detection.

Blade wasn't quite sure why Alpha had chosen this particular warehouse when there were several far easier targets closer to their hideout, but he wasn't in a place to question the pack leader. He was just grateful he was being allowed to join the raid in the first place. The warehouses' security presented a challenge, and Blade took pride in the knowledge that no else within the gang had the talent and skill to successfully bypass it. He was being given a chance to prove his usefulness to the pack, and he was determined not to disappoint.

"Are you ready?" Viz asked softly from beside him.

Blade ran his gaze one final time over the warehouse before turning to his friend, a self-confident grin turning up the corners of his mouth. "Yep," he replied easily. "Give me ten minutes…fifteen tops."

Viz nodded, but reached out one hand to stop Blade as he started to rise and move away. "Hold on a moment," he murmured.

Blade obediently dropped back down, eyeing his friend questioningly. "What is it?" he asked, watching as Viz shifted uncomfortably beneath his gaze.

"There's one more thing Alpha wishes for you to do," Viz stated simply, not quite meeting Blade's eyes as he reached behind the nearby air-conditioning unit and pulled out a simple black bag.

"Okay." Blade eyed the bag curiously before glancing up at his friend's strangely solemn face. "What is it, Viz?"

Instead of answering, Viz merely drew the bag closer and reached for the zipper. Undoing the side, he reached into the bag and pulled out a small object wrapped in black cloth. Blade watched in curiosity as his friend carefully unwrapped the object, his movements slow and precise. As the last of the cloth fell away, Blade jerked back, unable to hold back his gasp of surprise, immediately recognizing what the gray wolf was holding in his hands.

It was a bomb.

Small and simply made, it was nonetheless impossible to mistake. It was even fitted with a small red timer that boldly displayed twenty minutes.

Blade's gaze snapped up to meet that of his friend's, his breath quickening and his eyes widening in shock. "What the hell, Viz?" he gasped, his eyes returning to the small device with growing alarm.

"Don't worry, it won't go off," Viz assured him lightly. "You have to arm it first. To do that, you simply connect this red wire to the junction point here at the top. As you can see, once it's set, you'll have twenty minutes to clear the area. It may be small, but I'm told it packs quite the punch, so it will probably be best if we are well gone by then."

Blade shook his head in disbelief, watching in consternation as his friend casually re-wrapped the bomb and replaced it in the bag.

"I thought we were here to rob the place, not blow it up." His voice was strained and he made no effort to hide it. Any eagerness he had once felt for this raid had just slipped away like smoke up a chimney.

Viz glanced over at him, a wry smile twisting the corners of his mouth. "Actually we're going to do both," he answered evenly. "After you get us in, the boys and I will load up the van while you set the bomb."

"Why?" Blade asked numbly, staring down at the backpack and the now hidden bomb it held. This made no sense. As far as he knew, the gang had never done anything like this before. Why here? Why now?...Why him? "Is this some kind of test?"

Viz shook his head, his dark eyes gleaming in the moonlight as he stared down at Blade. "This has nothing to do with you," he assured softly before turning his gaze to the warehouse sitting silent across the moonlit street. "This one's personal for Alpha."

Blade waited for more, but Viz remained silent, his gaze locked on the warehouse. There was something distant and sad about his posture, and Blade felt his stomach churn in apprehension.

"You're going to have to do better than that, Viz," he stated softly, sinking down into a low crouch and watching his friend closely. "You're asking me to blow up a building here."

Viz's gaze flicked sideway to him, and the gray wolf let out a low sigh. "You wouldn't understand," he murmured softly.

Blade shook his head, crossing his arms and leveling his friend with a determined stare. "Try me," he challenged softly.

Viz stared at him for a few moments before giving in with a small shrug. When he spoke his voice held a note of bitterness that Blade had never heard before. "We were soldiers once, Alpha and I," he began simply. "We served together overseas for three years. You want to know the funny thing about soldiers, kid? When they're gone fighting to protect the country, everybody loves them. They get letters from kindergartners and boxes of chocolates from complete strangers. But then, when they come back home, suddenly they're just not important anymore…just another bum on the street."

Blade stared at his friend in surprise, not quite sure what to say in response. In the several months he had known the gray wolf, Viz had never really talked much about his past. Blade had known he and Alpha had been friends for a long time, just as he had known they were homeless when Stockman had kidnapped them, but that was the extent of it. He had never asked for more information, not wanting to pry, and Viz had never spoken of it before now.

"Alpha and I were in the same company together." Viz continued, his eyes going distant as he got caught up in old memories. "He was my commanding officer. That's where he got the name Alpha…it was his call sign. I got my name then as well. My full name is Victor Zinfrano, but everyone just started calling me Viz for short. We were a pretty tight group." He let out a long sigh, pausing for long enough that Blade began to wonder if he was going to continue.

"The life of a soldier isn't easy, but I still liked it," he finally stated quietly. "It wasn't until I came back home that I had any problems. My parents had died when I was in high school, and I didn't have any other close family to come home to. I was kinda lost and confused, and I didn't adjust all that well. I couldn't seem to hold a job, which I guess is how I ended up on the streets. That's where Alpha found me. I thought I had it pretty bad, but what he went through was so much worse."

Again Viz paused, collecting his thoughts, and Blade waited patiently for him to continue, unable to deny the curiosity filling him. Somehow the knowledge that Viz and Alpha had once been soldiers was at once both fitting and surprising. The way that Alpha ran the wolf gang spoke clearly of his experience leading men, and yet at the same time he didn't strike Blade as the patriotic type. Viz…perhaps, but Alpha?

Viz continued with his tale, his voice still carrying that underlying tone of bitterness. "Alpha wasn't like me. He had a wife and a successful business to return to. He was actually looking forward to coming home." Alpha let out a soft grunt, his gaze flickering briefly to meet Blades, his expression sad. "Unfortunately, when he got back he found out his wife had run off with another man, but not until after she had maxed out all the credit cards, leaving him with massive debt. At the same time, his business partner of fifteen years stabbed him in the back, hiring a big-time lawyer and finding a way to write him out of the partnership. Alpha was devastated. He tried to fight back in the courts, but…" Viz trailed off, shaking his head. "Long story short, he ended up losing everything…his home, his job, even his damn dog. That shouldn't happen to any man…least of all someone who has already sacrificed so much."

Blade had nothing to say to that. Perhaps it was because he had only known Alpha _after_ he had been mutated, but he found it difficult to imagine anyone daring to push him around like that. Alpha was strong and powerful. It was hard to believe that perhaps there was a time when he was not...a time when he was simply lost and defeated.

"Anyway," Viz continued, his gaze still locked somewhere distant. "That warehouse is owned by Alpha's old business partner. Like I said…this one is personal."

Blade let out a long sigh, reaching up to massage his temples. He wasn't sure exactly how he felt about all this. What had happened to Alpha was horrible and wrong, but he didn't see how blowing up the warehouse would fix any of it.

In all the time he had been with the Wolf Gang, Alpha had always justified their actions as necessary for survival. But now Blade was beginning to wonder if this whole crusade hadn't been about something more than that. If it hadn't also been about revenge, about reclaiming the power and control Alpha felt had been robbed from him. It certainly made sense, and explained a thing or two about the pack leader.

But in the end, what did it matter? Whether the motive was survival or revenge, the outcome was the same. Blade was in this now, and there was no turning back. He had sworn his allegiance to Alpha. To refuse to act now would be seen as betrayal, and Blade would lose any chance he had at gaining the pack's trust. If he was lucky, all they would do was cast him out.

His fingers trailed along the bruised skin of his throat, his eyes glancing down at the bandage wrapped around his arm. He somehow doubted he would get that lucky

Besides, had promised himself he would do whatever it took…

"We clear the building before I set the bomb," he stated firmly, pushing down the lingering doubt and apprehension swirling in his gut. "No one gets hurt."

Viz gave a short nod. "Agreed," he replied lightly.

* * *

Two armed security guards patrolled the exterior of the warehouse, aided by several rotating cameras mounted on the outside of the building and one fixed camera over the main entrance.

The first order of business for Blade was taking out the security system, no easy task as the control panel was located_ inside_ the warehouse, and all the windows and doors were barred, locked, and alarmed. The slightest tampering would set off the entire system, bringing down the guards and automatically notifying the police.

Both guards carried access cards, but getting to them undetected would be difficult if not impossible with all of the cameras. Even if he did manage to procure one, there was no way to make use of it. There was undoubtedly a third guard inside who would be monitoring all of the security feeds, and if he saw anything at all suspicious—such as a giant green turtle trying to use the access card to open the front door—he was sure to sound the alarm.

Which meant Blade would have to use an alternate way to get inside. Luckily his earlier examination of the building had revealed just what he needed. It wouldn't be easy, but Blade felt confident in his ability to pull it off.

As soon as he began to move in on his target, he felt a calm focus envelope him, driving away any lingering doubt and fear. It was just like when he sparred with Viz; his body simply took over, moving of its own accord with practiced ease, every movement smooth and silent. A small part of him always wondered where he had learned such skills, but he didn't allow himself to dwell on it too much. He just knew he could do what needed to be done, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

He made his approach on the south side of the warehouse, making use of a burned out lamp that provided him with extra shadows for coverage. He timed his approach carefully, constantly monitoring the movements of the guards and the scan of the security cameras. He used what cover he could find, both man-made and natural, the dark night becoming his ally, cloaking him in shadows and masking his movements. At one point in time one of the guards walked within five feet of where he hid, never noting his presence.

It took him less than five minutes to traverse the open lot and reach the edge of the warehouse, ducking safely beneath the watchful eyes of the mounted cameras. Using a nearby drainage gutter he quickly scurried up the side of the building to the roof, relishing the feel of the cool evening breeze playing over his skin and sending his bandana tales waving lazily in the wind behind him. There were no cameras or prying eyes up here, and Blade allowed himself to relax slightly as he made his way to the northwest corner of the building.

The easy part was over…now it was about to get difficult.

Reaching the edge of the roof, he carefully leaned over and peered downward, his gaze immediately locating the smooth metal grill of a ventilation grate several feet below him. The grate was about five foot long by four foot high and secured to the side of the warehouse by several thick screws. In order to reach it, he would have to hang one handed from the edge of the roof while simultaneously using his free hand to work the screws free.

Piece of cake, right?

Pausing only long enough to pull a small blade from his belt, he smoothly slipped over the side of the roof, lowering himself down carefully a few feet to the right of the vent. He kept his breathing even and smooth as he released the edge of the roof with one hand, hanging by only three fingers as he quickly but carefully used the tip of the knife to began working the first screw loose.

It took a few minutes, but eventually it slipped free. Blade carefully caught it before it could fall to the pavement below, then began work on the second screw, focusing on keeping his movements smooth and steady. It seemed to take forever, but finally the second screw also worked free. Two down, one to go…

The muscles of his arm were beginning to ache, the deep scratches left by Two Toes throbbing fiercely from the strain, but he pushed the pain to the back of his mind, all his attention set on the task before him. He didn't bother looking down. He didn't need to. It didn't take a genius to know that a fall from this height would seriously ruin his day.

By the time the third screw worked free, Blade's arm was trembling noticeable, small spasms that ran from his wrist to his shoulder. He was relieved when the grate swung to one side and he was finally able to swing his body inward through the opening. He paused on the lip of the hole, taking a moment to catch his breath and scout out his surroundings. The vent was an open air vent, meaning there was no ductwork to maneuver through. Instead, a narrow catwalk ran directly below, suspended from the ceiling by several thick iron cables. Dropping silently down onto the walkway, he allowed himself a small sigh of relief. He was in and no alarm had been sounded. So far, so good.

Shaking out the muscles in his arm, he glanced beneath him, mentally mapping out the layout of the warehouse below. From his current location he could see the security booth almost directly beneath him, the door hanging open and the sound of music drifting out from inside. He could just make out the security guard's leg, the man's foot bouncing and swaying in time to the music. A careful glance around showed him that the interior of the warehouse lacked the cameras that guarded the outside. Good. It made his job that much easier.

The catwalk had no ladder, and the warehouse floor was too far down to risk simply jumping. Luckily a support joist several yards from the walkway provided him just what he needed. Taking a few steps running start, he vaulted neatly over the catwalk railing, caught the raised metal sides of the joist, and slid smoothly and silently down to the floor below.

Feet firmly back on solid ground, he reached behind him and drew his sword, relishing in the low hum from the steel as it pulled free from its sheath. He made his way swiftly toward the security booth, his movements perfectly silent, not a single sound giving away his presence. Not that it was necessary; the guard's music would have covered any sounds he might have made regardless.

The guard never knew what hit him. One moment he was bobbing his head in time to the music, his gaze fixed on the bank of video screens in front of him, and the next he was unconscious on the floor. After that, it took Blade less than a minute to successfully disable the security system, turn off all the cameras, and unlock the doors. He allowed himself a small smile of triumph before turning to grab the unconscious guard, hauling him up and over one shoulder with a small grunt of effort. Then he headed for the warehouse's main entry.

He was slightly surprised to find Viz waiting for him as soon as he opened the door, the gray wolf lounging casually against the side of the building, picking at his teeth with one sharp claw.

"The guards?" Blade asked quietly, arching a questioning eyebrow at the gray wolf.

"Taken care of," Viz replied easily, a wolfish grin settling over his features. "I couldn't let you have _all _the fun, now could I?"

Blade let out a small snort, shaking his head. "If it will make you happy, next time I'll be sure to let you hang from the thirty foot high roof and sneak in through the ventilation grate."

Viz straightened from his slouch, letting out a short grunt. "No thanks," he replied flippantly, reaching out and relieving Blade of the unconscious guard. He paused, his gaze coming to rest on Blade's upper arm. "Any problems?" he asked softly.

Blade glanced down at his arm, noting dispassionately that the white bandage was now marred by a few patches of red. Apparently hanging from the roof hadn't done the wound any good. "I'm fine," he replied lightly, giving his friend a reassuring smile.

Viz nodded slowly, shifting the unconscious guard into a better position on his shoulder. "I'll go put this one with the others over by the gate."

Blade nodded, glancing over his friends shoulder and watching as a black van pulled into the warehouse lot, marking the arrival of the rest of the gang. When he looked back at Viz, the wolf was holding out the black bag, all hint of humor gone from his expression. "Twenty minutes," he stated quietly, leveling Blade with a solemn gaze.

Blade swallowed hard, reaching out slowly to take the bag. "Twenty minutes," he repeated softly.

Viz gave him a small encouraging smile, then turned away to meet the rest of the gang. Blade watched him for a moment before letting his gaze fall to the bag he held. He knew it was his imagination, but it felt much heavier than it should have.

Shaking his head at his own foolishness, he turned back and re-entered the warehouse. It was time to get this over with.

* * *

"I'm telling you Raph, it was the same van from last week," Mikey whispered roughly, reaching out and grabbing his big brother's shoulders and bodily forcing him to turn and face him. "I know what I saw."

Raph grunted, shrugging out from beneath Mikey's hand and crossing his arms over his chest, his expression darkening with annoyance. "Mikey, there are hundreds of vans in New York," he stated pointedly. "There's no way you could know it was the same one. We're not even in the right territory yet."

Mikey ground his teeth in frustration, wondering not for the first time why his brothers never wanted to _listen_ to him. "It was the same van," he repeated stubbornly. "I _know_ it was."

Raph sighed, glancing over at Donnie who merely shrugged and asked. "How do you know Mikey?"

Mikey shook his head, glaring at his brothers in annoyance. "I don't know," he replied tightly. "I just know it was." As soon as he had seen the van he had recognized it from the warehouse raid they had interrupted over a week ago. It wasn't anything specific he could place his finger on, but more of a gut feeling. Of course, gut feelings didn't go far in convincing Donnie the Practical and Raphael the Skeptical. Leo would have believed him, but then again, Leo had never underestimated the importance of instinct and intuition.

Donnie and Raph exchanged another long look, and Mikey had to resist the strong urge to clonk them both over the head with the end of his nun chucks. Every second they stood here arguing, the van was getting a little farther away.

Finally Raph let out a long sigh. "Fine, Mikey…I'll humor you. Which way was the van going?"

Mikey quickly pointed toward the street the van's lights had disappeared down moments earlier. "That way," he replied succinctly.

Raph shook his head. "I'm telling you, if it is the same van, they're heading in the wrong direction. That's Dragon Territory."

"All the more reason we should check it out," Mikey retorted shortly, hopping from one foot to the other in impatience to get going. If they waited any longer, they would have trouble finding the van again, even from their rooftop vantage.

"Oh, let's just go Raph," Donnie finally muttered. "What will it hurt?"

Raph looked like he wanted to argue further, but with a muttered curse he finally gave in. "Fine! But if this turns into a wild goose chase, Mikey, I'm going to pound your shell!"

Ignoring his brother's empty threat, Mikey took off in the direction he had last seen the van, hurdling from rooftop to rooftop, only half paying attention to his footing as his eyes scanned the streets below for any sign of the vehicle. At first he thought he had lost them, but then he caught sight of the familiar tail-lights several streets ahead. The van was just making another turn, and Mikey poured on the speed, determined to catch up to them. He could hear his brothers struggling to keep up behind him, but he didn't slow his pace. After all, it was their fault they were so far behind in the first place.

They ran on for several minutes, slowly gaining ground on the van in front of them. Any doubt Mikey may have been harboring that he had made a mistake disappeared as the van at last turned down a quiet side street and headed for the parking lot of a large warehouse at the end of the street. It was well after midnight, and there was absolutely no good reason for the van to be there. Mikey could think of a couple _bad_ reasons though.

"Hold up, Mike," Raph called softly from behind, and Mikey obediently slid to a halt still several rooftops away. His brothers came up beside him, and together they silently watched as the van pulled directly up to the warehouse doors and several men piled out and quickly disappeared inside. Less than a minute later they reappeared, arms full of boxes that they loaded swiftly in the back of the van before disappearing back inside the warehouse.

Mikey turned and gave his brothers a pointed look, waiting expectantly for their acknowledgment that he had been right. Donnie gave him a small smile and a conceding shrug, but Raph only grunted.

"Okay Mikey, you take point. Donnie and I will bring up flank. Keep a sharp eye out. We don't know if another one of those wolf creatures is around, and I don't want to be taken by surprise like last time."

Mikey shook his head, rolling his eyes. He supposed Raph giving him point was about all the apology he could expect to receive from his red-banded brother. He would take it though. Despite his earlier reluctance, he found himself suddenly ready and eager for some action.

Leaving the rooftops, they made their way quickly forward, Raph and Donnie dropping back to flank Mikey on either side. Mikey drew his weapons from his belt, carrying them loosely at his sides. He made no special effort to hide their approach, but even so the gang was so focused on their task that they didn't immediately take note of their presence. Mikey decided that a heads-up was only polite.

"Hey guys," he called out cheerfully, setting his nun chucks in a slow spin by his side. "You look like you're in a hurry?"

Two of the men had just finished depositing their load into the back of the van, and at Mikey's call they whirled around so quickly they nearly knocked each other over. One of the men let out a hoarse shout, his hand dipping toward the gun he had tucked into the side of his belt. Mikey frowned, but otherwise made no move as the fool pulled the gun free and began to lift it.

He didn't get far. The gun was only halfway up when a silver shuriken suddenly embedded itself into the back of the man's hand, causing him to howl and drop the gun, which bounced once before sliding away somewhere beneath the van.

"Now, now, play fair," Donnie's mild voice sounded from behind Mikey. "You don't see _us _carrying any guns do you?"

"You're going to pay, freak," the second man growled, his hands bunching into fists at his sides. His companion was too busy cradling his wounded hand and whimpering to offer his own threats.

"Yeah, yeah, we're terrified I'm sure," Raph growled. "Now why don't you call your buddies out here and we can get this show on the road."

As if in direct answer to his brother's words, Mikey watched as the remaining gang members suddenly appeared in the warehouse doorway, some of them gripping wicked looking knives while others held planks of wood they had obviously picked up from somewhere inside. There were no more guns readily apparent, but Mikey knew that didn't necessarily mean one or two of the punks weren't secretly packing.

"This all of you?" Raph asked, sounding bored. "You sure you didn't bring along one of your pet dogs to play?"

The group of men exchanged glances, but instead of answering, they merely charged forward with a wordless shout, weapons brandished.

* * *

The bomb was set.

Blade sat back on his haunches and watched as the small clock on the front of the device began to slowly tick backwards: 20:00, 19.59, 19:58, 19:57…It was somewhat mesmerizing to watch, like the slow slide of an avalanche down a mountainside, powerful and impossible to stop. He felt something twist inside his gut, and he had to forcefully push the sensation away. What was done was done…it was too late now to feel guilty about it. He couldn't stop the bomb now even if he wanted to…he didn't know how. His choice was made and there was no turning back. Now he just needed to find Viz, finish loading the van, and then get as far away from here as possible.

He rose to his feet, giving the bomb one last glance before turning his back and making his way toward the front of the warehouse. He had only gone a short distance when Viz suddenly appeared in the passageway before him, his expression grim.

"They're here," the gray wolf stated without preamble, rushing forward and gripping Blade by his shoulder. "Is there a way you can get back up to the roof?"

Blade stared at Viz in confusion, at first not comprehending what his friend was talking about. Then realization hit, and he felt his entire body stiffen, his eyes widening in alarm. In the distance he heard a cry of pain, the sound echoing back through the warehouse and jarring him like a slap to the face. He stared down the passageway toward the front of the warehouse, his breath caught in his lungs, his heart pounding wildly within his chest.

They were here.

Right now.

It seemed somehow impossible.

"Blade!" Viz's sharp voice cut through his shock as his friend tightened his grip on his shoulder, giving him a slight shake to gain his attention. "Can you get back up to the roof?" he repeated, his voice low and urgent.

Feeling dazed, Blade slowly nodded. "Yes, but…" he began, only to be cut off.

"Get up to the roof and stay out of sight," Viz ordered briskly, his dark eyes boring into Blade, his mouth set in a grim line. "That's an order. The boys and I will take care of this. You are to stay clear, Blade, do you understand?"

Blade wanted to argue, but a single look into his friend's face told him that Viz wasn't going to budge. A strange mix of emotions washed over him, a combination of disappointment and relief. The thought of facing the ones who had abandoned him to death was overwhelming, and yet he would have been lying if he didn't admit to the strange longing that had him leaning unconsciously toward the front of the warehouse.

"Do you understand?" Viz repeated again, this time louder, his grip tightening on Blade's shoulder until it was actually painful.

Blade swallowed hard and nodded. "Yes," he whispered, his stomach twisting into tight knots.

"Good," Viz growled, already turning and heading back toward the entrance. Blade watched him go for a moment before snapping his body into action.

He raced for the nearest wall joist, scaling it in the blink of an eye and making the leap to the catwalk without a second thought. He tore down the walkway, his footfalls sounding loud in the otherwise silent warehouse as he abandoned all attempts at stealth and silence. Scrambling up and out of the vent was a lot easier than getting in had been, and within seconds he was standing atop the roof once more, breathing hard, his body shaking with a mixture of adrenaline and apprehension.

He stood still for moment, fighting to control his breathing and regain at least some semblance of calm, but it was no use. He was feeling a hundred different emotions at the moment, and he couldn't for the life of him figure out which one to focus on. He found his feet carrying him forward without making the conscious decision to move, his eyes glued to the section of roof that overlooked the front entry. The muted sound of fighting drifted to him on the night air, and he couldn't hold back the shiver that raced down his spine.

He reached the ledge and looked over. A metal lamp post jutted out from the wall fifteen feet below him, casting the scene beneath it in an eerie orange glow.

The fight…or perhaps it would have been better to call it a massacre…had just ended. The gang members were lying strewn around in varying states of unconsciousness, looking for all the world like little toy soldiers thrown down and abandoned. Despite himself, Blade couldn't bring himself to focus on them at all. Instead, all his attention was drawn to the three figures forming a loose triangle at the center of the scene.

At that moment, a bolt of lightning could have struck the roof directly behind him and he still wouldn't have been able to tear his eyes away from the figures beneath him. Red, orange, and purple…his mind registered the colors in a single glance, and he found himself holding his breath, leaning out over the edge of the roof so he could study each of them better.

Red was the biggest, his frame thick and muscular, his color slightly darker than the other two. He was casually spinning two sais between his fingers as he surveyed the fallen men around him, something fierce and protective in his gaze.

Orange was shifting restlessly from foot to foot, as though uncomfortable standing still, his nun chucks forming complicated patterns all around his body. His movements carried a natural grace and athleticism, and though his expression was serious, his features showed the lines and ridges of someone who liked to smile a lot.

Purple was the only one standing completely still, his Bo staff held at an angle in front of him, his purple bandana tales flapping gently in the wind. He was regarding the scene around him with an intelligent and calculating look, as though analyzing it for future evaluation.

The way they were standing…each one guarding the backs of the others… spoke of fellowship and comradery, a single fighting force made up of three separate parts.

Three, not four.

A sharp pang of loneliness and loss shot through Blade, taking him completely by surprise. As if in direct response, the anger and bitterness that had been his constant companion for the past week rose up to swallow it. He was suddenly overwhelmed by the strong urge to go down to them. He didn't know what he would say or how they would react to seeing him, but he wanted a chance to look them in the eye. He wanted to ask them why he hadn't been good enough to be included in their little group. He wanted to ask them why his life meant nothing to them.

He took a small step forward, but before he could go any further he saw the three turtles suddenly tense, moving to form a single line facing the warehouse door.

Viz had arrived.

* * *

Donnie wasn't sure why the gray wolf wasn't attacking. He merely stood in the doorway to the warehouse, arms hanging loosely at his side, observing them calmly. Donnie felt his heart hammering wildly inside his chest as he stared back at the creature. He had forgotten just how huge they were.

The wolf took a single step forward, his arms flexing, sharp claws glinting in the light from the overhead lamp. He cocked his head slightly to one side, one ear twitching as though he was listening for something. He didn't carry himself with the enraged violence of the last wolf, but there was something menacing about his calm demeanor.

Donnie glanced over at Raph, waiting for his brother to take the lead, but Raph merely stood silent, his body tensed in preparation for the battle to come.

The gray wolf crouched, muscled bunching.

"We don't have to do this!"

The words were out of Donnie's mouth before his mind consciously decided to speak them. He saw the wolf pause, his gaze narrowing in on Donnie, his expression startled. Donnie felt both of his brother's eyes turn to him as well, and he had to swallow around his suddenly dry throat as he took a small step forward.

"We're not your enemies," he stated firmly, his gaze never leaving the wolf before him, even as his mind frantically recalled all the bits and pieces of information he had gained from Stockman's notes. "We know what happened to you…what Stockman did to you. You may believe this is all that is left for you, but you're wrong. We can help you Victor."

The wolf jerked slightly at the sound of his name, his eyes narrowing slightly. Donnie held his breath, praying that the creature would choose to talk verses attack. He watched as the wolf seemed to consider his words for a moment, his dark gaze boring into Donnie like twin daggers.

"Did you give the same speech to my pack brother before you killed him?"

The wolf's words were softly spoken, but Donnie felt himself flinch regardless. He had feared this response. It was the one barrier he had foreseen in his plans to try and talk to the mutant wolves, and it was a big one.

"We didn't have a choice," he replied quietly. "We were defending our lives."

The wolf scoffed at that, his ears twitching forward. "And this," he asked, sweeping his arm through the air in a gesture that encompassed the unconscious men sprawled around the ground. "Were you just defending yourself here?"

Donnie shook his head slightly, feeling the first tendrils of frustration growing in his chest. He glanced over at his brothers, earning a shrug from Mikey and a slight shake of the head from Raph. They were letting him take the lead with this one, but Donnie could tell from the look on his older brother's face that Raph thought he was only delaying the inevitable.

"What you're doing here is wrong," Donnie stated as firmly as he could. "Using these thugs to rob and steal is only going to get you in trouble. There are other ways to survive."

The wolf let out a harsh snort, shaking his head grimly. "Who are you to tell me right from wrong," he growled, his voice coming out low and dangerous. "Who appointed you judge? You killed my friend. Was that not wrong? His blood is on your hands, and I _will_ avenge him. Tonight you will learn a few things about loyalty, turtle. You don't turn your back on your friends. Not ever!"

Donnie frowned, taken aback by the vehemence in the wolf's tone. He got the distinct impression that the creature was talking about something more than last week's battle, but before he had the chance to ask, the mutant was moving.

Donnie had forgotten how huge they were…he had also forgotten how fast they moved.

With no warning the gray wolf lunged forward, claws extended, his body hurtling straight for Donnie. Belatedly, Donnie realized he had let some of his guard down while talking to the creature. His Bo staff wasn't in the proper position to block the incoming swipe of claws, and he knew he didn't have the time to raise it.

Lucky for him, his brothers had kept themselves better prepared.

Even as the mass of gray fur barreled down on him, he caught movement from the corner of his eye as Mikey leaped forward with lightning speed of his own, twisting his body in mid-air and driving his foot into the side of the wolf, knocking him back and away from Donnie at the last possible second. The move gave Donnie the few precious moments he needed to balance his body and bring his weapon up in front of him. He immediately sank down into a fighting stance, mentally pushing down his disappointment. He had really hoped to avoid another fight, but it seemed talking was now out as a viable alternative.

The wolf recovered quickly from the blow to its side, spinning around and sweeping out with one arm, forcing both Donnie and Mikey to jerk back to avoid being mauled. They were still finding their balance as Raph swept around them, sais extended, a battle cry tearing from his throat as he bore down on the wolf.

The force of Raph's attack drove the wolf back, his body twisting and ducking the slashes and stabs of Raph's weapons. He backpedaled several paces, then, in a move that surprised them all, suddenly dropped down onto one hand, his legs sweeping out in a low spin kick that sent Raph sprawling.

It was a move that Donnie had seen a thousand times…a move that Leo had always favored and had gotten frighteningly good at. It took superb balance and speed, and if not done correctly left one dangerously open to attack. Donnie had lost count of the number of times he had thought he was gaining the upper hand in a fight with his oldest brother only to be taken down by that exact maneuver. Seeing it now, from their enemy, was like a punch to the gut.

But Donnie didn't have much time to think about it. Raph was down, if only for the moment, and he leapt forward to defend his brother until he could find his feet, Mikey right beside him. Between the two of them, they quickly had the wolf on the defensive once more, driving him slowly backward as he fought to avoid their weapons

But the creature wasn't going to be taken down easily.

An empty wooden pallet sat not far from the warehouse doors, and with a quick dive and twist, the wolf grabbed up the entire wooden frame and hurled it at them. Donnie threw himself to one side, feeling the pallet just barely graze the outside of his shoulder. He rolled with the impact, coming up on his feet several feet away, already back in his fighter's stance.

His stomach dropped as he realized Mikey hadn't been quite as lucky as him. His younger brother lay sprawled out on the dirty concrete, one side of his jaw already swelling from where the wooden frame had made contact. Donnie wasn't sure if Mikey was conscious or not, but his brother wasn't making any move to get up, and the gray wolf was quickly bearing down on him.

Donnie didn't hesitate, throwing his Bo staff with all his might straight at the creatures head, knowing it wouldn't stop the wolf, but hoping it would at least slow it down. Somewhere in the back of his mind he could hear Leo admonishing him for throwing his weapon, but he had little choice. He had to do _something_.

Ah, crap!

With that frustrating speed that was beginning to annoy Donnie, the wolf snatched the wooden staff out of the air just moments before it would have struck, pivoting on his feet to face Donnie.

Well, at least his plan had worked. Somewhat. The creature was no longer going after Mikey, which was what Donnie had been after all along. Still, as the wolf changed directions and quickly bore down on him, Donnie had enough sense to know that he was in serious trouble. As good as he was in hand to hand combat, he didn't particularly like the odds against him with an opponent that was not only far bigger, but also far stronger than himself. This didn't look good. Not good at all. He had just given their enemy a weapon!

Good thing he had a brother that specialized in swooping in to save the day.

Raph rejoined the fight, moving in from the side and forcing the creature to halt its advance on Donnie as it now had to divide its attention between the two of them. Raph was playing it cautious, darting in for quick strikes before dancing out of range once more. It was a battle tactic more suited to quick-footed Mikey, but Raph had little choice, having enough sense to know that the close quarter fighting he usually preferred would earn him nothing but a smashed skull now that their enemy had the extended reach offered him by the Bo staff. It was a cat and mouse game, and as he watched helplessly, Donnie couldn't be sure who was the cat and who was the mouse.

"Donnie, check on Mikey!" Raph shouted, continuing to circle and feint, attempting to keep the creatures attention on him.

Donnie glanced quickly to the side, breathing out a silent sigh of relief when he saw Mikey up on his hands and knees, shaking his head dazedly but obviously fighting to regain his senses. "Mikey, get up," Donnie called, whirling back to the battle just in time to catch a flying Bo staff to the face.

Using his moment of distraction, the creature had used his own trick on him, albeit with a bit more success. The thrown staff hit awkwardly, but with enough force to knock Donnie clean off his feet, the right side of his face flaring in pain before going numb. He blinked dazedly up at the sky, his mind screaming at him to get up, but his body refusing to cooperate.

Somewhere in the distance he heard Raph scream in absolute fury, a cry that Donnie had come to recognize was a precursor to nothing but violence. He managed to push himself up on one elbow, blinking his eyes to try and focus, while simultaneously ignoring the dull throbbing that was beginning to make itself known throughout the side of his face.

His searching gaze quickly located his red-banded brother, and he let out a small gasp. Raph had managed to push the wolf back almost all the way to the entrance to the warehouse, his movements driven by fury and desperation. The two combatants were trading blows and strikes at an alarming rate, blood marring both smooth green skin and dark gray fur, neither willing to back down. As impressive as the battle was, Donnie knew his brother wouldn't be able to keep up the pace forever.

He forced himself to his feet, reaching out and gripping his staff from where it had fallen a few feet from him. To his left he could see Mikey had also regained his feet, his eyes fixed with wonder on the raging battle in front of him, his nun chucks already back in his hands and beginning to spin.

It was time to end this.

Donnie took a single step forward, and that's when everything changed.

* * *

Viz was in trouble.

Blade watched, frozen, as the scene unfolded beneath him. He listened to Viz's conversation with the turtles, then watched in awe as the fight erupted with such speed and violence it robbed him of his breath. He stood rooted to the spot, unable to tear his gaze away from the battle below, flinching every time a blow landed, whether on dark fur or smooth green flesh, it didn't matter. His heart was pounding wildly, and he gripped the edge of the roof in a white knuckled grip.

At first it seemed as though Viz was holding his own, overpowering his adversaries through sheer size and strength. But then suddenly the tides turned. With his two companions down, the red masked turtle seemed to go berserk, attacking with such ferocity and speed he soon had Viz back-peddling, working hard to avoid those lethally sharp blades.

Behind the battling pair, Blade could see the other two turtles gaining their feet, weapons in hand, and he knew Viz was out of time. There was no way the gray wolf could hold out for long against the combined might of the three turtles. They were simply too skilled…too quick. They would kill him, just as they had killed Tarin. Blade knew this without a doubt, just as he knew he could no longer watch and do nothing. He wasn't going to stand by while his friend was killed. No way!

With a practiced eye he gauged the distance between himself and the battling duo beneath him, mentally calculating exactly how he would need to jump. Then, without a second thought, he leapt lightly over the edge of the roof, feeling the rush of wind around him as he hurtled downward at an alarming speed. At seemingly the last moment he reached out and grabbed the metal beam of the overhead lamp, his momentum causing him to swing in a complete circle before he let go, his body flying forward at a slight angle.

* * *

Raph never knew what hit him.

One moment he was pressing his attack, his opponent falling back before the fury of his sais, and the next something struck him in the chest with enough force to send him flying backwards through the air.

He landed on his shell with a grunt, but was back up in a flash, adrenaline racing through his veins like wildfire. He half expected to find the wolf barreling down on him, but his opponent was still standing several yards away, a look of weary surprise on his furred face.

Raph's gaze locked onto the form standing in a protective crouch before the wolf, blue bandana tails flapping gently in the evening breeze. He felt his entire body go stiff with shock, his lungs forgetting how to breathe. His eyes widened in disbelief, and he felt his sais slip from his suddenly nerveless fingers to land with a clatter against the pavement at his feet.

It couldn't be!

Raph had never believed in ghosts or spirits, but at that moment he felt certain that was what he was seeing. Or perhaps he had somehow managed to hit his head on the ground when he fell backwards. Either way, he couldn't tear his eyes away from the apparition before him, pain and longing flooding through him, leaving his limbs shaking and his heart racing. The battle was completely forgotten in that moment. Like a man dying in a dessert, his gaze greedily drank in the sight before him, desperate to take it all in before it disappeared again.

He vaguely heard the sound of a surprised gasp from somewhere behind him, but he was too focused on the illusion before him to pay much attention. Then a cry sounded from off to his right, the sound full of excitement and wild, desperate hope.

"Leo!"

From the corner of his eye Raph saw a green and orange blur as Mikey launched himself forward toward the vision of their brother. The sudden movement was enough to break him from his frozen stupor, and he took a stumbling step after his brother.

It was then that the warehouse exploded in a blinding flash of light.

TBC

_Okay, don't hate me. I promise to update as quickly as possible. I have to say, though, reviews really do help feed the muse. So… Oh, and thank you to all of you who have favorited or followed this story. I would really love to hear your thoughts so far. *Hint Hint*_


	11. Chapter 11

_Well, I've had this written for several days, but I couldn't stop tinkering with it. I hope it turned out alright, because I honestly lost all perspective. As always, thanks for all the wonderful comments! I would have a "thank you" party for each and every one of you if I could! Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

There is only so much a turtle can take before reaching the breaking point.

Donatello was smart enough to know that he had reached that point and was currently teetering dangerously on the edge.

It was happening all over again. He felt like he was reliving a horrible nightmare.

Twice in one year he and his brothers had been caught in an explosion. Twice he had been knocked senseless from the force of the blast. Twice he had woken to Raph's bloody face leaning over him. And now, twice he had lost a brother…

"Mikey!"

Raph's anguished call tore through the night, louder than the roar of the flames that were quickly consuming what remained of the warehouse. Donnie winced at the desperation he could clearly read in his brother's tone.

If he was teetering on the edge, then Raph was right there beside him.

Mikey was gone. Their baby brother had disappeared into thin air. All they had were his two nun chucks and the smashed remains of his phone, now safely tucked away in Donnie's belt.

'_Taken.'_

The single word repeated itself over and over again in the back of his mind, because Donnie knew there was really no other explanation. There was no way Mikey would have left his weapons and phone of his own accord, and even less chance he would have left while Donnie and Raph lay unconscious. They hadn't been out for long, but when they had come to, both the wolf and Mikey were gone. It didn't take a genius to know that one and one made two.

But why? Why had the creature taken Mikey, and what exactly was he planning on doing with him? The possibilities were terrifying, and something Donnie didn't really want to put much thought to. He wanted his brother back, and he wanted him back now. Unfortunately all the drifting ash from the fire had obliterated any trail left by their enemy, leaving them with no idea where to even start looking.

Their enemy…and their brother…had vanished without a trace.

Donnie let out a low moan, dropping his aching head into his hands. _'He's still alive!' _he told himself firmly, refusing to believe anything else. He wouldn't allow fear and despair to swallow him whole. His brother needed him. He just had to pull himself together and figure out a way to get Mikey back!

And so help him, if that creature had laid one paw on him…

Dragging his head wearily from his hands, Donnie pulled in a deep breath, coughing slightly on the thick smoke that blanketed the area. With an effort of will he forced his mind into some semblance of calm, moving forward to stand next to his one remaining brother. Raph was standing still as a stature, his gaze lost somewhere in the fiery inferno before them, one side of his face a bloody mask.

"We need to go, Raph," Donnie whispered, reaching out and laying a hand on his brother's shoulder. He had been hearing sirens in the distance for some time, but now they were getting much closer. Dangerously close. The thick smoke might be good enough to hide them from the prying eyes of curious onlookers, but once the firemen and police arrived, the place would be crawling with humans.

It was almost as though Raph didn't hear him. He continued to stare into the fire, his features reflecting the flickering colors of the flames. Donnie was about to repeat himself, when Raph spoke, his voice so low that Donnie almost didn't hear him over the roar of the fire.

"Did you see him, Donnie?"

Donnie flinched back, dropping his hand from his brother's shoulder. He knew immediately who Raph was talking about. The image of his oldest brother standing not fifteen feet in front of him was sharply etched into the back of his mind. It had all happened so fast, Leo seeming to appear out of thin air not five seconds before the warehouse had exploded. Donnie hadn't even had a chance to fully comprehend what was happening. When he had woken up after the blast, there was no sign that Leo had ever been there, and Donnie had half managed to convince himself that it had all been the wild imaginings of his stressed and overly fatigued mind.

But that wouldn't explain how Raph had also seen him. Mikey as well, judging from his brother's wild cry right before the explosion.

It was all too much. He didn't understand it…couldn't explain it, and to say he was feeling overwhelmed by it all would be a vast understatement. What he had seen was impossible. Leo was dead. There had to be some other explanation for what they had all seen. Unfortunately Donnie had no clue what that explanation might be, and he didn't have the time or energy at the moment to try and figure it out.

"Come on, Raph. We need to go," he repeated, choosing for the moment to ignore his brother's question. Right now they needed to focus their attention on getting Mikey back. Everything else would just have to wait.

Raph turned to look at him, his expression carrying all the doubt, fear, and confusion that Donnie was sure was mirrored in his own face. He blinked once, then seemed to fight his way free of his daze, glancing behind Donnie toward the main road where the sound of sirens was growing ever louder. He gave a short nod, then brushed past Donnie, taking off at a slow jog. Donnie ran his gaze over the burned out warehouse one final time before quickly hurrying to catch up.

Less than five minutes later they were back up on the rooftops several blocks away, watching the smoke drift up and disappear in the dark night sky. Neither of them said anything for a long time, both trying desperately to come to grips with the evening's events.

It was Raph who finally broke the silence, his voice soft and laden with guilt. "I promised I wouldn't let anything happen to him."

Donnie glanced over at his brother, watching as Raph slumped despondently against the roof's balustrade. He wasn't sure what to say to comfort his brother, so he simply stated, "we'll find him, Raph."

Raphael turned to look at him, and Donnie couldn't help but flinch. The blood on his brother's face made Raph look like something straight from one of the horror flicks Mikey liked so much. "Damn straight we will," he replied gruffly, fire sparkling deep in the depths of his green eyes.

Donnie felt encouraged by the determination he heard in his brother's voice. It might be only the two of them now, but it wouldn't stop them from getting their little brother back. Nothing would stop them. They _would_ find Mikey. But first they needed some time to regroup, assess their injuries, and come up with a plan.

He was about to open his mouth and suggest they go to April's place, when Raph asked a question that had his words freezing in his throat.

"Do you suppose it was Leo's spirit that we saw?"

Donnie stared at his brother in shock, mouth hanging slightly open, features frozen in surprise at the sudden turn in conversation.

Raph didn't even seem to notice, his gaze lost somewhere distant as he stared out over the night shrouded city. "Maybe he showed up to warn us about the warehouse exploding," he continued, his voice tuned low, almost as though he was talking more to himself than to Donnie.

Donnie had no idea what to say in reply. His denial that ghosts didn't exist got lodged somewhere in his throat, and he couldn't force the words out. He had never believed in spirits, and as far as he knew, neither had Raph. And yet he couldn't deny that the very same notion had been playing around the edges of his own thoughts. Maybe it was simply due to his desperation to come up with some sort of plausible explanation…something that made at least a little sense…something that wasn't completely impossible. He found that a part of him wanted to believe that the spirit of his oldest brother had come to them to warn of danger. It would mean that a part of Leo was still present, still guarding them just as he had in life. It was a thought that brought with it in-measurable comfort and peace.

And yet the analytical part of Donnie just couldn't seem to bring himself to accept it.

Of course, that left only one other possible explanation, and it absolutely terrified him because he knew it truly _was_ impossible. There was no way that Leo was still alive. The small flicker of hope that had ignited in his chest when he had first laid eyes on his oldest brother was still present, and it scared him more than anything else he had ever faced in his entire life. Losing Leo had very nearly destroyed him. If he allowed himself to hope, only to find out he was wrong…?

He honestly didn't think he could survive the loss all over again.

It was all just too overwhelming. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to think. Everything was so jumbled up inside his brain, a sensation that was completely foreign and entirely unwelcome.

Raph turned to glance at him, and Donnie fought to find some kind of answer that would satisfy his brother. But his mind remained stubbornly blank, and he found himself merely opening and closing his mouth several times with no sound coming out. It wasn't very often that he was rendered speechless, but now was definitely one of those times.

Raph must have understood, because he reached out and grabbed Donnie, pulling him in for a quick…and extremely rare…one armed hug. "It's okay, Don," he muttered softly. "We'll talk about it later…when we're all back together. If I know Mikey, he'll have plenty to say on the subject."

Donnie let out a shaky sigh, feeling like a prisoner on death row who had just been granted a temporary stay of execution. "Sounds good to me," he answered quietly. "Thanks, Raph."

* * *

There was one thing that Raphael really appreciated about April; she wasn't a girl given to panic. Sure, she tended to worry too much, and sometimes she could be a bit overprotective, but she never gave in to hysterics like some of the others of her gender. Raph was actually quite proud of how she handled stressful situations. Such as being woken at three in the morning by two battered and bleeding turtles knocking on her window.

Aside from a sharp gasp when she flipped on the light and saw their bloody forms for the first time, she handled the entire situation with admirable calm and grace. She herded them quickly into the dining room, ordered them to sit down, then hurried to the bathroom to grab her first aid kit, which, thanks to Donnie, was extremely well stocked.

"What happened?" she asked breathlessly upon her return, dropping the first aid kit and a handful of rags onto the center of the table. "You guys look like you've been through a warzone." She paused, her eyes going round as her sleep muddled mind finally caught up to the fact that there were only two of them. "Where's Michelangelo?"

Raph exchanged a quick glance with Don before answering in a low tone. "He's gone. But we're going to get him back."

April stared at him with wide eyes, dawning comprehension causing her features to crease into a worried frown. "You went up against the Wolf Gang again, didn't you?" she whispered, the fear in her voice evident.

Raph didn't answer. He didn't need to.

April closed her eyes for a moment, sucking in a deep breath of air in an obvious attempt to calm herself. "Alright," she said quietly, eyes still closed. "I guess it's the usual arrangement then. I stitch and bandage…you talk."

Raph grunted his agreement, settling back in his chair and barely managing to bite back a small groan as his bruised and battered body protested. His adrenaline was fading away, and he was beginning to feel every single cut, bump, and bruise. There were a lot of them.

As April began to clean and care for their wounds, Raph told her about the events of the evening. As he spoke, he couldn't help but analyze ever detail, trying to figure out exactly where he went wrong. It was something he wasn't used to doing. In fact, he could clearly remember ragging on Leo on several occasions for doing the very same thing. Yet now he finally understood exactly why his older brother had done it. As leader, his brother's lives were his responsibility, and to fail them in such a catastrophic way…

The pain from his injuries seemed too small a price to pay.

April worked quickly and efficiently while Raph talked, her movements baring witness to much practice. Donnie was the family medic, but occasionally, when the situation called for it, April would step in to help. Right now, Donnie didn't look like he had the strength to lift a needle and thread, and Raph was grateful they had chosen to come to her.

She was busy stitching a gash on the back of Donnie's shoulder when Raph reached the part of the story where Leo had appeared. He stuttered to a halt, glancing quickly over at his brother. Donnie's eyes were focused on a spot on the table in front of him, his expression distant. He didn't even seem to be aware of April as she worked over him.

Raph cleared his throat, then decided for the moment to skip any mention of Leo. He was still struggling to get his own mind around what he had seen, and wasn't prepared for the questions April would undoubtedly have. He still felt a flare of excitement every time he thought about it, the emotion in strange juxtapose to the worry and guilt eating away at him over Mikey. He knew he hadn't had the time yet to let it truly sink in, to really think about all that Leo's appearance might mean. But it would have to wait until after his little brother was home safe. Right now he couldn't afford the distraction.

He finished his story with the explosion of the warehouse and waking up to find both the wolf and Mikey gone. April let out a long sigh when he finally lapsed into silence, neatly finishing off the last stitch on Donnie's shoulder. "I was afraid of something like this," she murmured softly. "You guys got lucky."

Raph grunted, reaching up a hand to finger the five neat stitches that ran across the right side of his forehead. "Lucky?" he repeated incredulously. "Mikey's missing and Donnie and I both look like we went ten rounds with Leatherhead. Tell me how that's lucky?"

"Because you're alive," April replied firmly, beginning to gather the scattered supplies from the first aid kit and replacing them, her movements focused and brisk. "I don't know why the wolf took Mikey, but he could have just as easily killed you all where you lay. The fact that you're here right now means you are _incredibly_ lucky."

Raph hadn't really thought of it that way, but he supposed April had a point. He just wished the wolf had chosen to take _him_ instead of his brother.

"So what are you going to do now?" April asked, grabbing the bloody rag and bowl of stained water from the center of the table and taking it over to the sink.

Raph glanced over at Donnie. His brother should have looked better now that some of the blood and dirt had been washed from his body, but he didn't. He looked worn and exhausted, slouched in his chair with his head hanging low. Raph knew he couldn't look much better. As much as he wanted to get started on the search for their brother immediately, he knew they would have to rest and regain some strength first. They wouldn't do Mikey any good if they were too exhausted to fight.

"We'll go home and get some rest," Raph replied simply, forcing his aching body up and out of his chair, proud when he managed it without a single groan. "Once it gets dark we'll start searching. We know where their home territory is, so we'll begin there. There can't be _that_ many places for them to hide."

Donnie let out a weary snort, not bothering to lift his gaze from the spot he was still staring at on the table. "You have no idea how many abandoned buildings and old warehouses there are up there, do you?"

Raph frowned down at his brother. "It doesn't matter. We'll search every one if we have to."

Donnie didn't answer, and Raph felt a flare of irritation that he quickly worked to stifle. It had been a long and difficult night, and Donnie had to be feeling overwhelmed by all that had transpired. He knew _he_ certainly was.

"You won't have to search alone," April stated confidently into the sudden silence. "I'll talk to Casey today. His arm is still in a sling, but that doesn't mean he can't help you look. And I'll do what I can as well. Stop by here tonight and I'll have a list of all the abandoned and condemned buildings in the area."

"Thanks April," Raph grunted, casting her a grateful nod. "And thanks for patching us up as well."

April gave him a wan smile. "I can't say it's my favorite thing to do, but…any time you guys need me I'll be here."

Raph returned her smile with a small one of his own, before moving over to Donnie's chair and holding out a single hand to help his brother rise. Donnie stared at the proffered hand for a moment before grabbing it and allowing Raph to haul him to his feet. He swayed slightly once upright, but Raph was quick to steady him.

"You know the worst part isn't over yet," Donnie muttered suddenly, lifting tired eyes to meet Raph's gaze.

"What do you mean?" Raph asked, frowning slightly.

"I mean…," his brother answered despondently, "now we have to go home and tell Master Splinter what happened. Something tells me he's not going to take the news all that well."

Raph unconsciously flinched at his brother's words, cringing inwardly at the thought of admitting to his father and master how he had failed. He knew Splinter wouldn't blame him, but that somehow made everything that much worse, because Raph certainly blamed himself.

"We'll keep the story simple," he stated softly, catching Donnie's eyes and hoping his brother understood his unspoken message. "There's no need to worry him any further than necessary."

The truth was, Splinter had aged a lot since Leo's death…so much so that Raph found himself worrying about the old rat's health. While part of him wanted to seek his father's wisdom in regards to Leo's appearance, a larger part worried what Splinter's reaction might be if they told him what they had seen. He wasn't sure his father would be able to handle the news. Their Sensei's heart just wasn't as strong as it used to be. Maybe later, when Mikey returned home safely…but certainly not before then.

Donnie nodded once, his expression showing that he understood and agreed. After a final thanks to April, the brothers silently slipped from the apartment window and down to the street below, disappearing into the sewers just as the first tinges of dawn lit up the horizon.

* * *

He couldn't sleep.

Donnie let out a small sigh, staring up at the dark ceiling above his bed. He was beyond exhausted, the physical beating he had taken leaving him feeling weary and drained. He knew he needed to rest so he could regain his strength, for Mikey's sake if nothing else, and yet he couldn't seem to find sleep no matter how hard he tried. The events at the warehouse kept playing through his mind over and over again, like a broken record that couldn't be shut off. His thoughts were like a ping-pong, bouncing around from one thing to another until his head felt like it would explode. For someone who prided himself in being organized and structured in every aspect of his life, including his own mind, it was pure torture.

How could he sleep when Mikey was out there alone somewhere, possibly hurt and undoubtedly in great danger?

How could he sleep when not three hours earlier he had miraculously seen Leo for the first time in over six months?

How could he sleep with the image of Master Splinter, head bowed and shoulders hunched with grief at the news of losing yet another son, floating around inside his head?

He couldn't help but feel like the very foundations of his world had been knocked off balance, and yet somehow he was supposed to just go to sleep? Yeah right!

With a grunt, he pushed his aching body upright on his bed, his hands clenching the bed sheets in two tight fists. This was ridiculous. He wasn't going to be able to sleep, so there was no use in trying…not when there were better things he could be doing, like fixing Mikey's phone. After all, his brother would be needing it soon. The solitude of his lab was where he had spent many a sleepless night in the past, and that was where he would go now. If he was lucky, he would be able to drown his troubled thoughts in work.

He slipped quietly from his room, but never made it downstairs, stopping instead outside Raphael's room, staring at the closed wooden door in sudden indecision.

There had been a time, back when he was younger and before he'd had his own lab, when he would seek out one of his brothers to help keep him company on sleepless nights. Leo had been surprisingly patient with his late night visits, and Mikey had always been up for a middle-of-the-night movie. He'd never really gone to Raph though, mostly due to the fact that his red-banded brother tended to get incredibly cranky when he didn't get enough sleep, and when Raph wasn't happy…_nobody_ was happy.

Things had changed after Leo's death, though. Each of them had faced sleepless nights where the pain and grief simply would not let go, and they had learned to reach out to each other during such times…even Raph. After countless nights of hanging with his older brother in the lab or on the couch watching late night TV, Donnie felt closer to Raphael than he had ever felt before. He knew he could go to his brother with anything, and right now that was precisely what he needed…someone to talk to. He hadn't been ready before, and he still wasn't entirely sure if he was ready now, but somehow he felt compelled to at least try.

Reaching out he carefully turned the handle, pushing the door silently inward. If Raph was asleep, he would leave his brother alone, but somehow he doubted it. He found it hard to believe that Raph would be having any more luck sleeping than he was.

Sure enough, the dim light from the hall revealed a dark room and an empty hammock. Donnie turned to leave when his brother's soft voice brought him up short.

"Donnie?"

Donnie jerked in surprise, his gaze flying to the far corner of the room. He could just barely make out his brother's dim form seated on the floor, shell to the wall and knees pulled up in front of him. He looked strangely vulnerable in that position, and Donnie found himself slightly taken aback. He had expected to find Raph downstairs in the dojo, beating the stuffing out of his bag, not sitting alone in the corner of his dark room. It wasn't really like Raph.

Then again, his brother had changed a lot over the last several months. He was calmer and more mature, and though he still displayed occasional bouts of temper, overall he seemed much more in control of his anger. He had also grown more introspective…almost as though he were channeling Leo in some crazy way.

"Well, are you going to come inside, or stand in the hallway gaping at me all night?"

The sarcasm and impatience were the same, however.

Donnie moved inside, keeping the door open to provide at least a modicum of light. He moved over to where Raph was sitting, sliding down the wall to sit next to his brother, their shoulders just barely touching.

"You okay?" Donnie asked softly, glancing at his brother's profile in the dim light. He knew how hard Raph was taking the loss of Mikey, just as he knew that Raph blamed himself for what had happened. His brother was definitely channeling Leo, right down to shouldering all the guilt and blame for something he had no control of.

"Yeah," Raph grunted in reply, his tone low and anything but believable, his gaze fixed on a spot somewhere in the room directly in front of him.

"We'll get him back, Raph," Donnie whispered, forcing as much confidence into his tone as he was able. He didn't waste time trying to convince his brother that none of this was his fault, knowing it would be as useless as it had always been with Leo.

What was it with leaders and their annoying tendency to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders?

There was a beat of silence before Raph replied simply, "I know."

Raph didn't say anything else, and they sat in companionable silence for several long minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally Donnie spoke, his voice hesitant and unsure as he brought up the topic that had been haunting him for hours. "So.." he cleared his throat nervously. "You really think it was Leo's spirit that we saw last night?"

Raph stiffened slightly at the question, finally turning to look at Donnie fully for the first time. His eyes glittered in the dim light as he gave a small shrug. "What else could it be?" he answered softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "I've gone over it again and again inside my head, and that's the only explanation I can come up with…the only thing that makes sense." He paused, and Donnie could clearly see the pain in his dark gaze. "There's no way Leo could have gotten free from that debris, Donnie."

Donnie nodded, unable to argue the point no matter how much he might want to. He could remember the night his oldest brother had died as clearly as if it had happened yesterday, the final moments with Leo something that would haunt him for the rest of his life. Raph was right…there was no way his brother could have escaped. He hated to admit it, but Raph's theory was sounding more and more plausible. Now he just wished he could figure out how he was supposed to feel about it all. Excited? Disappointed? Comforted? Concerned? In one way or another he felt them all, and the mixture of emotions was more than a little overwhelming.

He just missed his brother, and last night's encounter just made the pain that much sharper. He wished he'd had a chance to talk to Leo, to try and communicate with him in some manner. If Leo really _was_ a spirit, was tonight's events a onetime thing? A warning from beyond the veil or some such? Or could they expect to see him again sometime in the future? Donnie just wished he knew what to expect. He had never liked the unknown.

"It just…" Raph began softly before trailing off, his gaze fixed on the floor between his upraised knees, his expression torn.

"Just what?" Donnie pressed, nudging his brother gently with his shoulder.

"…It just…seemed so…real." Raph haltingly replied, his voice hesitant. "_He _seemed so real." He looked up, leveling Donnie with an intense gaze, his expression torn and confused. "He kicked me in the chest, Donnie. Can spirits even do that?"

Donnie shook his head, letting out a small sigh. "I'm not exactly an expert on the supernatural, Raph," he replied quietly. "I have no idea what they supposedly can and cannot do."

Raph grunted. "Yeah," he muttered, his head falling back against the wall behind him with a small thump. "It all just happened so fast…I don't really know _what _to think, ya know?"

Donnie certainly did know.

He let his own head fall back against the wall, closing his eyes and trying to picture the whole thing again in his mind. Raph had been pushing the wolf back into a slow retreat, Mikey and Donnie mere seconds from joining him in the attack. Donnie had glanced over at Mikey, and when he had turned back, Raph was flying through the air. He had watched Raph long enough to make sure he was okay before turning back to the wolf. And that was when he had seen him…

Leonardo.

A shiver ran up his spine at the memory of his oldest brother standing right in front of him, shoulders forward and knees slightly bent in a fighter's stance. His features had been cast in shadow by the overhead lamp, but there had been no mistaking the blue mask around his eyes. Even now, Donnie felt his pulse quicken with the same wonder and excitement that had gripped him back at the warehouse.

Raph was right, Leo had seemed so real.

Donnie held the mental picture in his mind, analyzing every little detail, converting it all to a single, precious memory. The way Leo was standing, the blue bandana tails waving in the wind, the play of light off leaf green skin… Suddenly he sat bolt upright, his eyes shooting open and his mind whirling as a single, startling realization struck home.

"He had a bandage," he whispered, more to himself than to his brother. "On his arm…"He turned to look at Raph, his eyes wide and his breathing picking up speed. "He had a bandage," he repeated, his voice rising in his growing excitement, his heart pounding wildly inside his chest.

Raph frowned at him, and Donnie could tell his brother had no idea what he was talking about. "Okay," he muttered in obvious confusion. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Donnie shook his head, trying desperately to gather his thoughts and calm his body. He knew his mind was heading down a dangerous path…one that could possibly lead to more pain and heartache, but there was no closing the door now that it had been opened.

"I don't know about spirits being able to kick people," he stated slowly, his gaze locking on to that of his brothers. "But I've never heard of a spirit needing a bandage before, and I've definitely never heard of a spirit that bled. And there was blood on that bandage, Raph…I'm sure of it!"

Raph stared at him, his eyes two large, round pools reflecting back the dim light drifting in from the hallway. "Just what are you saying, Donnie?" he asked hoarsely, his body tense and his voice strained.

Donnie swallowed hard, unable to answer past the wild hope blossoming inside his chest. He wasn't just imagining things. It was such a tiny detail, and yet the more he thought about, the more certain he became. It wasn't a spirit they had seen…it was their brother. Their real-life, walking, talking, breathing…and bleeding… brother. He didn't understand how or why, but he couldn't bring himself to care about all that at the moment.

Leo was alive!

His oldest brother was alive!

He couldn't even begin to comprehend the sweep of emotions that flooded through him in that instant, leaving him unsure whether he should weep or laugh out loud.

Unfortunately Raph wasn't sharing in his exhilaration. "I know what you're thinking Donnie, but I'm telling you, it doesn't make sense," he argued, lifting one hand to rub wearily at the side of his head. "How would he have escaped that tunnel? Where has he been all this time? Why would he appear only to disappear again?" He shook his head, repeating in a small voice, "It doesn't make sense."

"It doesn't matter," Donnie cut in, reigning in his wild excitement and joy with a monumental effort of will. "I don't have the answers to all those questions, Raph, but I plan on figuring it out. As soon as we get Mikey back, I'm going to get to the bottom of this. No matter what it takes, I'm going to find Leo!"

Raph shook his head, his expression anguished. "And what if you're wrong, Donnie?" He whispered softly. "You're just setting yourself up to get hurt. You have no idea how much I want to believe that Leo's alive, but it's just not possible."

Donnie merely shook his head. "I'm not wrong." He stated firmly. "I know I'm right on this, Raph. Leo _is _alive! I just _know _it."

Raph swore softly, jerking his gaze away from Donnie and staring out into the dark room. "God, I hope you're right, Donnie," he muttered softly, his voice anything but hopeful. "For _all_ our sakes…I hope you're right!"

TBC

_Well, there you have it. Donnie believes but Raph is still doubting. Now, what about Mikey…? Hmmm. Guess you'll just have to stay tuned and find out. Oh, and as always, please leave a review and let me know what you think! _


	12. Chapter 12

_Sorry for the lateness. It is that crazy time of year when school starts up again. _

_Thank you to all of you who have stuck with me this far and who constantly encourage me with your thoughts and comments. If I didn't get a chance to respond to you, please know that I am very grateful!_

_Now, without further ado…_

* * *

Why did it always have to be his head?

Mikey scrunched his eyes closed in a vain attempt to ease the intense throbbing that was currently encasing his skull. Nausea curled somewhere deep in his belly, and he fought the urge to be sick. The left side of his face felt stiff and itchy from the dried blood that had crusted there, the sharp metallic scent only adding to the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach.

After a few moments of simply breathing, he peeled his eyes open and let his gaze sweep across the tiny confines of the room he was being held in. It looked like some kind of storage room, complete with a dusty pile of forgotten boxes stacked in one corner. A single window high on the opposite wall let in faint tendrils of predawn light, the soft glow illuminating the wooden door currently standing closed directly across from him.

Moving slowly so as to not aggravate his aching head, he carefully craned his neck back so he could peer up at the heavy chains bolted to the ceiling, holding him suspended a couple of inches off the floor. His wrists stung from where metal cuffs cut into them, and his arms ached from holding his body weight. He felt like a slab of meat hung out to dry.

With a small moan he let his chin fall back down to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut once more. He had no idea where he was, but it didn't take a genius to know that he was in a whole lot of trouble.

He struggled to remember exactly what had happened to him, but his thoughts were too jumbled and confused, the fierce ache in his head making it impossible to concentrate. All he had were a bunch of flashing images and impressions that made absolutely no sense. He thought there had been some kind of explosion, but even that was pretty foggy.

"Okay guys," he muttered softly. "Time to sweep in to the rescue…"

This thought made him frown, because he honestly didn't know where his brothers were. For all he knew they could have been captured as well. They could be hanging somewhere in a room right next to his waiting for _him_ to rescue them. It was a sobering thought that did nothing to ease the nausea in his belly.

He gave a few experimental tugs on the chains holding him, but all he accomplished was increasing the ache in his wrists and setting his body to swaying slightly. Not such a good idea when he was a few dry swallows away from losing everything he had ever eaten.

'_Okay, think Mikey,' _he told himself firmly, then couldn't hold back a small smile as his mind supplied him with Raphael's sarcastic reply to that internal comment.

He hoped Raph was okay. Donnie too. He couldn't stand not knowing what had happened to them. If he was going to lose pieces of his memory every time he got hit on the head, he would have to consider wearing a helmet every time he came to the surface. It was an amusing thought that carried absolutely no relevance if he didn't first figure out a way to get out of this mess.

He was just beginning to build up the courage to give a few more yanks on the chain holding him when the door swung open with an annoying high-pitch screech that did absolutely nothing for his headache. Geez, hadn't these guys ever heard of WD-40?

When he finally convinced his eyelids to peel open once more, he found himself face to face with two massive, mutated wolves. Even hanging a few inches off the floor he found he had to look up slightly to look them in the eye. In the dim light filtering in from the window, both their eyes seemed to glow a faint red color, and he couldn't hold back the shiver that slid down his spine.

He recognized the gray wolf immediately, his fractured memories supplying him enough information to remember fighting the creature with his brothers at a warehouse. Bits and pieces of that battle fluttered through his aching brain like tiny slips of paper in a ticker-tape parade, too numerous to even think about trying to latch on to.

He was fairly certain he had never seen the tawny colored wolf before. The creature was sending out some seriously creepy vibes, staring at Mikey with a cool and calculating gaze, like a fish observing a worm on a hook right before gobbling it up. The mental image was so vivid, Mikey found himself speaking before thinking.

"Please don't eat me. I promise I don't taste very good."

The gray wolf let out a soft snort, but the tawny colored one merely narrowed his eyes and took a single step closer, looming over Mikey in what was almost certainly supposed to be an act of intimidation. Mikey would never admit it, but it was working. Yikes, these creatures were huge!

"What is your name, boy?" the brown wolf asked, his voice low and menacing.

Mikey opened his mouth to reply when a sudden thought struck him. It was more a realization, really. The only reason these creatures would have taken him prisoner was if they were after something, and that something was probably information. He wasn't sure exactly what kind of information, but it stood to reason that as soon as they obtained what they were looking for, they would have no more use for him. He'd watched enough spy movies to know what would happen to him then.

He closed his mouth with an audible click, his jaw clenching in stubborn determination.

The tawny wolf glared at him, baring its teeth in a threatening snarl. "Do not test me, boy. I _will_ hurt you."

Mikey had no doubt the wolf meant what he said. His heart fluttered wildly inside his chest, but he kept his mouth firmly closed. He knew what would be coming next, but if he could hold out long enough, perhaps he could buy himself a little more time…time for his brothers to find him or time to figure out a way to escape. He had to try.

Even knowing it was coming, he wasn't completely prepared for the explosion of pain as the wolf lashed out with a backhanded blow across his face, knocking his head back violently. He'd thought his headache couldn't possibly get any worse, but he was wrong. Stars danced across his vision, and bile climbed up the back of his throat. His cheek throbbed and burned, and he could feel the side of his face beginning to swell.

"Who are you?" the wolf demanded again. "Where did you come from? Did Stockman create you? Did he send you to find us?"

Mikey barely heard the barrage of questions beneath the buzzing sound in his ears. The wolf's next blow landed on his side, right in the gap between shell and plastron. It drove all the air from his lungs and sent his body swaying wildly, the pressure on his wrists growing to the point he feared dislocation. A low grunt slipped out between his tightly clenched teeth, and he fought to catch his breath past the pain.

"Answer me!" the wolf roared, landing another blow to his captive's side. At this point in time it was all Mikey could do to remain conscious. The fierce pain in his side, combined with the strain on his wrists and arms and the stabbing agony through his skull was causing his vision to fade in and out. The buzzing in his ears had grown to a roar, and he knew all it would take was one more blow and he would either pass out or throw up. Not very pleasant, but it would serve his captors right.

The blow he was expecting never landed. By the time his body stopped swaying and his thoughts cleared slightly, both wolves had taken a step back away from him. They were murmuring together in soft tones, apparently discussing what their next course of action should be. Mikey knew he should try listening in, but he was simply hurting too badly to bother.

Instead, he closed his eyes and focused on just breathing. He didn't think the wolf had managed to break any of his ribs, but he certainly hadn't been giving him love taps either.

A breath of warm air across his face caused him to open his eyes, and this time it was the gray wolf that stood before him. The creature's eyes lacked the coldness of his companion, but his expression was grim.

"You would do well to answer our questions, young one. If you do not, you will not care for the consequences," he stated softly.

If he'd had the strength, Mikey would have snorted in disbelief. It seemed they were going for the whole good cop, bad cop routine. It was almost amusing, and if he wasn't already hurting so bad, he would have laughed. They obviously didn't know he had grown up with two older brothers who personified those two personalities. Leo had always tried to reason and cajole information out of him, while Raph would just hold him in a headlock until he got whatever he was after. If Mikey could learn to deal with them for over fifteen years, he wasn't about to cave to these two amateurs.

The gray wolf must have seen the resolve in Mikey's gaze, because he let out a small sigh, shaking his head as he stepped back beside his companion. "Foolish choice," he admonished quietly.

Mikey tensed, waiting for whatever was to come next, but both his captors merely turned and headed for the door. Mikey watched them go with no small amount of confusion. He wanted to feel relieved, but a growing sense of trepidation settled in the pit of his stomach, causing his heart to accelerate.

They obviously had something else planned for him, and he wasn't at all looking forward to finding out what it was.

* * *

Blade was sitting cross-legged on his cot when Viz entered the room.

He fought to keep his expression neutral as he glanced up at his friend, but he couldn't keep his fists from clenching at his sides. He had been ordered to the room as soon as they had returned to the warehouse, and to say that he was frustrated by the whole situation would be a vast understatement.

Viz stood looking down at him for a long moment, his expression unreadable. The fur on his left shoulder was matted with dried blood from a wound he had taken when the warehouse exploded. He had been lucky. His larger frame and thick fur had protected him from more serious injury, and he in turn had protected Blade by shielding him against the force of the blast.

The other turtles hadn't been so lucky.

Before the echo of the explosion had even faded, Viz had hauled Blade to his feet, grabbed the nearest unconscious turtle, and taken off. They hadn't spoken a word during the entire trip back to the warehouse…not until Viz had ordered him to the room before disappearing down the hallway with his still unconscious burden. That was over an hour ago, and Blade was more than ready for some answers.

"Are you okay?" Viz asked quietly, his dark eyes appraising the young turtle steadily.

Blade shrugged. His injured arm was aching fiercely and his throat was still bothering him, but it wasn't anything he couldn't deal with. "I'll be fine," he answered lowly. "You?"

Viz cast a dismissive glance toward his shoulder before turning and grinning down at Blade. "I've cut myself worse shaving," he replied lightly.

Blade didn't return his grin. He was wound far too tight to allow a little light banter to distract him. "The turtle?" he said simply, knowing Viz would understand what it was he was asking.

Viz's smile faded, and he shook his head slightly before crouching down and facing Blade directly. "He's awake," he stated simply. "Alpha and I had a little chat with him, but he's not being very talkative."

Blade frowned, shifting on his cot. He knew exactly what kind of questions Alpha would have been asking. They were the same questions he himself had faced before the gang leader had realized he had no memory with which to supply the answers. He understood now why Viz had taken the other turtle. They would be seeking the information that Blade had been unable to provide them.

"What will Alpha do?" he asked, trying to keep his voice casual and indifferent.

Viz sighed, glancing down at the ground before lifting his gaze and answering softly. "Alpha plans to let Two Toes question him as soon as he returns later this afternoon. He thinks he'll have better luck convincing him to talk."

Blade flinched, feeling his mouth go suddenly dry. "You mean Alpha plans to have Two Toes torture the information out of him," he replied tightly, a strange tension beginning to build in his stomach. "He'll kill him, Viz. You know he will!"

Viz regarded him calmly. "Perhaps," he answered softly. "But we have to know if he is working for Stockman. We have to know if we are in danger here."

Blade stared at his friend, unable to answer past the sudden wild fear trying to claw its way up his throat. He wasn't sure what to make of this reaction. He shouldn't care. It shouldn't matter what happened to the other turtle.

And yet somehow it did.

Viz must have sensed some of his conflict. "He's our enemy, Blade," he reminded him quietly. "They have already killed one of our own. I suppose it is only natural that you feel some affinity toward them, but don't forget that they left you to die. It is time you move on and accept the new life you have been given."

Blade dropped his gaze, staring down at the thin mat beneath him. He knew Viz was right, but somehow that knowledge didn't seem to help any. Why did he feel a strange protectiveness over the captive turtle? Why did the thought of turning him over to Two Toes fill him with such dread and alarm? He didn't _want_ to care. It just complicated things.

Viz let out a quiet sigh. "Alpha wants to debrief me about the mission tonight. I wanted to check on you first, but he will be waiting. You need to sleep Blade."

Blade nodded slowly, swallowing down his doubt and fear with a sheer effort of will. "Go." He forced a lightness he didn't feel into his voice, looking up long enough to give Viz a small smile. "I think I can tuck myself in on my own…just this once."

Viz let out a soft huff of amusement, his gaze softening slightly. "I'll be back soon," he promised, rising from his crouch and looking down at Blade. "Just let us handle all this," he added. "You don't need to get involved."

Blade didn't bother answering, merely nodded. He watched as Viz left the room, then pushed himself to his feet and headed toward the medicine chest in the back of the room. Kneeling before the chest, he lifted the heavy lid and reached for one of the pre-filled syringes lying inside. He pulled one free, then lowered the lid.

Returning to his bed he sank down on the thin mattress, holding the syringe loosely in his lap. He sat there for a long time, staring down at the needle, his breath slow and even, nothing in his outward appearance betraying the internal struggle currently being waged within. Finally, after several long minutes, he lifted the syringe, thrust the needle home, and depressed the plunger.

Once the syringe was empty, he removed the needle from the cloth of his mattress, then tossed it aside, making sure it landed in the empty space between the two beds where Viz would be sure to see it. Then he lay down on his side and closed his eyes, forcing his body into stillness as he prepared to wait. Without the drug in his system he knew he didn't need to worry about accidently falling asleep.

It was almost an hour later when Viz finally returned. Blade sensed him as he moved quietly into the room, pausing directly above the turtle's cot. Blade remained perfectly still, his breathing deep and even, his eyes firmly closed.

After a moment he heard Viz move over to his own bed, the creak of wood and the soft rustle of cloth indicating the wolf had lain down. Blade remained motionless, listening intently to the soft huffs of breath and shifting coming from across the room. Eventually Viz's movements ceased and his breath deepened perceptibly, but still Blade waited, silently counting out the minutes in his head until he was absolutely sure his friend was soundly asleep.

Then he opened his eyes.

Sitting up silently on the bed, he glanced over at his sleeping companion before pushing himself soundlessly to his feet. His heart was pounding wildly inside his chest as he strapped his sword securely to his back, a portion of his mind wondering what the hell he thought he was doing. He had no illusions as to just how big of a risk he was about to take. If he was discovered, he doubted even Viz would be able to get him out of the trouble he would be in. Yet something beyond himself was compelling him onward, and he didn't think he could stop now even if he wanted to.

Moving as silently as possible he slipped from the room and down the dim hallway, using what shadows he could to mask his movements. The warehouse was mostly deserted, which made sense considering the early morning hour. Most of their human companions had already gone home and wouldn't be back until late afternoon. Blade could only hope that his fellow mutants would be using the peace and quiet to get some rest of their own.

After a brief moment of consideration, he headed toward the south end of the warehouse. There were several small rooms that had once stored the warehouse's more valuable inventory. Each of the rooms could be locked from the outside, and Blade guessed that this would be were Viz would have taken the prisoner.

He approached cautiously, knowing there would be a guard posted. Sure enough, as he peered around the final bend in the hallway, he immediately spotted a man leaning against the wall near the door to the first storage room. The man was smoking a cigarette and looking incredibly bored as he twirled an old fashioned key ring around his fingers.

Ducking back around the corner, Blade allowed his eyes to close as he thought about his next move. A moment later he reopened them, glancing around the dirty floor at his feet until he found a small rock. Stooping down, he picked up the rock, peered back around the corner, then hurled the small stone in a high arc down toward the other end of the hallway. The rock soared silently over the guard's head to land with a soft clatter twenty yards further down the hall. The man immediately jerked to attention, turning to face the direction of the noise, his hand flying to the handle of the gun tucked into the waist line of his pants.

"Who's there?" he called out gruffly, squaring his feet and peering intently down the dim hallway.

Blade moved swiftly and silently, sliding around the corner and reaching the guard in two long strides. The man was still staring intently in the opposite direction as Blade's hand came down in a short but powerful chop to the junction of shoulder and neck. The guard collapsed boneless to the ground, his eyes rolling up into the back of his head.

Blade leaned over and grabbed the key ring from the man's limp grasp, then straightened and turned to face the door. For the first time since leaving his room he found himself suddenly hesitating, unsure of what he would face on the other side. Like Alpha, he had come here in search of answers…answers to the questions that had haunted him mercilessly ever since he had learned of these other turtle's existence.

And yet suddenly he doubted his ability to get those answers. What made him think that the captive turtle would be any more willing to talk to him than he had to Alpha and Viz? What if he downright refused to speak to him? Would he be able to force the answers from the prisoner as Alpha planned to do with Two Toes?

For some reason, the very thought left him feeling sick and upset.

But he was desperate. Desperate to know about his past. Desperate to understand what had happened to him. The truth was, this might be the only chance he would get to find those answers, and he couldn't let such an opportunity go by without even trying. He had already risked everything to get to this point, he wasn't about to turn back now.

With renewed resolve, he lifted the key to the lock.

* * *

Mikey was beyond exhausted. His whole body ached terribly and his wrists were on fire from the last hour of trying to wiggle his way free of the metal cuffs. But they were simply too tight, and all he'd managed to accomplish was tearing the skin around his wrists, sending small rivulets of blood running down his forearms. Reluctantly he'd been forced to admit defeat.

He knew he should probably try and get some rest, but that was far easier said than done. His brothers had always claimed that he could fall asleep in just about any position, but apparently that didn't include hanging half a foot off the ground by his wrists. That was uncomfortable enough by itself, but add to it his still throbbing head and aching ribs, and sleep became all but impossible. Desperate and in pain, he tried some meditation techniques to take his mind off his discomfort, with only moderate success.

The high pitched squeal of the door had him jerking in his bonds, his head lifting and his gaze pinned to the entrance. He had known his captors wouldn't leave him alone for long, and he tried to mentally prepare himself for whatever might come next.

The light from the window behind him reflected off green skin as a familiar shape slipped quietly into the room, and Mikey felt his breath catch in his throat as hope flared brightly within him. His brothers had found him! They had come for him!

Then the figure stepped closer and Mikey felt his heart stop in his chest, his eyes widening in shock, his mind unable for a moment to comprehend exactly what…or who…he was seeing.

"Good, you're awake."

The words were softly spoken, but they still had a profound effect on Mikey, jumpstarting his heart and causing him to jerk within his bonds. Even if his eyes had somehow been playing tricks on him, his ears instantly recognized the voice, the sound so sweet and familiar it brought a stinging ache to his eyes.

It was a voice he had never thought to hear again.

"Leo!' the gasp tore from his throat, raw and desperate. His heart began to hammer wildly inside his chest, any disbelief and doubt he might have held quickly being buried beneath a wave of sheer joy and relief. Somehow, against all odds, his brother was here…alive! It was almost too much to process. He cried out Leo's name again, this time louder, his eyes stinging with tears, his arms yanking futility at the chains binding him, longing to break free and embrace the brother he had thought gone forever.

Surprisingly, Leo gave no reaction to his desperate call other than to tilt his head slightly to one side, his expression thoughtful. "So that was my name," he murmured softly, his voice tuned so low that Mikey wasn't sure if he had heard him correctly.

Mikey instantly grew still, staring down at his brother in surprise, his overwhelming joy and excitement slowly diminishing as his gaze locked with that of his brother. Leo was looking at him calmly, arms crossed loosely over his chest, his expression cool and distant. He made no move to come any closer, and Mikey felt a growing sense of confusion and bewilderment.

Something wasn't right.

Why was Leo just standing there? Why was his brother making no attempt to free him? And why was Leo looking at him as though he were a complete stranger?

"I have some questions for you, and I suggest, for your own good, that you answer them."

The breath caught in Mikey's chest at the coldness in Leo's tone. A chill went down his spine that had nothing to do with the temperature. Something was definitely wrong…very wrong. This wasn't his brother standing before him. Sure, it was Leo's body, Leo's voice…but the dark gaze now boring into his own carried none of the light and compassion that had always reflected in his brother's blue eyes. It was like he was looking at a stranger dressed in his brother's body. He shivered again, swallowing hard in an attempt to force down the lump growing in his throat.

"Leo," he whispered for a third time, his voice coming out soft and hesitant. "What's wrong…"

Leo arched one eye ridge, his expression turning bitter. "Why would anything be wrong?" he replied shortly, his tone harsh and unpleasant. "Just answer my questions, and I'll leave you alone. You'll never have to see me again."

This couldn't be real.

Mikey squeezed his eyes closed, blocking out the image of his brother's angry face. He tried desperately to make sense of what was happening. Perhaps his injuries were more serious than he'd thought and he was hallucinating. Or maybe he had fallen asleep after all and this was just some kind of nightmare brought on by his stressed and fatigued mind. It wouldn't be the first time Leo had visited him in his dreams, though never before like this. Never so cold and angry.

The hope and joy that had filled him just moments earlier drained away to be replaced by bitter disappointment. For a moment he had let himself believe that his brother was somehow still alive. He should have known better. It wasn't possible, and he was nothing more than a fool. He felt the burn of tears beneath his tightly closed lids, but forcefully pushed them back. Now was not the time to fall apart. He had to keep it together.

Willing his mind back to reality, he slowly reopened his eyes, fully expecting the vision of his brother to be gone. But Leo was still standing there, arms crossed over his chest, regarding him with the same coldness as before. "Something wrong?" he asked softly, a hint of sarcasm tinging the edges of his voice.

"This isn't happening," Mikey whispered, more to himself than to the hallucination in front of him. "You're dead!" His voice grew louder as he tried to will away the painful illusion. "My brother is dead!" It was the first time he had stated those words out loud, and his heart gave an agonizing lurch, the moisture that had been building behind his eyes finally escaping in a single tear that ran a quick path down his cheek and off his chin.

For a split second the cold mask on Leo's face dropped, revealing shocked surprise. "Brother?" he repeated, his wide eyes locked on Mikey's face. "You're my brother?"

Mikey didn't think he could take this anymore. He almost wished his captors would return and continue their torment…anything to wake him from this horrible nightmare he seemed trapped in.

Leo took a step forward, peering up into his face, his eyes darkening even further in what Mikey could only interpret as anger. From this close, Mikey could actually feel his brother's breath against his plastron, could see every minute detail on Leo's upturned face, the features so familiar and yet somehow so foreign. He noted distantly the purpling bruises around Leo's throat and the bandage wrapped around his upper arm…two things that seemed somehow strangely out of place in this whole nightmare.

"Tell me this," Leo hissed. "If we are supposedly brothers, why did you leave me to die?"

Mikey jerked back as though he had been slapped, staring down at his brother with wide, horrified eyes. "No," he gasped in denial, shaking his head. "Never. We _never_ would have left you! This isn't real. _You're _not real!"

"Oh, I'm real," Leo replied, reaching out and placing a single hand in the center of Mikey's plastron and giving a slight push, sending the orange clad turtle rocking slightly. Mikey winced as his wrist screamed in protest, but the pain was minor compared to the throbbing ache filling his chest and climbing his throat. He had thought that nothing could ever compare to the pain he had felt upon learning that his oldest brother was dead, but this was a whole new kind of torture. It couldn't be real…it just couldn't be.

So why did it feel so real?

"You left me!" Leo continued, his voice sharp and angry. "I was trapped and you left me to die. I want to know why?!"

Mikey shook his head, a sob tearing from deep in his throat, the pain in his chest growing to the point it was becoming difficult to breathe. He needed to wake up. Right. Now.

Behind Leo something moved.

Mikey gasped as the dark form of a giant, black wolf stepped from of the shadows of the partially open doorway, moving forward to loom threateningly over his brother.

"Well, well, well" a new voice joined the conversation, dark and triumphant. "What do we have here?"

_TBC_

_I'm cruel, I know, but it was just the perfect place to end it. I will do my best to update much sooner. Until then, please review. _


	13. Chapter 13

"_Well, well, well" a new voice joined the conversation, dark and triumphant. "What do we have here?"_

Blade gasped, whirling around to face the new arrival. He cursed himself silently for becoming so distracted that he dropped his guard. Two Toes' towering form loomed over him, and his first instinct was to reach for his sword. It was only with an effort of will that he kept his hands at his sides and his expression calm as he looked up into the black wolf's sneering face.

"Come to set the prisoner free, have we?" Two Toes drawled, grinning down at Blade with a look that was anything but pleasant.

"No," Blade replied quickly. Maybe a little _too _quickly. He shifted his position, casting a quick glance behind him at the prisoner who was watching the whole exchange with a slightly dazed look on his face. "I was just talking to him…asking some questions," he explained, already knowing that he was wasting his breath. Two Toes had been waiting for an excuse to turn on him, and Blade had foolishly given him just what he wanted.

As if reading his mind, Two Toes' grin grew even wider, the evil glint in his eyes sending shivers down Blade's spine. "See now, I don't really believe you Blade," the wolf replied softly, cocking his head slightly to one side. "I think you snuck down here without permission. I think you were planning to free him." Two Toes leaned forward, his dark eyes boring into Blade like twin daggers, swirls of red reflecting from the dim light cast by the window. "I told you what would happen if you betrayed us."

Blade knew he was in trouble. Big trouble. He tried desperately to come up with some way out of this mess, but he knew it was too late. It didn't matter what he said, Two Toes would never believe him. If it had been Alpha or Viz he could have probably talked his way out, but not so with the black wolf. Two Toes had made up his mind long ago that Blade wasn't to be trusted, and nothing would convince him otherwise. And now that he had caught the turtle red handed doing something he wasn't supposed to, he had the excuse he had been looking for to take matters into his own hands.

Things were about to get very ugly.

"Viz will be disappointed that his little pet turned out to be a traitor after all, but I'm sure, given some time, he'll get over it." Without turning, Two Toes reached behind him and swung the door closed, the latch catching with a loud click that carried with it an air of finality.

Blade felt his body tense, preparing for what was to come. He didn't bother trying to go for his sword, knowing that he would never get it free from its sheath before Two Toes was on him.

True to form, the wolf lunged forward, sweeping out with outstretched claws in a blow meant to send Blade sprawling. Luckily the strike never landed as the turtle ducked low and rolled to the left, feeling the rush of air from his opponents claws mere inches above his head. He struck out with one leg as he tumbled by, the blow awkward and clumsy, but still enough to throw Two Toes off balance long enough for him to regain his feet.

They faced off once more, all form of false cheerfulness gone from Two Toes' expression, his eyes narrowed in concentration. Blade kept his body in a low crouch, readying himself to defend. He had fought Two Toes before and won, but never in such a confined space, where the wolf could use his longer reach and larger size to his advantage. There was no way Blade could match the creature in a battle of strength, which meant this fight was looking more and more likely to be short and messy.

Two Toes' lunged forward a second time, arms stretched wide in an attempt to block Blade from trying to dodge away. Using the opportunity of an open target, Blade delivered a jump kick straight into the wolf's chest, putting all the strength he could muster into the blow. The kick would have sent a normal opponent flying, but Two Toes merely stumbled back a few steps, letting out a soft grunt.

Knowing his only hope was to keep the wolf on the defensive, Blade darted forward, sending two quick punches into Two Toes' stomach, followed by a backhanded blow to the side of the wolf's face. The hits were strong enough to leave his fists bruised and aching, but the affect they had on Two Toes was disappointing to say the least. It was like using a flyswatter to attack a buffalo…all he accomplished was making his opponent mad.

Growling in rage, the wolf reached out and grabbed Blade before he could dart away. With a quick flex of muscle, Two Toes lifted him off the ground and hurled him backward through the air.

If Blade had struck the wall, the fight would have ended then and there, but luck was with him, and he flew straight into a stack of mostly empty boxes instead. The boxes cushioned his impact, but he was still left dazed, blinking up at the ceiling as cardboard rained down around him. A voice in the back of his head screamed at him to get up, and he quickly struggled to his feet, knowing the wolf would be bearing down on him any second. Unfortunately the boxes hindered his movements, causing him to stumble and trip, his mind still disoriented from his impromptu flight across the room. For a terrifying moment he had no idea which direction he was facing or where his enemy was.

"Leo! Three O'clock!'

Blade's body responded to the shout before his mind even fully registered it, diving to the left in a semi-controlled summersault to come up on his feet several feet away. It wasn't a moment too soon, either. Two Toes' claws swept through the air where Blade's head had been moments earlier, slicing several boxes into ragged strips of cardboard.

Without hesitation Blade reached behind him and drew his sword, deciding a change in tactic was long overdue. The cramped confines of the room would make maneuvering with the blade difficult, but he had to do something. He couldn't overpower Two Toes with strength alone, and he certainly wouldn't be able to keep dodging him forever. This fight wasn't some training spar…this was life or death.

"I'm going to kill you, Blade," Two Toes snarled, seeming slightly more hesitant to charge in now that Blade was carrying his sword. "I'm going to rip you into pieces."

Blade didn't bother responding, merely lifted his sword and angled his body toward his opponent, waiting for the attack he knew would be coming.

Without warning, Two Toes reached out and grabbed something from the pile of boxes, hurling it at the turtle with unexpected speed. Blade managed to sweep his sword up and out in time to deflect the object—a heavy iron wrench—but the move cost him. Two Toes came barreling in after the makeshift missile, slamming into him in a hard tackle that sent them both crashing to the floor directly in front of the chained prisoner.

All the air left Blade in a sharp gasp as the full weight of his opponent came down on top of him. He tried to bring his sword up, but Two Toes grabbed his arm before he was able to, gripping him hard directly over his bandaged wound. Blade let out a soft grunt of pain, struggling wildly to free himself, but Two Toes was simply too strong and easily held him pinned to the floor.

Two Toes flashed a triumphant grin, his sharp teeth glinting in the dim light. "It's over, boy," he growled, his hot breath washing over Blade's face. "Time to die…"

Blade flinched back as the wolf's sharp teeth dipped down toward his exposed neck, but before the jaws could rip open his throat, Two Toes' head snapped sharply to one side, the wolf letting out a startled yelp. His grip on Blade's arms momentarily loosened, and Blade responded immediately, using all his remaining strength to jerk free of his opponent's hold. Knowing he had only seconds, he lifted his sword and brought the hilt of the blade across with as much force as he could muster… straight into the side of the wolf's head.

The blow landed with perfect accuracy, and Blade felt Two Toes jerk once before suddenly going limp, his full weight sinking down onto Blade's sprawled form.

As quickly as it had begun, the fight was over.

Using what little strength he had left, Blade thrust the wolf's body up and away from him. Rolling free, he pushed himself up onto his knees even as he kept an uneasy eye on his opponents still form. The entire fight had lasted less than two minutes, but Blade was still breathing hard, his body shaking with a combination of fatigue and fading adrenaline. He was all too aware of just how close he had come to dying. And now that the battle was over, the full impact of the situation was beginning to sink in.

He had honestly just come here to talk to the prisoner, nothing more, but Two Toes' untimely arrival had ruined everything. He'd had no choice but to defend himself, but somehow he suspected that excuse wouldn't get him far with the rest of the pack. Even if he managed to talk his way out of this with Alpha, he knew Two Toes would never let it go. He doubted even a direct order from the pack leader would keep the black wolf from trying to kill him again, and that was only if Alpha didn't decide he wasn't worth the trouble and end him himself. Viz would likely do what he could to protect him, but the gray wolf was only one, and Blade doubted even his friend would be able to save him if the rest of the pack decided to turn on him.

He was well and truly screwed.

Of course, he could always run away. He could leave the pack and set out on his own. But where would he go? What would he do? How much chance of survival did he have out there in an unfriendly world all on his own? The very thought of wandering the city by himself, always looking over his shoulder, filled him with an overwhelming sense of loneliness and despair.

"Leo?"

The soft voice broke through Blade's frozen stupor, causing him to jerk slightly. He looked up at the prisoner hanging above him, finding the turtle watching him with wide, questioning eyes. He was swinging back and forth slightly in his bonds, wincing in obvious discomfort, but his gaze remained intently focused on Blade's face.

Blade could only stare back at him, his thoughts a confusing jumble. The other turtle had saved his life…not once, but twice; first when he called out a warning, and then when he had kicked Two Toes in the head, thus preventing him from tearing Blade's throat out. Blade had no idea why the prisoner had done what he had done, but he couldn't deny he owed the turtle his life.

Which left him with yet another dilemma. If he freed the prisoner, he would be well and truly sealing his fate with the wolf pack. Even Viz would likely turn on him for such a blatant act of betrayal. On the other hand, if he left the turtle behind, whether he chose to stay or leave himself, Two Toes would undoubtedly take out his wrath on the helpless prisoner. The turtle would die, and Blade would have to live with the knowledge that he had abandoned him to such a fate. It seemed a poor way to repay the prisoner for saving his life.

Closing his eyes, Blade let out a deep breath. He simply had no good course of action here, but he knew he needed to make a decision, and soon. Two Toes wouldn't stay unconscious forever…

"Leo?" The prisoner repeated a second time, his voice soft and full of concern. "Are you okay?"

At the soft question, something inside Blade snapped, and with a muttered oath he opened his eyes and pushed himself to his feet. Swiftly sheathing his sword, he headed for the door. He heard the prisoner call out to him, but he didn't turn as he yanked the door open and strode out into the hallway.

He found the guard still lying unconscious where he had left him. Quickly kneeling, Blade began searching through the man's pockets, hoping that he would find what he was looking for. Luck seemed to be with him, because in the second pocket he found what he was seeking. Pulling the small key free, Blade rose and returned to the room.

As he entered he found the prisoner struggling wildly, jerking roughly at the cuffs holding him suspended, his face a mask of pained determination as fresh trickles of blood made their way down his arms.

"Stop that," Blade ordered roughly, causing the turtle to jerk in surprise, his gaze flying to where Blade stood just inside the door.

"Leo," he gasped, his body growing limp with relief. "I thought you left."

Blade didn't bother responding. He glanced around the small room until he spotted a wooden crate that would give him the needed height to reach the prisoner's cuffs. Grabbing the crate, he dragged it over to the turtle's side, then stepped up and reached for the chains.

It felt wrong, betraying the pack like this after all they had done for him. But the turtle had saved his life as well, and Blade still had questions that needed answered.

Decision made, he thrust the key into the lock on the cuffs and turned the bolt.

* * *

Mikey felt the cuffs snap away from his wrists, and the next moment he was falling. It wasn't far, but the shock to his body was enough to send him down to his knees, pain flaring sharply along his bruised ribs and through his skull. His arms tingled and ached as blood flow was restored, causing the stinging pain in his wrists to increase ten-fold. He closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath of air, trying to steady himself.

A hand on his shoulder brought him back to the present, and he looked up into the familiar face of his oldest brother. The wave of emotions that slammed into him in that moment would have been enough to bring him to his knees if he wasn't already there.

"Think you can stand?" Leo asked, his voice softer than before, but still containing a distant note that was completely unfamiliar.

Mikey nodded, then began to struggle to his feet. Leo grabbed him beneath one arm and helped haul him upright. As soon as he was on his feet, Mikey turned and grabbed his brother, pulling him in for a tight embrace. He felt Leo stiffen beneath his hold, but at the moment he didn't particularly care.

His brother was alive!

He was still having trouble fully believing it. A small part of his mind still wondered if this wasn't just some extremely vivid dream, but if so, it was the most realistic dream he had ever experienced. Mikey felt his grip on his brother tighten as tears stung his eyes, all the pain and grief of the last several months pouring out into his embrace. "You're alive," he whispered hoarsely into Leo's neck, joy blossoming inside his chest. "I can't believe you're really alive. How…?"

Leo was standing stiffly in his embrace, making no move to return the hug, and his voice when he spoke was tight and strained. "We can talk about this later. Right now we need to get out of here before Two Toes wakes up or someone else comes along."

Mikey reluctantly released his brother and took a small step back, his gaze greedily drinking in every detail of the other turtle's form. It had been six months since he had last seen his brother. Six months of thinking Leo was dead. Six months of grieving for him and struggling to find a way to move on without him. Six months of pure hell. And now, out of the blue, Leo had returned, acting strangely but very much alive. It left Mikey reeling…joy, confusion, and pain all warring with each other inside his mind. He had so many questions he wanted to ask, but mostly he just wanted to grab Leo and never let go.

But his brother was right; they weren't safe here. He cast a quick glance down at the black wolf lying unconscious on the floor, shuddering as he remembered watching helplessly as his brother fought the creature. It had all happened so quickly, the fight brief but intense. There had been something about the battle that had convinced him that he wasn't dreaming after all, and the terror he had felt for his brother in that moment had been intense.

"Come on." With his own quick glance down at the unconscious wolf, Leo turned and headed for the door, motioning with a flick of his wrist for Mikey to follow him. The gesture wasn't really necessary as Mikey was already hot on his heels. In fact, he was walking so close to his brother that he ran into the back of Leo's shell when he paused in the doorway to glance cautiously out into the hallway. Leo gave him a slightly exasperated look over his shoulder, which Mikey returned with a small grin. There was no way he was letting his brother out of his sight anytime soon. He was too afraid that Leo might somehow disappear again. If he could have found a way to latch himself to the other turtle's belt, he would have done it.

Mikey tried to pay attention and keep alert as Leo led him through a large warehouse, but his mind was so distracted he was having a difficult time. His emotions were all over the place, adrenaline and excitement causing his limbs to shake and his heart to pound. He felt like he had been handed a giant puzzle that he had no idea how to put together. It didn't help that he was missing most of the pieces, or that he never had been any good at puzzles in the first place.

Leo hesitated only once in their journey through the warehouse, pausing at the junction of two hallways, his gaze locked down one of the pathways where Mikey could make out several closed doors leading who knew where. The look on his brother's face was one of sadness and regret, and he looked almost hesitant. Mikey was about to ask his brother what was wrong when Leo shook his head once and motioned them silently onward down the opposite hallway. His shoulders were tight as he led the way, but he never once glanced back.

Leo took them up to the roof of the warehouse, explaining softly that all the entrances on the ground floor were always guarded. They made their way to the south edge of the roof where a drainage gutter dropped down to the ground far below.

"Think you can climb down this?" Leo asked, eyeing him skeptically.

Mikey immediately nodded, wincing slightly as the movement aggravated his aching head. He was battered and sore, but it wasn't anything he hadn't dealt with before. "How about you?" he asked, nodding his head toward the bandage on his brother's arm. The white cloth showed obvious stains of dried blood, but there were a few new patches of bright crimson that revealed whatever wound was hidden beneath was bleeding once more.

Leo didn't bother answering, merely turned and swung himself out and over the edge of the roof, sliding swiftly and smoothly down the drainage pipe. Mikey waited until his brother was all the way down before following suite. As soon as he reached the ground, Leo took off once more, and Mikey hurried to follow.

They walked in silence for several long minutes, and Mikey used the time to think about everything that had happened over the last few hours. Everything felt so surreal, and he found his mind jumping back and forth between certainty that all this was real and doubt that he was somehow imagining or dreaming it all. His list of questions seemed to grow longer by the minute, but Leo remained silent, and so Mikey did the same.

It was mid-morning, and he felt slightly uncomfortable being out in the open during the daylight hours. There was a reason he and his brothers only came to the surface at night. A stray glance from an unseen observer could spell disaster. He was relieved when they finally reached a more populated area with enough buildings close to each other that they could take to the roofs. Even so, he felt exposed and vulnerable.

If Leo shared his concern, he didn't say anything, but Mikey noticed his brother was taking great care in choosing their path, keeping to the center of the roof where they would be less likely to be seen from the nearby buildings or the streets below.

It wasn't until an hour and several miles had passed that Leo eventually veered from his course, dropping them down into a shadowed…and incredibly smelly…alleyway. Mikey felt his excitement grow, his heart pounding so loudly he was surprised his brother couldn't hear it.

After checking to make sure the alley was clear, Leo turned to face him. "Okay," he stated, crossing his arms over his chest in a way that Mikey immediately recognized. "I set you free. Now you owe me some answers."

Mikey was more than ready for some answers himself. He saw Leo open his mouth, but before his brother could speak, Mikey blurted out the question that had been plaguing him the most since leaving the warehouse. "Leo, do you know who I am?"

Leo frowned, obviously not pleased at being interrupted. He closed his mouth into a tight line, regarding Mikey for a few long moments before giving his head a single, tight shake.

Even half-way expecting it, Mikey felt his heart sink. He swallowed hard, ignoring the pain and disappointment his brother's answer brought as he asked his next question. "Do you know who _you_ are?"

Again Leo merely stared at him for several long seconds before finally giving a non-committal shrug of his shoulders.

It was enough of an answer for Mikey, and though the news was certainly upsetting, it also helped to explain his brother's strange behavior. "Shell, Leo," he whispered, taking a step forward and lifting his hand toward his brother. "What happened to you?"

Leo recoiled from his hand as though it were a snake, taking several steps back to put distance between them, his expression hardening into a tight mask. "Why don't _you_ tell _me_," he snapped, his hands clenching into tight fists at his side.

Mikey frowned in confusion at his brother's harsh response. This was all so messed up. Leo was alive, but he didn't remember who he was or who his family was. That knowledge brought a whole different kind of pain, but Mikey did his best to shake it off. His brother was alive and that was all that mattered. Everything else could be figured out.

"Well?" Leo demanded, his voice impatient. "Tell me! Why did you leave me to die?"

Mikey slowly shook his head, remembering his brother's angry accusations back at the warehouse. "Leo," he replied softly, "I don't know what you think happened that night, but you're wrong. We never would have left you! You're our brother!"

Leo let out an angry snort. "Don't lie to me," he snapped. "Viz told me what happened. There was an explosion and I was trapped. You couldn't get me free so you just left…left me to drown. If Viz and Two Toes hadn't rescued me I would be dead right now!"

Mikey stared at his brother with wide eyes, his head shaking silently from side to side in mute denial. There had to be some kind of mistake. What his brother was saying couldn't possibly be true. Whoever this Viz was had to have been lying to his brother. "Leo…" he started, but his brother cut him off viciously.

"Just tell me the truth! Tell me what happened!"

Mikey took an involuntary step back at the fire in his brother's voice. He stared at Leo's face sadly, wondering how long he had been carrying this bitterness and anger around with him. Mikey wished desperately that he knew what to say to help his brother, but…

"I can't," he admitted softly, dropping his gaze from Leo's angry face. "I don't remember."

"Don't remember?" Leo scoffed, his voice laden with scorn. "Well, that's convenient."

Mikey shook his head. "It's not convenient, it's the truth," he replied quickly, turning his head and lifting his hand to the raised scar he could just feel at the back of his skull. "See this? It's where a rock hit me in the back of the head during the explosion. It knocked me out for two full days. I guess there was some bleeding in my brain and Donnie had to drill a hole to relieve the pressure." He dropped his hand, turning back to face Leo. "I almost died," he finished quietly. "When I woke up, I'd lost a whole week. I don't remember anything of what happened that night. Nothing. I swear it's the truth."

It obviously wasn't the answer Leo had been expecting. He studied Mikey silently for several long moments, a slight frown on his face, obviously trying to decide if he was telling the truth or not. "If what you say is true," he finally questioned, his tone doubtful, "then how do you know I'm wrong about what happened?"

Mikey sighed, uncertain for a moment how he should answer. The only information he had about what had transpired that night had come from Raphael, and it obviously hadn't been the truth. Raph had told him Leo had been killed instantly by the explosion, crushed beneath the rock. Mikey had no idea why Raph would have lied to him—something he intended to find out just as soon as he saw his brother again—but he knew whatever Raph's reasoning, there was no way that he, or Donnie for that matter, would have just abandoned Leo as his big brother was suggesting. It just wasn't even feasible. But how did he get Leo to understand that when he didn't even remember them?

"Look, Leo," he finally answered, making his tone as firm and confident as he could. "I may not remember what happened that night, but I do know Raph and Donnie, and they never would have abandoned you like that. Never! You're our brother—our big brother—and we love you. When we thought you were dead…" he hesitated, the pain still all too fresh, "…it nearly destroyed us," he finished softly.

Leo stared at him intently, and Mikey knew his brother was once again trying to decide if he could believe him. A myriad of emotions flashed across his face, too many for Mikey to even begin to try and interpret them all. His brother looked so lost and confused that Mikey felt the overwhelming urge to reach out and pull him into a hug. With effort he refrained, knowing Leo needed a little time to process everything he'd just heard.

"I'm Mikey, by the way," Mikey spoke into the sudden silence, offering his brother a small smile. "I'm not sure how on earth you could have forgotten about _me_, but I promise you, I _will_ find a way to remedy that."

The barest hint of a smile flashed across Leo's face, there and gone again so quickly that Mikey may have only imagined it. "Alright, _Mikey_," his brother replied, putting a slight emphasis on the name, as though testing it out. "Let's say I believe you for now. What happens next?"

The question took Mikey by surprise, maybe because he was so used to Leo leading and the rest of them following. He had to remind himself that Leo wasn't exactly himself at the moment.

"We go home," he replied easily, smiling slightly as he pictured his family's reaction when they waltzed into the lair.

Leo frowned, looking suddenly uncertain. "I'm not sure…"

"Don't you want to know what happened?" Mikey quickly interrupted. "Raph and Donnie can explain everything, and Master Splinter might be able to help with your memory loss." That last was a bit of a stretch, but Mikey didn't care…he needed Leo home. It wouldn't fix everything, but it would certainly be a start.

Leo's frown deepened. "Master Splinter?" he questioned, cocking his head to one side.

Mikey smiled, covering the deep sadness that filled him at the fact that Leo really didn't remember them. "He's our father," he supplied lightly. "He's a giant rat. He's also the one who taught us Ninjitsu."

Leo's eyes grew comically round with surprise, and Mikey found himself laughing despite how messed up the whole situation was. He marveled once again that his brother was alive. He hadn't known it was possible to feel so heartbroken and yet so joyful at the same time.

"I know it's a lot to take in," he encouraged, reaching out and letting his hand fall on Leo's shoulder, needing the contact with his brother. Leo flinched slightly, but didn't pull away. "I can explain more on our way home if you'd like. I've got some questions of my own, too. Like how you came to be in a warehouse full of mutant wolves? Or why that black one was so intent on ripping out your spleen?"

Mikey tried to steer his brother toward the fire escape that would lead them back up to the rooftops, but Leo resisted, looking hesitant once more.

"Come on, Leo," Mikey urged. "Where else would you go? Back to the warehouse to let that wolf finish what he started?"

Leo shook his head, one of his hands absently rising to rest over his bandaged arm. Mikey caught the inadvertent gesture and found his eyes narrowing as a sudden thought occurred to him. He released Leo's shoulder and turned to face his brother directly.

"Did the wolf do that to you?" he asked softly, his eyes skipping back and forth between the bandage on his brother's arm and the heavy bruising around his throat.

Leo looked startled by the question before quickly looking away, shrugging his shoulders dismissively but not denying it.

Mikey had to fight to remain still as sudden fire burst through his veins. He wasn't a turtle given to easy fits of anger—that was Raph's role—but the thought of his brother being alive all these long months, forced to live with a bunch of mutated wolves who obviously abused him, infuriated him. He suddenly wished he had taken the opportunity to put in a few well aimed kicks to the black wolf before they had left the room. If he ever ran into the creature again, he would make sure he paid for what he had done to his brother.

"Why?" The question broke from Mikey's lips before he could stop it. "Why did you stay with them, Leo?"

Leo turned back to face him, his expression unreadable. "They saved my life," he answered simply, shrugging his shoulders once more. "And it's not like I had anywhere else to go."

The answer hurt more than it should have. Mikey knew what had happened to Leo wasn't his fault. If he had known his brother was still alive he would have gone to get him immediately. Still, he couldn't help but feel guilty for it all. Maybe he _should_ have known. Maybe he should have questioned Raph's story from the start. Maybe he should have demanded to see proof that his brother really was dead. At the time, the thought had been so terribly horrifying that Mikey hadn't even been able to consider it, but maybe if he had, they would have figured out Leo was alive a lot sooner.

Dropping his gaze to the ground, Mikey breathed out a deep and weary sigh. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't go back and change the past. What was done was done, and now he just needed to figure out what he could do to help fix the damage. He was convinced the first step was to get his brother home where they could all talk and figure out exactly what had happened. He found that he needed the answers just as desperately as Leo did.

"Please," he whispered, raising his gaze to meet his brother's eyes once more. "Please come home with me, Leo. I promise we'll figure this all out…"

Leo studied him for a long moment, his expression remaining uncertain, but finally he gave in with a small sigh and a nod. "Alright, lead the way."

TBC..

_Hope you liked the chapter. I was originally planning to give you a bit more, but I've been so busy I didn't want to make you all wait another week for an update. I hope you liked the reunion between Mikey and Leo. Much more to come as Leo heads "home." _

_Thanks for sticking with this story, and thanks for all the lovely comments. You guys mean the world to me!_


	14. Chapter 14

_Wow guys! The response to last chapter completely floored me! I am so incredibly grateful for all of you reading this, and especially to those who leave me feedback. It is all of you who make writing so much fun, so THANK YOU! Hope you enjoy…_

* * *

Viz stood atop the roof of the warehouse, staring out toward the distant city, doing his best to ignore the heated argument taking place behind him. Not an easy task considering Two Toes was all but shouting. The black wolf was furious, the blow he had taken to the side of his head having done nothing to improve his temperament. He was demanding that the wolf pack set out immediately to track down Blade and the escaped prisoner. He was hungry for revenge, his anger blinding him to anything but the need to hunt down the one who had so damaged his pride.

Luckily, Alpha was not so blinded. As angry as the pack leader had been when he learned of Blade's betrayal and the prisoner's escape, his first priority remained the safety of the pack. He would do nothing to jeopardize that. It was an aspect of Alpha that Viz had come to respect. His friend might sometimes allow his emotions to drive his actions, but never when it came to the safety of his men…or, in this case, his pack.

Viz listened as Alpha explained to the irate Two Toes yet again that they would have to wait until the cover of darkness before they began their hunt. Moving around in the daylight was simply too risky. The chances of being seen too high. Two small turtles could manage it much easier than giant wolves. Alpha would not risk bringing unwanted attention to their existence if he could at all avoid it.

It was an answer that Two Toes was having a difficult time accepting. He argued that by the time night fell, the turtle's scents would be much more difficult to find, buried beneath the varied smells of the city. It was a valid argument, but Alpha remained firm, and eventually Two Toes gave in with a harsh curse, muttering in graphic detail exactly what he would do to Blade when he finally caught up to him. A moment later the trap door down into the warehouse slammed shut, signifying the black wolf's retreat below.

Viz let out a soft sigh, making a mental note to keep an eye on Two Toes throughout the day. He wouldn't put it past the hot-blooded wolf to disobey Alpha's orders and try to sneak out to hunt the turtles on his own, despite the risks.

Apparently Alpha shared his concern.

"Keep an eye on him today, won't you," the pack leader muttered as he came to stand next to Viz at the edge of the roof.

"Already planned on it," Viz replied quietly, his gaze never leaving the distant horizon.

Alpha let out a deep sigh, reaching out to grip the edge of the roof in tight fists, his claws digging soft grooves into the rough mortar. "I feared this day would come," he muttered, the frustration in his voice evident. "I never should have trusted that damn turtle. He was never one of us!"

Viz turned his head to regard his friend, noting the harsh lines of anger that drew Alpha's lips up in a slight snarl.

"Perhaps because we never allowed him to become one of us," he replied softly, thinking of Two Toes and Talon's attack on the turtle as well as Alpha's own harsh treatment of the young mutant. He had seen Blade working hard to earn the right to be considered one of the pack, but nothing he had done had ever been enough.

With a harsh snort, Alpha turned to face him. "You defend him still?" he demanded, his eyes flashing with indignation. "After what he did? After he betrayed us!?"

"I do not defend his actions," Viz quickly denied, shaking his head. "But I do think I understand them."

It hadn't taken him long after Alpha had woken him with the news that Blade and the prisoner were gone to piece together what had likely transpired. He had known that Blade had been itching for a chance to speak with the captive turtle, but he had underestimated just how far his young friend would go to accomplish it. After hearing Two Toes' version of the story, Viz was pretty sure he had a fairly good idea what had happened after Blade had snuck from their room. The turtle would have gone to the prisoner to ask his questions, Two Toes would have arrived and assumed the worst, the two would have fought, and after the battle was over, Blade would have assumed that his only option was to run away. Why he had freed the prisoner Viz wasn't entirely sure, but he could guess at those reasons as well.

Even knowing what had likely transpired, the gray wolf couldn't deny that a part of him felt betrayed. Why hadn't Blade come to him and told him what had happened? Had the turtle not trusted him? Or had Blade been so intent on getting his answers that he hadn't spared a second thought for the wolf that had saved him and nursed him back to health?

"I can understand the attachment you feel toward him," Alpha stated, regarding Viz through narrowed eyes. "After all the work you put into saving him… But the truth is, he has aligned himself with the others of his kind now, which makes him an enemy. I trust you understand what that means?"

"I understand," Viz answered softly, returning his gaze to the distant city. He could feel Alpha's eyes resting heavy on him, but he said no more and eventually the pack leader turned away.

"Be ready to lead the search tonight," Alpha stated, his voice taking on the authoritative tone of a leader. "You have the best nose in the pack. Once you locate the turtles, capture them if you can and bring them back here. I still have questions I want answered. If capture is not an option…you know what must be done."

Viz felt his jaw clench, but nodded once to show his understanding. He listened as Alpha turned and headed toward the trap door leading down into the warehouse. Just before he reached it, the tawny wolf paused, turning back to face Viz once more.

"We are at war," Alpha stated softly. "A war for our very survival. You know as well as I do that sometimes in war you have to do things that aren't very…pleasant. I've always counted on you before…can I count on you with this?"

Turning slightly, Viz regarded his friend evenly. "Always," he murmured softly, his voice soft but full of promise.

Alpha gave him a single nod before turning and disappearing back down the trap door.

Turning back to his quiet vigil, Viz raised his snout to the sky, breathing in a deep lung-full of air. There was a hint of moisture to the air, barely perceptible but definitely present. He had sensed it the moment he had reached the roof, though he doubted any of the others had taken notice. His instincts told him there would be a storm later today, and given the current temperature and time of year, it was likely to be a big one. If he was right, strong winds and heavy rains would almost certainly obliterate any scent trail left by the turtles. By the time evening came, tracking them would become all but impossible.

Tonight at least, Blade would be safe.

After that…?

Viz let out a soft sigh. He could only hope that he would never see the young turtle again, because if he did he would have no choice but to carry out Alpha's orders. His loyalty was first and foremost to his pack...it couldn't be any other way.

Feeling heavier than he had in a very long time, Viz turned and left the roof.

* * *

Hun was not happy.

In his time leading the Purple Dragons, he'd had his fair share of rival gangs threatening to encroach on his territory. Especially in the beginning, when the Dragons had yet to make a name for themselves. But none of those gangs existed anymore, having been obliterated by Hun and his followers long ago, and no new rivals had dared to step up and issue a challenge in quite some time.

Until now.

Hun watched as a heavy plume of smoke drifted up from the charred remains of the warehouse. Firefighters had been struggling for several hours to contain the blaze, and though no other buildings had been damaged, the warehouse was a complete loss.

Situated deep in Dragon territory, Hun had honestly had his eye on the warehouse for quite some time. The only thing that had stopped him from making a hit on the building long before now was the fairly decent security system the owner had in place. Hun had chosen, for the time being, to bypass it in favor of the easier targets littered throughout his large and lucrative domain.

But now someone else had hit the warehouse, and they hadn't just robbed it, they had obliterated it. When the warehouse guards had been found bound and gagged, the authorities had immediately jumped on the Purple Dragons as the likely perpetrators, something which both irritated and pleased Hun in equal parts. But when a few punk kids had been found and arrested near the scene who had ties to the newly formed Wolf Gang, speculation had run rampant. Now Hun was much more than just irritated…he was furious.

The only thing worse than another gang making a hit on his territory, was another gang making a hit on his territory _and_ receiving credit for it. The news would spread, and other gangs would start to think the Purple Dragons were weak, that they couldn't hold onto their territory. In the weeks ahead there would be other challenges, other infringements. The Dragons would have to remain on high alert. Their borders would need to be constantly guarded, putting a halt to all other gang activities, at least for the time being.

It was bad enough having to deal with those damn turtle freaks always butting their noses into things and ruining his plans, but now this…?

No, Hun was definitely not happy.

Turning away from the flaming ruins before him, he took out his phone and quickly punched in a number. As soon as the line was picked up on the other end he began to bark out orders. "Contact all the others. Let them know we have an emergency meeting tonight at the mill. Five o'clock." He snapped the phone shut without waiting for an answer, striding toward where he had left his car.

For now the Dragons would work on damage control. But soon, very soon, they would take the fight to their enemies. If the Wolf Gang wanted a war, the Dragons would give them a war!

* * *

Blade was a coward.

There was no other explanation as to why, with every step he took toward this unknown "home", he found his pulse pounding faster and sweat beading on the back of his neck. A sick twisting sensation had set up residence deep in his gut, and he was pretty sure his hands were shaking. It was a disgusting display of weakness, but try as he might he couldn't seem to control his body's reaction to his rising fear and tension.

Mikey walked along beside him, and if he was aware of Blade's state of near panic, he didn't say anything. At first the orange turtle had barraged him with questions, but after receiving only grunts and short, one-word answers from Blade, he had finally taken the hint and fallen silent.

It wasn't that Blade was trying to be rude, he simply had too much on his mind. He was fighting an internal battle between the part of his brain that told him he was doing the right thing and the part that called him fifty kinds of stupid for walking willingly into what could very possibly turn out to be enemy territory.

The truth was, he didn't know anything about these other turtles. Mikey claimed they were brothers and that they never would have purposefully abandoned him, but Blade was having a hard time buying that story. He didn't believe Viz would have lied to him And if the turtles hadn't abandoned him, how had he ended up with the wolf pack? The pieces just didn't seem to fit.

So why was he doing this?

If he was honest with himself, Blade would have to admit that he _wanted_ to believe Mikey. He wanted to believe that he had a family out there that truly cared about him and would welcome him home. He wanted to believe that everything that had happened was just the result of some big misunderstanding. He wanted to believe there was a way to recover his lost memories and regain the life he had lost. Mikey's reaction to him, while at first startling, had filled him with an undeniable warmth and longing. There was something about the orange turtle that made him feel comfortable and at ease with the other despite not really knowing anything about him. He wasn't sure why, but he trusted Mikey.

But what if his emotions were leading him astray? Was it possible that he was allowing his own desires to cloud his judgement? What if he met these other turtles only to learn that they did not welcome him with quite the same enthusiasm as their brother? What if he wasn't welcomed back at all? What if this unknown life he was walking toward ended up being nothing but a disappointment? He had betrayed the wolf pack and given up everything he had for a chance to find out, but now that the time was approaching, he found himself growing more and more tense and uncertain.

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he was taken slightly by surprise when Mikey led them down from the rooftops and to a manhole cover hidden deep in an alley. He supposed he should have expected it considering where Viz had found him, but he couldn't deny that he was a little taken aback with the knowledge that the turtles lived down in the sewers.

Mikey dropped down the hole first, and after a brief hesitation, Blade followed suit.

As soon as they were safely underground it was as though the lock on Mikey's mouth broke open, and the orange turtle once again began to speak. He didn't ask Blade any more questions, but instead began talking about his home and family. The conversation was one sided, with Mikey doing all the talking and Blade merely listening, but Blade didn't mind this in the least. He drank in every word, listening intently as Mikey chattered away, hoping desperately that something the other might say would somehow trigger his memories. No such luck, but the steady dialogue _did _help distract him from his conflicted thoughts, which was probably the other turtle's intention all along.

They had been walking for quite some time when Mikey suddenly pulled to a stop, cutting off what he was saying in mid-sentence, causing Blade to stumble to a halt right next to him. He turned his head to find Mikey staring at him, his eyes shining softly in the dim light of the tunnel.

"Are you sure you don't remember anything?" Mikey asked suddenly, his blue eyes boring into Blade with an unexpected intensity.

Blade arched an eyebrow at the abrupt change in conversation. "I'm sure," he replied simply. "Why?"

Mikey shrugged, his intense gaze still locked on Blade. "You've taken the last three turns without me directing you at all," he replied softly. "Like you know exactly where we're going."

Startled, Blade considered Mikey's statement. As much as he wanted to get excited about the possibilities it presented, he knew it likely didn't mean as much as the other turtle hoped it did. "My body seems to remember all sorts of things my mind doesn't," he told Mikey evenly. "It doesn't mean anything."

Mikey frowned at that answer, shaking his head. "Of course it means something," he argued. "It means the information is still in there somewhere, you just can't reach it right now."

Blade stared at Mikey, taken slightly aback by the other turtle's easy assessment. Could it really be that simple?

"I guess," he finally stated, his voice uncertain.

Mikey gave him a big grin. "We just need to figure out how to make your neural transmitters connect along the proper symnaptic path to trigger your memorial reflexes."

Blade blinked, staring at the orange turtle in confusion. "What?" he asked dumbly.

Mikey's grin grew even wider, his eyes sparkling with a mischievous light. "I don't know. I was just trying to sound like Donnie," he replied easily. "He's the genius in the family. He's always using big words and complicated phrases that no one understands. There was this one time…" and just like that Mikey launched back into his dialogue, turning to lead the way down the tunnel once more.

Feeling slightly bemused, Blade followed, listing to the other turtle while simultaneously trying to pay more attention to the path in front of him. Mikey was right, his body seemed to automatically know which way to take through the labyrinth of tunnels and passageways without being directed. He wasn't sure exactly what that meant, but maybe Mikey was right…maybe the information was all still there, locked away in his mind, waiting for him to find the key. After so long telling himself to just forget his past and move on, the hope in that thought was almost too much.

After a while, the tunnel they were traveling down ended abruptly in a wide shaft dropping down ten feet or so to a second tunnel below. A row of iron rungs bolted to the side of the tunnel provided the way down, and Mikey swung himself onto the top one without hesitation. "We're almost home," he announced, the excitement in his voice unmistakable. "Just down one more level and a few tunnels over. Just wait until the guys see you. They're going to totally flip out!" He flashed Blade a quick grin before beginning to climb down the makeshift ladder.

Blade stared after him, his stomach churning. For the last hour he had managed to forget, or at least ignore, his fear, but now it returned, gnawing away at his insides like a trapped beast. He suddenly wasn't feeling very well, the nausea in his stomach making him feel dangerously close to throwing up. Every muscle in his body was tensed, his skin feeling suddenly too hot and dry. His heart was pounding wildly inside his chest, and he couldn't seem to draw in enough air.

'_Panic attack,' _his brain supplied distantly. He'd never had one before, or at least, not that he knew of.

It was strange. He had navigated high tech security systems, taken out armed security guards, and faced down a giant, mutated wolf intent on tearing his throat out, all without the gut-wrenching fear that assaulted him now with the simple thought of going down that ladder and facing the unknown. He tried to fight the fear back down, but it was like he was no longer in control of his body and he found himself taking an involuntary step backward.

He couldn't do this. Not here…not now. Everything had happened too fast, and he wasn't prepared. He wasn't ready!

* * *

Mikey stepped gingerly from the final rung of the ladder, dropping the last few feet down to the tunnel floor. He winced slightly on landing, his ribs giving a sharp twinge of protest. He ached all over and was pretty sure he looked as bad as he felt, with dried blood caking the side of his head and his arms. He could only imagine what his brothers' reactions would be when he walked into the lair.

Then again, considering who he was bringing home with him, they might not even notice him. Which was just fine by Mikey.

Unable to keep the stupid grin from his face, he craned his neck back to peer up the shaft, expecting to see Leo making his way down the ladder behind him. But the rungs were empty.

"Leo?" Mikey called, his voice echoing eerily up the narrow walls of the shaft. "It's safe to come down now."

There was no answer, and Mikey felt the smile slip from his face. "Leo," he called again, this time louder, peering intently upward and hoping that his brother's face would appear above him any second. But the shaft remained empty, the echoing silence of the sewers seeming to taunt him.

Frowning in concern, Mikey grabbed hold of the lowest rung and began to scurry as quickly as he could back up the ladder. His heart began to pound faster in his chest, and it had nothing to do with the physical effort of climbing. Why wasn't his brother answering him?

His head popped over the edge of the shaft wall, his eyes widening in alarm at what he saw. Or more specifically, what he _didn't_ see.

Leo was gone.

Swearing hard enough to make even Raph blush, he pushed himself up and over the lip of the tunnel, jumping to his feet and scanning his surroundings desperately. There were a couple of branching tunnels not far down the path, and he raced to the nearest one, peering down its dim corridor. There was no sign of his brother.

"Leo!" Mikey screamed, his voice carrying a hint of the panic that was beginning to grip him. How could his brother have just disappeared? Where would Leo have gone? And why?

He cast around desperately, hoping to find a footprint or a scratch on the wall, anything that might indicate which way his brother had gone, but there was nothing. Even with his brains scrambled, Leo was still a ninja, and moving around undetected in the tunnels had been one of the first lessons Sensei had ever taught them.

Continuing to call his brother's name, Mikey surged down the passageway, pausing at each branching tunnel, his eyes frantically searching the dim corridors. With each passing minute and empty tunnel he found himself growing more and more desperate. It seemed impossible that Leo could have vanished so quickly and with absolutely no trace. It was almost as though his brother had never even been there, a thought that left Mikey more than a little breathless with barely suppressed panic.

Pausing at the intersection of four tunnels, he found himself slumping back against the wall, fighting against the weight of despair that threatened to crush him. There were literally thousands of branching tunnels and passageways beneath the city, and he had absolutely no idea which ones he should search. For all he knew, he could be heading in completely the wrong direction. His brother could be miles away by now.

"Leo, please," he whispered into the silence that surrounded him, finding it hard to believe that only minutes ago he had been filled with so much joy and anticipation. How had things gone so wrong so fast? They had been so close to home. Why had Leo run? He had known his brother was nervous, but he honestly hadn't expected Leo to bolt. His brother _never_ ran from anything.

But then again, Leo wasn't really Leo right now.

The distant echo of dripping water echoed around him, mocking him with the futility of his search. A sudden thought struck him, and Mikey straightened in newfound determination. "The guys," he muttered, his voice echoing softly back at him from the tunnel walls. "The guys can help." Three sets of eyes were definitely better than one, and maybe Raph or Donnie could pick up on something Mikey had missed.

He stood for a moment, torn between the desire to go for help and reluctance to give up on his search. Leo could be getting further and further away by the minute, and the thought of losing his brother again was more than terrifying. But the truth was, if Leo decided he didn't want to be found, then Mikey wouldn't find him. No matter how long or hard he searched.

It was a hard truth to accept, and Mikey found himself fighting against the harsh sting of tears. Living without Leo these past six months had been pure agony. Now that he knew his brother was alive there was no way he was going to go back to that. He _would_ find his brother again, no matter how long it took. He made a silent oath to himself that he wouldn't eat, sleep, or rest until Leo was back home where he belonged!

With newfound resolve, he pushed himself away from the wall and quickly ducked down the passageway that would lead toward home. He was almost back to the shaft when a sudden tingling along his spine had him pausing. He slowly turned, his gaze carefully sweeping the length of tunnel he was currently standing in. It was completely empty, but still Mikey couldn't shake the sense that he was no longer alone. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and forcing his mind and thoughts into calmness. It was a pre-battle ninja trick that had taken him many years to master, but right now he knew he needed it to refrain from racing down the tunnels in the same desperate search that had already yielded him nothing.

"Leo," he called, his voice tuned just loud enough to carry down the tunnel. "Are you there?"

Just as before there was no answer.

Swallowing down his disappointment, Mikey turned to resume his journey home, but suddenly paused once more, turning back to face behind him.

"I don't know if you can hear me, Leo," he called, fighting to keep his voice calm and steady past the steady ache that had taken up residence in his chest, "but if you can, I want you to know that it's okay. Everything's going to be okay. I don't know how yet, but I promise you that we will find a way to fix this. We've been through some pretty tough times before, but we've always gotten through it. As a family. We just need you to come home. _I _need you to come home. I miss my big brother." This last came out barely more than a whisper, and Mikey had to clear his throat of the sudden lump that had formed there.

Memories flooded through his mind…memories of all the times he had needed Leo and his big brother had been there. There were too many to count, and yet Mikey remembered them all. Right now, he needed Leo more than he could ever remember needing him before, but for the first time, his brother was nowhere to be found.

Several long minutes passed before Mikey could no longer bear the silence. Turning dejectedly, he made his way back down the tunnel toward the shaft.

It was time to go home.

* * *

Donnie stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, watching as the cold water he had splashed on his face moments earlier dripped down his green skin in tiny rivulets that tumbled from his chin and down into the sink below. He knew he looked a mess, his skin a paler shade of green than usual, the sickly color accented by the heavy bruising under his eyes from yet another sleepless night. Yet despite his obvious physical exhaustion there was a light in the depths of his brown eyes that shone brightly with hope and excitement.

Today he was going to find his brothers. _Both_ his brothers.

The very thought had his stomach twisting in nervous anticipation. The thought of seeing Leo again...not just for a brief moment, but actually talking to him, touching him...sent his heart racing and his breath quickening. The longing that filled him at the thought was almost scary in its intensity. It was no wonder that he hadn't been able to sleep after leaving Raph's room. He was far too wound up, excitement and anticipation flowing through him like a hefty dose of adrenaline, drowning out any hint of lingering doubt and hesitation.

During the past hours he'd had a lot of time to think about things, and though he still couldn't come up with a good explanation as to _how_ his brother was still alive, he was still absolutely convince that it was the truth. He knew Raph thought he was just being delusional, and yet for reasons he couldn't really explain, Donnie had never felt more certain of anything in his entire life. Leo _was_ alive, and Donnie was going to find him and bring him home.

But first, they needed to rescue Mikey.

His reflection frowned at him as worry and concern for his little brother surfaced yet again, putting a slight damper to his excitement over Leo. It was a pattern he had become all too familiar with in the last several hours, his emotions teeter tottering between elation over Leo and worry over Mikey. He could only pray and hope that they would find their little brother quickly, and that he would be unharmed. It was hard to even think about any other alternative. He knew one thing, though—those who had taken his brother would come to regret it.

With a small shake of his head, Donnie turned and exited the bathroom, flipping the light off behind him. The smell of coffee hit him as soon as he stepped into the hall, bringing forth of moan of longing he had no control over. Ignoring the stairs, he leapt agilely over the banister at the end of the hall, landing lightly on his feet in the open room below.

He glanced over toward the kitchen, unsurprised to find Raph slumped wearily in his usual chair, a mug of coffee cradled in one hand.

Making a beeline for the half-empty pot, Donnie spared a quick glance toward his brother, noting that Raph looked just as exhausted and worn as he did. The scrapes and bruises were still there on display for all to see, but it was the defeated droop of his brother's shoulders that concerned Donnie the most.

Pouring himself a cup of steaming black ambrosia and taking it with him to the table, Donnie slumped down in the chair opposite Raph, regarding his brother worriedly over the rim of his cup.

"You okay?" he asked softly.

Raph replied with a grunt and a half shrug, not bothering to look up from his own cup.

Donnie let out a soft sigh, saddened that Raph couldn't share in the hope and excitement that bolstered him through his own fear and exhaustion. At the same time, he fully understood his brother's reluctance to believe. It wasn't that Raph didn't _want _to believe, more that he was _afraid _ to believe. Raphael had always had a hard time processing his emotions, and something this big?—It had the potential of destroying his brother in ways Donnie didn't even want to think about. For Donnie, it was already too late. Hope had already taken too strong a hold, but at the same time he couldn't blame Raph for trying to protect himself against more pain and disappointment.

Silence descended over the kitchen once more as both brothers turned their full attention to their mugs of coffee. It was strange, sitting at the table without the background noise of whatever show Mikey was currently caught up in echoing in from the living room. The quiet was unnerving, reminding Donnie of those first few really bad months after Leo's absence, when Mikey had spent much of his time hidden away in his room.

He'd never thought he would actually _miss_ the noise, but he did, just as he had back then. The silence was a glaring reminder of Mikey's absence, and only served to heighten his worry. He stared at the clock on the kitchen wall, urging it to go faster. He knew it was foolish to go up top during the day, but that didn't keep a large part of him from wanting to do it anyway. Every minute they sat here doing nothing was akin to pure torture.

"Is Master Splinter still sleeping?" he finally asked, more to break the heavy silence than anything else.

Raph glanced up at him, giving his head a single nod. "Yeah. He looked pretty rough last night."

Donnie sighed, turning the warm mug around in his hand and staring down into the dark liquid swirling within. "I know," he replied softly. "But he'll be better once we get Mikey back." _And Leo_, he added silently to himself.

Glancing once more up at the clock, Donnie drained his coffee mug and rose, heading back to the coffee pot to drain the last bit of liquid into his cup. "Want me to make more?" he asked, regarding his worn looking brother over his shoulder. Raph certainly looked like he could use three or four more cups.

Raph gave a small shake of his head. "Nah," he muttered, pushing himself to his feet and draining the last of his own cup in a single, large gulp. "I'm heading into the dojo for a bit."

With a regretful sigh, Donnie flipped the coffeemaker off and began walking toward the lab. "Just take it easy," he called out to his brother. "If you rip any of those stitches, April is going to…"

The rest of what he was going to say died in his throat as the door to the lair gave the low, grating rumble that indicated the hidden latch on the other side had been released. Across the room Raph also froze in his trek to the dojo, his eyes flickering quickly to Donnie, the unspoken question evident in his gaze.

Donnie gave his head a small shake, letting his brother know that he was not expecting anyone. He knew it was possible that Casey or April had decided to come down for a visit, but it seemed unlikely. Their human friends almost always called before coming to the lair.

Body tense, Donnie watched as the door slowly slid back, the deep shadows on the other side shifting forward to reveal…

"Mikey!" The word was a twin gasp torn from two throats.

Standing in the doorway, looking bruised and battered and utterly worn, was none other than their lost little brother.

TBC

_Don't worry, I am not dragging this out for no reason. There is a plan, and the reunion is coming VERY soon. I just needed to set a few things up, so I hope you will stick with me and bear through to the end._


	15. Chapter 15

_Well, I realize that I made some of you upset with me over the last chapter. I do apologize, but the scenes in this chapter were some that I have had buried in my mind from the very start of this fic, and it took some set-up to get here. I can only hope that I managed to portray them as clearly as I saw them in my own head. I have quickly learned that angst is not all that easy for me to write (even though I love it!) Thank you so much, Americanpyscho, for your thoughts and suggestions on portions of this chapter. It was so very helpful. For those of you who love good, angsty stories, you need to check out her page! She has several awesome WIP that will leave you begging for more!_

_I hope you all enjoy!_

* * *

_A half hour earlier…_

Blade crouched in the dark tunnel, his head tucked low between his knees as he fought off a wave of dizziness and the corresponding urge to be violently and messily sick. His breathing was coming in harsh little pants that he struggled to keep as silent as possible. Mikey was close, searching for him, and Blade didn't want to inadvertently give away his position to the other turtle.

He was ashamed of his cowardice. Ashamed of the fear that had driven him to hide away down one of the dark tunnels not far from the shaft. He wasn't sure exactly what he was doing, he just knew he couldn't waltz his way into a home he no longer knew to meet a family he no longer remembered. Not yet, anyway. Not until he'd had a chance to at least process all that had happened in the last several hours.

And so he kept hidden, feeling more and more ill as he listened to Mikey calling out to him, the desperation in the other turtle's tone unmistakable. At one point Mikey came dangerously close to his hiding place, but there were so many different branching pathways that at the last moment he veered away. Blade was relieved. He was feeling far too sick to try to make a run for it, not to mention that he was afraid of getting lost in the dark labyrinth beneath the city. He had no way of knowing just how far that innate sense of direction Mikey had noticed earlier would actually take him, and he would rather not test its boundaries.

Eventually Mikey's frantic calls fell silent, and after several long minutes had passed without hearing anything, Blade risked a quick glance around the corner into the tunnel that led down to the shaft. He quickly jerked back when he spotted the back of Mikey's shell moving slowly away down the passageway. He knew he hadn't made a sound, but something must have given him away because a moment later he heard Mikey's quiet voice drift to him from down the tunnel_._

"Leo, are you there?"

Blade pressed back against the tunnel wall, closing his eyes and fighting to keep his breathing slow and even. A long moment of silence passed, then Mikey's voice sound again, soft and hesitant.

"I don't know if you can hear me, Leo, but if you can, I want you to know that it's okay. Everything's going to be okay. I don't know how yet, but I promise you that we will find a way to fix this. We've been through some pretty tough times before, but we've always gotten through it. As a family. We just need you to come home." There was a small hesitation before Mikey finished in a voice so soft Blade had to strain to hear it. "_I_ need you to come home. I miss my big brother."

Blade felt his breath catch in his throat at the deep sadness he could clearly detect in the other turtle's tone. A small voice in the back of his mind screamed at him to get up and go to Mikey, and before he realized what he was doing, he was struggling to his feet. Unfortunately his body was not prepared for the sudden change in elevation, and his earlier dizziness returned with a vengeance, forcing him to reach out and lean heavily against the wall to keep from falling flat on his face. He cursed silently, wondering what kind of rotten luck had him getting sick _now._

It took a couple of minutes to clear his head and pull himself together, and by the time he peered cautiously around the corner, Mikey was gone, the tunnel standing silent and empty. Blade let out a deep sigh, glancing around the maze of passageways surrounding him. "Alright genius," he muttered to himself, "what now?"

He had been so intent on getting away from Mikey he hadn't put a whole lot of thought into what his next move should be. He honestly had no idea where he should go or what he should do. He felt completely lost, like a piece of drift wood caught in the middle of a vast ocean.

_We just need you to come home…_

Blade stared down the deserted passageway toward the shaft, biting his bottom lip as he debated his next move. He could back-track through the tunnels and back up to the surface, but then what? He had no doubt that the wolf-pack would be coming after him eventually, and the thought of facing them on his own was more than a little daunting. It would be a lot more difficult for them to track him in the sewers, but he couldn't exactly wander around down here indefinitely. He needed to come up with some kind of plan. Unfortunately, his brain wasn't really cooperating at the moment, his thoughts coming as slow and thick as mud.

_We just need you to come home…_

With a small groan of resignation, Blade moved forward through the tunnel, heading toward the shaft where he had first ditched Mikey. He might as well push on and figure out exactly where these turtles lived. It wouldn't hurt anything, and the information might end up proving useful in the future. He could observe them from the shadows, learn whatever he could, and then make a decision about his next move from there. It wasn't like he had any other bright ideas, and though his fear and apprehension had momentarily taken the upper hand, he couldn't deny that he was still desperately curious about this turtle family.

Allowing his instincts to guide him, he slipped down the shaft and then silently navigated his way through the tunnels beyond, purposely keeping his mind blank and simply allowing his body to guide him where he needed to go. He moved cautiously, knowing that Mikey couldn't be that far ahead of him. He had to continually remind himself that he was in control now, not merely being swept along by circumstances. He could turn back any time he wanted.

But he didn't.

Mikey hadn't been lying about how close they were. Before he even realized it, he turned a corner in the tunnel only to draw up short. There was light up ahead, spilling into the tunnel from a hidden doorway standing partially open halfway down the wall. He could just make out the soft murmur of voices from the other side, though he was still too far away to tell what was being said.

"NO!"

Blade jerked at the sudden shout, instantly recognizing Mikey's voice. The orange turtle sounded upset, and Blade couldn't help his curiosity as he carefully crept forward, keeping his movements completely silent. He knew he was taking a risk, but he had come this far, and he wasn't about to turn back now.

Settling down in a section of deep shadows directly outside the door, he leaned forward and listened.

* * *

_A few moments earlier…_

Donnie was the first to recover from the shock of Mikey's sudden appearance. With a wordless shout he launched himself across the room, reaching their brother in three bounds. Raph was only a few steps behind him, his brain still trying to comprehend exactly what was happening. Not ten second ago he had been sitting at the table worrying an ulcer into the pit of his stomach, and now the source of all that worry was standing only a few feet in front of him. He blamed his sleep deprived mind for the fact that he was having trouble processing it all.

"Mikey," Donnie gasped, reaching out and grabbing their brother by his shoulders. "Where the _hell_ have you been? We've been worried sick about you! We thought you'd been taken." Then, before Mikey could even begin to form a reply, Donnie was dragging him forward into a bone crushing hug. "Don't you _ever_ scare me like that again!"

Standing a few feet away, Raph watched the reunion with wide eyes, a wave of pure relief washing through him. Mikey was really here! He was okay! He felt the heavy weight that had settled over his chest during the night ease somewhat, the beginnings of a wide grin spreading across his face.

"Hey, D," Mikey greeted, his voice coming out slightly muffled as his head was buried in his brother's shoulder. "Missed you too, bro…but could you maybe not squeeze me quite so tight?" The last was said with a painful sounding wheeze.

Donnie immediately released him, taking a small step back, his gaze sweeping worriedly up and down Mikey's battered form. Raph was doing his own inspection, and his grin faded as quickly as it had come at the sight of the dried blood caking his brother's arms and one side of his head.

Mikey gave them a small smile that was probably supposed to be reassuring, but there was a weary sadness in his eyes that only caused Raph's concern to grow.

"What happened?" he demanded, his voice coming out gruffer than he had intended as anger flashed like a hot flame through his veins. "Who did this to you?" He was pretty sure he already knew the answer, but he couldn't stop himself from asking anyway. His fists clenched tightly at his sides at the knowledge that someone had hurt his brother, and he hadn't been there to stop it.

Mikey let out a soft sigh, shaking his head slightly. "Relax, guys, I'm fine," he muttered, even as he winced and rubbed lightly at the side of his plastron, the movement sending small flakes of dried blood drifting down from his arm to sprinkle across the floor.

Raph snorted, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning at his brother. "Nice try buddy, but that's not going to fly. I hate to break it to you, but you're not that great of a liar."

The words were said lightly, and Raph honestly hadn't meant anything by them other than his own unique way of showing concern, but Mikey still stiffened, something dark flashing in his eyes.

"Too bad the same can't be said for you, eh Raph?" he retorted, his voice soft yet carrying an undeniable sharp edge to it.

Raph blinked, unsure of what to make of the almost accusatory look his little brother was currently sending his way. He glanced over at Donnie, but received only a small frown and confused shrug in return.

"What exactly is _that_ supposed to mean?" he demanded, more bewildered than angry. He knew Mikey had likely been through one hell of a day, so he did his best to cut his brother a little slack. Mikey looked every bit as tired as he and Donnie, and he knew from past experience that even his lighthearted little brother could get a bit irritable when faced with an overabundant lack of sleep.

"It means I know you lied to me," Mikey replied stiffly, his gaze locked on Raph, a flash of anger sparkling somewhere deep in his light blue eyes. "You lied to me about what happened the night of the explosion!"

Raph stared at his brother in complete surprise, feeling his stomach clench in sudden, inexplicable apprehension. "What?" he muttered reflexively, though he had a sinking feeling he already knew _exactly_ where Mikey was heading with this.

Mikey let out a frustrated sounding huff, his frown deepening. "You _know_ what I mean," he ground out. "You told me the explosion caused the ceiling to collapse. You told me Leo was killed instantly. But that's not_ really_ what happened, is it Raph?"

"I…I don't…" Raph began, choking on his own words, his mind supplying him with absolutely nothing intelligent to say. He felt a cold dread wash through him, freezing him in place even as his heart began to pound wildly within his chest. He glanced desperately to Donnie for help, but for once his genius brother seemed to have nothing to offer, appearing every bit as thunderstruck and confused as Raph.

"I want the truth," Mikey pressed, crossing his blood encrusted arms over his chest in a way that reminded Raph painfully of Leo when his brother had been particularly determined about something. "I know you're hiding something from me. I can see it in your face. So why don't you stop pretending and just tell me what happened? _Did_ you leave Leo to die?"

Raph gasped, Mikey's soft question slicing into him with all the force of a physical blow, robbing his lungs of air. He stared at his brother in numb shock, unable to speak, unable to even _breathe_ as memories of that horrible night flooded, unbidden, through his mind. '_You can't save me.' _Leo's words echoed harshly in his mind, cutting deeply into his heart, leaving him forever torn and wounded. He saw once again his brother lying pinned beneath the heavy slab of rock, his expression one of pained determination as he bid Raph to leave him. He saw the unmistakable fear in Leo's eyes that he had tried so hard to hide as he whispered his final goodbyes, his tears gently lapped away by the steadily rising water. He saw himself walking away, Donnie pressed tightly to his side, fighting against everything in him to just keep going, to take one more step, to not look back…

Mikey was watching him expectantly, waiting for an answer, but Raph could only stare at him in rising horror, unable to speak past the large lump that had suddenly taken up residence deep in his throat.

As the silence stretched on, Mikey's expression slowly changed, first surprise, then disbelief, and finally shock passing over his features. "No" he whispered, the single word sounding as though it was torn from somewhere deep in his chest. He stared at Raph with wide eyes, his breath beginning to come in short, harsh pants. "NO!"

Raph flinched at his brother's shout, his mind screaming at him to answer, to give Mikey the denial he had obviously been expecting. But the words stuck in his throat, and he couldn't force them out.

It had been easy enough lying to Mikey before. Not just easy, but _right_. His little brother had already been in so much pain, both physically and emotionally, and Raph had known without a shadow of a doubt that learning the truth behind Leo's death would completely and utterly destroy him. And so he had lied. He had lied to protect Mikey from even more pain, and he hadn't once regretted that decision.

But now, staring at his brother's desperate face, Raph felt the lie turn to bitter ash on his tongue, and as much as he wanted to, he couldn't bring himself to spit it out. He had no idea where all this was coming from, why Mikey had chosen _now_ to challenge his story, but to say he was unprepared for it all would be a vast understatement.

"Mikey..." Donnie's voice was hesitant as he reached out an imploring hand toward their brother's shoulder. "I think we should just…"

Without breaking eye contact with Raph, Mikey smoothly stepped back and away from his brother's hand, his abrupt movement causing Donatello to break off whatever he was about to say. The look of horror on Mikey's face was slowly transforming, changing into something that was completely foreign to his face. Raph recognized the expression only too well, having seen it in the mirror on more than one occasion.

It was a look of pure, unadulterated fury.

"How could you!?" Mikey wasn't shouting anymore. In fact, the question was barely more than a whisper, but Raph still jerked, feeling the words cut into him deeply like the blade of a knife, bringing to the surface all the blame and guilt he had tried so hard to burry.

And still, he could say nothing.

With a harsh cry, Mikey launched himself forward, his blue eyes ablaze with fury. Raph saw the blow coming with plenty of time to dodge, but he remained where he was standing, his eyes closing in resigned acceptance a fraction of a second before Mikey's fist collided with the right side of his jaw. Mikey didn't pull his punch, and with an explosion of pain Raph felt himself staggering backward, nearly going down under the force of the blow.

"Mikey!"

Ears ringing, Raph gave his head a tiny shake before turning back to face his brother. Donnie had grabbed Mikey and was struggling against their little brother, holding him back from going after Raph a second time. "Please, Mikey," Donnie shouted, his voice rising several octaves in the way it tended to do when he was extremely stressed. "You don't understand! We tried! We tried to save him, but we couldn't…"

"Then you should have tried harder!" Mikey screamed back at him, twisting around and jerking free of his brother's hold with a powerful shove that sent Donnie stumbling back.

Raphael could only watch in stunned surprise, his mind struggling to reconcile his normally cheerful and fun-loving brother with the enraged turtle standing before him. This level of anger coming from Mikey seemed somehow so very _wrong_. Hurt and disbelief Raph could understand, but this rage…? It _hurt_ to see his brother like this. Hurt worse than the throbbing bruise he could already feel forming along his jaw.

Mikey took a step forward, and Raph thought his brother was about to attack him again, but before he could do anything a firm voice cut through the air of the lair.

"Yame!"

Raph's eyes flew to the side even as his body responded to years of training and froze in place. He could see Splinter standing a few feet away, his aged frame pulled up to its full height, his hands clasped behind his back as his eyes surveyed the scene taking place before him.

"Michelangelo," Splinter called as his eyes came to rest on his youngest, the relief on his face unmistakable. He moved forward, brushing past Raph so that he could reach out and lay a single furry hand on Mikey's shoulder. "I am glad to see you home. We have all be worried for you. Your brothers told me you had been taken…?"

Mikey was still glaring at Raph, his chest rising and falling rapidly with the force of his breathing, but he gave a slight shrug, replying autimatically to the obvious question in their Master's voice. "I got away," he muttered, his eyes dropping to the floor at his feet.

Master Splinter let out a deep sigh, and Raph saw his hand tighten on Mikey's shoulder. "Good," he murmured, a wealth of emotion carried in that single word. His gaze swept around the room to take in all of his children. "I would very much like to hear that story, but first, will someone please explain to me what all this shouting is about?"

Mikey's head jerked back up, and the heat in his gaze was strong enough that Raph found himself taking an unintentional step back. "They left him, Sensei," he whispered, his body practically shaking with the force of his emotions. "They left Leo alone to die!"

Mikey's face might have been a picture of anger, but Raph could also detect the hurt and confusion in his brother's voice. Beneath the rage and accusation, he sounded lost and desperate, and Raph felt his heart break for him. He looked to his father, praying that Splinter would know of some way to fix all this.

Of course his father already knew the truth behind Leo's death. Once they had been sure Mikey was going to be okay, he had called Raph into his room and requested the full story. By that time the weight of his guilt and grief had been so heavy that Raph had desperately needed to get some of it off his shoulders. And so he had told Splinter everything, the words spilling out of him like garbage down a flooded sewer pipe.

Retelling the story was the hardest thing he had ever done, the memories still so incredibly fresh and painful. He hadn't been sure exactly how Splinter would react, but he had been determined to take whatever censure or blame their father placed on him, knowing it was the least he deserved. He hadn't even been able to look up from the battered rugs beneath his knees as he finished his tale, too afraid of what he might see in Splinter's gaze.

But the condemnation he had been half expecting had never come. Instead, his father had merely rose, walked around the small table, knelt next to Raph, and pulled him into a tight embrace. He had held Raph as he hadn't held him since he was a child, and Raph had found himself clinging to his father desperately, releasing all the pent-up emotions inside of him in one massive wave. He had cried as he had never cried before, and for once, he had felt no shame in his tears.

As awful as it was, that night had been the first step toward healing for him.

But now, Mikey was asking him to relive it all over again, and Raph wasn't at all sure if he had the strength to do it. This time it wasn't just his own emotions he was afraid of shattering, but those of his little brother. It made everything ten times worse.

"Michelangelo," Splinter sighed softly, looking down at his youngest with a look of deep compassion. "There is much that happened that night that you do not understand."

"Then tell me!" Mikey cried, his tone at once both demanding and pleading. "I want to know!"

_No, Mikey, you don't want to know. Trust me little brother, you really don't want to know…_

Splinter glanced over toward Raph and their eyes locked, an unspoken communication passing between them. Raph felt his shoulders droop in weary defeat. All he had wanted was to protect Mikey, but it looked as though that was no longer an option. His brother would not stop until he learned the truth, no matter how much that truth might hurt him.

"Tell him Raph," Donnie's soft voice broke the silence, the look he gave Raph full of quiet resignation.

Raphael swallowed hard, then nodded, dropping his gaze to the floor as he tried to figure out exactly what he should say. A part of him wished that Splinter or Donnie would tell the story, but he knew that this was _his_ mess to clean up. _He_ was the one who had made the final decision to leave Leo behind, and _he _was the one who had decided to lie to Mikey about what had happened. Now it was up to him to find some way to fix this. If only he could be sure that he _could_ fix it and not just make it worse.

Taking a steadying breath, he looked up, his eyes immediately locking with Mikey's. His brother was staring at him intently, and it almost looked like he was holding his breath as he waited for Raph to speak.

"When the canister exploded," Raph began softly, "it caused part of the ceiling to collapse…"

Telling the story was every bit as difficult as it had been six months ago with Splinter, but Raph forced himself to push on. He told Mikey about finding Leo trapped beneath the giant slab of rock, his voice breaking slightly as he relayed his desperate efforts to free their brother and his subsequent realization that he just wasn't strong enough.

"Donnie tried to help me," Raph told Mikey softly, "but the entire room was on the verge of collapse, and the little we managed to move the slab almost brought what was left of the ceiling down on top of us." He looked away from his brother then, his eyes roving around the familiar room without actually seeing anything. "That's when Leo told us to leave him." He let out a small laugh that held not even a hint of true amusement. "Made me so mad, I almost punched him then and there."

He paused for a moment, gathering his courage. He knew the next part would be the most difficult to tell…and the most difficult for Mikey to hear.

"So what happened?" Mikey pressed, his voice for the first time picking up a hint of hesitancy, as though he knew something unpleasant was coming.

"I didn't know what to do," Raph answered honestly. "I didn't know how to help him. I needed some space…some time to think, so I left him with Donnie and went to check on you." He swallowed hard, unable to meet Mikey's gaze as he pushed himself to continue.

"When I reached you, I could tell you were in pretty bad shape, Mikey. You were going into shock and your vitals were bad. Really bad. It was like you were fading away right before my eyes, and it scared me to death. I knew if we didn't get you out of there soon…" he trailed off, biting his bottom lip and forcing his eyes up to meet Mikey's gaze, knowing just how deeply his next words were going to cut.

"I told Leo about your condition," he continued, his voice dropping low as the intense memories flooded through his mind once again, bringing with them almost unbearable pain. "He begged us again to leave him…to get you out. The water in the basin was rising fast. He didn't have much time. He knew we couldn't save him, but there was still a chance for you. But only if we acted fast."

Raph took in a deep breath to steady himself, watching sadly as dawning comprehension began to seep into Mikey's expression, his eyes widening and his face growing steadily paler. It was only with a monumental effort of will that he was able to force himself to finish.

"Donnie was hurt, so he couldn't bring you home by himself. I had to help him. We had no choice but to get you back here as soon as possible so Donnie could give you the care you needed. Even as it was, we were almost too late…"

A heavy silence descended over the lair, Raph unable to say anything more in the face of the rising pain he could clearly see blossoming in his little brother's face. Donnie had his head bowed, his shoulders hunched beneath the obvious grief the story's retelling had brought. Master Splinter stood silently watching them all, the sadness in his expression unmistakable.

"You left Leo to save me?" Mikey finally whispered, the words coming out choked and horrified.

Splinter moved then, reaching out to grasp Mikey's shoulder gently. "Your brothers were forced to make a terrible decision, Michelangelo. A decision that no one should have to make; Leave the brother they could not save, or stay and lose you both." His voice was soft and full of sadness and regret as he continued. "It was Leonardo's final wish that they save you, and Raphael and Donatello honored that wish, though it has cost them dearly."

Mikey made a small noise that sounded suspiciously like a barely stifled sob, and Raph felt his heart give a painful lurch in response. All hint of anger was gone from his little brother's face, but Raph would have almost preferred it over the anguish and guilt that had risen up to take its place. Raph could handle Mikey taking a swing at him, but his baby brother looking so devastated and broken…not so much.

"So it's my fault," Mikey whispered hoarsely, looking for all the world like he was about to be sick. "This is all my fault…"

"No!" Raph and Donnie exclaimed together, Donnie taking a step forward to lay one hand imploringly on Mikey's arm.

"You can't think like that Mikey." Donnie added softly. "We…we couldn't have saved Leo even if we _had_ stayed. He knew that, which is why he told us to leave him. Please understand, Mikey. This isn't your fault. None of this is your fault. If anything, it's _my_ fault for not warning him about the canister sooner."

Raph shook his head, letting out a weary sigh. Over the last several months he had honestly thought his family was beginning to recover, but this whole thing was proving just how much hidden pain and guilt there still was, buried beneath the surface but still very much present. Raph certainly carried his own fair share of it—it shouldn't have surprised him that his brothers did as well.

"It would have been better if it was me," Mikey whispered, his gaze fixed on the floor at his feet, showing no sign that he had even heard Donnie. "I'm the one that should have been left down there. It should have been me…"

For a moment no one said anything, too stunned by Mikey's soft proclamation. If he were being honest, Raph would have to admit that a similar thought had crossed his own mind on more than one occasion; that their family would be so much better off if Raph had been the one to die instead of Leo. But to hear that same thought coming from his baby brother's mouth…? It hurt in ways Raph couldn't even comprehend.

"Don't say that!" Raph ground out before anyone else could say anything. "Don't you _dare_ say that, Mikey!" The hurt was displaying itself as anger, but Raph couldn't help it. He stepped toward his brother, who was still flanked by both Splinter and Donnie, the fire in his voice combined with his sudden movement causing Mikey to glance up at him warily. Raph caught his eyes and held them with sheer force of will. "You think this family would be any better off with you gone? You think the pain would be any less? If so, you're a freaking idiot!"

Mikey's eyes widened slightly in alarm as Raph took another step forward, but though his arms with shaking slightly with the force of his emotions, it wasn't anger that had him reaching out and grabbing Mikey, hauling him forward against his chest and wrapping his arms tightly around him. It was true, Raph was more of a punch em' kind of guy than a hug em' kind of guy, but things had changed over the last several months, and for better or worse, Raph had changed right along with them.

"Losing Leo was the worst thing that has ever happened to this family," he muttered down to the top of his brother's head, "but losing you would have been every bit as bad, so I don't want to ever hear you say anything like that ever again, do you hear me! Not ever!"

Mikey remained tense in his arms for all of a half-second before he collapsed into the embrace, his forehead pressed against Raph's plastron, his arms coming up to grip the back of Raph's shell and hold him close. A soft sob escaped his throat, and Raph tightened his grip, fighting back his own rising emotions as he held his brother.

Donnie stepped forward, slinging one arm over Mikey's shoulder and the other over Raph's. "Raph's right. We'd be lost without you, Mikey," he whispered, leaning in and resting his forehead against the side of Mikey's bowed head.

A moment later Splinter also joined their group, his eyes shining suspiciously bright as he stepped to Mikey's other side and effectively closed in the small little circle, his furry arms resting lightly across his sons' shoulders.

"I'm sorry," Mikey half-sobbed into Raph's chest.

Raph wasn't sure what his brother was apologizing for, but it didn't really matter. Those words could cover such a multitude of things, so he merely tightened his arms and whispered back. "Me too, Mikey. Me too…"

* * *

In the shadowed tunnel directly outside the lair, Blade sat with his back pressed against the wall, his eyes fixed unseeing into the darkness in front of him. He felt numb, his mind struggling to process everything he had just overheard.

Ever since learning of the turtles' existence, he had been desperate to discover the truth about the night Viz had saved him. He had wanted to know exactly who these mutants were and what connection he had to them. Everything he had been told about them had made them sound like enemies, but something deep inside had still compelled him to search them out…search out the answers. And now, sitting on the cold stone floor in the absolute last place he had expected to find himself, he had finally learned the truth.

Now if only he could figure out exactly how he should feel about it.

Viz had been telling him the truth all along. The other turtles _had_ abandoned him. Just not for the reasons Blade had come to suspect. They had left him in order to save Mikey. They had left him by his own request. The shock of that information had yet to wear off.

Of course, he had no memory of that night to confirm any of this, but somehow he didn't need it. He just knew it to be the truth. The deep emotion he had heard in Raph's voice as he told the story wasn't something that could be faked, and it had struck a chord deep within Blade, resonating something both painful and yet freeing.

It was a lot to process, and he was having a hard time making sense of the myriad of emotions coursing through him, yet strangely enough the anger that had been his constant companion for the last week wasn't one of them. He thought about Mikey—light blue eyes dancing mischievously above a wide, grinning mouth—and he couldn't even find the hurt in him that had been the root of his anger from the very start. If anything, he merely felt…_relieved_.

Nothing had really changed about his circumstances, but somehow knowing the reason _why_ all this had happened…

…Well, that changed everything.

Which of course led to a single, burning question. What now?

It was only a matter of time before Mikey told the others about him, and then his brothers would undoubtedly come looking for him.

_His brothers_…

It was the first time he had allowed himself to think of the other turtles as his brothers, and the wave of warmth and longing that small admission brought with it was undeniable. The source of that warmth was mere feet away, on the other side of a partially open doorway.

A doorway that had perhaps been purposely left open?

He had heard it in their voices, in the soft echo of pain and grief that had reached him all the way out in the tunnel; Leo had meant something to them. He had been important to their lives. If Mikey's earlier reaction to him hadn't been enough to prove it, then the events of the last few minutes certainly were. If Leo had survived that horrible night, he would have been welcomed home to this family with open arms and joyful tears.

The only problem was, Leo _hadn't_ survived. Blade had.

So, now he was at a cross roads, a monumental decision looming before him…a decision he knew he would have to make quickly.

Did he stay and join this family in the hopes that Leo could somehow be saved from the dark recesses of his mind? Or, did he accept the probability that who he had once been was likely gone forever and move on, leaving this place behind him and starting life anew as Blade?

He knew without a shadow of a doubt that no matter which path he chose, there would be pain. Pain for him, and pain for the grieving family that stood so close on the other side of the stone doorway.

He couldn't deny that he longed to go to them. He longed to step into the bright swath of light and simply allow this families warmth to wash over him, to ease the heavy ache that he hadn't even realized until now filled his heart. He longed to be embraced, welcomed, and loved in the way he was sure he had once been, back before he had lost himself.

But would that be fair to them? Would it be fair to tantalize them with their brother's return when it was a very real possibility that Leo was truly gone forever? Would they accept Blade in his place, or would he merely serve as a constant and painful reminder of what had been lost? How long would it take before they cast him out, unable to stand to see their brother's face on a stranger? And when that happened, would Blade be able to survive it? Would he be able to move on after having a taste of what was once his?

Somehow, he doubted it.

Drawing in a deep breath to help steady himself, he pushed himself up off the wall, surprised at how much effort it took. He felt weak and shaky, his body aching and complaining at the slightest movement. It seemed somehow fitting that his physical body would mirror the mental pain currently eating away at his mind.

A step to the left, and he would be standing in the light of the open doorway, ready to embrace the unknown.

A step to the right, and he would be retreating back into the dark shadows of the tunnel, leaving behind a broken piece of himself that could probably never be recovered.

It was time to choose.

TBC

_Okay, so a few author's notes on this chapter. I was originally going to make this chapter a bit longer, but after reading through it, I decided there is only so much emotional drama you can take at one time. So I decided to end it here.. With that being said, I am already hard at work on the next chapter and hope to have it up as soon as possible! I'm not just dragging it out to torture you, I promise!_

_For those of you who might wonder why Mikey didn't immediately tell his brothers about Leo…this is kinda how I see it. Mikey is the type of turtle that feels things very deeply, and though he mostly chooses to have a positive attitude about things, he is still human (or turtle), and sometimes can get dragged down. He was already upset about losing Leo, and then he is immediately reminded of the fact that Raphael lied to him about what happened. I can totally see him latching onto that single thought and chasing it down, getting so caught up in it all that he momentarily forgets everything else. But don't worry, our lovable little scatterbrain will soon get back on track, and then…? Well, I'll let you guys read and find out what happens then. _

_I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and look forward to hearing your thoughts on it! Thanks, as always for all the support. It means a great deal to me! _


	16. Chapter 16

_Sorry for the delay in getting this up, folks. I wrote most of it, decided I didn't like it, and started over again from scratch. For some reason this has been perhaps the hardest chapter for me so far. Anyway, hopefully it turned out alright._

_Thank you so much for everyone who has read and reviewed. I do try to respond to each review individually, but I don't always make it. Please know that your support and comments are truly treasured! Thanks again!_

* * *

Mikey had no idea how long he stood there, warmly secured in the center of his family's embrace, allowing their comfort to wash over his bruised and hurting heart, but eventually they all released him and took a step back. He felt strangely bereft without their arms around him, but at the same time he no longer felt like he was standing on the edge of a precipice, about to tumble over into darkness.

He had wanted to know the truth and Raphael had given it to him. He just hadn't expected it to hurt quite so much.

With an effort he lifted his gaze from the floor, unsurprised to find his family studying him worriedly, as though he were a delicate piece of glass that they were afraid was about to shatter. Considering how close he had felt to shattering only moments earlier, he couldn't really blame them. The pain and guilt were still there, swirling just beneath the surface, but for the moment at least he no longer felt as though he were about to drown in it.

His gaze landed on Raphael and he couldn't hold back a small flinch as he took in the purpling bruise already growing across his brother's jawline. Never before had he attacked one of his family with the rage and violence he had just shown toward Raph, a fact that left him burning with shame. His brother might have lied to him, but now that he knew exactly what had happened, he couldn't bring himself to stay angry at him. Raph had only been trying to protect him, and Mikey couldn't blame his brother for that.

"I'm sorry I hit you," he whispered, forcing himself to meet Raph's gaze and hoping that his brother could read the honest regret in his eyes.

Raph looked startled for a moment before quickly shaking his head. "Don't worry about it," he grunted, flashing Mikey a quick smirk as he added, "You hit like a girl anyway."

From beside them Donnie let out a small snort, but Mikey only returned his brother's smile with a small one of his own, feeling some of the tension in his chest ease slightly. He didn't bother trying to contradict Raph—he figured the golf ball sized bruise on his brother's jawline did a good enough job of that for him. He was just grateful Raph was being so forgiving. If any of them knew anything about anger and its consequences, it was Raphael, and his eyes held no hint of bitterness or blame.

"Let's go and get you cleaned up, Mikey," Donnie suggested softly, reaching out and gently grabbing his upper arm.

"Yes, and perhaps while Donatello works you can explain to us exactly what happened to you last night," Splinter added. "I am most curious to learn how you escaped from your enemies."

Mikey felt his eyes widen, unconsciously resisting Donnie's slight pull on his arm as his brother tried to steer him toward the med lab. "Ah yes, about that…" he hummed nervously, his heart picking up speed inside his chest.

After losing Leo in the sewers he had spent the remainder of the short trip home debating the best way to tell his family the news. If Leo had been with him it would have been easy, but without him it became much more difficult. How did you break it to your family that the brother and son they thought for sure was dead...the brother and son they had spent the last six months grieving for…was actually still alive? How did he make them believe him and not just usher him into Donnie's lab to get his head checked? He knew all too well how difficult it had been for _him_ to accept the truth, and Leo had been standing right in front of him!

The whole task was a bit daunting, but Mikey couldn't put it off any longer. Already he had allowed himself to become distracted for too long. Leo could be getting further and further away, and the sooner he could convince his family he was still alive, the sooner they could begin their search for him. Nothing would be right again until they had their brother home once more.

"What is it, Michelangelo?" Splinter pressed, his dark eyes observing Mikey astutely. "I sense you have something important you wish to share with us?"

"Uh, y-yeah," Mikey muttered, reaching up nervously and scratching at the itchy side of his head, sending a cascade of dried blood down onto the floor.

Donnie reached over and slapped his hand away, casting him a firm look that clearly said 'stop that.'

"There _is_ something I have to tell you," Mikey admitted, chewing on his bottom lip nervously. "But you're probably not going to believe me."

They merely stared back at him, waiting expectantly for him to continue, and Mikey found himself shifting anxiously beneath their gaze. Why the shell was this so hard!? He was bringing his family the best news _ever_! He just had to figure out how to get the words out without sounding completely crazy. It wasn't as easy as it sounded. He really didn't know how to tell them other than to just spit it out, and so…

"Leo's still alive."

The words came out of him in a rush, then seemed to hang in the still air of the lair. Mikey felt his heart pounding wildly inside his chest as he waited for his family's reaction, barely daring to breath as his gaze flickered from face to face.

It took a moment for what he said to register, but once it did…

Mikey didn't think he had ever seen Master Splinter look so stunned. His father's entire body stiffened, like a string pulled suddenly taught, his expression one of complete shock. He seemed to be momentarily frozen, his mouth hanging slightly open but no sound coming out, his dark eyes so wide they seemed to completely fill his furry face.

In strange juxtapose, Raph and Donnie's reactions were completely the opposite. Neither of them seemed at all surprised by his sudden pronouncement. Instead, they merely exchanged a quick look, an unspoken communication passing between them, and when Raph turned back to face him he had a look of sad resignation on his face.

"Mikey…" Raph began hesitantly, his voice as soft and gentle as Mikey had ever heard it. "I know what you saw—we saw it too—and Donnie thinks…but…but it can't…I mean…there's no way…" He trailed off helplessly, obviously unable to finish, casting a worried glance over toward their father.

Mikey held back a small sigh, not really sure what Raph was rambling on about, but knowing from the look on his brother's face that he wasn't convinced. Well, he couldn't say he was surprised. He had been expecting this from the start. He knew getting them to believe him wasn't going to be easy, but he had to find a way.

"He's alive," he repeated softly. "I know it's a lot to take in, and I know you think I'm crazy, but it's the truth!"

Raph opened his mouth to reply, his expression torn, but Master Splinter beat him to it.

"How?" the old rat asked simply, his voice tuned so low that even standing a few feet away Mikey had to strain to hear him. "How do you say such a thing?"

Mikey took in a deep breath, meeting Splinter's eyes with his own. A flicker of uncertainty went through him as he suddenly noticed just how frail and fragile his father looked. The last few months had not been kind to the rat master, and they had all worried for his health. And now Mikey had dropped this bombshell on his head… No wonder Donnie and Raph looked so concerned.

But it was too late to turn back now.

"I don't know the whole story," he replied slowly, "but I know the wolves saved him. They must have arrived shortly after we left. They somehow got him free and he's been living with them ever since in a warehouse on the edge of the Bronx."

Splinter bowed his head, as though the news was simply too much to take in, but Raph and Donnie gaped at him, finally showing the surprise Mikey had been expecting from the start.

"Mikey, h-how do you know all this?" Donnie gasped, staring at him with wide eyes.

"Uh, because I was there, remember," Mikey replied, lifting up his blood encrusted arms. "And because he told me. Well, sort of…"

"You…you _talked _to him?!" Raph interrupted hoarsely, looking completely stunned, his green eyes almost comically wide.

Mikey nodded. "Yeah," he answered softly. "He's the one who helped me escape."

His words were met with a brief stunned silence, and then, like a tide breaking over a dam, Raph and Donnie both began speaking at once. Mikey was pretty sure they were asking him questions, but their words kept tripping all over each other in a chaotic jumble that he couldn't even begin to decipher. Luckily it didn't last very long.

How they all managed to hear the small noise Splinter made over all the noise was beyond Mikey, but they all turned at the same time just as their father stumbled, his cane clattering to the floor as he began to slowly pitch forward. Donnie and Mikey both lunged forward to catch him, but Raph beat them to it, grabbing Splinter loosely around the waist and holding him upright with a single muscled forearm.

"Sensei!" Raph gasped, holding their father as though he were a fragile cup that might shatter in his grip at any moment.

"Leonardo," Splinter whispered raggedly, the depth of emotion that filled his voice as he said his eldest son's name causing Mikey's throat to tighten and tears to sting the edges of his vision. The broken longing in their father's voice was almost painful in its intensity.

Raph looked over at him, his expression a mixture of pain and wild, desperate hope. "Are you sure, Mikey?" he ground out, his voice coming out low and rough, as though he was having trouble forcing the words out. "You're _sure_ that Leo's still alive?"

Mikey gave a single, sharp nod. "I'm sure," he replied in a whisper.

Raph closed his eyes, letting out a long and shaky breath before suddenly sweeping Splinter up into his arms and turning with him toward the couch. Mikey and Donnie followed, watching as their older brother carefully set their father down on the end of the worn sofa, kneeling down before him and resting a hand on Splinter's knee. "You okay, Sensei?" he asked softly, the concern in his voice unmistakable.

Splinter took a deep breath, one of his furred claws coming to rest on top of Raph's hand. He slowly lifted his head and looked over at Mikey, his dark eyes shining softly. "Tell me," was all that he said, but his shoulders straightened slightly and he sat up taller on the couch, indicating to his sons without words that he was ready to hear more.

Mikey glanced at Raph, receiving a small nod from his brother. He took a deep breath, then began to share his story.

"Leo saved me," he started softly, hearing the lingering wonder and excitement in his own voice. "The wolves wanted information about who we were and where we came from, which is probably why they took me in the first place. I knew they would just kill me once they got what they wanted, so I refused to talk. They roughed me up a bit, and then left. The next think I know, Leo's there." He shook his head, remembering his own shock at seeing his brother for the first time…how he had convinced himself it was all just a dream.

"We talked for a bit and then another one of the wolves showed up," he continued, choosing for the moment to keep to himself the accusations Leo had hurled at him, knowing they would only hurt his brothers. Now that he knew the truth he was all the more desperate to find Leo and explain it all to him.

"He kept calling Leo "Blade", and he wasn't too happy to find him there with me. He attacked Leo and they fought, but Leo managed to knock him out with the hilt of his sword. He freed me and we were heading home together but…" he trailed off, knowing this next part would be the hardest to tell. "I lost him," he admitted, his gaze dropping to the floor at his feet. "I took my eyes off him for just one minute, and the next thing I know, he's gone."

"Gone?" Raph repeated incredulously, standing suddenly to his feet. "What do you mean _gone?"_

Mikey gave a helpless shrug. "He was nervous about coming home. I _knew_ that, but I never thought he would bolt!"

Donnie reached out and grabbed his arm, his face a picture of confusion. "Hold on, Mikey. Why would he be nervous about coming home?" he demanded, his tone taking on the frustrated note he always adopted when things were happening too fast and even his genius brain was having difficulty keeping up with it all.

Mikey sighed, knowing he wasn't exactly giving his family the detailed version of the story. He bit his lip, his gaze flashing briefly across all their faces before he blurted out, "He doesn't remember us." And then, in the face of their shocked expressions, he added, "He doesn't remember anything. He doesn't even remember who _he_ is!"

There was a few seconds of stunned silence and then…

"Ah shit," Raph groaned, and it was a measure of how distracted Master Splinter was that he didn't call him out for his language.

Mikey cringed inwardly at the obvious dismay he could see painted across his family's faces, understanding the feeling all too well. He knew exactly how overwhelming it could be, learning that Leo was still alive but that he didn't remember them. Half the time he wasn't sure _how _he was supposed to feel; overjoyed or concerned, excited or afraid. It was all just one big confusing jumble.

Once again it was Raphael who was the first to break the heavy silence, his voice low and tight. "Where were you when you lost him Mikey? How long has it been?"

Mikey shook his head. "Not long," he answered quickly. "We were at the shaft in the East tunnel when he disappeared. I tried looking for him, but…" He trailed off, looking helplessly at his brothers.

"My sons," Splinter's voice was soft and yet all their attention was instantly drawn to his bent form. He looked up at them with glittering eyes, his expression as intent as Mikey had ever seen it. "Find him," he whispered. "Find Leonardo and bring him home."

* * *

Everything was happening so fast.

Donnie wasn't too proud to admit he was having a bit of a hard time processing it all. As convinced as he had thought he was that Leo was still alive, hearing it confirmed by Mikey had still left him reeling. And then finding out that his brother had been living with the wolf gang this whole time, and that he had lost his memory...? It was all just too much. Joy and relief warred in equal parts with fear and worry and a dozen other emotions he was having trouble identifying.

As overwhelmed as _he_ felt, he suspected Raph was even more so. His big brother was moving as though in a daze, the expression on his face that of someone who had absorbed one too many shocks and was now just moving on autopilot. Donnie suspected that there was a part of Raph that still refused to entirely believe that Leo was really alive…that wouldn't believe until he had seen him face to face for himself. Whether it was just natural skepticism or a defense mechanism to protect his heart, Donnie didn't know. He supposed it didn't really matter. If everything worked out right, Raph would have his proof soon enough…

They stopped just long enough to collect their weapons from the rack by the door—Mikey making an excited sound when Raph handed him his nunchucks—and then they were pushing out into the dim sewers beyond, their thougths on one single goal; finding Leo

The last thing any of them were expecting was to find the object of their search standing outside the lair waiting for them.

Donnie was the first one out, so he was the first to see him. Leo was standing only a few yards away down the tunnel, his feet spread slightly apart and his arms crossed over his chest, a guarded expression on his face as he stood watching them. Donnie was so startled by his sudden appearance that he stumbled to a halt, causing Raph to run into the back of his shell.

Watch it, D…" Raph choked on his words, freezing right beside Donnie as he too saw their brother.

"Leo!"

Mikey was the last out, and the joy in his voice when he spotted Leo was unmistakable. He skipped around his frozen brothers, darting forward and throwing his arms around Leo in wild abandon. "You came back!"

Leo staggered slightly beneath the exuberant greeting, but he lifted one hand to pat awkwardly at the back of Mikey's shell. "Yeah, Mikey," he murmured softly, "I came back."

Donnie felt his heart beat faster at the sound of Leo's voice, the familiar timber striking a chord deep within him. He had honestly thought he would never hear that voice again. He found himself moving forward slowly on numb legs, fighting down the wild urge to do just as Mikey had done and grab Leo into a tight embrace and not let go. Not for a long, long time. But he could clearly read the nervous apprehension in every line of his brother's stance, and unlike Mikey, he couldn't just ignore it, no matter how badly he might want to.

His little brother's words kept echoing over and over again inside his head; _'He doesn't remember us…He doesn't even remember who _he_ is._'

He tried to imagine what it must be like to lose all your memories…to not even know yourself. He couldn't even begin to comprehend the amount of confusion and uncertainty that Leo must be feeling right now, and the last thing he wanted to do was add to his brother's stress.

"Hey, Leo," he murmured, coming to a stop a few feet away, his brown eyes locked on his brother's familiar blue. He wanted to add something more, but was unsure what to say. Welcome back? Glad you're alive? Nothing seemed quite adequate to portray exactly how he was feeling at the moment.

Luckily Raph was there to make up for his lack of eloquence. Moving up to stand next to Donnie, he whispered, "Glad you're home, brother." His voice was low and rough, the way it got when his emotions were about to get the best of him and he was struggling hard to control them.

Keeping one arm slung over Leo's shoulders, Mikey swung around to face them, grinning so wide Donnie wondered if his cheeks hurt. He understood his little brother's joy, and he was sure once he had a little time to let the shock wear off he would be grinning just as big. But at the moment he was still having trouble letting everything sink in.

Leo was here. His brother was standing right in front of him!

"I...I don't…" Leo paused, clearing his throat, his eyes flickering back and forth between Raph and Donnie. "I don't remember you," he finally finished, his voice a bare whisper, disappointment sparkling deep in his blue eyes.

"We know," Donnie replied quickly, trying hard not to show how much those words stung. "It's okay. We…we'll figure it out." He reached out slowly to lay his hand on his brother's arm, relieved when Leo didn't flinch away from his touch. His brother's skin was warm and solid beneath his hand, proof that this was all very real and he wasn't just imagining it. Donnie felt his throat tightening, and it was only with a supreme effort that he was able to fight back the tears gathering in the corners of his eyes.

"Leo, this is Raphael and Donatello," Mikey stated, nodding at each of them in turn. "But you can just call them Raph and Donnie for short. Only Master Splinter uses their full names. Remember I was telling you about them…?"

Raph let out a small sound that was probably supposed to be a snort but instead sounded suspiciously like a half-sob. "Hope you didn't believe everything he said," he huffed, obviously struggling hard to ignore the fact that he was being introduced to his own brother.

"Hey," Leo greeted awkwardly, his gaze flashing briefly over their faces before dropping down to the ground at his feet.

Donnie swallowed hard, fighting against the sudden swell of emotions that left his chest aching and his breath burning in his throat. He was overjoyed to see his brother again, he really was, but there was an underlying sense of _wrongness_ to it all. Against all odds Leo had returned to them, and yet instead of the joyous and excited reunion this moment deserved, there was an awkward tension in the air, the slightly wary and detached look in their big brother's eyes driving home the fact that Leo…wasn't really _Leo_ right at the moment.

Donnie tried to convince himself that it didn't really matter, but the truth was, it _did_ matter. Leo seemed so hesitant and unsure, so unlike the strong and confident leader he had once been, and Donnie felt his heart ache for what his brother had lost. He could only hope that Leo's memory could be restored. He didn't even want to _think_ about any other alternative.

"Come on in." Mikey urged, nodding toward the lair door. His voice was slightly more subdued now, undoubtedly picking up on the tension in the air. "Master Splinter is waiting for you."

Leo's gaze flashed to the door, and if anything he looked even more nervous than before. Donnie could practically feel the waves of apprehension rolling from him, the muscles beneath his hand tense and trembling slightly. He wondered briefly if Leo was considering trying to bolt again.

Raphael might have had the same thought, because he suddenly moved to stand by Leo's far side, reaching out to lay his hand on their brother's other arm, effectively hemming him in with nowhere to go but forward. Donnie wasn't quite sure how Leo would respond to the situation…whether or not he would feel threatened by the move…but to his surprise he felt his brother almost instantly relax beneath his touch. It was a strange response, all things considered, and Donnie couldn't help but wonder if on some deep level, perhaps even subconsciously, Leo realized that his brother's were there to offer support, not to harm him.

"Okay," Leo responded quietly. "Lead the way."

A small, hopeful smile tugged up the corners of Donnie's mouth, and he gave Leo's arm an encouraging squeeze before turning and heading for the still open doorway. He heard his brothers moving behind him and was suddenly overwhelmed with a heady sense of giddiness. How many times had they all walked through this door together after a night on patrol, knowing their father would be waiting for them on the other side? And now, miraculously, it was happening again. They were coming home…together. There were no words to describe just how deeply that simple knowledge struck him.

He had so many questions…so many things he wanted to say, but for now they could wait until Leo had been reunited with Splinter. Then they could all sit down and figure this out together. If Mikey was right and Leo had been living with the wolves these past months, then his brother was sure to have quite the story. Then there was the issue of Leo's memory loss. Donnie would need to ask some questions to figure out exactly what was causing it…and hopefully be able to figure out a way to help him. But honestly, he was just looking forward to sitting next to his brother and basking in the knowledge that he was alive and home with them once more.

One thing was for sure…he doubted any of them would be letting Leo out of their sights for a very long time to come.

Donnie wasn't surprised to find Splinter standing on the front landing waiting for them, his sharp ears having undoubtedly picked up their conversation in the tunnels beyond. Their father was standing strong and tall, betraying none of the weakness that had bent his frame only minutes earlier, but Donnie's sharp eyes picked up on the telltale trembling in the hands that held his cane in a double fisted grip before him.

He could tell the moment Leo entered the lair by the expression on Splinter's face, a combination of wonder and pure joy. He didn't race forward to greet his son as Donnie was sure he wanted to, but one of his hands lifted from his cane in an almost unconscious reaching gesture.

"Welcome home, my son." Splinter's voice was soft and full of warmth, his dark eyes shining brightly. "Words cannot express how good it is to see you again."

Donnie turned to look at his brother, curious what Leo's reaction to Splinter would be. He found his oldest brother still sandwiched between Mikey and Raph, his gaze locked on their father's face, his expression one that Donnie had difficulty deciphering. There was no fear or horror on Leo's face, but there was no recognition either. He looked just as he had out in the sewers moments earlier…uncertain and a bit wary. But there was something else there too…

Leo gave Splinter a respectful nod before allowing his gaze to flicker quickly around the room. He swallowed hard, his mouth opening and then just as quickly closing again. Then, with absolutely no warning, he suddenly swayed, his body tipping dangerously to one side. If Raph hadn't been there to grab his arm and help steady him, he might have fallen.

"I…I don't feel…" he began, but never finished, all the color draining from his face all at once. His body gave a single, violent shudder, and then his legs gave out on him, sending him down to his knees, a surprised Raph still gripping one arm as Mikey reached desperately for the other, the two of them just managing to keep him from toppling forward onto his face.

It all happened so fast Donnie was left momentarily frozen, staring at the scene unfolding before him with wide eyes. Then Raph called his name, his voice slightly panicked, and he managed to break free from his surprised stupor, stumbling forward and dropping to his own knees in front of Leo, vaguely aware of Master Splinter hovering right behind him.

Leo's head was bowed, his breath coming in harsh little pants, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. Instinctually Donnie reached out and let the back of his hand rest on his brother's forehead, wincing slightly at the heat radiating from the pale green skin. He had noticed it earlier, when he had touched Leo's arm, but it hadn't dawned on him at that moment just how hot his brother felt.

"Leo?" he called worriedly, his eyes scanning his brother's form, taking in the blood stained bandage around Leo's arm and the bruises around his throat, inwardly cursing himself for not noticing before just how sick his brother looked.

Leo let out a soft moan, lifting his head slightly and peering up at Donnie with glazed eyes. "Not…feeling…too well," he rasped out.

Donnie quickly looked up, meeting Raph and Mikey's worried gazes. "Get him to the couch," he ordered brusquely. "Sensei, can you please go and grab him a glass of water?"

He never heard Splinter leave to do as he asked, his full attention on the sick brother in front of him. Raph and Mikey gently hoisted Leo back onto his feet, slipping their shoulders beneath his arms and carrying him carefully forward toward the couch. Donnie left them to their task, racing away to his lab to grab his medical kit, moving around the room and throwing various items he might need into the bag.

He returned to the living room moments later to be greeted by the distinct sound of retching. Leo was seated on the couch, leaning forward and unceremoniously heaving the contents of his stomach into the metal trashcan Raph was holding in front of him. Mikey was sitting next to him, one arm wrapped around Leo's shell to help hold him upright as Splinter stood silently to one side, a glass of water held in one hand, his face a mask of concern.

Donnie hurried over, ignoring the sour stench of bile. He placed one hand on the back of Leo's shell as his brother finished purging the contents of his stomach. When the heaves at last faded away, Leo fell back against the couch cushions, breathing raggedly, his face pale and exhausted.

"S-sorry," he whispered, unable to meet any of their eyes, his expression one of mortified embarrassment.

"Don't be," Donnie said gently, slipping down on the couch next to his big brother as Raph unobtrusively removed the trashcan. "We've all seen each other sick before," he added, reaching out his hand for the cup in Splinter's hand. "Do you think you can drink anything?"

Leo opened his eyes to squint at the water Donnie was holding in front of him, his expression both longing and repulsed.

"I don't know if I can keep it down," he admitted softly, his voice ragged and hoarse.

"Just try," Donnie replied lightly. "If you lose it, we'll just get you some more."

Leo obediently reached for the water, but before he could grab it Mikey reached over and plucked the cup from Donnie's hand. Momentarily surprised by his little brother's actions, Donnie belatedly realized just how badly Leo's hands were shaking. There was no way his brother could have held onto the cup on his own.

"Here, let me," Mikey stated softly, reaching his free hand out to cup the back of Leo's neck as he lifted the water to his brother's lips, tipping the glass just enough to let a small trickle flow out into Leo's mouth.

Leo looked even more embarrassed, but he let Mikey help him drink, taking several small sips before shaking his head that he was finished. Mikey removed the cup, handing it back into Splinter's waiting hands.

"Here…" Raph was back and handing Donnie a wet washcloth.

Donnie nodded his thanks, folding the cloth quickly and leaning forward to place it on the back of Leo's neck. His brother jerked when the wet washcloth came in contact with his heated skin, but then he let out a soft sigh, his muscles relaxing slightly.

"How are you feeling now?" Donnie asked, reaching out and clasping his brother's wrist, surreptitiously taking Leo's pulse as he waited for an answer.

Leo shrugged weakly. "Dizzy," he admitted quietly. "My head hurts a bit and my chest is a little tight," he added, almost as an afterthought.

Donnie nodded, frowning as he noted his brother seemed to be panting slightly, as though struggling to catch his breath. The pulse beneath his fingers was steady but a little fast, and Leo's color had yet to return to normal. Despite his fever there was a fine sheen of sweat covering his face, and his eyes were slightly glassy.

"When did you start feeling sick?" he pressed, unconsciously slipping into his role of family medic.

Leo shifted nervously on the couch, his gaze meeting Donnie's for just a second before skittering away. "Just a few hours ago," he admitted softly. "But it wasn't this bad before…"

"Hmm..." Donnie nodded, quickly summing up Leo's symptoms in his mind; fever, dizziness and nausea, accelerated heart-rate, labored breathing, shakiness... The sudden onset of the symptoms concerned him the most, and he found himself staring at the bandage on his brother's arm in sudden suspicion.

"What's wrong with him?" Raph asked suddenly from where he was hovering just behind Donnie's shoulder, the concern in his voice evident.

Donnie just shook his head, glancing up long enough to meet Splinter's worried gaze from the other side of the couch. "Do you mind if I take a look at your arm?" He asked Leo softly. Any other time he would have just gone for it, but under the current circumstances the last thing he wanted was to do anything that might make his brother feel threatened.

Sure enough, Leo seemed hesitant, his gaze flickering around the room before coming to rest on Donnie. Donnie smiled reassuringly, inwardly aching at the hint of distrust he could clearly see reflected in his big brother's eyes.

"I just want to check for signs of an infection," he stated calmly. "Something's making you sick, and I don't think it's a virus. It will only take a moment, I promise."

"Come on, bro," Mikey urged from Leo's other side. "Donnie's really good at this stuff, and I happen to know he keeps a bag of lollipops in his med kit for if you're really good…"

Leo let out a small huff that could have been a weak attempt at laughter, his gaze immediately losing some of its intensity. He sucked in a deep breath before finally nodding, lifting his arm slightly so Donnie could reach it better.

Hiding his relief, Donnie reached into his med kit and pulled out a pair of scissors, casting Mikey a grateful smile before beginning to carefully cut the bandage from Leo's arm. "I hate to break it to you Mikey, but you ate the last of those suckers last week," he told his brother lightly. "You complained because it was your least favorite flavor, strawberry, remember?"

"Ah yes," Mikey sighed dramatically, nudging Leo's shoulder gently. "Sorry bro. If I had known you were going to miraculously come back to life, I _so_ would have left you that sucker."

There was no mistaking Leo's smile this time, tired and weak, but still definitely there. Donnie was glad to see it, but at the same time he couldn't deny the slight twinge of jealousy he felt over the easy way Mikey interacted with Leo. It was like his little brother didn't even notice the changes in Leo, he just treated him in the same way he always had, a response that obviously put Leo at ease whether he realized it or not. Maybe it was because of what they had already gone through together, with their escape from the warehouse and all, but Donnie highly doubted the reaction would be the same if he or Raph attempted to treat Leo with the same careless familiarity. It was obvious that Leo still felt uncertain and wary around them, a fact that upset Donnie more than he cared to admit.

With an effort Donnie pushed his dark thoughts away in order to focus on the task at hand. Gently peeling the dirty bandage away from his brother's arm he frowned down at the wound hidden beneath. He had to admit, he had been expecting something much worse than he found. The scratches on Leo's arm looked to be in the beginning stages of healing, the scabs broken open in a few places, but the cuts not bleeding heavily. The skin around the wound was slightly red and puffy, but not overly so, and the whole thing looked as though it had at least been kept clean.

"How does it look?" Splinter asked, moving to stand over them from behind the couch. Unsurprisingly, Donnie felt Leo stiffen slightly as their father drew nearer, but he didn't say anything and he didn't try to pull away, for which Donnie was grateful.

"Not bad," Donnie admitted, still frowning down at the wound. He sat back slowly, his eyes once more doing a quick scan of his brother's body, looking for any bruising or hidden injury he might have missed earlier. "Are you hurt anywhere else?" he asked, his eyes finally coming to rest on the bruises on Leo's throat. They looked terrible, and Donnie couldn't help but feel curious as to how they had gotten there, but the fact that his brother was talking and breathing okay indicated there wasn't any serious damage.

Leo shook his head and Donnie let out a soft sigh of relief. Maybe his brother really _was_ just sick, and the stress of being reunited with his family had exasperated his symptoms. He would give Leo a shot of antibiotics just to be sure, but it was beginning to look like his earlier fears were unfounded.

Turning back to his bag he pulled out the small pouch he had thrown in earlier containing their small supply of antibiotics. Of all the medical supplies he had managed to scrounge over the years, the antibiotics were one of the most valued because they were the hardest to obtain. Yet despite the difficulty in acquiring them, Donnie always made sure he had a constant fresh supply in the fridge in his lab. A far too close call with Mikey and a bout of pneumonia a few years back had made sure of that. He always got the liquid kind as well, as the pills tended to expire far too quickly and were a bit too mild for their mutant bodies.

"I'm going to give you something that will hopefully help," he told his brother as he carefully filled a syringe with some of the precious medicine. Once it was ready he turned back to Leo, surprised when his brother willingly held out his arm to receive the shot. It was true, Leo had never been afraid of needles like Raphael, but in his already nervous state Donnie had half expected his brother to put up at least a little resistance.

He was warmed by the show of trust.

That is, until his gaze fell on Leo's arm and the track of needle marks dotting the inside of his elbow. His breath caught in his throat and he froze, for a moment unable to believe what his eyes were seeing. The tiny scars formed a patchwork of dots across his brother's green skin, and there were so _many _of them. A flick of his eyes to Leo's other arm showed even more marks on that side, and a churning dread began to form in the pit of his stomach.

This couldn't be. It wasn't possible. Not Leo—Leo who often refused to take Tylenol because he didn't like any foreign chemicals in his body. He just couldn't believe it…

But the truth was impossible to deny, displayed in the hundreds of tiny indentations scattered across his brother's arms. This time it was Donnie who felt like he was about to be sick, realization dawning cold and hard inside his mind. Leo's symptoms weren't from being sick or injured. It was something much worse than that, something he had never in a million years thought he would ever have to deal with…

"Donnie?"

Mikey's voice jerked him from his thoughts, and he realized a bit belatedly that he had been sitting for several long seconds staring down at Leo's arm, the syringe held ready in his hand. Very slowly he lowered the needle back down into his lap, painfully aware of the eyes of his family fixed on him.

He caught Leo's questioning gaze, his heart pounding faster in his chest as he tried to think of exactly how to ask his brother what he needed to without sounding accusatory. He had to find a way. He couldn't risk giving Leo anything without first knowing what was already in his system, even though he was more than a little scared to find out.

"Uhh, Leo…," he started nervously before pausing to clear his throat. "I need…I need to know what it is that you've been taking. I can't give you anything else until I know."

Leo frowned, looking confused for a moment, his gaze following Donnie's down to the track marks on his arm. His eyes widened slightly with dawning comprehension, and he reacted almost automatically, reaching over with his other hand to cover the condemning marks. But not before the rest of the family finally saw what Donnie had been staring at.

Never any good at hiding his feelings, Mikey let out an audible gasp, his expression turning dismayed. Raph and Splinter made no sound, but Donnie could practically feel the tension radiating from them from where they stood, their gazes locked on Leo's now covered arm.

Donnie was still waiting for Leo's reply, but his brother said nothing, merely curled his arms in close to his sides and dropped his gaze. Donnie felt the dread in the pit of his stomach grow even larger, but he refused to give up.

"Please Leo," he pressed, forcing his voice to remain soft and calm despite the rising panic inside. "I…I think you might be suffering from withdrawal." The word tasted unpleasant coming out of his mouth, and he had to swallow before he could continue. "I can't help you unless I know what you've been taking."

He left unsaid the fear that he wouldn't be able to help regardless. He hadn't done a whole lot of research on the subject, but he knew enough to know that drug withdrawal wasn't pretty…it was frightening and ugly, and in some cases, even deadly. He tried not to think about how many needle marks he had just seen on his brother's arm, or what kind of drugs were passed around in dirty edge-of-town warehouses inhabited by punk gangsters who couldn't care less what kind of poison they put in their bodies. He just needed to figure out what was causing the problem and fix it. That was his role in the family…that was what he was good at.

"It's nothing," Leo muttered, his gaze still fixed on his lap. "Just something they gave me to help me sleep."

Donnie blinked, not quite sure what to make of that answer. "Do you mean a sedative of some sort?" he asked, feeling a quick flash of relief. Surely withdrawal from sleeping pills had to be a whole lot better than withdrawal from Meth, or any of the myriad of other drugs he had feared to learn his brother was hooked on?

Leo gave a small shrug. "Yeah, I guess," he answered vaguely.

Donnie fought back a sigh. "I need a little bit more information, Leo," he pressed, exchanging a quick glance with Master Splinter who gave him an encouraging nod. "Do you know what it was called? How long have you been taking it?"

Leo finally glanced back up, and Donnie was struck again by just how sick his brother looked. There were deep circles of exhaustion beneath his eyes, standing out starkly against the paleness of his skin. "I don't know what it was called," he answered softly, wiping at the fine sheet of sweat on his brow with the back of one hand. "It was just something they took from the lab. They used it when they first found me to keep me sedated until my body had time to heal. I developed a resistance to it, so they upped the dose, but then I became reliant on it. Now I can't sleep without it. I take it each night to help me sleep, that's all." He gave a small shrug.

Donnie's mind whirled as he processed everything his brother had just said, unsure whether he should feel relieved or more worried. If Leo didn't know what drug he had been taking, how was Donnie supposed to research it and figure out how to help his brother? Then the rest of what Leo said clicked home in his brain and his heart skipped a beat, his entire body going suddenly cold. "Oh no," he whispered, his eyes widening with dreadful realization.

"What is it Donnie?" Raph demanded, taking a step closer, his tone a mixture of frustration and concern. "He's going to be alright, right?"

Donnie closed his eyes, mentally reviewing all the notes he had taken from Stockman's lab. He had gone over them so many times they were practically memorized, which was how he knew he wasn't wrong in his sudden suspicion. It all made sense. Terrible, horrible, and yet undeniable sense.

"I think I know why Leo's lost his memory," he stated flatly, opening his eyes to find all his family staring at him, their expressions showing a mixture of surprise and concern. Leo's gaze was perhaps the sharpest, though the glassy look in his eyes definitely robbed it of some of its intensity. "You said you got the drug from the lab, right?" Donnie went on, "Stockman's lab?" He didn't need Leo's small nod to confirm this fact. He already knew. He _knew. _He let out a long breath, his shoulders bowing beneath the weight of this unwanted revelation.

"Donatello…explain," Splinter demanded, and if his voice was a bit sharper than normal Donnie couldn't really blame him.

"It was in Stockman's notes," Donnie replied, his voice sounding dry and emotionless even to his own ears. "He created a drug to wipe the wolves' long term memories so that Shredder could control them. It was the last step in his plan…the only step he didn't manage to complete. He put the drugs in the sedatives he was using to keep the wolves under control. According to his notes, he spiked the whole batch with it. All of it. And now, I'm guessing Leo's been taking that very drug for at least six months!"

A heavy silence followed his explanation, and Donnie watched as dawning comprehension caused lines of horror to appear on his father's and each of his brother's faces.

"But it's not _permanent_, right?" Mikey demanded, his voice rising slightly in pitch. "Now that he's stopped taking that drug, his memories will return won't they, Donnie?"

Donnie stared into his little brother's desperate face, unable to speak for a moment past the dryness in his throat. He could feel Leo and the rest of his family staring at him, waiting for his answer, but he couldn't bring himself to look at them.

"No, Mikey," he finally responded softly, barely able to push the words past the tightness in his throat. "I…I don't think they will…."

TBC

_Well, it probably is not the reunion you all were expecting, but there you go. And for those of you wondering about Raph's thoughts on all this…stay tuned. Plenty more angst, drama, h/c, and action left in this tale. As always, I appreciate hearing your thoughts…_


	17. Chapter 17

_Thanks, as always for all the support. I hope you all continue to read and enjoy! For those of you who celebrate it…HAPPY THANKSGIVING!_

* * *

April clutched her cup of hot coffee in one hand, staring out the living room window at the quickly darkening city outside. A rumble of thunder shook the apartment and rain splattered in a steady cadence against the window pane.

The storm had rolled in out of nowhere and looked like it would be hanging around for a while, casting all of New York in a false dusk. Normally April loved the rain, but today she found herself wishing it would go away. It was just one more thing that would make the task of looking for Mikey that much more difficult.

She debated calling Donnie, knowing they could take advantage of the premature darkness to get started on their search a little early. But the memory of how haggard and exhausted both he and Raph had looked when they had left early this morning stopped her. She knew they would need whatever rest they could find in order to face the difficult task ahead.

With a small sigh she turned away from the window and moved over to the table, sinking down in a chair across from Casey. The vigilante glanced up at her from the list of abandoned buildings he was perusing, offering a crooked smile.

"This is good, babe," he praised, lifting the stack of notes with the hand currently not strapped to his chest in a sling. "It's gonna help a lot."

April returned his smile with a small one of her own. "I hope so," she murmured.

She had put a lot of effort into the list, knowing it was the best way she had of helping find Mikey. She had researched each and every building, marking the ones she found as most promising with a star. It wasn't a lot, but she hoped it would be enough. Donnie had been right; there were an awful lot of abandoned buildings up in the Bronx, and it would take some time to search through them all. As it was, she doubted it was something that could be completed in a single evening. The thought of Mikey spending even one more minute than absolutely necessary in the hands of the enemy left her feeling physically ill.

"Wow, it's really coming down out there, isn't it," Casey commented, his gaze locked on the window behind her. "Too bad I left my raincoat at home. Guess I'm getting wet tonight."

April hummed her agreement, twisting her coffee mug around and around in her hands. "I wish I could go with you guys tonight and help look," she muttered, her comment causing Casey to look at her in surprise. "I hate the thought of just sitting here doing nothing when Mikey might be in danger."

"You've already done your part, babe," Casey assured her, giving the list in his hands a small shake. "Now you got to let us do ours. We're going to find him, and then we're going to kick those wolves' furry asses from here to the Hudson and back. They're going to regret ever _touching_ Mikey, I promise you that."

April frowned, placing her cup on the table and giving Casey a stern look. "I thought you promised you were going to try to avoid any fights," she accused, running a pointed gaze over his bandaged arm and the faded bruises that even now, over a week later, still created a patchwork of color on the exposed portions of his body. "You're not even fully healed from the _last _time," she added, doing her best to hide the flutter of panic she felt at the thought of him going up against the wolves again. The turtles had done it twice now, and neither time had ended well for them. And they at least had some natural armor to protect them. Casey, for all his skill at fighting, was far more vulnerable. He had gotten off lucky the first time, a badly bruised collarbone the worst of his injuries. But if he tried to face them again…

Casey, for all his thick skull, had enough sense to know that he had upset her. He quickly lifted his one good arm in a placating gesture. "Of course," he assured her. "Of course, babe. You know me, I just like to talk a little smack. Helps get me in the mood. Of course we're going to avoid a fight. Get in and get out. That's the plan. We'll save the beat-down for later. You have nothing to worry about."

April stared at him with wide eyes, then let out a soft moan as she dropped her head into her hands. Of course it was too much to think that Casey would play it smart…that he would hold back because he was injured. That wasn't really the way he worked. He would jump right into the thick of battle no matter what the consequences, and he would do it without a second thought. That was just who he was. It was this crazy wild side that she both loved and hated about him, and that scared her more than she cared to admit. If she didn't know how much Donnie and Raph needed him, she would have insisted that he stay home and as far away from those creatures as possible. The thought of losing him…of losing _any_ of them… It terrified her.

Why did all the most important people in her life have to be heroes?

Heroes got hurt.

Heroes got killed.

"I think you should call them," Casey stated suddenly, probably trying to change the subject before April tried to draw a promise from him that he might not be able to keep.

April sighed, but obediently removed her phone from her pocket. She punched the speed dial number that would connect her to Donnie, then lifted the phone to her ear. As she listened to the ringing on the other end of the line she hoped she wasn't waking Donnie from much needed sleep.

"_Hello?"_ He didn't sound as though he had just woken up, but he _did_ sound distracted. And worried. Which was understandable, all things considered.

"Hey Donnie," she greeted softly, then decided to skip the small talk and jump right to the point. "I hope I'm not disturbing you guys, but I wanted to let you know there's a thunderstorm going on up here. It's going to make things a bit wet and nasty, but it also means we can probably get started looking for Mikey a bit earlier if you're up to it?"

There were a few beats of silence on the other end of the line, and April found herself bouncing her foot up and down impatiently as she waited for his reply. Finally he spoke, his voice hesitant and more than a little guilty.

"_Uh…yeah…sorry April. Mikey…Mikey's…home already. I…I should have called, but…"_

April felt the breath catch in her throat, her eyes widening in startled surprise. "What!" she exclaimed, cutting off his stuttering reply. She leapt to her feet, uncaring as her coffee cup tipped over and splashed its contents across the table. Casey leapt for some napkins, eying her worriedly. "He's home?!" April demanded, overwhelmed by both relief and a quick swell of irritation. "And you didn't think to _tell _me, Donnie?! Do you have _any_ idea how _worried_ I've been?! How could you not call me?!"

"_I'm really sorry, April,"_ Donnie replied, his voice earnest. _ "I know I should have called, but things have been a bit…crazy…and…and…"_

He broke off, and in the sudden silence April could hear the distinct sound of someone being violently sick in the background. She felt her irritation fade away as quickly as it had come, replaced by concern. "Is he okay, Donnie?" she asked. "Is he hurt? What happened?" She glanced over toward Casey who had paused in the middle of cleaning up the spilled coffee and was listening to the one sided conversation intently. With a quick flip of a button she put Donnie on speakerphone so the vigilante could listen in as well.

There was another short beat of silence before Donnie replied, an undeniable tightness to his voice. _"He's okay, April. A few cuts and bruises, but nothing serious."_

April frowned, worrying her bottom lip nervously. "Then who do I hear being sick?" she demanded, beginning to pace in her need to relieve some of the restless tension she could feel growing across her shoulders and neck. Something was definitely wrong. The fact that Donnie had forgotten to call her with the news that Mikey was home safe was proof enough of that. It wasn't like the genius to overlook important details like that unless something pretty major was happening to distract him.

Donnie let out a long and slow breath, the sound carrying clearly across the line. When he answered his voice was soft and more than a little shaky, as though he was in shock.

"_It's Leo, April. He…he's alive…"_

* * *

Blade was pretty sure he was dying.

The sad thing was, a large part of him wished his body would just hurry up and get it over with already, instead of prolonging his misery.

Everything hurt.

His body was on fire, his limbs shaking uncontrollably as his muscles spasmed and cramped. His head throbbed in time to his racing heart, and it felt as though an elephant was sitting on his chest, making the simple act of breathing an interesting chore. With his eyes open the room dipped and swayed around him, but closing them wasn't much better, the nausea in his stomach like a living beast, tearing and ripping away at him from the inside out.

He was still a little shocked at how quickly this all had hit him. One moment he had been feeling slightly dizzy, and then the next…? He tried not to dwell too hard on the awkward reunion he'd had with his family. It was all just too humiliating, and he was suffering enough as it was.

"Here comes another one," a soft voice spoke from somewhere directly above him. Blade thought it was Donnie, but he didn't have the strength to look up and confirm it.

He felt hands close around his shell, lifting him up gently into a half sitting position and holding him steadily in place. A metal bin was thrust under his chin a moment before his stomach tried to violently turn itself inside out and crawl up his throat. Again.

The agonizing spasms in his abdomen seemed to go on and on, and all he could do was clutch the couch cushions in two white-knuckled fists as he waited for it all to end. He wasn't really sure what the bin was for, considering he wasn't even bringing anything up, having already purged his stomach long ago of anything and everything in it. He was just heaving and gagging on air now, which somehow hurt even worse.

"Easy…just take it easy."

"Breathe through it, my son. It'll be over soon."

"He's dehydrated. We have to get more fluids into him. I'm going to try to start an IV….

"Dudes, his fever's spiked again. He's burning up…"

Their voices swirled around him, distant and insubstantial, blending in with the hazy sea of green and brown that surrounded him. If he had been feeling better he would have felt extremely uncomfortable being the focus of all their attention, but at the moment he honestly felt too badly to care.

After what seemed like forever the heaving finally stopped, the beast in his belly settling back down for a temporary hiatus. Blade felt himself being gently lowered back down to the cushions, his body trembling uncontrollably as a low moan forced its way from deep in his throat. It shouldn't hurt this bad just to _breathe_! He was so exhausted he wanted nothing more than to close his eyes and drift off into the comforting oblivion of sleep. But even that small respite was denied him, his body simply refusing to let go of consciousness.

And so it went, time slipping steadily past, unmeasured and unheeded. Sometimes he was able to lay still, while others he writhed in torment, desperately seeking some way to alleviate the persistent pain wracking his body. He tried to keep his sounds of discomfort to himself, but was only moderately successful. Occasionally a groan would slip past his tightly clenched teeth, and a few times, when the pain grew to an unbearable level, he couldn't stop himself from crying out.

Through it all the others were there, gently lifting him whenever he began to gag, wiping his face and neck with cool cloths when his fever spiked and covering him with a thin, soft blanket when chills would wrack his body. Their gentle touch and softly spoken words provided him something tangible to cling to, an anchor to reality that helped ground him in the living nightmare his life had become.

Mikey was constantly hovering over him, his concerned face drifting in and out of focus, a steady monologue of encouraging words flowing from his mouth. Blade couldn't focus enough to make out everything the other was saying, but just as in the tunnels, there was something comforting in the constant chatter.

Raph was the one who lifted him when the beast in his belly grew too restless, his hands strong yet gentle, holding him steady through the agonizing spasms. He rarely spoke, and whenever Blade happened to look directly at him, the red banded turtle would almost immediately look away.

Donnie seemed to be constantly moving, fluttering around the couch were Blade lay, draping cool cloths over his heated body or checking on the IV that had at some point been placed in the crook of his arm. There was an almost frantic intensity in his movements, but whenever he looked down at Blade he would pause and offer an encouraging smile.

Of all of them, Splinter was the most still. He had pulled a chair up to the head of the couch, and he sat there now, one furred hand resting on the top of Blade's head. His head was bowed and his shoulders hunched, as though the sight of Blade in so much agony was simply too painful to watch. But he didn't leave, and the warm weight of his hand left Blade with a hollow ache in his chest that had nothing to do with his illness.

It was strange how their presence was somehow both overwhelming and soothing, frightening and reassuring, confusing and yet comforting. He was too tired and in too much pain to try and figure it all out, so he simply allowed the emotions to wash over him, not thinking too deeply about anything.

Only one thought kept repeating itself over and over again inside his mind.

_At least I'm not alone…_

* * *

Fourteen hours had passed since Leo's return home.

Fourteen hours that should have been spent in joyous celebration, but instead passed in tense worry and agonizing helplessness.

Raph cupped his hands beneath the heavy spray of the bathroom faucet, splashing water onto his face in the hopes the cold would help clear his mind of the haze of exhaustion that had settled over him. It had been far too long since he had slept, and the impact of everything that had happened over the last few days was finally catching up to him. The overload of emotions swelling just beneath the surface left him feeling restless and agitated, even as his extreme fatigue weighed him down and made it hard to think straight. It was a disconcerting feeling.

From the living room came the all too familiar sound of retching, and Raph hunched low over the bathroom counter, sinking his weight down onto his forearms as he stared despondently at his reflection in the mirror. His head hung low, and the eyes gazing back at him from the mirror were tired and haunted.

He didn't need to be in the living room to be able to clearly picture the scene taking place there, having relived it over and over again. If it weren't for the creeping hands of the clock above the TV, he might have feared they were all caught in some horrifying time loop, with no end in sight.

In all his life he had _never _seen any of his family this sick before. Donnie had informed them that withdrawal symptoms could go on for days, with residual effects lasting up to a week. It was grim news that had them all more than a little worried as Leo grew steadily weaker and weaker. What made it worse was that there was little they could do to help their brother other than to try and make him as comfortable as possible. Seeing him in so much pain with absolutely no way to ease it…?" It was a whole different kind of torture, and it was wearing on them all.

As the hours had dragged on into early morning, Donnie had suggested that they set up a rotation watch, with two of them staying awake and caring for Leo while two rested. It was a good idea, especially since they had no way of knowing how long their brother's illness would last and all of them were teetering on the brink of exhaustion. Even so, none of them had wanted to be the first to leave.

At last Master Splinter had agreed to take the first rest shift, and a quick draw of straws had Raph joining him. Though he would never admit it, there had been a part of him that had felt immensely relieved when he had drawn the short straw. It meant that at least for a little while he wouldn't have to watch helplessly as Leo suffered, unable to do anything to ease his pain. He couldn't even really offer much comfort, knowing that for all intent and purpose, he was a stranger to his brother.

It was this last that hurt the most.

So here he was now, knowing he should be heading for bed and some much needed sleep, but with no intention of doing so. He wouldn't be able to sleep anyway, no matter how tired he was. He was far too tense, like a rubber band stretched to its limit and dangerously close to snapping. He knew he needed to get out…get away for a while somewhere where he could sit and think and process everything that had happened.

Slipping out of the lair unseen was far easier than it should have been, Donnie and Mikey completely focused on caring for Leo as he writhed on the couch. Raph couldn't help but feel slightly guilty as he left, like he was abandoning them, and he resolved not to stay out too long. When he got back he would make Mikey go to bed, even if he had to drag his little brother to his room and _sit_ on him to make him stay. Donnie too for that matter. He would take care of Leo on his own if he had to.

Less than twenty minutes later he was on the surface, breathing in the cool night air as he raced over rooftops toward the familiar water tower near April's apartment. Leo had designated the spot years ago as their main rendezvous point whenever they were above ground, and Raph felt inexplicably drawn to it now.

It was still raining slightly, barely more than a drizzle, but the rooftops were wet with occasional pockets of deep water that gave testament to the ferocity of the nighttime storm. Raph barely noticed the moisture on his skin as he ran, and if he gave slightly more care to his footing as he leapt from building to building it was more from instinct than any conscious thought. Dawn wasn't too far off, but any pre-dawn light that may have peeked over the horizon was hidden beneath the lingering bank of gray clouds. The darkness suited Raph just fine.

Clearing the last jump he landed on the gravel rooftop with a soft thud, his instincts immediately alerting him to the fact that he wasn't alone. He straightened quickly, his fists closing around the hilts of his Sais. Before he could draw the weapons a familiar voice called out from the shadows.

"I thought you might come here."

Raph scowled, his hands dropping from his weapons to hang limply at his side. "Casey," he huffed, watching as the familiar form of his friend moved out from the beneath the shelter of the water tower. "What the hell are you doing here?" He tried to sound irritated, but he was so tired that his tone came out sounding more weary than angry.

Casey shrugged, looking unperturbed by Raph's distinct lack of welcome. "Donnie called and said you'd slipped out. He sounded a bit worried, so I decided to see if I could track you down. I brought drinks," he added, motioning behind him to where Raph could just make out the outline of two glass bottles sitting beneath the water tower.

Raph sighed, rubbing a weary hand down across his face, sending droplets of rainwater flying with the motion. So much for slipping out unseen. He felt even guiltier now, knowing Donnie had enough to worry about without Raph adding to it. He honestly had just wanted a little time alone to think.

Speaking of which…

He stared at Casey mutely, debating what his next move should be. In the past he would have had no problem telling Casey to get lost. But now…? Maybe it was the changes brought from all those long months thinking Leo was dead, or maybe it was simply that he was too tired to argue, but for whatever reason he couldn't bring himself to send Casey away.

'_And maybe you don't really want to be alone right now after all',_ a small voice in the back of his head silently mused.

With a small shake of his head Raph gave in to the inevitable, moving past Casey and throwing himself to the ground beneath the shelter of the tower. He reached out and grabbed one of the bottles, frowning as he read the label. "Coke?" he muttered, looking up and arching one eye ridge at his friend. "You couldn't do better than that, Case?" He didn't drink very often, mostly because Master Splinter didn't really approve, but tonight was a night he could have definitely used something a bit stiffer than caffeinated sugar water.

Casey gave a one armed shrug as he joined Raph beneath the tower, shaking rain water from his hair and reaching for the second bottle. "Filling the tank with alcohol isn't such a great idea when you're running on fumes, buddy. Trust me from past experience."

Raph snorted, but chose not to reply. He was pretty sure that Donnie had ordered Casey not to let him drink, which all things considered was probably a good idea. Reaching behind him, he used the lip of the cement block to pop the lid from the bottle, then lifted the glass to his lips and took a deep swallow. Casey copied his movements, and a few minutes of easy silence fell between them.

It didn't last long.

"So, Leo's alive," Casey stated softly, eyeing Raph from the corner of one eye.

Raph swallowed hard, his grip on the bottle tightening slightly. "Yeah," was all he answered.

He had known that Casey would want to talk about Leo. It wasn't every day that someone who was supposed to be dead miraculously returned back to life, and Donnie's quick explanation over the phone would have left more questions than answers. Unfortunately, Raph didn't really know much more than what his brother had already told them. It wasn't like they'd exactly had a chance to sit down and talk with Leo and figure it all out.

"Don said the wolves saved him?" Casey pressed, his tone taking on a slight note of incredulity. "And he's been living with them this whole time?"

Raph nodded wearily, taking another small sip from the glass bottle. "That's what Mikey said," he muttered, unable to hide the tension in his voice. He was grateful that the wolves had rescued Leo, he really was. But at the same time that knowledge also hurt. It was hard, knowing that others had succeeded in saving his brother where he had failed so dismally. He tried not to think about it too much, knowing the guilt and pain would eat him alive if he let it.

"And…and he doesn't remember _anything_?" Casey asked, his voice suddenly turning hesitant, as though he knew he was treading on dangerous ground.

Raph flinched inwardly as he gave a brief shake of his head, trying to swallow down the heavy ache in his chest. "Nope."

"Wild," Casey muttered, staring off into the darkness and slowly shaking his head. "Just wild. I feel like I've stumbled into the twilight zone." He turned to stare at Raph, his eyes shining slightly in the dim light. "You know I'm not going to be able to fully believe it until I see him for myself?"

Raph let out a small huff, his head falling back against the pillar behind him as he gazed up at the night sky. He certainly understood what Casey meant. He _had _seen Leo, and he still felt as though he was floating in a dream, everything so incredible and unreal he wasn't sure it wasn't just some elaborate illusion.

"I know," he replied softly. "Don't worry, you'll get your chance. Just…things are a bit… crazy…down there right now."

"I can imagine," Casey replied evenly. "But let me tell you…if Donnie thinks he can keep April away for long, he's got another thing coming. When I left her place she was pacing a hole in the carpet. I don't think I've ever seen her so wound up."

Raph winced, able to picture it all too clearly. Donnie had asked April and Casey to wait a while before coming down to the lair, and from the one sided conversation he had half listened to, Raph knew that April had not been too happy with the request. It was understandable. April and Casey were family, and Leo's apparent death had hit them hard as well. Being denied the chance to see him now seemed somehow unfair.

At the same time, Raph understood Donnie's reasoning. The last thing they wanted to do was cause Leo any more stress. He was already sick and surrounded by a family he didn't remember. Adding April and Casey to the whole scene would just complicate things. They would want to help, but their presence might end up doing more harm than good.

A reunion at this point seemed somewhat pointless anyway. Leo wouldn't recognize them, and seeing him now would just mean they'd have to watch him suffer. As harsh as it seemed, Donnie was probably doing them a favor by asking them to wait.

"Trust me Casey," Raph murmured softly, "there's nothing down there that she needs to see right now."

He could feel Casey's gaze on him, but he didn't turn to look at his friend, his eyes still firmly fixed on the dark sky above him.

"That bad, eh?" Casey sighed. "I watched a couple pals of mine go through withdrawal once. It wasn't pretty." He paused for a moment before adding softly, "Is that why you're up here?"

There was no hint of accusation in his voice, but Raph felt himself flinch anyway, like a naughty child caught somewhere he shouldn't be. The reaction irritated him, and he felt his hand clench into a tight fist around the coke bottle.

"I wouldn't have left if they needed me," he growled, hating the defensive tone he could hear in his own voice. "Donnie's got it covered. It's not like I can do much to help anyways."

"Of course," Casey replied easily, tipping his coke back and taking a deep swallow before adding, "but that's not really the point, is it?"

Raph shook his head angrily, turning to glare at his friend. "You don't get it!" He stated harshly. "It doesn't matter if I'm there or not. There's _nothing _I can do. Besides, he doesn't even _recognize_ me! It's not like he'll even notice I'm gone!" As he said the words he could hear the pain and bitterness in his own voice, something deep in his chest tightening to the point he found it hard to breathe.

And herein lay the true reason he had fled the lair. As hard as he had been trying not to think about it, he couldn't escape the truth that though Leo had miraculously returned home…he really hadn't.

"He doesn't _know_ me," he whispered, the anger slipping from his voice to be replaced with something very much like despair. "And Donnie says he won't ever get his memories back. I just…I can't…" he trailed off, unable to finish past the lump in his throat.

He remembered again all the times he had sat alone in his room, begging with fate to bring his brother back, all the while knowing it was impossible. But then the impossible had happened, and for a single, joyous moment he had allowed himself to believe that his family might be whole again once more, that the jagged hole left in his heart might finally be able to heal.

Then he'd seen Leo, and nothing, not even Mikey's earlier warning had prepared him for the complete lack of recognition in his brother's eyes. It had been Leo's body standing right in front of him, but in some strangely absurd way he had felt like he was looking at a stranger. The whole thing had thrown him completely off balance, and he hadn't known _how_ to react. How to _feel._ But deep down he'd still had hope. Hope that his brother was still there somewhere, buried deep beneath the empty gaze of those painfully familiar blue eyes.

But that hope was gone now, and Raph felt broken all over again, as though he had lost Leo for a second time. He couldn't help but feel like fate was toying with him, mocking him with how close he had come to getting back everything he had lost, only to have it snatched away once more. It drove home all over again just how much he missed his brother; the long winded lectures, the well-thought out plans and strategies, the selfless bravery, the bold confidence…all of it. Everything that had made Leo who he was…

Gone.

"It won't ever be the same." He whispered, the truth behind the words threatening to crush him beneath a heavy blanket of despair. He couldn't even bring himself to look at Casey, and a long silence stretched between them.

Finally Casey spoke. "When I was ten and my mom was still alive, we lost our family home to a fire." He started quietly. "I can't even remember what caused it, but by the time the firefighters got the blaze out, the whole house was gone. We lost everything. All my toys, all my clothes, all my awesome GI Joe action figures and the baseball cards my grandpa had given me…" he trailed off, his gaze fixed somewhere in the distance.

"I was devastated," he continued a moment later, his voice soft and distant, caught up in long ago memories. "I remember hiding in this cement culvert near my aunt's house and just crying my eyes out. I remember feeling like my whole world was gone forever."

He paused, shrugging one shoulder and turning to glance over at Raph. "But then my mom found me, and I'll never forget what she said. She told me that it was okay to cry for what was lost, but I should also look forward to what was to come. We would build a new house, and I would get new clothes, new toys, and even a brand new room. It wouldn't be the same, but that didn't mean it wouldn't still be good."

Casey fell silent, and Raph let out a soft grunt. "Leo aint no freaking house, Case!" he growled, not sure exactly where his friend was going with all this.

Casey turned to look at him, something fierce shining deep in his brown eyes. "Maybe not, but it's still the same," he replied firmly. "You've lost something precious, and it hurts like hell. I'm not denying that. But now you have the chance to rebuild. You just have to learn to be okay with the fact that it might look a little different than it did before. At least you're all together. And in the end, it's still Leo. Memories or no, he's still your brother!"

Raph stared at Casey, taken somewhat aback by the heated passion in his friend's voice. He wasn't quite sure what to say in response. He understood what Casey was trying to say, he just wasn't quite sure how he felt about it. How did one just let go of their previous life and start building a new one? Casey made it sound so easy, but Raph knew for a fact it wasn't.

As if reading his thoughts, Casey said simply, "Look, I'm not saying you can't grieve for what's been lost. Just don't let that grief blind you to what you still have. Remember, this will be hard for Leo too. If he even suspects for a minute that he's not welcome…"

"He won't!" Raph cut his friend off mid-sentence, his voice ringing with conviction. "Ever!"

He drained the rest of his coke in a single swallow and lowered the bottle to the ground next to him, his gaze lost somewhere in the darkness in front of him as he considered Casey's words. He knew his friend was right. He had been so focused on what had been lost, he had allowed it to rob him of the joy of all that had been gained. The pain was still there, along with the grief, and there was no sense in denying it. But for the first time he allowed himself to look ahead to the possible future with a new sense of hope. Things would be strange for a while, but Leo would eventually get used to them, and then they could all start working together to become a family once more. But the only way that could happen was if Raph was able to let go of the past. Just as Casey had said, he would have to learn to be okay with the fact that Leo was different now.

But at least his brother was alive. At least he was home.

That realization struck Raph all over again, and suddenly he wasn't at all sure what he was doing out here. With a surge of renewed energy, he found himself standing to his feet, pausing only long enough to glance down at Casey. "Thanks Jones." He murmured. "For everything."

Casey grinned up at him, lifting his coke bottle in a small salute. "Go home, Raph," was all he replied, and Raph didn't need to be told twice.

* * *

The lair was quiet, the soft tick of the clock above the TV the only sound breaking the silence.

Blade lay on the couch, his body held perfectly still as his eyes tracked the second hand in its endless journey around the clock face. His mind distantly registered the time, but the knowledge meant nothing to him. He had no way of knowing how many hours, or possibly days now, he had been in this place. Time had lost all meaning for him as he had drifted on an endless sea of pain and suffering.

But something had recently changed. Almost as quickly as it had come, the ferocious attack on his body had eased, leaving him aching and exhausted, but alive and coherent. He was almost afraid to move lest he reawaken the pain, but as the slow minutes dragged on without a single growl from the beast in his belly he began to hope that it all was truly over.

Moving his gaze from the clock, he glanced toward the large easy chair where Raph currently sat slumped, the haphazard sprawl of his limbs making it look as though he were a puppet who'd had his strings cut. His eyes were closed and his chin rested on his chest, the cup of coffee held in one hand in imminent danger of slipping from his lax fingers. Everything about his posture spoke of utter exhaustion, of a battle for consciousness gallantly fought but ultimately lost.

Watching him, Blade couldn't help but feel a flash of guilt, knowing he was at least partially to blame for the other's exhaustion. He also felt no small amount of envy, wishing his own body would give in to the call for some desperately needed sleep. Even without his memories, he would lay wager that he had never been so tired before in his entire life. He'd had some long days and late nights with the wolf pack, but nothing that even remotely compared to this. He hadn't known it was _possible_ to be this exhausted.

He was also thirsty. Extremely thirsty.

The cup in Raph's hand seemed to taunt him, making the dryness in his mouth and the burn in his throat seem that much worse. He vaguely recalled Donnie offering him sips of cool water throughout his illness, but he'd never been able to keep the liquid down for more than a few minutes. Which probably explained the IV line currently taped to the crook of his elbow and the empty bag of saline solution hanging from a metal stand behind the couch. At least he knew he didn't need to worry about becoming dehydrated, but the IV did nothing for the parched feeling in his mouth and throat, not to mention the sour aftertaste that still lingered on the back of his tongue.

With nothing else to occupy his mind, he found himself obsessing over his thirst, so much so that he briefly considered getting up and going in search of something to drink. The only problem with that was the whole "getting up" part. He was desperate enough he briefly considered trying to wake Raph, but somehow the idea of disturbing the red banded turtle when he was so clearly exhausted seemed cruel. He'd been enough of a burden to this family as it was.

He was just resigning himself to the fact that he would have to remain thirsty when he felt a soft hand come to rest on his shoulder. If he'd been feeling better he probably would have jumped in surprise, but his weary body barely even reacted, his head rolling slowly to the side so he could peer blearily up at the tall brown form standing over him.

Splinter smiled down at him gently, the back of his hand smoothing softly across Blade's brow in a gesture that was far more comforting than it should have been coming from a practical stranger. "You are feeling better my son?"

It felt strange, hearing such an intimate term of endearment from the mutant rat, but Blade found himself responding anyway, nodding his head slightly.

"Yes sir," he croaked, frowning at how weak and hoarse his voice sounded.

Splinter shook his head slightly, the gentle smile never leaving his face. "Please, call me Splinter. Or Sensei if you prefer."

Blade nodded but did not speak, his gaze drinking in the furry features above him, hoping for some stirring of recognition, disappointed when he found none. Even so, there was something about the old rat that put him at ease. The fear and doubt he had felt upon first entering this underground home were strangely absent, his remaining uncertainty stemming more from shyness than any sense of lingering apprehension. If this family had wanted to hurt him, they'd had more than ample time and opportunity to do so, but instead they had cared for him with a gentleness and compassion he had not been expecting. As mortified as he was to show such weakness in front of them, he found he was also grateful for their presence.

As if in punctuation to his thoughts Raph let out a small grunt, shifting in his chair slightly, the grip he had on his cup loosening even more.

Splinter let out a soft sigh and swiftly moved around the couch toward the chair, reaching out and carefully rescuing the mug from Raph's limp fingers. The red turtle stirred slightly, his brow furrowing, but Splinter murmured something softly to him in Japanese, running his hand across Raph's brow in much the same way he had just done with Blade. Raph instantly relaxed back into the chair, his breathing deepening as he slipped further into sleep.

"Do you think you can handle something to drink?" Splinter asked softly, straightening from the chair and glancing back over at Blade.

Blade nodded eagerly, swallowing hard as the dryness in his throat once again clamored for his immediate attention.

Splinter nodded, his dark eyes glinting in silent understanding as he turned and walked away, murmuring a soft "I'll be right back" as he passed the couch.

Blade relaxed back into the soft cushions, releasing a sigh as he allowed his eyes to wander around the room. Everything looked so strange and new to him, it was hard to wrap his mind around the fact that at one time he had called this place home. He wondered how many times he had sat on this very couch, watching TV with his family, unaware that someday it would all be taken from him. He couldn't deny the heavy sense of loss that filled him at the thought.

Would he one day call this place home again? Or was that just wishful thinking that he should banish now, before it could hurt him. Donnie had said he didn't think Blade would regain his memories, which meant there was a very real possibility the turtles wouldn't want him around. They had shown him nothing but kindness so far, but maybe it was out of a sense of obligation and nothing more. He had to prepare himself for the chance that once he had recovered sufficiently they might ask him to leave.

The possibility of this hurt more than it should have. In just the short time he had known this family he had sensed the warm bond that held them all together. He supposed it was only natural to feel a longing to belong to something like that, to experience the close comradery and concern for one another that this family obviously shared. He had hoped he might one day experience it with the wolf pack, but if he was honest with himself he knew he would have never found the same kind of acceptance and love he had only briefly glimpsed here. Which was why the thought of losing it was so incredibly painful.

Before he could dwell on it too long, Splinter returned carrying a tray with two mugs on it. Placing the tray on the small table at the end of the couch, he crouched in front of Blade, one hand reaching out to rest gently on his shoulder.

"Would it be alright if I lift you?" he asked politely.

Blade blinked in surprise, then felt a wash of warmth flow through him at the small but obvious effort to make him feel more comfortable. He nodded, even as he began to try and push himself up on one elbow so Splinter wouldn't have to do all the work. He was immediately dismayed by how weak he was, but the rat's furry hands closed around his shoulders and with a strength belied by his frail appearance, hauled him into a sitting position.

Blade had to close his eyes as the sudden change in position caused his head to spin and his sore muscles to protest. He hissed out a deep breath between tightly clenched teeth, preparing for the nausea and cramps to return. When several second passed and nothing happened, he allowed himself to relax slightly, sinking back into the soft support of the cushions behind him.

He opened his eyes again to find Splinter standing before him, patiently waiting for him collect himself before holding out one of the mugs. He couldn't help but reach for it eagerly, mindful of the IV still attached to his elbow. He was relieved when his hands only shook a little, and Splinter surrendered the mug to him without a fuss, perhaps sensing his need for a little independence.

Blade lifted the drink to his lips eagerly, taking a large swallow before the faint scent of tea leaves had a chance to register in his brain. For some reason he had been expecting water, so when the warm tea slid down his throat he almost choked in surprise. Then the warmth and the taste registered, and he found himself moaning slightly in pure bliss as he raised the cup and took another deep swallow. The warmth of the tea was soothing to his raw throat, and the taste—smooth with a slight mint flavor—delighted his taste buds and left his mouth feeling cool and fresh.

A small chuckle had him glancing up toward Splinter, and he found the rat watching him with a look of fond amusement on his furry face. "I thought you might like that," Splinter murmured softly. "It's your favorite tea. Many a morning I have watched you drink it with precisely that same reaction."

Blade ducked his head, unsure how he should reply. Splinter's expression had been amused, but there was no missing the hint of sadness in his voice as well. He suddenly had the strong urge to say something to cheer the old rat up, but he really had no idea what that might be, so he took another deep swallow of the tea instead.

A moment later he felt the couch cushions shift as Splinter sat down beside him, his own mug of tea held in one clawed hand. "I saw this in the kitchen and thought you might like to see it," he announced, pulling a small wooden picture frame from a pocket in the folds of his robes and handing it over.

Blade took the picture hesitantly, his heart beginning to beat faster in his chest as he looked down at the scene forever frozen beneath the small square of glass. The picture was obviously taken in the kitchen, and captured a moment of culinary chaos as four brothers worked together to make what appeared to be a giant pizza. Donnie was standing to the left of the table, caught in mid-act of tossing up a ring of dough, a look of intense concentration on his face. Behind him Raph sat cross-legged on the counter, a black olive speared on the tip of one of his sais, his jaws spread wide open as he prepared to pop the small treat into his mouth. Mikey was to the right of the table, a wide grin on his face as he held up a bag of brightly colored jellybeans. And there, surveying the whole scene from his position at the head of the table, a dash of flour across one cheek, stood Leo.

Blade felt his breath catch in his throat as he stared down at the small picture, drinking in every detail as greedily as he had just drank his tea. Of all of them, Leo was the only one staring directly at the camera, and Blade couldn't tear his gaze away from those bright blue eyes. They were _his_ eyes, and yet at the same time they weren't. There was something bright and happy in those eyes, a contentment and serenity that Blade couldn't really relate to. There was something about the picture that seemed to radiate warmth and friendship and family, and Blade felt a burning lump form in the back of his throat.

With an effort he tore his gaze away from the picture and looked over at Splinter, unsurprised to find the rat watching him intently, as though eager for his reaction. "This was taken last year," Splinter explained quietly. "On the day we had chosen to celebrate your birthday."

Blade swallowed and looked back down at the scene, his eyes thoroughly taking in each brother one at a time before finally coming to stop on the figure in the middle.

"I don't know him," he admitted softly, staring down at the tiny figure in the picture, the disappointment in his voice unmistakable.

"Perhaps not now," Splinter replied evenly, his voice soft with understanding. "But who knows what the future will bring."

Blade frowned, looking up at Splinter and shaking his head. "But Donnie said…" he began, only to cut off when Splinter raised a single furry paw.

"Donatello is a genius, with knowledge far beyond his years, but that does not mean he knows everything," Splinter stated solemnly, "Nor does it mean that he has never been wrong before. Do not be too quick to abandon all hope, my son. There is much about the way the mind works that we do not understand, therefore cannot predict. I have faith that all will be made well again, one way or another."

Blade dropped his gaze, his hands idly fiddling with the edges of the wooden picture frame. He wanted to believe that Splinter was right…that there might still be some hope, but he didn't want to set himself up for disappointment either. Wouldn't it be better to accept now that Leo was gone forever, rather than cling to some flimsy hope?

He looked back up, forcing himself to meet Splinter's gaze, knowing what he asked next might be difficult for the old rat, but needing to know. "Would you…would you tell me about him?" he asked timidly, his gaze flickering down to the bright eyed turtle in the picture. "Please?"

Splinter looked startled for a moment, but then he smiled, his dark eyes shining softly with some deep emotion that Blade couldn't even begin to decipher. He shifted his cup in his hands, his expression turning thoughtful before he finally spoke.

"Leo was always a quiet child…"

TBC

_Hope you liked it. As always, I look forward to hearing your thoughts…_


	18. Chapter 18

_Yikes! I realize that it has been two months since my last update. I am SO sorry. Between the holidays and a nasty bout of pneumonia, I just haven't been able to write as often as I would have liked. For those of you who are still around, thank you for your patience._

The low whistle of the tea pot echoed through the quiet kitchen, and Donnie jumped up from his seat at the table to hurry over to the stove. He removed the pot from the burner, ending the mournful moan coming from the spout, and the lair was once more plunged into silence. The quiet was something that had become all too familiar over the last day or so. There was an expectant hush to the air that had everyone walking around on tiptoes and speaking in near whispers.

With practiced hands Donnie quickly prepared a cup of Leo's favorite tea, then on impulse, a second one for himself. He didn't bother making more than two. Mikey and Raph both hated hot tea, and Splinter was still resting in his room after spending most of the night up with Leo.

Holding both mugs carefully by their handles Donnie made his way out into the silent living room. As he rounded the end of the couch, Mikey looked up at him from his spot on the chair, offering a slight shrug of his shoulders and an apologetic nod in the direction of the couch. Donnie turned his gaze downward, unsurprised to find Leo fast asleep across the couch, his head cushioned on one elbow.

Over the last twenty four hours the drug in Leo's system had slowly relinquished its hold on the oldest turtle. The sickness had been the first to fade, and shortly afterward Leo had finally been able to sleep. Unfortunately it wasn't the deep and restful sleep he so desperately needed, but rather short catnaps here and there that did little to relieve his obvious exhaustion. Donnie was confident the lingering effects of the drug would eventually fade completely and his brother would be able to sleep normally once more, but for now they would have to take whatever they could get.

Carefully setting the mugs on the end table, Donnie sank down onto the arm of the couch at Leo's feet, observing his sleeping brother with a critical eye. Leo's color was slightly better than it had been, and the occasional muscle spasms that had plagued him through much of the night seemed to have finally subsided. He seemed to be resting peacefully and pain free, for which Donnie was extremely grateful.

He had felt so incredibly helpless while his brother had battled through the withdrawal systems. He'd had no way to ease Leo's pain, and for someone who prided themselves on fixing things, the whole situation had been pure torture. He hoped to never go through anything like that again for as long as he lived.

But now that Leo seemed to be out of immediate danger, Donnie felt his thoughts shift to new concerns, and they all revolved around his brother's loss of memory. A part of him wanted to just push the worry aside and enjoy the wonderful knowledge that their brother was alive and home, but his mind didn't work like that. He knew his family would be looking to him for answers and guidance in the coming days, and he didn't want to let them down.

Unfortunately, he really had no idea where to go from here. There were no instruction manuals or "how to" books on dealing with a brother who had lost all memory. Everything from here on out would be experimentation and trial and error, and for the first time in a very long time Donnie found himself adrift in a foreign world of uncertainty and doubt.

"We'll just have to take everything one day at a time," Splinter had assured him softly right before retiring to his room. It was good advice, but it didn't stop Donnie from worrying and wondering.

Would it be best to treat Leo exactly as they had before, as though nothing had changed? Or should they give him room, handle him with kid gloves so to speak, until he grew more used to them? The first option had the possibility of overwhelming their brother, while the second had the possibility of alienating him. Donnie wasn't sure which path they should take. He wanted Leo to feel comfortable and at home, but there was no way his brother would miss the inevitable awkwardness as they each tried to figure out the best way to act around him.

It was all just so overwhelming. His mind kept screaming at him to DO something, but he wasn't at all sure there was anything he _could_ do. He wanted a way to fix what had been broken, a way to restore his brother's memories, but that wasn't looking likely. As hard as it was to accept, Donnie had been over Stockman's notes enough times to know the scientist had fully expected his drug to be a permanent solution. Perhaps if the notes had revealed the chemical formula Stockman had used to create the drug Donnie would have more information to work with, but unfortunately all they did was refer to a second set of indexed notes that were not included in the files he had managed to retrieve from the lab. Which meant all he could do was wait and hope for the best.

Their family had already been given one miracle with Leo's return. He couldn't help but feel like it was too much to hope for a second one.

The sharp ring of the lair phone jerked him out of his thoughts, and he hurriedly jumped to his feet, waving Mikey back down with one hand as he raced across the room to the phone. He managed to snag it just after the second ring, pulling the receiver to his ear and grunting out a quick "Hello?"

"_Hi Donnie_." April's warm voice greeted him softly. "_I hope I'm not calling at a bad time?"_

"Hey April," he replied quietly, glancing over at the couch before slipping around the corner into the kitchen where he could talk more freely without fear of waking his brother up. "You're fine. Leo's resting, but other than that there's not a whole lot going on."

"_How's he doing?_" April asked, obvious concern in her voice.

Donnie shrugged even though he knew April couldn't see him. "He's doing much better than he was yesterday. Still pretty weak and tired, but I think we're over the worst of it."

April's soft sigh of relief carried through the line clearly. "_Oh, that's good."_ There was a pause, and Donnie knew what was coming next before April even spoke. "_When do you think we might be able to come down and see him_?"

Donnie let out his own sigh, leaning his head back against the kitchen wall. "I don't know, April," he began wearily. "Things are still pretty new and strange to him, and I don't want…"

"_I _need_ to see him, Donnie_!" April interrupted. "_I've been slowly going crazy up here over the last couple of days! He's like a brother to me, and even if he doesn't recognize me, _I _still need to see him_."

There was no denying the note of desperation in April's voice, and Donnie couldn't help but cringe in silent guilt. He knew it wasn't fair to keep April and Casey away, but at the same time the last thing he wanted to do was overwhelm his brother when Leo was still getting used to everything. He was trying to do what was best for his brother, but at the same time he knew he was hurting his friends. It was just so hard to know what the right thing to do was. It was in moments like these that he had always gone to Leo for advice, and the absence of that calm and reassuring presence left an ache of loss in his chest despite the fact that Leo was less than 20 feet away.

"I know, April," he replied after a moment, running a tired hand down across his face. "Maybe…maybe you could come by sometime tomorrow night?" He suggested slowly, hoping he was making the right choice.

"_Tomorrow? That's sounds great, Donnie. Thank you! We can bring some groceries down with us when we come, and maybe some pizza. I promise we won't stay long, and we'll give Leo plenty of room, but it will be so good to see him!_

Donnie smiled softly as the happiness in April's voice warmed something deep within him, and he knew he had made the right choice. Leo would need to meet their human friends eventually, might as well get it over with sooner rather than later. "You're welcome, April." He replied lightly. "Just…don't expect too much from him, okay?"

"_You know I won't_," April replied, her voice once more calm and collected. "_We'll just stop by and say hello, and then if you need us to leave we can go_."

"Sounds good," Donnie murmured. "Maybe if things go well enough we can all watch a movie together sometime soon."

As he said the words his mind filled with the mental image of them all gathered together in the living room, laughing together and sharing snacks as they had done so many times in the past. The mental image was at once both exciting and painful, and Donnie couldn't help but wonder if he was grasping at the elusive illusion of normalcy when in truth, "normal" wasn't really the same for them anymore and probably never would be.

"_That would be nice_," April answered softly, the slight wistful tone of her voice telling Donnie that she was feeling just the same as he was. "_Bye Donnie, I'll see you tomorrow_."

"Bye," Donnie grunted, then slipped back around the corner to hang up the phone.

When he re-entered the living room he found all three of his brothers there, Leo having obviously just awoken. Mikey had moved from his chair over to the couch and was unobtrusively lending his weakened big brother a steadying shoulder to lean on as he offered Leo the cup of tea Donnie had prepared. Raph was sitting in Mikey's vacated chair, his attention split between his brothers on the couch and the _Motorcycle Monthly_ magazine he held loosely open on his lap.

"Hey," Donnie greeted softly, stepping fully into the room and addressing his oldest brother. "How are you feeling?"

Leo glanced up at him over his mug of tea, his eyes shadowed and tired, but no longer full of the wary distrust they had held back in the beginning. "A little tired, but okay," he rasped, his voice still slightly hoarse from his hours of sickness. "Thanks for the tea. It tastes wonderful."

From his position on the far side of the couch Mikey let out a disgusted sound. "I honestly don't see what you guys like about that stuff," he stated with an exaggerated shudder. "It tastes like grass mixed with dirt if you ask me."

"Agreed," Raph grunted from his position in the chair.

Donnie sighed, sinking down onto the couch on the other side of Leo. "You guys just need to develop a more sophisticated pallet," he retorted, picking up his own cup of tea and taking a deep swallow, noting happily that it was still warm.

"Yeah, whatever," Mikey and Raph echoed at the same time.

Leo watched the entire exchange silently, his wide eyes flickering from first one face to another, as though he were attempting to drink in as much information as he could from every word spoken. Donnie knew Splinter had spent much of the night telling Leo stories of their past, which was probably the reason his older brother seemed more comfortable in their presence now. It was a good sign, and Donnie made a mental note to expand on his father's work whenever possible to help Leo get to know them—and himself—again. Only then would his brother feel more comfortable and at home.

"So…uh…Leo?" He began hesitantly, deciding now was as good a time as any to warn his brother about their upcoming company. "We have a couple of friends that have been dying to come down and see you…and well…I sorta told them they could stop by tomorrow night. Only if you feel up to it, of course," he added quickly, seeing the way Leo froze with his cup halfway to his mouth.

Leo's brow furrowed slightly, his blue eyes flashing with uncertainty. "These friends…" he began hesitantly, "they are…human?"

"Yep," Mikey replied cheerfully before Donnie had a chance. "But don't hold that against them. They're still awesome! You'll like them. April's super smart and super pretty, and Casey's kinda a bad ass, but in a good way, like Raph. They're family."

Leo arched a surprised eye at that last, but he gave a slow nod of his head. "Are they part of your gang?" he asked softly, directing the question to Donnie.

Donnie blinked, not quite sure what to make of the question. "No," he replied slowly, "they're just friends. We don't have a gang," he added with a shrug. "It's just us."

"Oh," Leo muttered, frowning as he dropped his gaze down to his lap.

"Why would you think we were part of a gang?" Raph asked, watching Leo with curious green eyes.

Their brother gave a small shrug. "Some of the guys in the wolf gang seemed to think you were part of a rival gang," he explained softly, "and that's why you kept busting up our raids."

Donnie frowned, sharing a quick glance with Raph and Mikey. None of them had missed the way Leo said "our raids," and Donnie felt a sinking sensation deep in the pit of his stomach. He didn't like the idea of Leo associating himself with the wolf gang one bit, but the truth was, his brother _had_ been living with them for the past six months. It only stood to reason that they would have involved him in at least some of their illegal activities.

Still, the thought of Leo as part of a gang was so fundamentally _wrong,_ Donnie could hardly wrap his mind around it. It was like learning that Casey was a crossdresser, or April stole candy from small children; it just didn't make any sense. Leo had always carried the concept of honor and integrity to a whole new level, despising the low life thugs who preyed on the weak and helpless with a passion bordering on hatred. The thought that his brother had lost himself to the point of becoming the very thing he so despised left Donnie feeling physically ill.

"No Leo," Raph replied slowly, his voice uncharacteristically subdued, telling Donnie that his brother was thinking along the same lines as him. "We didn't try and stop the wolf gang from robbing those warehouses because we wanted them for ourselves. We did it because what they were doing was wrong. They were stealing, and we had to stop them."

Leo shook his head, his forehead creasing in obvious confusion. "But why?" he asked slowly. "It wasn't _your_ warehouses they were stealing from. Why get involved?"

Donnie swallowed hard, seeing his own dismay mirrored on the faces of Raph and Mikey. It was one thing to know in your head that your brother had changed, and another thing entirely to have the proof of that change displayed in such an obvious and distressing manner. Leo had always been the biggest proponent of their chosen lifestyle, insisting that what they were doing was not only honorable, but also necessary. Now it seemed he was the one needing convincing, and Donnie could only hope he came across half as convincing as his older brother always had.

"We get involved because it's the right thing to do," he finally answered, choosing his words carefully, wanting Leo to understand, but not wanting to come across as judgmental or accusatory. "We've seen a lot of things over the years. New York is an amazing and wonderful city, but it has a dark side to it as well. We've seen people rob and hurt others all for a couple of bucks or a cheap watch. We've seen bullies attack those weaker then themselves just to show off their strength. We've seen women terrorized and beaten for no good reason at all. We've seen property destroyed and lives ruined, all because someone gets it into their head that they have to have something that is not theirs."

He paused, Leo's gaze resting heavy on him as he thought about his next words. "I know it might not seem like it makes a lot of sense to risk our lives getting involved in something that doesn't directly concern us, but after seeing all that darkness, we found we couldn't just stand by and do nothing. We made a commitment to do something about it, to help those too weak to help themselves and to stop those who would hurt or extort others. No one asked us to do it, and it's often a thankless job, but we took it on anyway. I guess you can say it's our calling, a way to use the skills Master Splinter taught us to make the world around us a better place. To make a difference."

The crease in Leo's forehead deepened as he frowned, but he didn't look upset, merely curious. "If you don't steal, how is it that you survive?" he asked quietly. "It's not like you can go out and earn a living in the human world."

"No we can't," Donnie answered simply, "but we've always found a way despite that, and we've done it without stealing. I'm not going to say it wasn't hard at times, though things have definitely gotten easier since we met April and Casey. But even in the hardest of times Master Splinter always insisted we make our own way. Stealing wouldn't be honorable, and honor is very important to him…to all of us. Without honor, we are little more than the animals we resemble."

Leo looked thoughtful, sinking back against the couch cushions, his gaze turning distant. Donnie didn't press, giving his brother a chance to process what he had told him. Losing your memory was one thing, losing the very essence of who you once were was something else entirely. He could only hope there was enough of the old Leo remaining to understand what he was trying to say. If not, their brother was even more lost to them then he had first thought.

"I never liked the stealing," Blade suddenly admitted, his words sending a flash of hope burning brightly through Donnie's chest. "I guess I always knew it was wrong. But Alpha was pretty convincing in his speeches about doing what we had to do in order to survive. And what else was I supposed to do? I owed the pack my life."

There was something in Leo's voice, a note of despair and defeat that caused Donnie's heart to ache for his brother.

"It's not your fault, Leo," Mikey spoke up quickly, his normally cheerful expression morphing into something hard and defensive. "The wolves took advantage of the fact you couldn't remember anything. They _used_ you bro!"

Leo quickly shook his head, glancing up at them with a helpless expression. "It wasn't like that," he said hurriedly. "I mean…not entirely. They took care of me and gave me a place to stay when they could have just as easily cast me out. Or just left me to die in the first place. It's only natural that they expected me to carry my own weight."

"Only natural?" Raph growled, his voice tight with suppressed emotions. "Mikey told us what happened at the warehouse, and we've all seen the bruises, Leo. It doesn't take a genius to figure out how they treated you. They drugged you, threatened you, and almost killed you…and yet you somehow still think you owe them!?"

Leo frowned, obviously unsure how to interpret Raph's apparent anger. "They saved me," he repeated, his voice soft but firm, as though those three little words explained everything…as though they dismissed what had been done to him.

Donnie saw Raph flinch, something dark and wounded rising up in his eyes, and he knew he needed to quickly steer the conversation in a different direction; for the sake of _both_ his big brothers. He didn't like the idea of Leo suffering at the hands of the wolf pack any more than Raph did, but they couldn't change what was already done, and dwelling on it wouldn't help either.

"Why _did_ they save you, anyway?" he asked quickly before Raph could speak and say something he might later regret. "Not that I'm complaining, of course," he added hurriedly, hoping Leo wouldn't get the wrong idea. "They just don't strike me as the good Samaritan type."

Leo gave a slight shrug, looking away from Raph to focus on Donnie. "Alpha was curious about us," he explained simply. "I guess he saw us on the rooftop that night and thought we might be more of Stockman's creations. He sent Viz to trail us so he could find out more about us. That's how they found me down in the sewers after the explosion."

Donnie nodded, the pieces slowly coming together in his mind. As much as he didn't like to think about that night, he couldn't help but picture his brother trapped and injured beneath the giant rock, bravely urging them to leave him behind in order to save Mikey. They never would have been able to free him, but the wolves could. They had been watching the whole time, waiting in the shadows until Donnie and his brothers had gone. If they hadn't left when they did, the wolves probably never would have shown themselves. It was hard to comprehend the fact that by leaving Leo behind, they had likely saved his life. Not that that realization made Donnie feel any better. Anyway he looked at it he had still failed his brother, and it was a guilt he knew he would never fully be free of, even with Leo returned home to them.

"You were hurt." he said, the words half question, half statement.

Leo nodded. "Viz nursed me back to health," he explained. "That's when they started using the sedative on me…to keep me unconscious while my body healed."

Donnie frowned, something about that not sounding quite right to him, but before he could press for more information Raph broke in.

"And once you woke up and they realized you couldn't remember anything, they decided to keep you on as a member of their gang. They'd taken the time to save you, so why let you go to waste, am I right?" There was no mistaking the undercurrent of anger and bitterness in his voice.

Leo looked slightly uncomfortable, but he gave a slow nod. "Once they figured out I knew how to fight they thought I might be useful. I don't think they ever fully trusted me though, except maybe Viz. They didn't let me out of the warehouse very often in any case. And Alpha still wanted his answers about us. I think that's why they took Mikey after the fight at the warehouse. They were hoping he would be able to provide the information I couldn't."

"But he didn't," Raph finished, casting Mikey a proud look. "Which means these wolves are still in the dark about us. That may come in handy in the future."

Leo shifted slightly on the couch, and Donnie could feel a sudden tension radiating from his form. "Do you plan on going after them?" he asked, his voice casual but his gaze sharp.

"Not right away," Donnie answered truthfully. "We just like to be prepared, that's all. Since you broke Mikey out they're going to be looking for us, and not to deliver flowers either. The least they know about us, the better."

"And the _more_ we know about them, the better as well," Raph added, casting a not so subtle look in Leo's direction.

Leo dropped his gaze, looking uncomfortable, and Donnie shot Raph a warning look, shaking his head slightly. He wanted answers just as much as his brother, about the wolves and about the time Leo had spent with them, but he sensed that now was not the time to push. Leo seemed to be slowly growing more comfortable around them, and Donnie didn't want to ruin that by forcing his brother to pick sides. Especially since he couldn't be at all certain what Leo's choice might be. True, he had already betrayed the pack by rescuing Mikey, but it was obvious that he still harbored a sense of obligation toward them, and Donnie wasn't willing to test how deep that commitment might run just yet.

If it had been the old Leo there would be no question, but the truth was their brother was changed. They would have to proceed carefully or risk unintentionally alienating him for good. Patience was the key, and with the stakes so high, it was something they would all have to work on, even Raph.

"Speaking of rescuing me," Mikey suddenly stated, breaking the tension and drawing all eyes to him. "I think I owe you a thanks on that one, bro. So…umm…thanks. I sure wasn't looking forward to being those wolves chew toy."

Leo looked somewhat taken aback, blinking at Mikey in what could only be genuine surprise. "I couldn't just leave you there," he stated, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "They probably would have killed you."

"Which means we owe you double thanks," Donnie interjected, Raph nodding in silent agreement across from him. "We know how much you risked doing what you did, and it couldn't have been easy leaving the only life you remembered, but you did it anyway. So yeah…thanks isn't nearly enough, but I'll say it too. Thanks for bringing Mikey home."

Leo flushed, ducking his head in obvious embarrassment, but a moment later he lifted his gaze, his eyes flickering from Donnie to Raph, before finally settling on Mikey.

"You're welcome," he replied softly.

* * *

Karai stared out the window of her father's office high atop Saki Towers, her unseeing gaze sweeping across the bustling city spread out far below. Her reflection in the glass window stood tall and proud, the expression on her face calm and emotionless, but inside her thoughts were racing.

She had finally found them.

After six months of fruitless searching, she at last had a lead on the mutant wolves Stockman had created for her father. She had honestly thought them long gone, escaped from the city months ago, but a report from one of her spies earlier this morning had changed all that. She had been shocked to learn that the wolves were not only still in the city, but they were building a gang somewhere up in the North Bronx. It seemed almost too incredible to be true, but her spy was one of her most trusted, and she knew he would not have brought her this information without being absolutely certain.

Turning from the window she strode over to her father's desk, lowering herself into the overlarge leather chair and staring at the phone sitting on the polished mahogany surface. Her father was away in Japan for a business deal and had left strict orders that he wasn't to be disturbed unless absolutely necessary. She was fairly certain he would consider the news she had just received as just cause to contact him, but still she did not reach for the phone.

They had not parted on the best of terms. When Saki had left a month ago he had made no effort to hide his disappointment in her for the lack of progress she had made, both in locating the wolves and in dealing with the accursed turtles. His disapproval grated on her, like sand scratching against a sunburn, and she was determined to be free of it.

Finding the mutant wolves shouldn't prove too difficult, now that she had a general idea of where they were hiding. All she needed to do was find a way to draw them out and recapture them, and then her father's plans would finally be back on schedule. Aside from capturing Splinter and the turtles, it was the next best way of winning back his approval.

But she didn't have much time. Saki would be returning next week, which meant she would have to make her move soon. She needed a plan, a way to draw the wolves out from behind their human shields. She knew that wolves tended to be territorial, which meant they were likely to defend the area they had taken as their own if they felt it was threatened. But the Bronx was a big place, and she couldn't risk a full-out assault on her own. The chance of discovery was simply too great. If she wanted to make sure it was done right she would need help, and she knew the perfect person for the job.

Rising from the desk she strode to the door of the office, pulling it open and calling out the name of her personal attendant. "Surani!"

"Mistress!" the attendant hurried forward, bowing low and remaining bent at the waist as he waited for her commands.

"Go and find Hun," she ordered briskly. "Tell him I have a job for him. I want him brought to me before sundown, do you understand?"

"Yes Mistress," Surani replied, straightening from his bow and turning to hurry away down the hall.

Karai watched him go for a moment before turning back into the office and closing the door behind her. She had plans to make. By the time her father returned she would have the wolves…and his approval…firmly back in hand.

* * *

"Would you like a tour?"

Blade blinked up into the eager face of his youngest brother, trying to shake the lingering haze of sleep from his mind. He had just woken up from yet another nap…his fourth, or maybe fifth of the day…and he still felt just as exhausted as when he fell asleep. It was a pattern that was beginning to irritate him, despite Donnie's assurances that it was a good sign.

"A tour?" he muttered dumbly, his tired mind still struggling to fully wake up.

"Of our home," Mikey confirmed, gesturing widely to take in their surroundings.

"Mikey," Donnie spoke up from the nearby chair, setting aside the book he was reading to address his brother. "I'm not sure Leo is up for a tour just yet. Maybe in a few…"

"I would love a tour," Blade broke in, pushing himself up into a sitting position with some effort. He still felt as weak as a newborn kitten, but after more than three days on the couch he was beginning to feel a bit restless as well. His brothers had been great, keeping him company throughout the day, entertaining him with stories of his past when he was awake, and keeping silent vigil when he slept. But he was ready to get up and move around a bit, and a tour of this unique underground home seemed the perfect way to test his strength.

Donnie looked uncertain, but Mikey let out a soft cheer of excitement, pumping one hand up in the air. "Awesome! We'll start with the ground floor and then move upstairs."

Blade nodded his agreement, beginning to struggle to push himself to his feet. Immediately three sets of hands were there to help him, and he had to duck his head to hide the flush of embarrassment he felt at all the attention. He hated his weakness, and the fact that he needed help doing the simplest of things, but at the same time he couldn't deny the warmth that filled him at his families' obvious concern and care.

"Just take it slow and easy, okay?" Donnie urged, hovering at Blade's side as they gave him time to adjust to being upright for the first time in days.

"Slow and easy…check," Blade replied, breathing deeply and evenly until he felt he was ready to proceed. He nodded at Mikey, and his brother flashed him a quick grin before leading the way out of the living room and down a short stone hallway.

Blade followed slowly, his steps slightly hesitant at first as the muscles in his legs were forced into use for the first time since his illness. He ached all over, but he pushed the discomfort aside, simply glad to be up and moving again. Raph and Donnie flanked him on either side, far away enough to give him some space, but near enough to offer support if he should stumble.

A moment later Blade followed Mikey through a wide doorway into a large room with a high, vaulted ceiling. "Welcome to the dojo," Mikey announced theatrically, sweeping one arm out to encompass the massive room before them.

Blade let out a low whistle of appreciation. The dojo was quite impressive, and not only because of its size. It was obvious that much care and attention had been put into the setup and decoration of the room. Thick foam mats covered the floor from corner to corner, and a vast array of weaponry and training equipment lined the walls. One side of the room was taken up by a massive wooden structure that looked like an adult version of a park's jungle gym, complete with monkey bars, climbing poles, and swinging rope ladders. An ornate wooden alter sat serenely at the far end of the room, several Japanese scrolls flanking it on each side.

"It's beautiful,"' Blade breathed, letting his eyes roam the large room, greedily taking in every detail. He wasn't sure why, but he suddenly had the urge to sit down on the thick foam mats, close his eyes, and simply let the warm ambiance of the room wash over him. It was strange that a place obviously used for strenuous physical training would fill him with such an overwhelming sense of calmness and peace.

He turned back to face his brothers, somewhat surprised to find them all watching him intently, almost as though they were waiting for something. He found himself shifting nervously beneath their stare, wondering if there was something he was supposed to say or do. If so, he had no idea what it was.

"I bet you've had tons of fun in here," he finally stated softly.

"We all have," Mikey agreed lightly. "Honestly though, you've probably spent the most time in here out of all of us. You practically lived in here sometimes."

Blade glanced back around him, overwhelmed again by the strange sense of comfort he felt in the room. "I can see why," he replied simply, turning back to Mikey. "It's very nice in here."

Mikey smiled at him, but Blade thought he caught a hint of disappointment in his brother's eyes before the orange turtle turned away, leading the way back down the hallway and calling "follow me" over his shoulder. Feeling like he had somehow let his brother down but not sure how, Blade followed after, Raph and Donnie flanking him faithfully on either side.

Mikey took him to the kitchen next, followed by Donnie's lab and the adjoining medical room. As they walked, Mikey and Donnie kept up a constant running dialogue, pointing out and explaining the significance of one particular item or another. In contrast, Raph was mostly quiet, a silent shadow floating along in their wake. Blade suspected something was bothering his red banded brother, and chances were pretty high that _he_ was the cause of it. He just wasn't sure what he should do about it.

After finishing with the lab, Mikey led them up the stairs to the second level. By the time Blade reached the top landing he was breathing hard and trembling slightly, his entire body weak with exhaustion. He hated to admit it, but he knew he had reached the end of his endurance. Raph and Donnie were eyeing him with concern, and both had stepped in closer as though expecting to have to catch him when he fell.

"Last room, Mikey," Donnie called, reaching out and placing a steadying hand on Blade's shoulder as he began to list slightly to one side. "I think Leo's done for today."

Mikey glanced over his shoulder, his eyes widening in surprise. He quickly nodded, then moved forward to the first door in the hallway, swinging it open before turning and giving Blade a mock bow, sweeping his arm out and adopting a false British accent as he said, "your room awaits, sir."

Despite his exhaustion Blade was filled with curiosity as he stepped forward and peered around the doorway. The room beyond was small but tidy, with a bed and a single desk making up the only furniture inside. The bed was covered with a simple blue blanket and the desk contained a couple of candles and a few books stacked neatly at one end. Aside from that the only other furnishings were a broadsword hung on a hook above the bed and a brightly colored rug in the middle of the stone floor.

"This was my room?" Blade asked, glancing over at Mikey for confirmation.

The orange banded turtle nodded enthusiastically, and Blade noticed that once again all three of his brothers were staring at him with the same air of silent expectation they had shown down in the dojo. A wave of confusion washed through him, replaced almost immediately with sudden understanding.

They were watching him for signs of recognition. Here, in the place that had been most intimately _his_, and down in the dojo, where he apparently had spent most of his time, they were hoping he might somehow remember something. Apparently, despite Donnie's comment to the contrary, his brothers continued to hold on to at least some hope that his memories would return. It was likely the underlying motivation for this whole tour in the first place

Chest tight, Blade turned back and surveyed the room once more. He wished he could say it felt familiar, but that just wasn't the case. He didn't feel any strange affinity or sense of belonging here. To him it was just a room, albeit a much nicer one than the dusty office he had shared with Viz back at the warehouse.

Unable to bring himself to look at his brother's again he stepped forward, walking slowly over to the bed before turning and sinking down on the soft mattress with a weary sigh. He found his eyes drawn to the brightly colored rug in the middle of the floor, intrigued by the gregarious splashes of color in the otherwise stern and reserved room.

"Do you like it?" Mikey asked hesitantly from the door.

Blade forced himself to look up at Mikey and smile, not wanting to see the disappointment in his brothers' faces, but not wanting to give them a false sense of hope either.

"It's a very nice room," he stated softly. Nothing more, nothing less. He could practically see Mikey wilt.

"Why don't you stay here and get some rest?" Donnie suggested quietly, his eyes glinting with silent understanding even as he rested a hand lightly on Mikey's shoulder. "You'll probably sleep better in a real bed than that lumpy old couch anyway."

Blade nodded, relieved he wouldn't have to make the trip back down the stairs. He was beyond exhausted, and all he wanted to do was sink down into the soft mattress and sleep for a week. If only his traitorous body would allow it.

"Thanks for the tour," he murmured softly, offering his brothers a tired smile. "You have a great home here."

Mikey and Donnie exchanged a quick glance, but surprisingly it was Raph who spoke first, finally breaking his long silence. "It's your home too, you know," he stated softly, his voice quiet but earnest.

Blade blinked at him, not sure how to respond, a sudden lump forming in the back of his throat. He thought he should probably say something, but by the time his brain began to work again they were already leaving, slipping silently away into the hallway, leaving the door standing open behind them. Even after they had gone Raph's words seemed to hang in the air of the small room, echoing over and over again inside Blade's head.

'_It's your home too, you know.'_

With a small groan he lay back against the pillow, staring unseeingly up at the gray stone ceiling above him. He had learned so much today…about this family and about the turtle he had once been. He was still trying to process it all, but one thing was certain…he liked Leo a whole lot more than he liked Blade. From what he had heard, Leo had been strong and brave, devoted to his family and filled with honor and integrity. In comparison, Blade was little more than a lost soul, searching desperately for belonging and direction. If he had to choose between the two…? Well, there really was no contest there.

But was it really possible to simply _choose_ who you were going to be? He didn't think so. If so, he wouldn't be feeling like an imposter sneaking his way into a place he did not belong. Still, he found he _wanted_ to belong, so badly that it actually hurt.

He had only been in this place for a very short time, but already he couldn't help but compare it to what he had known before with the wolf pack. There he had been tolerated at best, and treated with open hostility at worse—Viz being the obvious exception to that. He had fought hard to earn the most basic acceptance into the pack, all the while knowing he would never fully belong. He had never felt at home, never felt warm and welcomed, never felt as though he was wanted or needed.

It was different here.

This family was nothing like what he had expected. When he had first learned of their existence he had been filled with a burning anger, despising them for their supposed betrayal, haunted by thoughts of them even as he tried to convince himself he wanted nothing more than to forget they existed. Then he had met Mikey, and everything had gotten turned upside down. He had learned that they were more than just fellow mutants…they were his family. What was more, they hadn't betrayed him, at least not in the way he had been lead to believe. And so he had taken a chance and reached out to them, daring to hope for the best, but honestly expecting the worst. After all, his experiences with the wolf pack had taught him that nothing came easy, least of all acceptance.

But they had surprised him, welcoming him with warmth and excitement. When he had unexpectedly fallen ill, they had cared for him with an intensity that spoke loudly of love and devotion. And even though his loss of memory obviously bothered them, they hadn't shunned him, but instead treated him as the brother and son they had thought lost. Even after learning of his…indiscretions…as part of the wolf pack, they hadn't pushed him away, but instead had defended him. Blade couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by their acceptance of him, and he found himself wondering if his old self…if Leo… had realized exactly how lucky he was, or had he taken all of this for granted?

Closing his eyes he let out a long sigh, his thoughts turning toward the future. He wanted Raph to be right. He wanted to be able to call this place home. And yet he couldn't seem to shake the feeling that he was taking something that didn't belong to him.

And then there was the wolf pack to consider. He still felt guilty for betraying them, though he knew he hadn't really had a choice. Still, it wasn't something that Alpha was likely to simply let go, not to mention Two Toes and Talon. They would eventually come after him, and it was only a matter of time before they found him. He couldn't help but fear that his family would get caught in the crossfires. In the little time he had known them he had already grown to feel a strange protectiveness over them, and the thought that they might get hurt because of him…?

"Leo," he whispered softly, saying the name aloud for the first time. "If there's any part of you still here somewhere, it's time to come back. You're family needs you…. and I don't know what the hell I'm doing."

Silence was his only answer as sleep finally reached out and pulled him back into her soft embrace.

TBC

_Well there you have it folks. The boys are slowly getting reacquainted with one another. More brotherly bonding coming up, and Raph finally gets to get off his chest what's been bothering him. But a storm is brewing on the horizon, and things are going to get complicated. Stay tuned for more and I promise to not make you wait as long. And as always, I would love to hear your thoughts._

_Thanks!_


	19. Chapter 19

_Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews! Thanks also to everyone who followed and favorited this story. It's hard to believe I have almost 100 favorites! There were so many new reviewers this last chapter it totally made my day. You guys really are the greatest!_

_Enjoy..._

Michelangelo was an undeniable optimist.

Always able to see light in even the darkest situations, his irrepressible cheer and positivity was somewhat of a mystery to the rest of his family. Master Splinter called it a gift, but Mikey saw it more as a survival trait than anything else. He _felt _things on a deeper level than most, which made him all the more susceptible to being dragged down by the darkness and unfairness of the life they lived. So he chose instead to focus on the good and not the bad, and there was really nothing more to it than that. It was an attitude he had adopted so thoroughly it had truly become second nature to him, and only once had it failed him completely; the day he had learned of his oldest brother's death.

The weeks following had been the darkest time of Mikey's entire life. He had hidden away in his room for weeks, lost to a despair he was not familiar with. Eventually his family had been able to draw him away from that dark place, but not before it had left a permanent mark on his soul. But Mikey was nothing if not resilient, and the truth was he liked the light far too much to spend too much time dwelling in darkness. Slowly but surely he felt his optimism return, and if he had to work a bit harder at staying positive than he had in the past, it was still an effort that was well worth it to him.

Which is where he found himself now.

Leo had been miraculously returned to them, but without his memories. It was a blessing and a blow all in one, and Mikey knew it would be all too easy to get caught up in all they had lost…in all the ways their brother was different. Instead, he chose to focus on all the ways Leo was still the same. For instance, his brother's love of tea; the way he unconsciously rubbed at his elbow or knee pads when deep in thought; the half grin he used when unsure if he should be amused by something but still was; even the simple way he said their names. These and any number of other small characteristics told Mikey that Leo was still there, different from before, but still Leo nonetheless.

It gave him hope.

Sure, he still felt saddened by the fact that his brother didn't really know him anymore, or remember all the amazing times they'd had together. He still felt the sting of loss whenever he remembered the way things used to be, and realized they might never be that way again. He still missed the bold and confident leader Leo had once been. It still hurt. But in Mikey's mind, the joy of his brother's return far outweighed the pain, and he refused to allow himself to be dragged down.

He also refused to give up.

Donnie might think there was no way to bring Leo's memories back, but until he was presented with indisputable proof, Mikey wasn't going to quit trying. As long as he continually surrounded Leo with familiar things from his past, his brother was bound to remember something eventually. All they needed was one memory…one tiny breakthrough, and then the rest would follow. It was all just a matter of time. At least, that's the way Mikey chose to see it.

Which was why he was so excited about April and Casey's visit later this evening. That, and the fact they were bringing pizza for dinner. He hadn't had pizza in over a week, and his cravings were growing to dangerous proportions. The prospect of his favorite food combined with the possibility of Leo somehow recognizing their friends was enough to fill him with an excited anticipation that was hard to contain. That anticipation transferred into restless energy, which consequently resulted in two brothers just barely holding onto their patience with him.

"Mikey! For the last time, quit jumping over the couch!" Raph snapped, the grip on his magazine tightening to the point the paper was in danger of ripping. "You're going to end up hitting Leo, and then I'm going to have to break your shell."

Expertly landing on the balls of his feet, Mikey refrained from sticking his tongue out at his brother, but just barely. "I haven't come anywhere close to hitting him," he retorted archly. "Have I, Leo?"

Leo glanced up from the bowl of soup Donnie had urged him to eat, giving his head a small shake. "Not getting involved," he answered in a very Leo-like manner, before dropping his gaze back down to his meal.

"Even if you don't hit Leo, you've still come dangerously close to slamming into the end table," Donnie stated, poking his head from around the corner of the kitchen to join in the conversation. "If you break that table again Mikey, I'm going to give the leg to Raph and let him beat you with it."

Mikey shook his head, casting his brother a quick smirk. "He'd have to catch me first," he taunted, "and we all know he's far too slow."

"Alright, that's it!" Raph growled, slamming his magazine down onto the arm of the chair and jumping to his feet. "I'll show you too slow!"

A thrill of excitement ran through Mikey, and he couldn't hold back the grin that split his face from ear to ear. It had been a long time since he had goaded Raph into a chase around the lair, and the prospect of that little bit of returned normalcy felt oh so good right at the moment. He was just preparing to sprint away from his irate sibling when he was stopped short by a single word that held the power to freeze the world over in the dead of summer.

"Yame!"

Mikey hadn't noticed Splinter entering the room, but his commanding voice put an immediate stop to all movement. Even Leo froze with his spoon half way to his mouth, his wide eyes locked on their father's imposing figure. Splinter didn't look angry, but his ears were angled back in a way that indicated he was at least a bit irritated, and unfortunately his gaze was pinned directly on Mikey.

"Michelangelo," he spoke firmly. "If you have so much energy, perhaps your time would best be served in the dojo." His gaze drifted to take in Raphael as well. "In fact, an hour spent training would do you all good. It has been too many days, and with potential new enemies on the horizon, we cannot afford to grow complacent."

"Ai, Sensei," Raph and Mikey chorused obediently, exchanging resigned glances, their argument instantly forgotten in the face of Splinter's serious tone.

"What about Leo, Sensei?" Donnie asked, stepping into the room behind Splinter. "He isn't strong enough to train yet."

Splinter nodded, turning his gaze to their oldest brother on the couch. "You may stay here and make use of the peace and quiet to rest if you'd like, or you may come and observe, the choice is yours."

Leo quickly put his bowl down on the nearby end table. "I would like to watch, if that's okay," he replied eagerly, already pushing himself to his feet, his movements far smoother than they had been only a day ago, but still nowhere near his normal ease and grace.

Splinter smiled and nodded, obviously pleased, then turned and led the way down the hallway, his children falling into place behind him.

Once in the dojo Leo moved off to sit against the far wall to watch while the rest of them knelt in their customary positions in the center of the mats, facing Master Splinter. Mikey was a little afraid Sensei was going to make them start with meditation, but he merely asked them to remain still for a few minutes and try to find their center before they began. This was the part Mikey was the least good at, but he gave it his best effort, picturing his body as an immovable stone with water flowing all around it. By the time he opened his eyes several minutes later he did feel a little calmer.

Due to the fact that they had all received injuries of one sort or another less than a week ago and none of them were at a hundred percent yet, Splinter began training with simple Katas. The familiar forms required little thought to complete, but served to warm up the body in preparation for more strenuous activity.

Once they were all efficiently warmed up, Sensei sent them on a run through their home-made obstacle course. This was Mikey's favorite, his speed and natural athleticism a perfect match for the running, jumping, balancing, and swinging required on the course. Even better, it allowed him an opportunity to release some of his energy in a way that didn't end with him breaking something or Raph pommeling him. At least, not usually.

As he worked on the course, Mikey found his eyes occasionally straying to where Leo sat against a nearby wall watching them. It seemed strange training with Leo present but not working out with them, and he found himself looking forward anxiously to the time when their big brother could join them again. Four months of practices without him were more than enough in Mikey's mind, and he would gladly welcome Leo back, bossy perfectionism and all. He wondered idly if Leo would need to be retaught all his katas, or would his body remember them even when his mind didn't. It would totally suck if he had to start his training all over again, and if he did…

"Focus Michelangelo!"

Sensei's sharp voice brought his mind back to the task at hand just in time for him to avoid what would have probably been a nasty spill from the hanging ropes. As he was fighting to regain his balance Raph swung past him on the right, shooting him a smug look. Mikey sighed, mentally banishing all thoughts of his big brother for the time being so he could complete the course without breaking his neck, or worse, being completely shown up by Raph.

After a few runs on the obstacle course, Sensei paired them up for a little hand-to-hand sparring. Mikey preferred sparring with weapons, but the hand-to-hand could be fun as well, as long as he focused enough to keep from being pinned by the bigger and stronger Raphael, or outsmarted by Donatello. He did fairly well, considering how much was on his mind, and by the time Sensei called a halt an hour later he was only sporting a couple of new bruises and had definitely dished out as much as he had taken.

"Well, what did you think?" he asked Leo breathlessly as soon as Splinter had dismissed them and turned to pay his customary respects at the alter at the far end of the room. "Pretty cool, huh?"

Leo smiled up at him, shaking his head slightly. "It was definitely intense," he replied simply. "Do you guys practice like this often?"

"Almost every day," Donnie replied wearily, moving over to them and tossing a small towel to Mikey who caught it and began wiping the sweat from his face and head. "Although Master Splinter doesn't usually take it so easy on us. This was just a baby practice compared to what we usually do."

Leo let out a low whistle. "You guys are good," he admitted sincerely. "Makes me kinda glad I'm your brother and not an enemy."

"You're really good too, Fearless," Raph grunted, joining them with his own towel thrown around his shoulder. "Wait until you get better and you'll see."

Leo frowned, cocking his head to one side. "Fearless?" he repeated slowly, looking confused.

"It's your nickname," Mikey quickly explained, throwing the towel back over one shoulder. "When Sensei made you our leader Raph started calling you "Fearless Leader", and the name kinda stuck."

Leo looked stunned. "Leader…?" he gasped, his eyes widening. "I was your _leader_?"

Mikey exchanged a quick look with his other brothers. They had been spending almost every waking moment telling Leo stories about their past, but seventeen years of history took some time to get through, and a detail here and there was bound to get forgotten. Whoops, their bad.

"Yeah," Donnie answered softly. "Master Splinter named you our leader when we turned fifteen."

Raph let out a small snort. "Yeah, but trust me, you had the bossy genes _way_ before then."

Leo sank back against the wall, his head shaking slowly from side to side in apparent disbelief. "Does that mean I'm the oldest?" he asked, glancing around at them in wonder.

Donnie shrugged. "Technically we don't really know, any more than we know exactly how old we are. But generally it's been accepted that you're the oldest, then Raph, then me, and then…"

"Me!" Mikey exclaimed, breaking in. "I'm the baby, which is why everyone loves me the most!"

Donnie just rolled his eyes, but Raph went so far as to reach out and smack him on the back of the head. "Ow!" Mikey complained, glaring at his brother. "Is that any way to treat your beloved baby brother?"

Raph opened his mouth, undoubtedly to say something sarcastic, but a distant voice calling out from the main room forestalled him.

"It's April!" Mikey cried, dropping the towel to the ground at his feet and darting for the doorway. He remembered to pause at the edge of the mats, turning to give the room a quick bow. Donnie was offering Leo a hand up, while across the room Splinter rose from his position in front of the alter. Mikey didn't bothering waiting for them, turning and racing down the hallway to the main room, the delicious scent of pizza greeting him as he entered, sending his drool glands into overdrive.

"Mikey!" April cried, leaving Casey holding a stack of pizza boxes by the door as she hurried forward to throw her arms around his neck. "I'm so glad you're okay. I was worried sick when the guys told me you'd been taken."

Mikey grinned, returning April's hug and trying not to sneeze as her thick red hair tickled across the front of his snout. "No worries, Ape," he replied easily. "You know nobody can keep the Mikester down for long."

April shook her head, releasing him and taking a step back, a smile lighting up her beautiful face. "You're sweaty," she commented, wiping her hands on the sides of her jeans.

Mikey gave her a chagrined smile, shrugging his shoulders. "Sorry. Impromptu training session," he explained easily. "Nothing like a nice workout to build up ones' appetite."

April laughed lightly, shaking her head. "As if you need help in that particular area," she teased. "And before you ask, yes, we brought extra." Her gaze drifted over his shoulder and Mikey saw her suddenly stiffen, her eyes widening slightly and one hand coming up to cover her mouth, a soft "oh" escaping from between her fingers.

Mikey turned to find the remainder of his family walking down the hall towards them, Leo in the middle, his expression neutral but a slightly wary look in his eyes. As they approached Donnie leaned over and whispered something in Leo's ear, earning a small nod from the oldest turtle, his gaze still fixed on April where she stood next to Mikey.

"Hey April, hey Casey," Raph called out, breaking the silence as the whole group came to a halt a few steps away. "Pizza smells delicious."

"Hey," April replied automatically, dropping her hand from her mouth, her greeting echoed by Casey who was still standing by the door, watching the whole scene unfold with a steady gaze.

"Leo, these are our friends, April and Casey," Donnie introduced, his voice calm and even.

"It…it's good to see you Leo," April whispered, and Mikey could tell that it was taking all of her willpower not to rush forward and embrace Leo the way she had just done with him. "I'm so, so very glad you're home."

Leo gave a small nod, his gaze flickering over to Casey before returning to April. "Thank you," he replied politely. "It's…umm…nice to meet you," he added, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"Good to see you too, buddy," Casey called, shifting the pizza into one hand and offering a somewhat awkward wave. "Thanks for letting us come down and visit."

Mikey watched Leo's face intently, searching hopefully for any flicker of recognition, but his brother's expression remained distant and neutral. As if sensing his gaze, Leo's eyes flickered over to meet his, and his brother gave the slightest shake of his head.

A wave of disappointment washed through Mikey, but with an effort he pushed it away. '_Next time_,' he told himself silently. '_He'll remember next time_.'

And until then…?

Well, at least he still had pizza.

* * *

The pizza was delicious, but April hardly noticed.

She couldn't keep her eyes off Leo. She tried, she really did. Before coming she had lectured Casey about not doing anything to make Leo feel uncomfortable, but now she was having trouble following her own instructions. Casey, on the other hand, was acting as natural as she had ever seen him, laughing and joking and generally behaving as though nothing had ever happened. Figures.

She tried to follow Casey's lead, but it was like her eyes had a mind of their own, and every time she blinked she would be staring across the table at Leo again. She really shouldn't be acting like this. After all, she'd had several days to get used to the fact that he was alive. Still, knowing something in your head was very different than witnessing it with your own eyes.

He looked good.

After listening to Donnie's reports on the phone she had half expected to find a quivering mess on the couch. Imagine her surprise when she arrived to find him up and about and looking fairly healthy. He was eating soup while the rest of them had pizza, a sign that his system was still not back to normal, and he looked tired—more than tired—a slight hesitation to his movements that had never been there before, but his color was good and his eyes bright and aware.

For the hundredth time that night April had to clamp down on the urge to get up and walk around the table so she could enfold him in a tight hug. '_Yeah, _that_ wouldn't make him feel uncomfortable at all_,' she thought sarcastically. Still, she had missed him _so_ much. It broke her heart that he couldn't remember her. She could still clearly remember the last time she had seen him and the tight hug he had given her while assuring her everything would be alright. Oh how she wanted to believe that his words had somehow been prophetic, and things _would_ turn out alright, despite everything.

For his part, Leo did an admirable job of ignoring her stares. He was mostly quiet, observing the interactions around him without really participating, which wasn't really all that unusual for him. Of all his brothers Leo had always been the most quiet and reserved. He didn't seem overly uncomfortable though. He would occasionally smile at Mikey's various antics, and a couple of times April saw him lean over and murmur something to either Donnie or Splinter, positioned on his left and right side respectively.

It warmed her heart and eased some of her worry to know that after only a few short days he was already growing comfortable again around his family. She could only hope that he would reconnect with her and Casey with as much ease. She hated seeing the wariness in his eyes every time their gazes happened to meet, as though he wasn't quite sure yet whether she was a friend or an enemy.

With an effort she pulled her attention away from him yet again and tried to focus on the conversations going on around her.

"I see you lost the sling, Case," Raph commented, tossing his friend another slice of pizza from across the table.

Casey used his plate to expertly catch the flying slice, grinning back at his friend "Just this morning," he confirmed. "Doc still doesn't want me to lift anything too heavy, but at least now I can go back to work."

"Thank God," April added, shaking her head slightly. "I love you Casey, but having you around twenty-four seven has been…interesting to say the least."

Mikey chortled at that, nudging Casey with his elbow. "I'm surprised she didn't throw you out the window after the first day," he commented slyly, opening his mouth and shoving half a slice of pizza inside.

"You're one to talk," Donnie commented, rolling his eyes at his brother. "_You_ wouldn't even last a day!"

This comment ignited a heated debate in which Casey and Mikey stoutly defended themselves, claiming that their bodies simply were not made for stillness or boredom, and it was no fault of their own. This conversation in turn turned to what might happen if April ever _did_ throw them from her window, and the resulting comments were nothing if not creative.

April found herself caught up in the conversation, enjoying the laughter and warmth she had missed so much. It seemed that even without his memories, Leo's simple presence was enough to bring back the light and life that had been so painfully missing in this place for the last six months. Even Leo was affected by it, some of the tension she had sensed in him earlier melting away as he silently watched the frivolity going on around him, the slightest of smiles dancing behind his blue eyes.

Eventually Splinter excused himself for his evening meditation, and things began to calm down a bit. Most of the pizza was gone by this time, and April knew dinner was almost over. She couldn't help but feel a little disappointed, knowing they would be heading out soon. She didn't want the night to end.

Seeing her adoptive family whole once again was so incredibly amazing she knew she would be riding the high from it for quite some time to come. Sure, there were undoubtedly some challenges ahead, but she had absolute faith that together this family would get through them. Things might never be exactly the way they were, but tonight had proven they could still be good.

She glanced across the table, surprised when Leo looked up and met her gaze, smiling slightly and nodding his head. It was such a little thing, but it still sent joy flooding through her.

Yes, things were good. Really good.

* * *

Having Casey and April over for dinner was a good thing.

Raph had to admit that at first he hadn't been too sure. He had thought it would be too much too soon for Leo, but after the initial awkwardness had worn off, his brother had seemed to relax and honestly enjoy himself. It was a huge relief, and one less thing to worry about in the slow process of reclaiming some of their old life back.

But now dinner was over, and everyone was lingering around the table, talking and laughing quietly, reluctant to end what had turned out to be a very pleasant evening. Even so, Raph couldn't help but notice that Leo was showing signs of exhaustion. He was doing his best to follow the conversations around him, but he kept blinking his eyes and shaking his head slightly, a tell-tale sign that he was struggling to stay awake.

Raph was a little surprised that Donnie hadn't noticed this already and ushered their brother off to bed, especially with how close the genius had been watching over Leo the last couple of days, as though he had appointed himself Leo's guardian or something. But Donnie was caught up in an animated discussion with April and it didn't look like it was going to end any time soon. As for Mikey, he was too busy making a smiley face on the tabletop with the leftover olives to notice anything going on around him.

Which meant it was up to Raph.

Pushing his chair back and starting to stand, Raph paused when he felt a strong hand reach out and grip his elbow. He turned in surprise to find Casey looking at him with an uncharacteristic serious expression on his face. "Hey Raph, you mind if I talk to you a moment," he asked, his voice tuned low, the conversation obviously meant for Raph's ears alone.

Frowning slightly, Raph glanced over to Leo once more before reluctantly turning back toward his friend and sinking down into his chair "What is it Casey?" he asked, also keeping his voice low.

Casey shifted slightly, his gaze sweeping quickly over the other inhabitants of the table before coming back to rest on Raph. "I didn't want to say anything earlier and ruin the mood," he explained softly, "but I wanted to let you know that something's going on up top…something that's not quite right."

Raph's frown deepened. "Not quite right?" he repeated slowly. "Do you mind explaining that a little better buddy?"

Casey shrugged, letting out a soft sigh. "It's hard to explain," he began slowly. "I haven't been out and about much with my bum arm, but the few times I did, everything was quiet. And with the risk of sounding cheesilly cliché, I'll add _too _quiet. But last night I swear I saw a couple of Dragons slinking around where they didn't belong."

Raph stared at his friend in consternation before rolling his eyes. "Uh, isn't that kinda what the Dragons do, Casey? Slink around where there not supposed to?" he asked sarcastically.

Frowning, Casey reached out and punched him lightly on his arm. "That's not what I meant," he growled. "I mean they were out of their territory. They were too far north, and if I had to guess what they were doing I would say they looked like scouts."

Raph instantly sobered at this news, frowning slightly in thought. "Do you think there's trouble brewing?" he asked, feeling a spike of concern race down his spine, remembering Casey's earlier warnings about a possible gang war.

Casey sighed, slowly shaking his head. "I honestly don't know," he replied. "It could be nothing, but my gut keeps telling me that something's up. There's a feeling to the air…like the calm before a storm, ya know?"

Raph nodded slowly, his gaze going distant as he thought about his friend's words. He trusted Casey's instincts implicitly. The vigilante had spent way too much time in the uglier parts of New York's streets to not know when something was up. Still, a part of him wanted to just brush off his friend's warning as not their concern. They had just gotten Leo back. Their focus should be on _him_ right now, not on some possible threat brewing on the surface.

He let out a soft sigh, shaking his head slightly. "Okay. Just keep an eye out for us, would you Casey? Let us know if something happens you think we should be aware of."

"Always," Casey answered easily. "'Till then, don't worry about it too much," he added, looking slightly chagrined, as if just now realizing he was adding that much more pressure when they obviously didn't need anymore. "Like I said, everything's been quiet so far."

Raph nodded his agreement. "Thanks for the heads up," he told Casey, pushing himself to his feet. "I'll be seeing you around, Jones."

The conversation around the table paused as Raph moved to stand behind Leo, lightly placing one hand on his brother's shoulder. Not wanting to embarrass Leo by calling attention to his obvious exhaustion, he quickly made up an excuse about needing to talk to him about something. Leo glanced up at him, looking surprised, but he didn't say anything as he pushed himself obediently to his feet.

"Night Leo," Mikey called cheerfully from across the table, and his words were echoed by a soft chorus of "bye" and "see you later" from around the table.

Leo murmured his own soft "good night," and the two of them left the kitchen and headed for the stairs. Raph didn't say anything, and Leo was likewise silent as they made their way up to the second level. As they walked Raph kept close to his brother, knowing Leo had to still be feeling pretty weak. His brother had always been a quick healer…they all were…but until he was able to sleep a bit better than he had been he was bound to continue to be a little shaky. Donnie would never let him hear the end of it if he let Leo fall down the stairs because he wasn't paying close enough attention.

Once they reached Leo's room, his brother dropped down onto the edge of his bed like a weighted stone, releasing a long sigh and running a tired hand down across his face.

"You okay?" Raph asked, eying Leo with concern.

His brother nodded. "Yeah," he muttered into his hand. "Just tired. It's been a long day."

Raph nodded silently. "Get some sleep," he murmured softly, already beginning to turn toward the door.

Leo called out, stopping him before he could leave. "Didn't you need to talk to me?" he asked, peering up at Raph expectantly.

Raph shook his head. "Nothing that can't wait until later," he replied easily. "You're tired Leo. You need to sleep." He turned back to the door and was halfway through it when his brother's next words stopped him short for a second time.

"I know you're angry with me."

Raph froze, his breath catching in his throat. He slowly turned back to face Leo, not even trying to hide the surprise on his face. "I'm not…" he began, but Leo cut him off.

"I know you wanted me to tell you more about the Wolf Pack. And maybe I should, I don't know. I just can't help but feel like I owe them, and I've already betrayed them once. But at the same time I know that I owe you all as well, and I don't want you to think…"

"No!" Raph stated loudly, the single word cutting his brother off sharply. Mentally kicking himself, Raph slowly shook his head in silent denial of Leo's words. He should have known his brother was feeling this way, torn between his old life and the family he didn't remember, and the new life he had begun to forge for himself with the Wolf Pack. He hadn't really been thinking yesterday when he had asked Leo to tell him more about them. And true, he had been angry, but not at Leo; it was more at the fact that anyone else—let alone an enemy—had claim to his brother's allegiance.

But of course Leo didn't understand all that, and being the idiot he was, Raph had gotten so caught up in his own thoughts and emotions that he hadn't paid any attention to how it was affecting his brother. He had made a vow in front of Casey that he wouldn't ever make Leo feel as though he wasn't welcomed, and yet here he was sulking around like a child and making his brother think he was angry with him.

Taking a deep breath he moved slowly back into the room, all too aware of Leo's gaze resting heavy on him. He sunk down onto the bed next to his brother, trying desperately to think of the right words to say. Truth was, he wasn't any good at this kind of thing and tended to avoid it whenever he could, but he knew he needed to explain. He needed Leo to understand.

"I'm not angry with you," he started slowly, his gaze fixed firmly on his lap. He knew it was the only way he could get through this. If he looked Leo in the eye right now he was a little afraid of what might come spilling out of his mouth, breaking free from the tight ball of twisted emotions he had been carrying around in his gut ever since his brother's return. "I get why you don't want to tell us more about the Wolf Pack, and…it's okay," he finished quietly, hoping Leo would believe him despite his somewhat lame attempt at an explanation.

There was a few seconds of silence, and then his brother spoke, his voice soft but even. "Okay," he stated simply, "but something is still bothering you."

There was something about the way he made the statement that was so incredibly Leo-like. Raph couldn't help but look up in surprise, green eyes meeting blue in a quick clash that stole Raph's breath. Gone was the hesitancy and uncertainty that had cloaked his brother's every move since his return, and instead his gaze was steady and open…expectant. It made Raph think back to any of the other numerous times he had sat like this in his big brother's room, hesitantly stammering out whatever was bothering him while Leo listened patiently.

The feeling of nostalgia brought on by those memories was almost enough to make him open up and share with his brother exactly what was bothering him. But like it or not, things were different now, and this burden was far bigger than any he had dragged to his brother before. Even worse, it involved Leo and had the very real potential of hurting him. They were just now starting to get to know each other again, and Raph didn't want to do or say anything that might jeopardize that fragile new bond.

"It's nothing," he muttered, the lie burning bitterly in his throat, that ball in his stomach clenching painfully. "You need to sleep now Leo. We can talk later." He started to rise from the bed, but one of Leo's hands shot out and grabbed his arm, the grip far stronger than Raph would have expected.

"Is this about what happened in the tunnels?" he asked softly, his gaze piercing into Raph, slicing through his thin attempt at deception with the ease of a hot knife through butter. "The night you thought I died?"

Raph couldn't help but flinch, and he knew his brother had to notice because he was still gripping his arm tightly in one hand, as though afraid if he let go Raph might try to bolt. The sad truth was, he wasn't too far off in that assessment. It never ceased to amaze—and irritate—Raph how perceptive Leo could be, especially when perception was the last thing he wanted from his big brother. He had known this conversation would have to be had sooner or later, but he had been hoping for later. He wasn't ready now.

But Leo was looking at him with that same expectant gaze, and Raph knew his brother would not be satisfied with any attempts to avoid the subject any longer.

"You know what happened, don't you?" he murmured quietly, his hands tightening unconsciously into tight fists in his lap. "You know we…we left you?" The words tasted bitter in his mouth, turning his stomach.

Leo nodded slowly, his expression unchanged. "I do," he replied simply.

Raph felt his heart beat quicken, and before he could stop it words were tumbling from his mouth, rushed and desperate. "You have to understand Leo, we didn't want to! I never would have left, _never_, but Mikey was so sick, and we couldn't get the rock off you, and I didn't know what to do. I know I should have come up with something, but I…"

"Raph!" It was Leo's turn to interrupt, the hand still gripping Raph's arm tightening slightly. "I already know all this. You don't have to explain anything to me."

Raph felt his jaw drop open in shock. "You already know?" he repeated in surprise. "But how…"

"I was listening outside the door when you explained to Mikey," Leo answered quietly, looking slightly embarrassed as he admitted to eavesdropping. "It was what made me decide to stay."

Raph stared at his brother in surprise for a moment before letting out an incredulous snort. "So, learning that we basically abandoned you to die made you decide to stay and meet us?" he asked, unable to mask the disbelief in his voice.

Leo shook his head. "No," he replied patiently, "Learning the _reason_ you left me to die made me decide to stay and meet you. I already knew about the rest. Viz told me. And I'd be lying if I said it didn't upset me at first. But once I knew the rest of the story…" He trailed off with a slight shrug.

Raph was having more and more difficultly trying to wrap his mind around the sudden detour this conversation had taken. None of this was what he had been expecting when he had imagined broaching this subject with his brother. Leo seemed so calm and unruffled, as though none of it mattered at all, and Raph just couldn't understand that.

"So…you're not angry?" He asked slowly, barely daring to believe it was even possible.

Leo gave a slight shrug. "How can I be angry when I'm the one who told you to leave me in the first place? How can I be angry when I know you did everything in your power to try and free me? How can I be angry knowing the only reason you left me was to save Mikey's life? You did what you had to Raph, and I get that…now."

Raph shook his head, still not quite believing that his brother was letting him off the hook this easy. It wasn't even like Leo was forgiving him…it was more like his brother didn't even see that there was anything to forgive in the first place. After carrying the heavy weight of what he had done for six long months, Raph couldn't even begin to fathom his brother's sense of calmness and acceptance of the whole thing. If he wasn't so shocked, he would probably be angry.

"But you lost your memory," he blurted out. "You could have _died!_ You were forced to spend the last six months with a bunch of mutated wolves who obviously used and mistreated you. All because I wasn't strong enough to save you. Doesn't that piss you off!?"

Leo let out a long sigh, releasing his hold on Raph and sinking back against the wall behind him, his shell meeting the stone with a dull thunk. "Look," he muttered tiredly, "I'd be lying if I said the whole situation doesn't suck, because it does. Losing your memory…well, it's not exactly fun." He paused, his gaze fixed on a spot on the ceiling above him. "But I've had a lot of time to think about it over the last couple of days, and I've come to the conclusion that I can either keep obsessing about what's happened and wishing I could change it, or I can accept the way things are and learn to move forward with my life." He gave a small shrug. "I'm trying to do the latter."

Raph stared at his brother, knowing he shouldn't be feeling so surprised. Leo had always been one to think things through with his head and make even the most emotional decisions using cool logic and calculated reasoning. Apparently that aspect of his brother hadn't changed despite his memory loss. Raph was the exact opposite, his responses driven by passion and emotion more than logical thought. It was one of the many ways they were so different, and one of the reasons he was having such a hard time accepting his brother's response. He didn't _feel_ like it should be this easy, and therefore, for him at least, it was not.

As if reading his thoughts Leo spoke again. "What happened wasn't your fault, Raph. It just happened, and there was nothing you could have done to change it. But all that is in the past now, and you have to figure out how to let it go."

Raph grunted but did not reply. A part of him knew Leo was right, but he also knew that the pain and guilt he had felt the moment he had made the decision to leave his brother behind would remain with him forever. There was no just letting it go. Something like that cut too deep, and it left behind scars that would never fade. At the same time, if Leo could move past the pain of what had happened to him and focus on the future, then the least Raph could do was attempt to do the same.

He slowly nodded his head, still not quite able to meet Leo's eyes, his emotions far too open and raw at the moment. They sat in silence for several long minutes, Raph struggling to process everything that had transpired. If he was honest with himself he knew that a large part of what had been bothering him so much the past few days was the fear of trying to explain to his brother exactly what had happened that night and why they had left him behind. He hadn't been sure Leo would understand, and he had been terrified his brother would be unable to forgive him. But Leo already knew what had happened and didn't blame him at all. That knowledge lifted a heavy weight from Raph's shoulders and dispatched many of his silent fears.

When he finally gained the courage to look up he found Leo leaning back against the wall, his eyes closed and his chest rising and falling evenly. Raph stared at his brother's still face for a long minute, filled with wonder yet again that Leo was somehow still alive. He had been so scared that things would be drastically different now that Leo didn't remember them, but if the last few minutes had taught him anything, it was that his brother wasn't really all that different after all. Not deep down. Not in the ways that really mattered.

Carefully rising to his feet, Raph reached out and gently guided Leo's limp frame down to the mattress. "Night bro," he murmured softly, covering Leo with the light blue blanket. "I'm glad you're home."

Leo let out a soft sigh, snuggling deeper into his pillow, his reply so soft Raph almost missed it.

"Me too…"

TBC

_I would love to hear your thoughts. :)_


	20. Chapter 20

_Thank you SO much to all of you who reviewed last chapter. I usually try to respond individually to each of you, but I have been so incredibly busy of late that every spare moment I've had has been spent getting this chapter written. Please know that I appreciate every single comment, as well as all you readers who have followed and favorited this story. You are all AWESOME! Hope you enjoy this chapter. _

Viz gave a short nod to the human guards standing outside the warehouse before sweeping past them and through the door, the soft light of the rising sun falling away behind him. He didn't hesitate, but headed straight for Alpha's office, the soft click of his claws against the wooden floor the only sound in the otherwise silent warehouse. He paused as he reached the office door, lifting a single paw-hand and knocking firmly twice. After a moment of waiting he heard Alpha call out an order to enter, and he pushed the door open and stepped inside.

The office beyond was dimly lit, and Viz couldn't help but wrinkle his nose at the stuffy and slightly musky scent filling the room. In his opinion Alpha spent far too much time closed up in this dark office, brooding and silently scheming.

"Report." The quiet order drifted from the darkest corner of the room, Alpha's tawny fur blending so well with the wooden wall behind him that the soft glow of his eyes was the only thing clearly visible.

Settling into an easy stance just inside the door, Viz didn't hesitate as he launched into his evening report. "Trenton and his men claim they have seen more Purple Dragons loitering around the area. They haven't started any trouble as of yet, but their presence is causing a bit of a stir with the men. They seem to think the Dragons are issuing some sort of challenge."

A low growl from the darkness met this statement, and Viz hurried on before Alpha could interrupt.

"There's more. While patrolling the area Talon and I spotted several men moving about the rooftops not too far from here. They wore the same strange uniforms as the men the turtles battled on the rooftop near Stockman's lab. They appeared to be searching for something, concentrating on abandoned buildings and warehouses in the area. We watched them through much of the night until they left shortly before dawn."

"Were you seen?"

Viz shook his head. "No. We kept our distance."

Alpha stepped forward, the shadows behind him seeming to swirl and shift like the edges of some dark cloak. "Enemies," he muttered, his gaze distant, his words tuned low. "We have enemies on all sides. They seek to take what is ours."

Viz didn't immediately reply, thinking again about the strange clothed men he had watched through the night. He had no way of knowing for sure, but he couldn't help but suspect that the men were searching for them. It was more than a little concerning, and the reason he had hurried back to report to Alpha right away. Whether searching for them or not, the men posed a threat that needed to be dealt with. They couldn't afford discovery now.

"What do you propose we do, Alpha?" he finally asked, watching his friend through narrowed eyes and trying to shake away the sense of impending disaster that had haunted him through much of the night.

Alpha let out another low growl, and when he spoke his voice was tight with anger. "Our enemies think us weak, otherwise they would never dare challenge us so openly. I think it is time we teach them otherwise. I think it is time the wolf left its den."

"What do you mean?" Viz asked, frowning and shifting nervously, something in his leader's tone setting his hackles on end.

Alpha turned to face him for the first time, his golden eyes sparkling in the dim light. "We strike first," he stated lowly. "Tonight, when they come to mock and challenge, we strike and we strike hard. And if these strange men on the rooftops return, we take care of them as well. This territory is _ours_, and it is time our enemies learn it will not be easily taken."

Viz released a quiet sigh. "It's risky," he warned softly. "If we take action now, it's bound to attract attention."

Alpha waved one paw-hand in the air dismissively. "And would you prefer we do nothing?" he asked, his voice scathing. "Would you prefer that we simply sit back and wait for them to make the first move? Or perhaps you think we should abandon this place and run away like scared little rats?"

Surprised by the venom in Alpha's voice, Viz slowly shook his head. "No Alpha," he replied simply, keeping his voice even. "I do not promote running away. But we must be cautious. If we move too boldly we risk revealing ourselves and losing everything we have fought so hard to gain."

Alpha let out a loud snort. "You speak as though boldness is a bad thing my old friend. Stockman mutated us in order to make us powerful, and in that, at least, he succeeded. The time of slinking around in the shadows is over. We hit these trespassers fast and hard and with a strength they will not soon forget."

"And if we are seen?" Viz couldn't help but ask. "If the authorities become aware of our existence?"

"Let them see us!" Alpha replied, his voice rising to a near shout, his eyes glinting with an almost mad gleam. "Let the whole world see, and let them cower in fear!"

Viz could only stare at his leader in barely concealed shock. He had always known Alpha to be an aggressive leader, but he had always been careful in his boldness as well. Now it seemed he was throwing caution to the wind. He seemed almost eager when he spoke of showing off their strength and power to the world. His mutation had awakened something dark in him, transforming his bitter anger into something much more reckless and menacing. Viz had seen it happening, but up until this moment he hadn't realized exactly how deeply it had taken hold of the pack leader.

A part of him wanted to try and reason with his friend, to point out all they stood to lose. He couldn't shake the mental image of cold iron cages and sterile metal examination tables, knowing that and worse awaited them if they were caught. But he couldn't bring himself to speak. Despite everything, there was something in him that compelled him to follow Alpha regardless of his reservations. Perhaps it was their long history together, or perhaps it was some minute submissive instinct transferred over by their mutation, but whatever the case he found himself swallowing his arguments.

"As you say, Alpha," he replied softly, pushing away the nervous apprehension churning in his gut. "Would you like me to gather the men?"

Alpha gave a sharp nod. "Take Two Toes and Talon with you," he ordered. "Make sure the men know that I expect full participation. If anyone chooses not to show up tonight, they will be cast from the gang and labeled as enemies." Drawing himself up to his full height, Alpha stared at Viz through narrowed eyes. "I want you to tell them that I myself will lead them in the fight tonight. When all is said and done, the whole city will know of the Wolf Gang, and they will come to fear us."

Viz merely nodded, bowing his head and turning to leave, but before he could exit Alpha had one more question for him. "What news do you have on the turtles?"

His expression a neutral mask, Viz turned back to face his leader. "There has been no sign nor scent of them as of yet Alpha," he reported evenly.

Alpha let out a low growl, turning back towards the shadows. "We will deal with the intruders first, and then we will find the turtles. Blade will regret the day he ever thought about betraying us. Now go."

Viz didn't need to be told twice. He turned and quickly strode through the door, suddenly eager to be away from the stifling room and the faint stench of madness and death lingering there.

* * *

"Hiyaaa!"

Donnie's Bo swept downward at an alarmingly fast rate, the wood a barely visible blur as it raced through the air toward the head of his would-be victim. At seemingly the very last possible moment the gleaming tip of a Sai rose into the air to meet the descending weapon, and with an expert flick and twist, the staff and its owner were sent flying through the air. Somehow Donnie managed to land on his feet, ducking into a low crouch and sending the Bo whirling out once more, this time in a sweeping arc aimed at his opponents' feet. Raph just barely managed to leap over the staff, but his balance was slightly off, and Donnie rose with another loud shout and sent a side kick toward his brother's chest. Raph blocked the kick with a muscled forearm, grunting softly at the impact before squaring his stance and preparing for the next attack.

Kneeling at the edge of the dojo next to Mikey and Master Splinter, Blade watched the ferocious battle taking place before him with wide eyes. There was no denying the match was fast and brutal, and yet at the same time there was something beautiful about it, like a choreographed dance practiced and performed to stunning perfection. He watched in awe as first one brother and then the other took the offensive while the other defended with speed and grace. He couldn't help but get caught up in the intensity of the fight, holding his breath each time a weapon arced dangerously close to green flesh.

In the end it was Raph who finally got the upper hand, using one Sai to capture Donnie's weapon and sweep it out wide even as he darted forward and swept his brother's legs out from under him in a single, controlled kick. Donnie landed on his shell with a soft thud, and a second later Raph was on him, pinning him to the mats with his second Sai tucked up beneath Donnie's throat.

Blade was on his feet and hallway to them before he was even consciously aware of moving. He stumbled to a halt as Raph released Donnie as quickly as he had pinned him, lowering his Sai and flipping to his feet, reaching down to offer his brother a hand up. Once upright, Donnie and Raph both turned to look at him, and Blade felt himself flush beneath their questioning gazes. At his back he could feel Mikey and Splinter watching him as well, and he found himself wishing a hole would open up in the floor and just swallow him whole.

"That was…uh…really cool," he sputtered out lamely, wondering if it was possible to die from complete mortification. Of course Raph wasn't going to hurt Donnie! He had no idea where his panicked reaction had come from.

"I see you're moving around much better this morning," Raph drawled out, the hint of a lazy smirk beginning to spread across his face as he eyed Blade knowingly.

Blade gave a small shrug, realizing his brother was right. He never would have been able to move that quickly even just a day ago. He might have felt happier about his obvious improvement if he wasn't still feeling completely mortified by his over-reaction. The amused expressions on his brothers' faces certainly weren't helping his embarrassment any.

"Maybe you can start training with us again," Mikey suggested, coming up beside Blade and throwing one arm around his shoulders in a way that was a complete violation of personal space, and yet still managed to make Blade feel accepted and at home.

They all looked to Donnie for an answer, but the genius was already shaking his head. "I don't think that would be a good idea," he replied softly. "Leo's body still hasn't fully recovered from his illness, and too much strain now can actually slow down the healing process. Maybe in a day or so…"

Raph and Mikey both wilted in visible disappointment, but Blade couldn't help but feel slightly relieved. After watching his brothers' practice, he was nervous he would only end up disappointing them and embarrassing himself. True, he had always done really well sparring with Viz or the others back at the warehouse, but that was only after emptying his mind and letting his subconscious take over. It had worked well enough for him then, but he knew it could only take him so far, especially against opponents who likely knew his moves and fighting style better than even _he_ did at the moment.

"We will take it slow," Splinter stated, moving up on Blade's other side and casting him an understanding look, as though he knew exactly what the eldest turtle had just been thinking. "There is no need to try and rush your recovery. Training will resume when you are completely healed and comfortable." He put a slight emphasis on the word _comfortable_, and Blade couldn't help but smile over at him gratefully.

"Michelangelo," Splinter continued, turning his gaze on the youngest. "I believe it is your turn now. Raphael, you will spar with him."

Mikey bounced eagerly on his toes, drawing his weapons from his belt and sending them spinning in lazy circles around his body as he grinned over at Raph. "Don't worry, Leo," he stated cheerfully, his blue eyes sparkling mischievously. "I promise I won't hurt him too bad."

Blade groaned in renewed embarrassment, trying to ignore Donnie's quiet chuckle from beside him. Raph merely snorted, tipping his Sais toward Mikey in a silent challenge.

Retreating back to the edge of the mats with Splinter and Donnie, Blade mentally prepared himself for the upcoming showdown. Once they were seated Splinter called out for the match to begin, and with a brief bow to one another the two turtles launched into battle.

This second match was every bit as intense as the first, but Blade was able to watch it with a semblance of more calm. His brothers truly were masters of the weapons they wielded, and as such they maintained complete control, every strike calculated and measured. Even Mikey—who moved around a lot more than either of his brothers, dancing from spot to spot on the mats with apparent endless energy—seemed to know the exact reach of his Nunchucks and the precise amount of force to apply to avoid injury.

Watching them, Blade couldn't help but think if his own weapon. He hadn't seen his sword since his first evening here, and he wondered what had happened to it. While he had been living at the warehouse he had felt an almost desperate need to have the weapon constantly with him, rarely letting it out of his sight. But now almost a week had passed without him even _thinking_ about the blade, and that realization concerned him slightly. It said a lot about how comfortable he had become here. His brothers would probably say it was a good thing, but Blade wasn't quite so certain.

He hadn't thought about leaving in several days either. That thought had plagued him almost constantly at first, but now it was almost too much for him to even contemplate. It scared him a bit, how quickly he had become so dependent on this family. He should know better than to get so attached.

"You feeling okay, Leo?"

Donnie's soft voice drew him from his thoughts, and he glanced over at his brother. "I'm fine," he murmured quietly, offering Donnie a weak smile. "Just thinking."

"Must be pretty heavy thoughts," Donnie pressed, keeping his voice low so as not to disturb Master Splinter as he watched the dueling pair out on the mats. "You look like you ate something sour."

Blade let out a soft snort at that. "Kinda hard when all you've been giving me is bland soup," he retorted, before adding softly, "It's nothing, Donnie. I was just thinking about how quickly things can change."

Donnie looked thoughtful at that, his head cocking slightly to one side. "Are we talking about good change or bad change here?"

Shrugging one shoulder Blade turned to face forward once more. "I guess that depends," he answered vaguely, watching as Mikey completed a spectacular flying somersault over the top of Raph's head.

He could feel Donnie's eyes resting heavy on him, the curiosity coming off him in almost palpable waves. "Depends on what?" he brother predictably asked.

Blade let out a soft sigh, shaking his head slightly at Donnie's persistence. "I don't know, whatever the future brings I guess," he answered noncommittally, not really wanting to discuss his fears with his brother right at the moment. It was hard enough trying to figure out his own conflicting emotions, he didn't want to have to try and explain them to Donnie too.

His brother didn't immediately answer, and Blade dared to hope that was the end of it. He really should have known better.

"So what is it you hope the future brings?"

Blade turned to stare at his brother, earning a nonchalant shrug from the purple banded turtle. "I'm an engineer…I consider it my job to ask questions," he explained, almost, but not quite sounding apologetic.

Giving his head a resigned shake, Blade chose to take the easy way out rather than dive into the potential can of worms his brother's question had just opened. "I don't know what I hope the future will bring," he replied easily, "but I know what I hope it _won't_ bring."

Donnie arched a questioning eye. "Oh yeah, and what's that?"

Blade faced his brother, his expression bland as he spoke a single word. "Soup."

Donnie blinked, the answer obviously taking him by surprise. Suddenly his face split into a wide grin, and he let out a low chuckle. "Touché," he murmured, giving Blade a brief nod of the head before silently turning back to observe the rest of the match.

Blade let out a quiet sigh of relief. He had no doubt his genius brother was fully aware he was holding something back, but Donnie was letting it go…at least for now. Blade was grateful. He knew he would need to figure this all out sooner or later, but for now…later seemed just fine to him.

Today? Today he wanted to enjoy what he had, because he couldn't quite shake the feeling that it wasn't going to last.

* * *

"We move tonight, Mistress Karai," Hun growled into the phone. "Everything is ready."

"_Do not forget the plan_," Karai's voice came back over the line, short and clipped. "_Your job is to draw the wolves from their hiding place. My men will take it from there. Remember, they are valuable to Master Shredder and must not be harmed_."

"And the rest of their gang?"

"_That's your problem, Hun. Do what you wish_." The line disconnected with a soft click.

Lowering the phone, Hun stared out the window at the late afternoon sky. Tonight the Purple Dragons would make a name for themselves once more, proving to the other gangs in the city that they were not a force to be trifled with. Having the aid of the foot soldiers was an added bonus, but it would be the name of the Purple Dragons that would be on everyone's lips come morning.

And the Wolf Gang?…Well, they would be nothing but a memory.

* * *

"No way! Mikey, there is _no way_ we are watching that movie!"

"Aww, come on Donnie, it's a great movie. It's funny."

"It's ridiculous. I know _you _don't care, but I'd kinda like to protect my brain cells from extemporaneous degeneration."

"Huh?"

Raph felt a small smile lift the corners of his mouth as he listened to his two younger brothers bickering in the main room. After what had turned out to be a relaxed and enjoyable day they had decided on an impromptu movie night, and the traditional video selection debate was in full swing.

Normally Raph would have been right in the middle of it, stating his preference with extreme prejudice, but tonight he was in far too good a mood. He felt better than he had in a long time, his conversation with Leo last night having taken a huge weight from his shoulders.

"How about this one?"

"Boooring. Oooh, this one! We haven't watched this one in forever Donnie."

"Hmm, I guess that one's not too bad…"

The timer on the microwave buzzed and Raph reached in for the bag of popcorn, opening it with a soft hiss of escaping heat before dumping it into the bowl with the rest. It sounded like his brothers were close to making the final selection, which meant the night was just about ready to begin.

Carrying the giant bowl of popcorn and four cold cokes into the living room, Raph saw Mikey pop a movie into the old VCR as the rest of his family settled themselves in various places around the living room. Even Master Splinter was joining them, though if he stuck to tradition he would retire to his room halfway through the movie.

Donnie glanced up at him from his chair as he entered, snatching the coke Raph tossed him out of the air with ease. "Did you call April and Casey?" he asked.

Raph nodded, setting the popcorn and the rest of the drinks down on the nearby end table, handing a second coke to Leo who took it with a small smile and nod of thanks. "Yep. They said they'd try and make it down later but not to wait for them. April's waiting on a call from an important client and Casey's working a little late at the garage to make up for some of the time he lost."

Mikey flopped down onto the couch on Leo's far side, glancing around him in search of the remote. "You're going to love this movie, bro," he told Leo excitedly. "It was one of your all-time favorites, and now it will be like watching it for the first time all over again! The battle scene at the end is totally epic."

Raph shook his head, sinking down onto the couch on Leo's far side. He decided not to point out to his little brother that the chances of Leo staying awake for the entire movie was slim to none. He seemed to be doing slightly better today, but he still wore out quickly. Raph would be willing to lay a wager that by the time Mikey's epic battle scene rolled around, Leo would be lost to the world.

It didn't matter though. They were all together as a family doing something he had never thought they would have the chance to do again. Tonight was truly a special night.

They were barely ten minutes into the movie when Raph felt his shell cell vibrate against his side. He slipped silently from the living room into the kitchen, pulling the cell from his belt and checking the caller id. It was Casey, and Raph punched the button to connect them before putting the phone to his ear. "What's up, Case?"

"_Raph_!" Casey's voice sounded breathless, as though he had been running. "_You told me to call you if something went down. Well, it's going down all right. All hell's broke loose up here_!"

Raph frowned, feeling his heart rate increase at the slight note of panic he could detect in his friend's voice. Casey always tended to be a bit high-strung, but the vigilante rarely panicked. Not unless it was something extremely serious. "Alright, slow down shell head," Raph barked. "What the hell is going on?"

Casey made a frustrated noise on the other end of the line. "_I wish I knew_," he growled. "_I'm at Sixteenth and Glenmoore and it looks like a war zone up here. It's just what I was afraid of Raph…a gang war, and the cops are laughably outnumbered. I know you've got a lot going on down there right now, but…_"

"We're on our way," Raph cut him off, his voice firm. "Just stay where you are Case. We'll be there as soon as we can."

"_Got it_," Casey agreed, the relief in his voice obvious. "_Just hurry. I already see flames not far from here. There's going to be a lot of people that are going to need our help_."

Raph grunted his agreement before disconnecting with Casey. He walked back into the living room, flipping the light on as he went, ignoring Mikey's yelp of protest.

"Grab your gear, guys," he ordered flatly. "There's trouble up top."

They stared at him in confusion for half a second, and then Mikey and Don were up and moving, following his instructions without question or argument. They knew he would explain more on the way, but for the time being the serious expression on his face was all they needed to spur them into action.

"What is it my son?" Splinter asked calmly, rising from his chair. Leo stood also, moving to stand next to their father, the movie playing on forgotten behind them.

"Casey called," Raph explained. "There's trouble up in the Bronx and he needs our help."

A flicker of concern passed over Splinter's face, but it was Leo who looked the most alarmed.

"The Bronx," he repeated softly, his voice tense. "It's the Wolf Gang, isn't it?"

Raph hesitated for a bare second before nodding. "Yeah. Them and the Purple Dragons," he replied evenly. "I don't know what set it off, but Casey said things have gone crazy up there. A lot of innocent people may be hurt if we don't do something."

Leo paled slightly, but a second later his expression firmed into one of determination. "Where is my sword?" he asked, his voice gone flat in a way that told Raph his brother was in battle mode.

Grimacing, Raph shook his head. "You aint coming, Leo," he stated firmly, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at his brother resolutely.

Leo looked surprised for a moment before his expression darkened. "The hell I'm not!" he retorted. "This involves the Wolf Gang, which means it involves me. Now where is my sword?"

Before Raph could answer, Splinter took a step forward, laying a single hand on Leo's shoulder. "My son," he spoke softly, his grip tightening ever so slightly when Leo visibly tensed beneath his touch. "This is a battle you must trust to your brothers. You are not yet strong enough."

Leo gave his head a single, sharp shake. "I'm fine," he stated firmly. "I want to help."

'_Help who? Us, or the wolves he somehow feels so indebted to?' _

The silent thought stung, but Raph couldn't ignore it. Too much had happened…too much had changed. His brother had already made it clear that he was struggling between loyalties, and while Raph wanted to think Leo would almost certainly choose his family over the mutant wolves, he didn't want to put his brother in the position where he would _have_ to make that choice. Splinter was right; Leo wasn't ready for the battle ahead, mentally or physically.

Which meant that Raph was ready and willing to do whatever he had to in order to stop his brother from coming, even knowing it would hurt the fragile bond they had formed. He glanced toward the couch, mentally judging the best angle to take his brother down, preferably without hurting him.

"Leonardo," Splinter's voice was sharp, but his expression was compassionate as he stared at his oldest son. "If you insist on going with your brothers now, you will be putting their lives in danger, as well as your own. Their focus will be on protecting you without looking to their own safety. Would you so endanger them in this manner?"

Leo's eyes widened, his expression a mixture of surprise, hurt and anger. "I don't need protecting," he snapped, straightening to his full height and glaring at their father in a rare show of defiance that might have been impressive to see if the situation wasn't so serious.

"And yet protect you they will," Splinter replied calmly, not reacting in the slightest to Leo's anger. "We have just gotten you back my son. None of us will risk losing you again. Can you honestly say that you are at full strength? That you will be able to race several miles across town and then fight by your brothers' sides without showing any ill affect from your recent illness?"

Leo scowled, opening his mouth to answer, but Raph didn't give him a chance. "Sensei's right and you know it, Leo, so stop being so damn stubborn," he snapped. They didn't have time to stand around and argue over this. Casey was waiting for them and they needed to hurry. "In your condition you'd only slow us down," he added, softening his tone slightly to take the sting out of the words. "You're not coming, and that's final."

Leo's eyes flashed with anger, his entire stance going rigid, and Raph tensed his body in preparation for the inevitable showdown. A part of him was glad to see the familiar fire in his brother's gaze. It sure beat the timid caution that had been the new norm ever since his return. He just wished his brother had chosen a different time to remember his stubborn pride. He could only hope that when all this was said and done, Leo would be able to forgive him for what he was about to do.

"Raph, we're ready. I have your Sais and the…"

Donnie's voice trailed off as he and Mikey entered the room and immediately picked up on the stiff tension between their two elder brothers. Everything seemed to freeze, the slow tick of the clock above the TV sounding loud in the sudden resounding silence.

'_Please bro, don't make me do this_,' Raph thought silently, his hands tightening into fists at his side, his gaze locked with his brother's.

It was almost as though Leo read his mind, because suddenly some of the anger seemed to drain out of him. He took a deep breath, his blue eyes shining with something that looked suspiciously like resignation. "If I don't back down, you plan on using force to make me stay, don't you?" he asked softly, his eyes never leaving Raph's face.

Raph swallowed hard, but held his brother's gaze firmly, ignoring Mikey's low gasp from behind him. He didn't bother replying, knowing Leo wasn't really expecting him to.

"And I'm still weak enough that you'll probably be able to subdue me pretty easily," Leo went on, his voice taking on an almost conversational tone. "Which I guess will serve to prove your point in the first place."

"I'm sorry," Raph answered simply, meaning it more than he'd ever meant anything in his life.

Leo released his breath on a long sigh, his gaze dropping. "I guess that settles it, then," he muttered softly.

"You'll stay?" Raph questioned, not quite daring to believe his brother was giving in so easily.

Leo looked up at him, his expression dark with bitterness and defeat. "You're not giving much of a choice, are you?" he replied, before adding more softly, "Yes, I'll stay."

Raph felt a wave of immense relief wash through him even as he inwardly hated himself for putting such a defeated look on Leo's face. He wished he could tell his brother just how much he wished things were different…how much he wished it was Leo leading them now instead of him. The _old_ Leo. The Leo that had faced even the most difficult situations with calm determination and steady courage. His strength had always given Raph strength, and now he felt the leader's absence more harshly than ever.

But there was no time for hesitation and self-doubt. Casey was right, there were people who needed their protection. Raph would just have to man up and fulfill the role that had been assigned him, and he would have to do it without his big brother by his side.

Taking a deep breath he reached out and squeezed Leo's shoulder tightly, hoping to convey both encouragement and apology. His brother wouldn't look at him, so he turned instead to his father, receiving a small nod from the rat master, Splinter's silent promise that he would watch out for Leo.

Raph stepped back and was about to turn away when Leo suddenly spoke, his gaze still not quite meeting Raph's. "Alpha's the leader," he stated softly, his words even and precise. "He's light brown in coloring and rarely leaves the warehouse, but if he thinks the territory is threatened he undoubtedly will do whatever it takes to protect it. He's an ex-military captain that has a grudge against just about everybody. He's after power and control, and he won't let anything stand in the way of achieving that. He's smart and cunning, so don't underestimate him."

He paused, finally looking directly at Raph, his expression set in firm determination.

"Two Toes is the black wolf, and he's dangerous Raph. He's got a violent and bloodthirsty streak that he doesn't even bother to try and hide. He won't care about hurting innocents, and he won't hold back in battle. He hates me with a passion, and that hatred will undoubtedly bleed over to the rest of you. He won't just try to kill you, he'll try to make you suffer. Talon will likely be wherever Two Toes is, and he'll follow the black wolf's lead. You killed his twin brother several weeks ago, and he'll be out for revenge. He's not all that smart, but he is fast and he has no compulsion about coming at you from your blind side, so watch your back."

Again he paused, and this time Raph could tell he was struggling internally, his expression showing a myriad of conflicting emotions. When he finally spoke, his voice was tuned low, as though he were struggling against some internal demon to even get the words out.

"Viz is the last one. He's a dark gray in color and he's Alpha's second in command. I don't know all the history, but I know they served together in the army, and Viz feels indebted to him. He'll do whatever Alpha commands, whether he likes it or not." He swallowed hard, his gaze turning suddenly intense. "He's not a bad person, Raph. He's the one who saved me in the tunnels, and he took care of me and nursed me back to health. He always stood up for me and did what he could to protect me. I consider him a friend."

Raph felt his eyes narrow slightly at his brother's words. Viz was the one they had fought at the warehouse…the one who had kidnapped Mikey. The anger still boiled just beneath the surface, but with an effort Raph pushed aside his own opinions and gave his brother a small nod. He knew what it meant that Leo was telling him this now, and he was warmed by the show of trust and loyalty. His brother was making it known that even though he wouldn't be with them, he still stood behind them…no small thing in Raph's mind.

"I understand," he said simply, catching Leo's gaze and holding it so that his brother knew he really _did _understand, both the spoken and the unspoken message. "Thanks for telling me this. It helps to know a little more of what we'll be up against."

"Just…be careful," Leo breathed out on a sigh, his tone heavy and resigned and so incredibly familiar that Raph couldn't help but smile despite the gravity of the situation.

"See you soon, bro," he whispered, then turned and strode for the door without a backward glance, his two brothers falling into step behind him.

* * *

Blade stared at the door through which his brothers had just disappeared, the drone of the tv behind him drowning out the wild pounding of his own heart. He had to tap down on the almost overwhelming urge to rush after them, no matter what he'd said to Raph. But deep down, he knew his father and brother were right. His body was still too weak. If he went out there now, he would only be a liability. It was the only reason he had backed down to Raph earlier, accepting the blow to his pride for the sake of doing what he knew was right.

Still, it was hard. His brothers were walking into obvious danger, and he was afraid for them. Really afraid. It didn't make sense, seeing as how he hardly _knew_ them, but the fear was there nonetheless.

"Leonardo."

Splinter's soft voice drew him from his thoughts, and he looked up into the rat's dark gaze. "I have to _do_ something," he whispered, the words slipping from his mouth before he could stop them, full of helplessness and frustration..

Splinter's eyes softened with understanding, and he motioned Blade to rise. "Come with me," he ordered gently, the words a cross between an invitation and a command.

With a final glance toward the door, Blade rose and followed Splinter across the lair to the thin paper doors that led directly to the rat master's personal room. It was one of the few places in this underground home that Blade had not yet explored, and he couldn't help but feel slightly curious as Splinter pulled back the door and motioned him inside.

The interior of the room was softly lit by a single lamp and a couple of flickering candles. The air smelled of incense, but not so much so as to be overwhelming. Several thick rugs covered the floor, and the simple furnishings of dark wood gave the room a warm and comforting atmosphere.

Something on the dresser in the far side of the room caught his attention, and Blade felt his eyes widen slightly in surprise. Two long strides forward and he was standing before the dresser, staring down at the twin swords lying peacefully on the polished surface. His heart beat faster as he drank them in, his fingers reaching out to brush lightly against the soft blue leather wrapping the hilts.

"Two of them," he breathed out, surprised and yet at the same time…not.

"The twin katana." Splinter's voice drifted from behind him, soft and contemplative. "Representative of body and soul. On their own, each makes a formidable weapon, but it is when they are utilized together that their true power is shown."

Blade continued to stare down at the blades, longing to pick them up and feel their comforting weight in his hands, but strangely reluctant at the same time. Just as these two swords had been separated on that fateful day in the sewers, he too felt like he was divided, torn asunder by the battle between who he had once been and who he was now. It felt…_wrong_…somehow to try and wield them when he was so lost and confused within his own mind.

"Come and sit with me," Splinter called, and Blade reluctantly turned away from the gleaming blades. Splinter was kneeling in front of a short table, and Blade quickly moved to the far side and sank down onto his own knees.

"There must be something I can do to help them," he blurted out, his mind returning to the issue at hand. "I can't just sit here and do nothing!"

Splinter let out a deep sigh, his dark gaze full of compassion and understanding. "I know it is difficult for you, but as I said before, it would be most unwise for you to leave the lair in your current state. You are injured, my son, in both body and mind, which only makes you vulnerable."

Blade dropped his gaze, staring down at his knees as despair ate away at him from the inside out. "Will it always be like this then?" he asked softly. "Will I always feel as though a piece of me is missing…as though I'm broken and can never be repaired?"

Splinter made a small sound in the back of his throat, leaning forward across the small table to rest one hand on Blade's shoulder. "I do not believe that to be the case, my son," he stated gently. "I still have faith that there is a way to make you whole once more."

Blade looked up at the rat master hopelessly, emotion causing his throat to tighten. "How?" he whispered brokenly. It didn't seem possible. Nothing they had tried so far had worked in the slightest. As much as he wanted to believe Splinter could be right, it was hard to muster up any real hope.

Splinter didn't answer immediately, his expression one of thoughtful consideration. Finally he spoke, his voice smooth and confident "There is a path we have not yet explored. I believe it might be possible to regain your memories through meditation."

"Meditation?" Blade repeated, unable to keep the doubt from his voice. "What do you mean?"

Again Splinter seemed to hesitate before answering, as though he were considering every word before speaking. "My Master Yoshi once told me a story of a young Ninja warrior who faced a situation very similar to your own," he admitted softly. "After more…_conventional_…methods of treatment failed, the young warrior retreated into his own mind, finding solace through meditation and repeated journeys into the spiritual plane. It was on one such journey, so the story goes, that the warrior discovered his core, or inner essence within the spiritual plane. The details of what happened after that are admittedly vague, but when the man awoke, his memories had miraculously been restored."

Almost unconsciously Blade found himself leaning forward as he listened, suddenly eager to hear more.

"I know it is not much to go on," Splinter continued, "but it is a possibility, and I believe a _good_ one, otherwise I would not have brought it up. It will not likely be easy, requiring time and patience, but if you are willing to try, my son, then I will do my best to guide you however I can."

Blade rocked back on his heels, considering everything Splinter had just told him. He had to admit that he was more than a little confused by it all. He didn't know what Splinter meant by "spiritual plane" or "inner essence," but it was apparent that the rat master truly believed it was possible for Blade to regain his memories. The chance of it, no matter how remote it might seem, was enough to make his heart beat faster with the timid stirrings of hope. He knew he would do anything…_anything_…for a chance to restore his mind and feel whole once more.

There was just one immediate problem.

"I don't know _how_ to meditate," he admitted softly.

To his surprise Splinter merely chuckled, his dark eyes sparkling with warm humor. "I do not think that, at least, will be much of a problem," he assured Blade lightly. "Meditation has always come naturally to you, my son. In truth, you excel at it, much to the annoyance of more than one of your siblings. You may not _think_ you remember, but if you let your subconscious guide you, I believe you will find reaching the spiritual plane much less difficult than you fear."

Blade nodded, remembering again how he had instinctually remembered how to fight, even without memories of training. Or how he had known the correct path home through the sewers without consciously thinking about it. He could only hope it would be the same when it came to meditation.

Taking a deep breath, he squared his shoulders and faced Splinter with newfound determination. "Alright. Show me what I need to do."

"Patience, my son," Splinter cautioned. "You must understand that this will take time. Even with your natural talent it is not likely you will find what you seek on the first try. It may take weeks, or perhaps even months. Longer. I do not know, any more than I know what will happen when you _do_ find it."

"All the more reason to get started now," Blade interjected stubbornly, trying not to let Splinter's words discourage him. It didn't matter how long it took, as long as there was even the slightest glimmer of hope, he wasn't going to give up.

"Traversing the spiritual plane is not like taking a walk down the street," Splinter replied, his tone as serious as Blade had ever heard it. "It can be difficult and draining, both physically and mentally. I have known skilled masters who have destroyed body and mind because they did not use the proper caution." He hesitated, shaking his head slightly as he came to an obvious decision. "It would be best if we wait until you are fully recovered from your illness before we begin."

Blade felt his jaw clench, frustration flaring to life deep in his chest. He understood Splinter's warning, but impatience warred with caution inside of him, leaving him feeling tense and agitated. Add to that the ever present worry over his brothers, and he knew he wouldn't be able sit around and simply wait. He needed to _do _something or he knew he would end up going crazy.

"Please, Master Splinter," he begged, putting every ounce of desperate longing he felt into his voice. "Please let me at least try. I can't just sit here twiddling my thumbs while Raph, Donnie and Mikey are out there fighting. At least this way I'll be doing something productive." He paused, forcing his eyes to meet Splinter's gaze before adding softly, "Please, father. Show me how."

It was the first time he had called Splinter father, and he watched as the rat visibly started. His stern expression melted away, replaced instantly by gentle warmth, his dark eyes shining suspiciously bright in the flickering light of the candles. "I know how you feel, Leonardo," he began gently, but Blade didn't let him finish.

"No, you don't," he interrupted. There was no way Splinter could know just how lost and desperate he felt; how confused, worried and afraid. He had been offered a brief glimmer of hope, but instead of reaching for it, he was expected to just sit back and wait? It didn't seem fair, and he was prepared to beg if he had to in order to get his father to at least let him try.

Splinter released a soft sigh, dropping his gaze briefly down to his hands folded in his lap. "No I don't" he admitted quietly. "At least not completely. But I do understand your need to do something, and I will not deny you that. If you promise not to push yourself too hard, and to follow my lead, then I will show you how to reach the spiritual plane." He paused, looking up and offering Blade a gentle smile. "It will serve as a nice distraction…for both of us."

Blade released a silent sigh of relief, excitement and anticipation coursing through his body, making him practically shake with renewed energy and strength. He could do this. He knew he could. "Thank you," he whispered, returning Splinter's smile with one of his own.

"Just…do not expect too much this first time," Splinter warned, shifting into a more comfortable cross-legged position, hands held loosely on his knees.

"I won't," Blade promised, mimicking Splinter's position and posture.

Splinter nodded, his ears twitching forward slightly in a small sign of his own eagerness. "Very well," he murmured softly. "Then let us begin.

TBC

_Okay, so if all the spiritual plane mumbo jumbo was confusing to you, don't worry. It's supposed to be. It lends it a sense of mystery and magic. Also, I don't pretend to really know anything about meditation and what-not, so in regards to this story everything is completely fictional and in no way is supposed to represent reality. Just thought I'd put that little disclaimer out there._

_Things are about to pick up pace a bit, so buckle your seatbelts… Oh, and don't forget to review. They honestly do encourage me to write faster!_


	21. Chapter 21

_Hey All! Happy St. Patrick's Day for all those who celebrate. Hope you enjoy the chapter. Thanks again for all the lovely comments and support. This story has now reached over 100 favorites, which simply blows me away! Thank you, thank you, thank you!_

The spirit plane was unlike anything Blade could have ever imagined.

He stood atop a high rise building, a giant water tower at his back and the city spread out before him, his gaze curiously sweeping his surroundings. Everything nearby appeared in sharp detail, the colors bright and vibrant so as to almost hurt his eyes. In contrast, things in the distance seemed blurred and undefined, no matter how hard he squinted. It was almost like looking at a watercolor painting, the details bleeding together and dripping from the edges of the canvas.

It was also completely quiet, the normal hustle and bustle of the city eerily absent. There were no cars speeding by on the streets below, no people walking the sidewalks or hanging out their apartment windows, no horns blaring or dogs barking, no pigeons pecking around on the rooftops…nothing. The unnatural silence was more than a little disconcerting, and he suddenly had the inexplicable urge to let out a shout, just to see if the sound would echo back to him.

Sensing a presence with him on the rooftop, Blade turned to find Splinter standing a few feet away, surveying the scene around him with a curious gaze.

"So this is the spirit plane." Blade commented, wincing at how loud his voice sounded in the resounding silence around them. "Is it always like this?"

Splinter turned to look at him, a small smile playing at his mouth. "The spirit plane is unique to each individual," he replied easily. "For me it is a lot less physical and more a place of impressions; warmth, calm, peace. I can make it take on physical attributes if I so desire, but I honestly have not done so in many years."

Blade frowned, considering Splinters words. "So this…," he gestured vaguely around him, "…is something _I'm_ creating?"

The old rat nodded, his gaze continuing to take in their surroundings. "Indeed," he murmured. "The spiritual plane is, after all, simply a place within your own mind."

"But it feels so real," Blade breathed. He squinted out into the blurry distance, the unnatural silence settling around him once more like a second skin. "Physically, anyway," he added. "So where are we?"

Splinter arched one eyebrow, moving forward to stand beside him. "You are the one who brought us to this place. Shouldn't _I _be asking _you_ that question?"

Shifting uncertainly, Blade scanned the area around him once more, searching for anything that might tell him exactly where they were…and why. "I don't recognize anything," he finally admitted. "I have no idea where we are."

Splinter hummed thoughtfully. "In that case, perhaps I can be of some assistance," he murmured, pointing down the street toward a plane looking brownstone apartment building. "That apartment is the home of our human friend, April O'Neil. Though I have never been on this particular rooftop myself, I am guessing that it is probably a rendezvous point for you and your brothers when you are out on patrol."

Blade stared at his father in surprise, the import of what Splinter was saying not lost on him. "But I don't remember it," he whispered, stunned. "None of it. If this place is supposed to be a creation in my own mind, how would I know to bring us here?"

Splinter regarded him with a small smile, his dark eyes sparkling with an inner light. "How indeed?" he answered softly.

Blade slowly shook his head, staring around him with new eyes. He still didn't recognize anything, but obviously his subconscious did, and that caused hope to flare anew inside his chest. He remembered what Mikey had said to him several days ago during their trek home through the tunnels; something about the information still being there, just out of his reach for the time being. It seemed his brother may have been right.

"So where do we go from here?" he asked, more than ready to begin this journey, find his _center_, and get his life back once and for all.

Splinter regarded him for a long moment before giving his head a slight shake. "This is _your_ journey Leonardo. I will help you as I can, but I am afraid that _you_ and only _you_ can find what you seek."

Blade sighed, not entirely surprised by the answer. Turning his gaze back out to the city before him, he struggled not to feel overwhelmed. Splinter had warned him this would take time, but he was just beginning to fully comprehend the enormity of the task before him. With no conscious memories to guide him, he had no idea where to even _begin_ to look, and as vast as the real city was, he had the feeling that this spiritual place was even more so.

As if reading his thoughts, Splinter spoke again. "Do not be discouraged, my son. You must let your spirit guide you, just as it guided you here to this rooftop. Wander this place and learn what it has to teach you, and when the time is right, I believe you will find what you are searching for."

Nodding slowly, Blade did another careful scan of his surroundings. If his subconscious had brought him here, to a place that had obviously held importance to Leo, then who knew what else it had in store for him? He had to admit, he was curious to find out. Even if he didn't find his _center_ right away, the process itself promised to be educational and enlightening.

Letting instinct take over, Blade closed his eyes and cleared his thoughts, prepared to let his subconscious guide him to the next step on this journey.

* * *

Mikey was admittedly more than a little distracted as they raced across the rooftops to meet up with Casey in the north part of town. He had no idea what was awaiting them, but instinct told him it would be unlike anything they had ever faced before. He could feel his adrenaline pound through his blood as he ran, tinged with just a hint of nervous apprehension.

It wasn't that he was afraid this new challenge would be too much for them. He had full confidence in himself and his brothers. He just knew that this was going to be big, and he couldn't help but wish that Leo was here with them.

He kept replaying the scene back at the lair over and over again inside his head. He was relieved things hadn't become physical between his two oldest brothers. Leo was just beginning to trust them again, and something like that would have definitely put a strain on the newly reforming relationship. He understood why Raph had forbidden Leo to come, and he knew his temperamental brother was probably right, but that didn't stop him from wishing things could be different. Over the last few months they had learned to fight together again as a new team, but it still didn't feel quite right, especially now that he knew Leo was still alive. He just wanted things to go back to the way they used to be.

If he had to guess, he would say Raph and Donnie felt the same way. Donnie kept giving tiny glances back over his shoulder, as though expecting Leo to show up behind them despite his promise to stay home. Raph was carefully focused on the task ahead, his shoulder's stiff and his expression hard, but Mikey knew his brother well enough to detect the hint of regret buried deep in those green eyes.

It was frustrating, knowing their family was slowly piecing itself back together, but their _team_ was still as broken as before. Maybe he was being greedy, but Mikey wanted them _both_ fixed. He was sure Splinter would give him some wise saying about time and patience, but that didn't help them right now. That didn't help them tonight, when their brother's absence seemed as much a gaping hole as the first night they had ventured up top without him.

Mikey forcibly pushed his troubled thoughts to the back of his mind as they met up with Casey on a high rooftop just south of the Bronx. The sound of sirens and the smell of smoke had become noticeable several blocks back, but even so Mikey wasn't completely prepared for the scene laid out below him.

The streets beneath them looked like something straight from a war movie. The flashing lights of police vehicles seemed to be everywhere, bouncing off buildings and up into the night sky like some macabre light show. The shrill cry of car and store alarms joined with the wail of sirens to create an overwhelming cacophony of sound. Several of the nearby stores had windows broken out, the glass lying in glittering piles across the sidewalks and spilling into the streets. A thin haze of smoke hung in the air, and in the distance the bright glow of several fires was unmistakable against the black backdrop of night.

Standing together at the edge of the roof they stared down at the chaos, silently overwhelmed by the sheer scope of it all.

"It gets even worse a few blocks from here," Casey informed them, his voice grim. "The gangs are out in force, brawling, rioting, and looting, and not necessarily in that order. The cops have brought in everyone they can, but they're still ridiculously outnumbered."

As if to punctuate his words the distant pop of gunfire rose over the noise of alarms and sirens, punching through the night in a quick staccato before falling silent once more.

"Civilians?" Raph growled, his hands clenching the hilts of his Sais in a white knuckled grip.

"Most of them were smart enough to run for cover once it all began," Casey replied evenly, "but not everyone's going to be able to get clear. As you can see, the gang's pyromaniacs have come out to play as well."

"So what's the plan, Raph?" Mikey asked, shifting restlessly from foot to foot as he stared at the distant glow of what had to be a fairly large fire. He remembered Casey's earlier assessment that it was the innocent civilians that were always hurt the worst in this kind of situation. It looked like the vigilante's words were already proving to be true.

Raph took in a deep breath, doubt and uncertainty playing across his features for a brief moment before being replaced by a look of hard determination. "We'll spread out and sweep the area block by block—help any civilians in trouble and try and pick off as many gang members as we can along the way."

It was a simple plan, but considering the chaos below them, simple seemed somehow better. It was painfully obvious that this mess was far too big for them to put a stop to altogether, but that didn't mean they couldn't still do _something._ From the looks of things, the cops could certainly use all the help they could get.

"What if we're seen?" Donnie asked softly. "I don't care about the gang members, but there's an awful lot of cops roaming around down there too."

Before Raph could reply a sharp scream pierced the night from somewhere on the street directly below them, and a woman dressed only in a thin nightgown tore from the shadows of a nearby building. Hot on her heels was a bulky figure, and as the duo passed beneath one of the street lamps below it became apparent that the pursuer was wearing a furry costume of some sort.

Mikey automatically reached for his Chucks, tensing in preparation to leap to the woman's aid, but before he had the chance a police cruiser tore around the corner, approaching from the other end of the street. Seeing the flashing lights, the costumed assailant immediately turned tail and fled down an adjacent street, leaving the frightened woman to collapse against the police car in a sobbing heap.

"What the hell was that?" Raph demanded, every muscle in his body tensed.

"That's the fourth wolf costume I've seen since I got here," Casey growled in response. "Just another way these sickos are trying to terrify and intimidate, though if you ask me it just makes them look ridiculous."

Mikey nodded his agreement. He thought applying the word "wolf" to the man's costume was being pretty generous. The man had looked more like an overgrown gerbil to him.

Donnie let out a small grunt, his expression turning thoughtful. "That might actually work to our favor," he mused softly. "If we're careful and stick to the shadows like we're used to, anyone who does happen to see us will probably just assume we're another of those costumed freaks."

Mikey let out an indignant snort. "I think I might just resent that comparison," he stated with a tone of carefully constructed disdain. "_We're_ not costumed freaks! W_e're_ the real deal, and proud of it!"

"Yeah well, be proud of it later," Raph snapped. "For now, just try to attract the least amount of attention as possible. Got that shell-head?"

"Got it," Mikey replied easily. "But we might have to do some self-esteem building exercises once were home, just saying."

Raph rolled his eyes but chose not to reply, instead leading the way over to the metal fire-escape that would bring them down to the streets below. "Once we're down, fan out and head north," he ordered gruffly, "but don't get too far apart. If you run into any kind of trouble, just whistle." He paused with one leg thrown over the side of the roof, his expression as serious as Mikey had ever seen it. "And keep an eye out for the _real_ wolves," he added softly. "Something tells me they'll be out and about, and as much as I want to deal with them once and for all, tonight's not the night."

Mikey couldn't help the small shiver that ran down his spine at his brother's words. He was glad Raph wasn't planning on actively pursuing the creatures. They would have their hands full enough just dealing with all the gangsters, he didn't want to have to worry about the mutant wolves on top of that. He knew it was a problem they would have to deal with sooner or later, but right now…later was just fine for him.

* * *

As a ninja master, Splinter was well used to spending hours at a time in meditation with little ill effect. Still, it was admittedly much more difficult to follow someone else in their spirit plane than to visit your own, and he could tell that he was quickly growing weary. The edges of his form occasionally flickered, like a candle in a soft breeze, a true sign that it was probably time to call it quits for the night.

And yet he didn't immediately speak, watching silently as his eldest son walked around the abandoned warehouse they currently found themselves in. They had been flittering in a seemingly aimless fashion from one location to the next for a couple hours. Some of the places Splinter recognized and some he did not. Each new location Leonardo would look to him for an explanation, and when he could, Splinter would offer up what he knew of the place. His son would listen, and then spend the next several minutes exploring the area around him, obviously hoping that something in his mind would kick into place and he would remember where he was.

It was a sound enough tactic in Splinter's mind, and he'd been content to patiently follow Leonardo's lead. His son had been eager enough to start out with, exploring each new place with patient curiosity. But as time wore on with no obvious progress, he had grown more and more frustrated and irritable.

Splinter had tried to warn him that this would take time, but it was one thing to understand something in your mind, and something else entirely to accept it in your heart, and Leonardo had never been one to take perceived failure lightly. Understanding this, Splinter had allowed the search to continue for much longer than he had originally intended, even knowing the strain and physical exhaustion it would cause for both of them in the end. He kept hoping something would happen that would let them end the night on a positive note, but he could only wait so long before he would have to admit defeat.

Releasing an inward sigh, Splinter turned his attention to the warehouse around him. It was one of the places he hadn't recognized, though for once Leonardo hadn't looked to him for an explanation. Judging from the sour expression on his son's face when they had first arrived, Splinter suspected he already knew this place. He couldn't be sure, but if he had to guess he would say this warehouse was probably the same one Leo had lived in with the wolf pack for the last six months, and from the looks of it, his son was not at all happy to be back here.

As if confirming this thought, Leonardo suddenly drew his sword and slashed out at a pile of boxes sitting in one corner of the warehouse, sending cardboard and other packing materials flying through the air. Splinter watched the rare display of temper with raised eyebrows, but chose not to say anything. Instead, he studied the sword gripped tightly in his son's right hand. A moment ago Leonardo had been unarmed. Now the harness that normally held the sheaths for his swords was strapped tightly to the back of his shell, but only one sheath was present. It was an interesting observation that Splinter wasn't quite sure what to make of. His son _knew_ there were two swords, and yet his subconscious still conjured up only one. It said a lot about his current frame of mind.

"This is pointless," Leonardo hissed, staring at the mess of boxes in front of him, sword still held tightly in one hand. "We just keep wandering around and around, and I don't recognize any of it. It's just a stupid waste of time!"

Splinter released a soft sigh, watching as the edges of his son's form flickered and danced, reflecting the turtle's inner turmoil. "I think it is time we stop for the night," he replied quietly, his voice soft and gentle, meant to convey encouragement rather than reproof. "You must not think of tonight as a failure, my son, but merely the beginning steps of what might prove to be a very long journey. We will try again in a few days, when you are better rested."

Leonardo turned to look at him, and Splinter could see the reluctance warring within his son. Despite his outburst, it was obvious he wasn't yet ready to give up. He would push himself until he physically couldn't go any further and then, and only then, would he be willing to stop. It was this stubborn determination that both worried and pleased Splinter, depending on the situation. Right now it was definitely the former.

But Leonardo had promised to follow his instructions, and Splinter would hold his son to that promise whether he liked it or not. He would give his oldest a few days to recover and then they would try again. As long as Leonardo was willing to keep trying, Splinter would support and encourage him, no matter how long it took.

Opening his mouth to insist they leave, he paused as he noticed Leonardo's gaze slipping past him to something behind him, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. Whirling in place, he immediately spotted what had caught his son's attention, and he felt his own eyes widen slightly.

A thick black fog was beginning to creep its way toward them from across the warehouse floor, sending fingers of darkness twisting and curling out in front of it, as though searching for something. Watching its slow approach, Splinter felt a chill climb up his spine. There was something dark and malevolent about the fog, though he couldn't exactly place where those feeling were coming from.

"We must go," he stated firmly, not knowing what the fog was, but knowing they wanted no part of it.

Leonardo didn't respond, and Splinter turned to find that the fog was closing in from the other side of the warehouse as well, its searching fingers already curling around his son's feet. Instead of moving away, Leo was staring down at the swirling fog with an expression of nervous curiosity.

"Leonardo!"

The word snapped from Splinter's mouth, carrying with it his growing sense of alarm as the fog continued to climb its way up his son's frozen body. Leonardo's gaze jerked up to meet his own, and Splinter could see the first flickers of fear in his son's blue eyed gaze. He finally tried to move, stepping away from the dark fog only to have its black presence follow him, clinging to his body like a shadowy cloak, swirling around him and seeming to grow and swell with every passing moment.

Splinter started forward, not entirely sure how to help his son but determined to try. He had gone no more than two steps when he felt a sharp tugging at his waist. He glanced down to see a tendril of the black fog had wrapped itself around his torso and was slowly beginning to tighten, as though trying to hold him back.

Leonardo's sudden cry caused him to jerk his gaze upright once more, a gasp tearing from his throat when he realized the fog had almost completely enveloped his son. Leonardo was struggling to break free, but his movements seemed sluggish and weak, as though he were fighting under water.

"Fight this, my son," Splinter called, struggling forward once more despite the tendril of fog wrapped around his waist. "This is all from your mind. You must…"

He never had a chance to finish his sentence as he was suddenly and violently jerked backward. He had a brief sensation of flying through the air one moment, and then the next he was jerking face forward onto the thick woven rugs in his room, gasping out a startled breath.

It took a few moments to regain his balance, both mentally and physically. Being jerked from the spirit plane like that tended to leave one disoriented and confused, not to mention the killer headache he was sure to have later. Nonetheless, worry for his son caused him to push aside his own discomfort and lurch forward to where Leonardo knelt.

There was nothing about his son's outward appearance that would immediately indicate he was in distress, but when Splinter tried to gently draw him from his meditative trance, there was no response. No matter how much he called to his son, or how many times he shook him lightly by the shoulders, Leonardo remained firmly locked away within his own mind.

Fear wrapped its fingers around Splinter's heart, and it was only with some effort that he managed to push away the rising sense of panic. He had heard of people losing themselves within the spirit plane, locked away inside their minds while their physical bodies withered away. He had always taken great care in teaching his sons the proper practice and techniques of meditation, and normally he would not fear Leonardo becoming trapped. But his son was not himself at the moment. If he were to panic, it would become all too easy for him to forget everything Splinter had instructed him before they began.

Watching his son's physical form closely, Splinter felt his concern only growing. Leonardo showed no signs of waking from his trance, but a fine sheen of sweat soon appeared on his body, and his breathing was beginning to grow ragged. It was a worrisome sign that all was not well within the Spirit plane.

Releasing a low growl of frustration, Splinter fought to control his emotions. He had known it was too soon to try this, but he had allowed his son's pleading to sway him. Honestly, his own eagerness to see Leonardo's memories returned had played no small role in his decision as well. But now his son was in trouble, and Splinter wasn't at all sure how to help him. Intentionally or not, Leonardo had cast him from his mind, which would make finding a way back in extremely difficult, if not impossible.

Still, Splinter was determined to try. He didn't know what was happening to his son, but he knew Leonardo was in trouble, and he wasn't about to sit around and do nothing.

Settling down into a lotus position, he closed his eyes and steadied his breathing, preparing to journey back into the spirit realm despite his weariness. His final thought before slipping into meditation was a fervent prayer that his other sons were faring better than them.

* * *

Leaning back against the wall of the alley, Donnie let out a soft hiss of pain as he struggled to tighten a bandage high on his left arm with fingers made slick with blood. He'd been lucky. The punk shooting at him had been aiming over his shoulder as he ran away, and his shot hadn't exactly been accurate, merely grazing Donnie's arm. Still, it stung, and unless he could get the bleeding under control he wouldn't last much longer.

A noise from the mouth of the alley had him glancing up to see Raph stalking toward him, his expression dark. He stopped in front of Donnie, pushing his hand out of the way and taking over the task of tightening the bandage. "How bad is it?" he asked, his voice low and gruff.

"Just a graze," Donnie answered quickly. "Nothing a few stitches won't fix when we get back home."

Raph merely grunted, but some of the tension eased out of his shoulders. "I saw the punk aiming for you, but I was too far away to do anything about it," he growled, frustration evident in his voice. "Don't scare me like that again!"

"Sorry," Donnie muttered, only a hint of sarcasm in his voice. It wasn't like he had _asked _the guy to shoot at him! At the same time, he knew Raph was just worried, and his older brother tended to get a bit cranky when worried. "How are Mikey and Casey?" he asked, hoping to change the subject.

Raph shrugged, pulling the final knot in the bandage tight and taking a step back to survey his work critically. "They're alright. They're watching the alley for us so we don't have any unexpected company."

The distant sound of a small explosion echoed from several blocks away, and a moment later a police cruiser sped past the mouth of the alley, its siren wailing.

Donnie let out a deep breath, closing his eyes and resting his head back against the wall for a moment as he mentally prepared himself to head back out into the chaos.

He had no idea how long they had been caught in the middle of this hell—but it felt like an eternity. It wasn't easy—rescuing civilians trapped in burning apartments, freeing a store owner held at gunpoint as his shop was looted, whisking a little girl hiding all alone in an alleyway to the relative safety of nearby emergency workers, saving two officers being pummeled by a group of Dragons—all while trying to stay mostly invisible. He was already exhausted, and there was still a whole lot of night left.

A hand reached out and gripped his shoulder, and Donnie opened his eyes to look up into Raph's concerned face.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Raph asked softly.

Donnie gave him a tired smile and a nod, pushing the throbbing ache in his arm to the back of his mind. He'd had worse.

Raph didn't look entirely convinced, and Donnie was pretty sure that in any other situation his brother would have insisted he sit the rest of the fight out. But that wasn't really an option tonight. They were already laughably outnumbered, and despite their best efforts the situation just seemed to grow more and more out of control. It was taking everything they had just to protect the innocent civilians caught up in this madness while simultaneously taking out as many gangsters as possible. They were completely out of their depth, this entire situation so much bigger than the skirmishes and back alley brawls they were used to.

But it didn't matter. They were in it now, and there was no way they were going to leave. Casey had said turf wars like this tended to dissipate in daylight, which meant they just had to hold out for another…what?…five to six hours? Piece of cake, right?

Gently shaking free of his brother's hand, Donnie straightened and walked purposefully from the alley. No sense in putting off the inevitable. As he stepped out onto the sidewalk he caught a brief glimpse of Mikey hovering on a low rooftop across the street. The worry on his brother's face was obvious even from a distance, and Donnie offered him a single thumbs up as a sign that he was fine. Mikey gave a tight nod before turning away and disappearing into the night's shadows.

Taking another deep breath, Donnie turned and headed in the same direction, unsurprised when Raph followed closely on his heels. He was likely going to have a shadow for a while until Raph was convinced he truly was okay. He didn't really mind. They could cover a lot more ground if they split up, but it was still nice to have someone watching his back. His recent close call had shaken him more than he cared to admit.

They stuck to the shadows as much as possible, ducking into nearby alleys or behind trash bins whenever a cop car would drive by, all the while keeping their ears and eyes tuned for any signs of trouble. Typical for the evening, they didn't have to go far before they found it. A few streets down they came across over a dozen gang members opening brawling in the middle of the street, fists and curses flying through the air. After watching for a moment, they skirted around them, letting the thugs bash each other's heads in without interference.

Not much later the sound of breaking glass and raucous laughter led them around a corner into a dimly lit side street full of small shops and a few dingy apartments. A group of thugs were in the process of breaking out the front window of a TV repair shop, several of them dressed in the same ridiculous wolf costumes Donnie had been seeing all night.

Smothering a tired sigh, Donnie reached behind him and pulled his Bo free from its holster on his back, gripping the familiar wood tightly as he exchanged a quick glance with Raph. His brother gave him a tight nod, his eyes glinting with a familiar dangerous light that only spelled pain and trouble for the idiots waiting for them up ahead. Donnie returned the nod with a small one of his own, and together the two brothers silently made their way forward, the gangsters completely unaware of their approaching doom.

The fight, if it was fair to call it that, didn't last long. As usual Raph bowled right into the middle of the group, fists flying, not even bothering to remove his Sais from his belt. Donnie approached a little more cautiously, catching the thugs stumbling back and away from his brother's bold attack and laying them out with a few practiced flicks of his staff. It took less than two minutes to take the whole group down, and then they were on their way once more, leaving the trash behind for the police to pick up later.

And so the night continued, the hours dragging by agonizingly slowly. Periodically the four of them would all meet up together on some rooftop or down an alleyway, faces drawn and tired. Even Mikey's normally boundless energy and exuberance was dampened by a weary stoop to his shoulders, and soon Donnie wasn't the only one sporting a bloody bandage as exhaustion inevitably led to various acts of carelessness.

"This sucks," Casey observed some time later, staring over the edge of the roof they all were currently using to take a brief rest. "For every thug we put down, it seems there's ten more to replace him. Where are these guys coming from…holes in the ground?"

Raph muttered some kind of response, but Donnie wasn't really listening, resting his head back against the air vent he was sitting next to with eyes closed. He worked on keeping his breathing even and controlled, trying to ignore his aching muscles and the throbbing burn that had taken up permanent residence in his upper arm. He wasn't at all looking forward to all the stitching he would need to do once they got home, especially since he would much rather just fall into bed and sleep for a week.

He tried to mentally calculate how long they had before dawn, but in all the chaos he had honestly lost all sense of time. He knew it couldn't be _that_ far off, and yet there was no sign the madness below was ready to abate. This was quickly turning out to be the longest night in his entire existence, and he just wanted it to be over.

"Guys!"

There was something in Mikey's voice that had Donnie alert and on his feet in the blink of an eye, his Bo staff held ready in front of him. He immediately located his little brother crouched at the far edge of the roof, his attention focused on something in the distance in front of him. Donnie moved toward him, followed by Raph and Casey. They all responded automatically when Mikey motioned at them to stay low, creeping up beside him and peering over the edge of the roof.

"What is it Mikey?" Raph asked gruffly, his tone full of weary resignation.

"3 o'clock," Mikey responded softly. "Two rooftops over."

Donnie looked where his brother had indicated, at first not seeing anything. Then something moved in the shadows on the rooftop—something _huge_, and Donnie felt the breath catch in his throat.

"Is it one of _them_?" Raph asked lowly, his eyes also pinned to the spot Mikey had indicated.

"I think so," Mikey replied softly. "I didn't get a good look at him, but I think it might be the black one."

"I don't see anything," Casey whined, only to be hushed by all three of them at once.

They stared at the spot on the roof, none of them moving, barely daring to breath. After what seemed an eternity the shadows shifted once more, the giant form of a mutated wolf finally materializing from the darkness as the creature stepped to the edge of the roof. His form was so dark as to almost blend perfectly with the night sky, and Donnie supposed the only reason they were able to see him at all was because of the dim orange glow from all the fires.

Casey let out a low curse, finally able to see what they were all looking at. "I forgot how freaking huge they were," he muttered sourly.

The wolf stood frozen at the edge of the roof, its snout lifted up into the air as though smelling for something. Donnie felt his stomach drop as he realized their position put them upwind to the creature. He had no way of knowing just how sharp their sense of smell was, but he guessed it was probably pretty good. He could only hope all the smoke in the air would help mask their scent, but knowing their luck, he somehow doubted it.

As if in direct confirmation of this last thought, the wolf slowly turned so it was facing their direction, snout still lifted in the air. Donnie felt a chill sweep down his spine, a sensation that intensified as the wolf released a low and eerie howl.

"Do you think it spotted us?" Mikey whispered, the worry in his voice evident.

Before anyone could reply, the wolf's mournful cry was echoed by several more howls, these ones coming from either side of them and one from the back. And close…so very close.

Casey swore again, this time with a bit more feeling, and for once Donnie agreed with the vigilante's assessment one hundred percent.

They were surrounded.

TBC

_Okay, sorry for the double cliffy. I will definitely try not to make you wait a month for an update. Spring break is next week, so hopefully I'll have some free time to write, write, write. *Crosses fingers*_

_Hope you enjoyed. If so, please let me know by leaving a review. They are seriously my bread and butter!_


	22. Chapter 22

Blade was lost.

He had no idea how long he had been wandering in this black fog, unable to see anything, unsure where he was or where he was going. It felt like hours. He had tried multiple times to wake himself from his trance, but every time he thought he might be getting close to succeeding, the fog would roll in even tighter, squeezing at him until he lost his concentration. It was like it was a living thing, malevolent and angry, intent on keeping him trapped in this place for all eternity.

When he had first seen the fog he had been more curious than alarmed. But then Master Splinter had been torn from his side, disappearing seconds before the fog had closed in completely, leaving him blind and disoriented. He had called for the ninja master, stumbling in the direction he thought Splinter might be, but there was no answer, and he had eventually been forced to admit that he was well and truly alone.

That was when the fear had begun to set in.

With nothing else to do, he had wandered around, hoping the fog might have some end to it. But no matter how far he walked, it followed him, clinging to him like a second skin. Splinter had told him the spirit plane was merely a creation of his own mind, so where was this fog coming from and why couldn't he seem to control it? It was more than a little frustrating, and he couldn't help but feel like he was missing something important.

With a soft curse he forced his feet to a halt, reluctantly admitting to himself that wandering around blind in the fog was getting him absolutely nowhere. For all he knew he could have been walking in circles this whole time. He needed to stop and think. He needed to come up with some kind of plan to get away from this place.

What would Splinter tell him to do if he were here?

Before his mind could supply him with any kind of answer, there was a soft sound from somewhere in the fog ahead of him, a low metallic hiss that he instinctually recognized. Reaching behind him, he withdrew his own sword, the hum of the weapon leaving its sheath matching perfectly the noise he had just heard. His senses were on high alert, but it didn't do him a whole lot of good. The fog was still so thick he couldn't see a thing, and no more noises filtered from the darkness before him.

He debated calling out, but decided against it. If there was something in the fog waiting to attack him, calling out would just tell it exactly where he was. Instead he waited, listening intently, head cocked slightly to one side.

A few moments later he heard another sound, this time the low whistle of something cutting with speed through the air not far in front of him. The fog around him recoiled in reaction, and he almost thought he could hear it hissing as though in pain. The sound repeated itself a second time, this time even closer, and suddenly the fog seemed to lose some of its hold on Blade, retreating back several yards where it hovered, swirling angrily.

Blade was so distracted by the strange behavior of the fog that he almost failed to notice the dim form materializing from the darkness in front of him. When he did finally notice it, he tightened his grip on his sword, squaring his stance and preparing for a possible attack. The figure in front of him was still bathed in shadow, its features masked, but what little light there was reflected sharply off the twin blades held casually before it.

"Who are you?" Blade demanded sharply, eying the weapon's warily. There was something familiar about them, but with the fog still hovering so close it was impossible for him to get a very good look. He squinted into the darkness, trying to see his opponent, wondering what new madness this Spirit world had decided to throw at him now.

He got his answer a second later when the figure took a single step forward, the fog melting away from him, finally revealing his full features. Blade could only stare, the arm holding his sword slowly dropping to his side, his entire body frozen in shocked surprise.

The figure in front of him regarded him silently for a moment before sheathing his weapons in a single fluid movement, his sharp blue eyes never leaving Blade's face. "I have been looking for you," he stated simply, his voice soft and even. "I am Leonardo, and I believe _you_ have been looking for _me_ as well."

Blade struggled to find his voice, overwhelmed by the strangeness of looking at a mirror image of himself standing so calmly in front of him. It took a few moments for his bewildered mind to interpret what Leonardo had said, but once it did he felt his heart skip a beat in sudden understanding. "You're my center," he whispered, the words part statement, part question.

Leonardo gave a small nod of his head, glancing around at the wall of fog that held them enclosed in a cocoon of darkness. "I've been looking for you," he repeated, "but it has not been easy. This fog has fought me every step of the way."

Blade cast his own glance at the fog, suppressing a slight shiver. "What is it?" he asked. "Where did it come from?"

Leonardo turned back to regard him, one eye ridge arched. "It comes from you," he replied simply, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

The shadows must not have done a very good job of hiding Blade's incredulous expression, because Leonardo quickly moved to explain.

"The fog is the part of you that doubts. The part that is not quite certain you _want_ to remember. It is the part of you that still feels angry and betrayed by your brother's abandonment, the part that cannot fully accept the new chance you have been given."

Blade stared at Leonardo in surprise, unsure how to answer. The other had spoken so certainly, as if he knew Blade's every secret thought and fear, which, supposing he truly _was_ Blade's center, kinda made sense. Still, a part of Blade wanted to deny what Leonardo had said. Perhaps he had felt that way at one time, but he didn't anymore…did he?

If he was completely honest with himself, he knew there _was_ a part of him that still doubted, still hurt, still hesitated to embrace the new life he had been offered. He had shoved that part down deep, buried it until the voice of doubt couldn't bother him anymore, but it was still there. After living with the wolf pack all those months, this life with the turtles—their love and acceptance of him—seemed at times almost too good to be true.

But that didn't mean he didn't still want it.

Blade looked around him at the fog, seeing it with new eyes. He had thought it some kind of enemy, but the truth was it was all just a part of him, a physical manifestation of his doubts and fears. He was willing to admit what it was, but that didn't mean he was going to let it win. It had held him back long enough already.

"How do we get rid of it?" he asked softly, turning his gaze back to Leonardo, letting the other know with his words that he wasn't willing to give up.

Leonardo gave him a small smile, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "By choosing," he answered simply, before turning on his heels and walking away.

"Wait," Blade called, sheathing his sword and hurrying to follow before he lost Leonardo in the darkness. The cocoon of fog followed them, blocking out any view of their surroundings, but Leonardo was walking forward confidently, as though he knew exactly where he was and where he was going.

"What is it I have to choose?" Blade demanded, though he thought he might already know the answer. The only real choice that lay before him was whether or not to continue to pursue his memories, or to give in to his doubt and fear and let them go. The choice seemed so obvious though, which made him feel like he might be missing something important.

Without answering Leonardo suddenly pulled to a stop, Blade stumbling to a halt beside him. At first he couldn't see anything past the curtain of fog, but as he watched it slowly began to melt away, revealing the cool gray stone of tunnel walls surrounding them.

"We're in the sewers," Blade mused aloud, glancing down at the slow trickle of water meandering past their feet to disappear further down the tunnel. He looked ahead, noticing that the passageway they were currently in ended several yards before them in a low stone entryway. Whatever lay beyond the entryway was cloaked in darkness, but for some reason he couldn't explain, Blade felt a shiver of fear track down his spine, and he found himself taking an involuntary step backward. With the loss of his memories, he had learned to rely more and more on his instincts, and right now they were screaming at him that he didn't want to go anywhere near that opening.

He turned to find Leonardo watching him silently, his blue eyed gazing piercing through Blade like twin knives, leaving him feeling open and exposed. "It's time to choose," he stated softly, before turning to face the stone entryway expectantly, arms held loosely at his sides.

"Where are we?" Blade whispered, fighting to push away his rising sense of unease.

"We are where it all began," Leonardo answered simply, not turning to look at him.

"Where it all began?" Blade echoed questioningly, even as his mind supplied him with the obvious answer. His gaze warily tracked back to the dark entryway, and he couldn't suppress a sudden shudder.

"I died in that room…and from that death, you were born."

Blade swallowed hard, forcing his eyes to meet Leonardo's piercing gaze. He didn't want to think too hard about the other's words. Viz had told him that by the time they had reached him he had been under water and no longer breathing. After pulling him free, Viz had managed to revive him, but the gray wolf had admitted it had been a very close call. Leo truly had died that day, and in a way, Blade had taken his place.

"What are we doing here?" Blade asked, suddenly wanting nothing more than to be gone from this place. As if in direct response to his thoughts, the fog billowed in closer, obscuring the stone entryway and the dark room beyond.

Leonardo let out a soft sigh, and when he turned to Blade his gaze was almost apologetic. "If you truly wish to remember, then you must be willing to face what awaits you in that room," he stated evenly.

"And what exactly awaits me in that room?" Blade replied, unable to help the challenging note that had crept into his tone.

"Your past," Leonardo answered simply.

Blade swallowed, unsure what to make of the sudden bundle of nerves awakening inside his stomach. He should feel exited. After all, this is what he had come here to find. So why was he instead growing increasingly nervous?

He glanced back toward the entryway, though it was still hidden by the fog. He couldn't help but feel like there was more to this than Leonardo was telling him, which only served to fuel his doubt and hesitation.

"What will happen in there?" he asked softly. "Something tells me I'm not going to just step inside and magically get my memories back. So what do I have to do?"

Leonardo did not answer right away, and the silence grew until Blade began to fidget, finding it impossible to stay still with the force of the nervous energy running through him.

At last Leonardo spoke. "You must be willing to face the moment that began all this…the worst memory of your life." He turned to face Blade fully, something bright and intense in his blue eyes. "If you choose to go in there, you will not simply witness this memory, but will _relive_ it as though it were happening all over again. _That_ is what will happen in there. _That_ is the price to being whole once more."

Blade stared at the other turtle in shock, his breathe catching in his throat, his mind temporarily forgetting how to even breath. Unbidden, he found himself thinking of that tiny sliver of memory that had come to him the night Talon and Two Toes attacked him in the hallway outside his room. It had come and gone so quickly, but he could still vividly remember the feeling of absolute terror he had experienced as the water had lapped up and over his face.

Now, it sounded as though Leonardo was telling him he would have to experience that all over again. He would have to experience his _death_ all over again. It was absolutely crazy, and almost without thinking Blade found himself taking another step back, the fog roiling and curling about his feet in a mad dance that reflected his inner emotions.

"There has to be another way," he blurted, his heart racing so fast within his chest he thought it might burst free. To witness the moment of his abandonment and death would be hard enough, but to relive it as though it were happening all over again…? Blade didn't think he had that kind of strength.

Leonardo was shaking his head, his expression firm and yet sympathetic. "There is no other way," he replied softly. "You have but two choices: you can proceed, and when it is over you will remember everything…or you can leave now and remain the way you are. Only you can choose."

Closing his eyes, Blade fought to steady his breathing, pushing away his panic as best he could so that he could think. In all his wild imaginings about finding his center and regaining his memories, he had never imagined anything like _this_. Splinter had told him it wouldn't be easy, but this wasn't just difficult, it was _impossible_. In essence, Leonardo was asking him to die all over again, and even if his physical body would survive, he knew a part of him—the part that was Blade—would be lost in the process.

Was he honestly ready for such a sacrifice?

The fog was growing in intensity again, closing around them in thick, dark coils, but Blade was no longer afraid of becoming trapped. He finally understood what needed to be done to escape it; a simple choice. Either go forward and face what was in that room, or turn his back on it once and for all and forget about ever finding his memories.

Simple, right?

Blade almost laughed at that thought. It was strange, coming into this he had felt so certain about what he wanted; his memories back and his life whole once more. Yet suddenly he found himself questioning that decision. After all, were his memories really something he couldn't learn to live without? Did he really need them to move on with his life? This new family had already shown they would be willing to accept him just as he was, so why was he so determined to change things? Giving up his memories suddenly didn't seem all that hard a choice, especially compared to the horrifying alternative.

So why was he hesitating? Why was his mind filled with images of his brother's eager faces as they showed him around their home and watched him hopefully for any signs of recognition? Why was his heart crying out with pain at the thought of living a half-life? Why did he feel like a coward searching for the easy way out? Why did he feel like he was betraying himself? Betraying his family?

With a soft sob, Blade fell to his knees, clutching at his head as he was overwhelmed by too many conflicted emotions. He was afraid…terrified…of what faced him if he chose to go ahead, but a part of him was equally afraid of how he would feel if he chose to run away instead. He was being given a chance here…a chance to fix what had been broken. A chance to be whole once more. But did he have the courage to take it? Was it really worth the promised pain?

A cool hand fell on his shoulder, and Blade looked up brokenly into the face of Leonardo. A part of him hoped his counterpart would tell him what he should do, would try to convince him to take one road or another. But Leonardo didn't. Instead, all he said was, "It's time to choose."

* * *

There are some things in life that you just have to learn to accept.

Getting old was one such thing.

Still, Splinter had never felt the limitations of his age quite as heavily as he did now. He had been trying for hours to reach his son in the Spirit plane with no success, and the physical strain it had put on his body was tremendous. He was beyond exhausted, and the ever present ache in his aging bones had become something fiercer, a fiery pain that made him want to groan aloud.

He knew the dangers of continuing on, but this was his eldest son, who had been lost to him once and who he was determined never to lose again. He couldn't just give up. After all, it was his fault Leonardo was trapped in the first place. He _would_ get his son back, no matter the consequences.

But for now, he needed a small break, a chance to clear his mind so he would be better prepared to try again. Only a few minutes and then he would go in search of Leonardo once more.

Rising from his position on the mats was far more difficult that it should have been, a testament to his exhaustion, but he finally managed to find his feet. He gazed down at his son sadly for a moment before slipping silently from the room and heading for the kitchen. He was in desperate need of a cup of tea to help calm his mind and settle his spirit, not to mention the caffeine to help fight against the weariness that was constantly trying to drag him under. He had very nearly fallen asleep during his last attempt to reach Leonardo, a rookie mistake that had not happened to him in many, many years.

When he reached the kitchen he glanced at the clock over the stove, shocked to see that it was nearly three in the morning. He knew his other children had not returned home yet, and he couldn't help the worried frown that appeared on his face. From what Raph had told him, he knew they would be up against a challenge the likes of which they had never faced before. Their continued absence was not necessarily a surprise, but that didn't mean it wasn't a concern.

Bowing his head, Splinter released a long breath, trying to shake away the sense of foreboding that had settled over him. He knew from experience how easy it was to allow negativity to take over your mind when overly tired. He would just have to trust in his sons' training and skills to see them through. Right now he needed to focus on Leonardo, the one son he could still help.

At least he _hoped_ he could still help.

He worked to prepare the tea as quickly and efficiently as possible, using the microwave to heat the water instead of the stove as he normally preferred. He chose out the mixture of herbs with care, adding those he thought would help the most with concentration and endurance. Normally he would sit down and savor the tea, sipping at it leisurely until it was gone, but he didn't have the time for that now. Instead, he drank it quickly, grimacing as the hot water burned the inside of his mouth, but continuing on regardless. He had already been gone from Leonardo for too long.

Finishing the last swallow, he placed the cup in the sink before heading back toward his room. As he rounded the corner of the kitchen, he pulled up in surprise, a startled gasp escaping his throat.

There, awake and standing before him, was none other than Leonardo. The wave of overwhelming relief that washed through him in that moment was quickly tempered by concern as he took in his son's appearance. Leonardo's skin was pale and covered with a fine sheen of sweet, his head bowed and chest heaving, as though he had just run a great distance. He was grasping the edge of the doorway in a white knuckled grip, as though the thin strip of wood was the only thing keeping him upright at the moment. He was shaking, the violent tremors in his arms visible even from where Splinter stood.

Splinter took this all in with one glance, and then he was sweeping forward toward his son, reaching out to place a hand on one muscled forearm. "My son," he called softly, the relief in his voice obvious. "Leonardo, what has happened? Are you alright?"

Leo slowly lifted his head, his deep blue eyes meeting Splinter's for a brief moment before skittering away. There was something haunted in his gaze, haunted and afraid, and Splinter felt his concern for his son grow. "I'm sorry," Leo mumbled, his voice almost inaudible. "I wasn't strong enough…" he trailed off, his head bowing once more so his chin was almost touching his chest.

"Come," Splinter ordered, his weariness forgotten as he helped support his son away from the doorway and across the room toward the couch. When they reached it, Leonardo collapsed down on the worn surface as though the tendons in his legs had been cut, his whole body shuddering as he released a long and drawn out breath.

Splinter stared down at him, his worried gaze never leaving his son's face. He had a dozen questions he wanted to ask, but he bit his lip and held them back for the time being. There was a fragility to Leonardo that he had not seen in many years, and he sensed that now was not the time to push. Instead, he turned and hurried back to the kitchen, quickly working to prepare a second cup of tea.

By the time he returned to the living room, Leonardo had managed to collect himself somewhat, his form sitting more upright and his head lifted, though Splinter could still see the occasional tremor run down his arms. He met Splinter's gaze directly and muttered a soft "thank you" when handed the tea.

Splinter sank down onto the couch next to his son, unable to hold back his worry any longer. "Leonardo, what has happened to you?" he asked softly. "You were trapped in the Spirit world for many hours. I could not wake you, nor could I find you when I went searching. I was beginning to fear…" he cut his own words off, shaking his head slightly to rid himself of the ghost of despair he had felt after his repeated attempts to reach his son had failed time and again.

"I'm sorry," Leonardo muttered again, grimacing slightly before lifting the tea cup to his mouth and taking a deep swallow. "I never meant to get separated from you. I'm still not sure exactly what happened, but…" He trailed off, releasing a shuddering breath as he carefully lowered the tea cup to his lap.

"But what, my son?" Splinter pressed, curious to know what had befallen his son that had left him so badly shaken.

Leonardo hesitated for a moment, his entire form radiating tension. Finally he lifted his gaze and spoke, his voice almost toneless. "I found my _center_," he stated simply, his blue eyes sparkling with some deep emotion that Splinter couldn't quite interpret.

Splinter searched his son's gaze, hope warring with his lingering concern. He opened his mouth to ask Leonardo what had happened, but before he could the lair's main phone rang, shattering the silence. Any other time Splinter would have probably let it ring, but with his boys out, he couldn't risk possibly missing a call from one of them. He reached out and squeezed Leo's forearm in a quick grip that promised he'd be right back, than rose and hurried over to the phone, lifting the receiver from the cradle and muttering a quick greeting in Japanese.

"_Master Splinter_?" April's voice sounded slightly shaky on the other end of the line. _"I'm really sorry to bother you this late…or early…but I was wondering if you had heard anything from the boys?"_

Splinter released a soft sigh. "I am afraid not, Miss O'Neil," he replied quietly. "They are still out, as I expect they will be until at least dawn."

"_Yeah,_" April whispered. "_It's just, Casey promised to give me a call some time to let me know how they were doing, but I haven't heard from him. I finally broke down and tried to call him, but he's not answering his phone. I just have a really bad feeling about this_…" She trailed off, and it was obvious even over the phone that she was fighting back tears.

Splinter felt his heart go out to the girl who had become so much a part of their family. He could relate only too well with her worry. It was the same worry he felt each and every time his sons left the safety of the lair to go on patrol. Still, even though he'd had years to grow accustomed to the feeling, it still didn't make it any easier to handle. And April was right, there was something about tonight that simply felt…_off_.

"Why don't you come down here and wait with us, April?" he suggested, foregoing his traditional formality and using her first name in the hopes it would help ground her. "I will make you some tea and we will practice some light meditation to help calm you." His body groaned in exhaustion even as he made the offer, but he knew it was the right thing to do.

"_That sounds great_," April replied, the relief in her voice evident. "_I didn't want to bother you guys with all that's been going on, but I'd rather not be alone right at the moment."_

"You are never a bother, Miss O'Neil," Splinter stated firmly. "We will see you here shortly."

After disconnecting with April, Splinter turned back to the couch to find Leonardo watching him, his eyes narrowed with worry. "They're still gone, aren't they?" he asked, his voice tight.

Splinter sighed and nodded. "I'm afraid so," he admitted wearily. "They may not return until dawn. It is quite the task they are facing."

Something flashed in Leonardo's eyes, and then he was pushing himself up off the couch, his expression determined. "I'm going to go and find them," he stated, all hints of his earlier shakiness gone as his focus shifted completely to his missing brothers.

Splinter shook his head. "Leonardo," he began, his tone weary yet firm. "Nothing has changed…"

He was cut off as Leonardo suddenly stepped forward and engulfed him in a bone crushing hug, catching him completely off guard. "Everything's changed," he murmured against Splinter's fur, and Splinter felt a soft stirring of excitement and hope ignite inside his chest.

Could it be…?

Splinter knew he should argue. There were a dozen reasons why Leonardo leaving the lair was a bad idea. Nonetheless he remained silent, relishing his son's firm embrace even as he resigned himself to the inevitable.

There were some things in life that you just have to learn to accept.

* * *

"Guys, I think we should get out of here."

Raph glanced over at Mikey, noting the grim tenseness in his little brother's voice. As much as he hated to admit it, he knew Mikey was right. It galled, running from a fight, but this was not a battle they could win. Not without suffering casualties anyway, and that was a price he was not willing to make.

"Get to the streets," he ordered tersely. "We can lose them down below. Everyone stay together, and keep a sharp eye out." He knew the chances of shaking any pursuit would be greater if they split up, but he wasn't about to let Casey or his brothers out of his sight with the wolf mutants so near.

There was no argument from the others, and as one they rose and headed toward the fire escape on the far side of the building, running with their bodies low so as to minimize the chances of being seen. They were only halfway across the roof when a dark figure suddenly materialized in front of them, cutting off their path to the fire escape. Raph pulled up short, his hands flying to the hilts of his weapons, his heart hammering a wild staccato inside his chest.

The wolf blocking their path was the same one they had faced at the warehouse, his gray coat shining dully in the dim light, his features shadowed and unreadable. Raph knew their best option would be to strike quickly and try to take him down before his companions had a chance to arrive, but he found himself hesitating. He remembered what Leo had said about this particular wolf. His name was Viz, and he had saved his brother's life. What was more, Leo considered him a friend. It seemed wrong to simply attack him without even trying to talk first.

He opened his mouth, still struggling to figure out exactly what he was going to say, but the wolf spoke first.

"Where is he?" Viz asked simply, dark eyes scanning over them with a strange intensity.

Raph was taken aback by the sudden question, as well as the tone in which it was delivered. There was something almost accusing in the wolf's voice that rubbed Raph the wrong way. He found himself thinking of all the ways his brother had suffered while living with the wolf pack, and his voice when he answered came out a bit sharper than he intended. "He's at home safe, where he belongs."

Viz let out a soft grunt. "Where he belongs?" he scoffed. "You mean with the ones who betrayed and abandoned him?"

Raph flinched. He couldn't help it. Ever since his conversation with Leo he'd been working on learning to forgive himself for what he had done…or at least learn to live with it. But he had to admit, the wolf's words hurt, especially since he knew they carried some truth with them.

Before he could think of anything to reply, Donnie stepped forward. "It wasn't like that," he stated firmly. "Leo's our brother, and we would never do anything to intentionally harm him. It was all just a huge mistake!"

Viz's eyes narrowed, but he chose not to argue, merely shook his head. "I suppose it doesn't really matter anymore," he replied softly. Raph saw him beginning to tense and he knew the creature was preparing to attack. His own hands tensed on the handles of his Sais, but before he could draw them from his belt, Donnie jumped in again.

"Wait," he shouted. "We're not your enemy. Leo told us what you did for him. He still considers you a friend!"

Viz let out a soft sigh, and for a moment his features shone with something like regret before his expression hardened. "He made his choice," he murmured softly, his gaze focusing in on Mikey for a split second. "Just as I have made mine. Perhaps it is best he is not here. The time may still come when we face each other in battle, but at least tonight I will not have to kill a friend."

"I guess that means there's no chance of talking you out of a fight?" Mikey asked ruefully.

Viz shook his head. "It is far too late for that, young one."

As if in direct response to his statement, two more giant figures suddenly appeared on the rooftop, this time flanking their small group on both the left and the right. A small noise behind him told him the fourth wolf had also arrived to the party, which meant they were well and truly surrounded.

"Ah man, this is bad…really bad," Casey muttered from directly behind Raph, and for once Raph could say he agreed with his friend one hundred percent. He felt Donnie and Mikey shifting, turning to press their shells against his as they faced off against the wolves at his back.

"Excellent job, Viz," the tawny wolf on the left growled, moving a step closer as Raph watched him warily. "This night has turned out to be most profitable." He turned his attention to their small group, his lips turning up in a small sneer. "Where is he?" he demanded, and if Raph had been ruffled by Viz's tone of voice when he'd asked the same question earlier, it was nothing compared to how he felt now.

Pulling his Sais free of his belt, Raph glared back at the wolf, remaining defiantly silent, his brothers and Casey following his lead.

The tawny wolf waited for a moment or two before shrugging one shoulder. "If that's how you want to play it, so be it." He raised his voice, addressing his pack, "Kill the human and the other two, but leave the orange one alive. He and I have some unfinished business together. Before I'm through with him, he'll be begging to tell me where Blade is hiding."

Raph let out a low growl deep in his throat, the protective sound echoed on his right by Donnie. There was no way they were going to let these flea bags anywhere near Mikey. He narrowed his eyes in renewed determination, shoving down the small voice in his head that whispered this was not a fight they could win. In his mind he ran through everything Leo had told him about the wolves, desperately searching for some small nugget of information that might help them out.

A sudden thought struck him, and he acted on it without hesitation, hoping he could at least buy them some time.

"We know why Stockman kidnapped and mutated you," he declared boldly. "We know the whole story. We even know about your background in the army, or in the case of blacky over there, the State Pen."

Just as he had hoped, Raph's words caused Alpha to draw up short, lifting one hand in a gesture to his companions to stay their attack. He regarded Raph with narrowed eyes, the burning curiosity in his gaze unmistakable.

"So I was right," he finally murmured. "You _are_ working for Stockman."

From somewhere behind Raph Mikey let out a snort. "Guess again, dude. Stockman's pretty high on our top ten most hated list. We wouldn't work for that guy if he offered us top pay, a luxurious condo, and pizza every day!"

"Did he transform you as well?" This question came from Viz, and just like Alpha some of the tension had left his stance to be replaced with open curiosity.

"What does it matter?" a harsh voice growled from behind Raph. "Let's finish this!"

Again Alpha held up a staying hand, looking expectantly toward Raph as he waited for an answer. But it was Donnie who spoke up instead.

"No, we weren't transformed by Stockman. Our mutation happened a long time ago and was more of an accident. But Stockman _did_ use our DNA to come up with the drug he used on you. It's all in his notes, which we have back at home. He's got a lot of stuff in there about his plans for you guys that you might find pretty interesting…" He trailed off, the open invitation in his voice obvious.

Alpha regarded them silently for several long moments, his dark eyes considering. "I suppose you wish to trade this information for your lives," he finally offered slowly, ignoring the low growl of anger that sounded from across the roof. "Perhaps if you had not killed one of my pack I would have considered it, but you have proven yourself a dangerous enemy that I cannot let go." His gaze flickered to Mikey, his expression turning feral. "One way or another, I will still get my answers," he finished firmly.

Raph clenched his teeth in frustration, dropping down into a fighting stance as he prepared for the inevitable attack. He had managed to buy them a few precious seconds, fat lot of good it had done them. But now the battle would begin, and for the first time in his life, Raph wasn't confident it would be a fight they would walk away from. His stomach clenched in apprehension, and it was all he could do to keep his eyes on the enemy instead of turning to look at his brothers. He would protect them and Casey as best he could, until his final breath, but never before had he felt so painfully inadequate. Things couldn't possibly get any worse…

"Well, well, well. Look what we have here."

Raph jerked in surprise as the sudden voice rang out from the darkness to his right. Despite himself he tore his gaze away from the wolves and turned his head to stare into the heavy shadows at the far end of the roof, recognizing the feminine voice immediately.

The shadows shifted, and Karai stepped from the darkness, a single sword gripped in one hand and a smug smile on her face. From behind her the unmistakable forms of a dozen or more foot ninjas moved into position flanking her, their faces completely hidden behind black masks.

"Looks like we were almost late to the party," Karai called, her tone light and mocking.

From beside him, Raph heard Mikey let out a soft groan, and he echoed his brother's unspoken sentiment completely. He hadn't thought this night could possibly get any worse, but he'd been wrong. It looked like they'd jumped straight out of the frying pan and right into the fire!

TBC…

_Once again, sorry for the delay and thank you to all who reviewed and/or favorited. You guys are the best!_


	23. Chapter 23

_Hey all! Once again I find myself apologizing for the lateness of this update. The past two months have not been kind to me. I lost someone very close to me, and then shortly after I ended up in the hospital and had to have emergency surgery. When I got out I found I did not have the physical or mental energy to write. My head just wasn't in the right place, and I knew anything I did write wouldn't be up to par. This story is too important to me to just throw something up. Sorry again, and I will do my best not to make you wait so long again._

_AN-Each POV change in this chapter indicates a slight overlap in time, so don't get confused…_

_Enjoy…_

* * *

Donatello and his brothers had faced death many times in their young lives.

Aside from the numerous close calls during battle, there were several other instances that Donnie could remember in great detail. There was the time Leo and Raph had been taken down by a couple of poisoned darts and Donnie and Mikey had been forced to fight off nearly two dozen foot soldiers in order to protect their unconscious siblings. Only the timely arrival of Casey and the police had saved the day on that one. Then there was the time he had been ambushed at the junk yard and taken prisoner by Hun and the Purple Dragons. They only had him for a couple of hours before his brothers had rescued him, but in those few hours he had faced death multiple times.

There were other examples. More than Donnie cared to think about. But somehow, through a mixture of determination, perseverance, and sometimes simple luck, they always managed to beat the odds against them and come out victorious…or at least alive.

That track record had seemingly ended with Leo's supposed death, and since that time Donnie had been unable to deny a growing awareness of his own mortality, a feeling of vulnerability that he had never really noticed before. Even with Leo's return the feeling hadn't abated, leaving Donnie with the unjustifiable and yet unshakable sense that it was only a matter of time before their luck ran out…this time for good.

Perhaps that was why their current situation brought more resignation than fear. Or perhaps he was simply too exhausted to feel anything else. He knew things were bad, _really_ bad, but all he felt was numb and tired…and perhaps a bit disgruntled. After all they had been through already this night, it really didn't seem fair that it would end like this.

It took all of Donnie's willpower not to turn around at the sound of Karai's voice from somewhere behind him. Instead he kept his eyes locked on the black wolf hunched and ready to spring only a few yards in front of him. He could tell that Two Toes was impatient for the fighting to begin, and he wasn't sure even this new distraction would be enough to keep the violent creature at bay.

"Who the hell are you?" Alpha's voice snapped with impatience, revealing his own displeasure at being interrupted.

Karai didn't answer right away, and Donnie could picture her offering a nonchalant shrug in reply to the pack leader's rough question. "You can just call me an interested party," she finally called out, her voice carrying that irritating undertone of mockery that Donnie had learned to hate so much. "Forgive me for interrupting. Please, continue with what you were doing, and when you're done, perhaps we can talk."

Alpha didn't respond and Donnie knew the pack leader was trying to interpret exactly what Karai's intentions were. Well, it would be downright impolite of him not to enlighten them.

"You want an enemy, Alpha?" Donnie called out, keeping his gaze locked with the snarling wolf in front of him but directing his comments to the pack leader. "Let me introduce you to Karai. She works for the Shredder, the man responsible for your mutation!" He allowed a brief second for that information to sink in, then hurried on. "Shredder's the one who hired Baxter Stockman to perform those experiments on you. He wanted to transform you into soldiers for his personal army, but you escaped before he could complete his plan. It's all in the notes I was telling you about. I'm sure Karai here"—he spat her name with as much venom and scorn as he could muster—"has been sent to recapture you and return you to him. They're your _real_ enemies here, not us!"

His pronouncement was met with silence, but Donnie noted Two Toes' gaze shifting away from their small group to flicker in the direction of Karai, doubt and suspicion dancing in his dark eyes.

"Is this the truth," Viz finally demanded, and Donnie could tell the gray wolf was directing the question toward Karai. He itched to turn around so he could follow the conversation with more than just his ears, but right now Two Toes was still far too great a threat. He could clearly remember what Leo had told them about the black wolf, and he wasn't about to take his attention off him for even a moment…not when his brothers and Casey were trusting him to guard their backs.

Karai snorted in reply. "I wouldn't put it quite so crudely…" she began, but Mikey cut her off before she could continue with whatever excuses or lies she might have come up with.

"Hey Donnie," he called, voice far too loud considering Donnie was standing right next to him. "Didn't Stockman refer to these guys as Shredder's pet dogs in his notes? I could have sworn I read that somewhere…"

The echo of four distinct growls cut off the rest of what he was going to say, and Donnie watched in nervous fascination as the black fur on the back of Two Toes' neck actually stood up on end. He was suddenly very glad that the wolf was no longer focused on them, but seemed to be staring past them toward where Karai and her foot soldiers stood.

Karai let out a short grunt. "Well, I was hoping to handle this the easy way," she stated calmly, "but if you must be difficult… Foot! Prepare to attack!"

Donnie almost rolled his eyes. He had no idea how many foot soldiers Karai had brought with her, but he guessed there would be quite a few. Still, one thing about Karai that they could always depend on was her tendency to put far too much faith in her soldiers. She always seemed to assume the advantage of numbers would automatically force the battle in her favor, no matter how many times the turtles had disillusioned her of that fact.

"Get ready," Raph growled, his voice low and tight.

At the same time Alpha was issuing his own commands. "Two Toes, Talon, take the turtles! Viz, you're with me. Tonight we will take revenge for what has been done to us!"

That was all the warning they had before the rooftop erupted in chaos. Donnie had only a second to tighten his grip on his staff and square his stance, and then Two Toes was bearing down on him, massive black form sweeping in like a tidal wave, intent on destruction.

Shifting his balance ever so slightly to one leg, Donnie waited until the last possible moment before sweeping out with his Bo, aiming the staff low, toward his opponent's legs. Remembering well the speed and power the wolves possessed, he kept the weapon aimed slightly higher than he normally might have. Seeing the swing coming, Two Toes attempted to leap over the staff, but was unable to get high enough fast enough. Donnie felt the impact of wood against flesh travel up his arm and into his body, strong enough that it made him grunt.

Two Toes stumbled to the side, his size and strength the only thing keeping him from going down completely. In the few seconds it took for him to regain his balance, the battle lines had been drawn. Donnie felt the shift as Mikey turned to stand by his side, nunchucks whistling through the air, and though he didn't turn to look, he knew Raph and Casey would be standing at their backs, ready to face off with Talon.

Two Toes swept in again with all the power and violence of a runaway train, and Donnie was forced to leap one direction while Mikey dove in the other. Even as they scattered their weapon's lashed out, but the blows didn't have much power behind them and they barely slowed the wolf at all. Two Toes came after Donnie but he was able to keep the wolf at bay using the long reach of his staff. He landed a couple of quick blows to his opponent's ribs before Two Toes tried to grab the weapon in order to yank it from his hands. Donnie was too quick, snatching it back just in time and rolling further away even as Mikey attacked from behind, his nunchucks landing a stinging blow across the back of the wolf's head.

Two Toes howled in rage, swinging around with more speed than Donnie thought possible, lashing out at the orange banded turtle with violent abandon. Donnie felt his heart leap into his throat as Mikey narrowly avoided the swipe of claws that would have torn half his face off, the near miss sending him stumbling back, eyes wide with fear. Before he could regain his balance Two Toes swept out with one furry leg, his paw connecting with Mikey's left leg just above the knee. Mikey cried out in pain, tumbling backwards to the rough gravel of the roof.

Powered by a sudden flood of adrenaline, Donnie leapt forward with a cry, swinging his Bo out in front of him to drive the wolf away from his fallen brother before Two Toes could press his attack. As he anticipated Two Toes dodged the strike, throwing his weight backward to avoid the sweeping staff. Donnie took advantage of the move by dropping the end of his Bo to the ground and using it as a pivot point to lift his body and swing around in a sharp arc, landing a double footed kick straight to Two Toes' chest. The wolf, already slightly off balance, flew backwards with the force of the blow, landing on his back a couple yards away.

Landing lightly back on his feet, Donnie used that moment to let his gaze scan quickly across the rest of the rooftop. Viz and Alpha were battling what looked like a small army of foot ninja on the far side of the roof, the strange hats of Shredder's elites poking through the mass here and there. The wolves seemed to be holding their own, but Donnie didn't focus on them long enough to form a proper evaluation.

Off to his left Raph and Casey fought with Talon. They had backed the wolf to the edge of the roof, but the creature was fighting with wild abandon, holding them at bay through sheer size and determination, his lips curled back in a snarl of hatred.

Satisfied that his brother and friend were holding their own for the time being, Donnie was about to turn his full attention back to his own battle, when from the corner of his eye he caught sight of Karai. The Kunoichi was stalking across the rooftop, naked blade in one hand, eyes hard and determined. Donnie quickly calculated her course, feeling his blood run cold as he realized Karai was heading straight for Raphael. His brother was so engrossed in his battle with Talon that he was completely unaware of the danger quickly approaching from behind.

Donne felt his breath catch in his throat as his mind's eye played through the scene about to unfold before him. Karai would reach his brother before Raph was ever aware she was there, and all it would take was one sweep of her blade to take him down permanently. Donnie could call out a warning, but considering the chaos surrounding them and his brother's intense concentration on the battle before him, there was no guarantee Raph would even hear him. Even if he did hear, Raph wouldn't be able to face Karai without turning his back on Talon, a scenario that could turn out every bit as deadly for his brother. Donnie was close enough he knew he could probably intercept Karai before she reached Raph, but then he would be leaving Mikey alone against Two Toes, and he didn't even know how badly hurt his brother was or if he'd even be _able_ to fight.

All this flowed through Donnie's mind in the space of a single heartbeat, freezing him in place in a sudden flood of indecision. Two brothers needed him, but he couldn't help one without abandoning the other. It was like that horrible day in the tunnel all over again, and Donnie's mind screamed a silent denial.

_No! I can't do this. Not again…_

But unlike that day in the tunnel there wasn't time to consider options, to debate decisions. Even as he stood there Karai was drawing closer and Two Toes was pushing himself up from the roof, a snarl of rage on his face. Whatever Donnie was going to do, he had to do it _now!_

Out of time and options, Donnie opened his mouth to scream a warning to his brother, already knowing it wouldn't be enough but desperate to do _something_. The cry was rising up his throat when suddenly, out of nowhere, Leonardo was suddenly there. One moment Karai was stalking with lethal intent toward Raphael, no one to stop her, and the next Leo was standing in her path, twin swords held ready in his hands, expression calm and focused.

The cry died instantly in Donnie's throat, and he could only stare in stunned surprise, the pure _relief_ rushing through him almost enough to bring tears to his eyes. He didn't have time to question the how or why of his brother's appearance…to think about all the reasons why Leo really _shouldn't_ be there. Two Toes had already regained his feet, and even as Leo and Karai met in a clash of steel on steel, the black wolf began to stalk forward towards them, the promise of death in his dark eyes.

"Mikey?" Donnie cried questioningly, not daring to turn his back on Two Toes for even a second but desperate to know if his little brother was okay.

"I'm here," came Mikey's immediate answer as he appeared at Donnie's side, limping slightly.

Donnie risked a quick glance at him, noting the pinched look of pain on his brother's face but also the fierce and defiant grin. The smile was all that he needed to see to know that Mikey had also witnessed the arrival of their oldest brother. He felt an answering grin come across his own face, some of the exhaustion and despair of the evening melting away in the face of a fierce new wave of determination and hope. They were all here. Together. Fighting as one for the first time in over six months. For some reason Donnie couldn't' even begin to explain that simple fact made all the difference in the world.

Two Toes swept in for the attack, as fierce and strong as ever, but this time Donnie and Mikey met him with a renewed sense of energy. The fight took on a dance like quality, the two turtles darting, weaving, ducking and rolling to avoid their opponent's sharp claws, their weapon's flashing lightning quick to land blow after blow. They moved in perfect harmony, years of training together paying off as each anticipated the other's move, one striking high while the other struck low.

Two Toes' attacks began to falter ever so slightly, a wary and slightly surprised look coming over his face. He obviously hadn't expected them to hold out against him for so long, and even though they hadn't managed to land a seriously damaging blow yet, the sheer number of strikes were beginning to add up. Donnie imagined the wolf had to be feeling quite bruised and sore beneath his thick layer of fur.

Despite this, Two Toes had size and strength on his side, and Donnie knew they wouldn't be able to keep up this pace for long. They were both already exhausted from a long night of fighting, and their injuries were beginning to take a toll. Mikey was hiding it well, but Donnie could still tell that his brother was favoring his left leg. Donnie's own arm throbbed with pain, making gripping his staff an increasingly difficult chore. He could feel blood oozing slowly down his arm from his makeshift bandage, and knew it was only a matter of time before reflexes slowed enough to let a potentially lethal strike through. He needed to find a way to end this, and soon.

The scream of tearing metal suddenly filled the night, rising above the general clash of battle as Two Toes' claws rent through the giant air conditioning unit Donnie had been crouched in front of seconds before. The machine immediately began to hemorrhage a massive amount of green liquid, and Donnie had a moment to feel incredibly grateful that it was the air conditioner and not him leaking fluids all over the roof. But as he danced away from yet another powerful swipe he found his gaze continually flickering back to the damaged machine, a slow idea forming in the back of his mind.

It was crazy and dangerous…very dangerous, but if it worked it could provide a way out of this mess for all of them.

Risking a quick glance around the rooftop Donnie quickly located the others, gauging their distance from the air conditioning unit. Leo was the closest, still battling with Karai several yards to Donnie's left. Raph and Casey were still at the far edge of the roof, their backs turned toward Donnie and the broken air conditioner.

It was now or never…

"Mikey, cover me!" he screamed, making a split second decision as he lept forward toward the damaged machine. He knew he was leaving Mikey in a dangerous position, but all he needed was one second. One precious second.

Kneeling beside the puddle of green liquid still pooling on the rooftop he reached into an interior pocket hidden inside his belt, drawing out a small custom lighter. Drawing in a deep breath and praying he wasn't about to make a huge mistake, Donnie flicked the lighter to life and laid the flame down against the far edge of the pool of liquid.

The effect was immediate.

And impressive.

And oh so very deadly.

* * *

Raph enjoyed a good fight. Of all his brothers he was always the most eager to leap into action, a trait that had caused tension between Leo and him on more than one occasion. Caution was not a word in his vocabulary. He never felt more alive than when he was fighting for his life, the adrenaline flowing through his blood like fire, the leather grip of his weapons hot against the palms of his hands. There was no greater high, and Raph marveled in the thrill of it.

But not tonight.

Tonight he was already exhausted from hours of fighting. Tonight he was facing a foe much bigger and stronger than any they had faced before, excluding the Shredder himself. Tonight he was feeling the absence of his oldest brother and leader more than ever.

Sending a sweeping kick at his opponent's side, Raph tried desperately to think of a way out of this mess. It was hard to imagine it, but Karai's arrival had actually turned out in their favor. At least for the time being. Instead of fighting four wolves they only had to face two. If they could take Talon and Two Toes down perhaps they would be able to slip away while the Foot were still busy with Alpha and Viz.

It was the best chance they had, but not all that easy to accomplish. So far they had managed to confine Talon to one section of the roof, his back to the steep edge, but Raph wasn't sure how much longer they'd be able to hold the wolf back. They were both tiring quickly while Talon seemed barely winded. The wolf fought them with a strength fueled by rage, his enormous size allowing him to shrug off blows that would have easily taken down a smaller opponent. His sharp claws and snapping teeth kept Raph and Casey from being able to get in close, where their weapons could do the most damage.

Raph knew Donnie and Mikey would be facing the same challenge with Two Toes, and his heart thrummed with nervous fear for his brothers. He didn't like being split up like this, not knowing what was happening around him but unable to take his attention away from Talon long enough to find out. It was frustrating to say the least.

"Hey Raph?" Casey wheezed, striking out with his hockey stick only to have his blow knocked aside by Talon's muscular forearm. "Is it time to go home yet?"

"I'll send you home," Talon snarled in response, slashing at Casey and narrowly missing taking the vigilante's arm off. "In pieces!"

Raph took advantage of Talon's distraction to slip in close and stab at the wolf with one of his Sais. It was a risky move, but it paid off. At the last second Talon jerked away, but not before Raph's blade tore open a long gash along his side, darkening his fur with blood. Talon attempted to retaliate with a sweeping slash of his own, but Raph ducked low and spun away, wincing as Talon's claws scraped harshly against the hard casing of his shell.

Sometimes he was really glad to be a turtle.

Squaring his stance and lifting his Sais before him, one tip glistening darkly with Talon's blood, Raph bared his teeth in a cold and challenging smile.

Talon snarled in response, pure hatred in his gaze. "I'm going to rip you…"

Whatever else the wolf was going to say was abruptly cut off as a loud whoosh sounded from somewhere behind Raph, followed by a blast of heat he could feel beating against the back of his legs, arms, and head. Talon's eyes grew wide, staring at something behind Raph that he couldn't see, his mouth gaping open in obvious surprise.

Raph couldn't help himself. He had to look.

Turning only slightly he cast a quick glance toward the center of the roof, taking in the orange red fireball disappearing into the sky above them and the light gray plume of smoke slowly spreading up behind it. Before Raph could fully process what it was he was seeing Donnie's shout sounded from somewhere near the smoke cloud, forceful and more than a little desperate.

"GET OFF THE ROOF! NOW!"

There was a note of panic in his brother's voice that Raph found himself responding immediately to. He had no idea what Donnie had done, but if the genius said to get off the roof, then that was exactly what Raph planned to do. Immediately.

Spinning around he aimed a hard kick straight for Talon's chest. The wolf, still staring at the smoke cloud behind Raph, was taken completely off guard, stumbling back from the force of the blow until he teetered on the edge of the roof, arms pin-wheeling in an effort to regain his balance.

Raph didn't stay to see if the wolf fell or not. Reaching out he grabbed a stunned Casey by the collar of his shirt and hauled the vigilante behind him as he dashed for the nearby fire escape. He hesitated as he reached the top, turning back to quickly scan the rooftop in search of his brothers. The smoke was spreading quickly, partially obscuring his view, but he just managed to catch a glimpse of two green shells disappearing over the edge of the roof directly across from him.

Raph felt his heart hammering wildly inside his chest as he turned and pushed Casey ahead of him and down the fire escape. "Go, go, go," he urged, his stomach churning with apprehension. What exactly had his brother done? With Donnie the possibilities were endless, but judging from the desperation he had heard in his brother's voice he guessed it had to be something pretty big. He couldn't help but hunch down slightly into his shell, half expecting the building to blow up around him at any moment.

"I can run on my own, Raph. Let go."

Casey's disgruntled voice sounded from in front of him and Raph realized belatedly that he still had a tight grip on the vigilante's shirt collar. He released his friend, and together they flew down the fire escape. Thumps from above them had him looking up in time to see several Foot soldiers following them down the thin metal stairs. Whether they were actually giving chase or just trying to get off the roof themselves Raph didn't know, but he'd just as soon not stick around to find out. He needed to find Donnie and Mikey and then get the hell out of here.

Live to fight another day and all that crap.

They reached the bottom of the fire escape and Raph immediately turned east, planning to head around the base of the building in the direction he had seen his brothers fall. He'd only taken a few steps when Karai landed with a soft thud on the sidewalk directly in front of him, having apparently jumped from somewhere on the fire escape above.

"Leaving so soon?" she hissed, straightening and pulling her blade free from its sheath on her hip. "'We're not done here yet, Raphael. Your brother saved you once, but then he ran like a scared rabbit before I was finished with him. So I guess I'll just have to come back to you."

Raph scowled at her, not at all sure what she was talking about but knowing she was standing between him and his little brothers. "Get out of the way Karai," he growled, lifting his weapons threateningly in front of him. "I'm not in the mood for your games."

Karai sneered at him, lifting her own sword to the ready. "Oh, it's not a game," she replied softly, "and if you want me to move, you're going to have to _make _me!"

The soft thud of feet hitting the ground behind him let him know the Foot from above had reached ground level as well, effectively surrounding them.

"Casey?" he grunted, never taking his eyes off Karai.

"I've got your back," Casey replied, his tone weary yet firm. "Teach that witch a lesson for me, would ya?"

Raph felt his lips pull up into a grim smile. "Sure thing," he answered softly, his grip tightening on the hilts of his Sais.

Without a word Karai started forward, her sword raised in an angle across her chest. Raph squared his stance and prepared to meet her, wondering grimly if this night would _ever_ end.

* * *

Donne had expected the puddle at his feet to ignite.

He hadn't expected it to ignite quite so forcefully, sending a burning fireball bursting into the air with a loud whoosh. He fell back with a cry, feeling the blistering heat wash over him in a mercifully quick wave.

'_The Freon must have had traces of some other gases in with it.' _he thought numbly, watching as the fireball dissipated into the night air above him. The thought was fleeting as his gaze snapped back to the green puddle at his feet. Small flames were flickering across its surface in a graceful and beautiful dance, wisps of soft gray smoke rising up in a growing cloud around it.

The sight of the smoke sent cold tendrils of fear down Donnie's spine, and he quickly pushed himself to his feet, sucking in a quick breath before shouting at the top of his lungs, "GET OFF THE ROOF! NOW!"

It was as though his cry—or perhaps the fireball that had come before it—caused the world to freeze. All fighting on the rooftop ceased as quickly as it started, everyone staring at the smoking ruins of the air conditioner in startled surprise.

Knowing he didn't have time to stop and watch and see if everyone would listen or not, Donnie quickly spun in the direction he had last seen Leo, knowing Mikey couldn't be far away either. Instead of his brothers he was met with a wall of pitch black fur barreling into him, sending him flying across the roof, tumbling end over end in a painful and dizzying somersault. He came to a stop on his stomach near the edge of the roof, his ears ringing and the world spinning. Somewhere in the back of his mind a voice screamed at him to get up, get away, but he couldn't seem to make his body work properly. He managed to force himself up on his forearms, but that was about as far as he could go.

Something grabbed him by the back of his shell, hauling him bodily upwards, and if he'd had any breath left in his lungs he would have cried out. He fully expected to feel tearing claws rip through his flesh at any moment, but instead a harsh voice whispered in his ear, "We have to jump!"

Donnie had only a split second to register that it was Leo, not Two Toes, holding him, and then his brother was pushing him over the edge of the roof.

A choked cry of alarm was pulled from Donnie's throat before instinct and training took over and he angled his body parallel to the roof, reaching out with hands and feet to catch along the wall. Their skin was thicker than their human counterparts, but the rough slide of brick against his fingers and toes still scraped and stung. Still, it served its purpose, slowing his fall from a lethal plummet to a terrifying slide.

The fall seemed to take forever, and when he hit the ground it sent a shock of stinging needles from his ankles up his legs. He tumbled down to land unceremoniously on his backside, dazed and bruised but still alive. A small grunt sounded from beside him as Leo landed a few paces away, stumbling but somehow managing to keep his feet. Donnie noted distantly that his brother held his staff in one hand. He must have dropped it when Two Toes had hit him...

"Leo, what...?" he began, but his brother didn't give him a chance to finish.

With a worried glance upward Leo hurried over to his side, once more bodily hauling him to his feet. He thrust Donnie's staff back into his hands before giving him a slight push down the alleyway. "We can't stay here," he gasped breathlessly. "We need to put some distance between us and this building."

"What about the others," Donnie argued, stumbling in the direction Leo was pushing him, reluctant to leave until he knew everyone had made it off the roof safely. Everyone _important_ anyway.

"I saw Raph and Casey heading for the fire escape," Leo replied tightly. "I think they made it out fine."

"And Mikey?"

Leo didn't answer right away, and when Donnie glanced over at him he saw Leo's jaw was tight. "I'm not sure," he admitted softly, still pushing them forward down the alley. "The smoke was in my way. I couldn't see."

Donnie felt his heart clench with worry, his gaze snapping up toward the roof of the building and the rising smoke he could see lifting into the night sky above it. "Leo, if Mikey's still up there…" he began, but Leo shook his head forcefully, pulling Donnie down a side alleyway that led away from the building.

"You said to get off the roof, and that's what Mikey would have done. Two Toes went after you, not him, which meant he should have had time to get down."

Donnie swallowed, hoping against hope that Leo was right, knowing that there was absolutely nothing they could do for their little brother now if he wasn't. The thought made his stomach churn with fear.

"How long do we have, Donnie?" Leo asked sharply, turning down yet another alleyway, steering them farther and farther away from the building.

Donnie shook his head, not quite sure what his brother was asking. "How long before what?" he asked.

"Before whatever you did up there goes kaboom," Leo clarified, his voice grim.

Donnie blinked in confusion before understanding struck him. "It's not going to explode," he explained quickly. "It's just smoke."

Leo stopped so fast that Donnie took several more steps before he realized his brother was no longer beside him. He turned to find the oldest staring at him, his expression one of blank surprise. "Just smoke?" Leo repeated softly, a hint of incredulity creeping into his tone.

Donnie swallowed hard before rushing to explain. "I set fire to the leaking coolants from the broken air conditioner. It burns slowly but releases a lot of smoke. Toxic smoke. It contains phosphene gasses, the same type of gasses Hitler used in his death camps. In less than two minutes that whole roof will be under a thick cloud of it. Anyone who stayed up there will be dead before they know it."

It was hard to tell in the dim light, but Donnie thought he saw Leo's face pale slightly. His brother glanced back in the direction they had come, though the rooftop was well hidden by the buildings around them. "What about anybody inside the building?" he asked softly. "Are they in danger?"

Donnie quickly shook his head. "The gas makes the smoke pretty dense, but the wind will eventually lift it up and away, dispersing it to non-lethal levels. Once all the coolant has burned even the rooftop should be safe fairly quickly. There's a small chance the fire may spread, but the gravel rooftop should help with that."

Leo looked relieved, his head slowly shaking back and forth in silent amazement. "A toxic smoke bomb," he murmured softly. "Only you, Donnie. Only you."

Donnie shifted his feet, his gaze dropping down to the dirty cement, feeling suddenly self-conscious. "It seemed like a good idea at the time," he muttered, doubt swirling through his mind. He had made a split second decision and acted on it, but now he was beginning to doubt the wisdom of his choice. If Mikey or any of the others had been caught in the smoke… Donnie shuddered to even think of it. He would never forgive himself. Never.

Leo closed the gap between them with a single step, reaching out to grip Donnie's shoulder tightly. "You did good," he stated, his voice firm. "Things weren't going too well up there, and they were just going to get worse. You gave us all an opportunity to escape that we desperately needed. It was smart thinking bro."

Donnie lifted his gaze to Leo's earnest face, his heart fluttering wildly inside his chest. He was desperate to believe his brother, but it was a little bit hard with half of their family missing. "What about Mikey?" he whispered raggedly, his voice sounding young and afraid to his own ears.

"We'll find him," Leo replied, his tone firm and confident. "Raph and Casey too. We're just going to have to be very careful. I think it's too much to hope that your little trick up there caused the Foot to tuck tail and run home, and I _know _Alpha and the others won't be intimidated that easily. I'd like to avoid more fighting if possible…find the others and get home. Once we're all together we'll stick to the streets until we can get away from the area. Dawn isn't too far off now, and I don't want to be caught up here in the daytime if we can at all avoid it. Especially since the media will be all over this place like flies on rotten meat."

Donnie listened to his brother mutely, something stirring inside his chest. Leo sounded so very much like…well, like _Leo_! The old Leo, before he had lost his memories. The way he was taking command, planning and strategizing their escape, and the way he had comforted and encouraged Donnie earlier…it was all so incredibly _familiar. _Familiar in a way that Donnie had not yet seen since Leo had returned, physically the same and yet somehow still so incredibly different.

"Are you okay, Donnie?" Leo asked, and Donnie realized that several seconds had passed as he merely stared at his brother, caught up in his own wild thoughts. Leo's eyes immediately turned worried, scanning his frame up and down, his gaze scrutinizing and evaluating. He reached out one hand and softly fingered the blood soaked bandage high on Donnie's arm, a frown tugging down the corners of his mouth

And this too was all so incredibly Leo like that Donnie couldn't help but blurt out, "Leo, do you remember me?"

Leo's gaze snapped back up to meet his own, blue eyes widening in surprise. Donnie felt his heart pounding wildly inside his chest, knowing it was foolish of him to hope, but unable to stop regardless. He had thought he had resigned himself to the idea that Leo would never regain his memories…would never really be the same again, but judging by the wild flurry of emotions racing through him at the moment he realized that believing something to be true and accepting that something were two very different things. He knew he would forever be grateful that Leo was still alive, no matter what happened…but that didn't stop him from desperately wishing his brother could return _fully_ to them…body _and_ spirit.

Leo continued to stare at him silently, his own eyes betraying a confusing mix of emotions, the hand still on Donnie's shoulder tightening. Finally he gave a slow nod, his eyes never leaving Donnie's. "Yes," he whispered softly, voice tight with emotion. "I remember you, Donnie. I remember _everything_."

It was not the answer Donnie had been expecting, but it was the one he had been hoping for.

Joy flooded through him, abrupt and strong, and before he even realized it he was pulling Leo in for a fierce embrace, uncaring of the pain in his arm and the pull of tired and bruised muscles. Leo hugged him back, his grip every bit as strong, and Donnie thought his heart would burst with the force of emotions sweeping through him. He wanted to say something, but his throat was suddenly too tight, and all he could do was hold on, his head buried in his big brother's shoulder, his eyes stinging with tears he didn't even try to fight back.

Relief was far too mild a word to explain what he was feeling in that moment.

"Well now, isn't this sweet."

The moment shattered like glass on concrete.

In a flash Donnie and Leo broke their embrace, turning to face the direction of the voice, hands reaching for weapons. Alpha stood framed in the dim light filtering in from the nearby street, his tawny fur splotched and stained dark in several places, his jaw dripping blood from a nasty looking cut across his muzzle. Despite his obvious injuries he still looked huge and intimidating, but Donnie barely noticed, his eyes drawn instead to the limp and bloody form held tightly against the wolf's chest, one paw hand wrapped tightly around his throat.

Donnie's heart froze even as a cry of fear and denial tore its way up his throat.

"Mikey!"

TBC

_I hope you enjoyed. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the chapter._


	24. Chapter 24

_Thank you so much to all of you who reviewed. Your kind words and encouragement really helped me through a tough time! I pushed hard to update as soon as possible as a special thank you! Thank you also to all of you who have followed and/or favorited this story. I am glad you are enjoying it and hope you continue to do so!_

* * *

Michelangelo was usually a pretty optimistic turtle. He much preferred to look at the bright side of every situation rather than the dark. Still, optimism could only take you so far, and there were definitely times when he was forced to admit a bad situation for what it was.

Take right now for instance.

Donnie had just done something to the damaged air conditioner that had sent a fireball bursting into the air over the roof. The whoosh of sound and heat had caught Mikey's attention, distracting him just long enough that he hadn't managed to fully dodge a backhanded swipe from Two Toes. Before he could fully comprehend what was happening he was flying backward through the air, landing in a bruised and battered heap several yards away, blinking up into the night sky while trying to clear the ringing from his ears and force his body back under his control.

He fully expected Two Toes to appear above him at any moment, ready to finish what he had started, but it wasn't the black wolf who reached him first. A wall of tawny brown fur suddenly filled his vision, and before he could react he felt a giant paw-hand reach down and curl around his throat. Sharp claws pierced into the soft skin in the hollow between neck and shoulder, and Mikey would have cried out if he had any air to do so.

The next thing he knew he was being lifted into the air like a rag doll by his throat, feet dangling uselessly several inches off the roof. Alpha snarled something Mikey couldn't hear properly, yanking the chucks from his hands before he even had a chance to realize what was happening. Then the wolf took two giant steps and hurled himself into the air. It wasn't until they started falling that Mikey realized Alpha had actually jumped off the roof.

He had only a few moments to fully experience the spike of pure panic that washed through him, and then they hit the ground with a bone jarring shock that sent waves of pain through every part of his abused body. Again the hand around his throat cut off any sounds of protest he might have made, but inside he was screaming in a combination of pain and fear.

_He couldn't breathe!_

A flood of adrenaline suddenly washed through him, and he began to struggle wildly, kicking out at Alpha with every ounce of strength remaining in his body, black dots dancing across his vision as his mind screamed the need for oxygen.

Alpha's only response was to flex the hand holding him, sharp claws tearing deeper until Mikey felt the hot flow of blood down his arm and across the front of his plastron. All too aware of just how close those claws were to the arteries in his neck, not to mention his jugular, he felt all the fight drain out of him, causing him to hang limp in his opponents grip once more. His vision was beginning to fade, and he knew he didn't have much longer before he blacked out completely. He didn't expect to ever wake up again once he did.

His heart thrummed a wild and desperate tempo inside his chest, fear washing through him in a ferocious tide before being replaced almost instantly with a feeling of resigned numbness. He'd always hoped that when he died, he would die with no regrets, but now, when it was finally time, he found more than a few flashing through his mind.

Suddenly the grip around his windpipe loosened just enough he was able to pull in an agonized lungful of precious air. His head swam as he gulped in the sweet oxygen, unsure how much he would be allowed. The world spun as Alpha suddenly swung him around, shifting his hold so that Mikey was now being held with his shell pressed back against the massive wolf's chest.

"You serve me better alive…for now," Alpha hissed in his ear, "but if you give me any trouble, I'll snap your neck and be done with you."

Mikey had no doubt that the wolf meant what he said, nor that he could accomplish the threat with little to no effort. He continued to breathe as deeply as the hand around his throat would allow, keeping his body still and compliant. Hopefully he would eventually be given a chance to fight for his freedom, but at the moment he was smart enough to realize that any resistance would merely earn him a quick death. He wondered what the chances were that he'd be able to escape from the wolves' clutches _twice_. Without help he figured it was pretty slim. Still, he had never been one to give up, and a small chance was better than no chance at all.

A strange snuffling sounded from above him, and it took him a moment to realize Alpha was sniffing the air. A moment later the wolf let out a low growl, his hand flexing slightly tighter on Mikey's neck, making him wince. "So he has returned," the wolf muttered, and with a spike of fear Mikey knew instantly who Alpha was referring to. Part of him silently urged Leo to get as far away from here as possible, while another part hoped his brother would come to his rescue just like he had last time.

Alpha took off at a slow jog down the alleyway, carrying Mikey with him as though he weighed no more than a sack of cotton. Every step he took jolted Mikey, sending flashes of pain through his neck and shoulders and sending fresh rivers of blood down his chest. At this rate he wasn't at all sure he would survive long enough to reach wherever Alpha was taking him. He already felt weak and lightheaded, sure symptoms of blood loss. Of course, his symptoms could just as easily be from nearly being choked to death. The iron grip around his neck, while loose enough to let him breathe, was still uncomfortably tight, making him feel trapped and claustrophobic.

A few moments later Alpha pulled to a stop, holding himself still in such a way that Mikey knew the wolf was listening. He tried to listen himself, but could hear nothing through the loud pounding of his heart echoing through his ears. Alpha started forward once more, but this time he moved slowly, creeping down the alleyway, his movements graceful and silent. When he reached the end of the alley he peeked around the corner, only to quickly draw back. In the quick flash Mikey had been granted he saw two of his brothers not far down the alleyway, standing close and talking softly.

A thrill of hope and excitement washed through him, followed just as quickly by a flash of fear. His brothers were unaware of the danger lurking just around the corner. He needed to find a way to warn them!

No sooner had the thought crossed Mikey's mind then he felt the fist around his throat tighten, once more cutting off his air supply. He began to struggle against the wolf's hold, but Alpha merely grunted, then turned and casually slammed him against the nearby alley wall with brutal force. Mikey's head met the brick in an explosion of pain, his body going limp as he struggled to hold on to consciousness. But the lack of air, combined with this new abuse to his already battered body proved to be too much. He was dimly aware of Alpha stepping forward into the alleyway, but then darkness swept forward to claim him and he knew no more.

* * *

Raph hated dueling.

He was a brawler by nature, thriving in the wild and somewhat messy fights where he faced enemies on all sides and had to rely on brute strength and instinct to get him through. Dueling was different. Dueling required a focus and concentration better suited to his older brother, and Raph wasn't too proud to admit he wasn't nearly as good at it.

Blood splattered the gray cement at his feet in a lurid mosaic, and even more coated his green skin in flowing red streams. None of the cuts littering his body were all that serious in and of themselves, but the sheer number of them were beginning to add up, and he could feel his strength waning.

Karai, on the other hand, sported much fewer nicks and cuts, and she fought with a fluid and tireless grace that Raph knew he couldn't even _hope_ to match. Not on _this_ night at any rate. He was holding his own…surviving…but that was about it.

The muffled sounds of grunts and thuds behind him told Raph that Casey was also still fighting, but he couldn't spare a glance behind him to check on his friend.

Karai's sword swept toward his face, and Raph ducked under the blade, spinning smoothly on one leg and striking out at his opponent with the other. Karai danced back from his kick, her blade flickering down and around, opening another small cut on Raph's ankle before he could fully withdraw. He regained his balance barely in time to fend off another thrust, and then another, each one seeming to come faster than the next.

Karai wasn't playing around. She was looking to end this…and quickly.

Well, Raph was just going to have to disappoint her.

Tired of playing the defensive, he threw caution to the wind and lunged forward in a desperate and daring move. He felt Karai's blade part the skin high on his arm, but he ignored the fiery pain and hot flow of blood as he punched out at the Kunoichi's face. Karai jerked her head to one side in an effort to avoid the blow, but Raph's fist still caught the edge of her jaw, sending her reeling backward. Raph didn't hesitate to press his attack, using one Sai to capture Karai's blade and twist it away from him while he struck out with the other Sai in a sharp stab aimed at his opponent's side.

If he had been battling anyone else, the fight would have been over. But this was Karai, and the Kunoichi had been training under Shredder's cruel tutelage for years. At seemingly the last possible moment she twisted away from his strike, delivering a sharp kick to his plastron even as she freed her sword with an expert flick and twist of her wrist.

And as quickly as that, Raph found himself once again on the defensive, defending against strike after strike, the ring of steel on steel sounding loudly in the cool night air. She truly was a master with the blade, and Raph knew he only had all the practice sparring against Leo to thank for the fact he was still alive. But that had only been practice, and this was for real, every slash of Karai's blade intended to end him.

Suddenly Karai paused in her attacks, a look of frustration flashing across her features. Raph blinked at her in surprise, at first not comprehending why she wasn't pressing her advantage. Then his tired brain finally registered the sounds of sirens wailing ever closer. The sound had been such a constant backdrop of noise through most of the night that he hadn't really even processed it until now. But these sirens were close, very close, and drawing nearer with ever second.

"Luck is with you this night, turtle," Karai snapped at him, and Raph took some pride in the fact the Kunoichi sounded more than a little winded. "We will meet again." She let out a soft little whistle before turning and darting away down a nearby side street, her foot soldiers quickly following behind, dragging their wounded with them.

Raph didn't have any time to celebrate his good fortune. The sirens were dangerously close, and he was standing exposed in the middle of the sidewalk. He whirled around, locating Casey standing slumped against his hockey stick a few steps away, his chest heaving as he fought to catch his breath. Raph strode over to him, grabbed his friend by his shirt, and bodily hauled him down the street and into the shadows of an alley across from where Karai and her Foot soldiers had disappeared.

They were none too soon. Barely a heartbeat passed before several cop cars tore around a nearby corner and into the street where they had just been, pulling to a screeching stop in front of the building.

It appeared someone had taken notice of whatever it was Donnie had done up on the rooftop. Nothing had exploded up there yet, which made Raph doubt anything would. It appeared it had all been a clever trick on his brother's part to clear the roof, but with the added bonus of drawing authorities to the area to investigate. He made a mental note to praise his little brother on his genius. He had likely saved them all.

"You know, I think we need to talk about this whole dragging me around by my shirt thing you've got going on buddy," Casey drawled from behind Raph. "You may have missed it, but I was blessed to be born with two working legs and the full capability to walk on my own. Just so you know."

Raph rolled his eyes, turning to face his friend even as he stepped deeper into the shadows of the alley. "Next time I'll leave your ass in the middle of the road to get run over by the cops," he retorted mildly.

Casey let out a soft oath, his eyes widening as he took in Raph's bloodied appearance for the first time. "You don't look so hot," he commented quietly, his expression concerned.

Raph merely shrugged. The truth was he didn't _feel _so hot, but he was still alive, and after everything they had just been through, he knew he was lucky to be so. He just wanted to find his brothers and get home before anything else could go wrong. Dawn wasn't too far off, and Raph wanted to be safely back in the sewers before the first light hit the streets of New York.

"Come on," he grunted, pushing past Casey to move further down the alleyway. "Let's find the others and get out of here."

He was surprised when Casey reached out and caught him by his arm, pulling him to a stop before he could go more than a few steps. "Hold up a moment," his friend ordered, releasing Raph and reaching down to grapple with the bottom of his t-shirt.

Raph frowned, not sure what his friend was doing. The next moment understanding struck as Casey neatly tore a strip of cloth from the bottom of his shirt. Casey stepped closer, motioning Raph to hold out his arm.

Raph opened his mouth to argue that they didn't have time for this, but Casey shot him a single look that told him his friend was feeling particularly stubborn. Letting out an annoyed sigh, Raph held out his arm, allowing Casey to wrap the strip of t-shirt around the most serious wound on his bicep, the cloth slowing the steady flow of blood down his arm. "You happy?" he growled as Casey finished tying off the makeshift bandage.

"Not really," Casey replied succinctly, "but I don't think I have enough shirt to bandage you up properly. Donnie's going to have a fit when he gets a look at you."

Raph grunted, suspecting his friend was probably right. Most of the cuts on his body would heal on their own, but there were more than a few that would require stitching, the worst of which the one Casey had just wrapped. He shuddered at the thought. He _hated_ needles.

"Well, if you're done playing nursemaid, I suggest we get out of here before those cops decide to start snooping around."

Casey nodded his agreement, and they both turned and hurried deeper down the alleyway, Raph removing his phone from his belt and flipping it open as he walked. It was time to find his brothers and go home.

* * *

"MIkey!"

Donnie's agonized cry hung in the stillness of the alleyway for a split second, and then he was stumbling forward, Bo staff raised, his eyes alight with a fearful anger.

Moving quickly Leo reached out and grabbed his brother's arm, pulling Donnie up short. A large part of him wanted to attack alongside his brother and free Mikey as quickly as possible, but he knew attacking Alpha now would only prove to be disastrous. It wouldn't take much for the powerful wolf to snap their brother's neck, and Leo didn't want to do anything to give him the excuse to do it.

"Donnie," he hissed softly, feeling the tight tension in the muscles beneath his hand. Donnie glanced over at him, and Leo used the brief eye contact to send a silent message urging caution. Donnie's jaw tightened, but he gave a small nod, indicating his willingness to hold back and follow Leo's lead.

Leo turned his attention back to Alpha, his heart stuttering with helpless fear at the sight of his little brother hanging limp and bloody from the pack leader's grip. "Let him go, Alpha," he ordered lowly, surprised at how calm and steady his voice sounded when inwardly he was filled with a burning anger. This was twice now that Alpha had threatened his little brother's life, and no one…_no one_…messed with Mikey.

Alpha bared his teeth at him in an angry snarl, and if anything the hand around Mikey's throat tightened. "I don't take orders from you!" he hissed. "You are the one that follows _me_! Or have you forgotten?"

Leo winced slightly, remembering all too clearly that night in Alpha's office when he had made the choice to give the pack leader his allegiance. He had been confused and afraid, and quite honestly he knew he hadn't really had a choice. Alpha would have killed him then and there if he had shown any hesitation. But the truth was, willingly or unwillingly, he had given himself to the service of the wolf pack. He had done things for them that went against the code of honor he held so dear, and the memory filled him with burning shame.

But things had been different then. _He_ had been different. And that was a direction he couldn't allow his mind to travel right now. There was too much pain there, too much regret. He needed to focus on Mikey now. That was all that mattered.

"I know you're angry, Alpha," he stated softly, lifting one hand before him in a placating gesture, hoping to ease some of the tension crackling through the air. "But it's _me_ you want, not him. Please let him go and we can talk."

Alpha cocked his head to one side, a cruel sneer drawing up the corners of his lips and revealing sharp fangs stained red with his own blood. "Talking isn't really what I want to do," he replied shortly. "I warned you what would happen if you betrayed me, Blade!"

Leo drew in a deep breath and faced the wolf squarely. "I never wanted to betray you," he stated simply, hoping Alpha would sense the truth in his words. "I was lost and confused, but things are different now. I remember who I am. I can answer your questions. Please Alpha, we don't have to be enemies." His voice came out pleading at the end, but he didn't really care. He would get down on hands and knees and _beg_ if that is what it took to save his brother.

Alpha let out a harsh little snort. "It's too late to try and talk your way out of it now, Blade. Viz saved your worthless hide and you thanked us by turning against us. It is a betrayal I will never forget…nor forgive!"

Leo shook his head, sensing he was running out of time. "They're my family, Alpha," he stated softly, hoping to appeal to any humanity left in the angry wolf before him. "If you can't forgive, fine, but if you have to punish someone, punish _me_!"

Donnie made a small noise from beside him, and Leo tightened his grip on his arm, praying his brother would keep silent.

Alpha regarded him silently for a few long moments, his head cocked slightly to one side, his eyes narrowed. But then his features hardened, and Leo suddenly knew what the wolf would do. Knew it with a crystal clarity that sent a flash of fear through his entire body.

"Oh, I _will_ punish you Blade." Alpha hissed. "I'll punish you by making you watch as I kill your family one by one, starting with this…ahhh!"

Leo hadn't waited for Alpha to finish. Faster than lightening his hand had dipped down to his belt, retrieving one of the throwing stars he had placed there before leaving the lair. With a quick flick of his wrist he sent the star sailing through the air with deadly accuracy to bury itself deeply in the center of the hand Alpha held around his brother's throat. The result was just as he had hoped. Alpha reacted to the pain instinctualy, howling and releasing Mikey to land in a boneless heap at his feet.

Leo didn't give Alpha time to recover. He darted forward, falling into a controlled slide that carried him directly past the enraged wolf. As he slid he kicked out with one foot, his strike colliding with the side of Alpha's foot in a glancing blow that threw the wolf off balance. In a blink of an eye Leo was back on his feet and taking off down the alleyway behind Alpha, narrowly avoiding a violent sweep of the wolf's claws at his back.

He was taking a terrible risk. Alpha could easily turn on Mikey and Donnie instead of coming after him, but Leo thought he knew the wolf well enough to make the gamble. Alpha might want them _all_ dead, but with him it was personal, and if there was one thing Leo knew about the pack leader it was that at his very core Alpha was driven by a deep and dark thirst for revenge. Revenge on all those he thought had somehow wronged him. Right now Leo topped that list, which made him fairly certain the wolf would come after _him_ and not his brothers.

Sure enough, he heard Alpha release a howl of pure rage, and then the scratch of claws and panting breaths as the wolf took off in pursuit after him.

Leo felt a wave of relief that was quickly drowned out by a rush of pure adrenaline, forcing speed from his legs that he didn't know he possessed. He needed to get Alpha as far away from his brothers as he could. It was doubtful he would be able to outrun the wolf in the long run, but right now that wasn't his intention. He just needed to buy Donnie enough time to get Mikey out of there. Hopefully they'd be able to meet up with Raph and Casey and get to safety before sunrise. If things turned out in his favor Leo would join up with them later, and if they didn't….well, at least his brothers would be safe. Right now that was all that mattered.

He poured out all the speed he could muster, darting down side alleys and around trash cans, not really caring where he was going as long as it was _away._ He hoped all the injuries he had seen littering Alpha's body would serve to slow the wolf down slightly, but he wasn't willing to bet his life on it. Mentally he was prepared to run for a good long time if necessary, but he wasn't entirely sure how long his stamina would hold out. He body was weak from his recent illness, not to mention his ordeal within the spirit realm, and he knew it was only a matter of time before his fatigue caught up with him.

'_I'm going to have to fight him.'_

The thought flickered through his mind unbidden, and Leo forcefully pushed it away. He would deal with that if and when it happened. Right now, he just needed to concentrate on one thing…running.

* * *

Leo had a hero's complex.

It was the only explanation Donnie could come up with to explain why his brother was constantly doing incredibly brave and stupid things in order to protect his family. It was awe inspiring and annoying as hell all at the same time.

Donnie watched as first Leo and then Alpha disappeared around a distant corner, nothing left to show that either of them had ever been there. Nothing except Mikey's crumpled form, still lying motionless where Alpha had dropped him.

It had all happened so fast.

Leo's sudden attack on Alpha had taken Donnie as much by surprise as it had the wolf leader. By the time he'd raised his weapon and stumbled a single step forward, Leo had already slid past Alpha and taken off down the far end of the alley. For a horrible moment Donnie had thought he would be left to face the pack leader on his own, but then Alpha had let out a terrible howl of anger and taken off after his brother. Which of course had been Leo's intention all along.

Now Donnie stood frozen, part of him longing to race after his older brother, but knowing he couldn't leave Mikey alone. He was getting a little tired of this familiar feeling of frustrated helplessness…of being torn in two different directions. He decided then and there that as soon as he could he was going to find a way to clone himself so that he would never have to feel it again.

With a muttered curse, he lurched forward to fall to his knees beside Mikey, his heart racing with intense worry for Leo. If he got himself hurt…

'_No! We just got him back. Nothing's going to happen to him. Nothing!'_

Choking down his fear and worry for his oldest brother, Donnie reached out and gently rolled Mikey onto his shell, his heart giving a wild lurch as he looked down at his brother's pale and bloodied features. He immediately located four deep puncture wounds in the hollow between his brother's neck and shoulder, the cuts the source of all the blood covering Mikey's arm and chest. He leaned forward to better inspect the wounds, and that was when he made a horrible discovery.

Mikey wasn't breathing.

For a terrible second Donnie found himself frozen once more, distantly wondering just how much more terror his heart could handle this night. Then he was moving again, his fingers almost frantically feeling around Mikey's throat, sliding through hot blood as he felt for any shift and give that would indicate his brother's neck was broken or his windpipe crushed. If either were the case, he knew there would be absolutely nothing he could do.

To his immense relief his fingers encountered only bruised and swollen skin, nothing indicating the damage was beyond repair. He also detected a pulse, faint and fading, but proof that his brother's heart was still beating.

There was still hope.

His phone rang, loud and jarring in the otherwise silent alleyway. Donnie fumbled at his belt, retrieving the phone and sparing a half glance at the display before opening it and lifting it to his ear. "Raph, I need you," he blurted, distantly aware of the thin note of panic in his voice.

There was a pause on the other end of the line, and then Raph's voice came back, low and tense. _"Where are you Donnie?"_

Donnie opened his mouth to reply, then choked as he realized he didn't have an answer for his brother. He hadn't been paying much attention as Leo had hurried him away from the rooftop, and now he had no idea where he was. "I…I don't know," he stammered, his panic growing, blocking out rational thought.

Raph let out a small growl. _"Don't worry about it, Donnie. I'll use that tracker thingy you showed us on the phone. We're on our way."_

"Hurry," Donnie gasped, his relief tempered by the wild fear coursing through him. "Mikey's not breathing." He dropped the phone then, returning his attention to his little brother, knowing he had to act quickly if he wanted to save him.

With shaky fingers he reached out and tipped Mikey's head back, covering his brother's nose before leaning down and blowing a long breath into his mouth. He repeated this again, and then again, a silent mantra replaying over and over again inside his head.

'_Come on, Mikey! Come on. Please little brother, you have to start breathing for me. Come on! Breathe!'_

He was unsure how many times he forced breath down into his little brother's lungs, but suddenly Mikey let out a weak little cough, his body jerking slightly. Donnie had one hand in the middle of Mikey's plastron, so he felt it when his brother pulled in his first full lungful of air on his own. He waited in tense expectation, only breathing out a relieved sigh when the movement was repeated a second and then a third time, slow and steady. Donnie fumbled at Mikey's neck again, closing his eyes in relief as he immediately located a pulse, still weak but growing steadily stronger. Beneath him, Mikey's eyelids fluttered slightly, and he let out a soft moan, but he didn't fully waken.

Donnie sank back onto his heels, his entire body slumping with a combination of relief and exhaustion. He knew he still needed to take care of the cuts on his brother's neck before he lost any more blood, but he allowed himself a few precious seconds to merely celebrate the fact that Mikey was alive and breathing. He didn't even want to _think_ about what would have happened if his brother's heart had failed as well as his lungs. The thick plastron covering their chests made for awesome natural armor, but it also would have kept him from giving very effective CPR.

A scrambling sound at the far end of the alleyway had him jerking upright, his hand reaching for his staff where he had dropped it beside him. He was halfway to his feet when Raph came tearing into view, practically sprinting down the alley toward Donnie, Casey trailing a few paces behind him. There was raw fear in Raph's expression, and he charged forward with both Sais in his hands, his gaze frantically searching the alleyway all around them for potential danger.

Donnie dropped back down to his knees, surprised by the sudden wave of weariness that had him wanting to do nothing more than to sink down to the cold pavement and sleep for a week. He was so tired, and his body ached all over, but he knew the night was far from over. He felt a little like that girl from the _Wizard of Oz _movie Mikey had made him watch when they were younger_..._he just wanted to tap his heels together and fly home.

And how tired was he really to have _that_ mental image in his head?

Raph dropped to the ground beside him, breathing heavily, and Donnie noted with a frown that his brother was literally covered in a barrage of nicks and cuts, painting his body a morbid mosaic of green and red. Raph seemed hardly aware of the injuries, however, his gaze flying immediately to Mikey's prone form.

"Is he breathing?" he gasped, the panic in his voice mirroring that in Donnie's earlier.

Donnie nodded wearily, then noted his brother wasn't looking at him and so added aloud, "Yeah, he's breathing."

Casey arrived then, skidding to a halt behind Raph, his face flushed with exertion. Donnie gave him a brief nod of greeting before asking, "Casey, can I have your shirt?"

Casey blinked at him in confusion, and Donnie gestured toward Mikey. "He has some nasty gashes on his neck, and I don't have any bandages on me. I need to get the bleeding under control or he might not make it home."

"Of course," Casey gasped, still breathing hard from his run. He stripped from the shirt quickly, handing it over with a slightly crooked grin. "I've already donated some to the cause, might as well make it all."

Donnie took the shirt gratefully, turning back to Mikey. After a moment's consideration he merely balled the cloth up and pressed all of it to the gashes on his brother's neck. It was far from perfect, but it would slow the bleeding until they could get home and Donnie could properly clean and care for the wound. From the looks of it he would have quite a bit of stitching to do when they got home, and not just on Mikey. Raph looked like had gotten into a fight with a cheese grater and lost.

"What happened, Donnie?" Raph asked, his Sais still in hand and his gaze roving warily between his unconscious brother and the alleyway around them, his body held tense and ready.

Donnie grimaced. "Alpha," he answered shortly. "He had Mikey by the throat. Must have cut off his air supply long enough that his lungs stopped working. I got him back though. His throat will be sore for a while, but I don't expect any permanent damage. The cuts on the side of his neck are deep, but from the looks of it they missed anything vital. I think he'll be fine."

Raph let out a low growl, his hands flexing tighter around the handles of his Sais, his eyes still roaming about the alley restlessly, as though he was afraid to look at Mikey too closely. "How come he's not waking up then?" he asked, and though his tone was rough, Donnie could pick up the undertone of fear in his brother's voice. He couldn't really blame Raph. Last time Mikey was unconscious like this, they had almost lost their little brother.

"He really is okay, Raph," Donnie reassured quietly. "My guess is he's simply exhausted. He's been through a lot tonight…we _all_ have. His body has just shut down for a while to help him recover, that's all."

Raph bit his lip, his gaze finally shifting to rest on Mikey more fully, his expression one of doubt and concern. "You sure?" he asked softly, this time not even bothering to try and hide his worry.

Donnie nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure."

Raph pulled in a deep breath, then nodded, some of the tension in his form easing. He cast a quick glance behind him at Casey then turned his attention back to Donnie. "Okay, we need to get out of here. We'll stick to the streets until we reach familiar territory and then go underground. Donnie, you scout our way ahead. Casey, you watch our rear. I'll carry Mikey."

"Got it," Casey rumbled, but Donnie was already shaking his head.

"We can't leave yet," he told Raph quietly. "Not without Leo."

Raph frowned at him, his eyes narrowing. "What do you mean?" he asked lowly, a hint of dread in his voice, like he really didn't want to hear the answer but knew he had to.

Donnie grimaced. "Leo's here, Raph. He's the reason we got away from Alpha. He led him away from us. We can't leave until we find him."

Raph stared at him mutely for several long moments before closing his eyes and drawing in another deep breath, as though mentally steadying himself. "What the hell is he _doing_ here?" he grated out roughly, his eyes snapping open once more, full of worry and frustration. "He's supposed to be at home!"

Donnie could only shrug wearily. "I don't know," he replied softly. "But he saved Mikey's life." He thought about mentioning that Leo had also saved Raph, but he supposed that could wait for another time. His brother looked shell shocked enough as it was.

Raph's jaw tightened, but he nodded grimly, his expression firming. "Okay, here's what we're going to do," he stated determinedly. "Donnie and Casey, you're going to start home with Mikey. Take it slow and easy, and keep a sharp eye out. This place is crawling with cops. I think Karai has pulled out for the day, but who knows where the rest of our mutant friends have gone. And don't forget there's still pockets of Dragons and Wolf gangsters roaming around. Do everything you can to avoid detection. I'm going to find Leo, and then we're going to be coming right behind you."

Donnie bit his lip, shaking his head slightly, hating the idea of splitting up again. "Raph...," he started hesitantly.

"I'm not leaving him," Raph cut him off, his voice tight and strained. "Not again…not _ever_ again!"

"Of course not," Donnie muttered. "That's not…" he trailed off, not exactly sure how to put his disquiet into words. There was a tight ball of apprehension churning in his gut, making him feel queasy and anxious. He didn't want to leave without Leo any more than Raph did. Unfortunately all of them going after him was not really an option. Hauling Mikey around would slow them down too much, and if they were forced to fight their little brother would be too vulnerable. As much as he hated to admit it, he knew Raph's plan was the best one.

So why did it feel like he was abandoning his brother all over again?

As if reading his thoughts, Raph reached out and laid a heavy hand on his shoulder. "I'm going to find him and bring him home," he stated softly, nothing but iron determination in his voice. "Trust me, Donnie. We'll be right behind you."

Donnie nodded silently, unable to speak past the tight knot in his throat. Raph squeezed his shoulder once tightly before pushing to his feet, unable to hide a slight grimace as the sudden movement pulled at the cuts and bruises covering his body.

"Maybe I should go with you?" Casey offered, the concern on his own face unmistakable.

Raph shook his head. "It's going to take all of Donnie's focus just to carry Mikey. I need you to watch their backs for me…get them home safely. Can you do that?"

Casey nodded, his expression serious. "Of course," he muttered softly. "Just make sure you watch your own back, okay?"

Raph grunted his agreement, then turned and moved silently but quickly back down the alley, disappearing into the night without another word. Donnie stared after him for a moment, his heart beating a wild tempo inside his chest. Then he looked up at Casey and gave a short nod, indicating he was ready to go as well.

If he hadn't been so tired, so distracted by worry over his absent brothers, he might have sensed the eyes watching his every move from above, or the dark shadow that silently followed as they left the alley and headed for home.

TBC

_Phew. That was fun. Hang on tight. Things are going to be a little tense for the next couple of chapters._

_Love to hear your thoughts!_


	25. Chapter 25

_Thank you everyone for the reviews, favorites and follows. They mean so much to me!_

_Hope you enjoy this chapter…_

* * *

Mikey was getting heavy.

Donnie let out a small grunt as he adjusted his brother's weight for the hundredth time, seeking some relief of muscles pulled and strained to their absolute limit. His injured arm ached and throbbed with burning persistence, but he had no choice but to ignore it and move on.

Even worse than his physical discomfort was the worry and dread that had invaded his mind, filling his thoughts with morbid pictures he couldn't seem to force away no matter how hard he tried. He kept envisioning Leo and Raph, their broken bodies lying discarded and bloody in some back alleyway, their sightless eyes staring up at the sky. The mental image was enough to make him feel physically ill, his stomach churning with apprehension and fear.

It was a good thing Casey was scouting the way before them, because Donnie could barely pull his thoughts together enough to pay attention to where they were going, let alone avoid any obstacles or people that might get in their way. A single thought kept repeating itself over and over again within his mind.

_What if they don't come home?_

Donnie wasn't sure he could go through that again…the tearing grief and loss that had literally left him feeling shattered into pieces. By some miracle he had managed to roughly glue himself back together into a semblance of his old self, but he didn't think he could do it again if the worst happened all over. It was in times like these that he could almost…_almost_…regret how close and interdependent their family was. True, it was that closeness that had gotten them through seventeen years of living in the sewers as outcast mutants, but sometimes that bond also _hurt_. A lot.

Dawn was just beginning to lighten the Eastern horizon when they finally reached familiar territory and were able to retreat to the safety of the sewers. Donnie couldn't help but breathe out a sigh of relief as they moved underground, drawing some comfort from the familiar stone walls surrounding them. They were still several miles from home, but at least now they could move more freely and quickly. Casey dropped back to help carry some of Mikey's weight, for which Donnie was incredibly grateful. He could tell he was nearing the end of his endurance. They walked mostly in silence, reserving their energy for simply moving forward, Donnie occasionally speaking up to direct them down one path or another.

They had just entered a large room—the center taken up by a deep drainage shaft, the sound of swiftly running water echoing up from somewhere far below—when Mikey let out a low moan, shifting slightly in their hold. It was the first sound he had made since they had begun the journey home, and Donnie quickly turned his focus to his little brother. A few moments later Mikey moaned again, shifting even more, and Donnie caught Casey's eye, an unspoken agreement passing between them. Together they carried Mikey to the edge of the room, lowering him down gently against the far wall.

Donnie immediately checked the makeshift bandage on his brother's neck, noting with relief that it was holding well and not yet soaked with blood, a good indication that the bleeding was under control if not yet stopped. Mikey let out another groan, his head rolling from side to side against the stone wall, his eyelids fluttering. A second later his eyes slowly flickered open, revealing sky blue irises filled with a mixture of pain and confusion.

"Hey Mikey," Donnie greeted softly, giving his little brother a small smile. Despite his earlier assurances to Raph, he still felt overwhelmingly relieved to see Mikey conscious once more.

Mikey blinked at him groggily for a moment before his eyes shifted over to take in Casey and then the large underground room beyond. Finally his gaze traveled back to Donnie. "Hey D," he whispered, causing Donnie to wince at how rough and gravelly his brother's voice sounded. "Why is Casey naked?"

Donnie blinked at the abrupt question, then couldn't help but let out a short but heartfelt laugh, the sound of it carrying away some of the tension he had been carrying with him for the last several hours. Leave it to Mikey to have _that_ be the first question he asked after waking up.

Casey let out a small snort. "I'm not _naked_," he objected mildly. "I've just donated my shirt to a higher cause. I've still got my pants on."

"Oh, that's good," Mikey whispered, his voice still sounding like it was being forced out through a meat grinder. A small frown appeared between his eyes. "My neck hurts, Donnie?" he mumbled, one hand drifting up to finger the wad of bandages pressed there. "And it hurts to talk."

Donnie nodded sympathetically. "I bet. Just take it easy, Mikey. We're almost home and I'll have you fixed up in no time. In the meantime, try not to talk"

Mikey's frown deepened. "What happened," he grated out, completely ignoring Donnie's last order. "How'd I get free from Alpha?"

Donnie hesitated, debating internally for a brief second before shaking his head and answering his brother softly. "It's a bit of a long story, Mikey. How bout we just focus on getting you home, and then I can tell you all about it as I patch you up?" He suspected Mikey's reaction to learning both Leo and Raph were still out there somewhere would not be a very pretty one, and he wanted to spare his brother the worry for at least a while longer.

Mikey looked reluctant, but a sudden coughing fit kept him from putting up any kind of argument. Donnie cringed as he listened to the rough hacking, wishing he at least had some water to give his brother. Judging from the bruises and swelling he could see on the outside of Mikey's neck, he knew his brother's throat had to be killing him.

Once Mikey had caught his breath, Donnie reached out and grabbed one of his brother's arms, Casey mirroring him on the other side. Together they hauled him back to his feet, holding him steady as he swayed dangerously between them.

"M' dizzy," he muttered, blinking his eyes and giving his head a soft shake.

"Blood loss," Donnie replied succinctly, hiding his worry under a brisk tone. "Just lean on us, Mikey. We'll help you home."

Together they began to shuffle their way forward toward the far side of the room, still moving slowly, but a bit easier now that Mikey was supporting at least some of his weight. They hadn't gone far when Donnie suddenly pulled to a stop, an uneasy feeling crawling up his spine. He glanced behind him toward the tunnel they had come from, searching the dark shadows for…he wasn't sure what. There was nothing there he could see, but instead of feeling better his sense of unease only grew, instincts screaming out a silent warning.

"Donnie?" Casey questioned after several seconds had passed without them moving. "What is it?"

Donnie just shook his head, uncertain how to explain his sudden sense of disquiet. It felt almost as though they were being watched, though the chances of someone being this deep in the sewers was slim to none. He supposed it could just be the stress of the evening finally getting to him, but something told him it was more than that. He couldn't tear his gaze away from the tunnel entrance, his hands itching to free his Bo staff from its spot on his back. But he couldn't grab the staff without dropping Mikey, and he was hesitant to do that only to have this turn out to be nothing but the overactive imaginings of his tired mind.

The seconds stretched on and still Donnie couldn't shake his sense of foreboding. Yet nothing moved in the dark mouth of the tunnel, and the need to get Mikey home soon began to battle with his sense of caution. He really was very tired, and perhaps his mind was merely playing tricks on him.

He was about to turn and continue on when the barest flash of light suddenly caught his eye. The brief glint reminded him instantly of the way a rat's eyes would reflect back the dim light of the tunnel as it scavenged for food. But this flash had appeared far too high on the wall to be a rat, and with a sudden surge of fear he suddenly understood what his senses had been warning him of.

"Casey!" he shouted, his voice echoing around the cavernous room. "It's here!"

That was all the time he had to warn his friend. The words weren't even completely out of his mouth before a black shape unfurled from the shadows deep in the tunnel and hurled itself forward with impossible speed. Donnie's first thought was for his injured brother, and he hauled Mikey backward out of the path of the oncoming wolf even as Casey stepped forward, hand reaching for the handle of one of his hockey sticks.

The vigilante never had a chance to finish drawing his weapon. With a tremendous leap that covered ten yards, the black wolf launched itself forward, swiping out with a single powerful blow even as it landed. Casey went flying to the side, a short shout of alarm echoing from his throat before he tumbled to the edge of the drainage shaft and disappeared over the edge.

Donnie stared at the place Casey had disappeared, for a split second completely frozen by shock and horror. But he didn't have time to process the loss of their human friend, because Two Toes was now bounding towards him, a feral light gleaming in his dark eyes. With a silent apology Donnie shoved Mikey away from him as hard as he could, even as he leapt in the opposite direction, his hand going to the handle of his Bo and whipping it out from its place on his back.

He was none too soon. Even as he brought the weapon flying around in front of him Two Toes was on him, all snarling teeth and sharp claws. Donnie's Bo staff caught the wolf high on the shoulder with all the speed and force he could muster, throwing Two Toes off balance just enough Donnie was able to duck away beneath his wild lunge.

He spun backwards, attempting to put some space between himself and the enraged wolf, but Two Toes followed with a howl that echoed frighteningly from the stone walls around them. With no time for anything else, Donnie squared his stance and met the wolf head on, already knowing he was no match for the sheer size and power of the creature. He was able to keep Two Toes from mauling him with his claws by sweeping out with his staff, but the wolf still barreled into him, the force of impact lifting him from his feet and hurling him backwards against the tunnel wall.

He hit at an angle, his left shoulder taking the brunt of impact. He felt something pop, followed by a fiery wave of pain up and down his arm. He nearly dropped his Bo, but was able to hold on to it with his right hand even as his left completely failed him. But he wasn't able to bring the weapon to bear as Two Toes pressed in on him, his jaws dipping down toward Donnie's unprotected throat. Donnie acted on instinct, striking out with the fist still gripping the Bo, landing a sharp punch directly to the wolf's sensitive nose.

Two Toes let out a yelp, jerking backwards, and Donnie used the opportunity to roll away further down the wall. He heart was pounding with terror, his left arm hanging limp and useless at his side. He knew he could wield the Bo with just one arm, but not with anywhere near enough power to take down his opponent.

With a small shake of his head, Two Toes began to stalk forward once more, his dark eyes gleaming with the sure promise of death. Donnie back-peddled, trying desperately to think of some way out of this awful mess.

A sudden shout of anger filled the room, a shape hurtling from the darkness behind Two Toes. "Leave my brother alone!" Mikey cried hoarsely, landing on the wolf's back and wrapping both forearms around Two Toes' neck. Taken completely by surprise, Two Toes twisted and bucked, stumbling about the room as he attempted to dislodge the turtle on his back. But Mikey clung to him with desperate strength, his face a mask of determination as he held on for dear life.

As the wolf stumbled closer to the drainage shaft, Donnie was struck with a sudden idea. Fighting back against the waves of pain from his injured arm, he leapt forward, using Two Toes' distraction to dart in close before the wolf was aware of his presence. Using his staff for balance and support, Donnie launched a vicious side kick straight at the wolf's chest. Already unbalanced by Mikey, the wolf was unprepared for the attack and stumbled backwards, straight toward the edge of the shaft.

"Down Mikey!" Donnie screamed.

Mikey responded instantly, twisting his body sharply to the side to further pull Two Toes off balance before suddenly releasing him, dropping to the ground. Donnie was there immediately, striking out a second time, this time with his Bo staff, sweeping the weapon high, straight at Two Toes' head. The wolf leapt back to avoid the blow, only to find himself teetering dangerously on the edge of the drainage shaft. With a loud shout, Donnie swept his staff down and low, jabbing out lightning quick to strike the top of Two Toes' left foot.

The blow itself wasn't all that powerful, but its effect certainly was. Two Toes let out another yelp, his arms pin-wheeling as he fought to keep his balance. But it was no use, and Donnie watched wide eyed as the wolf tumbled backwards, disappearing over the edge of the shaft with a final, echoing howl. A second later there was a loud splash from somewhere far below and the howl abruptly cut off.

The sudden silence that descended over the room was almost deafening. Donnie could only stand staring at the place the wolf had disappeared, breathing hard, his tired mind struggling to comprehend everything that had just transpired. It had all happened so quickly!

A soft moan from behind him pulled him from his stupor, and he quickly turned to find his brother. Mikey was kneeling a few feet away, one hand pressed up against his neck where the bandage had begun to fall away, fresh blood bubbling up between his fingers to trickle down his arm and across his plastron. Donnie hurried over to him, wincing in pain as he dropped down next to his brother. He batted Mikey's hand out of the way before replacing the now blood soaked shirt against the cuts and pressing down tightly.

Mikey looked up, his wide blue eyes meeting Donnie's, his face pale and drawn. "Casey?" he gasped, unmistakable dread filling his voice.

Donnie felt his heart lurch, his gaze drifting unbidden back to the steep drainage shaft, grief and regret swelling inside his chest until he found it difficult to breathe. If only he had listened to his instincts from the start, maybe he could have given Casey more warning. Their friend might still be alive, and Donnie wouldn't be forced to go home and figure out a way to tell April the man she loved was gone forever.

His body began to tremble, but he was unable to do anything about it. Too much pain. Too much grief. Too much worry and exhaustion. He felt like he was coming apart at the seams, with nothing to hold him together. It was only when Mikey reached out and grabbed his shoulder that he realized he was listing heavily to one side, in very real danger of pitching down onto the hard stone floor. His brother called his name sharply, his grip on Donnie's shoulder tight and unyielding, the physical touch helping to ground him until he could find his balance once more.

Mikey stared at him worriedly, eyes shining bright with unshed tears, his expression raw with his own grief and pain. Looking back at him, Donnie struggled to find something to say, but before he could think of anything an echoing voice drifted up from the mouth of the shaft.

"A little help here, please."

Donnie's breath caught in his throat, his look of utter shock mirrored in Mikey's face across from him. They sat frozen for half a heartbeat before both of them lurched to their feet, injuries temporarily forgotten as they staggered to the edge of the drainage shaft and looked down.

The rough and tumble flow of water was barely visible fifty feet below them, but that wasn't what drew their attention. Half way down the shaft there were a series of several small drainage culverts cut into the wall, their entrances looking like tiny black holes in the gray stone, each one releasing a trickle of water from its mouth to add to the raging river flowing by down below. In the opening directly below them Casey Jones sat wedged in the tiny gap, his neck craned as he looked up at them.

"Casey!"

Mikey's cry of joy reverberated around the room even as Donnie let out his own loud whoop filled with happy relief. He had no idea how Casey had managed to survive his plunge down into the shaft, but at the moment he didn't really care. Their friend was alive, and the simple truth of that was a shot of pure adrenaline, bolstering his flagging strength and causing his mouth to stretch in a wide grin despite the pain and fatigue of his battered body.

"Hold on Casey," he called down to their friend

"I'm holding on," Casey called back up to them, "but I'd kinda like to get out of here. I'm getting soaked!"

Donnie quickly assessed the situation, shaking his head slightly as he came to an unwelcome conclusion. Casey was at least twenty feet down, putting him well out of their reach even if he hung over the edge and extended his Bo Staff. Even if they could have reached him, Donnie didn't think he would have the strength to pull him up…not with his injured shoulder.

"Casey, do you think you can climb up?" Donnie yelled, eyeing the rough stone walls that made up the sides of the shaft. They were uneven and jagged, offering plenty of hand and footholds. But Casey was not a ninja trained in these types of things, and a simple mistake could easily cost him his life. It would have been different if they had some sort of rope to secure him with, but they didn't have anything on them.

Casey was eyeing the walls around him with a doubtful expression. "I don't know," he finally called up. "I pulled something in my arm catching the lip of this culvert. It might not hold my weight well."

Donnie nodded in understanding. "Okay, the lair's not too far away. I'm going to take Mikey home, get some rope, and then I'll come back for you."

Casey's shoulders slumped a little, but he nodded in agreement, shifting slightly so he was wedged a little deeper in the tiny opening. "Fine," he called up, his tone disgruntled. "Just hurry. You know I get bored easily."

Donnie smiled tiredly, pulling back from the edge of the shaft and turning to Mikey. "Come on," he urged, offering his uninjured arm to Mikey for support. "Let's get home."

Mikey hesitated, glancing down at the shaft. "Maybe I should stay here with him while you go?" he suggested wearily.

Donnie immediately shook his head. "I need to get you home and get a pressure bandage on those cuts, Mikey. You've already lost too much blood. Don't worry, he's wedged in there good. He's not going anywhere."

Mikey still looked reluctant, but Donnie didn't give him a chance to argue any further, reaching for his brother and hauling him up against his uninjured side, biting back a small groan at the fiery pain emanating from his left side. He was pretty sure his shoulder was dislocated, but there wasn't anything he could do about that until he got home and had Master Splinter's help.

He winced slightly as he thought about their father's reaction when they showed up in the lair bruised and bloody and only _two. _ He hoped the shock of it wouldn't be too much for the aging rat. He would need Splinter's help to get everything done that needed done.

With a determined grunt he set off toward the tunnel that would lead them home, hoping against hope that the worst this day had to bring was already behind them.

* * *

Dawn was just beginning to brighten the eastern horizon when Leonardo's strength finally failed him. It could have been some unseen obstacle tripping him up, or maybe his legs just gave out on him, but before he knew it he was down on his knees on the hard rooftop of an old furniture warehouse, doubled over as he fought desperately to catch his breath. He tried a couple of times to push himself back up and continue on, but his body was simply too weary, and he couldn't find the strength to regain his feet.

He had been running for a long time, weaving in and out of back alleyways and along deserted streets before finally taking the chase back up to the rooftops, where there was less chance of accidentally running into innocent civilians. He had managed to put some distance between himself and his pursuer, but instinct told him Alpha was still out there, following him with dogged persistence.

Under normal conditions Leo would have had no trouble giving the wolf leader a merry chase all around New York City. But not tonight. Raph and Splinter had been right, his body was still too weak to handle everything he was asking of it. He had reached the end of his endurance, and now he would have no choice but to stand his ground and face what was coming.

It was not a comforting thought.

Taking a deep breath, he mustered what little strength remained him and managed to push himself to his feet. His limbs trembled with fatigue, but he ignored it as he turned to face the way he had come. Thoughts of his family filled his tired mind before he forcefully pushed them aside, knowing he couldn't afford the distraction they would bring. He could only hope that his brothers had made it home safely, and that he would somehow have a chance to see them again. There was so much he wanted to tell them.

But that would have to come later…_if _he survived.

He pulled his swords from their sheaths on his back, reveling in the combined weight that felt so comfortable…so _right_…in his hands. After six months apart the twin blades had finally been united, and he drew strength from the familiar feel of the worn leather against his palms. The shaking in his limbs subsided and a quiet calmness settled over him. He twirled the blades expertly a single time before settling into an easy stance to wait, blade tips pointed downward toward the rooftop.

He didn't have to wait long.

Alpha appeared less than a minute later, leaping from a nearby roof and landing heavily barely ten yards in front of where Leo was standing. He was panting heavily, the cut across his muzzle still leaking blood down the front of his fur covered chest, his body hunched in upon itself in a way that indicated he was in pain. But his eyes were alight with a bloodthirsty fire, and as he faced off with Leo he drew himself up to his full height, staring down at the turtle with cold fury. Somewhere along the way he had grabbed a thick metal pole, the makeshift weapon easily as tall as Leo was and with a width as big as his wrist. One end of the pole had been warped and twisted sharply, as though it had been yanked with force from its resting place.

"So, the rabbit has finally stopped running and decided to meet his fate," Alpha hissed, glaring down at Leo.

Leo sighed. "We don't have to do this, Alpha," he replied quietly, trying one last time to reason with the wolf, already knowing it wouldn't do any good.

Alpha growled low in his throat, the sound sending shivers down Leo's spine. "Scared?" he taunted, flexing his massive muscles and baring his teeth in a macabre parody of a grin. "You should be."

Leo gave a resigned shake of his head and chose not to answer. Talking wouldn't change Alpha's mind about anything, and in truth Leo was ready to have this done and over with. Twice this night he had looked death straight in the face, first in the Spirit Realm and now on this rooftop. It was strange, but this time it felt easier. Perhaps it was because he was too exhausted and numb from all that had happened to feel fear, or maybe it was simply because this time he would at least have a chance to fight back…to defend himself. Death was death, but this still seemed better somehow.

He lifted his swords and shifted his stance slightly, indicating without words that he was ready to begin.

Alpha didn't need any more invitation than that. He lept forward with a snarl, sweeping the metal pole out before him and knocking both of Leo's swords to one side, clearing the way for his mad charge. Leo spun away, adrenaline lending his tired body the speed it needed to avoid being crushed beneath the fury of the massive wolf. With speed and precision born from long hours of practice he struck out with his swords even as he moved, the blades scoring through fur and flesh, their tips shining with dark red blood.

If Alpha noticed the new injuries, he didn't show it. He merely spun to face Leo once more, lashing out with the heavy pole in a double-handed swing. Leo ducked out of the way, feeling the pole whistle past his head with a speed and strength that would have surely left his skull crushed beyond recognition if it had landed. His first reaction was to back away out of the pole's reach, but he ignored that and instead ducked in closer to his opponent, slashing out in a quick strike toward Alpha's stomach. The wolf was caught off guard by the bold move and barely avoided the sweep of Leo's sword, jerking backward at the last moment.

Leo wasn't given any time to take advantage of Alpha's loss of balance as the wolf turned his stumble into a swift pivot that allowed him to bring his improvised weapon to bear once more. This time there was no avoiding the incoming sweep of the pole, and Leo was forced to bring both his swords up and to the side to block the strike. Metal struck against metal in a shower of sparks, and Leo felt the impact through his entire body. If Alpha had been able to put his full strength behind the blow there would have been no way he could have stopped it, but the wolf was still off balance, and the strike had been awkward and clumsy.

In the split second their weapons hung locked together, Leo twisted and sent a quick snap kick toward Alpha's unprotected side. The wolf was unable to dodge the blow and it landed with enough force to send him stumbling back a few steps, a guttural snarl bubbling between his teeth. Had he been a human the kick would have broken ribs, but his fur and thick layer of muscle provided him enough protection to avoid serious injury, and when Leo tried to press the attack, he was forced back by a vicious swipe of Alpha's claws.

Leo retreated out of reach, and Alpha didn't immediately come after him. The two regarded each other for a long moment, both breathing hard from their brief but ferocious encounter. Leo used the small respite to consider his options. If he kept his distance Alpha would be able to come after him with the metal pole, forcing him to constantly dodge and maneuver to avoid being clobbered, a scenario that would wear him out in no time. If he fought in close where Alpha couldn't effectively use the pole, he would be inhibiting the effectiveness of his own weapons, while simultaneously placing himself dangerously close to the wolf's tearing jaws and claws.

Neither option was ideal, but he wasn't given any more time to consider as Alpha swept in for another attack, predictably leading with a strong swing of his pole. Leo darted back and to the side, easily avoiding the blow, but then in a move he wouldn't have thought possible, Alpha reversed his swing mid-strike, the pole suddenly traveling in the opposite direction it had just been. Leo had no time to duck away, and the pole caught him in the side, the blow powerful enough to lift him off his feet and send him flying across the rooftop.

He landed in a dazed heap, somehow managing to hold on to his swords. His plastron had protected him from the full force of the blow, but he still felt a fiery pain radiating from his side with every breath. From where he lay he could see Alpha bounding forward across the rooftop toward him, dark eyes shining with malicious triumph. Instead of trying to rise to meet him, Leo merely curled over on his side, working to breathe slow and evenly past the pain.

In the blink of an eye Alpha was standing over him, pole lifted in a double handed grip high over his head, bloody teeth bared as he prepared to deliver the killing blow. Leo didn't give him the chance, uncurling from his position with all the speed and force he could muster, driving both feet into Alpha's leg, right at the knee joint. Alpha's let out a howl as his leg gave out beneath him, sending him toppling off balance.

In the blink of an eye Leo was back on his feet, his swords flashing out. He aimed for Alpha's right arm first, the one holding the pole, his blade cutting deeply into the back of the wolf's already injured hand. Blood sprayed in a morbid arc, and Alpha dropped the weapon with a scream of pain. Leo's swords were already moving again, sweeping up and around until they crossed, forming an x with the tips resting on either side of Alpha's neck.

Everything froze.

Alpha's dark eyes met his own, and the pure hatred radiating from their depths caught Leo off guard. But there was something else there as well, a hint of madness that Leo had caught glimpses of before but had never seen displayed so openly. The wolf held himself very still, unable to do anything else with the sharp blades pressed to either side of his throat, but he still managed to cast Leo an angry sneer.

"Do it," he hissed, spitting blood from his mouth, his teeth bared in a defiant snarl.

In that instant Leo knew if he let Alpha live, the wolf would never stop hunting him…hunting his family. All it would take was a quick jerk of his wrists and he could open up Alpha's throat and end the threat permanently. It wouldn't be the first time he had killed in order to protect those he loved. But something made him hesitate. He didn't _want_ to kill Alpha. Whatever the wolf's motives might have been, he had taken Leo in when he'd been injured and alone. He couldn't help but feel that he _owed_ Alpha, no matter the fact the pack leader had just been trying to kill him.

Alpha's eyes flickered slightly off to one side, and that was the only warning Leo got that they were no longer alone on the rooftop. His instincts screamed a warning half a second too late, and he barely managed to turn before something slammed into him from the side with the force of a freight train, driving him to the ground with bone jarring force. He felt something shift in his already bruised side, and the spike of agony that followed drove what little air was left in his lungs out in a short, harsh gasp.

It took him a moment to gather his wits, but once he did he realized it was Viz who had blindsided him and knocked him to the ground. The gray wolf was practically sitting on him, holding him pinned firmly, his clawed hands wrapped tightly around Leo's wrists, holding his arms splayed out to either side of him, swords still gripped firmly in both fists. Viz stared down at him with a steady gaze, his expression remote, but Leo thought he detected a glimmer of something sad and resigned in his old friend's face.

"I'm sorry," Viz murmured softly, the words for Leo's ears only. "I cannot let you kill him."

Still fighting to breathe, Leo struggled to come up with something to say to his friend, but he wasn't given a chance. Alpha suddenly loomed in his vision, one side of his neck bloody where Leo's sword must have nicked him when Viz shoved him aside. Without a word Alpha leaned down and tore the sword from his right hand, then straightened and without warning drove the blade down through the middle of Leo's forearm, the tip tearing through flesh and past bone before burying itself several inches in the gravel rooftop below.

Leo's arm erupted in fiery pain, and he couldn't hold back a strained cry, his teeth clenching together tightly as he fought for air.

"Alpha!" Viz's voice was sharp, and some of his weight eased from Leo's form, making it slightly easier to draw in a full breath. "I bring important news."

Completely ignoring Viz, Alpha stalked around to Leo's left side and once more leaned down to tear the sword from the trapped turtle's hand. Leo fought to hold on to it, but Alpha was too powerful, and a moment later the wolf was standing over him once more, the malicious gleam in his eye telling Leo exactly what was going to happen next.

Viz started to say something more, but Alpha didn't give him a chance, lifting the second sword high and driving it down, this time through Leo's upper arm, the blade once more piercing all the way through flesh and muscle to bury deep into the rooftop below. Even knowing what was coming Leo couldn't stop the scream from tearing free from his throat, his entire body arcing beneath Viz's hold.

Suddenly the weight on him lifted as Viz released him and abruptly stood, placing himself between Alpha and Leo, forestalling any other immediate attacks. Leo might have been able to use the opportunity to escape if he weren't currently pinned to the roof with his own swords, fighting to simply remain conscious in the face of the pulsing agony radiating from both arms.

"Did you hear me, Alpha?" Viz demanded harshly. "I bring news of the rest of the pack. Talon and Two Toes are both missing. I suspect Karai and her men have one, perhaps both of them. I tried to go back to the rooftop after the smoke cleared so I could track them, but the cops arrived and I couldn't risk being seen."

While Viz was talking Alpha never took his gaze from Leo, his expression unchanged, the mad gleam in his eyes unmistakable. When Viz paused, Alpha merely shoved the gray wolf out of his way and dropped down on Leo's prone form, his lips pulled back over bloody teeth. "You will pay," he whispered harshly. "You will pay for everything!"

This time Leo didn't even see the blow coming, but he certainly felt it as Alpha's claws plunged into the soft skin at his side, between carapace and shell, stabbing deeply before ripping outward in a shower of hot blood.

Leo screamed again, pain washing through him like a tidal wave, the sharp scent of blood filling his nostrils. A wave of heat enveloped his body, bringing with it a twisting sensation deep in his belly. His vision blurred, causing Alpha's face to distort and twist above him, and he found himself strangely glad he wouldn't have to look into the wolf's mad eyes when he died.

He waited numbly for the next blow that would undoubtedly end him, but instead the weight suddenly left his chest, a low snarl of anger sounding from somewhere above him. He blinked his eyes, trying to clear his vision and figure out what was happening, but he found it hard to concentrate past the nauseating pain. He drifted in a gray haze somewhere between consciousness and unconsciousness, dimly aware of voices sounding angrily from above him, but unable to focus enough to understand what they were saying.

"…listen to what I'm saying!"

That was Viz, Leo noted distantly, trying to force his brain into some semblance of functioning order when all he really wanted to do was surrender to the darkness. But his will to survive was simply too great, and with a monumental effort he managed to turn his head in the direction of the voice, surprised at how difficult that simple action proved to be. He was able to make out Viz's large form off to his right, the wolf's back to him as he stood once more between Leo and an enraged Alpha.

"It doesn't matter," Alpha was snarling. "None of it matters. We will make them pay. All of them! We will rule this city and everyone here will fear and worship us!"

Leo blinked his eyes a couple of times, trying to focus, every breath coming in slow, pain filled gasps. He could feel the hot flow of blood from his side, soaking down into the gravel beneath him. He knew he needed to try and stop the bleeding if he were to have any chance of surviving, but with his arms pinned there wasn't much he could do but lie there and listen to the heated argument going on above him.

"You're speaking madness," Viz snapped. "We've lost half our pack. It's you and me now, and yet you talk about conquering the world as though you are some sort of god!"

"We ARE gods!" Alpha shouted, bloody spittle flying from his jaws, his eyes glittering wildly. "We have been made powerful, and I WILL use that power. Nothing will stand in my way. NOTHING!"

Viz didn't answer immediately, and from where Leo lay he could see the gray wolf's shoulders slump slightly in weary resignation. "You truly _have_ gone mad." Viz finally whispered, his voice laden with heavy sorrow. "I saw it happening in the cages in Stockman's lab, but I had hoped…" he trailed off, head shaking slowly from side to side.

Alpha let out a loud snort. "You do not know what you are talking about my old friend. I have merely woken up to the possibilities that have been presented us. The time of being downtrodden and misused is over. I will _never _go back to that life. Never! Now _I _make the rules. I will show all those who thought me beneath them just how powerful I am! If that is madness then I welcome it gladly, and so too should you!"

"And where will it end?" Viz asked quietly. "How many will have to die before you have adequately fed your thirst for power and vengeance?"

Alpha cocked his head to one side, a cold sneer pulling up one corner of his lips. "Does it matter?" He replied simply.

Viz stiffened, and though Leo couldn't see his friend's face he could clearly hear the sadness and regret in his voice. "It matters to me." Viz stated softly. "I have followed you faithfully for many years, Alpha, but I cannot follow you in this. I'm begging you, as a friend and fellow soldier, please do not do this. Come with me. We can leave the city together and find a new life somewhere else. Give up this mad plan. It will only bring about needless death, including your own!"

Alpha didn't reply immediately, but from where he lay Leo could see the brown wolf's face twist through a combination of emotions…pain, doubt, fear…before finally settling into a mask of anger. "Have it your way," he finally spat. "If you don't have the courage to do what needs done, then go. Run away and hide! But you will not stop me! I will have my revenge, and the turtle will be the first! Now get out of my way!"

Leo drew in a deep breath and tried to prepare for whatever was coming next, but to his surprise Viz didn't move except to square his stance and draw himself up to his full and impressive height. "No," he stated evenly. "Leave him, Alpha. You have done enough."

In a blink of an eye Alpha's expression morphed from angry to absolute furious, his entire body bristling with the force of his rage. "You DARE stand in my way?" he screamed, his clawed hands curling into bloody fists at his side, his eyes gleaming with that same mad light. "You DARE betray me for HIM!?"

Viz tried to reply, but Alpha didn't give him the chance. With a guttural howl the tawny wolf threw himself forward at Viz, claws slashing and jaws snapping. Their two bodies collided right next to Leo, the force of impact great enough that he could feel it through the roof beneath him. He was unable to keep from flinching, even that slight movement sending waves of new pain through his pinned and battered body. For a horrible moment he was afraid both wolves would topple over right on top of him, but somehow Viz managed to wrap an arm around Alpha's waist and fling him to one side.

"Alpha, stop!" Viz cried, but the maddened wolf was beyond listening. He came in again, and Viz had no choice but to meet him. The two collided together once more, tumbling away from Leo and across the rooftop, the air rent with the harsh sounds of their snarls and growls.

Leo could only lie there helplessly and watch, blood slowly fanning out around him in an ever growing pool. He could feel his body beginning to shut down, a heavy numbness sweeping over him, muting the pain and bringing with it an overwhelming desire to simply close his eyes and drift away. He fought the urge for as long as he could, but he was simply too weak, his body too exhausted, and he found his eyes closing of their own accord.

Distantly he thought he heard someone call his name, the voice desperate and afraid, but he couldn't muster the strength to try and respond. With a soft sigh, he gave up his battle and surrendered to the darkness, conscious thought fading until he knew no more.

TBC

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_Thanks!_


	26. Chapter 26

_Hey everyone! Once again I find myself apologizing for the long delay in updating. I found myself in the hospital again this month, nothing as series, but still frustrating. But I refuse to let it get to me! I want you all to know just how amazing you are and how much of an encouragement you are to me. Every new review, follow, and favorite is a bright spot in my day, so thank you so much!_

_This chapter was a bit of a challenge for multiple reasons, but I hope it turned out satisfactorily. Let me know your thoughts. :)_

* * *

Splinter was not a rat given to pacing.

His preferred method of handling worry and stress was through stillness and mediation, a practice that had become more habit than anything else from the time he was young. But after his evening's excursion into the Spirit Realm with Leonardo, he had to admit that for the first time he could remember he had no desire to meditate. Unfortunately he was also too worried to even _think _about going to bed, and so he did something he had not done in a very long time.

He paced.

He wandered the lair like a lost child, flittering around the kitchen, peaking into the lab, circling the couch and heading down the short hallway to the dojo. His movements were without purpose or meaning, merely a way to release the restless energy that he felt building up inside. He'd always possessed a sixth sense when it came to his children being in danger, and right now he felt fear wrap itself around his thin shoulders like a heavy chain.

It was in moments like these that he found himself inwardly cursing the age and frailty that kept him confined to the lair. He would have much preferred to be above, fighting by his sons' side. It would have had to have been easier than all this waiting.

At least he didn't have to wait alone. A half hour after Leo's departure April arrived at the lair, looking stressed and out of sorts. Her arrival was a welcome distraction, giving him something to focus on as he worked to help soothe the woman's frazzled nerves. He made some more tea, and together they sat at the dining room table, sipping the warm brew and making quiet conversation to fill the void of time. Splinter didn't miss the way April's eyes strayed to the clock on the wall every few minutes, or the way she seemed to wilt in her chair more and more as the hours slowly passed. He knew that she was every bit as worried as he was, and in a strange way that knowledge helped to calm his own mind. He could remember his Master telling him once that the key in battle was to focus on your enemies' fear, thus causing you to forget your own. He and April were not battling, but the concept was still the same.

It was some time after five in the morning when the slow grind of the front door opening had them both leaping to their feet. Splinter proved that he still had at least some speed and agility left in his old bones by beating April to the living room by several steps. They arrived just in time to see a clearly exhausted Donatello haul a nearly unconscious Michelangelo into the lair. Both boys looked like they had been through hell, and for a moment Splinter had a painful flashback to another night over six months ago when three of his sons had returned battered and broken without the fourth. Now only two stood in the doorway, and the sudden fear that gripped Splinter's heart was unlike any he had experienced before.

"Guys!" April cried, racing forward with Splinter to meet them on the front landing. "Are you okay?"

"We've been better," Donatello replied wearily, his voice strained but lacking the broken grief that would have told Splinter the worst had happened. "Do you mind helping me get Mikey to the lab?"

"Of course, my son," Splinter replied, quickly stepping up to help take some of Michelangelo's weight, noting with some worry the dried blood caking his youngest and the sodden bandage pressed against the crook of his neck. Mikey lifted his head slightly as Splinter took his arm, giving him an exhausted smile.

"S'good to be home," he muttered, his voice slightly slurred.

Splinter tightened his hold on his son, forcing a smile past the block of worry taking up residence in his chest. "As always, it is good to have you home, my son."

"Donnie, where are the others?" April asked breathlessly, hovering beside them as they made their slow way toward the med lab.

Donatello grunted, a myriad of emotions flashing across his face as he answered tiredly, "Casey's about a mile back in the tunnels. He's caught in a drainage shaft and we'll need some rope to get him out, but other than that I think he's okay." He paused, swallowing hard before adding in a strained voice, "Leo and Raph are still up top."

Splinter noted the tightness in his genius son's voice, a combination of pain and worry that he would recognize anywhere. He observed Donatello from across Mikey's semi-limp form, noting the blood soaked bandage high on his left arm, and the way he held that same arm tucked protectively against his chest.

He drew in a deep breath and reminded himself that it wasn't the first time his sons had come home from a dangerous mission bloody and beaten. He hated it each and every time, but had only himself to blame. He was the one who had trained them in Ninjitsu. He was the one who had instilled in them a sense of courage and honor that refused to let them sit by while innocents were hurt. They paid a heavy price for their bravery, but Splinter had never been more proud of anybody than the four he called his sons.

It was obvious April had more questions she wished to ask, but she refrained while they moved into the med lab. Donnie let out a soft hiss as he moved Mikey's arm from around his shoulders and lowered him gently down onto the bed in the center of the room. Mikey made no sound, but his already pale features lightened several more shades, and Splinter knew his youngest was barely clinging to consciousness.

"He needs blood," Donnie stated succinctly, turning toward the stainless steel mini fridge in the corner of the lab. Splinter stepped smoothly into his path, stopping him with a hand to his plastron.

"First let me see to your shoulder," he stated softly. "I am guessing that it is dislocated, yes? I imagine you will be able to help your brother much more effectively once it has been put right."

Donatello blinked down at him in surprise, and Splinter refrained from reminding his son that dislocations were one of the more common injuries the boys brought home from their various adventures. He had learned to recognize them early on, and had assisted Donatello enough times he felt confident he could see to the injury now.

"Of course, Sensei," Donnie mumbled. "You're right. I'll have a lot of stitching to do, especially when Raph gets home… It'll be easier if I can use both hands."

Splinter arched an eyebrow at his son's comment, but didn't say anything. He supposed it stood to reason that if Donatello and Michelangelo looked like this, his other two sons would probably come home looking similar. He winced at the thought, but chose not to dwell on it, focusing instead on the two sons already home.

"Donatello, do you mind telling me why Leonardo and Raphael stayed up top?" he asked gently, partly out of the need to know and partly as a way to distract his son as he moved to his side and began to inspect the damaged limb.

"And how Casey got stuck down a drainage shaft?" April added, watching them from her position by Mikey, one hand resting lightly on the youngest turtle's arm.

"It's a bit of a long story," Donnie grunted, watching Splinter carefully as he considered where to place his hands. He was having some difficulty due to the blood, both old and fresh, that coated Donatello's arm. It looked like their resident medic would be on the receiving end of some of those stitches he was talking about, and from the looks of it, some of the contents of the stainless steel fridge as well.

"Give us the abridged version," Splinter replied, finally finding a good hold on his son's arm that wasn't made slick by blood.

"The abridged version?" Donatello repeated slowly, his tone doubtful, the same voice he adopted when asked to explain one of his more complicated projects all the while knowing there was no way his listeners would be able to understand.

"Just do your best," Splinter murmured gently, placing his other hand high on his son's shoulder and preparing to move the joint back in place.

Donatello let out a small sigh, the sound filled with a bone deep weariness, but he obediently began talking.

"We spent the first half of the night wandering the streets and trying to take out as many gang members as possible. I've never seen so many gathered in one place before. It was mad..." He trailed off momentarily, his gaze focused inward before giving a small shake of his head and continuing on. "We were taking a break up on a rooftop when the wolves found us. The whole pack. They just appeared out of nowhere. We were preparing to fight them when Karai and her cronies showed up as well."

"You fought both the wolves _and_ Karai?" April gasped, her voice dismayed.

Splinter shared her alarm. No wonder Donatello and Michelangelo had shown up looking the way they did. His sons were skilled ninja, but against foes that many and that strong…

He felt his concern for his two missing sons double.

"Actually the wolves fought Karai more than we did," Donatello answered succinctly. "Things got a bit crazy and we all got separated. Alpha got a hold of Mikey, but Leo managed to get him free. But then Alpha took off after Leo and I couldn't follow them because I had to take care of Mikey. Casey and Raph arrived and Raph went to find Leo while the rest of us headed home. But Two Toes must have seen us and followed. He ambushed us in the tunnels and tossed Casey down the drainage shaft. Mikey and I fought him and managed to defeat him, but we couldn't get Casey out without rope, so we came home. That's pretty much it in a nutshell."

As Donnie finished his story Splinter smoothly and expertly reset his shoulder, eliciting a small grunt of pain from the battle weary turtle. A moment later though his expression relaxed and he let out a relieved sigh, gently rotating his shoulder. "Arigatou gozaimasu," he murmured softly, giving Splinter a small bow which the aged rat solemnly returned with one of his own.

"But you said Casey's okay?" April muttered, her brow furrowed as she struggled to process everything Donatello had just said. "He's just stuck, right?"

Donnie nodded, moving past Splinter so he could begin gathering together the supplies he would need to care for his brother. "Yeah," he replied evenly. "He may have hurt his shoulder again, but he didn't seem to be in any distress when we left him."

"That's good," April muttered, though Splinter could see the concern lingering in the girl's eyes. Concern for Leonardo and Raphael, who were still unaccounted for.

"It's alright April," Mikey stated weakly, speaking up for the first time since reaching the lab. "I'm sure they'll all be just fine. We just gotta keep hope, right?"

April looked down at the bloody turtle, offering him a weak smile as she reached out and gripped his hand tightly in her own. "Of course, Mikey," she whispered softly.

Mikey returned her smile with a small one of his own before letting his eyes drift wearily shut.

"Stay awake, Mikey," Donnie ordered from across the room, his back turned to them as he pulled down his suture kit from one of the cabinets. "You can sleep in a while, I promise."

Mikey's face twisted in a tired grimace, but he obediently re-opened his eyes.

Splinter suppressed a sigh, pushing his own fear somewhere deep inside where it couldn't distract him. "Donatello," he stated calmly. "Stay here and care for Michelangelo. Miss O'Neil and I will go and free Mr. Jones from the shaft."

Donnie paused in the process of retrieving a bag of blood from the fridge, glancing back at Splinter in surprise. "Are you sure?" he asked doubtfully. "I can go and do it just as soon as I get Mikey stabilized."

Splinter shook his head, glad that in this at least he would be able to help. Donatello looked beyond exhausted, and Splinter suspected his genius son still had much to do before he could rest. Splinter would lighten his burden in whatever way he could.

"Your skills are better served here, my son. Take care of Michelangelo and then prepare for your brothers' return. We will be back to help you as soon as possible."

Donnie hesitated for only a moment longer before nodding, his eyes reflecting both worry and relief.

"Hai, Sensei."

* * *

Raph was following a trail of blood.

He had picked up on it shortly after leaving Donnie and the others back in the alleyway. He sincerely hoped the blood trail wasn't Leo's. Donnie hadn't said anything about their brother being injured, but then again he _had_ been preoccupied with Mikey and may have forgotten to mention it. Whatever the case, Raph felt a pulsing sense of urgency lending speed to his every step despite his weariness.

On impulse he paused briefly to grab a handful of dishtowels hung out to dry on an alleyway line, shoving them through his belt and murmuring a silent apology for the theft. He knew Splinter and Leo would not approve, but he wanted to be prepared just in case it _was_ his brother leaking all over New York's streets.

Dawn was beginning to lighten the horizon when the blood trail led him back up to the rooftops, and he breathed out a silent sigh of relief. He was leaving the embattled streets of the Bronx behind him and moving into a quieter section of the city filled with more shops and warehouses. It would still be a few hours before this area fully awoke and became thronged with people. By that time he hoped to have found his brother and be far away in the safety of the sewers.

He paused on the roof of a two story thrift store, leaning down to inspect the blood trail a little better. He was pleased to see the blood was still wet and fresh, a good indication he was gaining on his quarry. He searched the nearby rooftops for any sign of movement, but it was still too dark, the shadows too deep to see very clearly.

A distant howl suddenly pierced the otherwise quiet morning, and Raph was instantly moving again, leaping from rooftop to rooftop in the direction of the sound, forgetting about the blood trail and letting his ears guide him.

He was close now, and the urge to hurry warred with a newly ingrained sense of caution. With Leo's life on the line he didn't want to risk screwing something up just because he wasn't being careful enough. He'd made that mistake once and nearly lost Mikey for it. He wasn't going to do it again.

He slowed his steps slightly, listening intently, and was rewarded for his patience when he heard a cry echo through the night, still distant, but definitely closer. He adjusted his direction slightly and took off once more, keeping his gaze peeled for any sign of movement. Another scream a few seconds later, and he forgot all about caution and charged into a headlong run. Now that he was closer he recognized the voice behind those screams, and it caused his blood to run cold.

Leo was in trouble.

Suddenly the sound of angry snarls and growls filled the morning air, causing him to slow his steps once more, his heart pounding wildly inside his chest. The sound reminded him of a vicious fight he had witnessed between two stray dogs one night while out on patrol. Mikey—ever the bleeding heart when it came to animals—had tried to break the fight up, only to suffer a couple of nasty bites for his trouble, and Donnie had lectured them all on the dangers of interfering with wild animals.

Raph moved silently to the edge of his current rooftop and peered ahead and slightly below to the top of the next building over. His eyes were instantly drawn to the two massive shapes rolling and tumbling about the roof in a blur of fur, claws, and snapping jaws. The sheer intensity of the battle robbed him of his breath, and he could only watch in silent awe, wondering what exactly had set the two wolves against each other.

With a small shake of his head he tore his gaze away from the fiercely battling due to sweep the rooftop, searching for some sign of Leo, hoping he had been wrong about the earlier screams he had heard…hoping it _hadn't_ been his brother after all. But then his gaze fell on Leo's sprawled form on the far side of the rooftop, and that hope died instantly within him. Even from a distance he could clearly make out the twin swords piercing his brother's body and holding him pinned to the roof, and for a moment he found himself frozen by a wave of pure panic.

'_Not again. I can't lose him again!'_

The thought fluttered through his brain like a bird with a broken wing, and then he was flinging himself forward, leaping the gap between the two buildings without a running start, adrenaline providing his body the energy it needed. He swept past the two battling wolves as though they weren't even there, falling to his knees beside his brother, Leo's name tearing from his throat in a desperate cry.

Leo didn't so much as twitch at Raph's frantic call, his eyes firmly closed, his features pale. There was blood everywhere, covering the ground like some grotesque red blanket, and for a horrible moment Raph thought for sure Leo was dead. His heart forgot how to function even as a cry of pure animal grief rose up his throat. But before he could scream his rage and denial to the brightening sky above him, his numb brain took note of the steady rise and fall of his brother's plastron, and the scream was instantly transformed into a sob of raw relief.

Leo was still breathing! His brother was alive!

Shaking with the force of the emotions running through him, Raph quickly scanned Leo's still form, taking in the extent of his injuries in one sweeping glance. The most obvious were the two stab wounds through Leo's arms, and Raph couldn't help but wince at the sight of his brother's beloved swords pierced through his own flesh. Luckily the swords seemed to have cut cleanly, and there wasn't that much blood showing as of yet. Whoever had done this to Leo hadn't been trying to kill his brother, just torture him, and the rage that flowed through Raph at that realization could have melted steal. He swallowed it down though, knowing that now was not the time to lose control.

As gruesome as the stab wounds were, they paled in comparison to the injury to Leo's side. The gap between carapace and plastron was a mess of torn flesh and bright crimson, the sight enough to cause Raph's heart to flutter in fear even as his stomach twisted nauseatingly. He suddenly regretted sending Donnie away. Leo's injuries were way beyond his knowledge in basic first aid, and Raph found himself desperately wishing for his genius brother's steady hands and calm presence. But Donnie was gone…hopefully home by now…and Raph was on his own.

He couldn't help but think of the last time Leo's life had rested in his hands, and his complete lack of ability to do _anything _to save him. He shuddered at the memory before forcefully pushing it away.

This time would be different. He would not fail his brother again!

Taking a deep breath to help steady his nerves, he yanked the stolen dishtowels from his belt, whispering a silent thank you to the heavens above that he'd thought to grab them. Copying what he'd seen Donnie do back in the alleyway he balled all but two of them up and pressed the whole mass to the horrific wound in Leo's side, jerking slightly in surprise when his brother let out a low moan of pain at the contact.

"Leo?" he called, watching his brother's face intently even as he continued to apply pressure to the towels. "Can you hear me bro?"

He thought he might have seen his brother's eyelids flicker slightly, but it could have just been wishful thinking. In any case, Leo gave no further signs of waking, and Raph forced himself to turn his attention back to the task at hand, Donnie's voice echoing in the back of his mind.

_Manage blood loss. Stabilize patient. Get the shell home._

"Hold on, Leo," he whispered, adjusting his brother's belt to help hold the wad of towels in place before shifting his gaze to the swords pinning Leo's arms. The sickness in his stomach returned full force at the thought of what he would have to do to free his brother, but he couldn't afford to hesitate now. He had no way to know just how deep the puncture wounds in Leo's side went, or how much internal damage they might have caused, but he feared the worst. He needed to get Leo home as soon as possible. Donnie would know what to do from there.

He was about to push to his feet to better position himself to remove the blades when behind him there was a sharp yelp of pain, followed by a sudden heavy silence, the growls and snarls he'd been doing his best to ignore cutting off as abruptly as though someone had pressed a mute button. The resulting quite was ominous, and Raph twisted around to face behind him, his already racing heart picking up speed inside his chest.

Fifteen yards away Alpha stood panting heavily, brown fur matted with blood, Viz a gray and unmoving heap at his feet. Alpha stared down at the other wolf for several long seconds, his entire body shaking, the silhouette of his form against the rising sun making Raph think of some hideous gargoyle come to life. Then the wolf slowly turned his head to stare in Raph's direction, and the red banded turtle felt a wave of cold dread wash over him.

There was something wild and feral in Alpha's dark eyes, all humanity drowned out by an animalistic savagery. Raph couldn't hold back a small shiver, every instinct in his body screaming out a warning, urging him to flee. In another situation he might have even listened to those instincts, pride be damned, but not this time. There could have been ten wolves, and still Raph would have held his ground. He wasn't abandoning Leo again.

_Never_ again!

Alpha's lips pulled back in a low snarl, and Raph could sense the hatred emanating from him like heat from a hot stove. The wolf stared at him for the space of a few heartbeats before letting out a spine tingling howl and charging forward, straight toward them.

Raph's heart skipped a beat, his hands automatically dropping to the Sais tucked in his belt, already knowing the defensive weapons would not be enough to hold the maddened wolf at bay. He desperately cast around for some other option and his gaze fell on a thick metal pole lying by Leo's feet. Without time to think or plan, he lunged for the pole, lifting its heavy weight and swinging it around with all the strength he could muster just as Alpha closed the final gap between them with a mighty leap.

Time seemed to slow as Alpha sailed through the air straight at them, clawed hands extended, face twisted in a rictus snarl. Raph tumbled backwards over Leo's legs, the pole extended out before him, a cry of pure fear and adrenaline tearing from his lungs.

He saw the moment when Alpha's eyes widened, the wolf seeing the pole lifted toward him but already in the air and unable to dodge it. A second later he slammed into the twisted and mutilated end of the improvised weapon, the force of impact driving Raph straight back on his shell, all the air leaving his lungs as the other end of the pole jammed against his plastron with bruising force.

A guttural sound tore from Alpha's throat, and Raph couldn't help but turn his head aside and close his eyes, half expecting the wolf's tearing claws to rip into him at any second. But no strikes landed, and a second later the pole was ripped from his hands. He forced his eyes back open, pushing himself up on to his elbows as he searched out the threat.

Except there was no threat. Not anymore.

Alpha stood several paces away, the metal pole neatly impaling him through the stomach, just beneath the rib cage. He was panting, his tongue lulling from between slightly parted jaws, blood dripping in a steady flow from his mouth. He was staring at Raph in a mixture of surprise and confusion, his ears twitching forward and then backwards. Gone was the hatred and rage. Gone was the animalistic violence. The wild gleam in his eyes was now replaced with something dull and flat.

At that moment Raph saw the human behind the wolf form clearly for the first time…the bitter and forgotten soldier who had been transformed not by Stockman's science alone, but also by the anger festering in his heart.

Alpha's jaw moved, as though he were trying to speak, but no sound came out. He took a single stumbling step forward, one clawed hand half lifting from his side. Raph tensed, prepared to leap to his feet, but before he could move the wolf was down, his legs folding beneath him, his massive frame tumbling to the side to hit the ground with a small woof of air.

Silence descended across the rooftop, the only sound the wild pounding of Raph's heart echoing through his ears. He couldn't seem to tear his gaze off of Alpha's fallen form, not quite able to comprehend that the fight was over before it had even really begun. After everything that had happened he was having a hard time believing it had been that easy. No, not easy, he amended mentally, rubbing at the spot on his chest where he was sure a massive bruise was forming beneath his plastron. Not easy…just quick.

Ignoring the weakness that made standing somewhat difficult, Raph pushed himself to his feet, pulling in a couple shuddering breaths to help steady himself. He stared down at Alpha's still body, wondering how it was that the wolf didn't look nearly as massive in death as he had in life.

With a small shake of his head he purposefully turned his back on Alpha's body and returned his focus to his injured brother. He moved to stand over the sword piercing Leo's left bicep, reaching out to grip the hilt with hands that were visibly trembling.

'_Get a grip, Raph,'_ he told himself firmly. _'Leo needs you.'_

He knew the risk in removing the weapon—could clearly hear Donnie's voice lecturing on the dangers of severed arteries—but he couldn't see how he had much of a choice. His brother was already bleeding to death, and Raph had to do something. He had to get Leo home where he could get the help he so desperately needed. There was no more time to wait.

Swallowing hard, he tightened his grip around the sword's hilt and pulled upward. He was surprised when the blade resisted, its tip buried deep enough in the roof that it didn't immediately want to come free. He reset his stance, grit his teeth, and pulled once more, and after a moment or two of resistance the blade finally slid free. Leo let out another loud groan, his head tossing restlessly, and Raph winced, torn between wishing his brother would wake and hoping he would stay unconscious, at least for a little while. At least until he could remove the second sword.

Carefully not looking at the blood staining the bright steel, Raph lay the sword on the ground and bent to inspect the wound left behind by the blade. He was relieved to see that it wasn't bleeding as much as he feared it might. He didn't have the knowledge or experience to be able to guess how much muscle or nerve damage there was, but at least it looked as though the sword had missed hitting any major arteries. He quickly grabbed up one of the remaining towels and used it to tightly bind the wound, earning another soft groan from his brother.

"Sorry bro," Raph murmured softly, "but I can't have you losing any more blood on me. "

Leo's brow curled slightly in a pained frown, but he didn't open his eyes, and Raph didn't waste any more time before rising and moving to his brother's other side, prepared to remove the second sword. He knew at a single glance that this one would be much more difficult, buried as it was to almost half its length through his brother's forearm and into the roof below. Still, he didn't hesitate to grab the hilt and heave upward, grunting in frustration when all his effort afforded him was another pained groan from his wounded brother.

He frowned down at the sword, frustrated, the pain and exhaustion he had been holding at bay all night settling around his shoulders like a heavy blanket. Why was this so hard!? His brother lay bleeding to death beneath him, and Raph couldn't get it together enough to pull a stupid sword out of the ground!

"Let me."

The soft voice sounding behind Raph nearly had him jumping out of his shell. He spun around, his hands reaching for his Sais, only to have his vision blur under a sudden wave of dizziness. He automatically widened his stance to compensate his loss of balance, blinking his eyes rapidly to try and clear his vision. It was a moment or two before his body decided to cooperate…_what the hell was wrong with him?_…and he was able to focus in on the massive wolf standing only a few feet in front of him.

"Stay back," he ground out, sinking down into a fighting stance, his breath speeding up slightly as he prepared to defend his brother yet again.

Viz let out a soft sigh, making no move to close the distance between them, his clawed hands hanging loosely and unthreateningly at his sides. "I do not wish to fight," he stated simply. "I am here to help, if you will allow me."

Raph was taken aback by the soft declaration, but he didn't relax his tense stance, staring at the wolf with undisguised suspicion. Viz looked battered and bloody, but his dark gaze was clear as he returned Raph's stare with a calm one of his own, waiting patiently for the turtle's response.

"You want to help?" Raph snapped, his grip tightening on the hilts of his Sais. "Then get the hell out of here!"

Viz gave his head a small shake. "I will not harm either you or him," he stated solemnly. "I give you my word."

Raph let out a rough snort. "You were perfectly willing to hurt us a few hours ago," he pointed out harshly. "Why should I trust you now?"

Viz released another sigh, his shoulders visibly drooping. "It is true," he agreed grimly. "I was blinded by misguided loyalty, but my eyes have been opened now. I will be the first to admit I was wrong. Please, he is my friend, and I would like to help. I would like to make amends for what I have done."

Raph opened his mouth to tell the wolf exactly where he could shove his '_amends'_, but a gentle brush of fingers across his ankle distracted him before he could speak. He glanced down in surprise, startled to see Leo gazing up at him, eyes hooded and shadowed with pain.

"Raph…"

His name was released on a whisper thin sigh, and Raph found his heart pounding faster with an odd combination of worry and hope. He was beyond relieved that Leo was awake, but didn't like how weak his brother sounded, nor the unnatural pallor to his skin.

"It's okay Leo. I'm going to get you home. Just hold on."

"Let me help," Viz repeated, taking another small step forward, stopping only when Raph raised one of his Sais threateningly.

"Don't, Raph," Leo whispered, his voice frighteningly weak, but still carrying an undeniable weight of authority. "It's okay…let him help."

Raph frowned, his jaw clenched stubbornly. He remembered what Leo had said earlier about considering Viz a friend, but surely now, after all they had been through this night, Leo had to realize the wolves were nothing but bad news? The gray wolf had been perfectly willing to fight them earlier, before Karai had appeared. He had kidnapped Mikey, for shell's sake! How could Leo still trust him?!

"Please Raph," Leo pleaded. "He…he saved me….from Alpha…" he trailed off, eyes closing as though trying to speak that much was simply too much effort. He tried to lift his free arm, but didn't get far before grimacing in pain and dropping the injured limb back to his side with a small groan.

Raph felt his resolve shattering, and before he even knew what he was doing he had fallen to his knees beside his brother, dropping one Sai so he could reach out and grab the hand Leo had just attempted to lift to him. "Easy, Leo," he grunted. "Don't try to move right now."

Leo gave a weak nod, his eyes still shut, his breaths coming in ragged gasps that set Raph's teeth on edge.

Raph looked up at Viz, fighting against his doubt and mistrust. He reminded himself that if the gray wolf had meant them harm he had certainly had ample opportunity to attack before now. If he had, Raph doubted he would have had the strength to stop him. With Alpha he had gotten lucky. He doubted he would have the same luck twice.

Leo had said Viz had saved him, which would explain why the gray wolf had been fighting _against_ Alpha when he arrived. Viz had been protecting his brother, and if that didn't earn him some trust, Raph wasn't sure what would. Then there was the indisputable fact that accepting Viz's help was the fastest way to get Leo free and home where he could get the care he needed.

Which meant Raph was out of excuses. Already his hesitation had cost precious minutes he wasn't sure his brother could afford. Taking a deep breath, he gave Viz a slight nod, indicating without words that he was willing to let the wolf help them.

Viz didn't hesitate but limped forward a few steps and reached for the hilt of Leo's sword. "Be ready," he murmured softly. Leo gave a small nod, eyes still firmly closed, and a second later Viz jerked the blade free in one swift and powerful motion. Leo's cry was muted behind clenched teeth, but his hand tightened into a vice grip around Raph's.

"Easy," Raph soothed, even as he kept a wary eye on the wolf now standing over them with his brother's bloody sword. Viz caught his eye and a sad little smile crossed his features as he very slowly leaned down and placed Leo's sword on the ground beside its twin.

Leo shifted, reopening his eyes to gaze up at the wolf towering over them. He took in a single shuddering breath before whispering softly. "Thank you."

Viz grunted, shaking his head as he crouched down across from Raph. "There is no need to thank me, my friend," he replied, grabbing the final dishtowel and expertly wrapping it around the wound in Leo's forearm. "I am only sorry that I did not act sooner. Alpha was not the man I once knew. I saw the changes in him but turned a blind eye because I did not _want_ to see. My foolishness cost us both."

Raph watched as Viz's gaze flickered over to Alpha's body, pain and grief that Raph understood more than he cared to admit flashing across his features.

"I'm sorry," Leo breathed, his gaze also traveling to rest on the pack leader's still body, his eyes reflecting sadness and regret. "I'm sorry… it ended this way."

Viz bowed his head, breathing out a deep sigh that carried a world of weariness. "As am I," he whispered. "I will choose to remember him as the man he once was…as the _friend_ he once was, and not as the animal he became."

Raph shifted, suddenly incredibly uncomfortable. It seemed like he was the only one who _didn't_ regret Alpha's death. He had killed the wolf, but he had done it in defense of his brother's life as well as his own. Knowing what Alpha had done to Leo, he couldn't even bring himself to feel bad about it. It made him feel awkward and out of place, understanding the others grief but unable to really relate. In that moment he wanted nothing more than to scoop Leo up in his arms and race for home, forgetting the wolves ever existed.

As if sensing his thoughts Viz looked up and caught his eye. Raph half expected to see at least a little accusation in the wolf's gaze, but Viz's expression was clear of any blame as he asked calmly, "Can you get him home?"

Raph nodded, choosing not to voice the fact that this would not be the first time he carried home an injured brother. He was hurting and tired, but if there was one thing he was good at, it was muscling his way through obstacles. And that was all this was now…another obstacle to get through.

He wouldn't let his brother down.

"What…about you?" Leo gasped out, staring at Viz with weary concern.

Viz shook his head, smiling down at the injured turtle with gentle fondness. "Don't worry about me," he replied easily. "I will take care of Alpha's body, and then I will find what is left of the pack. Without Alpha, perhaps I can convince them to leave the city. We have done enough damage here I think."

Leo frowned, his gaze flickering to Raph before returning to the wolf. "You could come with us," he offered softly, and Raph felt himself tense. Trusting the wolf to help free his brother was one thing, trusting him into their home was something else entirely. Maybe it was just his own damn pride in the way, but he didn't _want_ Viz to come with them. He didn't want the wolf's presence to change the family dynamics any more than it had already been changed by Leo's loss of memory.

'_Or maybe you just don't want the competition,' _a traitorous voice whispered in the back of his mind. The knowledge that Viz had been his brother's friend and confidant for the past six months while Raph had been missing Leo more than anything left him with a bitter taste of jealousy. But he couldn't deny the fact that Viz had saved his brother… more than once. Whether he liked him or not, he realized he owed the wolf a debt of gratitude that could never be repaid.

"We could probably work something out," he stated quietly, not really meeting Viz's eyes but hoping the wolf understood the hidden message behind the words. He had never been very good at saying thank you even under the best of circumstances.

Viz looked surprised by the offer, his expression softening into a genuine smile. "Thank you for the invitation, but I must decline," he replied easily. "I do not think I am suited for a life in the sewers. But seeing how you and your family have settled in and made a life for yourself here, despite your mutation, gives me hope. I will try and do the same. Somewhere out in the country perhaps."

Leo looked like he was about to argue, but a sudden shudder ripped through his body, causing him to gasp, his eyes sliding closed yet again as he fought against the pain, his grip on Raph's hand tightening to the point it cut off circulation. Raph didn't care. He gripped his brother back every bit as tightly, a fresh wave of worry sweeping through him. With Leo awake and talking it had been easy to forget just how badly injured he was.

"Take him home," Viz urged softly, rising to his feet in one fluid move. "With luck, we will meet again soon."

Raph looked up at the wolf before giving a firm nod, not needing to be told twice.

TBC

_After all the cliffhangers lately I found it difficult to find a good way to end this chapter. Oh well, here it is...Hope you enjoyed. Would love to hear your thoughts. Pretty please with a gumdrop on top?_


	27. Chapter 27

_Hey All! Thanks again to all you who followed, favorited, and most of all reviewed. Your comments, great and small, were appreciated tremendously!_

* * *

Leonardo hovered on the edge of consciousness, waging a determined battle against the pain and fatigue that fought to drag him into darkness. It would be so easy to give in, to surrender to the promise of no more pain…and yet still he fought, fearful that if he went under he would never surface again, like a stone thrown into a deep pool. With every breath he could feel his body weakening, but he refused to give up without a fight.

Desperate, he sought to latch on to something, anything, to keep him anchored to the waking world. Grinding his teeth against the tearing agony encasing his body, he cast his senses out in hopes of offering his mind some sort of distraction to focus on. He didn't have the strength to open his eyes, so sight was out, and the only taste in his mouth was that of his own blood, but sound, smell, and sensation were still available. Unfortunately they didn't have much to offer. The only sounds he could hear were the trickle of water and the labored pants of his brother as he carried him home. The smells were the familiar musty tang of the sewers, with the underlying metallic scent of blood…a lot of blood. As for sensation…this was the one sense Leo wished he could turn off entirely. Every step his brother took sent tendrils of fire throughout his body, the pain building and building until…

"Aaagh," The loud groan tore itself free from Leo's throat without his permission, his body demanding some outlet for the throbbing agony. He just wanted it all to stop, and for the first time since this nightmarish trip had begun he considered letting go…drifting into the comforting oblivion where the pain and fear couldn't touch him.

"Leo?"

Raph's rough voice dragged him back from the edge of the precipice, reminding him again why he was fighting. The worry in his brother's tone was undeniable even in Leo's pain muddled state. He felt Raph's steps falter for a second before continuing their quick pace forward, his rough breaths sawing in and out of his chest in a way that would have made Leo frown in worry if he'd had the strength.

"Stay with me, bro," Raph panted, his voice seeming to come from somewhere far off. "We're almost home. Just a bit farther…"

_Home_

Leo latched on to that word, his mind forming a mental image of the lair and the bright lights and warmth that waited there. The longing the image ignited in him was enough to combat the encroaching darkness, at least for a little while. He mentally wandered the halls and rooms of the lair, reveling in the details, big and small, that his mind was able to produce. It seemed like forever since he'd been home, and in a way, he knew that wasn't far off. True, he had spent the last week and a half in the lair, but he hadn't _remembered_ anything.

It was a small detail that made a world of difference.

Thoughts of home invariably led to thoughts of his family. He hoped Donnie and Mikey had made it home okay. He didn't want to think too much about all the blood covering his youngest brother, or how exhausted Donnie had looked.

He wished he could see them again, could wrap them in his arms and tell them how much he had _missed_ them. His family was the world to him, and even now he found it hard to comprehend that he had actually forgotten them. It somehow didn't seem possible, and he couldn't help but recall the empty and hollow ache that had filled him from the moment he had first woken up in the warehouse under Viz's watchful eye. At the time he thought it had stemmed from losing _himself_, but in truth it was far more than that. It had come from losing _them._ Even then he had missed them, though he hadn't known at the time what it was he was missing.

He wanted to tell them he remembered them. He wanted to let them know that he was back…_Leo_ was back…and that every precious memory they had shared wasn't lost as they had all feared. Donnie knew, but Leo wanted to share the wonderful news with _all_ his family. He wanted to share the joy of being reunited again…this time fully and completely.

If only he could be certain he would make it home.

It was a morbid and sobering thought that he couldn't ignore. The death he had relived in the Spirit Realm only hours earlier was too fresh in his mind, as was his close call up on the rooftop. By some miracle he had survived so far, but he knew death would not be denied its prize forever. Even now he could feel it hovering in the darkness, waiting to claim him for its own, this time for good. The realization that he might not _get_ to see his family…to tell them the wonderful news…was somehow more painful than the searing agony of his wounds.

But there was one more brother he _could_ tell.

Mustering all the remaining energy in his failing body, Leo forced his eyes open, blinking in the dim light. His brother's profile floated in the air above him, eyes glinting with steely determination as he plowed his way forward. For a moment Leo merely studied the lines of Raph's face, not attempting to speak but merely drinking in the familiar features. Raph must have sensed his gaze because he glanced down, his eyes widening slightly when he found Leo staring up at him.

"Hey," Raph grunted, not slowing his pace as his gaze shifted back and forth between Leo and the tunnel in front of him. "You still with me?"

Leo mustered the strength for a weary nod, his cheek rubbing against his brother's shoulder. He swallowed hard, trying to relieve the dryness in his throat before attempting to speak. "I..I have something…to tell you," he finally managed to gasp out, dismayed at how weak his voice sounded.

Raph glanced down at him, a small frown forming a crease between his eyes. He looked anxious and afraid, but his voice was even as he said, "Save it. We can talk at home, after Donnie's patched you up. Right now you need to save your strength."

Leo shook his head, but didn't waste energy trying to contradict his brother. Instead he merely drew in a deep breath and stated softly, "I remember you."

In hindsight Leo realized that it might not have been the wisest to just blurt it out like that. Raph stumbled and nearly went down, catching himself against the tunnel wall at the last minute. The resulting jolt to Leo's injured body had him screwing his eyes shut and clamping his jaw down on a cry of pain. A wave of heat and dizziness washed over him, and he could feel the darkness rear up in the back of his mind, ready to claim him as its own. He grit his teeth and fought back against it, forcing his eyes back open and trying to steady his ragged breathing.

He found Raph staring down at him, his expression a strange mixture between shock, guilt, and worry. He was no longer moving, standing stock still in the middle of the tunnel, his gaze locked on Leo's. "What?" he whispered, his voice so low that Leo wouldn't have heard him if he wasn't so close.

Leo somehow mustered the strength to smile weakly up at his brother despite the pain ravaging his body. "I remember," he repeated softly, holding Raph's gaze and hoping his brother could read the truth in his eyes. "Everything."

Raph let out a small choked sound, continuing to stare down at Leo with wide eyes. He opened his mouth, then closed it again without saying anything, the raw hope in his expression easy to see. A few long seconds passed as he stared down at Leo, saying nothing, before he finally gave a small nod.

"Okay," he whispered, then looked back up and resumed his swift pace toward home.

Leo wasn't quite sure what to make of his brother's reaction. He had expected something…_more,_ he supposed. But before he could give it much more thought, Raph was speaking from above him, his gaze never leaving the tunnel path before him.

"When we were little, what was the nickname Master Splinter used to call us?"

Leo let his eyes slide closed, a small smile tugging up the corners of his mouth. "_Sukoshi kame_," he whispered on a sigh. "Little turtles."

Raph's arms tightened briefly around him, but Leo lacked the strength to open his eyes and look up at his brother. A second later Raph asked another question. "How old was Donnie when he rigged the lair so we could have electricity and heat?"

"Eleven," Leo whispered, the smile still on his face as he relished the memory.

Raph asked him another question, and then another, each one with a simple one to two word answer. It didn't take long for Leo to realize that his brother's questions weren't so much about proving that Leo really did remember, but more a creative way to keep him awake and talking. It was brilliant, and Leo found himself warmed by the memories each question brought forth, his waning strength somehow bolstered.

He was so caught up in the "game", it came as somewhat of a surprise when Raph suddenly stopped. His brother let out a soft grunt, and a second later the grinding sound of stone across stone suddenly echoed through the tunnels, and Leo felt a splash of bright light fall across his face.

He was home.

Leo forced his eyes open once more as Raph stepped into the lair. The familiar sights and smells of their home washed over him, and his eyes filled with unexpected tears. In that moment he realized just how much he had _not_ expected to make it home. Not conscious anyway. For the first time he let himself relax slightly, his body suddenly feeling so much heavier even as a sudden sense of peace enveloped him.

"Donnie!" Raph bellowed, causing Leo to jerk in surprise. He tensed, expecting the waves of pain to wash over him, but nothing happened. It was then that he realized his body had gone somewhat numb. He couldn't even really feel Raph's arms around him anymore. The discovery was both a relief and a bit concerning all in one.

There was a scuffle of sound from across the lair, and then Master Splinter suddenly appeared in the doorway leading to the lab, his dark eyes widening noticeably at the sight of them standing just inside the door. Splinter darted forward, and a second later Donnie appeared behind him, looked haggard and worn but wearing an expression of profound relief.

That relief faded slightly as he took them in, but then he was striding forward, darting around Splinter and up the stairs to stand before them. "Here Raph, let me take him," he murmured reaching out toward Leo.

Leo frowned slightly, finding the request strange. Raph had just carried him through miles of tunnels and now they were only a few steps from the med lab. Why would he bother transferring him to Donnie now? But to his surprise Raph didn't make any argument, and the next thing Leo knew he was being passed from one brother to the next. Once more he waited tensely for the waves of pain the movement should have ignited, but again he felt nothing more than some uncomfortable tingling. Definitely not a good sign.

"My son," Splinter's warm hand ghosted across Leo's forehead, and he tried to muster the strength to smile at his father. He wasn't sure if he succeeded.

"Sensei, you have Raph?" Donnie asked breathlessly, already turning and heading toward the med lab.

"I have him," Splinter answered calmly.

Leo was confused by the exchange, and as Donnie carried him away he forced his head to turn to glance behind them. He was shocked to see Splinter reaching out toward Raph who was down on one knee, one hand pressed to the ground in front of him as though to hold himself up. His head was bowed, and his body was literally painted red with blood. Leo knew some of that blood was his own…some, but not all.

A small gasp tore from his throat, and he inwardly cursed himself for not noticing before how badly injured Raph was. The fact that his brother had managed to carry him all the way home was nothing short of miraculous, and he found himself marveling at Raph's strength and determination even as fear and worry curled around his heart.

"Easy Leo, everything's going to be okay," Donnie soothed, hurrying him around the corner and into the lab. The lights were much brighter here, and Leo found his eyes slipping closed against the harsh glare.

"Leo!"

Mikey's cry of alarm and fear stabbed into Leo like a knife to the heart, and he tried to turn and look at his brother. But it seemed like his body was no longer under his control. He couldn't even get his eyes to open, let alone turn his head.

"Don't even _think_ of getting up off that bed, Mikey," Donnie snapped, even as Leo felt his body being lowered onto the cool metal of the examination table. "April, if you're finished with Casey's arm, I could use some help."

"Of course," April soft voice echoed from somewhere to Leo's left. A moment later he smelled the soft scent of her floral shampoo as she moved over to the bed, one hand lowering to rest on his shoulder, warm and soft. "Oh, Leo," she whispered, dismay evident in her voice.

Once again Leo fought to open his eyes, to let them know he was still with them, but he felt so incredibly weak, his eyelids as heavy as the 40lb weights Raph kept in his room. He tried to say something instead, but his tongue and lips were every bit as heavy as his eyelids. He realized with some dismay that the darkness he had been holding at bay was closing in, wrapping him in its black embrace. He wanted to continue to fight it, but his body was betraying him, surrendering to the darkness even as his mind continued to resist.

He heard talking above him, Donnie calling out instructions, the vague impression of hands touching his body, of voices calling out to him, but he could not respond. He was tired, so very tired, and he knew he couldn't fight any longer. Honestly, he couldn't really remember why he was fighting in the first place. He was home and surrounded by family, and at the moment that was all that mattered.

Releasing a soft sigh, he surrendered his last hold on consciousness and slipped into the waiting arms of darkness.

* * *

It was all a great big mess.

April stood in the doorway to the med lab, gripping the handle of the coffee mug she carried in one hand while the other braced against the doorjamb. Her eyes scanned the room before her, her mouth pulled down in a slight frown. She didn't think she had ever see Donnie's lab anything but clean and meticulously organized, but right now it was littered with bandages, wrappers, surgical tools, and discarded gear and weapons. The chaos was indication of the frantic activity that had encompassed the room only a short time earlier, and though it was quiet now, a sense of tension still hung in the air.

Taking a deep breath, April stepped fully into the room and walked over to the nearest bed, peering down at its sleeping occupant. Mikey's color was a lot better than when he had first come in, but the deep circles of exhaustion under his eyes remained. The whole side of his neck and shoulder were bathed in white bandages and a brace was wrapped tightly around one knee.

April was glad to see him sleeping. He had been nearly frantic when Leo had been brought in, and Casey had been forced to all but sit on him to keep him still so as to not tear out the delicate stitch work Donnie had just finished completing. The raw terror on his face was something that would haunt April for some time to come, and had been echoed inside her own heart. It wasn't until Donnie had slipped him some sort of sedative that the youngest turtle had been able to calm down.

April's gaze traveled across the room to the second bed, where she could make out Leo's outline in the dimmed lights of the lab. Her heart picked up pace in her chest as she remembered once more the desperate race to save him. He had been so weak, and though Raph claimed he had been awake when they reached the lair, he had lost consciousness by the time Donnie had brought him back to the lab.

He had lost so much blood. His skin had been so sallow as to appear almost white, and twice during the frantic scramble to patch his wounds he had stopped breathing. April didn't think she had ever seen anything quite as frightening as Donnie pounding on his brother's chest, his mouth pulled into a snarl as he _demanded_ Leo start breathing again. Donnie never swore. Ever. But he had then, viciously and with feeling, and everyone else in the room had been too shocked and terrified to say anything.

Somehow Leo had managed to pull through those first terrifying hours, and though he wasn't out of danger yet, the homemade equipment sitting by his head and monitoring his vitals showed he had at least stabilized. Now all they had to do, according to Donnie, was watch him for signs of infection or internal hemorrhaging. One they could do something about, the other…

The puncture wounds in Leo's side had been very deep, but after inspecting it closely Donnie had thought they had missed hitting anything vital. April prayed fervently that this was the case. Due to their hard armor plating, as well as the woeful lack of proper tools and equipment, performing an internal surgery was all but impossible. Donnie would try if it came to that, but April had serious doubts that Leo would be strong enough to survive such an operation.

Releasing a quiet sigh, she pushed away those dark thoughts and turned her attention to the other occupants of the room. Splinter sat in a chair next to Leo's bed, one hand resting on his oldest son's arm, his head bowed in either meditation or sleep. At the foot of the bed Raph sat in another chair, his head leaning back over the edge, his eyes closed as his plastron rose and fell evenly. While Donnie had finished off with Leo, April had stitched the most serious of Raph's cuts, her hands cramping from the sheer number of stitches. Now his arms and legs sported enough bandages that they appeared almost completely white, with only an occasional hint of green peeking through. Just like Mikey and Leo, an IV had been taped to the inside of his elbow, and an almost empty bag of blood hung from a metal pole standing next to the chair. April knew Raph had wanted to stay awake to guard his older brother, but just like Mikey, sheer exhaustion had eventually won out, pulling him into sleep.

A low thud and muffled grunt of frustration drew April's gaze to the far side of the lab. Aside from herself, the only other person awake was Donnie, and said turtle was apparently attempting to lift a box of bandages up onto a shelf. Unfortunately Donnie's left arm didn't appear to be cooperating very well, and the box had ended up on the floor, the bandages spilling out to add to the mess already there. Donnie stood staring down at the upended box, his expression one of exhausted frustration.

April moved over to her friend, reaching out and laying a soft hand on his shoulder. "Don't, Donnie," she murmured softly. "I'll take care of all this. Why don't you sit down?"

Donnie turned tired brown eyes in her direction and April prepared herself for the inevitable arguments. But instead Donnie surprised her by merely nodding before stumbling over to the nearby desk chair and slumping down into it with a deep sigh. April followed him, watching with worried eyes. Her gaze fell on the blood soaked bandage high on his arm, and she inwardly cursed as she realized in the crazy scramble to patch up all his brothers, Donnie had never had his own injury properly cared for.

"Here," she said, reaching out and placing the coffee mug on the desk by his right hand. "It's still pretty hot, so be careful."

Donnie gave her a grateful look, lifting the cup and breathing deeply of the steam wafting from the top. "Thanks April," he muttered.

April returned his smile with a small one of her own before moving over to his left side and reaching for the bandage on his arm. He made no move to stop her as she tugged at the knot a few times before giving up and using a nearby pair of scissors to cut the cloth. She gently peeled the bandaging aside, letting out a low hiss at the jagged wound she found bleeding sluggishly beneath.

"You're going to need stitches," she stated resignedly, ignoring the slight twitch in her hand as she thought about even more needle work. "It's a good thing you had a lot of needle and thread on hand, but after tonight I think you may have to restock. I'm pretty sure I used a whole spool on Raph alone." She didn't even want to _think _about how much Donnie had been forced to use on Leo.

Donnie winced, his eyes shadowed. "You're probably right," was all he murmured, sipping slowly from his coffee mug, his eyes distant.

April squeezed his forearm before turning and going in search of what remained of the suture kit. She found it on the table next to Leo's bed, its contents strewn out in an untidy mess around it. She quickly repacked the kit, then returned to Donnie, who looked like he hadn't so much as blinked since she left.

The lights in the room had been dimmed in consideration of its sleeping occupants, so April reached out and flipped on the small desk lamp beside her, angling the bulb so the light shown directly on the wound. Then she pulled on a pair of gloves, grabbed the iodine bottle, and set to work cleaning and stitching the jagged gash. Through it all Donnie sat silent and complacent, not so much as grunting as she stuck the needle through his flesh.

Fifteen minutes and twenty-five stitches later, April wearily re-wrapped the now sealed cut with fresh bandages, then stripped the bloody gloves from her hands and tossed them in the nearby wastebasket. She mentally resolved to teach Casey how to stitch at the earliest opportunity. Right now her boyfriend was passed out on the couch in the living room, but in the future it would help to have an extra set of hands to push a needle in case a situation like this arose again. She hoped desperately that it wouldn't, but knowing her turtle friends, there could be no guarantee of that.

Focusing back on Donnie, April noted just how ragged and tired he appeared. Of course, that seemed to be the popular look for the evening, but Donnie seemed like he had reached a state somewhere _beyond_ exhausted. She was glad she had made him sit down when she had, or she might have ended up peeling him from the floor again. The memory from six months ago was still fresh, and she had no desire to repeat it.

"Do you think you could talk me through setting an IV, Donnie?" she asked softly. "You lost a fair amount of blood and you're looking a bit pale. I think a bag of blood might be on the menu for you too."

Donnie turned his head slowly to look up at her, blinking several times before slowly shaking his head. "Can't," he mumbled simply.

April frowned. "What do you mean, "can't," she asked. "I watched you with the others and it didn't look too hard. I'm pretty sure I can do it, Donnie.'

He continued to shake his head. "Not the IV," he clarified. "I just can't have any blood. There _is_ no more.'

April stared down at him in surprise, before looking back over her shoulder at the others and doing a mental calculation in her mind. She knew Donnie kept two bags of blood for each of them in reserve in the fridge. Both Mikey and Raph had used both of their bags, and Leo…

She blinked in dawning comprehension. She remembered Donnie telling her that his blood was compatible with Leo's. The oldest turtle had required more blood than the others, and so Donnie had used his own reserve supply on his brother. The implications were grim. With no more blood in supply, if Leo _did_ happen to need surgery, his chances of surviving had just plummeted from grim to somewhere next to zero.

The whole situation drove home just how close this night had been to disaster. How close it _still_ was.

"It's okay," Donnie murmured softly, reading the distress in her face and immediately trying to comfort her. "I'll just replenish my own supply the good old fashioned way…with plenty of rest and fluids."

April glanced toward the now empty mug sitting on the desk, frowning. "You know coffee doesn't count, right?"

Donnie gave a small shrug. "I needed the caffeine," he stated simply.

"You need to _rest_," April corrected, fixing Donnie with one of her stern looks. "There's a carton of apple juice in the fridge. I'm going to bring you a cup, and then you're going to get some sleep." She pointed a finger forcefully toward the small cot in the corner of the lab, knowing there was zero chance she would be able to get him to leave the lab, and not really wanting to try. "Even if I have to haul you to the bed and sit on you to make you stay! And right now, I honestly don't think you'd be able to stop me."

Donnie arched an eye ridge, but he didn't try to argue with her. Probably was too tired to argue. Instead he merely nodded. "Get me that juice and I'll do another check on the guys. If everything seems okay then I'll lay down for a bit, okay?"

It wasn't a full agreement, but April would take what she could get. She nodded, then turned and navigated around the mess on the floor toward the door.

As soon as she stepped from the lab she could hear the loud snores coming from the couch. Smiling wryly she detoured from her task long enough to grab one of the blankets from the cabinet next to the TV and drape it across Casey's prone form. Other than several minor cuts and bruises, as well as a re-strained shoulder, Casey had managed to avoid the serious injuries that had plagued the others. Still, April knew just how close she had come to losing him as well. When she and Splinter had gone to fetch him and she had seen his perilous location within the drainage shaft, her heart had nearly failed her. It had been close. Way _too_ close.

Bending down, she brushed his forehead with a soft kiss before straightening and resuming her trek to the kitchen.

When she returned to the lab a couple of minutes later she found Donnie hovering over Leo's bed, a frown etching deep lines on his already drawn face.

"What is it?" April asked, coming to stand next to him and peering down at Leo. It appeared he was resting peacefully, and a glance toward the monitoring equipment showed that his oxygen levels and pulse were within normal ranges.

"He's got a fever." Donnie replied softly.

Frowning, April reached out and rested the back of her hand against Leo's forehead. Immediately she felt the heat radiating from his skin, and she turned worried eyes to Donnie. "Do you think his wounds are infected?"

Donnie gave a small shrug. "It's possible. Or it could just be his body reacting to all the trauma it's sustained. I'll give him a dose of antibiotics though, just to be safe."

"That should help, right?" April asked, detecting a note of doubt in Donnie's words.

Again Donnie shrugged. "It won't hurt. But right now he's incredibly weak. He can't really afford any further complications."

April wanted to offer words of encouragement, but they got stuck in her throat. She knew Donnie was right. Leo was balancing on a fine edge right now, and the slightest thing could tip him over. It was a frightening thought.

Donnie obviously shared her fear. "We lost him once and it nearly destroyed us," he whispered, his voice tight. "I don't know what we'd do if we lost him again."

April felt her heart ache at the raw fear and grief in her friend's voice. She reached out and gripped his arm, squeezing tightly. "That's not going to happen," she stated firmly, forcing her own concerns to some dark corner in the back of her mind. "He's going to be just fine, Donnie." She forced a smile to her face as she repeated Mikey's earlier words, "We just have to have faith."

Donnie didn't reply, his gaze locked on his brother's still form. Finally he gave a small nod, then turned away without looking at her and headed for the cabinet where he kept his medicines. She couldn't be sure in the dim light, but she thought she might have seen tears shimmering on his face.

April closed her eyes and breathed out a long sigh, then opened them again to look down at Leo. She reached out a laid a hand on his chest, right above where she knew his heart beat. A heart of courage. A heart of strength. "You'll be okay, Leo," she whispered, staring into his still face. "You _have_ to be okay. Your family needs you."

And if April had to hold on to faith for all them, then that was just what she would do.

TBC...

_Please review. _


	28. Chapter 28

_Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed last chapter. I was blown away by the overwhelming response! I appreciate each and every one of you more than I can say! You totally keep me motivated._

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The chaos caused by the gang war down in the Bronx was all over the morning news.

The police had cordoned off the area until full order could be restored and their investigations completed, but that of course didn't stop the reporters and their camera crews. Almost every local channel was plastered with the words "Breaking News," and featured pictures of burned out buildings, smashed store fronts, glass littered streets, and vandalized cars and buildings. It looked like coverage straight from a war zone, and the cameras caught the look of shock on the faces of the emerging residents as they struggled to comprehend the violence that had erupted right on their front steps.

Early casualty reports varied widely as each news station reported whatever information was passed along to them, giving little regard to the reliability of the source, nor taking the time to sort fact from fiction. All that seemed absolutely sure was that there _had _been injuries, and there _had_ been deaths, and the police had made dozens of arrests already, with more expected as the day progressed. News anchors speculated on the cause and motives behind the eruption of violence, while the police chief and city mayor attended early morning press conferences to try to ensure the city they had everything under control.

Casey Jones had seen and heard it all before. After all, he had lived in this city since he was a kid, and while gang wars were thankfully rare, they were still an inescapable aspect of life in the Big Apple. The news would focus on it almost exclusively over the next couple of days before finding something else more interesting to report on. In a week or two it would be all but forgotten by most of the city's residents. Only those most closely affected would continue to remember, carrying the mental and physical scars with them in silent testimony.

Lifting the remote, Casey muted the TV in the middle of the mayor's speech thanking and praising New York's officers for their role in curtailing the violence. Leaning his head against the back of the couch, he rolled his neck until he was staring at the silent doorway leading into the lab. His friends were gathered in there, tired and hurting, four unappreciated lives that would never be added to the official casualty report. The city would never know what the four teenagers had done for it. There would be no speeches thanking them for their bravery and sacrifice. There would be no special news reports highlighting their acts of heroism. There would be no top notch medical care offered to heal their bodies and minds.

Casey didn't usually allow himself to dwell too much on the unfairness of the world, but right now he couldn't help the bitterness swelling in his chest. He knew the guys had never asked for recognition. They did what they did and they never complained about the lack of thanks. But that didn't make it any easier to swallow, especially when their involvement kept taking more and more away from them. What made it worse was that he was the one who had called Raphael last night. He was the one who had involved them in this whole mess in the first place, and now they were in very real danger of losing one of their own. Again.

If Fate had a physical form, Casey would have been the first in line to kick its ass.

Pulling in a deep lungful of air, he released it on a gusty sigh, then began to push himself to his feet, ignoring the aches of his tired and abused body. He'd been steering clear of the med lab to give the guys some room, but supposed a quick peak around the doorjamb to check in on them wouldn't hurt anything. He didn't like how quiet everything was.

He had taken a single step from the couch when April appeared in the doorway, her hair mussed and her eyes ringed red with exhaustion. She didn't even seem to notice him standing a few yards in front of her as she turned and made a beeline for the kitchen, muttering softly under her breath. Casey altered his course to follow her, stepping into the kitchen to find her riffling through doors and cabinets in a hurried, if somewhat distracted, manner.

"Can I help?"

April started at his soft question, turning to look over one shoulder at him even as she began to pull dishtowels from the drawer in front of her. "Hey," she greeted, offering him a tired smile, "I didn't know you were up."

Casey shrugged, then winced as the movement pulled at his bruised shoulder. "Been awake for a while now," he admitted, before asking softly, "How are the guys?"

A shadow fell across April's face, and she quickly turned away. "About as can be expected, I suppose," she answered, her voice soft and weighted with worry. "Leo's fever is getting worse. Donnie's got him on the strongest antibiotic he has, but so far it doesn't seem to be helping much."

Casey felt his stomach sink, but he forced his voice neutral as he replied, "Sometimes it just takes time for the drugs to kick in." It sounded lame and desperate even to his own ears, but he wanted to offer something to take the hopelessness from April's voice.

She sighed, moving over to the freezer and pulling out several ice packs and tucking them into the bundle of towels she already carried in her hand. "I guess," she answered tiredly. "Until then, we'll just have to try and keep the fever down the old fashioned way." She brandished the pile in her arms.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Casey asked, walking with her from the kitchen and back toward the lab.

April frowned, seeming to honestly consider the question before slowly shaking her head. "I don't think so. It's just a waiting game right now. But you can come in and see everyone if you like."

Casey followed her a step into the room, his eyes immediately drawn to the bed in the far corner and the four shapes surrounding it. Once again the unnatural quiet of the place hit him, and his stomach did an odd little twist. He'd experienced this quiet before…in a tiny hospital room on the far end of town the day he had sat beside his mother's bed as she drew her final breaths. It was a moment forever burned into his mind, the pain dulled by the years but still very much present, and he found himself pulling up short, suddenly unwilling to go any farther.

"I think I'll just wait out in the living room," he whispered, his eyes still glued to the scene across the med lab. "If you need me, just give me a call." It was a coward's move, but he knew he wouldn't be able to do anything even if he stayed. It was _after_ that he would be most needed. No matter _what_ happened.

April paused, regarding him with understanding eyes before stepping back to his side and rising up on tip toes to kiss his cheek. "I will," she promised, before turning and hurrying with her bundle over to the bed.

Casey backed out of the lab, then returned to the couch, slumping down on the cushions with a small grunt. He didn't bother un-muting the TV, but continued to let it play on silently. He barely saw the pictures, his mind's eye too full of the mental image of the med lab, and his extended family sitting silently as death hung heavy in the air around them.

With a low moan Casey let his head drop into his hands and did something he had not done in a very long time; he prayed.

* * *

Mikey hated the med lab.

In general he loved their home, despite it being located deep in the bowels of the earth. When he thought of the lair, he thought of warmth, of family, of safety. Each room in their home held a special meaning and special memories for him, most of them good.

The med lab was the one exception to that. This was where they always came when they were sick, hurt, and bleeding, and the memories associated with that weren't so great. He'd watched a TV show once where the main character had _hated_ hospitals with extreme prejudice. Though not quite as dramatic, Mikey had compared those feeling with his own distaste of the med lab, and he avoided the room whenever possible.

But here he was now, his own aches and pains all but forgotten as he stared down at a brother struggling to hold onto life. He felt like he was in some sort of trance, in one way completely aware of everything going on around him, but at the same time distanced from it all, like his brain simply refused to fully engage. It was probably some kind of unintentional defense mechanism he had thrown up in his own mind, because he was pretty sure if he took the time to think about everything, he would completely lose it.

Leo shifted on the bed, letting out a soft moan, his head tossing restlessly across the pillow, and Mikey had to consciously loosen the tight hold he held around his brother's hand. Leo muttered something incomprehensible, his eyes rolling wildly beneath his lids, his mind obviously trapped somewhere unpleasant.

A fever dream. That's what Donnie had called it. Mikey didn't care what its name was, he just wanted Leo to wake up. But this wasn't like other dreams. Leo wasn't just asleep, he was unconscious, and no amount of calling his name or shaking his shoulders would pull him from whatever terror his subconscious was forcing on him.

"No!" Leo suddenly cried, his whole body arching up from the bed. Mikey quickly leaned forward to help hold his brother down while Raph did the same on the other side, their grip strong yet gentle, mindful of Leo's injuries. Their brother had already torn the stitches in one arm earlier by thrashing around, and now they were all careful to keep him as immobilized as possible when he grew too restless. Splinter bent down and began to smooth one furry paw across Leo's brow, murmuring softly in Japanese in an attempt to soothe Leo back into a more restful state.

It was a scene that had replayed itself over and over again within the last several hours, ever since Leo's temperature had skyrocketed and he had begun to toss fretfully. Donnie had done everything he could with his limited medical supplies, and now they could only sit around Leo's bed and watch and wait, trying to keep him as calm as possible so he wouldn't injure himself further. Listening to his big brother's harsh breathing and unintelligible mutterings, Mikey couldn't help but think he had somehow fallen asleep and gotten trapped in his own nightmare. One that he couldn't seem to wake up from, no matter how badly he wanted to.

The machine monitoring his brother's vitals kept flashing numbers, but Mikey barely paid it any attention. He didn't really understand what the numbers meant anyway, but judging by the way Donnie and April kept glancing at the machine and frowning, he knew it couldn't be anything good.

"Please…"Leo suddenly whispered, the word coming out clear but strained, a desperate edge to his tone.

Mikey's gaze snapped to Leo's face, half thinking his brother might finally be awake, but Leo's eyes were still firmly shut, his head still rocking back and forth in the throes of the fever dream.

"Please," he repeated again, this time whisper soft and barely audible. "…don't leave me."

Across the bed, Raph jerked as though struck, and beside him Donnie made a small noise in the back of his throat, a cross between a gasp and a sob. The mental barrier in Mikey's brain crumbled, and he gripped Leo's hand so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"It's just the fever talking, guys," April whispered from her spot at the foot of the bed, the shakiness in her voice belying her efforts at sounding calm. "It's just a dream."

No one answered. There was nothing to say. Whatever horror Leo was reliving might just be a dream, but that didn't mean it hadn't really happened. That didn't make it any less real, or Leo's pleas any easier to listen to. It didn't erase the dead look that had crept into Raph's eyes, or the hopelessness that bowed Donnie's shoulders. It didn't ease the guilt and desperation slowly creeping over Mikey. As hard as he tried not to think about it, he couldn't silence the little voice in the back of his head that reminded him over and over again that twice now Leo had acted to protect him, and had faced death as a result. He knew there was nothing he could have done to change the situation, and that acting the hero was just a part of who Leo was, but that didn't help him to feel any better. It didn't make him feel any less responsible.

As the morning wore on, Leo's ramblings died away to barely audible mutterings, his restless thrashing giving way to only the occasional twitch. Mikey wanted to believe it was due to his brother finally getting some real rest, but suspected it had more to do with Leo's body weakening to the point it could no longer sustain the more aggressive movement. It was a grim observation that left a heavy weight in the pit of his stomach. He was suddenly glad he was gripping his brother's hand so tightly, otherwise he might have given in to his sudden wild desire to turn and bolt from the room and not look back. To escape into the sewers and just start running and never, ever stop.

It wasn't the first time he had felt this urge.

Against his will his thoughts turned back to those first horrible days all those months ago when their family had thought Leo dead. Mikey had been caught in an uncharacteristic depression that had almost torn him apart from the inside out. He had fought the urge to run then, too, and only the weakness caused by his head injury had stopped him. Instead he had locked himself up in his room for several long weeks, lying on his bed and counting his breaths as a way to keep his mind distracted from unwanted thoughts.

He still wasn't entirely sure how he had managed to pull through that dark time. His family had helped, despite being trapped in their own grief…but even with their presence and support, Mikey had struggled to pull himself free from the suffocating sadness and depression that continually tried to pull him under. Things had gotten a little easier with the passage of time, but every new morning Mikey had been forced to fight back the pain and grief all over again.

Now, with the very real threat of losing Leo hanging over all of them once more, Mikey couldn't help but doubt his ability to survive going through all that a second time. He could barely even comprehend it. He'd always known that Fate was an uncaring mistress, but bringing his brother back from the proverbial grave, only to snatch him away again, was a cruelty he couldn't even begin to fathom. The world shouldn't work that way. His father was always talking about karma; do good things, and good will happen to you. Well, if that was truly the case, than Leo shouldn't be in this hated room right now. He shouldn't be fighting for his life. It just wasn't fair.

"Leo?"

Raph's soft voice pulled Mikey from his dark thoughts. He glanced over to find his red banded brother staring intently down at the bed. Mikey followed his gaze, his heart picking up speed when he saw Leo obviously struggling to open his eyes. As one, they all leaned forward, hovering over the bed as they waited anxiously to see if their brother would win the fight for consciousness.

"Come on, Leo," Donnie murmured, his gaze flickering back and forth between Leo's face and the machine monitoring his vitals. "You can do it."

"My son," Splinter murmured, one hand still resting lightly across Leo's forehead. "We are here with you."

Mikey wanted to add his own encouragement, but his throat was suddenly too tight. If Leo really was struggling to wake up, that had to be a good sign, right? It had to mean his brother was doing better? Maybe they weren't going to lose him after all. His heart wanted to soar at the thought, but a niggling sense of doubt continued to weigh him down. Leo still looked so incredibly weak and drawn, struggling simply to open his eyes, and Mikey knew it would take more than just wishful thinking to bring his brother back from the edge he was currently teetering on.

After what seemed like ages to his anxiously waiting family, Leo's eyelids finally peeled part way open, revealing the barest slit of navy blue. A second later their ill brother drew in a deep and shuddering breath, his eyes opening slightly further, his gaze somewhat glassy from fever, but otherwise alert and aware as he slowly looked up at all of them.

"Hey there," Raph was the first to greet him, his voice uncharacteristically soft and gentle. Mikey found his own voice blending in with Donnie, Sensei, and April as they all called out their own soft greetings.

Leo blinked slowly, his throat working as though he were trying to speak, but no words coming out. His eyes were still heavy lidded, and it looked like it was taking a monumental effort just to keep them open at all.

"Easy," Donnie soothed. "Just relax Leo. You don't need to talk right now." His eyes continued to flick back and forth between Leo's face and the monitoring equipment in a way that was beginning to drive Mikey crazy. "We're just glad to see you awake."

In response Leo's eyes drifted closed again, then just as quickly darted back open, his breathing quickening. Once more his gaze flickered to each of their faces, and Mikey got the distinct impression that his brother had something he wanted to say. His suspicions were proved correct a moment later when Leo gathered enough strength to rasp out a weak, "Need…to tell…"

He never finished his sentence, and Mikey was caught between the desire to back Donnie up and urge him to keep quiet and reserve his strength, and the need to hear him keep talking. It was painful to watch how hard it was for him to simply speak, but at the same time as long as he was awake and trying to communicate with them, he wasn't unconscious and drifting further and further away.

Across the bed Donnie and Raph exchanged a quick look, before Raph reached out a hand and gripped Leo's shoulder tightly. "It's okay," he stated softly. "If you'd like, I can tell them for you?"

Mikey frowned, not sure what Raph was talking about. How would his brother know what Leo was trying to say? What exactly was he missing here? He opened his mouth to ask what Raph was talking about, but then his gaze met Leo's, their eyes locking, and the words died on his tongue. Leo had always had the ability to communicate a wealth of information with just his eyes, and right now there was something intense in his oldest brother's look, even as the navy orbs reflected a soft fondness that Mikey hadn't seen since…

His breath caught, his heart fluttering wildly inside his chest, a desperate hope and longing igniting somewhere deep inside his soul. He stared down intently at his brother, unable to look away, reading more from Leo's single look than he could have gained from a hundred words.

With a soft sigh, Leo gave the barest hint of a nod, his gaze flickering over to Raph before returning to Mikey.

"He remembers you Mikey," Raph stated without preamble, confirming the suspicion already growing in Mikey's heart. "He remembers all of us. He told me on the way back home, and when I quizzed him he answered every question correctly. I don't know how, but he really does remember." Raph's tone was soft, but the lingering wonderment and joy underlying his words was undeniable.

At the foot of the bed April made a sound that sounded like a soft sob, but Mikey couldn't tear his gaze from his brother to look at her. His own heart was exploding with joy, and he realized distantly that he was squeezing Leo's hand so tightly that his fingers were beginning to cramp. His vision was blurring from unbidden tears, but he didn't bother trying to wipe them away. He merely leaned in over the bed and lowered his forehead to his brothers, portraying without words the overwhelming emotions sweeping through him. All the pain and worry of the last several hours instantly dissolved in the face of this new joy, and he wanted nothing more than to gather Leo up in a bone crushing hug. But he knew that would have to wait until later, when his brother wasn't so…fragile.

"I suspected this might be the case," Splinter was saying from above them, his own voice filled with a soft pride and joy. "When he returned from the spirit plane and insisted on going after you all, there was something different about him. I had hoped this was the reason."

_Spirit plane? _Mikey wasn't sure what his father was talking about, but there would be time enough later for explanations. Right now all that he cared about was that everything he had been so desperately wishing for had come true. Leo was returned to them, fully and completely, and Mikey couldn't remember ever feeling happier.

He leaned back, grinning down at his brother widely, feeling so light he was surprised he wasn't floating. The sensation didn't last for long. While Leo was doing his best to return his smile with a weak one of his own, there was something in his eyes that immediately caught Mikey's attention. His gaze shone with love and relief, but beneath it all Mikey also detected a hint of sadness and resignation, and something else as well…

Acceptance.

In his euphoric state it took him a moment to piece it all together, but once he did he felt a coldness sweep over him, dampening his joy as quickly as it had come. He suddenly understood why Leo had fought so hard through his obvious pain and exhaustion to wake up. Why he had seemed so desperate to speak, even when they had urged him to rest and save his strength.

Telling them that he remembered them was Leo's way of saying goodbye.

Tearing his gaze from his oldest brother, Mikey looked desperately around at the rest of his family, wondering if they too realized what had just dawned on him. All it took was one glance to know that they had. Splinter was smoothing his hand across the top of Leo's head, staring down at his son while tears dampened the fur beneath his eyes. Both Raph and Donnie had their heads bowed, their expressions hidden from Mikey, but their body language spoke volumes. Both had reached out to grip some part of Leo's body, as though they could physically hold him back from fading away from them. At the foot of the bed April stood with tears running freely down her face, her expression one of despair.

Mikey's gaze snapped back down to his oldest brother, watching as Leo released a deep sigh, his eyelids fluttering as though about to close.

Something deep inside him snapped, and before he even realized what he was doing he had reached down and grabbed Leo by his shoulders, giving him a sharp shake.

"No!" The single word tore from his still bruised and swollen throat in a hoarse shout, causing those gathered around the bed to jump in surprise. But Mikey wasn't paying attention to them. All his attention was on Leo, who had reopened his eyes and was staring up at him in confused surprise. "Don't you dare, Leo," Mikey snapped, his hands tightening on his brother's shoulders, distantly aware that he was probably hurting him, but unable to stop regardless. "Don't you dare give up!"

"Mikey…" Donnie started to say, but Mikey just continued right over the top of him. He couldn't stop now. It was as if some sort of dam had burst inside, and he couldn't keep the words from flowing as quick and furious as the tears running down his face.

"If you give up now, I'll _never_ forgive you. Do you hear me, Leo? _Never!_ I'll hate you to my dying day!"

As soon as the words slipped from his mouth, Mikey felt something deep inside burst in a fiery explosion of pain. He suddenly couldn't say anything more…couldn't even _breathe_. He was dimly aware of the gasp of surprise from the rest of the family, and the way Leo's eyes had widened into huge, dark pools of pain. It looked like he was trying to say something, but Mikey couldn't stay and listen to whatever it was. The fierce ache in his chest demanded movement, and before he was even aware of what he was doing he had released Leo and turned and fled from the lab.

He heard them calling him, but he ignored it, barreling from the room and nearly colliding with Casey who was standing a few feet from the door, a concerned look on his face. Mikey darted past him and then up the stairs, careening into his room and slamming the door behind him. He threw himself onto his bed, burying his head in his pillow just in time to muffle the sobs tearing free from deep in his chest.

* * *

Leo stared after the retreating shell of his youngest brother, wanting nothing more than to jump from the bed and race after him, but too weak to even call out. Instead he closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing, struggling to remain conscious and not give in to the darkness trying to drag him under. Mikey's words echoed over and over again inside his head, but that wasn't what hurt the most. The look on his little brother's face was seared into his memory, and even with his eyes closed he could clearly picture the pain and betrayal written clearly in the sky blue irises.

He wished Mikey could understand. He didn't _want_ to give up. He wanted to stay here…with his family. But he just wasn't strong enough. He had fought as hard as he could, but he could feel the cold fingers of death closing in around him, and he was powerless to stop it. He was just so tired. Tired of the pain. Tired of the memories that haunted him in the darkness. Just…_tired_.

He heard his family talking above him, their words lost to him but not the pain and worry in their voices. Knowing that he was the one responsible for that pain was almost unbearable. He felt like he was somehow letting them down, and it hurt…damn but it _hurt_! He couldn't help but wonder if they all shared the same feelings…the same disappointment in his lack of ability to fight off death. Did they think he had given in too easily?

'Am_ I giving in too easily_?'

A small voice inside his head denied this thought vehemently. He _had_ fought. Fought hard. And now he deserved to rest. He deserved a little peace. He deserved an escape from the pain and nightmares. Couldn't his family understand this? Couldn't they just let him go?

'_Would I let them go if our positions were reversed_?'

As much as he might not want to face the truth, he knew the answer without a shadow of a doubt. He would urge them to fight until the last breath…to _never_ give in, no matter how inevitable the end result may seem. And if even for a moment he thought they were giving up too soon…well, his reaction would make Mikey's seem tame by comparison.

So how could he do any differently?

He was weak and tired and in pain, but he would just have to keep fighting. He owed that much to his family. It wasn't a battle he believed he could win, but if death wanted him, it would have to take him kicking and screaming…at least metaphorically. It was harder this way…but it was all he could offer his family; an inadequate apology for the pain he was causing them. And when it was all over, he hoped they would know he had fought until the bitter end.

'_I'm not giving up, Mikey,'_ he whispered silently to himself. '_I promise, I'm fighting.'_

* * *

He should be used to it by now, but Donatello was still amazed at just how draining worry and grief could be both physically and mentally. Add to that a body that is injured and exhausted…not to mention of few pints low in the blood department…and he was more than a little amazed that he was still conscious, let alone standing. As it was, he knew his brain wasn't exactly firing on all cylinders.

Exactly how long had he been standing in front of Mikey's door now?

With what seemed to take far more effort than it should, he raised his fist and knocked, unsurprised when he received no answer. "Mikey," he called, lowering his hand and leaning his shoulder and side of his head against the cool wood. "I'm coming in."

No reply.

With a tired sigh, Donnie reached for the doorknob, pushing the door open while part of his weight was still leaning against it. The result was a half fall, half stumble into his brother's dark room, and it was only by some miracle that he didn't end up flat on his face on the floor.

"Ouch," he muttered, his battered body complaining about the sudden jolt.

Shaking his head at his own foolishness, he looked up to find Mikey staring at him with wide eyes from where he sat cross legged on the bed, a pillow clutched tightly to his chest as though it were a shield. Mikey's eyes were bloodshot and red rimmed, and the pillow clutched in his hands looked suspiciously damp.

Carefully navigating the piles of junk on his little brother's floor, Donnie moved until he could sink down on the end of the bed, releasing a long and weary sigh as his shell met the wall with a dull thunk. He turned to observe his brother, unsurprised when Mikey avoided meeting his eyes, his gaze locked on the bedspread beneath him. Everything about his posture screamed of tension, his body held stiff and unyielding, the muscles in his arm standing out in sharp relief beneath his green skin.

"Are you alright?" Donnie asked softly, already knowing the answer but hoping he could get his brother to open up and speak to him.

Mikey flinched, his eyes darting up to meet Donnie's before quickly looking away again. "Don't," he ground out, his voice painfully horse and gruff. "Just…just _tell_ me, okay. Don't…" he paused, swallowing hard, "d-don't d-drag it out."

Donnie frowned, for a moment not understanding what Mikey was talking about. Then his tired mind belatedly decided to work, and it dawned on him what his brother was waiting for. His heart gave a painful thrum, and he reached out to grip Mikey's forearm. "Leo's not dead," he stated simply, grateful he could relieve his brother's fear quickly. "Quite opposite actually. His fever broke a while ago and his vitals are back in the normal range. He's resting peacefully."

Mikey's head snapped up, his expression a painful mix of disbelief and raw, desperate hope. "He's alive?" he whispered, his shimmering eyes locking on Donnie's and searching intently, as though afraid to fully believe what he was hearing.

Donnie merely nodded, offering his brother a gentle smile. "Yeah, he's alive."

"And he's going to be okay?"

Donnie hesitated, thinking about how weak his brother still was and all the things that could still go wrong, but… "Yeah, Mikey, I really do think so. It's going to take some time for him to recover fully, but I think the worst of the danger is behind us now."

Mikey made a small sound in the back of his throat and all the tension seemed to drain from his body, leaving him hunched over, his head dropping down to bury in the pillow he still clutched to his chest. Donnie completely understood his brother's reaction, and he squeezed Mikey's arm before releasing him and slumping back against the wall.

It had been close…so very close. Donnie could only hope he would never have to go through anything like that ever again. Standing helplessly by and watching his brother fight for each and every breath had been pure torture. He had been so certain that they were going to lose Leo that he wasn't sure what to think when his brother's temperature had finally dropped and his vitals had begun to creep back toward normal ranges. It had taken over an hour of watching Leo sleeping peacefully before he'd finally allowed himself to believe that their big brother really was going to make it after all.

The relief in that moment had been immense, and after all the hours of tension, the exhaustion that followed was even greater. Master Splinter and April had taken charge, forcing Raph to lie down on the second bed in the lab and insisting that Donnie get some rest as well. Knowing his family would come and get him if he were needed, Donnie had made the trek up the stairs to check on his little brother before getting some much needed rest himself. After seeing the state Mikey was in, he was glad it was good news he'd brought with him.

"I shouldn't have yelled at him," Mikey stated softly, drawing Donnie from his thoughts. His voice was muted, both by emotions and the pillow in front of his face, but Donnie still heard him.

Releasing a soft sigh, Donnie let his head fall back against the wall behind him, watching his little brother out of the corner of one eye. "You were tired and scared, Mikey. We all let our emotions get the better of us in those kinds of situations. Besides, I think it actually helped."

Mikey let out an incredulous sound, lifting his head to stare at Donnie accusingly, obviously thinking his brother was trying to console him with empty words.

"It's true," Donnie defended. "You know how Master Splinter is always telling us the mind and body are intricately linked? Well, I think mentally Leo had already given up, and so his physical body was dying as well. When you yelled at him, you gave him a sort of jump start to get him back fighting long enough for the antibiotics to finally kick in and do their work. That's no small thing, Mikey. You probably saved his life."

Mikey looked as though he couldn't quite bring himself to fully believe what Donnie was saying. "I…I still wish I hadn't said those things," he admitted, dropping his gaze back down to the blanket. "As soon as I left I wanted to go back…to apologize, but…"he trailed off, his throat working as he fought to control his emotions.

Donnie understood. If things had ended up differently—a scenario he didn't really like to contemplate _at all_—Mikey would have had to live with the knowledge that his last words to Leo had been harsh and spoken in anger. It was that kind of guilt that would quietly tear a person apart from the inside out…had obviously already been tearing Mikey apart. He had sat in here all alone for hours, waiting for someone to come and tell him Leo was dead. Donnie couldn't even imagine the kind of pain his little brother must have been in.

Without thought, Donnie scooted in closer, throwing one arm around Mikey's un-bandaged shoulder and pulling his little brother in for a fierce hug. Always the most physical of all of them, Mikey didn't even try to resist. Instead, he wrapped his arms around Donnie's waist and buried his head against his shoulder. His entire form was trembling, and Donnie felt his heart ache for his younger brother's distress. The day had been nothing but an emotional roller coaster for all of them, and quite honestly he wasn't sure how he had managed to keep his own composure for so long.

"I didn't mean it," Mikey choked. "I could _never_ hate him. _Never_! No m-matter what h-happened."

Donnie nodded, his chin bumping against the top of his brother's head. "I know, Mikey," he whispered, his own voice tight with emotion. "And Leo knows too."

Mikey sniffed loudly against his shoulder but didn't say anything in reply. Donnie knew his brother wouldn't feel completely better until he had a chance to talk to Leo, but the fact that he would actually get that chance was nothing short of a miracle, and Mikey had to know it. Relief and regret were strange bedfellows, but Donnie knew brother had to be feeling them both in no small measure.

Eventually Mikey pulled from the embrace, wiping one hand self-consciously across his swollen eyes. "Sorry," he muttered. "I didn't mean to get all weepy on you."

Donnie grinned, giving his brother a gentle shove as he removed his arm from around Mikey's shoulders. "There's nothing to apologize for," he retorted lightly. "And I think we're _all_ feeling a bit weepy right about now." He didn't tell Mikey about the tearful hug he had gotten from their most abrasive brother right before leaving the lab. Raph might not be in any condition to pound him now, but eventually his wounds would heal, and Donnie didn't want to risk it.

Mikey's face lit up in a sudden grin, the old familiar sparkle returning to his eyes once more. "I still can't believe he's going to be okay," he breathed, the excitement and joy in his voice obvious, as though the full impact of the news was just now dawning on him. "I…I think I'd like to go see him now, if that's okay?"

Donnie nodded, smiling at his brother in understanding. "Of course," he replied easily. "He's sleeping now, but I think he'd want you there." He knew Mikey needed to get some rest as well, but after seeing the torture his little brother had been putting himself through, he knew Mikey needed to see Leo was alright with his own eyes. He could rest after.

Mikey didn't need any more encouragement than that. Dropping his pillow he jumped from the bed and hurried to the door, pausing only long enough to turn and offer a quick but heartfelt, "Thanks, Don," before disappearing around the jam.

Donnie stared after him, the smile still playing around the edges of his mouth. Just like Mikey he was still struggling to comprehend how quickly things had gone from hopeless to hopeful. He knew they all had a lot more healing to do, and not just physically, but as long as they were all together…as long as they were _whole_…he had no doubt that they _would_ heal.

Deciding the ten steps across the hall to his room were ten steps too many, Donnie stretched out across Mikey's bed, grabbing his brother's discarded pillow and flipping it to the non-damp side. His eyes were closed before his body had even completely settled, and less than a second later he was fast asleep.

TBC

_Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Drop me a review if you have the time. They are seriously my bread and butter!_


	29. Chapter 29

_Hello everyone_!

_I must apologize profusely for the extremely long wait. I had hoped to have this story finished well before Christmas, but real life had other plans. I won't bore you with details, but I spent much of October in the Hospital and the following months were focused almost exclusively on recovery. Things are beginning to return more towards normal, and I've been working feverishly to get this chapter done so you wouldn't have to wait any longer. It's a bit heavy with dialogue, but hopefully still good._

_Thanks again for all the reviews and personal messages. They have been such an encouragement to me!_

_TWO WEEKS LATER_

"Okay Leo, just remember to take it easy."

Raph hid his smile as Leo cast Donnie a look of mild irritation, muttering, "Yeah, I hear you Donnie. In fact, I heard you the first three times you said it…and the fifteen times you said it yesterday, and the two dozen times you said it the day before! You act like I'm going to try to make a run for it or something."

"That's because he knows you, bro," Mikey called from the far side of the room, grinning cheekily at his slowly approaching brother. "You're just waiting for us to take our eyes off you so you can escape to the dojo and start training again."

Leo paused in his slow walk across the med lab, closing his eyes and pulling in a deep breath. Raph unobtrusively took a small step closer to his brother in case he needed help, but after only a brief pause Leo reopened his eyes and continued forward, a look of steely determination in his eyes.

"You forget," he told Mikey, his voice coming out strained and breathless, "that Master Splinter…has banned me from the dojo…until further notice."

From Leo's far side Donnie let out a soft snort. "Yeah, like that has ever stopped you before. The last time you were banned from the dojo we found you practicing your katas in your bedroom instead. Excuse me for feeling the need to stress the importance of taking it easy to a brother who has shown he doesn't really know what that even means."

Leo didn't answer, either because he had no argument or because he was saving what breath he had for the trip back to the bed. Raph suspected the latter. Despite Mikey's teasing, it was painfully obvious that Leo wouldn't be practicing anytime soon, inside or out of the dojo. A single trip across the lab and back took all the energy he had and usually left him pale and worn out for the remainder of the day.

A few more shuffling steps and Leo reached Mikey, who immediately lifted his right hand up above his head. Leo took a deep breath then reached up with his left arm and slapped his palm gently against Mikey's. The orange banded turtle grinned at him, then switched arms, lifting his left up high and making Leo repeat the slap with his right hand.

"Any numbness or tingling?" Donnie asked as both brothers lowered their arms.

Leo shook his head wearily. "Sore is all," he muttered.

Raph shared a relieved look with Donnie. There had been some worry that the gruesome stab wounds to Leo's arms may have caused some nerve damage, but so far early signs seemed to indicate that wasn't the case.

"When you've caught you breath, let's head back to the bed," Donnie instructed. "I've got a few more activities I want to do to test your fine motor skills, and then you can sleep for a while."

At the mention of sleep Leo grimaced, dropping his head and muttering "I don't need a nap" under his breath.

Raph frowned down at the back of Leo's head. Normally he would have been amused at his older brother sounding like a petulant five year old, but in this instance he found little humor in it. Leo had begun to avoid sleep whenever he could get away with it, and they all knew the reason why. Their brother's sleep had been anything but restful of late. Nightmares plagued him relentlessly and they'd all witnessed him jerking awake, gasping wildly and clawing at his throat, raw terror in his eyes.

Raph had thought the nightmares would fade with time, but in actuality the exact opposite seemed to be happening. No matter how much sleep he got, Leo looked perpetually exhausted, and though he put on a good show in front of his family, none of them missed the haunted look that had come into his eyes. It was obvious that he was suffering from more than just his physical wounds, but in typical Leo fashion, he refused to talk about it, preferring to deal with his inner demons on his own. It was almost like he was afraid to show any weakness in front of them. Like he thought it would change the way they looked at him, or undermine his position as leader in some way. Or maybe he thought he was protecting them by shouldering the burden all on his own.

Whatever the case, Raph was just about done with it. Donnie said Leo needed rest in order to heal properly, and Raph wasn't about to let anything get in the way of his brother's recovery…even Leo himself. So far he'd respected his brother's unspoken request for privacy, but that was going to change. It was time for an intervention, and Raph could tell from the look in his two younger brothers' eyes that they were thinking the exact same thing.

Reaching out Raph gripped Leo's elbow in one hand, causing his brother to look up at him in surprise. "Let's get you back to the bed," Raph instructed, meeting his brother's searching eyes with a steady gaze. "I think you've had enough for one day."

Leo nodded, allowing Raph to help steady him as he turned and began the short return trip back across the lab. When they finally made it to the bed, Leo sank onto it with a grimace, his face pale and a fine sheen of sweet standing out on his green skin. He didn't complain about the pain…that wasn't Leo's way, but they all knew he was hurting. Raph helped his brother back into a semi reclining position, Mikey piling the pillows behind him while Donnie went to grab some painkillers and a glass of water.

For the next ten minutes Mikey and Raph stood back and watched as Donnie ran Leo through a series of tests to check their brother's fine motor skills. Leo completed each of the tasks Donnie gave him without complaint and with his typical drive for excellence. When they were done, Donnie stepped back, his eyes shining with genuine relief.

"You dodged a bullet with this one, Leo," he stated, giving their brother a wide smile. "I think it's safe to say the swords missed hitting anything vital. You'll be sore for a while, but I don't think there will be any permanent damage from this."

Leo nodded, his relief hidden beneath exhaustion. "And what about my side?" he asked, wincing as he shifted positions on the bed. "How much longer will I need to stay in the lab?"

Donnie seemed to consider for a moment before offering a small shrug. "Not too much longer. I still want to keep an eye on the stitches, and with your cracked ribs you shouldn't be moving around too much, but honestly we can probably move you back into your own room as soon as you can get around a little easier. We'll keep working on getting you up and about each day, and once your endurance has built up a little bit we'll make the move."

Leo seemed content with that answer, sinking back against the pillows and letting his eyes slide closed. Raph knew that despite his brother's earlier statement about not needing a nap, he would likely fall asleep soon.

But not yet.

Raph sent a questioning look toward Mikey and Donnie, receiving small nods from each of them in return, indicating they were behind him in this. He turned back to the bed. "Leo, we need to talk," he stated without preamble, keeping his voice low but interjecting a firm tone.

Leo opened his eyes, looking up at Raph in surprise, his expression turning instantly wary. "About what?" he asked, trying and failing to sound nonchalant.

"Let's start with whatever's eating your shell," Raph answered bluntly. No sense in beating around the bush. "Something's bothering you, and we'd like to know what it is."

Leo flinched, the movement so minute Raph might have missed it if he hadn't been watching his brother so closely. The next moment Leo's mask was firmly in place, his face unreadable as he looked up at them. "Why should anything be bothering me?" he asked evenly. "I'm home, I'm alive, and I have my memories back. How could I possibly ask for anything more?"

Raph narrowed his eyes, the old familiar frustration beginning to build up in his gut. Of course Leo wasn't going to make this easy. His brother was nothing short of an expert at deflection and avoidance when he didn't want to talk about something. Usually Raph would just let it go, but that wasn't going to happen this time. Leo was about to learn that his brothers could be every bit as stubborn as he was.

"You're right," Donnie said, speaking before Raph could. The purple banded turtle moved to stand beside the bed, reaching out one hand to rest gently on Leo's shoulder. "By all rights you should be on top of the world right now, injuries not withstanding. _Should_ be…" he put gentle emphasis on the word, "…but you're not. So why is that?"

Leo seemed uncertain how to respond in the face of Donnie's gentle question. He shifted uncomfortably against the pillows, his gaze dropping down to the blanket lying across his lap, his fingers picking nervously at the soft fabric. "I don't know. I guess I'm just tired, Donnie," he finally replied, his tone certainly weary enough to give credence to his statement.

Raph wasn't about to be put off that easily.

"Sorry Leo, but you're going to have to do better than that," he growled, crossing his arms over his plastron and staring down at his brother until Leo looked up at him. There was something uncharacteristically hesitant, almost fearful in Leo's gaze, and Raph almost felt bad for pressuring him like this, when he was obviously so tired and worn out. He reminded himself that this wouldn't be necessary if Leo wasn't so damn stubborn.

"We're just trying to help, Leo," Mikey added softly from the foot of the bed, his tone earnest. "Why won't you talk to us?"

Leo dragged one hand wearily down across his face, his shoulder's visibly sagging. "Mikey," he began, then paused, as though searching for the right words. "I just…don't really want to talk right now."

Leo's tone was almost pleading, and Raph felt his resolve waver slightly. Maybe they were pushing too soon. Maybe they should give Leo a little more time. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, he dismissed it. All it took was one look at his brother's exhausted face and he knew this couldn't wait another day. Whatever was bothering Leo was eating his brother up from the inside out, disrupting his sleep and his healing, and it needed to stop.

"Tough," he answered grimly, catching Leo's gaze and holding it firmly with his own, letting his brother know without words that they wouldn't be backing down.

Leo was the first to look away.

Mikey took this as his cue, moving from the end of the bed to stand beside Donnie. "Bro, it's been two weeks and we've hardly talked about what happened at all. I know it was a tough time for you, but it was a tough time for us too. Maybe talking about it will be good for _all_ of us."

Raph silently applauded his little brother on his genius. As long as Leo thought they were trying to make him talk simply for _his _sake, then he would bottle up like a clam protecting a pearl. But if Mikey was the one who needed to talk...?

"I doubt talking about it will help much, Mikey," Leo said after a moment, his tone resigned.

"We won't know unless we try, will we?" Donnie answered, offering his brother an encouraging smile.

Leo looked like he still wanted to argue, but he must have realized it wouldn't do him any good. They had him corned, and none of them were willing to back down. He released a deep sigh, his gaze dropping back down to his lap.

Mikey suddenly stiffened, his blue eyes growing round as a thought seemed to suddenly occur to him. "Is it us?" he asked softly, his tone hesitant, even fearful. "Have we done something to…."

That certainly got Leo's attention. His head snapped up, his eyes widening even as he cut Mikey off with a hoarse, "NO!" Mikey didn't look entirely convinced, and Leo rushed on, his voice taking on the firm, no-nonsense tone he adopted when in full out leader mode. "No Mikey. None of this is your fault, do you hear me." His gaze moved to take in Donnie and Raph as well, his blue eyes piercing, all hint of his earlier hesitancy gone. "None of this is _any_ of your fault, so get that out of your head _right now_!"

An awkward silence fell, and Raph found that it was his turn to drop his eyes from his brother's sharp gaze. This was a conversation they had already had once before, and Raph was honestly doing his best to move past the feelings of guilt. But it wasn't easy. He had abandoned his brother, and there was no way he would ever fully forgive himself for that fact, no matter how many times Leo tried to absolve him of that guilt.

It was Donnie who finally broke the silence. "None of this is _your_ fault either, you know," he murmured, his hand still firmly gripping Leo's shoulder.

Raph glanced up in time to see the look that crossed Leo's face. It was a look that told him Donnie had just hit the proverbial nail right on its head. He felt his eyes widening with surprise, unable to comprehend _how_ their brother could possibly be feeling guilty. It was irritating, really, and so very typically _Leo_. It was just like Leo to overlook their guilt while drowning himself in his own, even when, from Raph viewpoint, there was absolutely _nothing_ their brother had to be feeling guilty for. He was convinced that if someday the sun decided to stop shining, Leo would find some way to take responsibility for it.

"Talk to us, bro," Mikey urged gently, reaching out and touching Leo's leg softly.

Leo looked at Mikey in resignation, his eyes shadowed with a pain Raph couldn't understand. "I just can't stop thinking about my time with the wolf pack," he admitted quietly. He swallowed hard, and when he continued it sounded as if he was having to force the words out. "You guys don't know what it was like…you don't know what _I_ was like. It was like being a completely different person. The…the things I did…" He broke off, swallowing hard, his green skin flushing a deeper hue. He didn't drop his head again, but Raph could tell it was only through an effort of sheer will.

"None of that was your fault," Raph growled, unable to keep silent any longer. "You didn't remember anything Leo. You didn't know any better, and the wolves used you…manipulated you."

Leo shrugged, his expression morose. "Maybe that's true Raph, but it doesn't change what happened. It doesn't make it go away. And the truth is, even while I was doing those things…while I was stealing and fighting for the pack…I _knew_ it was wrong. But I did it anyway." Leo shook his head, as though he were trying to deny the very words coming from his mouth, but he didn't stop talking. The words kept flowing, as though a dam had been broken and nothing could hold them back. "The truth is, there was a part of me that enjoyed working with the pack. I enjoyed the approval and respect when I did a job well. I enjoyed showing off my skills and knowing that I was accomplishing something the others couldn't. I enjoyed the feeling of being a part of something bigger than myself. In their own way the wolf pack gave me a sense of belonging when I had nothing of my own to hold onto. I craved that belonging…enough that I was willing to toss aside any sense of hesitancy I felt about what we were doing. I can't stop thinking about what I might have become if…if..." Leo finally trailed off, looking miserable.

"If?" Mikey murmured quietly, breaking the brief silence. "You mean _if_ you hadn't saved me? _If_ you hadn't taken a risk and done what was right even though you couldn't remember anything?"

Leo let out a soft snort. "I hate to admit it Mikey, but I wasn't exactly acting out of a pure heart. I desperately needed answers, and you were the best bet of getting them. Otherwise, I might have left you to your fate." His tone was full of self-loathing as he made the admission.

A shocked silence fell, but it didn't last long.

"Bull crap!" Raph snapped, taking everyone by surprise. He scowled down at Leo, fighting to keep his irritation in check. "You told Mikey before that you rescued him because you knew the wolves would kill him if you didn't. Even then, when you didn't know who he was, when in fact you had every reason to believe that _he _had betrayed _you_, you still saved him. As for the rest, you simply did what you had to do to survive, and I, for one, am glad you did."

"But…" Leo began, but Raph cut him off with a sharp hand gesture. He wasn't about to let his brother beat himself up for something he'd had no control over.

"You may have lost yourself for a time, but when it was important, when it really mattered, you still made the right choice, and there's no way in hell you're going to convince me that was just lucky coincidence. You're the most honorable, overly noble, carry-the-weight-of-the-world pain in the shell I've ever met, and nothing about that has changed. _Nothing!_"

Donnie and Mikey were staring at him in open surprise, but Raph ignored them, his focus completely on his older brother. He couldn't even imagine what it would be like to so thoroughly lose yourself that you became the very thing you had always despised, but he was determined to get Leo to see that all of that was behind him now. He had to let it go and move on, just like he had urged Raph to do.

Leo met his gaze for several long moments, a myriad of emotions flashing through his eyes before he finally looked away with a small shake of his head. "You know Raph, I think you're the only guy in the world that can make a compliment sound so insulting."

And just like that some of the tension in the room seemed to ease.

Raph gave his brother a small smile, shrugging one shoulder in a nonchalant gesture. "Everyone's gotta have a talent," he replied arrogantly. "Mine is knocking some sense into you when you're being stupid."

Leo let out a small huff, shaking his head ruefully but not arguing. He settled back against the pillows, releasing a deep sigh, his expression turning thoughtful.

"It wasn't _all_ bad," he stated softly after a few moments of silence. "There were some good times too. Mostly with Viz."

Mikey leaned forward, his expression eager. "Will you tell us about it?" he begged, sounding for all the world like a child pleading for a bed time story.

Leo looked hesitant, but he'd never been any good at saying no to Mikey, especially when the youngest was employing the full power of his puppy dog eyes "I guess…" he answered softly, clearly reluctant. He glanced toward Donnie and received an encouraging smile, then looked over at Raph. Raph nodded his own encouragement, surprised to find that he was almost as eager as Mikey to hear the story of Leo's time with the pack. He needed to understand what Leo had gone through if he was to have any hope of encouraging his brother to let the past go.

Leo took a deep breath, obviously collecting his thoughts. Then he began to speak.

"I don't remember much of the first few weeks…"

* * *

Leo lay back against the pillows, staring up at the ceiling above him, his thoughts a jumbled swirl tossing back and forth through his head. He knew he should be sleeping, his body beyond exhausted after hours of staying awake talking with his brothers, but he couldn't seem to let go of consciousness. There was just too much to think about…too much to consider.

He was surprised to realize that Mikey had been right. Sharing with his family about his time with the wolf pack had been surprisingly therapeutic. He still felt guilty about the things he had done, and probably always would, but talking about it had been the first step in starting to put it all behind him. It had also helped to see that none of his brothers looked at him any differently. In their eyes he was the same as he had always been, and that knowledge helped lift some of the burden Leo hadn't even realized he had been carrying; the fear that they would somehow think less of him after what he had done.

They had listened to his story intently, interjecting questions occasionally, but otherwise just allowing him to talk. And Leo had told them everything. Or, _almost _everything. He had glossed over his experience in the Spirit Realm, unwilling to share the details of what it had taken in order to gain back his memory. It wasn't something he could bring himself to talk about just yet. Already his subconscious mind terrorized him by replaying the scene in vivid detail over and over again every time he slept.

Leo couldn't hide the nightmares from his family, but he could hide their _cause_. It was for their sake as much as his own that he kept silent. He didn't want to tell them that each night he relived the worst moments of his life. He didn't want to share with them the loneliness and terror that would overwhelm him over and over again as he waited helplessly for death. He didn't want to explain to them that he still felt the cold lap of water against his chin hours after waking. They would only look on him with pity, all the while blaming themselves, and that was the last thing he wanted.

If his brothers suspected he was holding back, they hadn't said anything. When he was done talking, Leo had felt both relieved and incredibly drained. He had wanted to ask his brothers to share their own story about the time he had been gone, but it was already growing late, and Donnie had ushered everyone out of the lab while ordering Leo to get some sleep

That had been nearly an hour ago.

"You're doing it again, you know."

Leo jerked slightly in surprise, turning to face the door to the lab where Raph stood regarding him, a magazine hanging limply from one hand.

"Doing what?" he asked wearily, shifting to try and find a more comfortable position on the bed.

"Thinking instead of sleeping," Raph replied succinctly, stepping into the lab and moving over to the chair positioned beside the bed. "It's late, Leo, you need to sleep."

Leo swallowed a sigh, knowing his brother was right. In all honesty he had expected to fall asleep as soon as his head hit the pillows, but after everything that had happened today he was having a hard time shutting off his brain. And maybe there was a small part of him that was simply afraid of facing the demons in his own mind. The nightmares were always worse at night.

"Are you in pain?" Raph asked softly, and Leo could feel his brother's eyes on him, intent and watchful. He realized he was grimacing and quickly schooled his features to smoothness.

"No," he answered quietly, and it was _mostly_ true. His body ached all over, but it was a familiar sensation and he much preferred it to the numb and groggy feeling he got when Donnie increased his pain meds. It was much harder to fight his way free of the nightmares when he was drugged.

Raph let out a small grunt, but he didn't say anything as he slipped into the chair and flipped the magazine open across his lap.

Leo observed his brother for a few silent minutes, taking in the still healing cuts that covered his body and the deep shadows under his eyes. Raph had been staying with him almost every night, and Leo knew his brother had be feeling exhausted himself.

"You know you don't have to stay with me Raph," he stated quietly. "You're tired. Why don't you go and get some sleep?"

Raph glanced up from his magazine, giving Leo a level stare. "Well, if that's not the pot calling the kettle black, I don't know what is," he muttered dryly before giving a small shrug. "I'm used to staying up now. I don't mind sitting here for a while." He returned his gaze back down to the magazine, settling back in the chair in a way that indicated he wasn't planning on moving for a while.

Leo felt a small smile tip up the corners of his mouth, but he said nothing as he turned back to staring up at the ceiling. He had known Raph would stay, and he'd have been lying if he didn't say he was glad. If the nightmares got too bad he knew he could count on Raph to wake him. Not to mention it was nice not to be alone.

Being alone was something he had not experienced much of in the last few weeks. His family had become a constant, comforting presence whether he was awake or asleep. Mikey kept him entertained by reading to him from his comic books, his voices and reenactments of certain scenes amusing Leo more than the stories themselves. Splinter brought him cups of hot tea, and sometimes, if Leo was having a good day, they would practice some light meditation together. Donnie was an almost constant presence throughout the day, checking his wounds and doing light exercises with him to help keep him from becoming too stiff and sore while confined to bed. Even Raph spent hours at a time sitting by his bed, sometimes talking and sometimes merely reading one of his magazines, his presence a reliable comfort either way. Casey and April had taken turns keeping him company as well, filling him in on the goings on up on the surface and the ongoing investigation into the gang war.

At one point in time Leo would have found all the attention and lack of privacy suffocating, but that wasn't the case now. Right now, he _needed_ his family close.

Unbidden his mind flashed back to the flooded tunnel and the endless minutes he had spent completely alone, waiting for death to claim him. He gave an involuntary shudder, forcing the memory away with a sheer effort of will. His subconscious might insist on revisiting that horrible place over and over again while he was asleep, but he wasn't about to let his thoughts dwell on it while conscious. If he did, he was pretty sure he would go mad.

"I had nightmares too, ya know."

Raph's quiet statement pulled Leo abruptly from his dark thoughts, and he turned to stare at his brother in surprise. Raph wasn't looking at him, his gaze still fixed on the magazine on his lap, but there was a tense set to his brother's shoulders that told Leo Raph's words weren't as nonchalant as they seemed.

"They started up the same night we thought we lost you," Raph continued, his voice soft and even, but carrying the ghost of a deep, hidden pain. "They were always the same, and they always involved that…that _place_. They were bad enough that most nights I ended up in the bathroom heaving my guts out into the toilet."

"Raph…" Leo began, but found he couldn't finish, his throat closing on the words. He was afraid the conversation was about to head in a direction he wasn't ready for, but he couldn't bring himself to tell Raph to stop. His heart was hammering wildly inside his chest even as it ached at the thought of his strong and tough brother in so much pain.

Raph finally looked up, his green eyes meeting Leo's, and Leo could see the flash of embarrassment in his gaze before he looked away. "I didn't tell anyone," Raph continued, the fingers of one hand idly playing with the edges of his magazine as he stared out into the shadows on the far side of the lab. "I think Master Splinter knew, but he didn't ever press me to talk about them."

Leo swallowed, unsure what to say in the face of his brother's admission. It wasn't like Raph to share something so deeply personal, and it was obvious that it was costing the red banded turtle to do so. Leo couldn't help but feel honored even as he worried about his brother's motives. Raph might put on a rough and tough exterior, but Leo knew from experience that his brother could also be extremely perceptive when he put his mind to it. Perhaps the gaps in Leo's story hadn't gone as unnoticed as he had thought.

This thought was confirmed a moment later as Raph continued. "I don't know exactly what happened in the Spirit Realm to give you back your memory, but once that happened, you no doubt remembered what happened in the tunnels that night." He paused, his green eyes shining with something sad and haunted. Leo could do nothing but stare at him and wait for him to continue, dread building inside his chest. Raph finally gave a small shrug. "I guess it's only natural that you would have nightmares about it too."

How his brother had put two and two together, Leo had no idea. It was the type of intuition Leo would have expected out of Donnie, not Raph. He supposed it didn't really matter. Raph _knew_, and judging by his comments earlier, Leo fully expected his brother to push to get him to talk about it. He felt every muscle in his body tense, prepared for the battle that was sure to come.

Raph was watching him with a guarded expression, but upon seeing Leo tense up he quickly shook his head, his features registering chagrin. "Relax, Leo," he stated softly. "I'm not going to force you to talk about it." He paused, a sardonic smile lifting the corners of his mouth. "I mean, I was…earlier. But now…" he shrugged. "I guess it would be pretty hypocritical of me, huh?"

Leo wasn't quite sure what to make of his brother's words. Why would Raph bring this all up in the first place if he wasn't planning on confronting Leo about it?

As if in direct answer to his unspoken question, Raph spoke again. "I just wanted you to know that I understand what you're going through, and if you ever need to talk about it…I'm here."

Leo was beginning to wonder how many times Raph could surprise him in one day. This conversation had not turned out at all as he had expected. Instead of being confrontational like before, Raph had remained unaggressive and quiet, opening up to Leo without any expectation of reciprocity. It was so unlike his brother that Leo was beginning to wonder if he had fallen asleep and was dreaming all this.

He swallowed hard, forcing words out through a too tight throat. "Thanks, Raph."

Raph gave a single nod of his head before settling back in his chair and returning his attention to his magazine. "Good. Now that that's settled…go to sleep Leo. You look like something the dog's been chewing on."

Leo found himself obediently settling back into the mound of pillows behind him, but if he had thought his mind too full to sleep before, it was nothing compared to how he felt now. He knew he had just dodged a bullet and should let the matter die, but the overprotective big brother in him was squirming with a single question…

"Do you still have them? The nightmares?"

Raph glanced up from his magazine, a look of surprise on his face. He thought for a moment, then gave a small shake of his head. "Not since you came home," he answered simply.

Leo nodded, chest tight. The reply seemed so simple, and yet he sensed that there was a far deeper wisdom behind it. Raph's nightmares had gone away after learning that Leo was still alive. He wasn't in that place anymore. He had made it out. He had survived. It was a truth blatant in its obviousness, and yet subtle in its significance.

'_I'm not there_.' Leo thought slowly. _'I made it out. It's over now, and I don't ever have to go back there again.'_

He felt something tight inside his chest suddenly loosen, a sudden wave of overwhelming relief washing through him. He didn't realize he was reaching out with his hand until he felt Raph take it, his grip hard and fierce, a silent promise that his brother was there, that Leo wasn't alone.

"Thanks Raph," he whispered again, but this time the words weren't strained, but instead filled with all the relief and gratefulness he felt toward a brother he knew would never abandon him…who would always be there for him.

His only reply was a tight squeeze of the hand, and then Leo was finally drifting into the peaceful embrace of sleep. It was a sleep that would last for many hours, his dreams for once, completely untroubled.

TBC

_Okay, so I had to add a bit of sap there at the end. I'm a sucker for it, I'll admit._

_Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Leave me your thoughts!_

_There will be one final chapter to sort of tie up some loose ends, and then that will be all my friends. _

_It has truly been a joy to take this journey with you, despite all the speed bumps along the way!_


	30. Chapter 30

Epilogue

Life could be cruel.

Leonardo reflected on this fact as he stood atop the roof of the brownstone apartment building, looking out at the bright lights of the city, his bandana tails whipping out behind him in the cool evening breeze. The smell of rain hung heavy in the air, the dark clouds above brightening occasionally with flickers of lightning accompanied by the low growl of thunder.

Leo was unconcerned by the approaching storm, his thoughts on a different night many months ago…the night he and his brothers had raced across these very rooftops on their way to investigate an explosion downtown. They hadn't known at the time that their lives were about to be changed forever. The deep wounds caused by the unfolding of that single event were still visible in the scars that they all carried. Scars that were both seen and unseen. Scars that had begun to fade, but would never be gone completely.

It seemed to him that his family carried more than their fair share of scars.

It was something he had thought about a lot in the last couple of months, as his body had slowly been healing. He'd listened to his brothers describe what it had been like while he was gone, finding the story more difficult to listen to than he had thought it would be. His family had suffered tremendously, and even though the whole horrible ordeal was behind them now, each of them would carry the memories with them as surely as they carried the scars.

It was a heavy burden to bear at times.

Movement at the edge of the roof caught his attention, and he tensed, reaching behind him with one hand to grip the hilt of one of his blades. The reaction was an automatic one, and as soon as his mind caught up to his instincts he immediately released the hilt of his weapon and dropped his arm. A moment later a familiar form emerged from the heavy shadows, pausing for only a moment before steadily approaching.

"So you got my message," Viz called in greeting, his gray fur glinting dully in the flickers of lightning. "I wasn't sure you would."

Leo nodded, greeting his friend with a warm smile. "I got it. Though I have to say, you freaked Casey out a bit when he found the envelope on his window sill. Even more so when he realized who it was from."

Viz shrugged, coming to a halt several paces away, his dark eyes gleaming. "Do you know how many nights it took wandering the city before I finally picked up his scent and tracked him home? I was about ready to give up."

"Well I'm glad you didn't," Leo replied lightly. "It's good to see you Viz."

Viz grunted. "And it is good to see you as well, my young friend. Last time we parted you did not look so well. I was worried you would not survive."

Leo grimaced slightly, running one hand absently over the raised scar on his right forearm. The area was still tender to the touch. "I almost didn't," he answered softly.

Viz nodded in understanding, his expression turning curious. "And what of your family?" he asked. "I had expected them to be here with you tonight. After everything that had happened I did not think they would like you meeting with me alone."

Leo shrugged, offering his friend a wry smile. "They didn't," he answered honestly. "But I asked them for some privacy, and they agreed." He didn't bother to mention exactly how reluctantly his brothers had given that agreement, nor the fact that he was sure they were somewhere close by, watching, ready to leap to his aid should he need it. Leo trusted Viz completely, but he knew his family would never be able to fully share in that trust, even after what the gray wolf had done to save him from Alpha. Only Leo truly understood just how much that act had cost Viz.

"How are _you_ doing?" he asked pointedly, looking the gray wolf up and down. Viz hadn't looked all that great himself the last time Leo had seen him, but any new scars he carried were now hidden beneath his thick fur. Or perhaps even deeper.

Viz cocked his head to one side, considering the question. "I am as good as can be expected," he finally answered, his tone even but traced with an undercurrent of lingering pain he could not hide. "I buried Alpha somewhere where his remains will not be found. I will miss him, but will remember the good times we had together and try to forget the bad. It is all I can do."

Leo understood only too well. Viz wasn't the only one struggling to put the past behind him and move forward.

"I found Talon shortly after leaving you and your brother," Viz went on, subtly shifting the conversation in a different direction. "He was badly injured and was almost taken by Karai's soldiers. We've been holed up in a warehouse by the East River ever since, allowing our wounds to heal." He paused, shaking his head slowly, his expression distant. "I never did find Two Toes. I fear Karai may have captured him."

"She didn't," Leo stated quietly. "He's dead. He went after Mikey and Donnie and ended up falling down a drainage shaft. Even if he somehow survived the fall, he would have been drowned in the rapids below."

Viz looked startled for a moment before letting out a deep breath, his gaze dropping to the surface of the roof. "I see," he replied, the barest hint of regret in his voice.

Leo didn't share in that regret, but he didn't say anything. He was glad Talon was still alive so that Viz would not have to be alone, but he could not bring himself to mourn for Two Toes. The black wolf had hated him with an unexplained passion, and after learning how close he had come to killing Casey, not to mention Donnie and Mikey, Leo couldn't help but feel relieved that the violent creatures was no longer around to threaten those he cared about.

"That is it, then," Viz stated softly after a moment of silence. "There is nothing left to tie us to the city. The wolf gang is over. Most of the leaders have been apprehended by the police, and the rest scattered." He released another long sigh, lifting his head to gaze out over the city. "I think it is for the best."

"Yes," Leo agreed quietly. "You still plan on leaving then?"

Viz slowly nodded, turning back to face Leo, his expression serious. "It is not safe for us here anymore. Karai still searches for us. I have seen her soldiers on several occasions, and when I went by the old warehouse it reeked of their scent."

"She's nothing if not persistent," Leo agreed grimly. "Where will you go?"

Viz shrugged. "North. Over the border, I think. There is a lot of wilderness where we can easily remain hidden from human eyes. We will leave tonight. I only wanted a chance to say goodbye before going."

"I'm glad you found me," Leo stated honestly. He stepped closer to Viz, looking up into the wolf's face. "I said it before, but I want to say it again. Thank you. For everything." The words were as inadequate as always, but Leo couldn't let Viz leave without letting the wolf know just how much he appreciated everything his friend had done. As awful as the past months had been, Leo had no doubt they would have been a hundred times worse without Viz.

The gray wolf smiled slightly, reaching out with one hand to grip Leo's shoulder. "I will accept your thanks only if you will accept mine. The circumstances were not ideal, yet still I am glad to have met you and to be able to call you friend. You are a brave and honorable soul, Blade."

Leo opened his mouth to correct Viz, but then just as quickly closed it again. He wasn't Blade any longer, but he was done denying the fact that he once had been. The name had been given to him by Viz, and in a way it would always be a part of Leo now, the good and the bad.

"I should be going," Viz continued. "Talon is waiting for me, and we hope to be well clear of the city before dawn." He paused, sniffing slightly at the air before letting a lazy grin stretch the corners of his mouth. "Besides, our close proximity is making your family…" he paused, as though searching for the right word, before ending with a simple, "…nervous."

Leo let out a soft snort. "I have no doubt," he replied dryly. "They've become a bit protective of me of late."

Viz chuckled, genuine warmth in the sound. "I am glad. At least I will know you have someone watching your back."

Leo nodded, smiling slightly. "Always," he murmured, briefly glancing out into the still shadows around him where he knew his brothers quietly waited.

"Goodbye my friend." Viz stated, releasing Leo's shoulder and taking a step back.

Leo swallowed a sudden lump in his throat. "Goodbye Viz," he replied softly. "I hope we will meet again someday."

"In this life or the next," Viz acknowledged, nodding to Leo one final time before turning and striding toward the edge of the roof. Leo watched him until he disappeared into the shadows, unable to deny the sharp loss he felt at seeing the wolf go. With their lives, true friends were somewhat hard to come by, and he regretted having to say goodbye to one now.

Turning his gaze back out across the city, Leo waited patiently for his brothers to join him. He didn't have to wait long. They approached silently from behind him, but still he knew they were there, just as he knew it was Raph who laid a hand on his shoulder before his brother even spoke.

"You okay?"

Leo nodded, his gaze still locked before him. "Yeah," he murmured quietly, surprised to find he meant it. In the past months he had thought about Viz a lot, all the time doubting he would ever see the gray wolf again. Then Casey had brought him the note, and Leo had been undeniably excited at the chance to meet with his friend one last time. He knew he would miss Viz, but at least now he had some sense of closure. He was surprised by how much that meant to him.

A flash of lightning lit up the dark city in a sudden spray of light, and the following boom was loud enough Leo could feel the vibrations of it rock through his body. As one they all looked up into the dark clouds looming above, both awed and humbled by the power of the building storm.

"We should probably get off the roof," Donnie stated evenly. "I'm not keen on becoming fried turtle."

Mikey let out a loud snort. "Dude, we've survived foot ambushes, explosions, giant mutated wolves trying to rip out our spleens…" He made a dismissing gesture with one hand. "No way in shell we're taken out by lightning. Fate likes us too much!"

Leo turned to gape at his brother, for a moment unsure if he had heard Mikey correctly. Fate liked them? After everything they had been through that statement seemed the very definition of absurd. And yet, as he allowed his mind to process the rest of Mikey's words, he couldn't help but admit his brother had a point. They had gone through more than most people would ever have to face in their entire lives, and yet they were all still alive. They were all still together. That was no small thing.

He supposed in the end it all came down to perspective. One could look at all they had been forced to endure and conclude that life was cruel. Or…one could look at all they had _survived _and conclude that life was good. In that moment, Leo felt more than a little envious of his youngest brother's natural ability to look at everything on the bright side.

"April called and invited us over to her place for pizza and a movie," Mikey went on, completely oblivious to Leo's thoughts. "What do you say, Leo, want to go?"

Leo stared into Mikey's hopeful face, considering the offer and finding that it appealed to him. It seemed like forever since he had been to April apartment, and the truth was the lair was beginning to feel a bit close and stuffy. Getting out tonight had been nice, and Leo wasn't yet ready to go back. He was a little tired and sore, but not overly so, and he figured he could relax and rest just as easily at April's house as he could at home.

"Yeah Mikey, we can go," he replied, before adding "but only if you text April and ask her to pick up some ice-cream to go with the pizza."

Mikey let out a whoop of excitement, and Donnie and Raph both grinned widely, their eyes shining with unconcealed excitement. They crowded around Mikey as he fished out his phone, arguing loudly over what type of pizza and ice-cream to request, completely ignoring the next boom of thunder that sounded loudly from overhead. The first drops of moisture escaped from the dark clouds, splattering down onto the rooftop in a prelude to the deluge that was soon to come.

Leo watched his brothers for a moment before tilting his head back and closing his eyes, reveling in the feel of the rain against his face. There was something about thunderstorms that he had always liked. Maybe it was the display of raw power nature put on for all to see. Or maybe it was the way it drowned out the nearly constant noise of the city, replacing the smell of tar and oil and old food with something fresh and clean. It was invigorating, filling him with a sense of renewal and hope.

He decided it was past time to take a page out of Mikey's book. Tonight he would be surrounded with family and friends and good food.

Tonight…life was good.

The End!

_Wow. You have no idea the emotions that ran through me as I typed those last two words! Phew, this story has been such an exciting journey for me, and I only hope you enjoyed reading half as much as I enjoyed writing! I will take this final opportunity to thank everyone who has followed, favorited, and reviewed this story. I cannot tell you enough what a huge encouragement every single one of you has been to me!_

_Until next time…._


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